I very much like the analogy with the cup of energy. I'll say a cup of generosity. You can't be generous if you don't have anything in your cup of generosity left. If you want to be generous you have to constantly refuel your cup of generosity and that happens when you stand on for your self.
if you only knew :) that there is literally nothing hold me back and I got a lot of resources to work with now that I cut everybody like that out of my life.
Yeah. Either NYC is holdingme back or I am not capturing the right way...if you live in NYC hit me up. Lets work on something or at least let photograph or interview you
Brilliantly analyzed Wenzes. INFJs, just like any other type, are here to thrive, not just survive. I have been living in fear, survival mode and extreme isolation for the past 10 years, feeling like i was lost in a vast desert. Looking back, it was a necessary experience, it had a use. The bulk of that time was spent gobbling down knowledge, learning about myself, learning about the world, coming up with my own understandings and definitions of the meaning of life, healing past wounds and traumas. Now, i am a completely different entity. I see the bigger picture, i have a healthy self-concept, i understand the world, i have worked on my self-sabotaging tendencies and traumas. I have made friends with myself, i have made friends with the world. Because of this, i can go out and about bereft of fear. I am in overflow, i am in excitement, i am in clarity. That 10 years had a lot of confusion, frustration and grey days. I understand it better by looking at it as a key part of a developmental phase. Like the way a caterpillar has to dwell in the cocoon for a time before it becomes a butterfly. The 10 years was my cocoon phase. INFJs are innately shamans. We are here to do shamanic work in the world, to heal the world, to enable its balance. But we cannot do that until we ourselves are fully refined, clear and solid on the inside. We cannot do that until we understand this mission, and how to apply our unique skills, talents and interests to it, in our own particular ways. My suspicion is that INFJs have to go through this stage if they will ever get to stand in their full power. I have seen similar examples and instances happening with older INFJs around me, even if they didn't have the language for it. The fact that our societies do not have this understanding means a lot of INFJs are left to go through this process on their own, with no one helping them, guiding them, or even understanding them. Pre-modern societies had it. Shamanism was a recognized institution, older shamans helped guide the younger ones, helped them refine their powers, helped them harness their energies. This is not there today, you only get it in glimpses in certain TV shows and movies such as X-Men, Harry Potter, etc. The lack of this in modern society is why a lot of spiritual eruptions and awakenings are treated as madness, deviance, and aberrations. And so a lot of healers just perish on the path. This is why the world is in such a bad place today.
I died . . . . I was in an accident, and, they told me, there was very little chance of making it. Since surviving, and dealing with ptsd, and Covid. I not only learned I was an INFJ, but I learned the life I was living, was not the life meant for me. I made myself small to cater to everyone else. And I realized, if I stayed dead. I would of died having a miserable life. Now? I give myself the things I need. Self care are the step stones that grant self worth, which gives, self love. And in that, you learn to give yourself alone time. You learn to say no. You learn that some people are worth helping, more than those that abusive. So that you learn, that when you are helping someone. You can give it your 150 percent, while still having enough energy for yourself, and your own needs, and your own want. And only after I set my life straight. Quitting an abusive relationship, ending friendships that were toxic. Started sleeping more. Exercising more. Recharging more. And working more. I have never felt more love in my life (and only afterwards I found your videos!) and a lot of what you say rings true
Holy crap! Yes, growing up in a narcissistic household. I was the blacksheep of the family. So I was the one taught to basically ignore her needs and put myself last. Now, I am seeing how I played small all my life because I was afraid of outshining and outdoing others. I became a martyr! Now, I see the truth. I am no longer doing that anymore, I am first!
It's almost like if we as INFJ's have a goal, there are these extraverted things we have to do to accomplish the goal. We find them to be annoying because we have to step out of our head and we have to do all these steps we don't want to do, including talk to people, etc. So then we look for affirmation from others that this is really worth all the effort. But in order to get this affirmation, we have to tell someone our goals. No one ever understands our goals and why we want to do what we want to do. So instead of getting an affirmation, we end up being discouraged and that causes us to lose a tremendous amount of energy and motivation. We end up hating people and seeing them as useless because they never give us the needed affirmation and support we crave. We end up getting affirmation for why we don't like to talk to people in the first place. This seems to be where I live - in!
I agree with a lot of what you say here but I am happy to report that there can be others who understand and encourage us with our goals once we become friends with intuitive types - for me the INFJ's, INTP's and INFP's in my life are so priceless! A number of years back I started an INFJ Meetup group in my city and met some INFJ's that way but I have also become an "intuitives magnet" :) I wish you the best, and don't give up on manifesting your soul tribe into your life!
@@time_to_sleep12 Yes, I have not been so good at being a Sigma, not needing validation and figuring out how to do things on my own. I hope that changes in me. That and perhaps like Samadhi the Oracle said finding intuitive types to be friends with may also work for me!
