DAZ WATCHES WORST education video EVER

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Комментарии • 20 тыс.

  • @robyngrey68
    @robyngrey68 4 года назад +6800

    Woman:**talking about a serious virus**
    Daz: Was this sausage roll
    made by Zeus or something!?

  • @hxil_to_the_kxng
    @hxil_to_the_kxng 4 года назад +2533

    *"Sorry, I need to grow up... Slippery... She's not an ice rink."*
    *"He's just there with a camera like 'BEND HER, OVER'"

    • @THEDONSTR8Fightah76
      @THEDONSTR8Fightah76 4 года назад +8

      Yeah I watched this video. you don't need to quote to get likes, dumbass.

    • @Phlanger61
      @Phlanger61 4 года назад +20

      I read this as he said it

    • @Beaniebean69
      @Beaniebean69 4 года назад +7

      XD I can’t stop laughing

    • @angelenergy2084
      @angelenergy2084 4 года назад +12

      ThaRealSTR8Fightah 76 stop coining for him he can do what he wants

    • @demimedlam7435
      @demimedlam7435 4 года назад +9

      ThaRealSTR8Fightah 76 shut up you mong 😂

  • @offendontop
    @offendontop 4 года назад +5335

    “Slippery? She’s not an ice rink.” - Daz Black 2020

  • @frangrech08
    @frangrech08 2 года назад +885

    Daz literally nailed the impression of Peter Griffin saying “shut up Meg”.

  • @shckzz4465
    @shckzz4465 3 года назад +8621

    Daz: * holds up the sausage roll *
    “this is love”
    i felt that.

    • @Gone_Wacky
      @Gone_Wacky 3 года назад +16

      Same lol

    • @FreakingPlane
      @FreakingPlane 3 года назад +23

      On a spiritual level....

    • @Jamie_idkrlly
      @Jamie_idkrlly 3 года назад +16

      I like greggs sausage rolls they are soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo good

    • @ThePinkice6
      @ThePinkice6 3 года назад +2

      Yep😂

    • @monkeyboi1553
      @monkeyboi1553 3 года назад +2

      Ok, don’t want to start a war, but do you prefer Greg’s or Baynes.

  • @sugahsprinklezlol2430
    @sugahsprinklezlol2430 4 года назад +5704

    "W-what if I wanna have sex before I get married?"
    "Well, I guess you'll just have to be prepared to die."
    One of my favorite vines of all time 😂😂😂😂

    • @devotedmaggot6511
      @devotedmaggot6511 4 года назад +47

      Yes omg can we be friends

    • @atsukokagari_
      @atsukokagari_ 4 года назад +44

      that's what i thought when i saw the video, im surprised daz didn't talk about it lol

    • @harrymorrison2186
      @harrymorrison2186 4 года назад +7

      Hahaha

    • @ConnorPearson18
      @ConnorPearson18 4 года назад +8

      sugahsprinklez LOL I heard that as a 5 year old and I am christian 😂 but now I am 14 and well, I guess I am dying soon 😂 (if you get what I was getting at)

    • @sugahsprinklezlol2430
      @sugahsprinklezlol2430 4 года назад +3

      @@ConnorPearson18 lmao nice (I got it)

  • @PIanet_jiji
    @PIanet_jiji 4 года назад +673

    "Tell me she's not dressed like Meg Griffin"
    "Shut up Meg"
    LMAOOO

  • @mr.wombat828
    @mr.wombat828 2 года назад +293

    Daz is the only person who I don't get creeped out by when he eats on camera, instead, he makes it funny! What a legend!

    • @Cassxowary
      @Cassxowary 2 года назад

      Look up what is involved in and caused by nonhuman animal products like meat (:

    • @mybaIIz
      @mybaIIz Год назад +3

      @@Cassxowary "Frieza space music for relaxation/sleep/etc"

  • @abbyfriesl3151
    @abbyfriesl3151 4 года назад +2745

    “What if I want to have sex before I get married” teacher- I guess you will have to prepare to die” I-💀

    • @ellah346
      @ellah346 4 года назад +102

      i didn't even realise that meme came from this video

    • @Brainjarmen
      @Brainjarmen 4 года назад +54

      Ladies and gentlemen we found the meme *HEAVY APPLAUSE INTENSIFIES*

    • @jojocaitlin8508
      @jojocaitlin8508 4 года назад +20

      I THOUGHT YOU WERE JOKING 😱😂

    • @badtothebone2085
      @badtothebone2085 4 года назад +8

      Why does it sound like a threat tho?

