I feel like that too sometimes. I’m not sure what you might be going through but I hope things get better for you. Have a lovely day🙂 if you ever want someone to talk to I’ll be here.
YOUR EXISTENCE MATTER.FCK THOSE WHO MADE U FEEL LIKE THIS.U DESERVE LOVE , PLEASE DON'T SAY STUFF LIKE THAT.U CAN ALWAYS VENT TO BE I WILL ALWAYS LESSEN TO U.I HOPE YOU GET BETTER.."NEVER DOWN NEVR WHAT"?..I LOVE U❤️❤️
TW for mentions of SA Having a crush as a hypersexual person is the worst shit ever. You imagine doing vile things to them, hurting them, sometimes r-wording them. Its so fucking scary. I hate it so much. I just want to be loved, but my brain is forcing me to think otherwise. I dont want sex from a relationship, but somehow that happens to be the only thing my brain wants. I find myself fantasizing everyday about how i want to do terrible things to my crush, and its not fucking cute or "yandere coded" its so scary and harmful to me because im afraid thst one day i will act on these "desires."
I hope you heal, I really do. It’s important to me that you know that this isn’t your fault, and I’m so, so proud of you for recognizing that your thoughts are harmful and should not be acted upon, that is the most important thing. You’re not a bad person for thinking of the stuff, you didn’t choose this. I would recommend therapy, you don’t deserve to deal with that and therapy could help you recover and heal. You deserve love.
4:07 i cried at this. i remember telling my parents my dreams when i was like 8 or 9 and they said well that wont make a lot of money.. just jeez let me be happy with myself i cannot tell you how crushed i was that day.
I'm so disappointed in myself, i was only going to eat dinner today, just a little meal, but i had dinner and a snack and a popsicle, I'm never going to lose weight this isn't fair I'm so mad at myself
Vent Yk when you're the only one in the friends group with stricter parents. I love them to pieces but sometimes I feel so restricted. I barely spend time with them but its because their trying to get me food on the table. If I chose to hangout with my friends it cant involve money because recently I have formed this perspective where whenever I spend even a few dollars of money thats theirs I feel soooo guilty to the point where I stop buying stuff. I feel sooo guilty purely because THEY worked for it and I know they would do anything for me including spend money if they need to, but when I buy things like literally anything whether its clothes a new toothbrush or even groceries I feel guilty. Lately my grades have dropped and I feel like ive been letting them down. I study every day and I want to repay them anyway I can especially by getting good grades but I can't even do that anymore. When schools the one thing your good at and your just not good at it anymore you fell worthless. I have dreams, I have a dream career, a dream future that I want. I want to be able to put my parents into retirement but for that I need a good job, to get a good job I need to get good grades, to get good grades I need to study harder, but how do I study harder I come home from school and study every single day. I also see others with similar dreams to me but their soooo much closer then am so its discouraging. Others may have hobbies but I don't have any purely because I want to get my dreams. Ive been feeling so low lately and I try everything to pick me up but nothing has worked. I want to get that dream that I have been dreaming of but I fear that I may not reach that dream. I fear failure. I want to make my parents proud more than anything. If you have anything to just get me to try, try looking at some homework or do at least any sort of work. On top of all this and all the other issues I have, my neighbour lost her daughter who had a muscular disease and her husband (the caretaker) couldn't stand being in a house by himself after she left, to the point where he hu*g himself in his own home. She had a gut feeling to come home that day form work and when she came home she saw her de*d husband hanging.I watched the security footage from my house back and its heart wrenching, she's now having to pay all the funeral bills for the both , fund for her both kids, pay the bills for the house, the hospital bills for her's daughters surgery and everything. I can't help myself but feel so bad for them every time I drive past their house. Just imaging life loosing your sister and father. This is just 2 of the things ive been dealing with. This is already pretty long so Ill finish up but you dont have to read this if you dont want to , you dont have to reply or have sympathy for me, I just need to learn too suck it up and get moving with life otherwise it will leave me behind and wont ever come back. I want my dreams so I just need to work for them. Idk why I wrote this.
Why am i alive
I feel like that too sometimes. I’m not sure what you might be going through but I hope things get better for you. Have a lovely day🙂 if you ever want someone to talk to I’ll be here.