Yes that's where I an now/ survival mode,absolutely dry,desperately silently screaming for some time for myself to recover s little bit,have been like this for 2 years,trying not to sink,keeping my head above the water.
I know she is very correct. My grandma recently got very sick almost bedridden for the past 3 years and so I, my mom and bro been taking care of her. I am in my early 20s also unemployed. Extremely depressed too so one day I told my bro that I feel sad (depressed) and that I am in pain and he jokingly said a pain that is not visible is not a pain at all. And a few days back I was having extreme period pain (I also have pmdd) and told my mum about it and she said my pain is not bigger than my grandma's. I get where this is coming from but now I know that if you don't look at yourself first noone is ever gonna do that for u. Take care of them but at the same time don't ignore ur needs. It's important to acknowledge that you'll face many invalidations in life and it's fine, we gotta hold ourselves up and move on. Being stuck in the movement and thinking too much about it is a waste of our potential. Acknowledge yourself, know yourself and do what u must for yourself cause honey no one else will. U think and do everything for them, thats just who we are but it's not important that they'll do the same for u. So don't ignore yourself, don't lose you.
I've definitely outgrown the space I am in and felt compassion fatigue. I refuse to be held back any further and starting to take more tangible steps to my best self.
Do I feel like I have all this potential but something is holding me back? Yes. It's that "survival mode" you mentioned. I have been in that mode more so at work than in my personal life. Yet, I am currently doing something about that right now. More news to come real soon. Hopefully it's good news.
Hey I’m and INFJ-A and this really helped cause I realized that my fear for change is what is holding me back from my potential, but I’m going to make this year my year and achieve my dream of becoming a singer.
Excellent points! I don't mind rejection if I am convinced that I'm right. I grew up in a very manipulative environment and I was more confused than a feather in a whirlwind. A big part of what you're talking about is how infj's can become victims of narcissistic and gaslighting abuse and they can truly believe that doing the right thing is the wrong thing. They may believe they are morally compromised when they use their strengths and stand up for themselves when they see how it hurts their loved ones. That was me anyway. A big challenge for me has been navigating this path with love for those in my circle. I know this channel isn't necessarily religious but you can do the right thing in a hatefull spirit and that will come back to bite you. Stay humble.
So true, I used to lower myself so others would feel comfortable. I've recently learned that this stemmed from my fear of rejection and I was inadvertently being manipulative and patronizing by not being myself with others. Ultimately, I'm on a path of self-discovery and other people's opinions of me are none of my business. I can only be the best version of myself. I hope anyone who goes through this also finds some clarity in their life. 🥰
As an INFJ-T, have been keeping up with your content for a while now and have found it really invaluable. Currently working on recognizing/undoing negative thought/behavioural patterns which has and will probably continue to take time to achieve but really related to this topic from where I'm at right now. Still have anxieties, which might be a natural part of the process, but you've really articulated the feeling of where I'm at in this moment and it's incredibly reaffirming so wanted to say thank you!💛 (Today's been a particularly good day for me so feels serendipitous how relatable this video was and honestly unsure how I'll feel in a day or a week, etc. However, it's a great comfort knowing that, if necessary, I can reflect on what you've said here and maintain/restore the good place I feel I'm at in at this moment)
Thank you soooo much! It has been so noisy in my head. Everything you have shared is so enlightening particularly the survival mode, making myself small and expansion. More power! 🌺
You are also right my entire life everybody else and their needs as always come before my own always so this will be my season for me tap into me and just me for a season of time. After all I matter just as much as everyone else does. Thank you for this video I appreciate it have an awesome day.
I'm glad this was brought up because although success is different for everybody, anything I had a vision for rarely came to fruition and I don't understand it. I could never understand what I was missing or doing wrong. I'm glad I'm not alone. As far as being this way in relationships I learned this early on. An almost 11 year relationship I was in when I was younger was keeping myself small. I get the wanting to leave all this space for them to grow and help them with their problems and being patient and sacrificing my own happiness because in the end I thought I would be appreciated for it. Well if backfired in my face. There wasn't anything more selfless I could do for this person. It was never enough. So I learned my happiness would be just as important if not more in the next relationship.
I thank you so so much. You helped me today so much. I am also an immigrant that lives in Germany. I had so bad conditions to thrive in live at school (I became very good at the end like you did), but I managed it to study at a very good university in Germany - but a few years ago I just fell becaus nobody was thinking as I did. I know that I am very intelligent and very very courious about like everything but the normal life just exhausts me. Also feeling responsible for my family always held me so much back. I dont know who I am. Today I wished for answers what my next steps should be and to understand myself better and than you showed up :) Right now I am crying becaus I finally feel understood and know what to do sort of...
