Yeah. My brother in law is the same way that guy was, targeting people and making endless disrespectful jokes abt them. That’s why nobody in my family likes him but my sister smh
I sort of agree and disagree on that on the jokes part. Because some people would genuinely feel that something is funny depending on their culture or way of life. Talking it out seems reasonable than storming out.
Also I don’t understand people who complain about their partner’s weight when the partner wasn’t an active person when you met them. What made you think they would keep a skinny physic long term…once age and kids come into the mix no way your gonna stay skinny if you aren’t working out. Now if they were active and then they gained weight I can more than promise you the voice in their head is making more observations than you could ever. They know they gained weight, so maybe think about other factors in life that has prevented them from maintaining a active lifestyle.
The dog one has a happy ending in my opinion. With the AITA advice, OP talked to his wife and made her realize her anxiety was pregnancy related. She never had problems with the dog and she admited the fear of the dog jumping on her came out of nowhere, so she agreed to go to therapy to work it out and he and his son are keeping the dog away from her as much as they can, and training the dog to get used to be around babies. He also mentons other unfounded fears and his wife has been having, and he is trying to work through it with her.
I legit just wrote that the lady is probably experiencing anxiety due to hormones or just her natural mental health (sometimes people go off psych meds for pregnancy) and for her to go to therapy and for the husband to be more supportive of wife's feelings. Glad to see literally what I suggested, happened! I'm in the mental health field and I was getting those vibes from how she was writing the post.
the reason why AITA is full of pregnant women is because they’re constantly told they are overreacting because of hormones so they need comfort or an outside opinion to see if they were
For the dog thing, as a woman I can understand being scared of the dog while pregnant because your belly is really sensitive and your scared that things will fall on you or people will bump into you. However, asking that they rehome the dog is totally unreasonable especially if the dog has never jumped on her before. In order to make her more comfortable I would recommend a new rule of the house where they establish certain rooms (like the primary bedroom) that the dog is not allowed in so that the wife has somewhere she can go where she knows the dog will not be in order to feel less anxious.
Honestly a spray bottle would do wonders. My dogs love people but I don't want them all over guests the entire time so they get to say hi and get pets but after a minute I slam the spray bottle on the counter. They look at me in understanding and go away to play somewhere else. It doesn't happen often anymore since they've learned but if they venture too close they just get sprayed in the face with water. It wouldn't take long for the dog to understand "spray lady not fun" but if this is simply a power move she might abuse the spray bottle. I can only hope adults act like adults though
i was thinking this too. rehoming the dog sounds like a massive step to far. if its that necassary they could just leave the dog with a friend or member of family. honestly i think the wife is being completely unreasonable especially since getting rid of the dog would cause massive emotional trauma for the son and the father as well
She's not an a-hole but she's definitely stupid. I mean, from the first passive-aggressive comment he made she should have confronted him or asked him about his feelings and tell him her own in the PRIVACY OF THEIR OWN HOME. She let that go on for months and then just explodes when there's other people around? It's just stupid. Nobody wants to see marital disputes
@@nickynicks_ when you're belittled and treated like that, you start to second guess yourself. she was made to feel as though she was silly for feeling the way she felt about it, as most woman are. woman are told not to speak up about thins that discomfort them, they need to just get over it, especially when it comes to their SO. she had enough and while perhaps the timing was unfortunate, she was no way stupid. it likely became more difficult to deal with too, so humiliating, in front of other people. she was in no way stupid, and honestly he deserved to be called out in public even.
@@nickynicks_how is she stupid? He literally gaslit her at the end and now she believes she’s “over sensitive” when she had every right to be angry. Dealing with that so much would make anyone blow up he shouldn’t even be talking like to that in public in the first place
@@hayleyquagliano2883 Well as a woman I've never been told to just shut up and take it, but I guess some people are raised different or they're just naturally submissive. But like I said, he had been "belittling" her for months, and she decides that the moment to respond is in front of his family..? It is stupid. Which is not a terrible thing, but it's still stupid. There's nothing wrong with recognizing that. We ought to learn from our mistakes. We're supposed to learn emotional maturity, aren't we? Besides, no, he didn't deserve to be humiliated in a public just as she didn't deserve to be belittled by him in private. Because it is a marital issue. People gotta learn to keep their shit to themselves, and I don't know how close that couple is to the husband's family, but I would never air out my couple problems in front of my family because, well, it's none of their business and because they're critical as fuck too. I'm not saying that she should've just shut up forever, but a person who doesn't act in stupidity would've simply pulled aside the husband and yelled at him someplace else. It's just unnecessary to scream profanity in front people who have nothing to do with your intimacy issues. And in general it's ridiculous how people misconstrue justice with revenge. Or strength with abrasiveness... But we all have out standards when it comes to modesty, unfortunately, so if you still disagree, well, we'll have to agree to disagree!
Just to add to that bridesmaid story, if she didn’t like the dress that the bridesmaids were going to wear, she could’ve just said to the OP that “I don’t think I’m the right fit to be a bridesmaid however I do want to support you in your wedding and come as a guest”. Now she gets to wear whatever dress she wants (within reason) and can still go to the wedding without causing a scene
@@reaganrambles1951 Depending on the colour chosen, I think that is reasonable. In my country, we don't do bridesmaids but personally I really do not find it acceptable for the bride to just act like a dictator on the wedding day. Sure, she shouldn't cave in to any request, especially if she is paying for it, but why not involve the bridesmaids in the colour choice? Personally, just this makes me go ESH. I genuinely do not understand why the bride would go for a colour if one of the bridesmaids hates it and looks horrible in it.
That last story is straight up emotional abuse. "Make your husband sleep on the couch or I will make everyone in this house miserable for the whole week." If the wife and sisters grew up with this kind of parent, I'm sure it's not as easy as it seems to side with your husband and go against your father. They need to stand up to him and have a safe way out before he can throw his tantrum.
It reminds me of a Anne with an E book where she met a family where the father would constantly throw tantrums by staying completely silent and mean mugging everyone during dinner cause he was mad so Anne (the main character) decided to say (in front of the guest, cause one daughter was getting married and her soon to be husband was the guest) that the father had recently gone deaf. This encouraged the other two siblings to completely go along with what Anne said and they started talking so much shit about the father lol and basically the father realized that he couldn't keep throwing his childish silent tantrum without looking stupid so he exploded and basically learned how stupid and miserable he was making everyone. I guess in the old times times, men were just used to having their way so no wonder that father acted that way.
I agree & I also hope they look out for the mom. If both parents are there, she has been dealing with this same behavior for years and likely doesn't know another way to handle it. She should get invited on the beach vacation too lol, and leave the dad alone to stew in his anger.
I’m a bridesmaid this summer for my friend and we’re wearing light pink. Light colors, especially pink, don’t look good at me. But guess what, I’m not complaining or telling my friend to let me wear a completely different color AND I’m paying for the dress myself. Don’t accept to be a bridesmaid if you’re going to get upset about what color the bride is asking you to wear.
If any of the men I know made a joke like that I think I'd throw up... It's never easy to be having a surgery and a man thinking only about his male friend's pleasure and totally ignoring the disconfort of the woman? Gross
im 19 and since i was 12 my mom has been expressing her concern over my lack of social life (ive always had a small friend group made up of tight knit friends). shes never gone as far as calling me a loser but she has shed literal tears because when i was in high school i wasnt going out every single weekend. when i got to college she begged me to make a large group of friends and the fact i havent is a sore point for her. its not a nice feeling but i guess ive learned to live w it
I feel so bad for that girl. Imagine having a mom that literally talks down on you for doing what you love to do and not following all the trends like most girls. That’s crazy to me😭
A lot of Gen Z high school princesses will be like this though. They are all so immature, and even though high school is over for them, they still think popularity is so important. *rme
I had a friend whose mother was like this. Was a popular cheerleader, got pregnant in high school and felt her golden age had been cut short so she tried to control every aspect of my friend's life and it was like the mom never felt my friend was popular or pretty enough, no matter what she did. I didn't really understand it at the time when I was a teenager but looking back as an adult it's really traumatizing for the kid.
I feel this is an issue I see a lot with the older female generation who have daughters. They are either way too hard on their daughter and have these weird expectations for them and think they have to act a certain way, or it's coming from a place of jealousy because maybe they didn't get to experience certain things in life growing up and when they see their kids are living their best life they try to bring them down or criticize them for doing what they love.
@@khaalmalki4039 it's not being immature. He's immature. When an adult can't act their age you have to discipline them like they're a child which is what she did
So creepy for someone to make a "joke" about how tight a new mom is (who happens to be his partners friend?) Yes, make motherhood a sexual thing too. That dad in the last one has been getting his way all their life. Good on them to take a stand finally.
That disgusted me so much omg imagine finding out your boyfriend thinks/talks about other women that way.. Just no. People shouldn't be talking that way about others in general, creepy af joke.
You should do a google form for your boogies to submit their own personal AITA stories and you read them and determine if they’re the asshole. I think that would be so funny and maybe super traumatizing for you :D
For the first one, him saying she was ‘embarrassing him’ in public is not only a massive red flag because it’s a phrase often used by abusers, but he was embarrassing her by commenting on her weight?!
I don't know how his family didn't take her side, if my brother said something like that in front of me to his partner I'd make him apologise or leave before she even had a chance to righfully lose her shiz
Honestly, the man not giving up the dog is completely reasonable. The wife's paranoia doesn't mean that they should give up the dog and cause emotional distress to the family. It just seem like a power move. And that Ryan guy lowkey seems like he's on the spectrum and can't read or understand social signals and cues.
Nah as someone who’s on the spectrum, this isn’t a social cue issue. They asked him to stop multiple times and he ignored it every time. People on the spectrum can understand boundaries, just sometimes they need to be stated explicitly. It seemed like a respect thing to me.
Yes to the first part, no to the second. I have adhd and autism and I'm not like that at all. Neither is any other nd person I've ever met. Some people are just selective.
Right! They've had it for 6 years! That poor dog could literally die of heartbreak. That happened to my two cats that I had to give up when we had to move unexpectedly. They went to my grandma's house and refused to eat. Still breaks my heart, all of these years later, and I didn't even have control over the situation because I was a child. They have too strong of a bond. Also, if the kid truly is super responsible(especially a 14 year old boy??), then what lesson does that give him? That his hard work and effort means nothing? That dog sounds like his best friend. I had a hard time making friends, and most days my childhood pets kept me company and from being incredibly lonely. It sounds like the wife never wanted the dog and is now using any excuse that she can. It probably senses her pregnancy and is giving her unwanted attention and she is passing it off as being paranoid.
As a blind person named Lily (I was tickled by that coincidence), I’m going to weigh in on that one… He was definitely the asshole. Not initially, and it sounds like not intentionally… but some thing I always wonder in situations like this is: how do you think the blind person, in this case, Lily, was managing these 30 something years before you showed up? (And I don’t even mean thinking about this during the initial offers of help, but after she asked you to stop.) Also, I said not intentionally, but actually, I think that’s not true. Because he intentionally decided that his perception of the situation mattered more. So it might have, ultimately, been coming from a good place but… definitely still the asshole. PS, I hate that he ruined the game.
The game thing is where I’m like why did you say what it was. That’s the kids who do that. You don’t gain anything by telling her she’s wrong he just only thought about himself.
@@lexirysbar it also read to be as kinda arrogant that he assumed none of the other people in the room had thought to tell her what it was and he was the only one 'nice' enough to point it out
It may have been well intentioned, but it also sounds condescending! As you said, she is clearly capable of living her life as she has done for 30 years. Definitely an asshole!
@@lexirysbaryeah this is weird to me. The whole point of the game is that she has to guess. If you tell her what it is, you just kill the whole game! I don't even get how he can think he is helping when he is just ruining it for her. He's not even giving clues, he says straight what it is.
I can’t defend the mom, as much as i love doing what dylan tells me… I grew up with a mom who was a “mean girl” but instead of crying about her loser daughter in private, my mother made sure to say it to my face. I cannot tell you how much it sucks to be 14 and have your mother tell you that she’s hates who you are because you aren’t similar enough to who she was in high school.
Yeah alot of moms tend to want to live through their kids. I'm she wasn't mature enough to understand that different people take different paths in life and still end up happy and satisfied.
That sounds like a nightmare, I'm sorry. As someone who was a nerdy band kid in high school (and perfectly happy about it) with parents who were also total nerds in high school, I've always thought there is absolutely nothing wrong with not being popular. Why can't everyone just be friends with people who are good for them and make them happy! Not with people who only care about their social status and themselves
My mother was the same until she died 3 years ago, Im 36. I started giving crap right back to her when i was a teen and pointing out what a loser she was for being so old and immature. Call me fat? Well, you've had my whole life to get back into shape and failed, so why are you talking, maybe work on that shit?? Call me a dissapointment? At least im not middle aged, a dissapointment to my kids and unhappily married, taking it out on my kids. Stick up for yourself, call them out!! Outdated hairstyle? Shopping habit? Goes through too many friends? Outstanding debt?? CALL IT OUT and tell them to get on their high horse when they're not embarrassing YOU, becausethey cant be a well adjusted adult. 🤣😂😆
@@ophilianecr I mean my relationship with my mother has improved a bit over the years but I think that’s mostly due to the fact that I moved to another country… but yeah I mean I definitely had my moments in which I called her out…
@@notmyhairyarmpitsi am convinced that's the only reason child pageants are as popular as they are in america, it's the mothers who think they've lost their beauty living through their daughters
I'm disabled and damn the amount of people who use me to feel better about themselves or completely ignore my requests or instructions (even medical ones like what to do if I have a seizure etc) because they think they know better and refuse to accept they are in the wrong and are making the situation worse, then when confronted use the excuse of "I'm just helping" is fucking infuriating
Not the same but I get it in a round about way. I recently had to have a second serious conversation with a friend about boundaries, some which had to do with indirectly taking my independence away for his ease of mind. I'm currently physically able to do things on my own, but a few years ago when that wasn't the case, this would have sent me over the edge and I probably wouldn't have reacted calmly.
