Roboute Guiliman Can't Understand The Imperial Cult

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  • Опубликовано: 19 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 339

  • @tommymaximum9084
    @tommymaximum9084 Год назад +4597

    "But the sky's on fire and it's the best I can come up with."
    That is the best description of a tech priest ever.

    • @AThousandD
      @AThousandD Год назад +153

      That's not a tech-priest. The symbol on the robe identifies him as a member of the Adeptus Administratum.

    • @nyet_maker7948
      @nyet_maker7948 Год назад +40

      Or any politician ever

    • @cautiouslycynical9786
      @cautiouslycynical9786 Год назад +37

      @@nyet_maker7948 It got me thinking about the half assed measures regarding climate change.

    • @Hyndergogen9
      @Hyndergogen9 Год назад +43

      @@cautiouslycynical9786 ... That's because that's what it's based on.

    • @cautiouslycynical9786
      @cautiouslycynical9786 Год назад +5

      @@Hyndergogen9 Ah, then that makes perfect sense. Sorry, didn't see the original sketch.

  • @andy_robertson
    @andy_robertson Год назад +2479

    "It's a proper shambles"
    The 41st millennium in a nutshell

    • @sarinat3101
      @sarinat3101 Год назад +27

      I'm in the middle of Prospero Burns and I can confirm it was true in the 31st as well.

    • @anametoignore2286
      @anametoignore2286 Год назад +34

      In the dark future of the 40 first millennium, things are a right bit wankered

    • @jeffgoode9865
      @jeffgoode9865 Год назад +2

      This millennium, as well.

    • @sharemation5339
      @sharemation5339 Год назад +4

      When Guiliman woke up and asked "Hows Imperium of man doing?"

  • @docterfantazmo
    @docterfantazmo Год назад +1732

    *Bloodthirster:* "Blood for the blood god! Skulls for the skull thro- oh bloody hell, they've sorted their cardboard correctly, not a pizza box in sight... pack it up boys."
    *Herald:* "They've put lightbulbs in with standard glass."
    *Bloodthirster:* "SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THRONE!"

    • @freakishuproar1168
      @freakishuproar1168 Год назад +167

      When I'm trying to sleep tonight, I'll be lying there thinking about how the source of Khorne's perpetual rage is the fact that the inhabitants of the mortal realms aren't sorting their recyclable rubbish properly.

    • @TheOneWhoMightBe
      @TheOneWhoMightBe Год назад +45

      @@freakishuproar1168 This is now my headcanon.

    • @Sgt_Glory
      @Sgt_Glory Год назад +7

      I legit loled, thank you for that 🤣

    • @HansLemurson
      @HansLemurson Год назад +57

      Skulls go on the Skull throne, and Blood is dedicated to the Blood God. Even Bloodthirsters understand the value of sorting items into their proper place.

    • @martinfiedler4317
      @martinfiedler4317 Год назад +12

      @@HansLemurson Now we only need to clarify if
      a) sorting rubbish is secret Chaos worship
      OR
      b) Khorne is in secret a traitor to Chaos

  • @KareiKnight
    @KareiKnight Год назад +2766

    Now I'm imagining their "Are we the baddies?" sketch in 40k.

    • @Mortrag
      @Mortrag Год назад +234

      He has already done it, just watch "Champion of Khorne has an existential crisis".

    • @edwinvoncarstein
      @edwinvoncarstein  Год назад +360

      Yea it's already on my channel mate

    • @RelativelyBest
      @RelativelyBest Год назад +33

      I did that joke on the actual "Are we the baddies" video. One of the most popular RUclips comments I've ever made, turns out.

    • @KareiKnight
      @KareiKnight Год назад +13

      @@edwinvoncarstein I didn't realize that. I'll check it out.

    • @jasperzanovich2504
      @jasperzanovich2504 Год назад +18

      The irony is that the Imperium is very much aware of the skulls. It doesn't mean death to them though but humanity.

  • @AutumnOnFire
    @AutumnOnFire 8 месяцев назад +23

    The fact that Webb even has the Civic Crown on is PERFECT

  • @greatpurplecroctopus
    @greatpurplecroctopus Год назад +1231

    "Look at the sky, it looks like a smashed cake! The gods are huffing bonkers! We need to dedicate some of our precious time to a futile and time consuming ritual."