🎯 completely every single word absolutely holds true for me!! Even though I have not made nearly the progress in doing this that I want to, when I do take small steps in doing so, it literally feels like I am busting out of some sort of shell!! It is truly helpful to hear it spoken out loud! 🤟👍😃
When a goldfish grows into a big fish and out grows its bowl, expansion is necessary. True friends will be happy for you the others will show their true selves
This one can be pretty difficult to digest for some, because it only gives a perspective to constantly maintain self-balance. That is a constant battle all life. Assertives will find this easier, but Turbulent ones will struggle in this more (I'm a turbulent). At this point I have even created my own 3 pointers that I could understand. It's much more abstractal than your 5 Pillars, but I just felt more comfortable with it as a turbulent. Even drew an artwork around it. "Self, Awareness, and Balance". Anyone who's Ni senses can find comfort around it, would naturally relate to everything in life.
I am sure a lot of people will identify with this one. I certainly did. This habit of "making ourselves small" was a big part of my childhood, spurred on by being made to feel that it was egotistical and selfish to want something for ourselves- it all had to do with thinking about "others" in general and "someone else" in particular - and who was "someone else?" Anyone but me. I questioned this as a kid, but was afraid to do much about it. However, as an adult I learned that something could be done about it. It was emotionally hard to do at times. I did a lot of the changing in my pre-Myers-Briggs days - taking by faith that my choices were okay, and relying on my intuition - which was also not encouraged in the culture I grew up in. Fast forward to now, and it's great to realize that most of my choices back then were right - in fact even when I made mistakes, I knew that (1) I could learn from them (2) they usually weren't as serious as I thought they were and (3) I actually did have the innate wisdom to learn and grow - in spite of what I'd been led to believe before. This is why I thoroughly appreciate when you share your experiences of learning to live the Epic Life. It confirms so much! 🙂
I hate to admit that from the beginning I somehow knew I wasn't gonna be successful as I can become.....time has passed,it sometimes really depresses me(really bad). Somehow I manage to stay afloat,keep my sanity and most importantly MY HAPPYNESS....but some people enjoy comparing themselves to me in order to feel superior in a materialistic way. I'm not willing to engage into an arms race with anyone where instead of accumulating nuclear weapons they accumulate mechanical toys!!! Unfortunately it's become evident most women are truly attracted to that. It's like a true alpha male is in reality a self-centered 13 year old.......IT REALLY SUCKS WHEN THE WOMAN YOU FALL FOR ENDS UP BEING A NARCISSIST.
I know exactly how you feel bro. It was mainly close family members that were making it hard for me. I distanced myself first,, then about a year or more later, discovered and learned about the INFJ personality type and FINALLY things made sense. It's all still brand new to me though,,, I only known about it and started learning all about it about 5 or 6 weeks ago
@@josephsarvis don't know if you're referring to my comment.... But I can tell you I also found out recently about personality classification. But in reality I don't care much for the INFJ brand. I used to proudly describe myself as an INFJ..... IT WAS A SHORTLIVED HIGH. Realized most people don't care or don't know what it means and even worst, some people use that information against you to when engaging in emotional warfare.I advice to keep this to yourself.I believe no difference will ever be noticeable when anyone finds their type of personality. A really bright and welcomed advantage is that now I find myself meeting liked minded people I can open up to in places such as here, in the u tube INFJ channels. Ok bro. This is part of my view. I'm actually thinking of creating either a short film or,book dealing with INFJ s in a subtle way.....ok too long of a reply. Laters bro.
Wenzes, it's a no wonder why some people feel like you're talking just about them. 😊 how could you possibly know the most innermost thoughts of my mind the way you do?😅 I got to be honest, sometimes it makes me feel so mediocre to think that someone else could know so much about me without knowing me. But you seem to do that. And that's not an insult. But it does make me wonder very hard anyway, you're the best. And I am so grateful for you. You're helping to help me understand myself and why I think and do the things I do. Much love and understanding❤❤.😊😊😊😂❤
Do INFJs talk with their hands a lot like you do because my mom is always telling me along with other family members that I talk with my hands too much just wondering thank you
Again you seemed to make a video just for me. You even used my sign lol; and ya know my name and my sign are the same. :P You keep me coming back for more and I like that about you, thanks.
Wenzes, you are the second person, the fifth creature and the eighth tree, I am madly in love with this morning. Your eyes are so beautiful, I'm amazed how well they see me. You, young lady, are amazing ☺️
INFJ thoughts: Its ironic that you are reaching out with life coaching and RUclips videos to the smallest and rarest group of people. True that we put others before ourselves, thanks though.
I once had a woman i knew kill herself, But before she did she came to me, and I told her that her cat had 3 months to live. I then tried to tell her family her friends her mental health and nobody belived me that I extended her 3 more months, I promnised somebody would care and in the end, it was only me. Boy did that one hurt when I found out.
