😀Thanks for keeping the conversation going here everyone! These are some really cool and important dialogues. And since a few people asked, here is link to Mike’s lille fredag shirt from our merch store 👕: bit.ly/33tekMp
I find it petty that most Danes are so defensive on the point of language , for her to get an international job, she is aware that she does not come to Denmark and find everything in English ( international language) but that it was a struggle for her and made it difficult to integrate , which is fair. That is her personal experience and perspective. We call ourselves tolerant and open until someone points out something we don’t like. The reactions are a little sad but not surprising.
I watch videos from the woman's channel who you have quoted herein too. She IS interesting, isn't she? Say, moving to France or Germany is no harder in terms of having to learn the native language than moving to Denmark, if only because so many Europeans are stunningly multi-lingual -- I mean, it's kind pseudo-disgusting, actually, haha. Now, I was in both countries for a few months and could get by without knowing how to speak French (or German) fluently. Now, I know French fairly well and knew German not at all (back when I was there but have since learnt to speak some sentences in German) but, I still can assure you that knowing just English will not unduly handicap anyone. Now, I would not recommend LIVING in anywhere foreign, without learning the native language of that place, but, staying anywhere in Europe for just a month or two, won't set you back to any crazy degree, I don't reckon anyway again because so many Euros can speak English to some degree, which frankly makes we Yanks look rather provincial because many Americans do not speak a foreign language, with any degree of proficiency, at all.
Its the outlook you come with. You guys are much more open to other cultures. She needs to lighten up and look at the cup halv full and not half empthy. And London - thats funny. 😂
I have not lived permanently in Denmark since 1991. I have lived and worked all over the world since then and are currently living and working in Singapore. That was just how my life panned out due to work. I never considered weather at all no matter where I lived and worked. Of course, if you have dreams of chatting up people in the street, you may get into serious trouble in many countries. When you befriend a Dane, you will usually have a friend for life. Friendship is a pretty serious thing for most Danes. She is correct when she describes it is easier to befriend people in southern Europe. However, you are also much more likely to end up being conned in southern Europe (of course, this is not a rule but it happens much more often there compared to northern Europe). When I was an apprentice, I had to be at work 7 o'clock in the morning and workday ended 4 o'clock in the afternoon. During winter, I never really experienced daylight during weekdays. I never really considered that a problem. I guess it depends on your mental strength. I am aware that many people probably get depressed easier than I do (which is vertically never).
Honestly, I agree with a lot of her points, and understand why it would be difficult to navigate in a foreign society while also handling these frustrations. What I don't like is her attitude. It seems to me that she sees these things as flaws in Danish society, rather than simply the facts of living in a foreign country. She seems to be of the opinion that Danes and Denmark should change and cater to her, rather than the other way around
@@RobeTrotting definitely, she should've done some research. I feel like she expected something completely different and based her experience on that. It's a bit sad that her experience was like that because of her expectations..
Excactly, her attitude is horrible. And you are spot on, she seems like she expect the country and people to cater to her, she expect things to be like where she came from instead of enjoying the differences and actually trying.. she Seem a bit spoiled and narrowminded. And for a extremely pale person, it dosnt Seem like she have a Strong relationship with sun and hot weather. And truthfully, we have Better weather than London.
Getting friends in Scandinavia is a bit like joining a biker gang. You start off being a hang around, someone who's presence is tolerated. You won't be invited to parties, but you might join the group when they're out. Next phase, if you make it thru the first one, is the Prospect phase. That's when you get invited to some functions, but not all. In this phase they get to know you deeper, the conversation gets less shallow. Made it thru that? Then you're a full fledged member of the group and will have friends for life. People you can call, or who might call you, in the middle of the night, and will share their deepest thoughts and secrets with you.
"3 Things They Don't Tell You" are LITERALLY the first things we tell you.... 1) Denmark is in Danish just as Germany is in German. 2) Danes are laid back, direct to the point of bluntness and socially self sufficient. 3) We hate the winter too. But the endless light in summer makes up for it.
@@NaedynWhat are you on about? I agree that we tend to avoid confrontation because it can be uncomfortable, but we are definitely not shy about resolving conflicts when they arise.
I also find it super annoying that when I travel to another country that there isn't a single sign in Danish, and they talk another language than Danish 🙄
@@KurtFrederiksen I went to Paris for a week on a high school trip back when I was a teenager. My friends and I were in a store and were talking about the couple in front if us in Danish … then heard them talking Danish to each other 😅 Luckily we weren’t saying anything horrible but we definitely embarrassed ourselves haha 😂
@@KurtFrederiksen ohh I have I childhood memory from kreta (Greece). My mum wanted to buy me my first watch and the lady in the store was kinda of a jerk. And my mom was shit talking her in Danish. When we left the store she said in perfect Danish "ha en forsat go dag" she was a Danish exchange student.q On same holiday I was sitting in the edge on the waves on the beach. And a mom and daughter came up. They was taking pictures, (I'm really dark for a dane). The mom said in Danish get a bit to the rigth so we can get the local kid in the picture, I just completely ignored it. They took the picture, and I just looked at them and asked where they where from in Denmark, the mom completely freak out.😂😂😂😂😂
My problem with the video is really the framing. The problem wasn’t “I wasn’t prepared for how difficult living in a country with a different language is” it’s “It’s all in Danish”. But that isn’t even a problem, a country using it’s own language is not a “problem”. Same thing with the making friends bit, again it wasn’t “they have a very different way of socializing, and I found it hard to adjust ” it’s “unlike me, they are antisocial” which is just kinda offensive on the face of it. Especially coming from someone who apparently failed at making any friends in 4,5 years of living here. I think her issues are pretty valid, I get where she’s coming from, but the approach is just so off putting, and it makes sympathizing a lot harder.
Yes she appears totally naive and clueless, even though the points she makes are valid as being difficult for her . At the end she inserts that she finally accepted the fact that she cannot adapt to living with a different language , in a nordic country . Ok - she made the right decision for her. It’s that she presents it in this aggrieved way that makes her seem weird.
I was very surprised when I visited New York from Sweden that no one spoke Swedish anywhere! Everything was in English only, quite outrageous how they didn't have everything in Swedish as well... 🤔😂
😂 Right! So wild haha. Actually, kinda funny thing, Derek grew up in New Sweden (southeastern Pennsylvania) and didn't realize it until years later. All the city names and street names with Swedish roots - it's pretty cool to drive around the area when we're back in the States and connect names to Sweden.
@@RobeTrotting Maybe he's even part Swedish then? 😅 I've heard that the Swedes brought their own culture to the US and Swedish was actually spoken for many maaaany years as the first language in those communities. It makes sense that they gave Swedish names to places 😁
@@MaN2Mega A lot of Swedish immigrants actually moved to Minnesota. The reason their National Football League team is called the Minnesota Vikings is in reference to the Scandinavian heritage of the region.
I would like to stress the point that if you are an English speaker and you are going to move to a foreign country, then Denmark is one of the easiest places to move to because virtually everyone speaks English.
I can see her point about getting to know new people. But then again in Scandinavia we might seem more reserved than in other countries, but it is highly possible to get friendships as a foreigner if you put the mind into it, and try to adapt to the new culture and social norms. And really just show interest in us and the danish society. It's totally fair she figured out that her values and lifestyle didn't aline with the 'harsh' realities of living in Denmark. But to be honest, she just seems extremely unprepared about moving to another country, with an entirely different language, and different culture than what she was accustomed to. She didn't really have realistic expectations to begin with. Her reasoning about why she moved to London was due to shitty weather and the cold climate in Denmark is just beyond any logic to me. Britain is at almost the same latitude as Denmark. Guess which country is notoriously known for having 'bad' weather? 😅
Social life as an immigrant is limited everywhere. We immigrants have to stick together. There is no way around that! (Unless you've married to the country and just use the social network of your spouse. But that has its own disadvantages.) And absolutely no-one denies that the Nordic countries belong to the worst in this respect.
@@jmolofsson Not really, the problem is not making friends it's how you make friends, in Denmark atleast. Join a club, get a hobby and join a group, do a sport - that's how we make friends after the educational system, bonding over a common interest. It's not about being better or worse, it's a different culture.
Britain has bad weather. As a Londoner, even speaking English will not mean you make friends easily in London, as people tend to be reserved and wary, given the large city of 8m souls. If this lady is going to London and thinks she can stop random people…good luck! Even northerners (from northern England) complain how stand offish Londoners can be.
Så sandt sandt du har ret i det hele. Hvorfor flytte til et land du ikke har studeret før du flytter der til det er jo latterligt og vildt uforberedt. Man kan heller ikke forvente at alle lande er som ens eget og gør præcis det samme som ens eget så man sku da naiv. Studer klatten først!😊
Imagine moving to a foreign country and not wanting to learn their language. You can eat their food, but is it really there where it stops? - Come on now. If you are only here because of work, then sure, but no one asked you to come live here. Denmark is not where you retire, you work and on top of that you have all these expections of people. Alot of my friends and myself speaks 3-7 languages, not only because we need to or have to, but because we want to, so it's easier to communicate. Alot of people in europe learns multiple languages and they may never even get to visit those countries or ever speak the language. The danes are hard workers, just like yourself. They have an 8 to 4 job, gotta pick up their kids after and cook dinner, then enjoy the few hours they have left of their day with the family before a new day starts. If you wanna befriend a dane, you gotta figure out what hobbies you have in common, but deeper friendships takes time, not only just here. Besides from the rest of the world needs to learn english, what more do you want from us? Jeez Have a good one in England
7 languages?! You're either lying or you and your friends are extremely good at languages (but looking at your grammar I think not). Even 3 is a lot if you actually speak them well. Knowing a couple of phrases does not qualify as speaking a language..
@@nielsliljedahlchristensen4924 oh wow mr. Perfect Grammar. I speak, to varying degree, 4 languages and understand a couple more. Am I PERFECT in those languages? No, geez. But I can make conversation and be fairly sure I'm understood. I guess that's not perfect enough though?
I don t get why you guys get so offended by a video of a woman who simply said what was true for her. Can t you just accept that Denmark is not destination number one for many people? She didn t offend anyone 😅
I lived in Denmark for around 4.5 years and I think the experience is very dependent on how you are integrated. Being in a couple, with the support associated, is probably a much better way to land in Denmark than solo. I was lucky because I was a student at UCPH and circled by people who were used to foreigners. It is also very dependent on the willingness to integrate and adopt the culture and society. Honestly, there were times that I was very lonely but, after meeting my husband and starting a family, my experience changed so much. I loved learning the language and am still homesick for Denmark, even 14 years after returning to Canada (we moved here for my husband's academic career). I was blessed with great friends and a lovely experience, although other people that I knew were not able to connect socially. PS: I still watch DR2 and listen to DR4 and DR8... and I am still in contact with my Danish friends.
I have to be honest, the 'frustration' over moving to a foreign country , and then having to learn a foreign language spoken in that country in order to get by completely baffles me. Yes, it can be hard, but it's an inevitable by-product of your decision to go to said country; it's as if I were frustrated over water being wet. Being from Europe, you're also mostly just used to quickly hopping over from one neighbour to the next and encountering a totally different language, so I guess I can comprehend why this is a hard pill to swallow for Americans especially, when they are mostly surrounded by the comfort of only having to speak English throughout their lives. Anyways, I do not understand this kind of mentality and sense of entitlement, and if anything I'm glad for it. One more thing; no, it is not 'frustrating' to learn a new tongue, when I moved to the UK and had to learn English for the first time, I was not frustrated: I was desperate to pick it up as quickly as possible, so I won't have to live as a secondary citizen - relying on others. If somebody is not ready to take on this kind of commitment, put their own egos aside, and deal with the discomfort of not being recognised via their native language; then it's better staying put where you are. Moving to a new country can be very humbling, but rewarding at the same time. Also, Denmark and the Danes are great!🇩🇰
I totally agree. The discomfort of being out of your element is okay and welcomed, it's when we expect to be comfortable that we are unhappy as migrants. Language learning is a tool and .... an inevitability if you want to feel at home! I agree, Denmark is awesome.
I actually get a bit angry that she puts such a big point in the Danish language being everywhere. I mean … seriously? Being from a country with such a small language we Danes need to actually learn other language to be able to go anywhere else. What’s the problem?