  • @sanguinius3938
    @sanguinius3938 Год назад +1129

    Guilliman, what the fuck are these Lords of Terra talking about?
    inquisitor: bureaucratic stuff
    Guilliman: okay, kill them all

    • @HTWW
      @HTWW Год назад +273

      Guilliman is kinda the last one to execute people for being bureaucrats. It's the inefficiency that offends him.
      So, methinks it'd be more like this:
      inquisitor: bureaucratic stuff
      Guilliman: Okay, but why isn't anything being done?
      ...
      Inquisitor: Alright, you got me. It's not just bureaucracy, it's mostly self-serving bullshit. Also, like half of them are conspiring to depose you.
      Guilliman: okay, kill them all

    • @12SickOne34
      @12SickOne34 Год назад +71

      Since the Lion is here, I'd think the "kill'em all!", is more in his style.
      Bobby G is a little bit to diplomatic for this, I am afraid.
      Let the Beast do the dirty work

    • @HTWW
      @HTWW Год назад +67

      @@12SickOne34
      Guilliman: Fn dropping the formalities! Lioooon!
      Lion: Whaaaaat?
      Guilliman: Go for a walk.

    • @JakeSmith-em5sh
      @JakeSmith-em5sh Год назад +12

      ​@Hohmann Transfer Window Washer I have seen a seemingly sudden and ridiculous number of these references pop up lately. Has TFS released some new abridged stuff or something?

    • @HTWW
      @HTWW Год назад +7

      @@JakeSmith-em5sh I'm going to have to admit to actively sowing some of these misplaced referencing seeds myself. No, they haven't, at least not to my knowledge. I simply find these 'skits' enjoyable.
      Also (again, for now), until body of 40k Lion lore grows sufficiently, I'm treating his return with more than a little bit of contempt, much like I did with Guilliman's. Hence the lackadaisical referencing.
      I am enjoying the deluge of new vids like this one, though. And this one specifically is extra good.

  • @Obviouslyitisomar
    @Obviouslyitisomar Год назад +714

    if you imagine the laugh track is the aeldaris reaction its 100xs funnier

    • @SableTwoSeven
      @SableTwoSeven Год назад +33

      The Orks would be laughing too!

    • @joriankell1983
      @joriankell1983 Год назад +43

      Harlequins...

    • @BaalBandit
      @BaalBandit Год назад +14

      Hahaha silly monkeh's

    • @TheHuangShan
      @TheHuangShan Год назад +16

      There is no need to imagine a laugh track when looking at the space elfs, their whole existence is a joke.

    • @joriankell1983
      @joriankell1983 Год назад

      @@TheHuangShan you sound butthurt. What happened? Did Howling Banshees tear up your gunline?

  • @m-w-y7325
    @m-w-y7325 Год назад +238

    and then Roby G finally realizes the wiseman has been reading one of his brother's books again, the one that now wears spikey armour and has horns coming out the four sides of his head.

    • @sunstorm_
      @sunstorm_ Год назад +17

      The one whose fault this all is?

    • @ezonplays2260
      @ezonplays2260 Год назад +20

      ​@@sunstorm_ Magnus. Its all magnus's fault.

    • @dangerousdays2052
      @dangerousdays2052 Год назад +10

      Lorgar tried to fix his mistake by bringing the truth of Chaos to the Imperium, but it was far too late.

    • @mordredpendragon1235
      @mordredpendragon1235 Год назад +4

      ​@Dangerous Days It was a success but in a different way
      Like worshipping the Emperor as a god

    • @henrypaleveda7760
      @henrypaleveda7760 Год назад +8

      @@ezonplays2260 different nature of their failures. Magnus had a singly fantastic mistake that cascaded, Lorgar continually worked and sabotaged the purpose that they worked towards.

  • @Jaxymann
    @Jaxymann Год назад +1108

    The cult leader suggesting sorting the rubbish into seperate bins as a solution to Chaos Warp Storms is ironically more sensible than anything the Imperial Ecclesiarchy has ever come up with. Truly, he is possessed of the wisdom of the God Emperor himself!

    • @cousinzeke4888
      @cousinzeke4888 Год назад +58

      Tell that to the sisters of battle with their actual angel and miracles so consistent they can plan around them.