2 Kings 20 King James Version 20 In those days was Hezekiah sick unto death. And the prophet Isaiah the son of Amoz came to him, and said unto him, Thus saith the Lord, Set thine house in order; for thou shalt die, and not live. 2 Then he turned his face to the wall, and prayed unto the Lord, saying, 3 I beseech thee, O Lord, remember now how I have walked before thee in truth and with a perfect heart, and have done that which is good in thy sight. And Hezekiah wept sore. 4 And it came to pass, afore Isaiah was gone out into the middle court, that the word of the Lord came to him, saying, 5 Turn again, and tell Hezekiah the captain of my people, Thus saith the Lord, the God of David thy father, I have heard thy prayer, I have seen thy tears: behold, I will heal thee: on the third day thou shalt go up unto the house of the Lord. 6 And I will add unto thy days fifteen years; and I will deliver thee and this city out of the hand of the king of Assyria; and I will defend this city for mine own sake, and for my servant David's sake. 7 And Isaiah said, Take a lump of figs. And they took and laid it on the boil, and he recovered. 8 And Hezekiah said unto Isaiah, What shall be the sign that the Lord will heal me, and that I shall go up into the house of the Lord the third day? 9 And Isaiah said, This sign shalt thou have of the Lord, that the Lord will do the thing that he hath spoken: shall the shadow go forward ten degrees, or go back ten degrees? 10 And Hezekiah answered, It is a light thing for the shadow to go down ten degrees: nay, but let the shadow return backward ten degrees. 11 And Isaiah the prophet cried unto the Lord: and he brought the shadow ten degrees backward, by which it had gone down in the dial of Ahaz. 12 At that time Berodachbaladan, the son of Baladan, king of Babylon, sent letters and a present unto Hezekiah: for he had heard that Hezekiah had been sick. 13 And Hezekiah hearkened unto them, and shewed them all the house of his precious things, the silver, and the gold, and the spices, and the precious ointment, and all the house of his armour, and all that was found in his treasures: there was nothing in his house, nor in all his dominion, that Hezekiah shewed them not. 14 Then came Isaiah the prophet unto king Hezekiah, and said unto him, What said these men? and from whence came they unto thee? And Hezekiah said, They are come from a far country, even from Babylon. 15 And he said, What have they seen in thine house? And Hezekiah answered, All the things that are in mine house have they seen: there is nothing among my treasures that I have not shewed them. 16 And Isaiah said unto Hezekiah, Hear the word of the Lord. 17 Behold, the days come, that all that is in thine house, and that which thy fathers have laid up in store unto this day, shall be carried into Babylon: nothing shall be left, saith the Lord. 18 And of thy sons that shall issue from thee, which thou shalt beget, shall they take away; and they shall be eunuchs in the palace of the king of Babylon. 19 Then said Hezekiah unto Isaiah, Good is the word of the Lord which thou hast spoken. And he said, Is it not good, if peace and truth be in my days? 20 And the rest of the acts of Hezekiah, and all his might, and how he made a pool, and a conduit, and brought water into the city, are they not written in the book of the chronicles of the kings of Judah? 21 And Hezekiah slept with his fathers: and Manasseh his son reigned in his stead.
less judgement and moronic standards and none of that, "meh i judge you because you did this good or bad thing but hang on, let's make sure we support animal testing because nothing matters and that makes me better than everyone else" LoL
Absolutely, but now that I've let go of so much of the past, I feel limitless, other than my lack of money. I'm ready to move forward, but financially I'm stuck... It sucks. I very recently had to drop things with my twin flame, because it became unhealthy and wasn't progressing forward at all. If anything, it was regressive and toxic. So, I had to cut off giving all my energy to that situation, and had to focus on myself, and stop worrying about her, and since I've done that, I feel 1000x better than I did. I still love her and care about her, but if she's not going to put any efforts into keeping me around, then I'm out! ✌🏼 If she wants to make things right, she's got a long way to go to convince me that I mean as much to her, as she does to me. Until then, I'm moving forward...Meeting new people...Maybe even go on a few dates, and might even mess around and get into a healthy relationship. Who knows? But I am excited about the new year, for the first time in pretty much forever... Positive vibes, positive thoughts, and good things are coming in 2022! 🤙🏼
Do you feel like you have all this potential but something is holding you back?
I very much like the analogy with the cup of energy. I'll say a cup of generosity. You can't be generous if you don't have anything in your cup of generosity left. If you want to be generous you have to constantly refuel your cup of generosity and that happens when you stand on for your self.
Oh my God yes
if you only knew :) that there is literally nothing hold me back and I got a lot of resources to work with now that I cut everybody like that out of my life.
