My recently relapsed bf is definitely straddling the fence. I dont think he has enough skills yet to deal with life-stresses w/o reverting to self-destruct behaviors. He chooses to white-knuckle it instead of really digging in and prioritizing the work of recovery. He quit out-patient early. Been to a few AA mtgs, but overall avoiding accountability. Friends and fam feel therapy and in-patient treatment is the only way for him. I think he could get and stay clean if he's willing to walk the talk. CRAFT has been a life-saver so far for both of us! We havent found any therapists or organizations in our area who practice CRAFT method. Are there any national registers of therapists and organizations we can access for in person help? So often I feel alone in this process, and I KNOW I dont have all the answers. Thank you for all you do, Amber! Your channel and program has preserved my sanity, given me answers and ideas, and helped me see and appreciate my bf's changes for the better, even the baby steps.
It’s extremely exhausting It’s abusive to the entire family that EVERYTHING is always about them And the back and forth with another adult of negotiating with them to not hurt themselves, their kids, jobs etc…. BEYOND SELFISH.. I say after 15 years of all talk and no action. I know say “it’s your life, knock yourself out because you haven’t changed at all but I have”
Thank you for specifically mentioning teens and young adults in this. It was very helpful! . I often struggle with some of the suggestions on this channel as with a minor, it doesn’t apply. I would love more content specifically for minors (less than 18) with substance abuse issues. Love your channel!
Yes I divorced my husband over this and he's living with Java the hut by the liquor store now. His plan was getting a job. I was like you lost last 5 jobs over alcohol. WOW so now he has cheated and won't speak to me 2 months now
Move on. You’re divorced. Why do you need to speak with him? Even if you have kids obviously he’s not willing to communicate that’s on him. You’re free. Live life happily with out the loser.
Can l ask my 25 year old son for drug test. He says without medicine or any treatment he can manage. For the last 45 days he is clean. Now he is coming late nights. Any advice. Your videos are very help full
Hi Lois. Welcome to our little community. If you go to the channel home page and select “playlists”. There’s a playlist of videos that features campbell
You did not put them behind the wheel but it can sure financially burden or destroy the family if jailed for killing someone or if DUI costs etc. Very expensive no matter what. Very tough situation. And you are alwasy the bad guy. Question is if they want to leave when your home should we take the keys and get yelled at or let them go knowing.
That's a good question ⁉️. I've told someone once "I'm not your enemy ,I love you and I'm trying to help you". I also tell myself inside my head, "if what I'm doing or saying isn't working for me, then I need to try something different!" 🤷.
I've watched a few of your videos now and I would like to leave some thoughts. Please don't take this the wrong way, because I'm not trying to sound rude, but I think that your presentation can turn a lot of people away and thus hinder much-needed progress. I say that especially with regard to the addicts themselves, who are struggling but are sincere in their desire to improve their lives and quit, heal, etc. Again, please don't take this the wrong way, because I'm not trying to attack you, but I think the way that you deliver your message often comes across as hostile, very assuming, in some cases very pretentious, and I also think that you have a tendency to make this whole issue more about yourself or a group of theoretical loved ones who are mad about the whole situation, than about the addict, who is probably the first victim in this whole situation and is definitely the one suffering the most. Your tone in some of your videos can easily be misconstrued as one in which you're basically trying to put a moral obligation on the addict, tell the addict what to do, and in a lot of cases it sounds like you're already accusing the addict of something before the conversation even gets off the ground. This is entirely aside from the fact that I think you're practical approach to the whole situation is flawed. I asked you to consider that somebody in the throes of drug addiction, gambling addiction come or whatever, is it going to be a lot more likely to consider what you have to say if you don't take a combative tone from the start. That's all for now, thank you for your work.
WOW! THAT thought 🤔 had not crossed my mind. I guess I'm a believer in that, "you can please some of the people some of the time but you can't please all the people all the time". 🤷
Since you posted this comment publicly, I’ll respond with my view. I couldn’t disagree with you more. Amber is the least pretentious professional I have encountered in a long time, and this is one of the reasons I love her videos. I find her very compassionate and non-judgmental, and it saddens me to think that anyone would think otherwise. Of course you’re entitled to your opinion, but I felt I had to share my reaction.
Makes soooo much sense. You are such a blessing for those of us who cannot even think straight anymore. God bless YOU.
I agree
Yes the drinking driving decision. However, it can destroy family financialy and cause a huge situation when married. You are one. Tough one.
My recently relapsed bf is definitely straddling the fence. I dont think he has enough skills yet to deal with life-stresses w/o reverting to self-destruct behaviors. He chooses to white-knuckle it instead of really digging in and prioritizing the work of recovery. He quit out-patient early. Been to a few AA mtgs, but overall avoiding accountability. Friends and fam feel therapy and in-patient treatment is the only way for him. I think he could get and stay clean if he's willing to walk the talk. CRAFT has been a life-saver so far for both of us! We havent found any therapists or organizations in our area who practice CRAFT method. Are there any national registers of therapists and organizations we can access for in person help? So often I feel alone in this process, and I KNOW I dont have all the answers.