@@yum_838 that may be the case. However, if you have repeatedly explained yourself at some point some amount of fault and responsibility falls onto that person. As for how we related to that story, that doesn't necessarily mean the people in our experiences are neurodivergent. We are allowed to feel upset in the moment. It is how we react in the moment or after that matters.
@@yum_838 Does "neurodivergent" means a-hole, cause that's what he is, that or completely dumb cause he doesn't seem to get a hint when people ask him to back off and stop being "helpful".
I HATED the bridesmaid dress I wore but the bride absolutely loved it and thought I looked as beautiful as she imagined when she chose the dress, at times like this you should swallow your pride and vanity for someone you care about on a day that's that important to them, I wore the dress and smiled the whole time, she was happy, I wasn't happy with how I looked but it was more important that she was (the other 2 bridesmaids looked beautiful, it was the most wonderful wedding and you could feel the love and happiness radiating from everyone there and that is what matters)
Yeah it's a huge day for the bride, it's just one day in an "ugly" dress for the bridesmaid. I think Kat just proved she was never a good friend to start with, I can't imagine making a scene at a wedding and then harassing a close friend like that over something that petty.
like, my brother in christ. i was a kid (around 13) who hated wearing dresses (very active playing + ended up a boy) but even i wore the dress my parents got me for their wedding, because even though it was itchy and i didnt really like it much, it *felt wrong* to say no. like i wasnt even the most considerate or empathetic kid, and i argued with my parents a lot, but i didnt throw a fit about that or anything! jeez.
about the pregnant woman wanting to get rid of the dog: i agree that when it comes to pregnant women, you do whatever you can to support them. however, this would affect the child heavily and may even cause some trauma and resentment against the mum or the baby. i think they should come up with some sort of compromise (like shutting the dog out of the room she’s in so it’d be impossible for the dog to jump on her)
I mean a pregnant woman should get the support they need but they are not above a child's emotions. It's not her or the OP's dog but the kid's. At the extreme, I can suggest to keep the dog temporarily at a relative's house but it scares me that would encourage the wife to think that she will be preferred over his son.
literally so many options that don't include rehoming the dog, red flag that she immediately went to permanently rehoming when her pregnancy is already almost over.
There is a big difference between not looking good in a color & just not liking it. There literally isn't a single skin tone that looks bad in forest green (which is just a fairly dark green), so unless your hair is dyed some unnatural color there shouldn't be an issue with clashing.
I mean seriously forest green is hoenstly a colour that fits ANYONE. And besides its a wedding sure if sb chose pink or rose or anything like that Id probably express that "hey I think I look really bad in that colour can we maybe pick a different one if it isnt too much trouble?" (Bridesmaids dresses usually come in a BUNCH of colours and shades) and then see what the other BMs and the Bride have to say. But then if the answer is no, id just fucking wear the dress😂 ESPECIALLY if I dont have to pay for it! If I had to buy it then I might argue a bit more (I dont see why you should waste money on sth you dont like, but then again you can dye fabric or sell the dress after so not a big deal even then) Ppl need to stop being fucking annoying, literally just TALK😂 And yeah sometimes you just gotta accept sth! Edit: Although I cant imagine this ever being a problem bc my friends are like normal people who you can talk to. And in my sphere weddings are usually a big deal bc of what it symbolises and not abt the aesthetic 😂 I guess its a bit of a cultural difference🤷 and thats ok! Personally I think ppl are WAY too dramatic abt all this and tryna make it PERFECT and fit an aesthetic and have everything exactly as you say is honestly kind of besides the point imo. Like sure you want ppl do dress well and stuff but every single wedding story I hear makes me feel like I just never wanna be part of a wedding part at an American wedding bc the chances of dying from a mf aneurysm over a dress is like 85% 😂
The last one really hit home. If your father isn't a person you'd want to be around then don't be. You're both adult, you have a choice. If he wants his children to spend time with him, he should have been nicer. He got what he deserved. This is why a lot of people go no contact after moving out. We all have a choice
I was never really popular in high school so to hear my mom calling me a dweeb and a loser would have been admittedly very painful to hear I just hope her daughter never has to hear that.
as someone who is adopted, talking about bioparents will ALWAYS be a sensitive subject. especially if the parents adopting can't have children. it's just sensitive all around and NOT something ANYONE should be making jokes about.
Yeah, I don't understand what's so funny about adoption that he just had to keep making jokes about it 💀Sounds more like he was purposefully trying to offend
As someone with psychotic in-laws.. I sympathize so much with the guy who was told he needed to sleep on the couch😂... trust me, just giving in to "keep the peace" makes it so much worse. All that does is give the toxic people the green light to continue using you as a doormat. I have so many wild stories about my in-laws before I finally stood up for myself I could literally write a book😂
My sister in law has always been so manipulative, needy, and whiny. Eventually our whole life was just us avoiding angering her. When mother in law was in the hospital we were too afraid to go see her because SIL was gonna pounce for her usual made up reasons. Finally one day we snapped and shouted at her that she's a terrible person who is controlling and mean and cut off contact for almost a year. SIL finally realized she couldn't control us anymore, got some help and really mellowed out. We're still weary she could one day revert to demon mode but so far so good.
I'm just like confused at how this behavior wasn't noticed before marriage, like that was the one thing that was making me sus on the situation. Like how do you date and get in engaged to someone without ever staying over at their parents house for a night? But like Dylan said about some of the other stories, it's fair to take the scenario at face value since some aspects of it could be relatable to real world situations.
@@nattteo idk man the only time I ever stayed at my bfs parents house is bc he lived there. If we're on our own I really see no reason to stay at his parents house lol that feels weird to me
14:53 this man is not prioritizing a dog over his wife he is prioritizing his child. This woman's anxiety is valid but that doesn't justify traumatizing a child over. She can work through her anxiety another way.
Exactly. Talk to her. Speak with professionals about dogs and pregnancy. She's not "dumb" for feeling anxious, at all. But even though she is pregnant, she can't uproot the entire life of his previous child, whose bonded to the dog for 9 years. And if she still feels anxious after speaking about her anxiety (which, I'm guessing, she has a lot of since she's a first time mother, and I can imagine it's extremely anxiety-inducing, NOT hormonal necessarily like other people are saying), they could look into options of having friends, families, or fosters take the pup in during the pregnancy
exactly! it definitely seems like she just doesnt like the dog and is trying to leverage the pregnancy, especially since dogs actually have a tendency to protect pregnant women 💀
@@Beeeeeee0528exactly she’s a freak. Like girl the dog has never jumped and u don’t even take care of it. That dog and the child have a strong bad u can’t just take that away over an unfounded anxiety
There’s an update that I know of about the pregnant woman being paranoid about their dog. The husband told the doctor about the situation and he said it’s really common in early pregnancy for women to get paranoid about their pets harming them, even when they are well trained and friendly. It’s to do with hormone changes and the instinct of their new vulnerability. They are working through it now which it good.
Even though it was the shortest post in the video, I had a similar experience to the girl whose dad called her an idiot for not calling him to pick her up. The summer before my sophomore year of high school, I got let out of cheer practice like twenty minutes early, and rather than call my mother, I just decided I would sit and wait for her because I figured twenty minutes wasn't that long and she had a tendency to arrive early anyways. So I went to a private high school, so I left the gate to see if my mother had arrived yet; she hadn't, but the door to get back in had locked (it was normally kept open during the summer, which was why I didn't think to prop it open). Long story short, when my mother found me sitting there outside the gate (I'd been there maybe for ten minutes) she went absolutely apeshit on me and did kind of what the girl's dad in the post did, telling me I was stupid and hitting me in the head to emphasize that I had nothing going on up there. She has a history of abusive behavior to my sister and I but that's one incident I'll never forget because it really hammered home for me the idea that I was genuinely an idiot. Believing that I'm not stupid is something I still actively struggle with as an adult, so like Dylan said, don't ever ever ever namecall your children. It has lasting effects, promise.
Was looking for a comment on this post. I have almost the opposite experience to you but the other half of the story. I'm the child that wouldn't have called because I didn't think they would show up. For all my years of grade school I would consistently be at school for multiple hours after class was done. I just expected it. I'd bring a book with me and I'd climb up in my tree and I'd wait. Earliest she ever showed up was probably 20 minutes late. On average it was about an hour. She was a drunk. She only got sober my sophomore year, when I finally got a license and didn't have to rely on her anymore. In high school, it was okay. Like I said I had my tree, or I could walk by myself to get some food and wait there. But I remember consistently being brought back into the elementary school by teachers or principals because me and my brother would just be left stranded there while we watched all of our friends get picked up.
@@user-mAfuNqrSe020x you clearly stated your parents are loving and rarely get mad. The girl in the reddit either doesn’t trust her father or knows he gets mad at everything so she avoided him. The father didn’t give any backstory about his relationship with his daughter and it’s kind of sus.
you aren't stupid. waiting 20 minutes is a far more reasonable choice than calling your mom to pick you up early. your mother had her own issues that she took out on you. you never deserved to be treated that way I know it's obvious to say, but I just want to make sure you hear it enough
Here’s the thing, if that father angers easily and is always unreasonable then there’s probably some past abuse there that has deep seeds of fear in the girls that even if they agree they don’t want that anger pointed at them.
What i was thinking tbh. Often abuse like this teaches u to be obedient and just go along with stuff to keep the peace. My mum never got violent but she did the same thing verbally/emotionally throughout my childhood that left me with that sense of fear (ultimately c-ptsd). Makes sense that it would seem unreasonable to people who had normal upbringings, but IMO for the girls this was a learned behaviour and they're definitely doing it as a survival instinct at this point (it's not like getting married just flicks the switch from traumatised person to completely rational person). honestly when i think abt it like this I feel very sorry for them. Bc the husband/OP is blazing forward to prove a point and convincing them to do things that will make their father angrier. Husband will then leave - not his problem. The girls will have to deal with the potentially brutal fallout.
THANK YOU ! This may look weird and unreasonable to an outsider and especially someone who grew up with healthy parents. But this straight up screamed past abuse to me, they know he’s unreasonable and know how far he can take it, but they’re either scared to stand up to him or already tried to do so but it didn’t do anything.
I think I had a similar upbringing to these girls and definitely went through similar situations with my father and my partner. But the part where it gets complicated is that you can't expect your partner to comply with your dad's abusive and unreasonable behavior. People from the outside shouldn't just accept to be sucked into other family's abusive dynamic, and the OP is right for holding his boundaries. At the end of the day, you can do everything to avoid conflict for years, and situations like this will still happen. It's up to the wife and her sisters, since they also disagree with their father, to choose whether they're going to stand up and tell him he's wrong or sit down, say nothing and let him hold his power over them. It's totally valid that they don't feel safe enough to stand up to him right now, but they shouldn't expect the woman's husband to come back and accept it. Sometimes you do miss out on good relationships because you're still stuck in your trauma.
For the bridesmaid one, the bride was NTA like... what kind of friends does that?! One thing I hate about weddings is seeing people's true colors come out as they try to make a special day that is meant to celebrate two people who found love with each other all about themselves.
I'm always conflicted with stories like these because both people obviously come from a place of vanity. I get the traditions and all that, but there isn't much more self-centered than organizing a massive party where you invite people you sometimes haven't seen for years, tell them how to dress and what to do, all to ostensibly celebrate you and your SO. Like someone wiser than me once said "attending a wedding is like being an extra in someone else's romcom". And stories like these really show how messed up the priorities get. The bridesmaid was underhanded and selfish, but was her presence not more important than how neat the wedding photos are going to look? Or than things being exactly how the bride wanted them to be? Yes the rebellion is misplaced, but isn't the authoritative nature of it all too? In the end they both threw away a friendship over a how dress is going to make them look, it's silly.
@@badaboum2 Actions have consequences. Some compromises were made as well between the bride and the bridesmaid . That's why I think that the bridesmaid needs to be taught the lesson that you can't get everything you want in life.
@@rain01250 You can't get everything you want in life... except if you're the bride. That's what bugs me in most of these, it feels like people battling over who is rightfully entitled to others bending over backwards to please them.
There was so much time for the bridesmaid to say she didn't want to wear it/wanted out of the wedding party... like they all tried them on at the fitting did she just say nothing? She didn't even have to pay for it (and some brides DO make their bridesmaids pay for fugly expensive dresses) she just had to wear it for one day
For anyone wondering about the climbing jargon: The difficulty scale starts at V0, with bigger numbers being more difficult. A V6 is pretty difficult, but definitely not the hardest. Flashing just means getting to the top on the first attempt. The five second hold isn’t strictly necessary unless it’s a competition or something, as long as you’re not actively slipping off.
As a comp kid, the rules did change recently and the judge has to decide if the climber controls the top. The rule doesn't work well and there is a lot more cheating now
Good for the guy who refused to sleep on the couch. It was unreasonable to begin with but to then flip out on him because he booked a hotel? That is some next level controlling stuff. In situations like that, giving in will only make things worse for you in the future so I'm glad he stood his ground.