Yeah. Either NYC is holdingme back or I am not capturing the right way...if you live in NYC hit me up. Lets work on something or at least let photograph or interview you
@@simovtransportmedia1137 so much true
Brilliantly analyzed Wenzes. INFJs, just like any other type, are here to thrive, not just survive. I have been living in fear, survival mode and extreme isolation for the past 10 years, feeling like i was lost in a vast desert. Looking back, it was a necessary experience, it had a use. The bulk of that time was spent gobbling down knowledge, learning about myself, learning about the world, coming up with my own understandings and definitions of the meaning of life, healing past wounds and traumas. Now, i am a completely different entity. I see the bigger picture, i have a healthy self-concept, i understand the world, i have worked on my self-sabotaging tendencies and traumas. I have made friends with myself, i have made friends with the world. Because of this, i can go out and about bereft of fear. I am in overflow, i am in excitement, i am in clarity. That 10 years had a lot of confusion, frustration and grey days. I understand it better by looking at it as a key part of a developmental phase. Like the way a caterpillar has to dwell in the cocoon for a time before it becomes a butterfly. The 10 years was my cocoon phase.
INFJs are innately shamans. We are here to do shamanic work in the world, to heal the world, to enable its balance. But we cannot do that until we ourselves are fully refined, clear and solid on the inside. We cannot do that until we understand this mission, and how to apply our unique skills, talents and interests to it, in our own particular ways. My suspicion is that INFJs have to go through this stage if they will ever get to stand in their full power. I have seen similar examples and instances happening with older INFJs around me, even if they didn't have the language for it.
The fact that our societies do not have this understanding means a lot of INFJs are left to go through this process on their own, with no one helping them, guiding them, or even understanding them. Pre-modern societies had it. Shamanism was a recognized institution, older shamans helped guide the younger ones, helped them refine their powers, helped them harness their energies. This is not there today, you only get it in glimpses in certain TV shows and movies such as X-Men, Harry Potter, etc. The lack of this in modern society is why a lot of spiritual eruptions and awakenings are treated as madness, deviance, and aberrations. And so a lot of healers just perish on the path. This is why the world is in such a bad place today.
I died . . . . I was in an accident, and, they told me, there was very little chance of making it. Since surviving, and dealing with ptsd, and Covid. I not only learned I was an INFJ, but I learned the life I was living, was not the life meant for me. I made myself small to cater to everyone else. And I realized, if I stayed dead. I would of died having a miserable life.
Now? I give myself the things I need. Self care are the step stones that grant self worth, which gives, self love. And in that, you learn to give yourself alone time. You learn to say no. You learn that some people are worth helping, more than those that abusive. So that you learn, that when you are helping someone. You can give it your 150 percent, while still having enough energy for yourself, and your own needs, and your own want.
And only after I set my life straight. Quitting an abusive relationship, ending friendships that were toxic. Started sleeping more. Exercising more. Recharging more. And working more. I have never felt more love in my life (and only afterwards I found your videos!) and a lot of what you say rings true
Holy crap! Yes, growing up in a narcissistic household. I was the blacksheep of the family. So I was the one taught to basically ignore her needs and put myself last. Now, I am seeing how I played small all my life because I was afraid of outshining and outdoing others. I became a martyr! Now, I see the truth. I am no longer doing that anymore, I am first!
It's almost like if we as INFJ's have a goal, there are these extraverted things we have to do to accomplish the goal. We find them to be annoying because we have to step out of our head and we have to do all these steps we don't want to do, including talk to people, etc. So then we look for affirmation from others that this is really worth all the effort. But in order to get this affirmation, we have to tell someone our goals. No one ever understands our goals and why we want to do what we want to do. So instead of getting an affirmation, we end up being discouraged and that causes us to lose a tremendous amount of energy and motivation. We end up hating people and seeing them as useless because they never give us the needed affirmation and support we crave. We end up getting affirmation for why we don't like to talk to people in the first place. This seems to be where I live - in!
I agree with a lot of what you say here but I am happy to report that there can be others who understand and encourage us with our goals once we become friends with intuitive types - for me the INFJ's, INTP's and INFP's in my life are so priceless! A number of years back I started an INFJ Meetup group in my city and met some INFJ's that way but I have also become an "intuitives magnet" :) I wish you the best, and don't give up on manifesting your soul tribe into your life!
Yes! I recently felt like (and for awhile) that “I don’t like people anymore” for this very reason!
thats why we are lone wolfs ,warriors. your only supporter , power comes from your innerself . not others.
@@time_to_sleep12 Yes, I have not been so good at being a Sigma, not needing validation and figuring out how to do things on my own. I hope that changes in me. That and perhaps like Samadhi the Oracle said finding intuitive types to be friends with may also work for me!
Yes that's where I an now/ survival mode,absolutely dry,desperately silently screaming for some time for myself to recover s little bit,have been like this for 2 years,trying not to sink,keeping my head above the water.