    • @JonoZaidi
      @JonoZaidi 4 года назад +5

      Actually if she is religious she is preventing them from having kids so Jesus can have more followers and more people with his faith
      Don’t flame me it was just a joke

  • @beefy6729
    @beefy6729 4 года назад +724

    “well that’s a bit depressing love. maybe if you weren’t wearing *YOUR CURTAINS* your husband would do more for ya”

  • @coachcheyenne5911
    @coachcheyenne5911 2 года назад +324

    “I guess you have to be prepared to die.” Had me rolling 😂😂😂😂 imagine a teacher saying that to a kid now and days😂😂😂 God I miss talks like that lol

  • @mollyoconnor9365
    @mollyoconnor9365 3 года назад +2325

    My lovely, catholic mother, when I asked at age 10 "mum, what's sex?"
    "well uh, the stick goes in the hole..."
    I haven't let her live that down

  • @lydia9978
    @lydia9978 4 года назад +7884

    Woman: *kisses boy
    Woman: “I feel slippery”

  • @venice7493
    @venice7493 4 года назад +1030

    Boy: "What if I wanna have sex before I get married?"
    Teacher: *So you have chosen death*

    • @bunnyfluff0210
      @bunnyfluff0210 4 года назад +41

      At my school its "If you have sex you're going to die and be forgotten while you burn in he'll
      Also... Schools are much worse
      I was crying one day and went to hug my bf for comfort.. Got detention for being inappropriate
      WHILE THIS BITCH IS GETTING ASAULTWD NEXT TO US, S C R E A M I N G FOR HELP MIND YOU
      But no hugging is a mortal sin apparently

    • @kai4435
      @kai4435 4 года назад +17

      Teacher: is that *premarital HAND HOLDING* i see you have chosen death young one

    • @attackfleed1301
      @attackfleed1301 4 года назад +2

      Its treason then

    • @AliKhan-vn2hv
      @AliKhan-vn2hv 4 года назад +2

      Candy Speice same happened to my gf
      It’s really stupid and dumb

    • @happysaladd8951
      @happysaladd8951 4 года назад +2

      HEROES NEVER DIE

  • @averywatkins9419
    @averywatkins9419 2 года назад +225

    My boss is looking at me with a mix of amusement and anger as I'm laughing my arse off lol I hope I'm not fired. Thanks Daze you're the GOAT

    • @astrus7110
      @astrus7110 2 года назад +6

      did you get fired?

    • @averywatkins9419
      @averywatkins9419 2 года назад +3

      @@astrus7110 thankfully not lol

    • @astrus7110
      @astrus7110 2 года назад +1

      @@averywatkins9419 good 👍

    • @bodabodapasta1500
      @bodabodapasta1500 2 года назад +3

      What r u doing watching this stuff at work in the first place?
      Edit: I guess I can’t really talk actually. I was once giggling to myself at a news article about Elon Musk being his usual cringey self while I was in my Uni library and meant to be setting up my laptop so I could get some work done! 😅

  • @Edasicaless
    @Edasicaless 3 года назад +11865

    Daz spends 70% of his videos laughing at his own jokes and its hilarious

  • @maia.j7060
    @maia.j7060 4 года назад +2792

    Teenagers: **exist**
    Daz: 'She's like one' 'She's just been born'

    • @noctuasun3112
      @noctuasun3112 3 года назад +31

      I’m one now 😔

    • @idi0t.r4t80
      @idi0t.r4t80 3 года назад +11

      @@noctuasun3112 i like your username

    • @noctuasun3112
      @noctuasun3112 3 года назад +8

      @@idi0t.r4t80 ty 😁

    • @speechless3882
      @speechless3882 3 года назад +12

      she’s just a fetus 💀

    • @lanaxvonso4952
      @lanaxvonso4952 3 года назад +11

      The kids he called one are actually 12 or 13 or mabye 11

  • @mxcbeth
    @mxcbeth 3 года назад +4247

    “Slippery?!?! she’s not an ice rink!” got me killing myself laughing-

    • @FreakingPlane
      @FreakingPlane 3 года назад +10

      🤣🤣

    • @Jay_ZZ-v2t
      @Jay_ZZ-v2t 3 года назад +9

      🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @charliemartin-k7m
      @charliemartin-k7m 3 года назад +15

      I’d wish he would watch part 2 of this where this women calls the penis John Willy.

    • @modernfamilyluvver
      @modernfamilyluvver 3 года назад +7

      SHOTOOOOOOO OH MY HECK

    • @mxcbeth
      @mxcbeth 3 года назад +5

      @@modernfamilyluvver HIIII

  • @fireruby1882
    @fireruby1882 2 года назад +117

    Y’all I’m Christian but when I was 9-10 I was FED UP with not knowing and asked my mom blatantly “how do babies actually get made” and she said “oh gosh ok” and sat me down and told me the gosh dang truth. BE HONEST WITH UR KIDS 🤦🏻they can handle it. Of course I hated every second of it and still do cuz I’m asexual but you know what? She told me scientifically. We are a hardcore Christian family but I don’t recall her bringing God into it 💀she just straight up told me how it all happens. None of this “when 2 people love each other” crap no she told me all the science and asked me what I understood about my own body so that I could better understand. Don’t be a parent if you’re gonna lie to your kid.
    Anyway that’s my story😂anyone else have actually decent parents?

    • @milkyyblucheese
      @milkyyblucheese Год назад +5

      Not Me, but you have great parents I can see that

    • @BlueyHeelerHere543
      @BlueyHeelerHere543 Год назад +5

      Damn, my parents never ever taught me the actual way of how babies are made or where they come from. They just told me “they come from the mommy’s belly” and that’s it. Since then I’ve had so many theory’s in my head about how babies are made (like eating a jelly bean or getting married right on the spot) until I stumbled across the Internet and found out how.