@@PepsiMaGs I agree, this woman makes me very angry. Who does she think she is that everyone should conform to her? She's extremely stupid and was unprepared and went to Denmark with her big ego, thinking everything has to be her way. Nothing she says makes sense to me -- she's just enormously arrogant. Denmark is amazing and so are the Danes. Good ridence of bad rubbish like the English would say. Hope she doesn't get wet in London!!
I think she ended up in a perfect storm of feeling alone and not speaking the language, and thus not having anything to do with her friends in the winter months. But it's probably harder for her, because she was alone. You have a great advantage of having each other :)
We don't know how much she tried to approach people though. I'm an introvert and have a hard time making friends in general, but at work you can try approaching someone maybe?
You’re right for sure, we are super lucky to have each other. We met a lot of friends individually though from separate Danish classes and sports teams that also make me feel like it’s very possible to crack through to friendships without being fluent in Danish. Still, it’s been a lot easier having each other for support (or when we’re bored haha).
@@myra0224 That's a thing I've heard from other foreigners here om RUclips. We don't really socialize that much with our colleagues outside of work here in DK (apparently not like they do in the US). It's like she said: We have friends that we have known since like kindergarten, and it's hard to break into a group like that without being too pushy (especially for us introverts) . Making new friends is so hard as an adult.
@@majaaxholt1927 I understand that, it's the same here in Belgium, but she just had such a bad attitude, basically blaming Denmark and the Danes for not being up her ass... Idk, that just doesn't sit right with me...
You guys, I wonder if you even realize how positive and curious you are in general?! It's so inspiring to see how you take responsibility for succeeding in living abroad without sugarcoating the difficulties of it. I mean seriously, this is the best thing about your channel. It's also the reason you're not two steps away from running away from us Danes. Kudos!!!
Wow, Kia that is such a huge compliment. Thank you SO much for the kind words. We do try to strike that balance that you describe, so it means a lot that it comes through 😊🇩🇰
@@RobeTrotting a smile always help - and she looks like someone who took a bite of a lemon ;-) waching your videos alweys make me smile because you smile a lot
Feels pretty entitled to move to a country where you know they have their own language and list that as a negative. Then on top of that it's a country where most people speak English! Can't imagine her reaction to moving to China, Japan, etc. As you both said, not sure what she expected. I wonder if she ever extrapolated how she felt with her frustration to what it must be like for someone not born in a privileged position in society. She got a job in Denmark then moved there. Imagine what it must be like for someone making minimum wage (or less in some cases) who is a refugee, with a family, trying to just scrape by without knowing the language? Learning a language is hard, so I completely get why that would frustrate her but the entire video comes off very privileged to me.
I see that point for sure. We often say that when we discuss things that are tricky about Denmark, that we had SO much better of a situation than some foreigners living here and we have a homeland we can return too. It puts things in perspective for sure.
She should just try and move to Germany or France, not to mention Italy or Spain. If she thought she had a hard time here, she'd be completely lost everywhere else.
LOL had the same POV. I went to Italy. Big country. Own language. Nothing was in English back then - guessing it has not changed much, though. However, I had to put in the hours to learn the language, because they did NOT speak English. I had a blast😊 making mistakes every single day, but the Italians loved that I put in the effort, and so do we in Denmark. You don't have to be fluent but get big credit for trying 👍😊
She actually explains in the original video why is frustrating (in here was cut) so I advice you to check it before making this coment. Also if don't live or ever try to ear danish I advice you to do so. And let's put this fun fact: danish children at 3 have the least vocabulary of all the languages because of how hard is to speak danish. So yeah it's frustrating to learn danish.
For any foreigners wanting to make friends in Denmark, hobbies is a big part of how Danes makes friends. "Foreningslivet" is acctive and you need to find something that you can connect with people over, be it sports, the arts or flying model planes.
I am italian and yes, we are very welcoming and warm and it is fairly easy to connect with us generally speaking, but to integrate in our society you must be able to speak italian. 😅😅😅 I think we should appreciate the fact that most Danes can speak fluent english, thing that does not happen with Italians 🤷🏼♀️😂 Loved the video guys ❤️
@@kbhprinsesse I would say if you speak italian you can integrate everywhere. I would consider more the quality of life tbh. Northern cities offers more job opportunities, better infrastructures and services but they might be hectic and really career oriented ( e.g Milan ), harder to make friends etc. Southern cities are more relaxed and people are more friendly, but you might struggle to live a decent life. Not sure about your goals, but I wouldn't invest in living in Italy, sorry to say that because it's my country, but that's how I feel after years of living abroad.
As a Brazilian who lived in Italy for 8 years, I can confirm. ❤ Now I've been living in Germany for 5 years, do not speak German and even if the level of English here is higher than in Italy, if you don't speak the local language you'll not integrate.
@@kbhprinsesseMilan is akin to Denmark, as far as close-knit friends circles are concerned. In the North we tend to be more reserved and diffident to strangers.
If you want to make friends in Denmark don't approach them on the street. Friends are (for the most part) someone you have something in common with, so that will be a sport, hobby or something else (like the lgbt community)
Anytime I'm out in the street, that means I have stuff to do. Be it exercise, shopping or travelling, and that means, if you chat me up, you're interrupting whatever I'm doing. If you need help, that's fine, all of us need help from time to time, but if you're just trying to talk, you're kinda in the way. If you want to chat us up, do it at an event like theater, movies, sport events or whatever you enjoy as a hobby. We open up more if your icebreaker is relevant.
I think Americans have a hard time with Scandinavians because it's an introverted country. The US highly values extroverts, and they are shocked that a country would reverse that. As an American introvert, living in an extroverted country can be exhausting. Taking the quiet, patient route to relationships is a skill to be learned.
@@karsten69 100% this!!!! If you meet me on the street, I'm prolly on my way from point A to point B, and yeah, you trying to chat me up = you're delaying me. Not that it's necessarily a bad thing, but if we can talk while walking (while also walking towards my next destination), kudos to you! :) Sure, I'll be happy to help you, if I can, but you also have to ask for it, not just stand there looking lost.
As a Dane previously living 3 years in London, I can only say: you’ll be disappointed girl……..except for similarities to your native language, but with huge variations…
The Nordic Melancholy is real. Until you try living through a Nordic winter, you really have no clue if you can handle it. Personally I love the cold and dark. You two seem to be handling it on. But I know people that go into deep depression every winter. For those people, mocking south is a very good option. The other option is to stay, dress in black and write depressive poetry. Getting a good circle of friends in Denmark can also be quite hard. A friend of mine from the UK spent a very lonely year as a consultant in Copenhagen. It is never going to be his favorite place after that. I only met him at the end of that year. I think some of it is the work attitude. You go home at five, and you normally don't want to hang around your colleagues after work. You rarely go a out for beers or eating with them. I worked in Spain for a while, and people would hang out after work much more than its common here. Finally, the language. It is important. I have realized that it functions as a kind of password - a Shibboleth. If someone comes up and speaks Danish to me, I feel that he is "one of us" and I give him a level of trust and cooperation, I would hesitate to give to a stranger. Still, how often do you need the cooperation of strangers? If you prioritize getting some good friends, they are really all you need in that way. You will not get strangers from the street to help paint your house. But your friends will still help you without you ever having to learn a word of danish. So being social instead of focusing on language lessons is definitely the right choice.
Yeah, those are all great points. Friends are important to make early on and the language and other aspects of life can come in later. It’s hard to make friends at work, so getting involved with something else is key. Thanks for adding these points - very helpful 😊🇩🇰
I have experienced a single person, probably a student, that was very willing to help in Tokyo. Same has happened in Amsterdam, but he was probably homeless, since he indicated that a little tip would be helpful. My impression as a dane in Denmark is that nobody will ever ask if you need help. If you do have the courage to ask for help, people will follow you to the door (and make sure you got to the right place). But if you just stand there looking lost and confused, people have better things to do. We're like eggs, thin shell, but once you break it, it flows out in excess.
I've lived Greenland for just shy of a decade, and we have a saying, that winter is for sleep and rest, and summer is for fun and play which often involves finishing and hunting 😊🇬🇱
Coming from a hot and humid country one of the best things I appreciate in DK, are the 4 seasons. I love the summer when the daylight is long, the autumn when the leaves of the trees change their colors, the spring when the trees begins to grow their leaves again and even the dark grey winter has it's own beauty especially when there's snow. I've lived here in 27 years and yes it's difficult to make friends in the beginning as the danes seems so aloof towards a stranger, but once you get to know them, hvem you have friends for life 🙂. As for the language, yes danish is a difficult language but if one is prepared to learn a new language and a new culture then that challenge is easy to overcome. As a foreigner coming to a new country then you should prepare to adapt, after all if you're a guest don't expect your hosts to bend their rules for you, you should be the one abide by their rules.
As a foreigner coming to a new country then you should prepare to adapt, after all if you're a guest don't expect your hosts to bend their rules for you, you should be the one abide by their rules........ totaly agree an that is the same in every country Denmark, US, UK ,Russia, china, brasil.
As a British guy who has lived in Denmark for over 25 years, her points are all valid. I moved here because of a Danish girlfriend and my entire first network of friends came from her. My second network of friends came from the Danish woman I eventually married. Only in one place of work did I establish a network of friends that endured afterwards. Danes are incredibly introverted (anti-social isn't the right word) and suspicious of new people. Language wasn't an issue for me as I'm a linguist anyway and had started learning Danish before moving there. Being British, the weather wasn't a problem either. But moving to London.... LMFAO.
Yeah, the moving to London was too funny. It sounds like you did pretty well for yourself here though. The “work friends” thing is definitely a bit different for Americans, but we really like having that unspoken separation. It’s refreshing to keep work more compartmentalized.
Danes are introverted, but I think alot of danes expect others to initiate relationships... much like a ship leaves shores looking for a city to conquer :P
The first one is gonna be the case no matter where you go... As a Dane i wouldn't expect anything to be in Danish either if i went to America. Granted way more people speak english/american all over the world, but nobody should simply "expect" anything in their own language no matter where they go.
Well, entitled people would. The interesting question one could ask her was this. If she expects everything to be in English, how does she feel about the idea that everything in the US should be in French... it's just as big a language globally. She's just an ignorant American thinking that everything should cater to her needs because the US is the centre of the universe. She didn't last in Denmark, and she won't last anywhere else.
That struck me as a very entitled approach to language too. I have not seen all her video, but in the clip here it came off as "Why don't they write things in /my/ language anywhere away from the airport? That is so tiring" (where I would have been much more understanding of "it turned out to be too big an effort for me to learn the language well enough for the way I want/need to interact with it"). I think it comes from having grown up with being able to speak your own language with most adults in most countries - as opposed to knowing that the moment you step outside your own country's borders, basically no one would understand you, and you had to rely on your parents to help, or do what you could with gestures (until you learned the relevant language later in life). We just wouldn't dream of being accommodated like that abroad, because we've never tried it.
What?! You're telling me everything in Denmark is in Danish?! How can I ever overcome this challenge.. 🤔 Jokes aside, great idea for a video! Totally agree also that if you don't understand something, Danes are always 100% happy to help! There were a few times in the beginning where I was in public somewhere just LOOKING confused and people approached ME to help 😂
Yeah, it took us a while to realize that we could approach people in english and it was actually less confusing than a poorly pronounced “taler du englsk?”
She’s got to be kidding. Right? Big big surprise that you have to learn the language of the country you move to. But almost every danish person under the age of 50 knows English. The danish winter is dreadful, but the long summer nights are amazing. Have to admit, I laughed when she said she moved to London :-) great vid guys
Agree. I’m almost tempted to say, “typical American”. Expecting everything to be in English everywhere else in the world just because she’s from America and thinks the entire Universe revolves around her home country… *sigh*
There is a French-Canadian living in Norway that have written several books about how to integrate into Norwegian society - Julien S Bourelle. You can find several of his video here on RUclips. He says that Norwegian makes friends with activities, and not randomly or thru work. So like you guys said you met a lot of friends thru your sports teams and Danish classes. Your coworkers are only people you interact with 8-16 Monday to Friday, and you "leave them behind" when you leave the office. It looks like the Danes and Norwegians are very similar in this behaviour.
The reason is, you don't choose your coworkers, you get forced to be around them, but you choose your spare time activities, and by that the people you socialize with in a more free environment. The day you get fired from your job, you also get fired from your coworkers, and you don't get a choice in that matter.