I know she is very correct. My grandma recently got very sick almost bedridden for the past 3 years and so I, my mom and bro been taking care of her. I am in my early 20s also unemployed. Extremely depressed too so one day I told my bro that I feel sad (depressed) and that I am in pain and he jokingly said a pain that is not visible is not a pain at all. And a few days back I was having extreme period pain (I also have pmdd) and told my mum about it and she said my pain is not bigger than my grandma's. I get where this is coming from but now I know that if you don't look at yourself first noone is ever gonna do that for u. Take care of them but at the same time don't ignore ur needs. It's important to acknowledge that you'll face many invalidations in life and it's fine, we gotta hold ourselves up and move on. Being stuck in the movement and thinking too much about it is a waste of our potential. Acknowledge yourself, know yourself and do what u must for yourself cause honey no one else will. U think and do everything for them, thats just who we are but it's not important that they'll do the same for u. So don't ignore yourself, don't lose you.
I've definitely outgrown the space I am in and felt compassion fatigue. I refuse to be held back any further and starting to take more tangible steps to my best self.
Do I feel like I have all this potential but something is holding me back? Yes. It's that "survival mode" you mentioned. I have been in that mode more so at work than in my personal life. Yet, I am currently doing something about that right now. More news to come real soon. Hopefully it's good news.
Hey I’m and INFJ-A and this really helped cause I realized that my fear for change is what is holding me back from my potential, but I’m going to make this year my year and achieve my dream of becoming a singer.
Excellent points! I don't mind rejection if I am convinced that I'm right. I grew up in a very manipulative environment and I was more confused than a feather in a whirlwind. A big part of what you're talking about is how infj's can become victims of narcissistic and gaslighting abuse and they can truly believe that doing the right thing is the wrong thing. They may believe they are morally compromised when they use their strengths and stand up for themselves when they see how it hurts their loved ones. That was me anyway. A big challenge for me has been navigating this path with love for those in my circle. I know this channel isn't necessarily religious but you can do the right thing in a hatefull spirit and that will come back to bite you. Stay humble.
So true, I used to lower myself so others would feel comfortable. I've recently learned that this stemmed from my fear of rejection and I was inadvertently being manipulative and patronizing by not being myself with others. Ultimately, I'm on a path of self-discovery and other people's opinions of me are none of my business. I can only be the best version of myself. I hope anyone who goes through this also finds some clarity in their life. 🥰
As an INFJ-T, have been keeping up with your content for a while now and have found it really invaluable. Currently working on recognizing/undoing negative thought/behavioural patterns which has and will probably continue to take time to achieve but really related to this topic from where I'm at right now. Still have anxieties, which might be a natural part of the process, but you've really articulated the feeling of where I'm at in this moment and it's incredibly reaffirming so wanted to say thank you!💛 (Today's been a particularly good day for me so feels serendipitous how relatable this video was and honestly unsure how I'll feel in a day or a week, etc. However, it's a great comfort knowing that, if necessary, I can reflect on what you've said here and maintain/restore the good place I feel I'm at in at this moment)
Thank you soooo much! It has been so noisy in my head. Everything you have shared is so enlightening particularly the survival mode, making myself small and expansion. More power! 🌺
You are also right my entire life everybody else and their needs as always come before my own always so this will be my season for me tap into me and just me for a season of time. After all I matter just as much as everyone else does. Thank you for this video I appreciate it have an awesome day.
I'm glad this was brought up because although success is different for everybody, anything I had a vision for rarely came to fruition and I don't understand it. I could never understand what I was missing or doing wrong. I'm glad I'm not alone. As far as being this way in relationships I learned this early on. An almost 11 year relationship I was in when I was younger was keeping myself small. I get the wanting to leave all this space for them to grow and help them with their problems and being patient and sacrificing my own happiness because in the end I thought I would be appreciated for it. Well if backfired in my face. There wasn't anything more selfless I could do for this person. It was never enough. So I learned my happiness would be just as important if not more in the next relationship.
I thank you so so much. You helped me today so much. I am also an immigrant that lives in Germany. I had so bad conditions to thrive in live at school (I became very good at the end like you did), but I managed it to study at a very good university in Germany - but a few years ago I just fell becaus nobody was thinking as I did. I know that I am very intelligent and very very courious about like everything but the normal life just exhausts me. Also feeling responsible for my family always held me so much back. I dont know who I am. Today I wished for answers what my next steps should be and to understand myself better and than you showed up :) Right now I am crying becaus I finally feel understood and know what to do sort of...
🎯 completely every single word absolutely holds true for me!! Even though I have not made nearly the progress in doing this that I want to, when I do take small steps in doing so, it literally feels like I am busting out of some sort of shell!! It is truly helpful to hear it spoken out loud! 🤟👍😃
You are a genius.
Thank you
I appreciate your channel
When a goldfish grows into a big fish and out grows its bowl, expansion is necessary. True friends will be happy for you the others will show their true selves
Love how you explain things here. Thx!
I think I might have become more myself .. it's good to have a fresh reminder anyways..
This one can be pretty difficult to digest for some, because it only gives a perspective to constantly maintain self-balance. That is a constant battle all life.
Assertives will find this easier, but Turbulent ones will struggle in this more (I'm a turbulent). At this point I have even created my own 3 pointers that I could understand. It's much more abstractal than your 5 Pillars, but I just felt more comfortable with it as a turbulent. Even drew an artwork around it.