Actually it’s the opposite, these kinds of abusive controlling fathers don’t handle people standing up for themselves well, they can turn very violent. The women aren’t arguing with him because they know what he is capable of and are still scared of him.
when i was pregnant the second time, I was very grossed out by my dog, which i'd owned for 8yrs by that point. something about walking her, picking up her waste, even just her getting her hair on me grossed me out. but she's a part of the household and I understood that i'd only be pregnant for so long. long story short: the wife afraid of the dog jumping on her should probably seek a little bit of therapy to reduce her anxiety, cause she'll probably be anxious about a lot of things then. and maybe the rest of the family can find ways to train the dog or add distance between the dog and the pregnant wife so there's less anxiety.
OP came back and updated that they had done something similar. I believe wife was speaking to her obgyn and/or a therapist, and husband and son had started trying to acclimate the dog to babies by babysitting for friends/family and letting the dog be around the babies. They did warn the other parents that the baby would be used to sort of train their dog lol so nothing shady was going on there either. As far as AITA updates go it was one of the most level headed compromises I've seen in a while, wife definitely seems to be in a better place now.
"awkward silence took over" showing up twice is a good catch by Dylan lmao, there probably are people just mass posting fake stories to farm karma and their writing style must come through
@@SandraTaylorsVersion I didn't watch the video all the way through tbh cause I was starting to realise I've already read the stories. But Dylan does point out when the second story featuring that phrase came up? Like he verbally pointed out that it was weird.
I had a friend in middle school whose mom started mocking her for being friends with my friend group. We were nerdy, weebs in band. She stopped hanging out with us and starting dressing preppy and hanging out with the mean girls, I still feel sorry for her that her mom cared more about people's perception rather than her daughter's actual happiness.
If it were Kat's wedding, that's HER day. She can wear what she wants and her bridesmaids wear what the bride wants them to wear. But it AIN'T Kat's day, so she needs to suck it up and realize that OP's wedding is not all about her. Wear the forest green dress for the ceremony and pictures, then change into black for the reception. But, seriously, the fact that Kat hid the dress and lied to OP makes it worse for her. If she didn't want to wear forest green, just decline the invitation to join the wedding party. If you can't be a TRUE FRIEND to the bride, then don't bother and don't get mad when you get called out on your lies and deception.
In regards to the 2nd one, as someone who has been a bridesmaid and gone dress shopping for the dress, IF THE B RIDE IS PAYING WEAR THE DRESS!! even the wedding I was in the MOH wore a black dress and we all wore red. None of us complained and we were find with it.
@@miaelle1500 yeas, i feel like, if don't wanna do the bridesmaid most simple task (wear the dress) then just quit, say you sorry but can't do, let someonelse get your place and just go as a guest
My mom used to be like that woman in the 8th story, so saying that mother she was disgusting is way kinder that whatever i would've said at her. People need to stop thinking of their children as a replica of themselves because this hurts so much having to be the child your parents dreamed of. I just hope the daughter is okay because this can be really harmful and break their relationship.
It is extremely harmful. My mom was never as big of a b!tch as that crying lady, or apparently your mom, and yet her subtle hints about how she wished I was more social and comparing me to other girls was awful. I tried so hard to please her, but I could never be that girl! I was always socially awkward and couldn't really relate to how others were, how they acted or the stuff they enjoyed. Come to find out as an adult that I am on the autism spectrum and it all makes sense now. But growing up not understanding why I was different from others and knowing I could never be the kind of cute, peppy, outgoing girl my parents wanted sowed deep self hatred in myself. My dad is a different story. I hated him and knew I could never please him. He told me I disgusted him, pretty much every day and blamed me for his misery, which didn't make sense because I stayed out of his way as much as possible and my mom did all the parenting. I was a very calm, quiet kid. He got mad when he saw me reading books in my room and broke my light switch and kicked me in the chest. Anyway, while his "disapproval"(abuse) hurt me in other ways, I think my mom's had a bigger effect on my self esteem cause it felt more "rational" and like it was "well meaning", while my dad's felt like he just wanted to hurt me for existing.
The first one seems unbelievable until you witness it first hand. A similar situation happened in front of me and my husband. We tried to get the guy to stop, but he doubled down on how his partner looked bad because she is pregnant. It is so sad.
16:56 this is SO annoying. I know a woman who is blind and you would be shocked at how much blind people can do, especially legally blind people. The woman I know has only a little bit of sight only in one eye but she still cooks and cleans and can even make eye contact to some extent its super easy to forget that shes blind.
seriously. usually i would treat people who have situations like that (blind, maybe missing a leg, whatever) as perfectly functioning people. i would stay respectful and ask once if they needed me to help or do (or not do) something for their convenience, but if they said no, that would be the end of it. like, what, its not like they havent had a whole life they were living imaginably before we met...??
Clearly the crying mother made a pact with a witch that by the daughters 16th birthday she would be the prettiest and most popular girl in school and now the mother is going to lose her house. Makes a lot of sense why she was crying so much.
To Dylan's question about recently pregnant women posting on r/AITA, it's probably because they're usually very emotionally vulnerable and, although I have never experienced pregnancy, it seems from these posts that people tend to gaslight them by saying they're just very hormonal and that they're being crazy, even if their feelings are completely valid.
The mom clearly made a bet that her daughter was going to be homecoming queen and if she doesn't win, she's going to be riddled with debt. She was planning on using the money to send her daughter to Harvard, so she got really stressed and said some things she didn't mean. She felt awful about it afterwards, of course.
That final one is 100p an abusive family situation and the three sisters who have been raised in that sound to be still so wrapped up in the system that they dont realize the toxicity fully and how truly not okay it is. Ive spent the last year rewiring myself from having grown up in a similarly abusive and controlling family system and I am still wrapping my head around it. When you are still deep in it, you may realize that these things that are happening in the family are not okay, but you dont fully get just how not-okay it is because it is your normality. When you have been raised in that, it is what you know and "just how things are". It's basically brainwashing and there's a lot of work that goes into fully seeing and acknowledging just how not-okay things really are and that you deserve better. I really hope those sisters and the mom can start that journey and perhaps the husband can help.
I grew up in one too. And so did my mom so this situation is a family heirloom. My mom seemed like she both did and didn't come to terms with it so she still puts up with and even enables a lot of this as it continues still. I hope it will end soon for the wife and sisters tho. That's not something you wanna spend the rest of your life in too
I think the one with the pregnant wife and dog was „solved“. Redditors mentioned something like that its normal to get this anxiety while pregnant (fear of dogs) and that they solved this in some way, without rehoming the dog.
The „observation“ guy is the definition of gas lighting. Telling her she‘s overreacting and how she embarrassed him im front of other people, when he did that himself, bodyshaming her in front of everyone
I weighed 256 pounds and in that time I lost 56 pounds. I am 200 now and it's taken a really long time and I am nowhere near done. In that time my s/o did nothing but support me and love me all the way through it making good observations like "wow you are looking smaller!" And "I'm so proud of you, you are doing such a good job" it was nothing but positivity and love and he's still with me in my corner cheering me on.
I had a friend's mum (popular girl when she was at school) refer to our friendship group as "fat black ugly misfits". I remember our whole group was pretty hurt considering being a teenager you're already self-conscious. I did get mine back by describing our group like that in front of the mum and the look on her face was priceless.
He ‘means no harm’ has always annoyed me as an excuse. Just because it wasn’t your intention doesn’t mean that harm can’t be done. If they already expressed discomfort, idk why a person would continue with the joke. A joke shouldn’t be more important than not making someone (especially your family) uncomfortable. Also for a knock knock joke 💀 Embarrassing.
Mean Girl Mom’s Lawyer👩🏾💼: If we picture what she was like in high school, someone who probably thrived off of popularity and notoriety, almost in a monetary way. Maybe she’s gone through life believing that one can only get ahead in life on looks and coolness. So to see her daughter being the complete opposite of that (in her eyes), put her in distress for her future. She was brought to tears by the thought that her daughter might not succeed within the realms of her materialistic world.
I would feel bad but she clearly being a bully to the daughter so she deserves the comments from her boyfriend. There's no excuse for hurting a innocent kid's happiness and belittling them for your own needs.
The comment Dylan made about watching how people treat other people because that’s how they’re going to treat you actually hit really hard. I’ve been in a few toxic relationships and it seems like such an obvious thing rather than making excuses for them because they’re so good to you, but I don’t think I ever had that realisation. Bless xoxo gossip girl
Don't feel bad! I dated someone for almost four years (which was about three years too long) who was super nice and kind to everyone, but acted like a child in arguments with me and emotionally manipulated and gaslit me every time I had something negative to say about his actions. I guess it's a rare person that's good natured in public and behind closed doors as well. People are tricksters. 🙃
@@RoseTintMyWorld-cr5zo exactly. It sounds like good advice, and it probably is, but it's not always the case. My dad and my sister have personalities where they treat people who are not close very well because they want to be highly regarded and want to be liked by strangers, but the closer you are, the more you get to know them and see them for who they really are, the worse they treat you and the less they regard you. Everyone always told me my dad was a great guy, generous, responsible, decent, respectable. But he was actually very abusive and neglectful with us, his family. He hated me because I called him out for it in public as a child and was very abusive to me. My sister is so rude and b!tchy with my mother and myself, she is incredibly uncooperative with us. She lives cost free with my mom, leaves a mess and doesn't help clean or do any chores. She won't do us a simple favor if it even slightly inconveniences her. She left to her boyfriend's house one night and locked out my mom and refused to come back to open the door so my mom could get in. She just told my mom she shouldn't have forgotten her keys if she didn't want to sleep outside. But she bends over backwards and is a completely different person for her friends and acquaintances, it gives me whiplash. She acts very charming and kind towards strangers too. Both my sister and dad love receiving compliments, and I think strangers are more likely to give them because they don't expect much from other strangers, so they can get them more easily by being kind and generous to strangers than to family and people who are really close. Like if you went out of your way to help family they would say thank you, but a stranger would be more likely to compliment you like, "omg, you are so kind!" "What a sweetheart!" "So generous!" Because they didn't expect it and that one act is all they know about you. If you think about it, many serial killers were known by their neighbors and acquaintances as being very charming and nice.
I agree completely with the bridesmaid's dresses. If my friend gave me the honor of being part of the wedding, if her court was wearing trash bags, I'd go buy several boxes to see which brand she liked the most. You're doing it for her. I don't know why so many people feel a desire to put their friendships and their friend/family member's wedding in distress over a piece of clothing. This is right up there with all the mother-in-laws and sisters that wear wedding dresses to weddings and act like they had no idea it was a bad idea. Come on.
Simply following orders: To the mother's defense, I believe that the mother's seemingly "inappropriate" outpouring of emotions was just her showing not only deep concern for her daughter's future and wellbeing, but also remorse for how she treated kids similar to her daughter when she was younger. It's apparent that she was some sort of "mean girl" in high school and she knows of the malicious conversations being had in those circles and all my client wanted to do was spare her daughter from the viciousness that may come from kids in that group, and as many after-school specials and fellow losers on the internet will tell you, bullying leaves an impact well beyond high school.
Horror bridesmaid stories make me shake my head so hard like you cannot tell me this is the first time Kat was ever difficult… how did someone this psycho get into the bridal party😭😭
For the 17 year old, it really depends on how they raised him. We only know the dad's side. My parents kept me out of school, isolated me, refused to answer my questions about resumes, jobs, work, actively demonized the world saying it was a horrible place for women and any boss I had would try to hurt me blablabla . . . And then when I got fed up with all that my dad told me to gtfo at 17, which was impossible since they'd given me NO ability to actually do that. It sounds like the mom babies the kid and the dad and her don't communicate and they all sound very strict which isn't great for a kid's psyche. This guy should be consulting a professional like a therapist, not the internet, because this kid has been having issues a long time.
I'm sorry to read that you grew up in that kind of environment. I agree with your suggestion about consulting a therapist, but not because I picked up any indication of the kid having issues (besides being babied/spoiled by the mom and the potential of him becoming an entitled nightmare adult). I think the parents would benefit from couples/parental counseling. The dad says that he and his wife agreed on how they would raise their children while they were engaged. Also, the deal of "university, job, or move out," had long been established. Though, I do wonder for exactly how long the older sibling had been hearing that. It was established for the younger siblings pretty early, but that doesn't necessarily mean it was for the eldest. Anyways, Dylan skipped a part (can be read at 19:52) where the dad explains he had the same rule growing up and that he chose to travel around the world sailing (and working) for two years before finally going to university. I had wondered about the tie-in with the grandparents also saying they wouldn't give the kid any money to the eldest unless he was in school or working. The issue seems to be a change of heart and/or lack of ability to keep firm on the mom's part. Still, as Dylan pointed out towards the end, this problem looks like it's only escalating. From my POV*, it could very easily become a contentious subject that causes a rift between the parents. *My POV as the eldest of two and growing up with a similar rule. My family oscillated between being middle to lower middle class, so there were extra stipulations. First, "covering uni" was complicated by an (unsurprising) out-of-province choice, which turned into covering only the 1st year tuition, covering room & board every year, and co-signing a line of credit. Second, the "get a job" option included having to contribute "rent" to stay at home. Though "rent" was way cheaper than elsewhere, there were still issues with the rule. My parents, also, ran into the problem of consistency with implementation, though they kept a united front. The first problem they had was in being too rigid, trying to apply a blanket parenting approach/rule, and not adapting well to the needs of each child. Second, not checking in with each other before declaring a new element to the rule. Third, blindsiding us kids with the adjustments. In my mind, the root issue for the reddit parents (and my parents) is a need to learn how to communicate better with each other before bringing anything to the kids. Consistent and regular communication between each other and not assuming that factors won't or can't change previously established agreements.