@@RobeTrotting there is "foreninger"/clubs for everything in denmark, its just about joining one that concern your hobbies or interests and then socializing there, at some point there will be a social event at the forening with alcohol and there even the most stuckup introvert will eventually take on the extrover hat.
In none of my many trips to the US - or any other foreign country - have I ever heard a public announcement in Danish or seen any signs in my native language. I haven't been to Greenland and they might provide such a service (being part of the Danish realm) but then again they would probably refrain out of nationalism. However, I love the way Americans chat on the street and whenever there's a chance to exchance a joke or a friendly remark, and I do that all the time back here (to the disgrace of my grown children).
Yes 🙌🏼 you need to adopt the mindset or you will be miserable instead of enjoying the nice part of a slower pace and intimate times with people you care about.
So true. Winter is for inside hygge. Streaming good shows, Reading good books, and sorting your stamp collection, or whatever hobby you have. True that you better make the most of the hours of sunlight we do get. Let the sun shine on your face when it’s there, so you get a bit of light and warmth once in a while. Really, when you see how much people love the spring and the summer, you know why we need to have winters. I can not imagine living in a country where the sun rises and sets every 12 hours and there are no seasons. Perhaps you have to be made for it.
@@dortheschlelein5000 Exactly! We need to have contrasts in the seasons to really appreciate the hell out of it, when it gets good. I mean, look a every single Danish park, when the first sunny day of spring hits :)
I have been living in Denmark for 5 years. I have to say I agree with most things you guys say. Regarding learning Danish: I started Danish lessons as soon as I arrived but my teacher was terrible! I got very frustrated, only in 2020 I decided to study in a different school that I paid out my pocket and after a year I felt confident enough but it does drain a lot of your time. Before moving to DK I lived in London for 4 years. The weather is definitely not as windy and a tad warmer but it was an definitely an unexpected turn in the story lol. I thought she was going to say somewhere in the south of Europe or like Florida haha Nice vid guys.
I am from Argentina I used to live in Utah then for personal reasons move back to South America. I lived like a year in Argentina, my home country, and finally move to Paraguay and I live here for almost 4 years. ok thats the whole picture, in Argentina I felt like a stranger like is not my home that's one of the reasons I move out the first time, now I am in Paraguay, my whole family lives here and I have never felt more alone than now. Both countries speak Spanish and I speak Spanish, so we all understand each other but yet not real friends. All places have their challenges all depends on what attitude we have. Now I am getting ready to try Denmark. I love your channel.
Great video and analysis! Having studied, worked, lived, and traveled worldwide, I have chosen to move to Denmark for all the reasons she is leaving! I love languages and love the culture and people of Denmark. I am working hard on my Danish now so that I have a springboard to living there.
Honestly it varies from year to year. Some recent years it's been like late dark fall from September to March with not many days of blue sky. There's more days with blue sky when the winter is colder.
I think what can make a danish winter seem especially dark, is the lack of snow... Its far up north to become really dark for an extended period, but too far down to really get any snow to light up the darkness.
I agree, the winter weather is not the selling point of Denmark. I love every other season. I still have problems with the danish’s language before getting coffee in the morning. So my wonderful danish husband serves me coffe in bed every morning. He’s one in many millions and I found him in Denmark 🇩🇰 😺❤️
Thanks for a good video. I'm Danish, so naturally I love the cold short days 🙂 That being said, I'm currently living as an expat in India, and I am struggling with the exact same things: Learning the local language, making "real" friends, and getting used to the weather. (unfortunately no "language school" here)
I remember seeing her video a year back. I can definitely relate to her points and especially if you are going through a hard time, it can exacerbate the experience. I have a few friends who have left the country, do to various hardships - but have reflected, when visiting again, that their private situation was the main course for their experience. One even came back again and is now happily living here. But most important we are all responsible for our own happiness, so cudos to her for taking the necessary action to gain hers
To cope with the nordic winter, you have to get the right mindset. Its about contrasts. From the cold and dark outside to the warm and cousy inside. And when the light comes back in spring. The light summer nights are so much more welcome because of the dark winter. The language barrier is the same everywhere. You have to learn the lokal dominant language. You can start learning before you move. Watching movies with subtitles to get an ear for the sounds. Learning the basic words and sentences on an online course. A good way to meet a nordic person outside their tight group of friends since childhood is to get a hobby and join an organisation for it. A sports club, outdoor organisation, cooking, crafts, building boats... There are organisations and clubs for about everything. As long as you bring something to the table you are welcome.
I heard a radio show on DR discussing the difficulties of becoming friends with danes, and that it is the number one reason why many immigrants feel frustrated and ready to give up. One of the visiting professors compared it to the ketchup effect. You squeeze and squeeze and nothing happens, and then all of a sudden, you get waaaaay more than you bargained for! If you're unaware of this, then your stay here can easily become very miserable. I think it was a very clever decision you made by chosing to get friends instead of learning danish. The few times you need more than a rudimentary understanding of danish, as you mention, you can find someone to help you out. I'm actually surprised this is not _the_ first thing discussed of danish culture, when you're taking classes.
Hey Ole, the analogy you mentioned is perfect! That’s definitely what it’s like, and the Danish friends we met from doing activities instead of classes have become super close - all the ketchup 😂 Now we need to go back to Danish classes and pass the test so we can apply for permanent residency.
@@RobeTrotting those tests are not as difficult as some try to make them seem. My wife delayed the culture test for more than a year than she needed to, and when she finally took it and passed with a good score she asked "was that all?" she managed the Danish test fine too (not splendid, but good enough to pass)... She had been way too afraid of the tests. I believe that they work by intimidation. If you're good at memorising the material they give you, you hardly need to take lessons.
Here's an example of social cultural divergence. I work at a large IT company, that has offices around the globe, with the main offices in Denmark and some in the UK. In my job I get a lot of calls from a lot of people - when a danish employee calls me, it's quite direct and to the point - unless we know eachother quite well beforehand. When someone from the british offices call, it has to start with formalities, "Hi how are you", "Thank you for your time - I really appriciate it." etc --- and it's nice and a cultural gesture. But a call with a brit takes up to four times longer than with a dane - for the same conversational content. And the funny part I've heard it mentioned so many times from my danish colleagues - because these calls are just intended as simple question, like you're asking the guy next to you at work.
A friend of mine from Britain once told me that as a native speaker of English, learning Danish is really difficult because we tend to switch to English the minute someone struggles.
If she thinks Danish winters are tough, try Canada. As for the language, I spent a few years in France. You just learn it. I don't think Danish is particularly tough to read. Pronunciation is infamously difficult, but otherwise it's very close to English. It's not like learning Japanese or Finnish.
Well thats because english is made up from 80% old danish. Also the massive influenze the vikings had over english langauge. there is still places in england that has danish names to this day.
Canada still has more sunlight in the winter being further south ( anything south of Edmonton in any case) plus you still get snow which light everything up - huge plus! :)
I watched the video previously and remembered the point about winter. As a Finn I found it rather hard to relate, but what was really peculiar was that she then moved to London, which is not known for sunny winters.
I remember a lot of the comments under her video were mocking her choice to move basically laterally to get a different weather lol I have a lot of difficulty sympathizing with her to be honest.
I think that part makes perfect sense, actually: 1) People react differently to the darkness and dreariness. Some born and bred Danes also struggle with winter depression here, while others are fine. And when a friend of mine moved to Greenland to work for 3 years, he said that they knew up there that a certain percentage had to give up because they just couldn't cope with the constant darkness (he was one of them and had to give up after a few months and break his contract). Knowing with your mind what the weather is like and that it is quite dark does not mean that you know how you will react to it emotionally. 2) In Finland I guess you have more snow than we do in Denmark? Snow really does an amazing job at brightening up everything in spite of little sun, and I absolutely love the few days (sometimes, if we're lucky, weeks) when we have snow covering the ground here instead of just 5 months of dreary November.
Hi Mike and Derek! Thanks so much for this reaction video! ❤️ It's always fun watching unbiased reactions to my content. I believe we agree that the challenges I faced in Denmark are challenges you continue to face, but I'm delighted to hear that it's not taking away from your enjoyment of Denmark 🇩🇰. As I've mentioned on numerous occasions, Denmark is a wonderful country with many positive aspects to it. A point about the title of the video. Sadly knowing these things intellectually before you arrive and actually feeling their effects on you day to day is rather different. I know Danish is spoken in Denmark, but I didn't know how alienated I would feel when on numerous social occasions everyone around me continued to speak Danish. I knew it would be darker, but I couldn't have foreseen the effects prolonged darkness has on me. 😞 I completely agree that saying 'antisocial' is harsh. I believe I was going for 'asocial', but I've since learned that those two aren't the same. I suppose the majority of people I did meet are fairly introverted. Nevertheless, I'm grateful for the plethora of wonderful friends I made there. The fact we've remained friends during this pandemic and all its challenges is a testament to the strength Danish friendships can have once they are forged. I trust your friendships with Danish people will be similarly productive. Nevertheless, I did pass Prøve i dansk 3 with flying colours. I could understand everything and speak (with mistakes). Unfortunately being able to sort of express myself and make patchwork of what I was trying to convey was no longer what I wanted to do. I wanted to be in an environment where I could express myself freely and eloquently without worrying about mispronouncing or whether it was 'en' or 'et' for a word. Sure, I could have tried for longer, but seeing as you also decided to stop learning Danish, I'm sure you'll understand the difficulty that this can pose on anyone. A point that I have not added in that specific video (though it is in other ones), is that I was doing a PhD in Denmark (no, I didn't get SU). PhDs are widely known to be extremely stressful and difficult. This, coupled with lots of unrelated academic pressures, did not make my integration or the winter any easier. Once I was finished with the PhD, I needed to regroup and think about what was best for me. I moved to London not for the weather specifically, rather for the ease of integration (language), the abundance of opportunity in my field (computer science and finance), and the proximity to other European countries where many of my friends live. That being said, London weather IS better than the weather in Copenhagen and Odense. There's far less rain, it's much less overcast, and as a result there are more sun hours. I definitely agree that England has different average numbers. However it seems that London itself has a microclimate that's more favourable. It's not Spain by any means, but it's definitely an improvement. I hope to continue watching your videos and be a part of your journey. Who knows, maybe we can meet up later this year when I head to Denmark for a visit? 😊
I appreciate your ability to take critique. But I would have appreciated if you did some more research before dissing our climate too 🙂 No hard feelings, I just get the impression that it wasn't DK you wanted to go to in the first place.
Its like you are forgetting the people you wanted to talk to, have the exact same problems with language like you do/did. English is not the native tounge in Denmark, so people work hard to communicate and do their best. They also want to relax with friends, not "working" for every sentence, so in social situations, you cant expect all the danes changing language for 1 person in the room. And all danes love when people try to learn danish, we are a small country so its a sign of love and respect, that you work on it. I worked for a company, in Denmark, where the language was english att meetings etc. But they also paid new workers to take danish lessons. 1 guy did it for 5 years, still not talking danish... 1 girl, 2 months and then she asked people to talk danish to her, its the most impressive thing ive ever seen. I think that its very different how people learn and how fast. But the most important thing is being happy, and im glad that you are happy where you live now :-)
Hi @HouseofEl used to live in London now live in Copenhagen, and I got your point about the weather, totally. London is not an easy place to live and there are so many downsides..and at the same time it' the most incredible, amazing City. It can be hard to make friends there as well, but being a native English speaker you'll have zero probs. Strategically speaking, your choice seems very sound. For some it gets tough with kids and family, but until that point, you can live a comfortable and privileged life there - obv with pros and cons, exactly like here in Copenhagen.
Well you never know when you move to another country how you're gonna settle in. And i suppose the long dark winters is an experience. We do have something called winter depressions. A lot of people vacation in southern Europe during winters just to get some sunshine and get warmed up. She didn't find happiness in Denmark so she did the right thing and moved on to somewhere else. Good for her, i hope she settles in better where ever it may be.
I lived and wirked 2 diffrent places in the usa, los angeles and chicago, found my life better in chicago, I loved but going back home was diffucult, my friends was likexwhat are ypu doing here
I don't think you guys give yourself enough credit for how much you adapted to "us" and wanted it, I think it goes for the most part of European countries if you want to make friends, you need to adapt, that doesn't mean you have to loose who you are. Even with friends or work, you adapt to the group you are hanging out with, but you are still you. I think you are pretty much spot on with the analysing of the video, language, friends and the weather, I had a chuckle about moving to London instead, their shortest day is 42 minutes longer than ours, so maybe she has a point.