  • @juli2139
    @juli2139 4 года назад +5809

    “Maybe if you weren’t WEARING YOUR CURTAINS YOUR HUSBAND MIGHT DO MORE” I’m sorry lmaoo😭😭

    • @tomas7717
      @tomas7717 4 года назад +46

      I just watched that bit while reading this

    • @beck699
      @beck699 4 года назад +16

      😂😂😂

    • @matthewlopez6219
      @matthewlopez6219 4 года назад +14

      I lost it when he said curtains💀🤣

    • @danielmeenaghan8819
      @danielmeenaghan8819 4 года назад +7

      SquixFN there are a lot of kids mincraft kids Fortnite kids and roblox kids you are a roblox kid

    • @joannepearce1
      @joannepearce1 4 года назад +5

      Julia hehe 😂

  • @nicolemacartney1772
    @nicolemacartney1772 3 года назад +1877

    2:40 daz: “the only things changing is my stomach going outwards”
    creepy lady: *winks*

    • @yourmum4758
      @yourmum4758 3 года назад +25

      I had to go back and watch that again and thats creepy

    • @beaumatusiak7170
      @beaumatusiak7170 3 года назад +4

      I dont think ill ever eat a sausage roll without thinking about this

  • @cassaasmr
    @cassaasmr 4 года назад +1802

    DID NO ONE SEE THAT THE SECOND VIDEO WAS CALLED-
    "Sex before marriage? Prepare to die!"
    I COULDN'T STOP LAUGHING😂😅😂

    • @cool9229
      @cool9229 4 года назад +76

      I can personally say I had sex before marriage and I died 4 years ago 😔

    • @sealiongod7981
      @sealiongod7981 4 года назад +3

      Omg LOL

    • @ronjavonpost7100
      @ronjavonpost7100 4 года назад +12

      Y'all I'm prepared to die, it okay tho 2020 kinda sucks😂

    • @Holly-cc5zy
      @Holly-cc5zy 4 года назад +2

      Same I was dying

    • @kenanmammadov7281
      @kenanmammadov7281 4 года назад +2

      YoghurtFox yeah!!!

  • @endermaid960
    @endermaid960 3 года назад +155

    *the video being about sex education*
    Daz: *begins video admiring a good sausage roll*

  • @hellerlakota
    @hellerlakota 3 года назад +4724

    I CANT BELIEVE HE ACTUALLY PUT IT AS HIS OUTRO 😭😭

  • @SoniMarSponge
    @SoniMarSponge 4 года назад +604

    The 2nd teacher is clearly sexually frustrated.
    Teacher: "I still never had sex yet so if I can't have sex, then these kids can't"!

    • @nancypg8722
      @nancypg8722 4 года назад +6

      ᴛʜᴇ ❗️sʜᴏᴜʟᴅ ʙᴇ ɪɴsɪᴅᴇ ᴛʜᴇ sᴘᴇᴀᴄʜ 😂sᴏᴢ ᴏɴʟɪɴᴇ sᴄʜᴏᴏʟɪɴɢ ʜᴀs ᴍᴇ

    • @woman9953
      @woman9953 4 года назад +1

      To trueeeee

  • @harrycozens01
    @harrycozens01 4 года назад +718

    "She's not an ice rink."
    "I'm not a tap."
    Sex biology is just a naughty utility.

    • @willowtree3854
      @willowtree3854 4 года назад +3

      Harry Cozens Shes not an Ice rink, I’m not a tap, can I make it anymore obvious.

    • @ameliashandcraftedmemes7888
      @ameliashandcraftedmemes7888 4 года назад +3

      "I don't shoot Evian"

    • @bigboibuff6056
      @bigboibuff6056 4 года назад +3

      Actually the woman is a door lock and the man is the key

  • @a.kitcat.b
    @a.kitcat.b 2 года назад +106

    🤭As a sex repulsed person I find this hilarious- and I am glad my mom really educated me more than my school ever did. As one of the first girls to get my period in elementary school I had to educate most of the girls because their parents were religious and didn't teach these poor girls.😟

  • @lucid_sicko8347
    @lucid_sicko8347 4 года назад +2183

    17 year old: *exists*
    Daz: DUDE THEIR LIKE *ONE*

    • @SnailsAnarchy
      @SnailsAnarchy 4 года назад +10

      @Froodle Noodle ive seen younger looking 17 year olds 😂

    • @phoebe6092
      @phoebe6092 4 года назад +14

      They look about 9

    • @killingeveedits8228
      @killingeveedits8228 4 года назад +2

      @Marilyn Pedroza Rodriguez true!

    • @emitosy4530
      @emitosy4530 4 года назад +7

      @Marilyn Pedroza Rodriguez 8 or 7???? That's very rare I think. I get a lot of girls get it young and I know there are some who get it at that age, but it's not typical at all. I havent met anyone who got it younger than 10

    • @vertig0sire788
      @vertig0sire788 4 года назад

      Daz knows too much

  • @valeriafil2932
    @valeriafil2932 4 года назад +580

    “what if i wanna have sex before marriage?”
    “well then u should be prepared to die” lmao what

    • @katya_karpeyev5833
      @katya_karpeyev5833 4 года назад +13

      I hate how premarital sex is so hated upon. It’s not wrong and people want to feel pleasure. I hate how people are so hated and frowned upon for teen pregnancies. It’s so horrible.