Yeah that one rubbed me wrong.... especially cuz one, it struck a very personal nerve, and two, kids aren't pushed out of home the second they turn 18 in other countries. America is just kinda weird like that
@checksanity i mean most of your post is repeating what I'd said. Yeah, dad should consult a therapist and he and his wife need to communicate better. Perhaps it's because I've worked with kids for about 15 years professionally, but what I see is this kid's got issues, and this is not new shit. "Being spoiled by mom, nightmare to society" IS a huge issue and it's NOT a child created problem. He clearly does not have the skills needed to leave home. His dad is living in this bubble where what he says is law and will happen despite obvious indications to the opposite (you're really telling me the mom only changed her mind NOW? No way.) and it's biting him in the ass. And as you say about your family, there is no flexibility there. Rigid parents don't make a habit of listening to their kids' needs. They can't even communicate with each other, their kids don't even have a choice or a voice. Get Out At 18 was a rule in my house as well. But keep in mind that was 18, and my dad wanted to throw me out at 17. Here, that is legally a minor. I had no rights, no license, and nowhere to go. I've got no problem with well communicated, appropriate rules that take into account a child's needs. In a healthy family, a rule like this particular one shouldn't need to be communicated, as kids who are cared for in a healthy way will automatically want to go out and have a healthy connection with the world and start on their future. This kind of rule should only be used in rare cases, such as when a child's needs HAVE been met, their mental state seems sound, perhaps the parents are not as financially set, and the child has shown no progress on anything and is just being lazy. But that should happen at 19 or 20 imo, not the second they turn 18. Otherwise the rule just causes stress, family tension, fear, and a threat that a child may not be ready for.
As someone who worked in the disability community I saw the “helpful helper” kind of attitude a lot. It’s a matter of teaching them “how” to help and having that conversation of “it’s great you want to help so instead of telling the individual with a disability what you’re doing without their input or immediately helping without being asked - instead ask the disabled person if they need help or what the best way to help them is.” Typically most disabled individuals know their barriers and strengths and know how to work within them with the supports they need. It’s a learning curve for sure for some that don’t realize sometimes auto help is not actually helping.
I mean, there's being helpful and then there's being patronizing. As a woman, I've had men "help" me - and it wasn't helpful, it was them infantilizing me and dismissing my abilities and capablities.
@@LoucheWoman exactly! The disabled individual usually knows themself better than someone else will. And while some “helpers” intentions may be “good” - it ultimately isn’t if you’re not actually helping and just removing the autonomy of the other individual
Listen on the bridesmaid, ain’t no way I embarrassed you especially when I told you it would be ok to change later wear the shit dress for my official wedding pic then change for the after party that’s not that hard in fact it was so obvious you though of it yourself (kinda)
the bridesmaid one is irritating bc she could’ve just declined to be part of the bridal party if it was that big of an issue. she should have asked if she could wear the black dress and taken the no she got.
That story with the 17 year old either getting a job, university or gtfo, sometimes it’s the best thing to do. If the kid has no issues right, like a disability or something, the least they could do is get a job. My aunt did this with some of her kids where they were incredibly lazy and it wasn’t until she kicked them out that they started to be productive humans, they got their own places, have better lives than they would at my aunts, and now have a good relationship with my aunt.
Ryan is the best textbook study of the resucer mentality. The people who think they are "helping" others but in reality only care about apperances and other peoples opinions, not the person they are actually supposed to be helping.
Dylan seems to have achieved such a major milestone in his career. He has served as a major inspiration for all of us here. He deserves all the great things in his life.
About the last one, i feel like the wife's father has been very controlling/abusive for most of her life so she didn't side with her husband out of fear. She didn't support the decision but was too afraid to say anything
The one about the blind lady is so frustrating. I get he wants to be helpful, but if people don't ask for help, they don't need it. My boyfriend's mum is blind and she can cook, clean, do whatever she needs to do very well. She sometimes needs help knowing where objects are when walking, but generally she can do stuff for herself and doesn't need help. It's very frustrating to be treated like you're incompetent all the time and that guy needs to stop trying to be helpful.
Re: pregnant woman v dog story - I think Not the Asshole because, although they aren’t human, dogs are just as much a part of the family as anyone else. If you re-homed the dog, it would probably experience some emotional pain (on the level that dogs experience emotions of course). also, does the child not matter? what about the depression and anxiety the CHILD might experience from his best friend being taken away? maybe there’s some sort of middle ground solution of the dog always being kept in another room from her or the dog staying with grandparents of friends only for the pregnancy? but the dad/husband is not the A-hole for not just bending to her demands
As someone that grew up with a controlling narcissist it does really turn you into a people pleaser type person that "deals with" the problem person to not cause waves.... best thing to do is go NC I did that and am living mt best life now trying to undo my pleaser personality 😅
I will be representing my client, The Crying Wife, in this hypothetical thought experiment. I would like to start off by reminding everyone that the couple had only been together a year. A year is simply not enough time to get to know all their insecurities, and fears, etc. Here the boyfriend comes over. Sees his girlfriend vulnerable, clearly upset, and he asks her what is wrong and asks if he can help. When she gives him an answer, choosing to trust and rely on her boyfriend, he does anything but help. Normally women don't break down over these kinds of things. She clearly must have some deeper, unresolved issues that are being projected on her daughter. Her issues are making her perceive her daughter's life differently. And was it not you, Dylan, who said that if a person was "coming from good intentions" , that continuing to say things to them might not sink in because they "have their own worldview, where they're the good guy" and that you can't tell them "they're the bad guy for being too good of a guy?" My client simply carries a lot of unusual emotional attachment to her life in her high school days. She clearly wants what's best for her daughter, and in her worldview derived from her deeper issues, her daughter can't possibly be as happy if she isn't doing exactly what her mum did. On top of this, in your '17 Again' commentary, you did state that if a person is "in their mid 30's and go back to their highschool to reminisce on the good days- yikes man". And as we all know here, Dylan, you are never wrong. So she clearly had something deeper going on. My client was simply unaware of how she came across. She was in a state of upset and wouldn't be too consumed by her worries to focus on how the other person, her boyfriend I'll remind you, is going to perceive them. Without even giving her a chance to defend herself, explain her true intentions and have him see she was coming from a good place, he shut her down. She didn't need an "unselfish" wake up call, she just needed some help.
The mother has extreme trauma from our patriarchal society and during her schooling years in order to be at the top of the food chain you had to be the stereotypical mean girl. This mindset hasn’t broken and she is worried that her child will not succeed in life (like getting a husband to look after her) and therefore is only looking out for her daughters best interest. I tried😂
when my mom asked me to be her MOH she told me she didn't care what color I wore, i was the only other person in the wedding besides the best man. I still had her come with me to get a dress bc I wanted her approval. if it's their special day you should respect their wishes when it comes to dress code
Dylan: who wears a floral maxi dress at Christmas?
Also Dylan: I would have a summer themed wedding in the winter
not to mention that its summer in the southern hemisphere during christmas which makes it totally valid to wear a floral dress 😭
@@chaeryeong991 exactly! I live in South Africa and floral dresses are basically the go-to for Christmas day 😁
@@chaeryeong991 thank you. I was looking for this comment hahaha
I live in Australia and maxi dresses are a definite for Christmas
I WAS GONNA SAY THE SAME LMAOO
people really be throwing around words like “jokes” and “observations” as excuses to just be rude without consequences
this part
Yeah. My brother in law is the same way that guy was, targeting people and making endless disrespectful jokes abt them. That’s why nobody in my family likes him but my sister smh
I sort of agree and disagree on that on the jokes part. Because some people would genuinely feel that something is funny depending on their culture or way of life. Talking it out seems reasonable than storming out.
the thing when people are like "it was just a joke!" and it's like...literally no one is laughing, so is it really a joke?
Also I don’t understand people who complain about their partner’s weight when the partner wasn’t an active person when you met them. What made you think they would keep a skinny physic long term…once age and kids come into the mix no way your gonna stay skinny if you aren’t working out. Now if they were active and then they gained weight I can more than promise you the voice in their head is making more observations than you could ever. They know they gained weight, so maybe think about other factors in life that has prevented them from maintaining a active lifestyle.
The dog one has a happy ending in my opinion. With the AITA advice, OP talked to his wife and made her realize her anxiety was pregnancy related. She never had problems with the dog and she admited the fear of the dog jumping on her came out of nowhere, so she agreed to go to therapy to work it out and he and his son are keeping the dog away from her as much as they can, and training the dog to get used to be around babies. He also mentons other unfounded fears and his wife has been having, and he is trying to work through it with her.
awww that's a great ending!! : )
Good!!
Hormones are a helluva drug.
That has made my week
Thank you
I legit just wrote that the lady is probably experiencing anxiety due to hormones or just her natural mental health (sometimes people go off psych meds for pregnancy) and for her to go to therapy and for the husband to be more supportive of wife's feelings. Glad to see literally what I suggested, happened! I'm in the mental health field and I was getting those vibes from how she was writing the post.
the reason why AITA is full of pregnant women is because they’re constantly told they are overreacting because of hormones so they need comfort or an outside opinion to see if they were
I think reddit cuddles them too much sometimes tho which is unfair...
@@somebodyoncetoldme2664 coddle?
@@_bella2345 it's cuddle. Maybe coddle is the US spelling but idk
@@somebodyoncetoldme2664 cuddle is the physical act of holding someone close. Coddling is to baby someone.
@@YuniX2 ohhh yeah that's what I meant thx
For the dog thing, as a woman I can understand being scared of the dog while pregnant because your belly is really sensitive and your scared that things will fall on you or people will bump into you. However, asking that they rehome the dog is totally unreasonable especially if the dog has never jumped on her before. In order to make her more comfortable I would recommend a new rule of the house where they establish certain rooms (like the primary bedroom) that the dog is not allowed in so that the wife has somewhere she can go where she knows the dog will not be in order to feel less anxious.
Honestly a spray bottle would do wonders. My dogs love people but I don't want them all over guests the entire time so they get to say hi and get pets but after a minute I slam the spray bottle on the counter. They look at me in understanding and go away to play somewhere else. It doesn't happen often anymore since they've learned but if they venture too close they just get sprayed in the face with water. It wouldn't take long for the dog to understand "spray lady not fun" but if this is simply a power move she might abuse the spray bottle. I can only hope adults act like adults though
Thats actually a very good solution about designating rooms where the dog can't go!
I found it funny how he said “a couple more weeks to go” when she was only 12 weeks pregnant😂😂 she has 28+/- weeks left
@@katrinascarlet5637 i mean this would be a solution if the dog was jumping on people or following her around but its not.
i was thinking this too. rehoming the dog sounds like a massive step to far. if its that necassary they could just leave the dog with a friend or member of family. honestly i think the wife is being completely unreasonable especially since getting rid of the dog would cause massive emotional trauma for the son and the father as well
Being a boogie truly feels like troublemaker premium
IT DOES😭😭
Can’t believe this premium content is free 🤣
@@saraxo6448 don’t give him ideas… wait i don’t think he‘d make us pay for that anyways
Being here since Dylan Won't Participate feels double premium
So True
She is definitely NTA. There’s nothing constructive about telling your wife she’s fat after giving birth! She’s probably already insecure about it.
She's not an a-hole but she's definitely stupid. I mean, from the first passive-aggressive comment he made she should have confronted him or asked him about his feelings and tell him her own in the PRIVACY OF THEIR OWN HOME. She let that go on for months and then just explodes when there's other people around? It's just stupid. Nobody wants to see marital disputes
@@nickynicks_ when you're belittled and treated like that, you start to second guess yourself. she was made to feel as though she was silly for feeling the way she felt about it, as most woman are. woman are told not to speak up about thins that discomfort them, they need to just get over it, especially when it comes to their SO. she had enough and while perhaps the timing was unfortunate, she was no way stupid. it likely became more difficult to deal with too, so humiliating, in front of other people. she was in no way stupid, and honestly he deserved to be called out in public even.
He literally caused it with his man juice , he should take some responsibility
@@nickynicks_how is she stupid? He literally gaslit her at the end and now she believes she’s “over sensitive” when she had every right to be angry. Dealing with that so much would make anyone blow up he shouldn’t even be talking like to that in public in the first place
@@hayleyquagliano2883 Well as a woman I've never been told to just shut up and take it, but I guess some people are raised different or they're just naturally submissive. But like I said, he had been "belittling" her for months, and she decides that the moment to respond is in front of his family..? It is stupid. Which is not a terrible thing, but it's still stupid. There's nothing wrong with recognizing that. We ought to learn from our mistakes. We're supposed to learn emotional maturity, aren't we? Besides, no, he didn't deserve to be humiliated in a public just as she didn't deserve to be belittled by him in private. Because it is a marital issue. People gotta learn to keep their shit to themselves, and I don't know how close that couple is to the husband's family, but I would never air out my couple problems in front of my family because, well, it's none of their business and because they're critical as fuck too. I'm not saying that she should've just shut up forever, but a person who doesn't act in stupidity would've simply pulled aside the husband and yelled at him someplace else. It's just unnecessary to scream profanity in front people who have nothing to do with your intimacy issues. And in general it's ridiculous how people misconstrue justice with revenge. Or strength with abrasiveness...
But we all have out standards when it comes to modesty, unfortunately, so if you still disagree, well, we'll have to agree to disagree!
Just to add to that bridesmaid story, if she didn’t like the dress that the bridesmaids were going to wear, she could’ve just said to the OP that “I don’t think I’m the right fit to be a bridesmaid however I do want to support you in your wedding and come as a guest”. Now she gets to wear whatever dress she wants (within reason) and can still go to the wedding without causing a scene
no! if people start being reasonable, we run out of content!!!!