Danes can be hard to get to know, but usually the "error" is to try to connect in places, where we don't get involved with other people. Stopping us at the street for anything other than asking for directions won't work well. In general we aren't very interested in shallow relationships, and this can probably be seen as being closed off, if you don't expect to put a lot of work into getting a connection with others. The winter is dark, which is why sunshine comes as pills 😉
She moved to Denmark so of course things are in Danish, but people start with English early in school, so people change language when you speak to them in English. She came unprepared and with unrealistic expectations to begin with. There are things that you do in the wintertime and there are other things in the summertime. If it doesn't rain, then you don't appreciate the sun as much. You appreciate that there are different things to do depending on the seasons. In Denmark you can go to the cinema and watch a movie and watch a movie in the original language only with Danish subtitles except movies for children. In Germany they also change the spoken language to German. It means it is harder if you are not good at the language. You don't make friends on the street in Denmark. A person you only meet once is more like a “bekendtskab” not a “ven”. Get a hobby then you have something in common to talk about and then you can make many friends. One of the fun things about Danish is to go to another country and speak Danish to each and nobody else know what you are saying. It is like a secret language. Just don't use English words in the middle of a Danish sentence if nobody else should know what you are talking about. You can not do it in Norway and Sweden. If go to Japan and ask a random person on the street where something is then most of the time, they don’t speak English.
Stine You still might want to watch that "dane speaks to dane in a foreign country and no one understands them". in 1957 I was at a large boy scout camp in England. We were allowed to venture into London by train ourselves, and one day 5 of us 15-year old boys found ourselves in the compartment with a beautiful young girl, and we spent all the time from Guildford to Liverpool street commenting on her looks, and what we would like to do with/to her. When we got toLiverpool str. she said "Tak for turen", and left 5 embarresed scouts!
When I lived in London i found the winters worse than Denmark. Sure winter starts a bit later, but in Denmark at least when you get frost it clears the air and lowers the humidity. London is just cloudy and damp October to March.
1. When moving to a foreign country, please don't be surprised that it is - foreign. If you want to stay and to integrate, there is no way to get around learning the language. 2. Danes are not anti-social, on the contrary, they are very social, However, they are, true enough, social in closed circles. And it may be difficult to get inside. However, there are differences from region to region. In Funen where I live, it's quite normal to talk to strangers without being considered weird, and people can have conversations in the supermarket or in the street. But it is, of course, different in bigger cities. 3. The Danish winter is absolutely horrible and even most Danes would agree on that. This is why in winter they stampede to southern Europe or even further south. Or go skiing in places where it might be cold but where the sun shines.
Being Latin I agree. There is the reputation of warm countries that we laugh and drink and share food (which is accurate). However, it is weird in the 'good time' countries to ask stuff like "do you believe in God?" etc. I think some benefit from the shallow warmth and some benefit from the chillier loyal relationships (and I'm not hating on either)
Same here in Norway-we appreciate close frienships more than superficial ones. That does NOT mean, however, that we don`t like small talk (heard this about us Scandis)..at least I am an exception to that rule. Check out the videos of "american missionaries in norway".
Kudos to her for realising she needed to leave for her to be happy! Reading the comments on that video it seems the thing that really had Danes up in arms was the language thing. But I helped a couple of friends as well as my husband fill out forms and government documents and was ashamed and frustrated that there was no or only limited options in English. That being said, there's almost always the option to ask a Dane for help - government officials have been super patient and helpful with my husband! For comparison I went on exchange in the French part of Switzerland. We were issued a form in French that needed to be filled in and mailed (as in by post) to the municipality - that's kind of daunting first week in a foreign country. When I got home I signed up for the organisation that help the exchange students coming to Aarhus get settled. We had three days where local officials were on campus with their computers to help these kids get registered! All in all: obviously England will be easier to navigate if you only speak English, but I believe most other non-english nations would've posed a much bigger challenge than Denmark (or our Scandinavian cousins)
Good points, it’s always best to make yourself happy - even if some of the things could have been predicted or avoided with more effort, happiness is the most important. She also has other videos describing all of the great things about Denmark too.
Your reply is an example of never really understanding the reason for things being the way they are. Denmark is a mono-linguistic region. You might be able to find forms and such in Swedish or German since they're the closest linguistically different countries. Denmark also being so small and of relatively little importance means that it's a decentlæy rare occurrence to get tourists outside of Copenhagen and Aarhus. There's simply no need to do the effort. The region in Switzerland you mentioned is duo-linguistic and as such there are often official documents in a bridging language since it's possible that people are unable to communicate in written form in the language.
@@nielsjensen4185 Try going to the vest coast then... you'll more often be approached by someone speaking German than anything else. I lived in Ribe for 3 yrs and heard about 50/50 in terms of Danish and German, at least in terms of people approaching me on the street. So no.. you DEFINITELY need to make the effort.
@@Litvan I live in Esbjerg and even if they get TV signals from Germany it's still designated Danish region. You need to go further south to Tønder to be able to find forms that are in dual-language as the norm.
I learned language quite quickly and it was free. However I didn’t have to work as my husband was Danish.Surprised she didn’t learn Danish as I met lot of friends at language school. Her approach to making friends was weird. You usually make friends through work or sports/fitness clubs. Totally agree with the weather. Really don’t like October to April here unless sunny cold winter day which is rare. I have lived here 24 years and still really hate weather in Denmark. I am still here coz my kids are here and social welfare system is great so no money worries and good healthcare
Yeah, we talk about Danish class as a great way to make friends in a few videos - we are still close with a lot of our friends from classes in 2018 😊🇩🇰
It is very true, we Danes do socialize a lot in sports clubs. They provide an informal environment and it sheds people of their differences in social and economic statues. It's a bit weird, but socializing is often done in the locker room. It's a good place to earn new friendships, and it also shows reliability of people meeting up, which is a very highly valued trait in Danish culture.
She's moving to LONDON because of the winter weather?? Makes me wonder how honest she is being about her opinions. I'm an ex Londoner & an 🇬🇧Anglo-Dane🇩🇰. That takes the language out of my own experience (though not fluent, know enough to get by with pronounciation no problem). I haven't lived in Denmark as an adult so cannot comment on the social side. But London for better winter weather?!! Thank you for the interesting videos!
She does not like the dark cold rainy winter in Denmark and moves to London 🤣🤣🤣 It's the funniest thing I've heard in a long time 🤣🤣🤣 She has probably only lived there for 1 month while it was high summer when she made the video 🤣🤣🤣
Haha we have to admit, that was the funniest part of the video. She does have some points where I can see that she had a tough time, but it’s work to live abroad 😊
winter is terrible.... Did you look at a map? Copenhagen is situated at 55'40 North. The equivalent in the US is Newfoundland or south-most of Alaska. It is more north than Edmonton, Canada :)
@@RobeTrotting Was too when I realise looking at a globe how far south the US actually is. And o this wasn't my first time looking at either a map or globe. Just never really looked at the altitude. But I can admit that I was a grown man when i finally realised. Hehe.
The winter makes us all want to move away 😂😂 It’s absolutely fair she didn’t want to live in Denmark, just because you move and get a great job doesn’t mean you going to love living in this country. I totally understands why she moved to London. I used to live there and it took me about 3 years to finally feel at home and finding great friends. It takes a lot of efforts when you move and you should love to stay there otherwise it’s not worth anything.
@@RobeTrotting I thank you, you brings such good content and are real about it! I have an american friend living here in Vejle and we love to watch you content and discuss it and it has really opened my eyes to how different danes and americans are - even though we, danes, think we are the same. You helped him alot to ask some, for him, difficult questions. That to me was a given. Thank you guys for your content again, you make a difference!
@RobeTrotting Thank you, It was particularly interesting to see a 'react'-video from someone that aren't Danish to why someone else got to the point where they had to decide to leave. One thing I am a bit puzzled about is the very factual comment she made that ministerial sites are only in Danish and it can be hard to find out what you are expected to do and cannot do. The reason I am puzzled is that I almost always - when on pages from government, municipaity, various authories find a button that says "English" that will switch the entire page to English. Some pages where it is relevant (pages addressing refugees, asylum seekers, etc. also often have a link referring them to a Arabic, Farsi, Kurdish, Turkish, and others. I actually even believe it has become a legal requirement that all public and governmental sites are in at least Danish and English and where relevant in the major languages spoken by other immigrants. But I wonder why that is not the experience? You seemed to concur. Obviously I rarely switch to the English version, but I have tried and at first glance it appeared to me to be a full version in English too. But am I mistaken? Is it only a brief or summary of the main page, that contains much less information? Can you perhaps comment - if you find the time, of course! 🙂 The darkness in Winter I understand. I personally totally embrace the darkness and love it, and I love to move together in the couches around the candles and have some hot drinks and cheese ;-) so I have no problem with the dark months, but my wife really suffers and she have winter depression, so she has to travel for 3 weeks 2-3 times during the winter season. She goes to some warm Asian country - preferably Sri Lanka - and spend some time in the sunlight out there, as this is her only chance of recharging her batteries. I go with her as often as I can, but she needs it more than I do - I just go for the pleasure of the journey. But this is just to say, that I understand how much it can affect people who are sensitive to darkness, as the woman who made the video clearly is. There are ways to mitigate that to some extent, but as I understood she had already tried some of the remedies she felt comfortable with. My wife has a UV-lamp in her study that is on for a couple of hours each day to boost her serotonin level. Thanks again for your interesting take on this. And so happy to see you guys living and apparently enjoying life in Denmark. That is wonderful.
The thing about learning Danish in class is that you can learn a lot about the language (grammar etc.) but real learning happens through using it in stead.
Loved loooved this video. Thanks guys for being truthful to yourselves in your opinions and for the openness to such a different culture to the point of embracing it as gracefully as ya’ll do! Very funny the London weather thing. I’d add the very gray/rainy weather.
I respect her views and good she found a place better for her then. She might have too many expectations, and I can agree that she should have done better research, but also some things you only know by experience. I love your views and analysis of the video and comparing it to your own experience and expectations. Good idea for a video.
Thanks so much Sara. This was fun to compare some other views and from an experience we didn’t have. She was very honest and respectful and I can see how London is an easier place to live as a foreigner. PLUS they have a Philadelphia themed pub that we love 😂
Having come from the UK, I can see why she would choose the UK over Denmark and you have covered that well. Yes, the winters are dark, sooo dark, but the flip side is the summers are so light. I love that as soon as it lightens up, people emerge, it suddenly becomes so vibrant. I love the colours here, it just fills me with joy. Oh, the other thing she'll notice in London is the crime, it is so much more safe and peaceful in Denmark.
Derek mentions Melodi Grand Prix, and my ears immediately perks up. 😄I'm looking forward to it SO much, I'm watching the Norwegian selection (and will be following the Swedish, and have listen to the songs released in Finland). Ah! I can't get enough of this competition. Fun, joy, and lots of music. What's not to like?
I gather you never have worked in the Melodi Gran Prix, if you had (and I have when it was held here in Copenhagen last time) the LAST thing you wanna do is seing it "live" on TV
@@sidewind131258 Yaeh, we got that. But you really feel like this is the place to deliver your honesty? People sharing how much they love the competition, and this is the time and place you decide to crap on it. For what reason other than to mention (repeatedly) that you worked on the show? I don't care how much you hated working on the show. I didn't ask to hear that.
But...are "The 3 things they don't tell you" that: a) Moving to Denmark, it's good to learn to speak Danish b) Danes are a bit reserved c) Denmark is to the north, so Winters are dark, and summers are light. @robe Trotting, aren't those 3 things pretty much at the top of the list of the things people mention about Danes and Denmark? How did "they" not tell her that? ;-)
I kind of assumed it was normal to do just a little research into where ever you decide to go. A quick google search would have told her all the stereotypes about Denmark and the Danes - and there's a lot of truth to it. Especially in regards to how Danes act in public space, or how social we are in certain situations. We are helpful, but don't expect small talk with strangers. She also, for some weird reason, seems to really be negatively affected by the fact that other countries have their own languages. I, as a Dane, would not expect any information in Danish if I was to move to New York City, London, Paris, Berlin, Tokyo, or Nairobi. It doesn't work that way - even for an international language like English. A lot of things are translated into English in your everyday life in Denmark. However, there's also free Danish language classes, and a lot of people to help you through the day - and there's always your own embassy to contact. Her point about the language seems weird and misplaced.