    • @ftdhar9741
      @ftdhar9741 4 года назад +3

      @@katya_karpeyev5833 as long as you wearing a condom you good 💀

    • @wya.ang1e
      @wya.ang1e 4 года назад +3

      McDrankles NoU condoms break 🤷‍♀️

    • @randomplayz9793
      @randomplayz9793 4 года назад +2

      I no but like how is it wrong to have sex before marriage like just how?

    • @ottowegner5570
      @ottowegner5570 4 года назад

      @@wya.ang1e Cause "WeArInG a CoNdOm Is LiKe PlAyInG rUsSiAn RoUlEtTe"

  • @abby.478
    @abby.478 3 года назад +753

    The way that teachers was explaining AIDS sounded like she thought that as soon as you get married, you become ammune to it.

  • @emmadelauter3647
    @emmadelauter3647 2 года назад +47

    Daz "And you have creepy ass dolls everywhere"
    I just started laughing my ass off🤣🤣

  • @babeno3777
    @babeno3777 4 года назад +428

    “Wow no foreplay? That’s depressing, love. Yeah? Maybe if you weren’t wearing YOUR CURTAINS, your husband might do more.”
    -Daz

    • @kayleighaj_1007
      @kayleighaj_1007 4 года назад +1

      I love it username
      May I enter the taeverse

    • @fluffyshinobu
      @fluffyshinobu 4 года назад

      @@kayleighaj_1007 did you seriously forget the fucking butter?

    • @Alicia-rs2np
      @Alicia-rs2np 4 года назад

      Can I please enter the Taeverse 🥺🥺

  • @bonem0ther451
    @bonem0ther451 4 года назад +3981

    every time daz sees a child: “she’s like...one”

  • @madib5984
    @madib5984 4 года назад +4385

    Boy: “What if I wanna have sex before I get married”
    Teacher: “well I guess you just have to be prepared to die”
    Me “THE VINE” 💀
    Edit: how tf this get so many likes 😂

    • @ElysianLilith
      @ElysianLilith 4 года назад +83

      I was surprised that daz didn't know it 🤔😂

    • @benztamondong9781
      @benztamondong9781 4 года назад +32

      The name of the video literally is titled 'Sex Before Marriage? PREPARE TO DIE' Like wtf?

    • @katesaurusrex5290
      @katesaurusrex5290 4 года назад +16

      I guess I'm dead then.

    • @johnmoselina1068
      @johnmoselina1068 4 года назад +5

      Vine was a banger

    • @alexneufville344
      @alexneufville344 4 года назад +9

      I'm surprised Daz didn't know it even though he was a viner

  • @shannonedge904
    @shannonedge904 2 года назад +25

    Daz is the ONLY youtuber that actually makes me laugh. His laugh is really contagious

  • @Gothi_6
    @Gothi_6 4 года назад +677

    Boy: What if I want to have sex before I get married?
    Woman: * Insert Sauromon voice * So you have chosen Death...

    • @rimarzd8132
      @rimarzd8132 4 года назад +3

      Saruman* c'mon g

    • @tonya1367
      @tonya1367 4 года назад +2

      ...well IM PREPARED TO DIE TAKE ME DAMIT

    • @Rose-ry6gm
      @Rose-ry6gm 4 года назад +1

      *Saruman

  • @melissadasilva8048
    @melissadasilva8048 3 года назад +2015

    “He’s just in the corner with a camera like”
    BEND HER OVER😂😂😂

  • @archieb1306
    @archieb1306 4 года назад +2776

    Nobody:
    Daz eating sausage roll: "this is some serious gourmet shit"

  • @1mimi33
    @1mimi33 2 года назад +2

    Thanks!

  • @fireboltpug2269
    @fireboltpug2269 4 года назад +274

    The part where she told the boy that he has to prepare to die that was actually a meme or a vine people made. When I watch compliation I see that scene

    • @keebofan4002
      @keebofan4002 4 года назад +5

      FireBolt Pug AHAHAHAH SAME-

  • @bunbun3.332
    @bunbun3.332 4 года назад +679

    "BeNd HeR oVeR" literally killed me XD

  • @rissieholifield2322
    @rissieholifield2322 4 года назад +724

    Lady: "...the woman's body is getting ready to receive the sperm."
    Daz: "yea she's like this: o0o

    • @brendacooper9881
      @brendacooper9881 4 года назад +8

      I cant I'm wheezing🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

    • @violetxbearbear60
      @violetxbearbear60 4 года назад +3

      I mean.. o0o

    • @mythologyalt3966
      @mythologyalt3966 4 года назад

      Risky bish hahahahaha haha I’m dying 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

    • @Josh_L06
      @Josh_L06 4 года назад

      Lol

    • @kaibohna8633
      @kaibohna8633 4 года назад +1

      𒊹︎0𒊹︎

  • @3llieJellie
    @3llieJellie Год назад +10

    8:46
    Had to come back to this and again had me in tears. My family was very concerned for me😭😭