@@alnklar I don't think that quitting her friend’s bridal party because of a dress color would have been very reasonable either.
@@reaganrambles1951 agreed just stfu and wear the dress your friend wants for a few hours
@@reaganrambles1951 Depending on the colour chosen, I think that is reasonable. In my country, we don't do bridesmaids but personally I really do not find it acceptable for the bride to just act like a dictator on the wedding day. Sure, she shouldn't cave in to any request, especially if she is paying for it, but why not involve the bridesmaids in the colour choice? Personally, just this makes me go ESH. I genuinely do not understand why the bride would go for a colour if one of the bridesmaids hates it and looks horrible in it.
@@memandi2The bridesmaid appears to be completely selfish and is definitely not okay with compromises. So a group discussion wouldn't really work.
That last story is straight up emotional abuse. "Make your husband sleep on the couch or I will make everyone in this house miserable for the whole week."
If the wife and sisters grew up with this kind of parent, I'm sure it's not as easy as it seems to side with your husband and go against your father. They need to stand up to him and have a safe way out before he can throw his tantrum.
It reminds me of a Anne with an E book where she met a family where the father would constantly throw tantrums by staying completely silent and mean mugging everyone during dinner cause he was mad so Anne (the main character) decided to say (in front of the guest, cause one daughter was getting married and her soon to be husband was the guest) that the father had recently gone deaf. This encouraged the other two siblings to completely go along with what Anne said and they started talking so much shit about the father lol and basically the father realized that he couldn't keep throwing his childish silent tantrum without looking stupid so he exploded and basically learned how stupid and miserable he was making everyone. I guess in the old times times, men were just used to having their way so no wonder that father acted that way.
I agree & I also hope they look out for the mom. If both parents are there, she has been dealing with this same behavior for years and likely doesn't know another way to handle it. She should get invited on the beach vacation too lol, and leave the dad alone to stew in his anger.
I’m a bridesmaid this summer for my friend and we’re wearing light pink. Light colors, especially pink, don’t look good at me. But guess what, I’m not complaining or telling my friend to let me wear a completely different color AND I’m paying for the dress myself. Don’t accept to be a bridesmaid if you’re going to get upset about what color the bride is asking you to wear.
If my boyfriend ever made a joke about how tight my friend was, I think I’d throw up
Literally what a stupid and immature thing to say
@@athenajaxon2397 me or my hypothetical bf
fr i’d dump him on the spot
If any of the men I know made a joke like that I think I'd throw up... It's never easy to be having a surgery and a man thinking only about his male friend's pleasure and totally ignoring the disconfort of the woman? Gross
@@mastermangouste5425 like seriously, how gross
as a 14 year old girl who’s not popular if i ever heard my mom call me a loser or dweeb i’d probably sob 💀💀
I would do something far more sinister
I have! 😃🤡
im 19 and since i was 12 my mom has been expressing her concern over my lack of social life (ive always had a small friend group made up of tight knit friends). shes never gone as far as calling me a loser but she has shed literal tears because when i was in high school i wasnt going out every single weekend. when i got to college she begged me to make a large group of friends and the fact i havent is a sore point for her. its not a nice feeling but i guess ive learned to live w it
My mom made me go to a private Christian school til I was 14, so she could only blame herself for how I turned out
@@jacklyntree7752 i went to a private Christian *all girls* school all my life
From kindergarten to highschool :')
I feel so bad for that girl. Imagine having a mom that literally talks down on you for doing what you love to do and not following all the trends like most girls. That’s crazy to me😭
A lot of Gen Z high school princesses will be like this though. They are all so immature, and even though high school is over for them, they still think popularity is so important. *rme
It’s so obvious the mom peaked in high school, and it’s her whole identity to this day💀
my mom was like that cut her out of my life 3 years ago was tired of always getting hurt
I had a friend whose mother was like this. Was a popular cheerleader, got pregnant in high school and felt her golden age had been cut short so she tried to control every aspect of my friend's life and it was like the mom never felt my friend was popular or pretty enough, no matter what she did. I didn't really understand it at the time when I was a teenager but looking back as an adult it's really traumatizing for the kid.
I feel this is an issue I see a lot with the older female generation who have daughters. They are either way too hard on their daughter and have these weird expectations for them and think they have to act a certain way, or it's coming from a place of jealousy because maybe they didn't get to experience certain things in life growing up and when they see their kids are living their best life they try to bring them down or criticize them for doing what they love.
why should she keep the conversation behind closed doors if he's happily saying that stuff to her in front of his whole family lmfao
THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT, he is not keeping it behind closed doors, he is body shaming her IN PUBLIC f that dude
Because if someone is being immature it doesn't mean you be immature too.
AGREED that dude is definitely the asshole
@@khaalmalki4039 it's not being immature. He's immature. When an adult can't act their age you have to discipline them like they're a child which is what she did
Exactly
So creepy for someone to make a "joke" about how tight a new mom is (who happens to be his partners friend?) Yes, make motherhood a sexual thing too.
That dad in the last one has been getting his way all their life. Good on them to take a stand finally.
Also she got a C-section? I still don't see how that makes things "tighter" down there as the whole point is the baby is not coming out of the vagina.
That disgusted me so much omg imagine finding out your boyfriend thinks/talks about other women that way.. Just no. People shouldn't be talking that way about others in general, creepy af joke.
If we're tight it means we don't want it. We aren't comfortable.
@@missvoorhees7964 Thats not always true. You can naturally be tight which is why foreplay is a must.
@@blahblahblah02 that's bullshit. Maybe look into it
You should do a google form for your boogies to submit their own personal AITA stories and you read them and determine if they’re the asshole. I think that would be so funny and maybe super traumatizing for you :D
I would love this tbh
That's a great idea! :)
i love this idea hopefully he sees it
honestly would love it if this happens
the face when dylan calls you the asshole 💀
For the first one, him saying she was ‘embarrassing him’ in public is not only a massive red flag because it’s a phrase often used by abusers, but he was embarrassing her by commenting on her weight?!
Facts, he insulted her first
Facts, he insulted her first
Exactly. That's feels like the words of someone who gaslights people
I don't know how his family didn't take her side, if my brother said something like that in front of me to his partner I'd make him apologise or leave before she even had a chance to righfully lose her shiz
Dude was using DARVO, which is one of the many tools used by abusers to make sure that their victims don’t speak up.
i pray dylan never fires joe, his editing is absolutely HILARIOUS lmao
We need a Joe appreciation video from Dylan cause his edits are great!
fr he speaks for all troublemakers and boogies when he insults Dylan 😂
i loved the steve harvey clip
fr i keep rewinding and pausing to catch all the lil jokes
@@anikaru547 that's a problem for me. Took me about an hour to watch and I couldn't watch at a faster speed 😭
Honestly, the man not giving up the dog is completely reasonable. The wife's paranoia doesn't mean that they should give up the dog and cause emotional distress to the family. It just seem like a power move. And that Ryan guy lowkey seems like he's on the spectrum and can't read or understand social signals and cues.
Yes, exactly! I agree on both points here
Not to mention the dog is part of their family, and you don't abandon family.
Nah as someone who’s on the spectrum, this isn’t a social cue issue. They asked him to stop multiple times and he ignored it every time. People on the spectrum can understand boundaries, just sometimes they need to be stated explicitly. It seemed like a respect thing to me.
Yes to the first part, no to the second. I have adhd and autism and I'm not like that at all. Neither is any other nd person I've ever met. Some people are just selective.
Right! They've had it for 6 years! That poor dog could literally die of heartbreak. That happened to my two cats that I had to give up when we had to move unexpectedly. They went to my grandma's house and refused to eat. Still breaks my heart, all of these years later, and I didn't even have control over the situation because I was a child. They have too strong of a bond. Also, if the kid truly is super responsible(especially a 14 year old boy??), then what lesson does that give him? That his hard work and effort means nothing? That dog sounds like his best friend. I had a hard time making friends, and most days my childhood pets kept me company and from being incredibly lonely. It sounds like the wife never wanted the dog and is now using any excuse that she can. It probably senses her pregnancy and is giving her unwanted attention and she is passing it off as being paranoid.
As a blind person named Lily (I was tickled by that coincidence), I’m going to weigh in on that one… He was definitely the asshole. Not initially, and it sounds like not intentionally… but some thing I always wonder in situations like this is: how do you think the blind person, in this case, Lily, was managing these 30 something years before you showed up? (And I don’t even mean thinking about this during the initial offers of help, but after she asked you to stop.)
Also, I said not intentionally, but actually, I think that’s not true. Because he intentionally decided that his perception of the situation mattered more. So it might have, ultimately, been coming from a good place but… definitely still the asshole.
PS, I hate that he ruined the game.
The game thing is where I’m like why did you say what it was. That’s the kids who do that. You don’t gain anything by telling her she’s wrong he just only thought about himself.
@@lexirysbar it also read to be as kinda arrogant that he assumed none of the other people in the room had thought to tell her what it was and he was the only one 'nice' enough to point it out
It may have been well intentioned, but it also sounds condescending! As you said, she is clearly capable of living her life as she has done for 30 years. Definitely an asshole!
@@lexirysbaryeah this is weird to me. The whole point of the game is that she has to guess. If you tell her what it is, you just kill the whole game! I don't even get how he can think he is helping when he is just ruining it for her. He's not even giving clues, he says straight what it is.
fellow blindy here, I agree with you
dylan: i feel like if i had a wedding-
joe: he wont.
i choked😭
YES, I feel like that's my favorite roast in this one. So quick and subtle.
time stamp?
@@nehirece4527 5:05
@@damilinot thank uuu 🐥🫀🧚🏻
@V ngl I thought he was talking about having a wedding in winter
But I think your interpretation is even funnier 😂
I can’t defend the mom, as much as i love doing what dylan tells me… I grew up with a mom who was a “mean girl” but instead of crying about her loser daughter in private, my mother made sure to say it to my face. I cannot tell you how much it sucks to be 14 and have your mother tell you that she’s hates who you are because you aren’t similar enough to who she was in high school.
Yeah alot of moms tend to want to live through their kids. I'm she wasn't mature enough to understand that different people take different paths in life and still end up happy and satisfied.
That sounds like a nightmare, I'm sorry. As someone who was a nerdy band kid in high school (and perfectly happy about it) with parents who were also total nerds in high school, I've always thought there is absolutely nothing wrong with not being popular. Why can't everyone just be friends with people who are good for them and make them happy! Not with people who only care about their social status and themselves
My mother was the same until she died 3 years ago, Im 36. I started giving crap right back to her when i was a teen and pointing out what a loser she was for being so old and immature. Call me fat? Well, you've had my whole life to get back into shape and failed, so why are you talking, maybe work on that shit?? Call me a dissapointment? At least im not middle aged, a dissapointment to my kids and unhappily married, taking it out on my kids.
Stick up for yourself, call them out!! Outdated hairstyle? Shopping habit? Goes through too many friends? Outstanding debt?? CALL IT OUT and tell them to get on their high horse when they're not embarrassing YOU, becausethey cant be a well adjusted adult. 🤣😂😆
@@ophilianecr I mean my relationship with my mother has improved a bit over the years but I think that’s mostly due to the fact that I moved to another country… but yeah I mean I definitely had my moments in which I called her out…
@@notmyhairyarmpitsi am convinced that's the only reason child pageants are as popular as they are in america, it's the mothers who think they've lost their beauty living through their daughters
I'm disabled and damn the amount of people who use me to feel better about themselves or completely ignore my requests or instructions (even medical ones like what to do if I have a seizure etc) because they think they know better and refuse to accept they are in the wrong and are making the situation worse, then when confronted use the excuse of "I'm just helping" is fucking infuriating
Not the same but I get it in a round about way. I recently had to have a second serious conversation with a friend about boundaries, some which had to do with indirectly taking my independence away for his ease of mind. I'm currently physically able to do things on my own, but a few years ago when that wasn't the case, this would have sent me over the edge and I probably wouldn't have reacted calmly.
Idk if you guys didn't learn anything about the human brain but that guy was clearly neurodivergent
@@yum_838 that may be the case. However, if you have repeatedly explained yourself at some point some amount of fault and responsibility falls onto that person.
As for how we related to that story, that doesn't necessarily mean the people in our experiences are neurodivergent. We are allowed to feel upset in the moment. It is how we react in the moment or after that matters.
that sounds so scary 😖 i hope you never end up in a vulnerable position around them
@@yum_838 Does "neurodivergent" means a-hole, cause that's what he is, that or completely dumb cause he doesn't seem to get a hint when people ask him to back off and stop being "helpful".
I HATED the bridesmaid dress I wore but the bride absolutely loved it and thought I looked as beautiful as she imagined when she chose the dress, at times like this you should swallow your pride and vanity for someone you care about on a day that's that important to them, I wore the dress and smiled the whole time, she was happy, I wasn't happy with how I looked but it was more important that she was (the other 2 bridesmaids looked beautiful, it was the most wonderful wedding and you could feel the love and happiness radiating from everyone there and that is what matters)
Yeah it's a huge day for the bride, it's just one day in an "ugly" dress for the bridesmaid. I think Kat just proved she was never a good friend to start with, I can't imagine making a scene at a wedding and then harassing a close friend like that over something that petty.
I mean, couldn't she have just decided not to be a bridesmaid if it bothered her so much?
like, my brother in christ. i was a kid (around 13) who hated wearing dresses (very active playing + ended up a boy) but even i wore the dress my parents got me for their wedding, because even though it was itchy and i didnt really like it much, it *felt wrong* to say no. like i wasnt even the most considerate or empathetic kid, and i argued with my parents a lot, but i didnt throw a fit about that or anything! jeez.