I am Portuguese and have absolutely no problems talking to people in random places, be it the supermarket or at a busstop, it of course depends on the situation and whether something "natural" to discuss pops up. In Portugal it´s very easy to get shallow friendships (back in the 90s, might have changed), people you might meet for various activities but otherwise aren´t strongly connected with, in Denmark friends are usually for life, at least the ones I have. I don´t find the Danes to be anti-social at all, they are just different. Casual friendships in Denmark are usually work/activity related.
Live and let live. It's not about whether she was prepared for moving abroad. She lived for more than 4 years in Denmark and had to realise that it wasnt for her. I guess anybody would feel disencouraged when they realise that some aspects of a life abroad can't be reconsiled. I understand why she is moving to the UK from a language perspektive. London is far more cosmopolitan than Copenhagen, so i guess she will have a better time socially as well. Since she chooses to stay in nothern Europe, the weather can''t be as big a problem as she makes it out to be. I hope she finds whatever she is looking for.
Your conclusion is spot on. Listening with a critical ear, it could sound as if map reading skills, and the concept of countries vs. states has been a bit of a revelation... after all, Denmark is at around the 55th parallel, comparable to parts of Canada and Alaska. Also not known for their tropical climate. In comparison to their coastal climate, Denmark clearly has the benefit of the Gulf stream, making it a lot milder, than the North American counterparts. Which to some degree explains grey dark winters as opposed to crisp white arctic ones.
She's absolutely right about the culture not being very open. We don't talk to strangers unless we have a reason to, and anyone just chatting up strangers on the street will come off as weird... I personally enjoy this aspect of our culture but i can see how an extroverted foreigner would struggle. I think they are slightly more open to that sorta thing in the more rural areas though
People have told us that the more rural areas have more openness to chatting and taking to random people. We struggled with this a little bit but now it’s the opposite. When we return to the states we’re like “why are you talking to me? I don’t know you.” 😂
There's definitely a difference between the rural areas and the cities (especially Copenhagen). Even just small things such as people casually saying "Hej/godaften" (or "Mojn" haha) when they pass each other when they're out in public, doesn't matter if they're strangers everything is just kind of more relaxed and slow paced in a way. But even in cities there's also some sub cultures that are more open than the norm.
When the days are short in the winter, that are proportionally longer in the summer, so you get to have sunshine from 04:00 to 23:00 :) Totally worth the cost of the winter :)
I remember seeing that video about the same time I found your channel and it was soooo refreshing/encouraging to see your channel for that reason. It is complicated being an immigrant/expat of course - more complicated than being a "guest" in another place BUT it's ridiculous to expect the wide open arms of comfort when you're not in your birth country. Because I'm here for the infrastructure, healthcare, and research, hell yes I am going to put a little Danish flag out for birthdays and study Danish every day. It's weird to say but it saved my life. Also... maybe it's a gay subcommunity thing but I haven't had trouble making friends here
Winter sucks, but the summer months compensate with spring that at times feels almost magical and days in late June where the sun hardly sets. And mentioned in the video, one can take a trip away to see the sun if really needed. Also London - please. London is not exactly the place to go to see the sun more and it also rains there quite a bit, in fact in 2020 it rained 170.5 days in London and in Copenhagen the average is 170 days. The average hours of Sunshine in Copenhagen is 1.780 a year and for London the number is 1.400, only the hours are distributed differently and the average hours of sun is like 50 for Copenhagen in January and it is 54 in London.
Moving to a foreign country is not easy. Her title is weird to me, i feel it's common to be told these are challenges when moving here. Hope she's found somewhere that suits her better!
That’s true, we didn’t think of that, but everyone knows that Danish is spoken in Denmark and everyone tells you that the winters are tough and Danes can take longer to befriend new people until they warm up. These things were all explained to us very quickly.
I have an english friend who speaks danish fluendly. She says, that the reason english speakers doesn’t learn to speak danish is because its to easy to give up since many in Denmark speaks english. Actually she says english people are too lazy to learn, her words not mine. Living in Amsterdam for 4 years I know, how hard it can be to learn a different language. You are in a conversation, thinking you are doing great and suddenly the people your are with change the subject or talk about some memory that they have in common. Or a joke. But you just have to stay strong. When I first went to Amsterdam I got a job in a dutch bookstore without speaking much dutch. I had to learn quickly. My sister did the same, when she went to Germany to live. She got a job in a german speaking company. Now she often hears from germans, that she speaks like a native german. I also have a spanish friend here in Denmark, it was hard for her to find a job in Spain, so she went to Denmark and got a job in an Elder People’s home and she went from not knowing a word in danish to be quite good in 3 months! When I was living in Amsterdam sometimes people also spoke english to me, but I keept insisting on speaking dutch. Yes I got tired too. But you just have to stay strong, start listning only to danish like music and talk and so on and it doesn’t matter if you don’t understand all or nothing. And stop listning to english or talk english at least for a period like 14 days😊. Demand people listen to you, demand people keep speaking danish to you. It takes a lot of patience in the beginning, but suddenly it goes fast. And it is also an good idea to get a job in a danish speaking Company for the long run. 😅I guess is going to be hard for you, since you both are english speakers, its like two smokers trying to quit smoking togther, but everything is possible. And right now I’m quite irritated that I didn’t wrote all this in danish.
To be fair, even if you know these things from a logical point, it is a lot more difficult living them. Especially the darkness thing. I mean, even as a dane I get moody and passive i the winter. The sky was clear today, so I prioritised going for walk in my lunch break instead of eating because I know I need it. I know a lot of people romanticise the winter and even say the prefer it. But Vitamin D deficiency and winter depressions are real things, that even native scandinavians struggle with. I can't imagine how hard it must be to handle if you are not brought up in this environment. Visiting is fine, first winter is fine, but the fourth one must be really hard.
When My husband and I married (1984) we moved to Vienna, he is Viennese. (Vienna is the capitol of Austria). He was enrolled in a music course and wanted to have his degree. Perfect understandable. So we moved there. In school here in Denmark I have learned German since 6th grade , so I knew some German, but I didn't know dialect/the other type of German they speak in Austria. Like I went shopping, and paying I reallized I needed a bag for getting my groceries home, so I asked: "Darf iche eine Tüte haben?" Her mouth formed a very pointed,very small O. And she answered: "Nein sie dürfen eine SACK haben". So that very first shopping spree on my own I learned the difference in shopping bags in German and Austrian. And I still laugh about it. With time my friends started laughing at me because they expected me to speak more German than Austrian and now living in Denmark and we meet Germans they believe I'm Austrian. So funny.
It kinda sounded like she expected, that moving to Denmark would be like moving to another state. I do get her points, but just felt like she hadn't done any research before moving, or were willing to change her ways of doing things.
Yes our winters are long and dark, but you can't beat our summer. Long days filled with sun and light. Sitting outside at 22.00, and its still light out. Can't beat that.
What!!! anti-social!! that hurt, a lot! We are a careful people, well most Scandis are, More like the winter months..we prefer the hygge - pulled in, covered up and watchful, but when summer comes....friendships bloom! and the beer flows! I moved to Portugal for work 38yrs ago, didn't speak Portugese & they didn't speak much English; in those days You learn, adapt, adjust and mesh into the culture, little by little Now it's like a second home even though I've been back in DK, for a long while And swapping DK for England, that's just hilarious..weather was never the problem..it was the language! great to see you guys! hello from windy, freezing Hundested 🌸❄🥶
Yeah agreed here, antisocial is far from the case. And you’re spot on about the nice part of the winter months. Had no idea you were in Portugal - what a great experience. Derek’s mom was thinking of splitting time there at some point. Windy and cold here too, but perfect for some cozy nights inside 😊🇩🇰🥶
@@RobeTrotting Portugal is an amazing country, full of the lovliest people...food, weather & culture are to die for! It's a country of opposites from snow to beach, rich to poor, strong cultural roots to extreme international flavor!! 💚🤎❤ Well worth a long stay!
I'm Italian and I can tell you that making friends here is difficult too: we normally connect to strangers quite easily... but is that a friend? It taķes time to become friends here too and our best friends are the ones we met in our youth, too. Let's not confuse shallow contacts and friendship, two completely different kinds of human connection.
Loved the video. I don’t think her attitude were as bad as some has commented. She did at least give it 4 years and if you still don’t feel happy and at home in a country, then you owe it to yourself to make a change. I did burst out laughing though when she said: so I’ve now moved to London! I’ve just returned to Denmark after living in London for 10 years. London has the exact same weather as in Denmark and the winter is just as long. The only difference is that public transportation shuts down every time there’s the tiniest amount of snow lol. If it wasn’t so frustrating when trying to get to work, it would be funny. We are literally talking about half a centimetre of snow delaying trains and busses for hours 😂. Moreover, people are only VERY slightly chattier than Danes. They don’t just start chatting to strangers on the tube, so I hope she doesn’t get too disappointed. They are more polite and considerate in the public space though, so maybe that will help making her feel more welcome over there 👍🏻
My wife moved to Århus for 2 months for study/work reasons, she doesn't talk danish or swedish (knowing swedish would not have helped much). What was really awkward rude behaviour from her Danish hosts and in the workplace was that no one didn't talk english to her, they talked danish and that's all. She felt really confused and not welcomed. She slowly started to understand danish but overall experience from that time wasn't nice at all.
That’s very strange, I’ve only ever heard the opposite - that we speak too much English to foreigners and this not giving them a chance to practice and learn English.
Denmark is such a small country, that even if friends move away (unless they leave the country), they are 4 hours away at the most...so holding onto childhood friends is easier
@@RobeTrotting It blody well depends on who your childhood's friends have become 😨 Mine went drunks, druggies, prostitutes and one or two is doing time for, let's call it, make sure the victim didn't survive. Other than that, as Freddy Mercury and Queen sang, Friends will be firends
That is how it is living in a city, unless you know people, or approach them. I'm a Swede, living in Sweden - obviously it is easier without the language barrier. I slowly approached the girls working at my local café. I don't know how, but now I have deep conversations with some of them - or at least talking about current events. To me it seems like she really has preconceived notions from a select couple of people.
I really enjoyed the video, but what i loved is that both of you said "hej hej" instead of goodbye, it's a small detail but it makes me feel like you really are enjoying your time here in denmark and are maybe without thinking picking up on the customs and language. kind regards!
Aw, that's so sweet to hear Ida, we do feel really self conscious about our Danish, but that's a simple way to insert a bit of it in the video as well as some other "Easter eggs" that don't stand out unless you're Danish and get the joke right away.
Girl was mad. You guys had given multiple examples on how to socialize little by little. I think maybe another reason she couldn't encounter anyone was due to her energy, she is now in London and still upset, I hope this woman finds her happy place one day!
Good work guys, I have been living in Danish for circa 20 years, it is not perfect of course but personally I love it, and I am tired of people judging this nice country harder than it deserves and by the way, Danish grammar is much easier than the grammar of other languages, think if she was in Germany or French, grammar is harder and fewer people speaks good English ;)
Most danes take d-vitamin, which is classed as an 'anti-dression' med during winter. which is makes a lot of people think we are only happy because we are 'drugged'. I think this misunderstanding is sad. Curling up under a blanket with someone you love, have candles going and enjoy the stars with a cup of tea - was better then that?
the funny thing is, that you only need to be out in the sun about 10 minutes 2-3 times a week (getting sun on arms, legs and face) to get enough vit. D And it is "saved up" in the body fat, so you have vit. D in the winter period. But eating some salmon or taking a low D. vit. Will have you covered in the dark winter. I also think that when you are born and raised in a 4 season country, you dont think about it that much :-) I love the "dark" season, with blankets, pillows, candles, movies etc.. its like the world is more quiet :-)
I'm a Dane and have lived in Denmark all my life. I definitely feel the darkness of winter emotionally, but I agree with your statement. You make more of an effort, thus creating hygge and surviving another winter and enjoy the summer sun! Also I think you should be unrealistically unlucky, to go a few months, without a ray of sun! We have really cold and sunny days in winter aswell.
i'm pretty sure there's a deeper reason why she moved out of denmark. there's also a possibility that denmark wasn't what she imagined it to be, and it's the disappointment that really made her move out.
That's a good point, Denmark has a lot of buzz from news stories and social media posts about things like the green kayak program in Copenhagen and such - but that's not daily life.