    • @michaelwoffindin
      @michaelwoffindin Год назад +4

      He is WHAT!

    • @jennyjohn704
      @jennyjohn704 Год назад +4

      @@michaelwoffindin He means a religious government. I think he wanted to sound clever by using the word 'ecclesiarchy' instead of being clear.

    • @gu8647
      @gu8647 Год назад +46

      @@jennyjohn704 I think they used the term Ecclesiarchy cause that’s what the religious branch of the Imperial government is often called in 40K.

    • @drafezard7315
      @drafezard7315 Год назад +29

      @@jennyjohn704 They weren't trying to be clever, that's simply what it's called.

  • @ColCoal
    @ColCoal Год назад +150

    I very much vibe with the declaration, "Yea it's really bad, but it's the best i could come up with."

  • @meola69420
    @meola69420 Год назад +148

    If the sky is on fire and you are pissing into the wind, you're going to buy yourself some time!

    • @ghironsingh
      @ghironsingh Год назад +7

      The best he could come up with on short notice. 😂😂😂

    • @leoprzytuac3660
      @leoprzytuac3660 Год назад

      That actually sounds like a wise quote

  • @TheTruthNEGFTW
    @TheTruthNEGFTW Год назад +211

    Imperial Priest - "We need to sort our rubbish into seperate bins"
    Guilliman - "YES, YES, OH BY MY FATHER YES!"
    *begins feverishly organising all bins in the imperium and drowns the Tyranids in plastic*

    • @scratthesquirrel5242
      @scratthesquirrel5242 Год назад +11

      bobby g, the ocd member of the family

    • @randomdude8202
      @randomdude8202 Год назад +7

      Nids probably find a way to digest it

    • @blakearius
      @blakearius 9 месяцев назад +8

      Collect a Tyranid army and you'll also drown in plastic.

    • @Shiftdougler
      @Shiftdougler 4 месяца назад +1

      Plastic is not a biomass, you’re onto something

  • @jlb7608
    @jlb7608 Год назад +199

    The guy Guilliman is talking to is an Administratum clerk, not a member of the Ecclesiarchy. But I guess the fact that it's hard to tell an accountant from a priest in the imperium is pretty funny too.

  • @TheJerbol
    @TheJerbol Год назад +81

    When the sky's on fire, pissing in the wind sounds like a good idea

    • @dangerousdays2052
      @dangerousdays2052 Год назад +12

      But you have to squeeze really hard to get your piss to go high enough to be effective.

    • @boobtoobest
      @boobtoobest 14 дней назад

      @@dangerousdays2052 this comment. 'really hard' lol

  • @PeterMcleod117
    @PeterMcleod117 Год назад +145

    This somehow manages to sum up how the imperium works perfectly.

    • @HrHaakon
      @HrHaakon Год назад +9

      Yes, with the addendum that it actually *works*.

    • @alaskarii007
      @alaskarii007 Месяц назад

      ​@@HrHaakon*air quotes*

  • @WoodImp
    @WoodImp Год назад +169

    Genuinely reminded me it's bin night

    • @PaulTheadra
      @PaulTheadra Год назад +4

      same here in Las Vegas, lol

    • @edwinvoncarstein
      @edwinvoncarstein  Год назад +31

      Stop editing for a second and segregate your bins mate!

    • @DaFinkingOrk
      @DaFinkingOrk Год назад +6

      Make sure to take the metal lids off any glass jars and sort them accordingly or you'll doom us all!!!

    • @WoodImp
      @WoodImp Год назад +1

      @@edwinvoncarstein It's something to do while after effects tries to melt my cpu during rendering

    • @jimdotcom1972
      @jimdotcom1972 Год назад +1

      fuck, i saw this on a monday morning

  • @koboldprime2257
    @koboldprime2257 Год назад +135

    I can't believe how well this fits. Feels like a "cannon" conversation.

  • @Kylephibbsky
    @Kylephibbsky Год назад +42

    I really thought this would be the Vectron skit, with Roboute increasingly confused about why everyone keeps worshipping his father despite that being explicitly against his instruction.