    • @beansslays
      @beansslays Год назад +2

      HELP I LITERALLY ON THAT PART WHILE READING YOUR COMMENT- 😭

    • @jvicype3nutbutter454
      @jvicype3nutbutter454 5 месяцев назад

      AND ITS FUNNY CAUSE HE ACTUALLY DID THAT IN THE END OF THE VIDEO BAHAHAH

  • @freyanicholls4048
    @freyanicholls4048 4 года назад +530

    Daz at the club: wow you're fit
    Girl: aha thank yo-
    *gets smacked in the face by a banana*

  • @laurababe5177
    @laurababe5177 4 года назад +594

    “Yeah, she’s like this : 👁O👁” KILLED MEEEE

    • @tymorris4708
      @tymorris4708 4 года назад +6

      Same

    • @tahliaslade6618
      @tahliaslade6618 4 года назад +4

      As soon as I read this he said it and I cracked up to 😂

    • @tomrhodesmays
      @tomrhodesmays 4 года назад +3

      Same I came to the comments for that

  • @crushdlitlstars
    @crushdlitlstars 4 года назад +511

    Me: breathing
    Daz: Says one word
    Me: laughing my head off trying to breathe

  • @wonder_pountney2648
    @wonder_pountney2648 2 года назад +56

    Daz can make a simple thing hilarious by just laughing at it 🤣

  • @Ellasnaps
    @Ellasnaps 4 года назад +427

    “Maybe if you weren’t wearing your curtains your husband would do more”
    Excuse me while I resurrect🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @krimsonklaww611
    @krimsonklaww611 4 года назад +632

    Sex Ed back then can be summarized with two sentences:
    DON'T! GOD NO LIKEY!!

    • @wrxxsubaru976
      @wrxxsubaru976 4 года назад +5

      Krimson Klaww that technically two sentences

    • @krimsonklaww611
      @krimsonklaww611 4 года назад +4

      @@wrxxsubaru976 there fixed it.

    • @maximrao3778
      @maximrao3778 4 года назад

      That’s 4 words

    • @GokuBlack-cx3bh
      @GokuBlack-cx3bh 4 года назад +2

      @@maximrao3778 they count as sentences because of the exclamation point

  • @freya2261
    @freya2261 4 года назад +179

    All I could think while Angela was talking was 3 things:
    1: has she experienced this that often?
    2: why is a granny teaching us this?
    3: wtf is a woman teaching us about men?

  • @Same_Local.Insomnic
    @Same_Local.Insomnic 2 года назад +13

    1:05
    Daz:Today we will be looking at how far we have “come”
    Me:don’t say it don’t say it don’t say it don’t say it

  • @violatbaeza5432
    @violatbaeza5432 4 года назад +521

    “He’s just there with a camera BEND HER OVER” 😂😂😂

    • @rosmusicroom4623
      @rosmusicroom4623 4 года назад +3

      That kills me lol

    • @Fred01126
      @Fred01126 4 года назад +2

      I was laughing so much

    • @vgzq
      @vgzq 4 года назад +1

      3:48 😂💀

  • @harrietdoesnt
    @harrietdoesnt 4 года назад +1111

    I had a male teacher for science and we had sex ed, and i shouted “sir, what about foreplay” and he said “idk my wife never lets me do it” 😂😂 poor guy

  • @todddeily8032
    @todddeily8032 4 года назад +2179

    Daz: This is why I can’t be a teacher
    Me: Imagine Daz being a teacher..... THAT WOULD BE AWSOME

  • @kyleemarie419
    @kyleemarie419 2 года назад +48

    The finger into the circle thing is literally how I found out!! Besides being a ranch kid and seeing animals doing it i never rlly connected the dots. Well at least not till the day in sixth grade on the bus when the seventh graders found out and just kept going in and out😳😳😳😂

  • @diano_hallway7854
    @diano_hallway7854 3 года назад +3252

    "Just pictures it as if you're all crawling into one bed together"
    The girl: 😏

    • @pogofgreed3707
      @pogofgreed3707 3 года назад +16

      That’s a lot.

    • @jooshmeredooth1063
      @jooshmeredooth1063 3 года назад +15

      The 400th nezuko I have seen this week 😂

    • @Rattybyoy
      @Rattybyoy 3 года назад +32

      Me and that girl should be besties judging on that

    • @Michelangelorulez
      @Michelangelorulez 3 года назад +4

      @@jooshmeredooth1063 same this is like the 100 nezuko ive seen and its only monday

    • @Annie-wy5mc
      @Annie-wy5mc 3 года назад +4

      @@jooshmeredooth1063 Dayum son that's alot of Nezuko's!

  • @madi-tf8xx
    @madi-tf8xx 4 года назад +1239

    sex ed classes in the 80s: *boring*
    classes now: *cAcKLiNg aNd giGgLEs*

    • @jordansavage5300
      @jordansavage5300 4 года назад +27

      I cried out with laughter

    • @diddytehfeh7
      @diddytehfeh7 4 года назад +11

      Omg yes ahaha

    • @lillythompson130
      @lillythompson130 4 года назад +21

      i fucking cried from laughter no joke and i was send out because they though i had an asthma attack xd

    • @avastars3393
      @avastars3393 4 года назад +7

      So true lmao lmao lmao lol lol lol😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

    • @doggo9421
      @doggo9421 4 года назад +8

      I wouldn’t know I was not born then
      That good or bad bc I kinda hate my generation ngl just hate how everyone is always on there phone