Always looking forward to watching your videos. As good as you guys are you deserve alot more followers. She had alot of good points for leaving but was stunned when she said London. I'm Cuban living in Vegas, I have lived in many places , Spain, Venezuela, Puerto rico, new York and Seattle for 27 years. I can understand how she felt isolated living in Denmark, yes a safe country , amazing social system but having lived in seattle it was the same feeling. Very educated people, polite but it was very superficial and the weather didn't help . I have traveled to eastern Europe and the people are definitely not going to chat a stranger , in a new York subway you could be dead and someone will talk to you. One of my favorite countries is Switzerland, I have been there a few times. It's a great country if you live there but the people are super strict, very introverted. As one resident of Switzerland said we are very private but once we know you after 25 years we will be your best friend.
My cousin and his family with two small children moved to Copenhagen from the US for a few years and absolutely loved it. Except for the prices of everything and few sunny days, everything cost so much more than in the US - but there are museums and playgrounds and lots of free things to do. There are no clothes dryers and other things that waste electricity are not used. Their children were in a lovely pre-school and learned Danish easily. Even young kids spoke both English and Danish and some even three languages. They really enjoyed living there but they had no car and no elevator and they were on the 5th floor. But they were healthy from walking and biking. Everyone seemed to know how to knit and taught my cousins wife to make beautiful items. It's true about restaurants- not a lot and not affordable. There are pubs and they will serve you one pickle and one sausage with no bread. (And PS They had few local friends but that didnt bother them as they were so busy with their own kids. They had a few close friends from school mom group and from his work so that was fine with them. And the strudels and pastries were wonderful.)
😀Thanks for keeping the conversation going here everyone! These are some really cool and important dialogues. And since a few people asked, here is link to Mike’s lille fredag shirt from our merch store 👕: bit.ly/33tekMp
I find it petty that most Danes are so defensive on the point of language , for her to get an international job, she is aware that she does not come to Denmark and find everything in English ( international language) but that it was a struggle for her and made it difficult to integrate , which is fair. That is her personal experience and perspective. We call ourselves tolerant and open until someone points out something we don’t like. The reactions are a little sad but not surprising.
@@naomipeele494 You’re right - she is honest and tells about her experiences, and one could/should learn from that 👍
I watch videos from the woman's channel who you have quoted herein too.
She IS interesting, isn't she?
Say, moving to France or Germany is no harder in terms of having to learn the native language than moving to Denmark, if only because so many Europeans are stunningly multi-lingual -- I mean, it's kind pseudo-disgusting, actually, haha.
Now, I was in both countries for a few months and could get by without knowing how to speak French (or German) fluently. Now, I know French fairly well and knew German not at all (back when I was there but have since learnt to speak some sentences in German) but, I still can assure you that knowing just English will not unduly handicap anyone.
Now, I would not recommend LIVING in anywhere foreign, without learning the native language of that place, but, staying anywhere in Europe for just a month or two, won't set you back to any crazy degree, I don't reckon anyway again because so many Euros can speak English to some degree, which frankly makes we Yanks look rather provincial because many Americans do not speak a foreign language, with any degree of proficiency, at all.
I’m just curious, how good is your Danish and if do you ask people to speak it to when when they talk in English?
I would love to move to the usa
Would it be possible for you guys to make a video about moving/living in usa
I love that! "Denmark's weather sucks! I'm off to......London!" Looking forward to seeing her future video on "Why I left London)"
That was hilarious, but I’m sure she knew it would be similar haha - still it’s pretty ironic.
Next she is off to sunny Edinburgh.
Its the outlook you come with. You guys are much more open to other cultures. She needs to lighten up and look at the cup halv full and not half empthy. And London - thats funny. 😂
Hahaha, indeed :D Rainy 10 celsius degree in London feels like - 5.
I have not lived permanently in Denmark since 1991. I have lived and worked all over the world since then and are currently living and working in Singapore. That was just how my life panned out due to work. I never considered weather at all no matter where I lived and worked.
Of course, if you have dreams of chatting up people in the street, you may get into serious trouble in many countries. When you befriend a Dane, you will usually have a friend for life. Friendship is a pretty serious thing for most Danes.
She is correct when she describes it is easier to befriend people in southern Europe. However, you are also much more likely to end up being conned in southern Europe (of course, this is not a rule but it happens much more often there compared to northern Europe).
When I was an apprentice, I had to be at work 7 o'clock in the morning and workday ended 4 o'clock in the afternoon. During winter, I never really experienced daylight during weekdays. I never really considered that a problem. I guess it depends on your mental strength.
I am aware that many people probably get depressed easier than I do (which is vertically never).
Honestly, I agree with a lot of her points, and understand why it would be difficult to navigate in a foreign society while also handling these frustrations. What I don't like is her attitude. It seems to me that she sees these things as flaws in Danish society, rather than simply the facts of living in a foreign country. She seems to be of the opinion that Danes and Denmark should change and cater to her, rather than the other way around
True, she makes a lot of good points but doesn’t accept that she didn’t prepare for living abroad if those considerations weren’t taken.
@@RobeTrotting definitely, she should've done some research. I feel like she expected something completely different and based her experience on that. It's a bit sad that her experience was like that because of her expectations..
Excactly, her attitude is horrible. And you are spot on, she seems like she expect the country and people to cater to her, she expect things to be like where she came from instead of enjoying the differences and actually trying.. she Seem a bit spoiled and narrowminded. And for a extremely pale person, it dosnt Seem like she have a Strong relationship with sun and hot weather. And truthfully, we have Better weather than London.
@@RobeTrotting but her biggest flaw in that regard, is that she comes off as blaming danes and Denmark for her failed preparation.
Her attitude was awful
Getting friends in Scandinavia is a bit like joining a biker gang. You start off being a hang around, someone who's presence is tolerated. You won't be invited to parties, but you might join the group when they're out. Next phase, if you make it thru the first one, is the Prospect phase. That's when you get invited to some functions, but not all. In this phase they get to know you deeper, the conversation gets less shallow. Made it thru that? Then you're a full fledged member of the group and will have friends for life. People you can call, or who might call you, in the middle of the night, and will share their deepest thoughts and secrets with you.
This description is perfect 👍
To much effort for nothing 🤭😂👊
So so true everywhere in the world, even in über-friendly US.
I like this.
I can vouch for this. Totally true. And yes, it can take years depending on who you're trying to befriend (like a colleague).
"3 Things They Don't Tell You" are LITERALLY the first things we tell you....
1) Denmark is in Danish just as Germany is in German.
2) Danes are laid back, direct to the point of bluntness and socially self sufficient.
3) We hate the winter too. But the endless light in summer makes up for it.
I don't think they are blunt. They avoid confrontation and can't talk about resolving conflicts, in my experience. Makes it hard to work with them.
@@NaedynWhat are you on about? I agree that we tend to avoid confrontation because it can be uncomfortable, but we are definitely not shy about resolving conflicts when they arise.
@@Maltesfilm not in my workplace. Maybe it's a Nordjylland thing.
I also find it super annoying that when I travel to another country that there isn't a single sign in Danish, and they talk another language than Danish 🙄
Yeah, imagine that lol
@@KurtFrederiksen I went to Paris for a week on a high school trip back when I was a teenager. My friends and I were in a store and were talking about the couple in front if us in Danish … then heard them talking Danish to each other 😅 Luckily we weren’t saying anything horrible but we definitely embarrassed ourselves haha 😂
@@KurtFrederiksen ohh I have I childhood memory from kreta (Greece). My mum wanted to buy me my first watch and the lady in the store was kinda of a jerk. And my mom was shit talking her in Danish. When we left the store she said in perfect Danish "ha en forsat go dag" she was a Danish exchange student.q
On same holiday I was sitting in the edge on the waves on the beach. And a mom and daughter came up. They was taking pictures, (I'm really dark for a dane). The mom said in Danish get a bit to the rigth so we can get the local kid in the picture, I just completely ignored it. They took the picture, and I just looked at them and asked where they where from in Denmark, the mom completely freak out.😂😂😂😂😂
🤣🤣🤣 🇳🇴
Det er bare fordi vi er såååå unikke❤.
My problem with the video is really the framing.
The problem wasn’t “I wasn’t prepared for how difficult living in a country with a different language is” it’s “It’s all in Danish”. But that isn’t even a problem, a country using it’s own language is not a “problem”.
Same thing with the making friends bit, again it wasn’t “they have a very different way of socializing, and I found it hard to adjust ” it’s “unlike me, they are antisocial” which is just kinda offensive on the face of it. Especially coming from someone who apparently failed at making any friends in 4,5 years of living here.
I think her issues are pretty valid, I get where she’s coming from, but the approach is just so off putting, and it makes sympathizing a lot harder.
Just get your ass up and learn the language.
Yes she appears totally naive and clueless, even though the points she makes are valid as being difficult for her . At the end she inserts that she finally accepted the fact that she cannot adapt to living with a different language , in a nordic country . Ok - she made the right decision for her. It’s that she presents it in this aggrieved way that makes her seem weird.
I was very surprised when I visited New York from Sweden that no one spoke Swedish anywhere! Everything was in English only, quite outrageous how they didn't have everything in Swedish as well... 🤔😂
😂 Right! So wild haha. Actually, kinda funny thing, Derek grew up in New Sweden (southeastern Pennsylvania) and didn't realize it until years later. All the city names and street names with Swedish roots - it's pretty cool to drive around the area when we're back in the States and connect names to Sweden.
@@RobeTrotting Maybe he's even part Swedish then? 😅 I've heard that the Swedes brought their own culture to the US and Swedish was actually spoken for many maaaany years as the first language in those communities. It makes sense that they gave Swedish names to places 😁
😂❤
I believe there is IKEA somewhere...
@@MaN2Mega A lot of Swedish immigrants actually moved to Minnesota. The reason their National Football League team is called the Minnesota Vikings is in reference to the Scandinavian heritage of the region.
I would like to stress the point that if you are an English speaker and you are going to move to a foreign country, then Denmark is one of the easiest places to move to because virtually everyone speaks English.
I can see her point about getting to know new people. But then again in Scandinavia we might seem more reserved than in other countries, but it is highly possible to get friendships as a foreigner if you put the mind into it, and try to adapt to the new culture and social norms. And really just show interest in us and the danish society.
It's totally fair she figured out that her values and lifestyle didn't aline with the 'harsh' realities of living in Denmark. But to be honest, she just seems extremely unprepared about moving to another country, with an entirely different language, and different culture than what she was accustomed to. She didn't really have realistic expectations to begin with.
Her reasoning about why she moved to London was due to shitty weather and the cold climate in Denmark is just beyond any logic to me. Britain is at almost the same latitude as Denmark. Guess which country is notoriously known for having 'bad' weather? 😅
I am Swedish and agree 100%. We are quite reserved towards strangers and people from different cultures may not fully understand it.
Social life as an immigrant is limited everywhere. We immigrants have to stick together. There is no way around that!
(Unless you've married to the country and just use the social network of your spouse. But that has its own disadvantages.)
And absolutely no-one denies that the Nordic countries belong to the worst in this respect.
@@jmolofsson Not really, the problem is not making friends it's how you make friends, in Denmark atleast. Join a club, get a hobby and join a group, do a sport - that's how we make friends after the educational system, bonding over a common interest.
It's not about being better or worse, it's a different culture.
Britain has bad weather.
As a Londoner, even speaking English will not mean you make friends easily in London, as people tend to be reserved and wary, given the large city of 8m souls.
If this lady is going to London and thinks she can stop random people…good luck! Even northerners (from northern England) complain how stand offish Londoners can be.
Så sandt sandt du har ret i det hele. Hvorfor flytte til et land du ikke har studeret før du flytter der til det er jo latterligt og vildt uforberedt. Man kan heller ikke forvente at alle lande er som ens eget og gør præcis det samme som ens eget så man sku da naiv. Studer klatten først!😊
Imagine moving to a foreign country and not wanting to learn their language. You can eat their food, but is it really there where it stops? - Come on now.
If you are only here because of work, then sure, but no one asked you to come live here. Denmark is not where you retire, you work and on top of that you have all these expections of people. Alot of my friends and myself speaks 3-7 languages, not only because we need to or have to, but because we want to, so it's easier to communicate. Alot of people in europe learns multiple languages and they may never even get to visit those countries or ever speak the language.