"Self, Awareness, and Balance". Anyone who's Ni senses can find comfort around it, would naturally relate to everything in life.
So,
Never make yourself small for others to expand
Still help others but with the overflow of the energy
Be yourself
NOTED :)
MY PERSONAL THERAPIST 💕
I'm so happy I came across this...goodbye survival mode
Just Wow! The making myself small part....
I am sure a lot of people will identify with this one. I certainly did. This habit of "making ourselves small" was a big part of my childhood, spurred on by being made to feel that it was egotistical and selfish to want something for ourselves- it all had to do with thinking about "others" in general and "someone else" in particular - and who was "someone else?" Anyone but me.
I questioned this as a kid, but was afraid to do much about it. However, as an adult I learned that something could be done about it. It was emotionally hard to do at times. I did a lot of the changing in my pre-Myers-Briggs days - taking by faith that my choices were okay, and relying on my intuition - which was also not encouraged in the culture I grew up in.
Fast forward to now, and it's great to realize that most of my choices back then were right - in fact even when I made mistakes, I knew that (1) I could learn from them (2) they usually weren't as serious as I thought they were and (3) I actually did have the innate wisdom to learn and grow - in spite of what I'd been led to believe before.
This is why I thoroughly appreciate when you share your experiences of learning to live the Epic Life. It confirms so much! 🙂
I needed that kick up the butt!
Awesome thanks! This is the key..
💚😃Thank you! I'm just doing this, anyway, this remind me of Elsa's situation, in Frozen
I hate to admit that from the beginning I somehow knew I wasn't gonna be successful as I can become.....time has passed,it sometimes really depresses me(really bad). Somehow I manage to stay afloat,keep my sanity and most importantly MY HAPPYNESS....but some people enjoy comparing themselves to me in order to feel superior in a materialistic way. I'm not willing to engage into an arms race with anyone where instead of accumulating nuclear weapons they accumulate mechanical toys!!! Unfortunately it's become evident most women are truly attracted to that. It's like a true alpha male is in reality a self-centered 13 year old.......IT REALLY SUCKS WHEN THE WOMAN YOU FALL FOR ENDS UP BEING A NARCISSIST.
I know exactly how you feel bro. It was mainly close family members that were making it hard for me. I distanced myself first,, then about a year or more later, discovered and learned about the INFJ personality type and FINALLY things made sense. It's all still brand new to me though,,, I only known about it and started learning all about it about 5 or 6 weeks ago
@@josephsarvis don't know if you're referring to my comment.... But I can tell you I also found out recently about personality classification. But in reality I don't care much for the INFJ brand. I used to proudly describe myself as an INFJ..... IT WAS A SHORTLIVED HIGH. Realized most people don't care or don't know what it means and even worst, some people use that information against you to when engaging in emotional warfare.I advice to keep this to yourself.I believe no difference will ever be noticeable when anyone finds their type of personality. A really bright and welcomed advantage is that now I find myself meeting liked minded people I can open up to in places such as here, in the u tube INFJ channels. Ok bro. This is part of my view. I'm actually thinking of creating either a short film or,book dealing with INFJ s in a subtle way.....ok too long of a reply. Laters bro.
1 Corinthians 14:40
King James Version
40 Let all things be done decently and in order.
Wenzes, it's a no wonder why some people feel like you're talking just about them. 😊 how could you possibly know the most innermost thoughts of my mind the way you do?😅 I got to be honest, sometimes it makes me feel so mediocre to think that someone else could know so much about me without knowing me. But you seem to do that. And that's not an insult. But it does make me wonder very hard anyway, you're the best. And I am so grateful for you. You're helping to help me understand myself and why I think and do the things I do. Much love and understanding❤❤.😊😊😊😂❤
Thanks for the video!~
Do INFJs talk with their hands a lot like you do because my mom is always telling me along with other family members that I talk with my hands too much just wondering thank you
They show very active body language when they are openly expressing. When they are analysing with their guard up, there will be limited body language.
Again you seemed to make a video just for me. You even used my sign lol; and ya know my name and my sign are the same. :P You keep me coming back for more and I like that about you, thanks.
Wenzes, you are the second person, the fifth creature and the eighth tree, I am madly in love with this morning.
Your eyes are so beautiful, I'm amazed how well they see me.
You, young lady, are amazing ☺️
Makes sense...
Really true
Great video , thank you
INFJ thoughts: Its ironic that you are reaching out with life coaching and RUclips videos to the smallest and rarest group of people. True that we put others before ourselves, thanks though.
I might need help with signing up online for getting the life coach help. I'm not all that internet savvy
I will take the risk of leaving my family go out and earn and than i will complete my graduation
Wowwww🙌🏿🙌🏿🙌🏿
I once had a woman i knew kill herself, But before she did she came to me, and I told her that her cat had 3 months to live. I then tried to tell her family her friends her mental health and nobody belived me that I extended her 3 more months, I promnised somebody would care and in the end, it was only me. Boy did that one hurt when I found out.