Thank you for all you do, Amber! Your channel and program has preserved my sanity, given me answers and ideas, and helped me see and appreciate my bf's changes for the better, even the baby steps.
It’s extremely exhausting
It’s abusive to the entire family that EVERYTHING is always about them
And the back and forth with another adult of negotiating with them to not hurt themselves, their kids, jobs etc…. BEYOND SELFISH..
I say after 15 years of all talk and no action. I know say “it’s your life, knock yourself out because you haven’t changed at all but I have”
Thank you for specifically mentioning teens and young adults in this. It was very helpful! . I often struggle with some of the suggestions on this channel as with a minor, it doesn’t apply. I would love more content specifically for minors (less than 18) with substance abuse issues. Love your channel!
Your videos have helped me sooooo much!!!! I finally feel like I’m starting to get some of my sanity back and I’m getting out of the bad guy role!
GRACE is a beautiful thing! ✝️
This is awesome guidance, Amber, and it hit at exactly the right time for me. Many thanks!
You're so welcome!
Love how your videos apply to all relationships.
I appreciate that!
My kid is homeless living in his car in Kensington Pennsylvania and he’s still wanting to do it his way 😢I’m so sad and frustrated
I appreciate you
Yes they say it and then he slips again and again 🙏🏼
Yes I divorced my husband over this and he's living with Java the hut by the liquor store now. His plan was getting a job. I was like you lost last 5 jobs over alcohol. WOW so now he has cheated and won't speak to me 2 months now
It's very stressful to have your husband lose five jobs. 😮. I hope and pray you are doing OK.🙏
Move on. You’re divorced. Why do you need to speak with him? Even if you have kids obviously he’s not willing to communicate that’s on him. You’re free. Live life happily with out the loser.
Hi Amber, question, does your advice also apply to porn addiction? Thanks for all you share to help us!
Yes. This information applies to helping anyone come to terms with the need for change.
Can l ask my 25 year old son for drug test. He says without medicine or any treatment he can manage. For the last 45 days he is clean. Now he is coming late nights. Any advice. Your videos are very help full
We must be teachable!! Am I willing to take a suggestion???
Sometimes it is not what you say but how you say it, if that makes sense 🤔
New to this channel. How do you listen to the Campbell person?
Hi Lois. Welcome to our little community. If you go to the channel home page and select “playlists”. There’s a playlist of videos that features campbell
👍🏾👍🏾👍🏾💯
Do comments ever get reviewed or only live questions?
You did not put them behind the wheel but it can sure financially burden or destroy the family if jailed for killing someone or if DUI costs etc. Very expensive no matter what. Very tough situation. And you are alwasy the bad guy. Question is if they want to leave when your home should we take the keys and get yelled at or let them go knowing.
What if you have been in the bad guy role for a long time?!?
That's a good question ⁉️. I've told someone once "I'm not your enemy ,I love you and I'm trying to help you". I also tell myself inside my head, "if what I'm doing or saying isn't working for me, then I need to try something different!" 🤷.
This must have went quik or I cant comment live. Hmm.
This one was shorter than usual.
I've watched a few of your videos now and I would like to leave some thoughts. Please don't take this the wrong way, because I'm not trying to sound rude, but I think that your presentation can turn a lot of people away and thus hinder much-needed progress. I say that especially with regard to the addicts themselves, who are struggling but are sincere in their desire to improve their lives and quit, heal, etc. Again, please don't take this the wrong way, because I'm not trying to attack you, but I think the way that you deliver your message often comes across as hostile, very assuming, in some cases very pretentious, and I also think that you have a tendency to make this whole issue more about yourself or a group of theoretical loved ones who are mad about the whole situation, than about the addict, who is probably the first victim in this whole situation and is definitely the one suffering the most. Your tone in some of your videos can easily be misconstrued as one in which you're basically trying to put a moral obligation on the addict, tell the addict what to do, and in a lot of cases it sounds like you're already accusing the addict of something before the conversation even gets off the ground. This is entirely aside from the fact that I think you're practical approach to the whole situation is flawed. I asked you to consider that somebody in the throes of drug addiction, gambling addiction come or whatever, is it going to be a lot more likely to consider what you have to say if you don't take a combative tone from the start. That's all for now, thank you for your work.
WOW! THAT thought 🤔 had not crossed my mind. I guess I'm a believer in that, "you can please some of the people some of the time but you can't please all the people all the time". 🤷
Since you posted this comment publicly, I’ll respond with my view. I couldn’t disagree with you more. Amber is the least pretentious professional I have encountered in a long time, and this is one of the reasons I love her videos. I find her very compassionate and non-judgmental, and it saddens me to think that anyone would think otherwise. Of course you’re entitled to your opinion, but I felt I had to share my reaction.
You sound like an enabler. Her tone is fine and drug abuser aren’t victims.
Most people don't like to hear the truth . She's not being mean or one sided . She is being honest .