The danes are hard workers, just like yourself. They have an 8 to 4 job, gotta pick up their kids after and cook dinner, then enjoy the few hours they have left of their day with the family before a new day starts. If you wanna befriend a dane, you gotta figure out what hobbies you have in common, but deeper friendships takes time, not only just here.
Besides from the rest of the world needs to learn english, what more do you want from us? Jeez
Have a good one in England
7 languages?! You're either lying or you and your friends are extremely good at languages (but looking at your grammar I think not). Even 3 is a lot if you actually speak them well. Knowing a couple of phrases does not qualify as speaking a language..
@@nielsliljedahlchristensen4924 oh wow mr. Perfect Grammar.
I speak, to varying degree, 4 languages and understand a couple more. Am I PERFECT in those languages? No, geez. But I can make conversation and be fairly sure I'm understood.
I guess that's not perfect enough though?
@@TrekkieGrrrl I never claimed to have perfect grammar, did I? Why are you offended by a comment that was for someone else?
@WoodPileDenmark I don't see what this has to do with my comment?
I don t get why you guys get so offended by a video of a woman who simply said what was true for her. Can t you just accept that Denmark is not destination number one for many people? She didn t offend anyone 😅
I lived in Denmark for around 4.5 years and I think the experience is very dependent on how you are integrated. Being in a couple, with the support associated, is probably a much better way to land in Denmark than solo. I was lucky because I was a student at UCPH and circled by people who were used to foreigners. It is also very dependent on the willingness to integrate and adopt the culture and society. Honestly, there were times that I was very lonely but, after meeting my husband and starting a family, my experience changed so much. I loved learning the language and am still homesick for Denmark, even 14 years after returning to Canada (we moved here for my husband's academic career). I was blessed with great friends and a lovely experience, although other people that I knew were not able to connect socially. PS: I still watch DR2 and listen to DR4 and DR8... and I am still in contact with my Danish friends.
I have to be honest, the 'frustration' over moving to a foreign country , and then having to learn a foreign language spoken in that country in order to get by completely baffles me. Yes, it can be hard, but it's an inevitable by-product of your decision to go to said country; it's as if I were frustrated over water being wet.
Being from Europe, you're also mostly just used to quickly hopping over from one neighbour to the next and encountering a totally different language, so I guess I can comprehend why this is a hard pill to swallow for Americans especially, when they are mostly surrounded by the comfort of only having to speak English throughout their lives. Anyways, I do not understand this kind of mentality and sense of entitlement, and if anything I'm glad for it.
One more thing; no, it is not 'frustrating' to learn a new tongue, when I moved to the UK and had to learn English for the first time, I was not frustrated: I was desperate to pick it up as quickly as possible, so I won't have to live as a secondary citizen - relying on others. If somebody is not ready to take on this kind of commitment, put their own egos aside, and deal with the discomfort of not being recognised via their native language; then it's better staying put where you are.
Moving to a new country can be very humbling, but rewarding at the same time.
Also, Denmark and the Danes are great!🇩🇰
This woman isn't even American! If I remember correctly, she's Croatian.
I totally agree. The discomfort of being out of your element is okay and welcomed, it's when we expect to be comfortable that we are unhappy as migrants. Language learning is a tool and .... an inevitability if you want to feel at home! I agree, Denmark is awesome.
I actually get a bit angry that she puts such a big point in the Danish language being everywhere. I mean … seriously? Being from a country with such a small language we Danes need to actually learn other language to be able to go anywhere else. What’s the problem?
@@PepsiMaGs I agree, this woman makes me very angry. Who does she think she is that everyone should conform to her? She's extremely stupid and was unprepared and went to Denmark with her big ego, thinking everything has to be her way. Nothing she says makes sense to me -- she's just enormously arrogant. Denmark is amazing and so are the Danes. Good ridence of bad rubbish like the English would say. Hope she doesn't get wet in London!!
@@PepsiMaGs I totally agree! She comes across as very spoiled/entitled.
I think she ended up in a perfect storm of feeling alone and not speaking the language, and thus not having anything to do with her friends in the winter months. But it's probably harder for her, because she was alone. You have a great advantage of having each other :)
We don't know how much she tried to approach people though.
I'm an introvert and have a hard time making friends in general, but at work you can try approaching someone maybe?
You’re right for sure, we are super lucky to have each other. We met a lot of friends individually though from separate Danish classes and sports teams that also make me feel like it’s very possible to crack through to friendships without being fluent in Danish. Still, it’s been a lot easier having each other for support (or when we’re bored haha).
@@myra0224 That's a thing I've heard from other foreigners here om RUclips. We don't really socialize that much with our colleagues outside of work here in DK (apparently not like they do in the US). It's like she said: We have friends that we have known since like kindergarten, and it's hard to break into a group like that without being too pushy (especially for us introverts) . Making new friends is so hard as an adult.
@@majaaxholt1927 I understand that, it's the same here in Belgium, but she just had such a bad attitude, basically blaming Denmark and the Danes for not being up her ass... Idk, that just doesn't sit right with me...
@@myra0224 I am definitely not disagreeing with you on that one :p
You guys, I wonder if you even realize how positive and curious you are in general?! It's so inspiring to see how you take responsibility for succeeding in living abroad without sugarcoating the difficulties of it. I mean seriously, this is the best thing about your channel. It's also the reason you're not two steps away from running away from us Danes. Kudos!!!
Wow, Kia that is such a huge compliment. Thank you SO much for the kind words. We do try to strike that balance that you describe, so it means a lot that it comes through 😊🇩🇰
@@RobeTrotting a smile always help - and she looks like someone who took a bite of a lemon ;-) waching your videos alweys make me smile because you smile a lot
Feels pretty entitled to move to a country where you know they have their own language and list that as a negative. Then on top of that it's a country where most people speak English! Can't imagine her reaction to moving to China, Japan, etc. As you both said, not sure what she expected.
I wonder if she ever extrapolated how she felt with her frustration to what it must be like for someone not born in a privileged position in society. She got a job in Denmark then moved there. Imagine what it must be like for someone making minimum wage (or less in some cases) who is a refugee, with a family, trying to just scrape by without knowing the language?
Learning a language is hard, so I completely get why that would frustrate her but the entire video comes off very privileged to me.
I see that point for sure. We often say that when we discuss things that are tricky about Denmark, that we had SO much better of a situation than some foreigners living here and we have a homeland we can return too. It puts things in perspective for sure.
She should just try and move to Germany or France, not to mention Italy or Spain. If she thought she had a hard time here, she'd be completely lost everywhere else.
LOL had the same POV. I went to Italy. Big country. Own language. Nothing was in English back then - guessing it has not changed much, though. However, I had to put in the hours to learn the language, because they did NOT speak English. I had a blast😊 making mistakes every single day, but the Italians loved that I put in the effort, and so do we in Denmark. You don't have to be fluent but get big credit for trying 👍😊
She actually explains in the original video why is frustrating (in here was cut) so I advice you to check it before making this coment. Also if don't live or ever try to ear danish I advice you to do so.
And let's put this fun fact: danish children at 3 have the least vocabulary of all the languages because of how hard is to speak danish. So yeah it's frustrating to learn danish.
For any foreigners wanting to make friends in Denmark, hobbies is a big part of how Danes makes friends. "Foreningslivet" is acctive and you need to find something that you can connect with people over, be it sports, the arts or flying model planes.
Very good advice! Connecting with people over a shared interest is the key 🇩🇰😊
I am italian and yes, we are very welcoming and warm and it is fairly easy to connect with us generally speaking, but to integrate in our society you must be able to speak italian. 😅😅😅
I think we should appreciate the fact that most Danes can speak fluent english, thing that does not happen with Italians 🤷🏼♀️😂
Loved the video guys ❤️
Are there any parts of Italy or specific Italian cities where it would be easier to integrate than others?
@@kbhprinsesse I would say if you speak italian you can integrate everywhere. I would consider more the quality of life tbh. Northern cities offers more job opportunities, better infrastructures and services but they might be hectic and really career oriented ( e.g Milan ), harder to make friends etc. Southern cities are more relaxed and people are more friendly, but you might struggle to live a decent life.
Not sure about your goals, but I wouldn't invest in living in Italy, sorry to say that because it's my country, but that's how I feel after years of living abroad.
@@beatrice91701 thank you for sharing your views on your country
As a Brazilian who lived in Italy for 8 years, I can confirm. ❤
Now I've been living in Germany for 5 years, do not speak German and even if the level of English here is higher than in Italy, if you don't speak the local language you'll not integrate.
@@kbhprinsesseMilan is akin to Denmark, as far as close-knit friends circles are concerned. In the North we tend to be more reserved and diffident to strangers.
If you want to make friends in Denmark don't approach them on the street. Friends are (for the most part) someone you have something in common with, so that will be a sport, hobby or something else (like the lgbt community)
Yes, for sure! Which means that it’s a little more work, but you get out what you put in (not an LGBT pun 😂).
@@RobeTrotting 😂😂
Anytime I'm out in the street, that means I have stuff to do. Be it exercise, shopping or travelling, and that means, if you chat me up, you're interrupting whatever I'm doing.
If you need help, that's fine, all of us need help from time to time, but if you're just trying to talk, you're kinda in the way. If you want to chat us up, do it at an event like theater, movies, sport events or whatever you enjoy as a hobby. We open up more if your icebreaker is relevant.
I think Americans have a hard time with Scandinavians because it's an introverted country. The US highly values extroverts, and they are shocked that a country would reverse that. As an American introvert, living in an extroverted country can be exhausting. Taking the quiet, patient route to relationships is a skill to be learned.
@@karsten69 100% this!!!!
If you meet me on the street, I'm prolly on my way from point A to point B, and yeah, you trying to chat me up = you're delaying me.
Not that it's necessarily a bad thing, but if we can talk while walking (while also walking towards my next destination), kudos to you! :)
Sure, I'll be happy to help you, if I can, but you also have to ask for it, not just stand there looking lost.
As a Dane previously living 3 years in London, I can only say: you’ll be disappointed girl……..except for similarities to your native language, but with huge variations…
maybe that was the only thing she really needed, but had to make three because why not... let's not be sarcastic and woeful :)
Why should she be disappointed? Lots of people miss London and not all people are the same or appreciate the same stuff
The Nordic Melancholy is real. Until you try living through a Nordic winter, you really have no clue if you can handle it. Personally I love the cold and dark. You two seem to be handling it on. But I know people that go into deep depression every winter. For those people, mocking south is a very good option. The other option is to stay, dress in black and write depressive poetry.
Getting a good circle of friends in Denmark can also be quite hard. A friend of mine from the UK spent a very lonely year as a consultant in Copenhagen. It is never going to be his favorite place after that. I only met him at the end of that year. I think some of it is the work attitude. You go home at five, and you normally don't want to hang around your colleagues after work. You rarely go a out for beers or eating with them. I worked in Spain for a while, and people would hang out after work much more than its common here.
Finally, the language.
It is important. I have realized that it functions as a kind of password - a Shibboleth. If someone comes up and speaks Danish to me, I feel that he is "one of us" and I give him a level of trust and cooperation, I would hesitate to give to a stranger.
Still, how often do you need the cooperation of strangers? If you prioritize getting some good friends, they are really all you need in that way. You will not get strangers from the street to help paint your house. But your friends will still help you without you ever having to learn a word of danish. So being social instead of focusing on language lessons is definitely the right choice.
Yeah, those are all great points. Friends are important to make early on and the language and other aspects of life can come in later. It’s hard to make friends at work, so getting involved with something else is key. Thanks for adding these points - very helpful 😊🇩🇰
I love the dark too Morten, time for hygge, no sticking insects and I hate when we get those heatwaves in the summer.
I have experienced a single person, probably a student, that was very willing to help in Tokyo. Same has happened in Amsterdam, but he was probably homeless, since he indicated that a little tip would be helpful.
My impression as a dane in Denmark is that nobody will ever ask if you need help. If you do have the courage to ask for help, people will follow you to the door (and make sure you got to the right place). But if you just stand there looking lost and confused, people have better things to do.
We're like eggs, thin shell, but once you break it, it flows out in excess.
Friends will also be willing to help teach you the language later on.