  • @bencurran3204
    @bencurran3204 Год назад +41

    "Pissing in the wind" definition of Imperial attempts in Imperial Nylus

  • @SadGinseng
    @SadGinseng Год назад +76

    Gulliman wasn't at work last Wednesday and now everything is talking about this "god emperor".

    • @jonsnow7586
      @jonsnow7586 Год назад +9

      By the God-Emperor's knees, let's crack open the chablis!

    • @HansLemurson
      @HansLemurson Год назад +4

      By the Emperor's golden wings, haven't you heard?

    • @CABALlc1
      @CABALlc1 Год назад +7

      Greetings, by the Emperor's kindly power claw...

    • @Hangman11
      @Hangman11 Месяц назад

      I cant believe the emperor Was the Bay Harbour Butcher all along

  • @rickeyheard4454
    @rickeyheard4454 Год назад +54

    he makes a fair ass point

  • @justyagre6296
    @justyagre6296 11 месяцев назад +6

    After only a single day of sorting the rubbish, the Eye of Terror did indeed shut close.

  • @elagrion
    @elagrion Год назад +9

    That Mitchell and Webb Look - S03E04
    at about 18 minutes in

  • @Biodeamon
    @Biodeamon 2 месяца назад +4

    You'd think that gulliman would be all about sorting the rubbish in different bins considering how much he loves logistics

  • @Its_Cannon
    @Its_Cannon Год назад +21

    We have The Emperor and Malcador at home
    The Emperor and Malcador at home:

  • @MrMortull
    @MrMortull Год назад +14

    It hurts how slim the satire is, here.

  • @jesusisherelookbusy
    @jesusisherelookbusy Год назад +10

    "Tell you what Guilliman, that Warp dust is really moreish."

  • @thehowlingjoker
    @thehowlingjoker Год назад +5

    As if Guilliman wasn't already seperating the rubbish in Ultramar.

  • @Frerichs1962
    @Frerichs1962 Год назад +19

    The worst part is, he's right.

  • @kennethclark4599
    @kennethclark4599 Год назад +23

    Nope. This wise man makes sense compared to the Imperium.

  • @D00M3R-SK8
    @D00M3R-SK8 Год назад +7

    This is the best one of these I've seen, it's proper legit.
    "the sky looks like a smashed cake" :'D

  • @flyingrancidm00nfish7
    @flyingrancidm00nfish7 Год назад +4

    Its quite a good start, it would make Nurgle think twice about going to a planet that is too clean

  • @BlueGoblin1
    @BlueGoblin1 Год назад +2

    The sorting begins, and the sister's faith in the task causes a miracle to occur that saves everybody's ass. Roboute is slack-jawed with a face of shock and disgust. While the Black Templars are screaming fanatical praises in the background.

  • @AndersonClips
    @AndersonClips Год назад +4

    this is how every conversation with guiliman and Mathew went

  • @miriam5047
    @miriam5047 Год назад +6

    I think Big Bobby G would actually prefer this guy to what the Ecclesiarchy has on offer.

  • @CABALlc1
    @CABALlc1 Год назад +4

    This has to be one of the most perfect fits.

  • @bot0643
    @bot0643 Год назад +7

    you know...this works, on alot of levels, and gave me a good laugh. Well done!

  • @blackoutninja
    @blackoutninja Месяц назад

    Love that you used the half-life screaming voices for the warp

  • @Jaxymann
    @Jaxymann Год назад +10

    I like to imagine that if the Peep Show characters were each a faction in 40K, Super Hans would be so much of a coke-snorting lunatic he'd make even the Drukhari uncomfortable.

    • @Hiihtopipa
      @Hiihtopipa Год назад +4

      This isn't from peep show though, it's a great comedy though. "The answer is crime" :D love hans

  • @Rytonic69
    @Rytonic69 Год назад +2

    "My Lord, the galaxy is literally cut in half and we can't tell what's going on in the other half, not sure what you expect me to do"

  • @psychshift
    @psychshift Месяц назад

    "skys on fire and its the best i can come up with" sums up the imperiium.

  • @TheNightWatcher1385
    @TheNightWatcher1385 Год назад +2

    “A giant head in the sky is controlling the weather. Did you wanna play checkers?! Let’s be rational!”

  • @theliato3809
    @theliato3809 Месяц назад

    The gods being distracted by tedious little tasks is probably a solid strategy to getting some reprieve from their usual bs.