2 Kings 20
King James Version
20 In those days was Hezekiah sick unto death. And the prophet Isaiah the son of Amoz came to him, and said unto him, Thus saith the Lord, Set thine house in order; for thou shalt die, and not live.
2 Then he turned his face to the wall, and prayed unto the Lord, saying,
3 I beseech thee, O Lord, remember now how I have walked before thee in truth and with a perfect heart, and have done that which is good in thy sight. And Hezekiah wept sore.
4 And it came to pass, afore Isaiah was gone out into the middle court, that the word of the Lord came to him, saying,
5 Turn again, and tell Hezekiah the captain of my people, Thus saith the Lord, the God of David thy father, I have heard thy prayer, I have seen thy tears: behold, I will heal thee: on the third day thou shalt go up unto the house of the Lord.
6 And I will add unto thy days fifteen years; and I will deliver thee and this city out of the hand of the king of Assyria; and I will defend this city for mine own sake, and for my servant David's sake.
7 And Isaiah said, Take a lump of figs. And they took and laid it on the boil, and he recovered.
8 And Hezekiah said unto Isaiah, What shall be the sign that the Lord will heal me, and that I shall go up into the house of the Lord the third day?
9 And Isaiah said, This sign shalt thou have of the Lord, that the Lord will do the thing that he hath spoken: shall the shadow go forward ten degrees, or go back ten degrees?
10 And Hezekiah answered, It is a light thing for the shadow to go down ten degrees: nay, but let the shadow return backward ten degrees.
11 And Isaiah the prophet cried unto the Lord: and he brought the shadow ten degrees backward, by which it had gone down in the dial of Ahaz.
12 At that time Berodachbaladan, the son of Baladan, king of Babylon, sent letters and a present unto Hezekiah: for he had heard that Hezekiah had been sick.
13 And Hezekiah hearkened unto them, and shewed them all the house of his precious things, the silver, and the gold, and the spices, and the precious ointment, and all the house of his armour, and all that was found in his treasures: there was nothing in his house, nor in all his dominion, that Hezekiah shewed them not.
14 Then came Isaiah the prophet unto king Hezekiah, and said unto him, What said these men? and from whence came they unto thee? And Hezekiah said, They are come from a far country, even from Babylon.
15 And he said, What have they seen in thine house? And Hezekiah answered, All the things that are in mine house have they seen: there is nothing among my treasures that I have not shewed them.
16 And Isaiah said unto Hezekiah, Hear the word of the Lord.
17 Behold, the days come, that all that is in thine house, and that which thy fathers have laid up in store unto this day, shall be carried into Babylon: nothing shall be left, saith the Lord.
18 And of thy sons that shall issue from thee, which thou shalt beget, shall they take away; and they shall be eunuchs in the palace of the king of Babylon.
19 Then said Hezekiah unto Isaiah, Good is the word of the Lord which thou hast spoken. And he said, Is it not good, if peace and truth be in my days?
20 And the rest of the acts of Hezekiah, and all his might, and how he made a pool, and a conduit, and brought water into the city, are they not written in the book of the chronicles of the kings of Judah?
21 And Hezekiah slept with his fathers: and Manasseh his son reigned in his stead.
I'm sorry if I made it so easy to be with me.
I'll make sure it's harder for you to be without me -
I promise.
Survival and maintaining status quo sounds appealing. Imagine all the new friends you will meet when the lights go out.
👍
👍✌
🦂🐯👑
I'm EXTRAordinary.
Living in survival mode, is exactly how you abuse yourself
Why do you make it so hard for us?
So you've broken yourself down in order to hit rock bottom to build back better.?
less judgement and moronic standards and none of that, "meh i judge you because you did this good or bad thing but hang on, let's make sure we support animal testing because nothing matters and that makes me better than everyone else"
LoL
Absolutely, but now that I've let go of so much of the past, I feel limitless, other than my lack of money. I'm ready to move forward, but financially I'm stuck... It sucks.
I very recently had to drop things with my twin flame, because it became unhealthy and wasn't progressing forward at all. If anything, it was regressive and toxic. So, I had to cut off giving all my energy to that situation, and had to focus on myself, and stop worrying about her, and since I've done that, I feel 1000x better than I did. I still love her and care about her, but if she's not going to put any efforts into keeping me around, then I'm out! ✌🏼
If she wants to make things right, she's got a long way to go to convince me that I mean as much to her, as she does to me. Until then, I'm moving forward...Meeting new people...Maybe even go on a few dates, and might even mess around and get into a healthy relationship. Who knows? But I am excited about the new year, for the first time in pretty much forever... Positive vibes, positive thoughts, and good things are coming in 2022! 🤙🏼