  • @Luna-co1dt
    @Luna-co1dt 4 года назад +419

    No one:
    Daz: slippery? She’s not an ice rink.
    Me: on the floor laughing

  • @mleigh123
    @mleigh123 Год назад +16

    Regardless if you have sex before you get married or not, marriage isn’t gonna stop someone from getting aids if your spouse has it. That flight attendant lady doesn’t know wtf she’s talking about 🙄

  • @VaultTheorist
    @VaultTheorist 4 года назад +2255

    "Slippery.....shes not an ice rink!"
    "I need to grow up..."
    I cant-
    I'm dying of laughter
    Edit: okay okay I only saw this today but thank you for like a thousand likes and a daz heart!!! Thank youuuu

    • @Albme94
      @Albme94 4 года назад +23

      same, i dont wanna grow up, that shit is funny XD

    • @Z3tr_____
      @Z3tr_____ 4 года назад +2

      👍🏽

    • @sniperrat__277
      @sniperrat__277 4 года назад +1

      😂😂😂

    • @kittycat26934
      @kittycat26934 4 года назад +1

      😂✌

    • @ah9406
      @ah9406 4 года назад

      @@Albme94 me to me to let's go to Neverland lol xD

  • @kaylal.4038
    @kaylal.4038 4 года назад +1322

    daz : "how's it going dazz-"
    ad : " mY pErIoD gOeS bEyOnD pAiN "

  • @eva.1545
    @eva.1545 4 года назад +681

    Daz: Why would any girl draw a love heart and tape onto the wall
    4 year old me hiding in the corner

    • @avastars3393
      @avastars3393 4 года назад +6

      No me I am a trans boy

    • @lordsubnoseanomic
      @lordsubnoseanomic 4 года назад

      Why would you say that dude

    • @eva.1545
      @eva.1545 4 года назад +1

      @@lordsubnoseanomic why not?

    • @adrian404
      @adrian404 4 года назад +2

      It's just a bit random😂

    • @eva.1545
      @eva.1545 4 года назад

      @@adrian404 🤣

  • @gingerlynoise
    @gingerlynoise 4 года назад +4890

    “Maybe if you weren’t wearing your CURTAINS- your husband might do mORE”
    I literally almost choked

  • @jessicaslate8227
    @jessicaslate8227 2 месяца назад +4

    “You just have to be prepared to die!”
    Ahhhh, my wedding vows…

  • @gray4338
    @gray4338 4 года назад +3321

    As an Irish person, We do not claim the freaky old doll lady

    • @terra_the_nightingale135
      @terra_the_nightingale135 4 года назад +85

      Emily Reynolds I’m not catholic, just Christian. But we don’t claim her either.

    • @okeydokey827
      @okeydokey827 4 года назад +20

      I'm from Ireland too

    • @tiannaxl2813
      @tiannaxl2813 4 года назад +11

      Same 😂

    • @aaronwhite9901
      @aaronwhite9901 4 года назад +16

      I’m from cork yup yup 🇮🇪🇮🇪🔴⚪️

    • @Johnfitz7
      @Johnfitz7 4 года назад +6

      Jennifer White same

  • @lacassassin0072
    @lacassassin0072 4 года назад +611

    Nanny McFee: ‘The sperm is transferred into the woman’
    Daz: ‘Ok I’ll eat that later....’

  • @kelseylol3864
    @kelseylol3864 4 года назад +696

    “He’s just sitting there in the corner like BeNd HeR oVeR”
    Me: falls off bed from laughing too hard 😂😂😂

    • @gamingreviews1683
      @gamingreviews1683 4 года назад +1

      Literally me rn

    • @lunaris6769
      @lunaris6769 4 года назад +6

      I have two kittens on my stomach and I cant laugh or they will fall off halp

    • @depressionhasenteredthecha138
      @depressionhasenteredthecha138 4 года назад

      I cant laugh cause then ill wake everyone up in my house

    • @arcdeep
      @arcdeep 4 года назад +1

      Kelsey O'Neal I’m laughing so hard

    • @luvelytune
      @luvelytune 4 года назад

      Kelsey O'Neal me tooo

  • @justsomegothgirl
    @justsomegothgirl 2 года назад +2

    This perfectly captures the embarrassment and awkwardness of your parents giving you "the talk". My talk also included a lot of religious stuff... Also that AIDS video has so much inaccurate information, like seriously.

  • @rubymae4268
    @rubymae4268 4 года назад +279

    I’m surprised she didn’t just talk about the “special kiss that make someone pregnant “ with the way she’s bloody going on ahahahh😂😂

  • @Meeach
    @Meeach 4 года назад +4045

    BRITISH PEOPLE ONLY:
    Does that sausage roll beat a Greggs sausage roll tho?

    • @delyzium
      @delyzium 4 года назад +82

      MitchTheLich not possible

    • @sleepysnakey7399
      @sleepysnakey7399 4 года назад +194

      greggs sausage rolls will forever be superior
      how dare you suggest otherwise

    • @bubblessmartiez197
      @bubblessmartiez197 4 года назад +11

      Greggs is awful

    • @owl7239
      @owl7239 4 года назад +80

      Greggs the bestt

    • @cornishchickens6778
      @cornishchickens6778 4 года назад +18

      @@sleepysnakey7399 u guys tried a cornish pasty or sausage roll?