  • @keegobricks9734
    @keegobricks9734 9 месяцев назад +1

    I love the bluntness of it. "Yeah, I know this probably isn't going to work, but all signs point to our imminent death. So I figure we better try something."

  • @HansLemurson
    @HansLemurson Год назад +3

    Oh, the "Vectron" sketch would also be fertile ground for Guilliman not quite understanding where the whole "worship the emperor like a god" thing came from.

  • @hectorwilson663
    @hectorwilson663 Год назад +7

    Truly not a crossover I ever expected to see

  • @imintheraindripdripdrop
    @imintheraindripdripdrop Год назад +4

    To quote a certain deranged skeleton.
    "Know my pain."

  • @Joshywoshyngton
    @Joshywoshyngton Год назад +3

    The VECTRON sketch would have suited perfectly, as well

  • @daverage4729
    @daverage4729 6 месяцев назад +1

    I just love the idea of Roboute Guilliman describing the Imperial Cult as 'Pissing in the wind!'

  • @tilly4273
    @tilly4273 Год назад +6

    Congratulations you don't need to read any of the new stuff with Guiliman in it. This was it. This was the books.

  • @covahredro8370
    @covahredro8370 Год назад +5

    Take it from the Orks, if you believe it works it will.

  • @JustinShaedo
    @JustinShaedo Год назад +2

    Whoa. Respect on both the idea and the execution here.

  • @offtankgaming1310
    @offtankgaming1310 Год назад +1

    This is one of your best - seamless matchup

  • @PsychopathUltimate
    @PsychopathUltimate Год назад +5

    40K parody aside, this is brilliant satire.

  • @kerwinbrown4180
    @kerwinbrown4180 Год назад +2

    This sounds like the last few years. Interesting times!

  • @wolvo5441
    @wolvo5441 Месяц назад

    Unironically Guilliman would probably like sorting out recycling like that

  • @dmitriminer435
    @dmitriminer435 4 месяца назад +1

    The fucked up part is when it works and Guilliman has to go back to the throneroom to ask the emperor what the hell that was all about.

  • @LaMarcheFutilé101
    @LaMarcheFutilé101 Год назад +1

    When the sky is on fire, pissing in the wind is your best bet to put it out.

  • @raideurng2508
    @raideurng2508 Год назад +3

    These are dark days...

  • @changer_of_ways_999
    @changer_of_ways_999 Год назад +6

    You could have a video every daay fo the next 40,000 years with just using Mitchell and Webb

  • @swolie
    @swolie 10 месяцев назад +2

    "It's VERY pissing in the wind"

  • @maew150
    @maew150 Год назад +3

    Given the state of the 40k galaxy and all the weird shit the regularly happens, this idea legit could actually work.

  • @StandardGoose
    @StandardGoose 18 дней назад

    I thought from the thumbnail that this was going to the "For Vectron" sketch, but this is pretty good.

  • @J_A_Niss
    @J_A_Niss 21 день назад

    "LOOK AT THE SKY! IT LOOKS LIKE A SMASHED CAKE! THE GODS ARE HOPPING BONKERS" is so lore accurate it's insane

  • @bobbobertbobberton1073
    @bobbobertbobberton1073 4 месяца назад +1

    You should do one of Your Highness, the bit where he finds the bone sword, would work with Abaddon finding Drach'nyen.

  • @altiusempyreum1684
    @altiusempyreum1684 2 месяца назад

    Shameless how I could watch these all day

  • @nema151
    @nema151 Год назад +1

    If the sky is on fire might as well piss in the wind....

  • @tylerpatti9038
    @tylerpatti9038 Год назад +1

    You know gods they love all that shit!
    That was the line that got me.

  • @averybishopmartin6964
    @averybishopmartin6964 11 месяцев назад

    That is probably the most sincere Imperial Priest I've ever seen.

  • @viyunia
    @viyunia Год назад +4

    I am laughing so hard right now. This is genius in a lore accurate way.. :D

  • @nakenmil
    @nakenmil Месяц назад +1

    Techincally, that's an Administratum Adept (hence the lowercase a), not anyone associated with the Ecclesiarchy/Adeptus Ministorum/Imperial Cult, although, obviously, most Administratum are believers in, if not priests of, the Cult.