YOUR EXISTENCE MATTER.FCK THOSE WHO MADE U FEEL LIKE THIS.U DESERVE LOVE , PLEASE DON'T SAY STUFF LIKE THAT.U CAN ALWAYS VENT TO BE I WILL ALWAYS LESSEN TO U.I HOPE YOU GET BETTER.."NEVER DOWN NEVR WHAT"?..I LOVE U❤️❤️
"u were clean for 10 days, Vanesa why?why?
TW for mentions of SA
Having a crush as a hypersexual person is the worst shit ever. You imagine doing vile things to them, hurting them, sometimes r-wording them. Its so fucking scary. I hate it so much. I just want to be loved, but my brain is forcing me to think otherwise. I dont want sex from a relationship, but somehow that happens to be the only thing my brain wants. I find myself fantasizing everyday about how i want to do terrible things to my crush, and its not fucking cute or "yandere coded" its so scary and harmful to me because im afraid thst one day i will act on these "desires."
I hope you heal, I really do. It’s important to me that you know that this isn’t your fault, and I’m so, so proud of you for recognizing that your thoughts are harmful and should not be acted upon, that is the most important thing. You’re not a bad person for thinking of the stuff, you didn’t choose this. I would recommend therapy, you don’t deserve to deal with that and therapy could help you recover and heal.
You deserve love.
why is my memory shit? why can't i have a normal and cute relationship? why can't i eat regularly? why am i tearing my own life apart? just why?
My mom found out bout my sh and now I can't sh so my life is a living hell I want to more
4:07
i cried at this. i remember telling my parents my dreams when i was like 8 or 9 and they said well that wont make a lot of money..
just jeez let me be happy with myself i cannot tell you how crushed i was that day.
I'm so disappointed in myself, i was only going to eat dinner today, just a little meal, but i had dinner and a snack and a popsicle, I'm never going to lose weight this isn't fair I'm so mad at myself
Vent
Yk when you're the only one in the friends group with stricter parents. I love them to pieces but sometimes I feel so restricted. I barely spend time with them but its because their trying to get me food on the table. If I chose to hangout with my friends it cant involve money because recently I have formed this perspective where whenever I spend even a few dollars of money thats theirs I feel soooo guilty to the point where I stop buying stuff. I feel sooo guilty purely because THEY worked for it and I know they would do anything for me including spend money if they need to, but when I buy things like literally anything whether its clothes a new toothbrush or even groceries I feel guilty. Lately my grades have dropped and I feel like ive been letting them down. I study every day and I want to repay them anyway I can especially by getting good grades but I can't even do that anymore. When schools the one thing your good at and your just not good at it anymore you fell worthless. I have dreams, I have a dream career, a dream future that I want. I want to be able to put my parents into retirement but for that I need a good job, to get a good job I need to get good grades, to get good grades I need to study harder, but how do I study harder I come home from school and study every single day. I also see others with similar dreams to me but their soooo much closer then am so its discouraging. Others may have hobbies but I don't have any purely because I want to get my dreams. Ive been feeling so low lately and I try everything to pick me up but nothing has worked. I want to get that dream that I have been dreaming of but I fear that I may not reach that dream. I fear failure. I want to make my parents proud more than anything. If you have anything to just get me to try, try looking at some homework or do at least any sort of work. On top of all this and all the other issues I have, my neighbour lost her daughter who had a muscular disease and her husband (the caretaker) couldn't stand being in a house by himself after she left, to the point where he hu*g himself in his own home. She had a gut feeling to come home that day form work and when she came home she saw her de*d husband hanging.I watched the security footage from my house back and its heart wrenching, she's now having to pay all the funeral bills for the both , fund for her both kids, pay the bills for the house, the hospital bills for her's daughters surgery and everything. I can't help myself but feel so bad for them every time I drive past their house. Just imaging life loosing your sister and father. This is just 2 of the things ive been dealing with. This is already pretty long so Ill finish up but you dont have to read this if you dont want to , you dont have to reply or have sympathy for me, I just need to learn too suck it up and get moving with life otherwise it will leave me behind and wont ever come back. I want my dreams so I just need to work for them. Idk why I wrote this.
0:00 real
can you be my mom/dad plz
I really need this🙏🏼🥺💞
I just wanted to say this will be one of my last videosni watch until i am dead. i will miss yall❤
Don’t Do it
1m ago
Thank you for uploading these❤.