  • @Twisted_tv
    @Twisted_tv 4 года назад +473

    “I don’t wanna talk about growing up, you weird old lady.”
    🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @hopeabel3766
    @hopeabel3766 3 года назад +18

    The way he put down his food when she started talk got me dying 😂✨💀💀

  • @tpwksusan3135
    @tpwksusan3135 4 года назад +647

    Daz: “maybe if you weren’t wearing your CURTAINS your husband might do more”

  • @teagan4945
    @teagan4945 4 года назад +476

    “Slippery?... she’s not an ice rink..”
    Wow- 😭😂

  • @endermanza2596
    @endermanza2596 3 года назад +3035

    Old woman: The woman is getting ready to receive the sperm
    Daz: Yeah she’s like this **opens mouth**

    • @kelleyjones1068
      @kelleyjones1068 3 года назад +22

      Lol

    • @sgmylovee
      @sgmylovee 3 года назад +13

      That's sus😂

    • @minddoctor11
      @minddoctor11 2 года назад +1

      I know

    • @biggiecheese26
      @biggiecheese26 2 года назад

      @@sgmylovee Per regulation 274.35, subsection 1356-2 of the Unbreakable Regulation Arrangement of Countries Undergoing Nasty Trends, or U.R.A.C.U.N.T., you have been found to be currently engaging in an act of dead meme-ry. You are therefore required to, and without delay, remove said offensive meme or suffer the consequence of forever being convicted as a T.W.A.T., or Twit Wasting Air and Time.
      This is your first and FINAL warning.

    • @alexisskoll7339
      @alexisskoll7339 2 года назад +3

      @@biggiecheese26 wow

  • @JadeC2468
    @JadeC2468 День назад +1

    "Well, I guess you just have to be prepared to die" IS WILD💀💀💀

  • @Chef_boiarded
    @Chef_boiarded 4 года назад +1424

    “Using a condom is like Russian roulette”

  • @melsfiredrill2740
    @melsfiredrill2740 4 года назад +11943

    I have a relationship with my bed. We sleep together every night

    • @MyNameIsConnor1991
      @MyNameIsConnor1991 4 года назад +155

      Lmfao

    • @calix3062
      @calix3062 4 года назад +111

      Y e s

    • @ravioli726
      @ravioli726 4 года назад +332

      Me and my bed sleep all day and all night if I'm lucky ;)

    • @User-ni4wn
      @User-ni4wn 4 года назад +168

      Me and my bed cuddle with each other for hours it’s such a nice bed 😌

    • @lillianhippe8990
      @lillianhippe8990 4 года назад +42

      Gacha Girl Nova same it’s not even at night it’s both day and night 😂

  • @MOCHI_DWAYNE
    @MOCHI_DWAYNE 2 года назад +3

    RIGHT AS THE LADY SAID "how would you get AIDS in your body"
    I got an ad with a kid that was like "CRAFT MAC AND CHEESE"

  • @lynnelee5517
    @lynnelee5517 4 года назад +410

    "Everything is based on love."
    "Then you haven't been to the club then have you lady?"
    *I'm dead.* 🤣☠🤣
    7:16 *double dead* 😂🤣😂🤣
    (Please do more sex videos Daz!)

  • @c.mat0
    @c.mat0 4 года назад +977

    “GOD AINT GONNA TELL ME HOW TO LAY IT DOWN IS HE” I’m actually dying 😂😂

    • @katiemcdonald547
      @katiemcdonald547 4 года назад +1

      I read this right before he said this😂

    • @sonnyskiess9355
      @sonnyskiess9355 4 года назад

      Katie Mcdonald same it's just as I got to this point 😂😭

    • @kate2003
      @kate2003 4 года назад

      Ceri Sian it happened to me again : I read this comment whilst he said it 😮 😆

    • @heytame
      @heytame 4 года назад

      Same Katie Mcdonald

    • @Chlooo.e
      @Chlooo.e 4 года назад

      I made it 444 :3

  • @L1ttlefawnn
    @L1ttlefawnn 3 года назад +3994

    "This is the best sausage I've ever had🤤"
    *cries in dirty mind*

  • @sisser8565
    @sisser8565 3 года назад +13

    "I guess you'll have to be prepared to die"...
    That sentence made me laugh so hard, that I almost peed myself 🤣

  • @zofia1352
    @zofia1352 4 года назад +315

    “The only changes in my body are my stomach going outwards” I felt that on an emotional level 😂

    • @lililyy
      @lililyy 4 года назад +5

      abdominal level*
      im sorry im so sorry lmao

  • @mursu1286
    @mursu1286 4 года назад +348

    "Maybe your husband might give you more if you weren't wearing YOUR CURTAINS"
    I'm actually choking rn

  • @joonbloom
    @joonbloom 4 года назад +232

    "well maybe if you weren't wearing your *CURTAINS* your husband might do more" I AM CRYING

    • @cleetusbartholomew
      @cleetusbartholomew 4 года назад +3

      joonbloom your profile picture is adorable

    • @astr035
      @astr035 4 года назад +1

      I love the fact that so many armys watch his videos

    • @jazzy8931
      @jazzy8931 4 года назад

      yess armys ☺

    • @joonbloom
      @joonbloom 4 года назад

      @@cleetusbartholomew thank u !!