  • @Forklift_Certified_
    @Forklift_Certified_ Год назад +6

    Best one I’ve seen

  • @Kn1ghtborne
    @Kn1ghtborne 2 месяца назад

    I'll understand the entire context of Warhammer in no time with this format

  • @odiedodieuk
    @odiedodieuk Год назад +2

    It’s very pissing in the wind 😂

    • @GreySectoid
      @GreySectoid 8 месяцев назад

      🤣🤣🤣 best punchline ever

  • @manw3bttcks
    @manw3bttcks 9 месяцев назад

    The idea of Primarch R. Gulliman saying "pissing in the wind" ....priceless

  • @Seallypoops
    @Seallypoops Год назад

    "I've got it, we should send more of the guardsmen into the eye, that'll solve it"

  • @the98themperoroftheholybri33
    @the98themperoroftheholybri33 8 месяцев назад +1

    I feel like the "Vectron" sketch would've worked better for Guilliman.

  • @Smok3yR1der
    @Smok3yR1der Год назад +5

    I forget WH40K is a British thing until something like this comes along

  • @diegomireles1773
    @diegomireles1773 5 месяцев назад +1

    so according to 40k lore this is the future huimanity takes if the british became the ruling group of earth

  • @Sorine9
    @Sorine9 Год назад

    I am so happy to discover Warhammer 40k through laughter and memes

  • @edparkes9659
    @edparkes9659 9 месяцев назад

    Thought this was going to be the "By Vectron!" Sketch

  • @lanmassingill9180
    @lanmassingill9180 Месяц назад

    Grimdark solutions in a nutshell.....

  • @KaikuPen
    @KaikuPen 3 месяца назад

    I imagine the chaos equivalent is a Heretic Space Marine being told by a sorcerer to add more spikes and skulls to his armor. "You know, just look evil, n'shit..."

  • @kennymartin5976
    @kennymartin5976 Месяц назад

    Imagine being transported ten thousand years into the future only to find out all of humanity worships your father.

  • @tjbarke6086
    @tjbarke6086 Год назад

    Galaxy in 40k: "It's a proper shambles"

  • @MRFlackAttack1
    @MRFlackAttack1 Год назад +2

    This is good, but I would really like to see more Clarke and Dawe please,

  • @ghengilhar
    @ghengilhar 8 месяцев назад

    Mitchell and Webb is fertile 40k meme potential written all over it.

  • @victorvondroom
    @victorvondroom Год назад

    I can't stop watching this

  • @eg_manifest510
    @eg_manifest510 11 месяцев назад

    If you piss into the wind enough then some of it might blow into the sky and stop the fire

  • @SargentGunnery
    @SargentGunnery Год назад +12

    I mean, he aint wrong

  • @dmgroberts5471
    @dmgroberts5471 Год назад +2

    Quick, burn some incense, shoot a mutant, splash about some holy oils, make the Sign of the Aquilla, then find a hole to hide in and pray some Space Marines show up! But not the Lamenters...or the Flesh Tearers...or the Black Templars - look, just pray some _sane_ Space Marines fix everything, and then we can go back to our thankless toil.

  • @Nexus-6
    @Nexus-6 11 месяцев назад

    "It's a proper shambles". aka the Infinite Dark.. 😅

  • @TobiiVII
    @TobiiVII Год назад

    I was expecting this to be the 'Hail Vectron' sketch tbh

  • @JR-rv3xr
    @JR-rv3xr Год назад

    Ah That Mitchell and Webb look, we meet again old friend!

  • @HereticDuo
    @HereticDuo Месяц назад

    surprisingly this is 100% lore accurate.
    the Administratum would indeed try to solve existential threats with even more bureaucracy, new rules and extreme litigation over mundane tasks.

  • @brigandboy1425
    @brigandboy1425 Год назад +2

    This is entirely too accurate.

  • @HarryRedders
    @HarryRedders Год назад

    I thought it was going to be the "are we the baddies" sketch :)

  • @dnaseb9214
    @dnaseb9214 Год назад +4

    He is a reddit atheist in a world where reddit doesnt exist.

  • @Leglessolas
    @Leglessolas 4 месяца назад

    He makes a surprisingly good Gulliman