The mom was just making ✨observations✨ about her daughter.
XD
are we just gonna ignore the fact that dylan said a woman 12 weeks pregnant is almost there?
I love the running gag that Dylan never knows how long a pregnancy lasts lol
lol I thought the same
I even counted to see how many months it were (3)
@@juliacintrae 3 months
@@samr9284 I typed wrong, thank you 🌹
time works differently for Dylan, who's 20 years old btw
Dylan telling someone to go to college?!??! Take note people cuz you’ll never hear him say that again
Yeah college is a scam can’t believe Dylan said to go to college 😮
Between that and posting a commentary on Monday on Dylan is in Trouble, I'm wondering if he got replaced by an AI Dylan
Next he’s gonna tell us to give him movie recommendations
@@Elizabethxo13 literally! That’ll be the day lol
@@Elizabethxo13 He did that once...
about the pregnant woman wanting to get rid of the dog:
i agree that when it comes to pregnant women, you do whatever you can to support them. however, this would affect the child heavily and may even cause some trauma and resentment against the mum or the baby. i think they should come up with some sort of compromise (like shutting the dog out of the room she’s in so it’d be impossible for the dog to jump on her)
Plus it being 21 weeks in he hasnt done it already but you are spitting
I mean a pregnant woman should get the support they need but they are not above a child's emotions. It's not her or the OP's dog but the kid's. At the extreme, I can suggest to keep the dog temporarily at a relative's house but it scares me that would encourage the wife to think that she will be preferred over his son.
literally so many options that don't include rehoming the dog, red flag that she immediately went to permanently rehoming when her pregnancy is already almost over.
@@anishaganguly1440 the woman could face problems during the pregnancy. The child would cry at best tf?
Yes, this or just rehome the dog till she gives birth and then get the dog back, dogs love babies
There is a big difference between not looking good in a color & just not liking it. There literally isn't a single skin tone that looks bad in forest green (which is just a fairly dark green), so unless your hair is dyed some unnatural color there shouldn't be an issue with clashing.
Also it’s the Bride’s choice. What she says, goes.
If you don’t like it, don’t be in the wedding party.
I mean seriously forest green is hoenstly a colour that fits ANYONE.
And besides its a wedding sure if sb chose pink or rose or anything like that Id probably express that "hey I think I look really bad in that colour can we maybe pick a different one if it isnt too much trouble?" (Bridesmaids dresses usually come in a BUNCH of colours and shades) and then see what the other BMs and the Bride have to say.
But then if the answer is no, id just fucking wear the dress😂 ESPECIALLY if I dont have to pay for it!
If I had to buy it then I might argue a bit more (I dont see why you should waste money on sth you dont like, but then again you can dye fabric or sell the dress after so not a big deal even then)
Ppl need to stop being fucking annoying, literally just TALK😂
And yeah sometimes you just gotta accept sth!
Edit:
Although I cant imagine this ever being a problem bc my friends are like normal people who you can talk to.
And in my sphere weddings are usually a big deal bc of what it symbolises and not abt the aesthetic 😂
I guess its a bit of a cultural difference🤷 and thats ok!
Personally I think ppl are WAY too dramatic abt all this and tryna make it PERFECT and fit an aesthetic and have everything exactly as you say is honestly kind of besides the point imo.
Like sure you want ppl do dress well and stuff but every single wedding story I hear makes me feel like I just never wanna be part of a wedding part at an American wedding bc the chances of dying from a mf aneurysm over a dress is like 85% 😂
The last one really hit home. If your father isn't a person you'd want to be around then don't be. You're both adult, you have a choice. If he wants his children to spend time with him, he should have been nicer.
He got what he deserved. This is why a lot of people go no contact after moving out. We all have a choice
Kinda needed that thank you
CONGRATS FOR A MILLION DYLAN! this is such a huge milestone for you, so proud of you young man 🤩 what an achievement for a mere 20 year old!
Ikr! I am so proud of him. I mean he has come so far so fast. Good job Dylan
Bruh so true 🎉 I wish him the best for his new milestones.
Isn’t he 16 💀
@@Bigbagofgamer Nah he’s 20
@@Anna-1924 he looks 5 but alr
You know you spend too much time on aita when you already know 90% of these stories
Hey, don’t call me out like that! 😅
Bro same xD
i don’t spend too much time on aita but i follow toxic reddit on instagram so i’ve seen a handful of these lmao
Same 😂
I was like: oh yeah I already have an opinion based on this one 😎 let's comparte
did dylan really say “couple more weeks to go” for a 12 week pregnancy lmaoo
i rewatched that part several times because I thought I was losing my mind. I can't tell if he's being sarcastic or what 😭
@@sabahk Don't worry, it's a running joke that Dylan doesn't know how long pregnancy lasts.
@@lilzzak It's SUCH a stupid running joke that makes me laugh every time. I love it.
Lol yes he’s said a couple of times that women are pregnant for 12 months lol. Love the joke
I was looking for this comment lol
I was never really popular in high school so to hear my mom calling me a dweeb and a loser would have been admittedly very painful to hear I just hope her daughter never has to hear that.
Unfortunately, she will if she hasn't already, those kinds of parents care more about others perception of their children more so than their children.
as someone who is adopted, talking about bioparents will ALWAYS be a sensitive subject. especially if the parents adopting can't have children. it's just sensitive all around and NOT something ANYONE should be making jokes about.
Yeah, I don't understand what's so funny about adoption that he just had to keep making jokes about it 💀Sounds more like he was purposefully trying to offend
As someone with psychotic in-laws.. I sympathize so much with the guy who was told he needed to sleep on the couch😂... trust me, just giving in to "keep the peace" makes it so much worse. All that does is give the toxic people the green light to continue using you as a doormat. I have so many wild stories about my in-laws before I finally stood up for myself I could literally write a book😂
Do share
Well… there’s the AITA and EP subreddits… so yes, do share pls 😌
My sister in law has always been so manipulative, needy, and whiny. Eventually our whole life was just us avoiding angering her. When mother in law was in the hospital we were too afraid to go see her because SIL was gonna pounce for her usual made up reasons. Finally one day we snapped and shouted at her that she's a terrible person who is controlling and mean and cut off contact for almost a year. SIL finally realized she couldn't control us anymore, got some help and really mellowed out. We're still weary she could one day revert to demon mode but so far so good.
I'm just like confused at how this behavior wasn't noticed before marriage, like that was the one thing that was making me sus on the situation. Like how do you date and get in engaged to someone without ever staying over at their parents house for a night? But like Dylan said about some of the other stories, it's fair to take the scenario at face value since some aspects of it could be relatable to real world situations.
@@nattteo idk man the only time I ever stayed at my bfs parents house is bc he lived there. If we're on our own I really see no reason to stay at his parents house lol that feels weird to me
14:53 this man is not prioritizing a dog over his wife he is prioritizing his child. This woman's anxiety is valid but that doesn't justify traumatizing a child over. She can work through her anxiety another way.
Exactly. Talk to her. Speak with professionals about dogs and pregnancy. She's not "dumb" for feeling anxious, at all. But even though she is pregnant, she can't uproot the entire life of his previous child, whose bonded to the dog for 9 years. And if she still feels anxious after speaking about her anxiety (which, I'm guessing, she has a lot of since she's a first time mother, and I can imagine it's extremely anxiety-inducing, NOT hormonal necessarily like other people are saying), they could look into options of having friends, families, or fosters take the pup in during the pregnancy
exactly! it definitely seems like she just doesnt like the dog and is trying to leverage the pregnancy, especially since dogs actually have a tendency to protect pregnant women 💀
@@Beeeeeee0528exactly she’s a freak. Like girl the dog has never jumped and u don’t even take care of it. That dog and the child have a strong bad u can’t just take that away over an unfounded anxiety
@@noelle2624 exactly!!! I think she’s trying to sabotage cuz she doesn’t like the dog and she’s using pregnancy as an excuse
@@Beeeeeee0528 yupo
"my wife is 12 weeks pregnant"
Dylan: "ooooo couple of weeks to go"
How long does Dylan think a pregnancy is?😀
i thought more people would have commented on this lol. i laughed so hard when he said it.
Righttt lmao
Guys, Dylan not knowing how long a pregnancy is is a running joke, it's been a thing for awhile lol
It varies. 18 weeks to 18 months 😂
Oh- i thought i misheard it lol
There’s an update that I know of about the pregnant woman being paranoid about their dog. The husband told the doctor about the situation and he said it’s really common in early pregnancy for women to get paranoid about their pets harming them, even when they are well trained and friendly. It’s to do with hormone changes and the instinct of their new vulnerability. They are working through it now which it good.
Even though it was the shortest post in the video, I had a similar experience to the girl whose dad called her an idiot for not calling him to pick her up. The summer before my sophomore year of high school, I got let out of cheer practice like twenty minutes early, and rather than call my mother, I just decided I would sit and wait for her because I figured twenty minutes wasn't that long and she had a tendency to arrive early anyways. So I went to a private high school, so I left the gate to see if my mother had arrived yet; she hadn't, but the door to get back in had locked (it was normally kept open during the summer, which was why I didn't think to prop it open). Long story short, when my mother found me sitting there outside the gate (I'd been there maybe for ten minutes) she went absolutely apeshit on me and did kind of what the girl's dad in the post did, telling me I was stupid and hitting me in the head to emphasize that I had nothing going on up there. She has a history of abusive behavior to my sister and I but that's one incident I'll never forget because it really hammered home for me the idea that I was genuinely an idiot. Believing that I'm not stupid is something I still actively struggle with as an adult, so like Dylan said, don't ever ever ever namecall your children. It has lasting effects, promise.
Was looking for a comment on this post. I have almost the opposite experience to you but the other half of the story. I'm the child that wouldn't have called because I didn't think they would show up. For all my years of grade school I would consistently be at school for multiple hours after class was done. I just expected it. I'd bring a book with me and I'd climb up in my tree and I'd wait. Earliest she ever showed up was probably 20 minutes late. On average it was about an hour. She was a drunk. She only got sober my sophomore year, when I finally got a license and didn't have to rely on her anymore. In high school, it was okay. Like I said I had my tree, or I could walk by myself to get some food and wait there. But I remember consistently being brought back into the elementary school by teachers or principals because me and my brother would just be left stranded there while we watched all of our friends get picked up.
people don't realize how powerful and impactful words can be...
@@user-mAfuNqrSe020x you clearly stated your parents are loving and rarely get mad. The girl in the reddit either doesn’t trust her father or knows he gets mad at everything so she avoided him.
The father didn’t give any backstory about his relationship with his daughter and it’s kind of sus.
you aren't stupid. waiting 20 minutes is a far more reasonable choice than calling your mom to pick you up early. your mother had her own issues that she took out on you. you never deserved to be treated that way
I know it's obvious to say, but I just want to make sure you hear it enough
Im so sorry you had to go through that. You are not stupid. You made a reasonable choice not to call.
Dylan's editor is a literal comedic genius?!?! Like damn, I can't watch the videos in secret without bursting into laughter 😭
For real! Deff can't just listen to his vids anymore! The visuals were great 😂🤪
I mean I agree with the comments but why does it also sound like it's actually Dylan's editor commenting??
@@georgenkansah659 I wish I was Dylan's editor 😭😭😭
@@aiashla53005 😂😂😂😂😂
I died at the Family Feud photo
Here’s the thing, if that father angers easily and is always unreasonable then there’s probably some past abuse there that has deep seeds of fear in the girls that even if they agree they don’t want that anger pointed at them.
What i was thinking tbh. Often abuse like this teaches u to be obedient and just go along with stuff to keep the peace. My mum never got violent but she did the same thing verbally/emotionally throughout my childhood that left me with that sense of fear (ultimately c-ptsd). Makes sense that it would seem unreasonable to people who had normal upbringings, but IMO for the girls this was a learned behaviour and they're definitely doing it as a survival instinct at this point (it's not like getting married just flicks the switch from traumatised person to completely rational person).
honestly when i think abt it like this I feel very sorry for them. Bc the husband/OP is blazing forward to prove a point and convincing them to do things that will make their father angrier. Husband will then leave - not his problem. The girls will have to deal with the potentially brutal fallout.
@@coldtaboo totally agree
THANK YOU ! This may look weird and unreasonable to an outsider and especially someone who grew up with healthy parents. But this straight up screamed past abuse to me, they know he’s unreasonable and know how far he can take it, but they’re either scared to stand up to him or already tried to do so but it didn’t do anything.
yes i agree
I think I had a similar upbringing to these girls and definitely went through similar situations with my father and my partner. But the part where it gets complicated is that you can't expect your partner to comply with your dad's abusive and unreasonable behavior.
People from the outside shouldn't just accept to be sucked into other family's abusive dynamic, and the OP is right for holding his boundaries. At the end of the day, you can do everything to avoid conflict for years, and situations like this will still happen.
It's up to the wife and her sisters, since they also disagree with their father, to choose whether they're going to stand up and tell him he's wrong or sit down, say nothing and let him hold his power over them. It's totally valid that they don't feel safe enough to stand up to him right now, but they shouldn't expect the woman's husband to come back and accept it. Sometimes you do miss out on good relationships because you're still stuck in your trauma.
For the bridesmaid one, the bride was NTA like... what kind of friends does that?! One thing I hate about weddings is seeing people's true colors come out as they try to make a special day that is meant to celebrate two people who found love with each other all about themselves.