    • @joonbloom
      @joonbloom 4 года назад

      @@astr035

  • @ziggyz3629
    @ziggyz3629 2 года назад +9

    "That's depressing love, yah, maybe if you weren't wearing your CURTAINS, your husband might do more"

  • @sarahlampkin7044
    @sarahlampkin7044 4 года назад +811

    I died as soon as the woman said “erect”

    • @clutchgaming6123
      @clutchgaming6123 4 года назад +3

      Sarah Lampkin omg same

    • @speedz3420
      @speedz3420 4 года назад +4

      Wait if you died how are you typing?!

    • @ireion3209
      @ireion3209 4 года назад +5

      @@speedz3420 r/whooooosh

    • @inhle1688
      @inhle1688 4 года назад +5

      Sarah Lampkin daz eating the sausage roll made that so much funnier for me

    • @thatoneamputee
      @thatoneamputee 4 года назад +3

      @@inhle1688 yes. I almost died laughing

  • @jamiehay1027
    @jamiehay1027 4 года назад +203

    *Daz:* "This is the best sausage roll ever!"
    *Greggs:* "You have chosen death"

    • @olive6525
      @olive6525 4 года назад +6

      I've seen you on a Daz video before I think it was last year

    • @unianetwork
      @unianetwork 4 года назад +2

      I've seen you

  • @jadetyler1543
    @jadetyler1543 4 года назад +774

    Lady: "the womans body is getting ready to receive the sperm."
    Daz: "yea, shes like this 😲"
    I- I wasnt ready for that😂

  • @shsjskdjd
    @shsjskdjd 2 года назад +5

    Right after 11:31 I got a ad saying “by having a iPhone” 😂😂

  • @riofart
    @riofart 4 года назад +1184

    “sO iT cAn EaSiLy sLiP iN aNd OuT . nO tRoUbLe”

  • @boku23_edits3
    @boku23_edits3 4 года назад +2732

    Video: **Talking about sex education**
    Daz: **Eating sausage rolls**
    Daz: “JESUS THIS SAUSAGE ROLL IS SO GOOD”
    😂😂😂😂😂

    • @robin-wy3hq
      @robin-wy3hq 4 года назад +10

      i- LOL

    • @jasonmann1958
      @jasonmann1958 4 года назад +8

      @@robin-wy3hq stfu

    • @rane293
      @rane293 4 года назад +1

      jason mann ikr

    • @willwill5017
      @willwill5017 4 года назад +3

      Why has that comment got 200+ likes 2020 cant get anymore fucked

    • @jazfromyt
      @jazfromyt 4 года назад +2

      Glizzy gobbler

  • @jamiem9843
    @jamiem9843 4 года назад +4927

    This reminds me of "if you have sex, you will get pregnant, and die"

    • @cornycollins5867
      @cornycollins5867 4 года назад +170

      Don't do it in the missionary position, don't do it standing up, just... don't do it.

    • @keebofan4002
      @keebofan4002 4 года назад +99

      Jamie M i saw this one video- “what if you Decide that you wanna have sex before you get married?” “well i guess you just have to be prepared to die.” lmao i just thought i should share this

    • @taliamccaig3744
      @taliamccaig3744 4 года назад +10

      oml yes!

    • @ChelsyLolaa
      @ChelsyLolaa 4 года назад +5

      hahaha

    • @user-hp6nm9rz5d
      @user-hp6nm9rz5d 4 года назад +18

      Jamie M if y know Aphmau u will get this:
      Kissing leads to babies and death

  • @CloverASMR.
    @CloverASMR. 2 года назад +6

    This is the cherry on top of comedy
    Best part of this was Daz's laughter over the "thanks for watching" screen 👉👌

  • @emmawebb194
    @emmawebb194 4 года назад +263

    me: *clicks on daz’s new video*
    me: “yess i can’t wait”
    daz: *eating a sausage roll*
    me:” i already know that this video is amazing

  • @Sam-xe2bz
    @Sam-xe2bz 4 года назад +413

    “She’s in the nursing home now!” I CACKLED

  • @robynkuka4940
    @robynkuka4940 4 года назад +450

    teacher: talks about love
    daz: *pulls out sausage roll* this is love

    • @janesuddenlyseymour7813
      @janesuddenlyseymour7813 4 года назад +1

      *starts chanting I LOVE SAUSAGE ROLLS *

    • @avastars3393
      @avastars3393 4 года назад +1

      @@janesuddenlyseymour7813 lol I can never eat a sausage again😂😂😂

    • @doggo9421
      @doggo9421 4 года назад +1

      This is why I relate to daz

  • @baronvonbatz05
    @baronvonbatz05 6 месяцев назад +1

    That Health video was a nightmare. She wants every student to die after they do the birds and the bees like seriously what are their parents is gonna react to this in the 80s or the 90s

  • @um8riley869
    @um8riley869 4 года назад +192

    new people join the channel for the first time
    Daz: “ThIs Is ThE BeSt SaUsAge RoLl”
    Them: “Okey dokey”