Thisss
I'm always conflicted with stories like these because both people obviously come from a place of vanity. I get the traditions and all that, but there isn't much more self-centered than organizing a massive party where you invite people you sometimes haven't seen for years, tell them how to dress and what to do, all to ostensibly celebrate you and your SO. Like someone wiser than me once said "attending a wedding is like being an extra in someone else's romcom". And stories like these really show how messed up the priorities get. The bridesmaid was underhanded and selfish, but was her presence not more important than how neat the wedding photos are going to look? Or than things being exactly how the bride wanted them to be? Yes the rebellion is misplaced, but isn't the authoritative nature of it all too? In the end they both threw away a friendship over a how dress is going to make them look, it's silly.
@@badaboum2 Actions have consequences. Some compromises were made as well between the bride and the bridesmaid . That's why I think that the bridesmaid needs to be taught the lesson that you can't get everything you want in life.
@@rain01250 You can't get everything you want in life... except if you're the bride. That's what bugs me in most of these, it feels like people battling over who is rightfully entitled to others bending over backwards to please them.
There was so much time for the bridesmaid to say she didn't want to wear it/wanted out of the wedding party... like they all tried them on at the fitting did she just say nothing? She didn't even have to pay for it (and some brides DO make their bridesmaids pay for fugly expensive dresses) she just had to wear it for one day
For anyone wondering about the climbing jargon:
The difficulty scale starts at V0, with bigger numbers being more difficult. A V6 is pretty difficult, but definitely not the hardest. Flashing just means getting to the top on the first attempt. The five second hold isn’t strictly necessary unless it’s a competition or something, as long as you’re not actively slipping off.
thank you so much
a savior, truly. 😭🙏
As a comp kid, the rules did change recently and the judge has to decide if the climber controls the top. The rule doesn't work well and there is a lot more cheating now
Good for the guy who refused to sleep on the couch. It was unreasonable to begin with but to then flip out on him because he booked a hotel? That is some next level controlling stuff. In situations like that, giving in will only make things worse for you in the future so I'm glad he stood his ground.
@@user-mAfuNqrSe020x I don't even have back problems and I would probably do the same tbh
Actually it’s the opposite, these kinds of abusive controlling fathers don’t handle people standing up for themselves well, they can turn very violent.
The women aren’t arguing with him because they know what he is capable of and are still scared of him.
when i was pregnant the second time, I was very grossed out by my dog, which i'd owned for 8yrs by that point. something about walking her, picking up her waste, even just her getting her hair on me grossed me out. but she's a part of the household and I understood that i'd only be pregnant for so long.
long story short: the wife afraid of the dog jumping on her should probably seek a little bit of therapy to reduce her anxiety, cause she'll probably be anxious about a lot of things then. and maybe the rest of the family can find ways to train the dog or add distance between the dog and the pregnant wife so there's less anxiety.
OP came back and updated that they had done something similar. I believe wife was speaking to her obgyn and/or a therapist, and husband and son had started trying to acclimate the dog to babies by babysitting for friends/family and letting the dog be around the babies. They did warn the other parents that the baby would be used to sort of train their dog lol so nothing shady was going on there either. As far as AITA updates go it was one of the most level headed compromises I've seen in a while, wife definitely seems to be in a better place now.
@@heather-zs6cf Yay! Wholesome, Happy times!
"awkward silence took over" showing up twice is a good catch by Dylan lmao, there probably are people just mass posting fake stories to farm karma and their writing style must come through
It was the editor that used that as a joke later
@@SandraTaylorsVersion I didn't watch the video all the way through tbh cause I was starting to realise I've already read the stories. But Dylan does point out when the second story featuring that phrase came up? Like he verbally pointed out that it was weird.
Nah he replayed the same comment he had made earlier - the clip was the same 😂
@@baconeta no, Dylan acknowledges that’s it’s suspicious and could be fake bc of the phrase and THEN the editor makes a joke. Both happen
I noticed that both stories with the phrase are from the same reddit user so there's that
21:55
“I think after you raise a kid for 17 years, apparently you get kinda attached to the kid”
I audibly laughed 😂
Did some say… Audible ?
@@saureld2448 hehe
I had a friend in middle school whose mom started mocking her for being friends with my friend group. We were nerdy, weebs in band. She stopped hanging out with us and starting dressing preppy and hanging out with the mean girls, I still feel sorry for her that her mom cared more about people's perception rather than her daughter's actual happiness.
Sometimes I forget how mature Dylan actually is... especially for being 20 years old it's really impressive
idk if this is a joke but he’s 32…
@@lolidk3216 It is a joke.
If it were Kat's wedding, that's HER day. She can wear what she wants and her bridesmaids wear what the bride wants them to wear. But it AIN'T Kat's day, so she needs to suck it up and realize that OP's wedding is not all about her. Wear the forest green dress for the ceremony and pictures, then change into black for the reception.
But, seriously, the fact that Kat hid the dress and lied to OP makes it worse for her. If she didn't want to wear forest green, just decline the invitation to join the wedding party. If you can't be a TRUE FRIEND to the bride, then don't bother and don't get mad when you get called out on your lies and deception.
What got me was then asking to be reimbursed for the black dress? Like girl you bought that without my knowledge I owe you nothing
In regards to the 2nd one, as someone who has been a bridesmaid and gone dress shopping for the dress, IF THE B RIDE IS PAYING WEAR THE DRESS!! even the wedding I was in the MOH wore a black dress and we all wore red. None of us complained and we were find with it.
exactly! like, you're getting a free dress
Even if the bride isn’t paying, you wear what she wants you to, or you don’t be a bridesmaid haha
@@miaelle1500 yeas, i feel like, if don't wanna do the bridesmaid most simple task (wear the dress) then just quit, say you sorry but can't do, let someonelse get your place and just go as a guest
My mom used to be like that woman in the 8th story, so saying that mother she was disgusting is way kinder that whatever i would've said at her. People need to stop thinking of their children as a replica of themselves because this hurts so much having to be the child your parents dreamed of. I just hope the daughter is okay because this can be really harmful and break their relationship.
ive been dealing w my mom criticizing my lack of a social life since i was 12, so i full heartedly second this motion
It is extremely harmful. My mom was never as big of a b!tch as that crying lady, or apparently your mom, and yet her subtle hints about how she wished I was more social and comparing me to other girls was awful. I tried so hard to please her, but I could never be that girl! I was always socially awkward and couldn't really relate to how others were, how they acted or the stuff they enjoyed.
Come to find out as an adult that I am on the autism spectrum and it all makes sense now. But growing up not understanding why I was different from others and knowing I could never be the kind of cute, peppy, outgoing girl my parents wanted sowed deep self hatred in myself.
My dad is a different story. I hated him and knew I could never please him. He told me I disgusted him, pretty much every day and blamed me for his misery, which didn't make sense because I stayed out of his way as much as possible and my mom did all the parenting. I was a very calm, quiet kid. He got mad when he saw me reading books in my room and broke my light switch and kicked me in the chest. Anyway, while his "disapproval"(abuse) hurt me in other ways, I think my mom's had a bigger effect on my self esteem cause it felt more "rational" and like it was "well meaning", while my dad's felt like he just wanted to hurt me for existing.
The first one seems unbelievable until you witness it first hand. A similar situation happened in front of me and my husband. We tried to get the guy to stop, but he doubled down on how his partner looked bad because she is pregnant. It is so sad.
16:56 this is SO annoying. I know a woman who is blind and you would be shocked at how much blind people can do, especially legally blind people. The woman I know has only a little bit of sight only in one eye but she still cooks and cleans and can even make eye contact to some extent its super easy to forget that shes blind.
seriously. usually i would treat people who have situations like that (blind, maybe missing a leg, whatever) as perfectly functioning people. i would stay respectful and ask once if they needed me to help or do (or not do) something for their convenience, but if they said no, that would be the end of it. like, what, its not like they havent had a whole life they were living imaginably before we met...??
@@scp-phenomenon014seriously. She is blind not stupid. If she didn't think she could use a knife, she wouldn't.
Clearly the crying mother made a pact with a witch that by the daughters 16th birthday she would be the prettiest and most popular girl in school and now the mother is going to lose her house. Makes a lot of sense why she was crying so much.
Man , this comment made my day
I believe you just won her case, sir
To Dylan's question about recently pregnant women posting on r/AITA, it's probably because they're usually very emotionally vulnerable and, although I have never experienced pregnancy, it seems from these posts that people tend to gaslight them by saying they're just very hormonal and that they're being crazy, even if their feelings are completely valid.
Yes and a lot of the time you feel anxiety over little things that aren’t as big of a deal. I’ve been pregnant twice lol
Pregnancy is also a pretty common trigger for abuse, so I’m guessing that contributes. The number one cause of death for pregnant women is murder.
dylan thinking 12 weeks into pregnancy means she has a “couple more weeks to go” is insane lmao
I think it was 8 weeks, he was saying almost to the second trimester
… a joke
I also don't know how to measure time in weeks
i was so scared no one else noticed that😭
@@SuperKalli9no i really dont think thats what he meant
The mom clearly made a bet that her daughter was going to be homecoming queen and if she doesn't win, she's going to be riddled with debt. She was planning on using the money to send her daughter to Harvard, so she got really stressed and said some things she didn't mean. She felt awful about it afterwards, of course.
exactly! XD
That final one is 100p an abusive family situation and the three sisters who have been raised in that sound to be still so wrapped up in the system that they dont realize the toxicity fully and how truly not okay it is. Ive spent the last year rewiring myself from having grown up in a similarly abusive and controlling family system and I am still wrapping my head around it. When you are still deep in it, you may realize that these things that are happening in the family are not okay, but you dont fully get just how not-okay it is because it is your normality. When you have been raised in that, it is what you know and "just how things are". It's basically brainwashing and there's a lot of work that goes into fully seeing and acknowledging just how not-okay things really are and that you deserve better. I really hope those sisters and the mom can start that journey and perhaps the husband can help.
I grew up in one too. And so did my mom so this situation is a family heirloom. My mom seemed like she both did and didn't come to terms with it so she still puts up with and even enables a lot of this as it continues still. I hope it will end soon for the wife and sisters tho. That's not something you wanna spend the rest of your life in too
I hope the editor can see this: dude, you’re doing an amazing job, you had me rolling on the floor with laughter!
I know right?!!? He’s just the best and did you see on 10:22 that he edited it to say 8.7 M subscribers for oogabooga😂😂
yess his editing’s always on point
And also his and Dylan's WhatsApp conversation pic was hilarious. I hope it's really real 😂🤣
@@manasas868 Where was the WhatsApp conversation I missed it!
I know he is killing it!!
I think the one with the pregnant wife and dog was „solved“. Redditors mentioned something like that its normal to get this anxiety while pregnant (fear of dogs) and that they solved this in some way, without rehoming the dog.
The „observation“ guy is the definition of gas lighting. Telling her she‘s overreacting and how she embarrassed him im front of other people, when he did that himself, bodyshaming her in front of everyone
I weighed 256 pounds and in that time I lost 56 pounds. I am 200 now and it's taken a really long time and I am nowhere near done. In that time my s/o did nothing but support me and love me all the way through it making good observations like "wow you are looking smaller!" And "I'm so proud of you, you are doing such a good job" it was nothing but positivity and love and he's still with me in my corner cheering me on.
wow, this guy is so young and wise. He should write a book
Underrated comment!!
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Lets get in all the teasing before he actually does it lol!
I just wanna thank the editor for this episode, it truly brought laughs out of me
I had a friend's mum (popular girl when she was at school) refer to our friendship group as "fat black ugly misfits". I remember our whole group was pretty hurt considering being a teenager you're already self-conscious. I did get mine back by describing our group like that in front of the mum and the look on her face was priceless.
Ngl that sounds like a pretty rad punk band name lmao
Tbh AITA would be a great place for an aspiring writer to practice writing drama
Watching these videos make me realize how actually crazy some people are.
irrational silly billies
He ‘means no harm’ has always annoyed me as an excuse. Just because it wasn’t your intention doesn’t mean that harm can’t be done. If they already expressed discomfort, idk why a person would continue with the joke. A joke shouldn’t be more important than not making someone (especially your family) uncomfortable. Also for a knock knock joke 💀 Embarrassing.
Mean Girl Mom’s Lawyer👩🏾💼:
If we picture what she was like in high school, someone who probably thrived off of popularity and notoriety, almost in a monetary way. Maybe she’s gone through life believing that one can only get ahead in life on looks and coolness. So to see her daughter being the complete opposite of that (in her eyes), put her in distress for her future. She was brought to tears by the thought that her daughter might not succeed within the realms of her materialistic world.
Stop you should actually be a lawyer this is so good😭 almost changed my pov
dangit this is good!
Stop, cause this is prolly exactly what happened in that scenario 😭 you’re making me feel bad for the mom!
@@rachandre5996 I recently changed my career path to law school so I appreciate this so much lol
I would feel bad but she clearly being a bully to the daughter so she deserves the comments from her boyfriend. There's no excuse for hurting a innocent kid's happiness and belittling them for your own needs.
The comment Dylan made about watching how people treat other people because that’s how they’re going to treat you actually hit really hard. I’ve been in a few toxic relationships and it seems like such an obvious thing rather than making excuses for them because they’re so good to you, but I don’t think I ever had that realisation. Bless xoxo gossip girl
Don't feel bad! I dated someone for almost four years (which was about three years too long) who was super nice and kind to everyone, but acted like a child in arguments with me and emotionally manipulated and gaslit me every time I had something negative to say about his actions. I guess it's a rare person that's good natured in public and behind closed doors as well. People are tricksters. 🙃
@@RoseTintMyWorld-cr5zo exactly. It sounds like good advice, and it probably is, but it's not always the case. My dad and my sister have personalities where they treat people who are not close very well because they want to be highly regarded and want to be liked by strangers, but the closer you are, the more you get to know them and see them for who they really are, the worse they treat you and the less they regard you.
Everyone always told me my dad was a great guy, generous, responsible, decent, respectable. But he was actually very abusive and neglectful with us, his family. He hated me because I called him out for it in public as a child and was very abusive to me.
My sister is so rude and b!tchy with my mother and myself, she is incredibly uncooperative with us. She lives cost free with my mom, leaves a mess and doesn't help clean or do any chores. She won't do us a simple favor if it even slightly inconveniences her. She left to her boyfriend's house one night and locked out my mom and refused to come back to open the door so my mom could get in. She just told my mom she shouldn't have forgotten her keys if she didn't want to sleep outside. But she bends over backwards and is a completely different person for her friends and acquaintances, it gives me whiplash. She acts very charming and kind towards strangers too. Both my sister and dad love receiving compliments, and I think strangers are more likely to give them because they don't expect much from other strangers, so they can get them more easily by being kind and generous to strangers than to family and people who are really close.
Like if you went out of your way to help family they would say thank you, but a stranger would be more likely to compliment you like, "omg, you are so kind!" "What a sweetheart!" "So generous!" Because they didn't expect it and that one act is all they know about you.
If you think about it, many serial killers were known by their neighbors and acquaintances as being very charming and nice.
I agree completely with the bridesmaid's dresses. If my friend gave me the honor of being part of the wedding, if her court was wearing trash bags, I'd go buy several boxes to see which brand she liked the most. You're doing it for her. I don't know why so many people feel a desire to put their friendships and their friend/family member's wedding in distress over a piece of clothing. This is right up there with all the mother-in-laws and sisters that wear wedding dresses to weddings and act like they had no idea it was a bad idea. Come on.
Simply following orders:
To the mother's defense, I believe that the mother's seemingly "inappropriate" outpouring of emotions was just her showing not only deep concern for her daughter's future and wellbeing, but also remorse for how she treated kids similar to her daughter when she was younger. It's apparent that she was some sort of "mean girl" in high school and she knows of the malicious conversations being had in those circles and all my client wanted to do was spare her daughter from the viciousness that may come from kids in that group, and as many after-school specials and fellow losers on the internet will tell you, bullying leaves an impact well beyond high school.
you’re good
Horror bridesmaid stories make me shake my head so hard like you cannot tell me this is the first time Kat was ever difficult… how did someone this psycho get into the bridal party😭😭
Why the hell should she give her money because she was petty and bought her own dress.
I was thinking that Kat should have paid her (the bride) back for wasting her money on a bridesmaids dress that wasn't even used.
For the 17 year old, it really depends on how they raised him. We only know the dad's side. My parents kept me out of school, isolated me, refused to answer my questions about resumes, jobs, work, actively demonized the world saying it was a horrible place for women and any boss I had would try to hurt me blablabla . . . And then when I got fed up with all that my dad told me to gtfo at 17, which was impossible since they'd given me NO ability to actually do that. It sounds like the mom babies the kid and the dad and her don't communicate and they all sound very strict which isn't great for a kid's psyche. This guy should be consulting a professional like a therapist, not the internet, because this kid has been having issues a long time.
Are you my dad's second family because this sounds exactly like him
@@nbucwa6621 I'm so sorry you can relate T.T
I'm sorry to read that you grew up in that kind of environment.
I agree with your suggestion about consulting a therapist, but not because I picked up any indication of the kid having issues (besides being babied/spoiled by the mom and the potential of him becoming an entitled nightmare adult). I think the parents would benefit from couples/parental counseling. The dad says that he and his wife agreed on how they would raise their children while they were engaged. Also, the deal of "university, job, or move out," had long been established. Though, I do wonder for exactly how long the older sibling had been hearing that. It was established for the younger siblings pretty early, but that doesn't necessarily mean it was for the eldest.
Anyways, Dylan skipped a part (can be read at 19:52) where the dad explains he had the same rule growing up and that he chose to travel around the world sailing (and working) for two years before finally going to university. I had wondered about the tie-in with the grandparents also saying they wouldn't give the kid any money to the eldest unless he was in school or working. The issue seems to be a change of heart and/or lack of ability to keep firm on the mom's part. Still, as Dylan pointed out towards the end, this problem looks like it's only escalating. From my POV*, it could very easily become a contentious subject that causes a rift between the parents.
*My POV as the eldest of two and growing up with a similar rule. My family oscillated between being middle to lower middle class, so there were extra stipulations. First, "covering uni" was complicated by an (unsurprising) out-of-province choice, which turned into covering only the 1st year tuition, covering room & board every year, and co-signing a line of credit. Second, the "get a job" option included having to contribute "rent" to stay at home. Though "rent" was way cheaper than elsewhere, there were still issues with the rule. My parents, also, ran into the problem of consistency with implementation, though they kept a united front. The first problem they had was in being too rigid, trying to apply a blanket parenting approach/rule, and not adapting well to the needs of each child. Second, not checking in with each other before declaring a new element to the rule. Third, blindsiding us kids with the adjustments.
In my mind, the root issue for the reddit parents (and my parents) is a need to learn how to communicate better with each other before bringing anything to the kids. Consistent and regular communication between each other and not assuming that factors won't or can't change previously established agreements.
Yeah that one rubbed me wrong.... especially cuz one, it struck a very personal nerve, and two, kids aren't pushed out of home the second they turn 18 in other countries. America is just kinda weird like that
@checksanity i mean most of your post is repeating what I'd said. Yeah, dad should consult a therapist and he and his wife need to communicate better. Perhaps it's because I've worked with kids for about 15 years professionally, but what I see is this kid's got issues, and this is not new shit. "Being spoiled by mom, nightmare to society" IS a huge issue and it's NOT a child created problem. He clearly does not have the skills needed to leave home. His dad is living in this bubble where what he says is law and will happen despite obvious indications to the opposite (you're really telling me the mom only changed her mind NOW? No way.) and it's biting him in the ass. And as you say about your family, there is no flexibility there. Rigid parents don't make a habit of listening to their kids' needs. They can't even communicate with each other, their kids don't even have a choice or a voice.
Get Out At 18 was a rule in my house as well. But keep in mind that was 18, and my dad wanted to throw me out at 17. Here, that is legally a minor. I had no rights, no license, and nowhere to go. I've got no problem with well communicated, appropriate rules that take into account a child's needs. In a healthy family, a rule like this particular one shouldn't need to be communicated, as kids who are cared for in a healthy way will automatically want to go out and have a healthy connection with the world and start on their future. This kind of rule should only be used in rare cases, such as when a child's needs HAVE been met, their mental state seems sound, perhaps the parents are not as financially set, and the child has shown no progress on anything and is just being lazy. But that should happen at 19 or 20 imo, not the second they turn 18. Otherwise the rule just causes stress, family tension, fear, and a threat that a child may not be ready for.
As someone who’s legally blind in her left eye, 16:15 made me WHEEZE 🤣
As someone who worked in the disability community I saw the “helpful helper” kind of attitude a lot. It’s a matter of teaching them “how” to help and having that conversation of “it’s great you want to help so instead of telling the individual with a disability what you’re doing without their input or immediately helping without being asked - instead ask the disabled person if they need help or what the best way to help them is.” Typically most disabled individuals know their barriers and strengths and know how to work within them with the supports they need. It’s a learning curve for sure for some that don’t realize sometimes auto help is not actually helping.
I mean, there's being helpful and then there's being patronizing. As a woman, I've had men "help" me - and it wasn't helpful, it was them infantilizing me and dismissing my abilities and capablities.
@@LoucheWoman exactly! The disabled individual usually knows themself better than someone else will. And while some “helpers” intentions may be “good” - it ultimately isn’t if you’re not actually helping and just removing the autonomy of the other individual
Listen on the bridesmaid, ain’t no way I embarrassed you especially when I told you it would be ok to change later wear the shit dress for my official wedding pic then change for the after party that’s not that hard in fact it was so obvious you though of it yourself (kinda)
LMAO you're so petty
@@luthimoon3333 nah they have a point
the husband shading his wife like that... absolutely tf not. I'm surprised she didn't fight him lol
the bridesmaid one is irritating bc she could’ve just declined to be part of the bridal party if it was that big of an issue. she should have asked if she could wear the black dress and taken the no she got.
That story with the 17 year old either getting a job, university or gtfo, sometimes it’s the best thing to do. If the kid has no issues right, like a disability or something, the least they could do is get a job. My aunt did this with some of her kids where they were incredibly lazy and it wasn’t until she kicked them out that they started to be productive humans, they got their own places, have better lives than they would at my aunts, and now have a good relationship with my aunt.
Ryan is the best textbook study of the resucer mentality. The people who think they are "helping" others but in reality only care about apperances and other peoples opinions, not the person they are actually supposed to be helping.
Dylan seems to have achieved such a major milestone in his career. He has served as a major inspiration for all of us here. He deserves all the great things in his life.
And to believe he’s only 20 years old, truly inspiring
About the last one, i feel like the wife's father has been very controlling/abusive for most of her life so she didn't side with her husband out of fear. She didn't support the decision but was too afraid to say anything
Yup. A lot of situations like this in my family, so I'm certain that's what's happening here
Ah, the best Reddit series has returned!
This does put a smile on my face
I wish he never stops this series
The one about the blind lady is so frustrating. I get he wants to be helpful, but if people don't ask for help, they don't need it. My boyfriend's mum is blind and she can cook, clean, do whatever she needs to do very well. She sometimes needs help knowing where objects are when walking, but generally she can do stuff for herself and doesn't need help. It's very frustrating to be treated like you're incompetent all the time and that guy needs to stop trying to be helpful.
Wow, this guy is so emotionally aware for a 20-yr-old
Dylan and Joe are the PERFECT comedy combo. I was cracking up through the entire video :'DD
Re: pregnant woman v dog story - I think Not the Asshole because, although they aren’t human, dogs are just as much a part of the family as anyone else. If you re-homed the dog, it would probably experience some emotional pain (on the level that dogs experience emotions of course). also, does the child not matter? what about the depression and anxiety the CHILD might experience from his best friend being taken away? maybe there’s some sort of middle ground solution of the dog always being kept in another room from her or the dog staying with grandparents of friends only for the pregnancy? but the dad/husband is not the A-hole for not just bending to her demands
As someone that grew up with a controlling narcissist it does really turn you into a people pleaser type person that "deals with" the problem person to not cause waves.... best thing to do is go NC I did that and am living mt best life now trying to undo my pleaser personality 😅
From one random person to another, good for you and I hope you get to enjoy the small things :)
The way Dylan went from talking like John Mulaney to a British orphan when reading the Kat Bridesmaid story CRACKED ME THE FUCK UP 😂😂
he somehow reads my mind and posts whenever im feeling low to lift up my mood. love you dylan, youre fucking awesome and i love being a fan of yours.
SAME I LOVE HIM SO MUCH. He always posts when i need him the most
good luck bud
I will be representing my client, The Crying Wife, in this hypothetical thought experiment.
I would like to start off by reminding everyone that the couple had only been together a year. A year is simply not enough time to get to know all their insecurities, and fears, etc.
Here the boyfriend comes over. Sees his girlfriend vulnerable, clearly upset, and he asks her what is wrong and asks if he can help. When she gives him an answer, choosing to trust and rely on her boyfriend, he does anything but help.
Normally women don't break down over these kinds of things. She clearly must have some deeper, unresolved issues that are being projected on her daughter. Her issues are making her perceive her daughter's life differently.
And was it not you, Dylan, who said that if a person was "coming from good intentions" , that continuing to say things to them might not sink in because they "have their own worldview, where they're the good guy" and that you can't tell them "they're the bad guy for being too good of a guy?"
My client simply carries a lot of unusual emotional attachment to her life in her high school days. She clearly wants what's best for her daughter, and in her worldview derived from her deeper issues, her daughter can't possibly be as happy if she isn't doing exactly what her mum did.
On top of this, in your '17 Again' commentary, you did state that if a person is "in their mid 30's and go back to their highschool to reminisce on the good days- yikes man". And as we all know here, Dylan, you are never wrong. So she clearly had something deeper going on.
My client was simply unaware of how she came across. She was in a state of upset and wouldn't be too consumed by her worries to focus on how the other person, her boyfriend I'll remind you, is going to perceive them. Without even giving her a chance to defend herself, explain her true intentions and have him see she was coming from a good place, he shut her down.
She didn't need an "unselfish" wake up call, she just needed some help.
Underrated comment 🙏🏻
You should be a lawyer, this is great
@Summer Butler Haha thank you, but I'd have to go to college then and risk it being a scam
@@MayJay1812 Get this person to the top of the page for this reply!!!
Ahahaha this is great
Hahaha this is so good, it’s brilliant 😂🙏🏼
Dylan: you can't wear a summer dress at christmas
Also Dylan: if I was getting married in winter I'd do a summer theme
The mother has extreme trauma from our patriarchal society and during her schooling years in order to be at the top of the food chain you had to be the stereotypical mean girl. This mindset hasn’t broken and she is worried that her child will not succeed in life (like getting a husband to look after her) and therefore is only looking out for her daughters best interest. I tried😂
the best attempt that I've read so far
when my mom asked me to be her MOH she told me she didn't care what color I wore, i was the only other person in the wedding besides the best man. I still had her come with me to get a dress bc I wanted her approval. if it's their special day you should respect their wishes when it comes to dress code
This is a reminder that Jo is the best editor out there
dylan: if i had a wedding...
the editor: he won't
😭