I've lived Greenland for just shy of a decade, and we have a saying, that winter is for sleep and rest, and summer is for fun and play which often involves finishing and hunting 😊🇬🇱
Coming from a hot and humid country one of the best things I appreciate in DK, are the 4 seasons. I love the summer when the daylight is long, the autumn when the leaves of the trees change their colors, the spring when the trees begins to grow their leaves again and even the dark grey winter has it's own beauty especially when there's snow. I've lived here in 27 years and yes it's difficult to make friends in the beginning as the danes seems so aloof towards a stranger, but once you get to know them, hvem you have friends for life 🙂. As for the language, yes danish is a difficult language but if one is prepared to learn a new language and a new culture then that challenge is easy to overcome. As a foreigner coming to a new country then you should prepare to adapt, after all if you're a guest don't expect your hosts to bend their rules for you, you should be the one abide by their rules.
As a foreigner coming to a new country then you should prepare to adapt, after all if you're a guest don't expect your hosts to bend their rules for you, you should be the one abide by their rules........ totaly agree an that is the same in every country Denmark, US, UK ,Russia, china, brasil.
As a British guy who has lived in Denmark for over 25 years, her points are all valid. I moved here because of a Danish girlfriend and my entire first network of friends came from her. My second network of friends came from the Danish woman I eventually married. Only in one place of work did I establish a network of friends that endured afterwards. Danes are incredibly introverted (anti-social isn't the right word) and suspicious of new people. Language wasn't an issue for me as I'm a linguist anyway and had started learning Danish before moving there. Being British, the weather wasn't a problem either. But moving to London.... LMFAO.
Yeah, the moving to London was too funny. It sounds like you did pretty well for yourself here though. The “work friends” thing is definitely a bit different for Americans, but we really like having that unspoken separation. It’s refreshing to keep work more compartmentalized.
Danes are introverted, but I think alot of danes expect others to initiate relationships... much like a ship leaves shores looking for a city to conquer :P
The first one is gonna be the case no matter where you go... As a Dane i wouldn't expect anything to be in Danish either if i went to America. Granted way more people speak english/american all over the world, but nobody should simply "expect" anything in their own language no matter where they go.
Well, entitled people would. The interesting question one could ask her was this. If she expects everything to be in English, how does she feel about the idea that everything in the US should be in French... it's just as big a language globally.
She's just an ignorant American thinking that everything should cater to her needs because the US is the centre of the universe. She didn't last in Denmark, and she won't last anywhere else.
That struck me as a very entitled approach to language too. I have not seen all her video, but in the clip here it came off as "Why don't they write things in /my/ language anywhere away from the airport? That is so tiring" (where I would have been much more understanding of "it turned out to be too big an effort for me to learn the language well enough for the way I want/need to interact with it").
I think it comes from having grown up with being able to speak your own language with most adults in most countries - as opposed to knowing that the moment you step outside your own country's borders, basically no one would understand you, and you had to rely on your parents to help, or do what you could with gestures (until you learned the relevant language later in life).
We just wouldn't dream of being accommodated like that abroad, because we've never tried it.
What?! You're telling me everything in Denmark is in Danish?! How can I ever overcome this challenge.. 🤔
Jokes aside, great idea for a video! Totally agree also that if you don't understand something, Danes are always 100% happy to help! There were a few times in the beginning where I was in public somewhere just LOOKING confused and people approached ME to help 😂
Yeah, it took us a while to realize that we could approach people in english and it was actually less confusing than a poorly pronounced “taler du englsk?”
Picking Up on your joke: next video danes advise people (other danes) to leave France because signs isnt written in danish. 😇
@@jimmywayne983
We want signs in Danish all over the world otherwise we will not have holidays in other countries 😂😂
@@Bo_D_Hansen haha excactly 🤣
@@Bo_D_Hansen We just need one sign: "Øl" with an arrow pointing towards a pub.
She’s got to be kidding. Right? Big big surprise that you have to learn the language of the country you move to. But almost every danish person under the age of 50 knows English. The danish winter is dreadful, but the long summer nights are amazing. Have to admit, I laughed when she said she moved to London :-) great vid guys
We dont have, that bad winters anymore.
Before we had Snow, for allmost 2 month straight.
Agree. I’m almost tempted to say, “typical American”. Expecting everything to be in English everywhere else in the world just because she’s from America and thinks the entire Universe revolves around her home country… *sigh*
@@az929292 I think she was from france
There is a French-Canadian living in Norway that have written several books about how to integrate into Norwegian society - Julien S Bourelle. You can find several of his video here on RUclips.
He says that Norwegian makes friends with activities, and not randomly or thru work. So like you guys said you met a lot of friends thru your sports teams and Danish classes. Your coworkers are only people you interact with 8-16 Monday to Friday, and you "leave them behind" when you leave the office.
It looks like the Danes and Norwegians are very similar in this behaviour.
Wow, great insights - it’s very much the same approach to friendships in Denmark.
The reason is, you don't choose your coworkers, you get forced to be around them, but you choose your spare time activities, and by that the people you socialize with in a more free environment. The day you get fired from your job, you also get fired from your coworkers, and you don't get a choice in that matter.
@@RobeTrotting there is "foreninger"/clubs for everything in denmark, its just about joining one that concern your hobbies or interests and then socializing there, at some point there will be a social event at the forening with alcohol and there even the most stuckup introvert will eventually take on the extrover hat.
In none of my many trips to the US - or any other foreign country - have I ever heard a public announcement in Danish or seen any signs in my native language. I haven't been to Greenland and they might provide such a service (being part of the Danish realm) but then again they would probably refrain out of nationalism.
However, I love the way Americans chat on the street and whenever there's a chance to exchance a joke or a friendly remark, and I do that all the time back here (to the disgrace of my grown children).
The Danish winter is why we have so much hygge! It's about embracing it, or else you'll never make it here :)
Yes 🙌🏼 you need to adopt the mindset or you will be miserable instead of enjoying the nice part of a slower pace and intimate times with people you care about.
So true. Winter is for inside hygge. Streaming good shows, Reading good books, and sorting your stamp collection, or whatever hobby you have. True that you better make the most of the hours of sunlight we do get. Let the sun shine on your face when it’s there, so you get a bit of light and warmth once in a while. Really, when you see how much people love the spring and the summer, you know why we need to have winters. I can not imagine living in a country where the sun rises and sets every 12 hours and there are no seasons. Perhaps you have to be made for it.
@@dortheschlelein5000 Exactly! We need to have contrasts in the seasons to really appreciate the hell out of it, when it gets good. I mean, look a every single Danish park, when the first sunny day of spring hits :)
Ohhh Derek thank you for a great laugh with that Picture of you in Stars and Stripes 🇺🇸 😂😂🙏🏻🙏🏻♥️♥️
Winter is said way too much, there's no winter in Denmark anymore, just a little frost a week or two, some rain and a lot of strong wind
I have been living in Denmark for 5 years. I have to say I agree with most things you guys say. Regarding learning Danish: I started Danish lessons as soon as I arrived but my teacher was terrible! I got very frustrated, only in 2020 I decided to study in a different school that I paid out my pocket and after a year I felt confident enough but it does drain a lot of your time.
Before moving to DK I lived in London for 4 years. The weather is definitely not as windy and a tad warmer but it was an definitely an unexpected turn in the story lol. I thought she was going to say somewhere in the south of Europe or like Florida haha
Nice vid guys.
I am from Argentina I used to live in Utah then for personal reasons move back to South America. I lived like a year in Argentina, my home country, and finally move to Paraguay and I live here for almost 4 years. ok thats the whole picture, in Argentina I felt like a stranger like is not my home that's one of the reasons I move out the first time, now I am in Paraguay, my whole family lives here and I have never felt more alone than now. Both countries speak Spanish and I speak Spanish, so we all understand each other but yet not real friends. All places have their challenges all depends on what attitude we have. Now I am getting ready to try Denmark. I love your channel.
Great video and analysis! Having studied, worked, lived, and traveled worldwide, I have chosen to move to Denmark for all the reasons she is leaving! I love languages and love the culture and people of Denmark. I am working hard on my Danish now so that I have a springboard to living there.
The way she described winter in Denmark, it sounded like she described living in Svalbard. I see plenty sun during winter ☀️
So do I 😊
just a Geo-Karen.... So great that she moved to london :D the "far sunnier" of the 3 countries..... Lel....
Honestly it varies from year to year. Some recent years it's been like late dark fall from September to March with not many days of blue sky. There's more days with blue sky when the winter is colder.
I think what can make a danish winter seem especially dark, is the lack of snow... Its far up north to become really dark for an extended period, but too far down to really get any snow to light up the darkness.
True. I think that in reality she just didn’t succeed to find a boyfriend. I am not joking.
I agree, the winter weather is not the selling point of Denmark. I love every other season. I still have problems with the danish’s language before getting coffee in the morning. So my wonderful danish husband serves me coffe in bed every morning. He’s one in many millions and I found him in Denmark 🇩🇰 😺❤️
Thanks for a good video. I'm Danish, so naturally I love the cold short days 🙂 That being said, I'm currently living as an expat in India, and I am struggling with the exact same things: Learning the local language, making "real" friends, and getting used to the weather. (unfortunately no "language school" here)
I remember seeing her video a year back. I can definitely relate to her points and especially if you are going through a hard time, it can exacerbate the experience. I have a few friends who have left the country, do to various hardships - but have reflected, when visiting again, that their private situation was the main course for their experience. One even came back again and is now happily living here. But most important we are all responsible for our own happiness, so cudos to her for taking the necessary action to gain hers
To cope with the nordic winter, you have to get the right mindset. Its about contrasts. From the cold and dark outside to the warm and cousy inside. And when the light comes back in spring. The light summer nights are so much more welcome because of the dark winter.
The language barrier is the same everywhere. You have to learn the lokal dominant language. You can start learning before you move. Watching movies with subtitles to get an ear for the sounds. Learning the basic words and sentences on an online course.
A good way to meet a nordic person outside their tight group of friends since childhood is to get a hobby and join an organisation for it. A sports club, outdoor organisation, cooking, crafts, building boats... There are organisations and clubs for about everything. As long as you bring something to the table you are welcome.
I heard a radio show on DR discussing the difficulties of becoming friends with danes, and that it is the number one reason why many immigrants feel frustrated and ready to give up.
One of the visiting professors compared it to the ketchup effect. You squeeze and squeeze and nothing happens, and then all of a sudden, you get waaaaay more than you bargained for!
If you're unaware of this, then your stay here can easily become very miserable.
I think it was a very clever decision you made by chosing to get friends instead of learning danish. The few times you need more than a rudimentary understanding of danish, as you mention, you can find someone to help you out. I'm actually surprised this is not _the_ first thing discussed of danish culture, when you're taking classes.
Hey Ole, the analogy you mentioned is perfect! That’s definitely what it’s like, and the Danish friends we met from doing activities instead of classes have become super close - all the ketchup 😂 Now we need to go back to Danish classes and pass the test so we can apply for permanent residency.
@@RobeTrotting Good luck with the classes 😊 Denmark needs you 👍
@@jacobbennekou4596 And some of us Danes also want you!!!
@@RobeTrotting those tests are not as difficult as some try to make them seem.
My wife delayed the culture test for more than a year than she needed to, and when she finally took it and passed with a good score she asked "was that all?" she managed the Danish test fine too (not splendid, but good enough to pass)... She had been way too afraid of the tests.
I believe that they work by intimidation. If you're good at memorising the material they give you, you hardly need to take lessons.
Here's an example of social cultural divergence.
I work at a large IT company, that has offices around the globe, with the main offices in Denmark and some in the UK.
In my job I get a lot of calls from a lot of people - when a danish employee calls me, it's quite direct and to the point - unless we know eachother quite well beforehand. When someone from the british offices call, it has to start with formalities, "Hi how are you", "Thank you for your time - I really appriciate it." etc --- and it's nice and a cultural gesture. But a call with a brit takes up to four times longer than with a dane - for the same conversational content.
And the funny part I've heard it mentioned so many times from my danish colleagues - because these calls are just intended as simple question, like you're asking the guy next to you at work.
try the dutch - it is even more direct
@@denmark98 I think, thats part of the reason, we usually get along really well 😉
A friend of mine from Britain once told me that as a native speaker of English, learning Danish is really difficult because we tend to switch to English the minute someone struggles.
Yeah! Why do you do that? Instead of just speaking slowly. We understand Danish when it is not spoken as AK-47.
If she thinks Danish winters are tough, try Canada.
As for the language, I spent a few years in France. You just learn it. I don't think Danish is particularly tough to read. Pronunciation is infamously difficult, but otherwise it's very close to English. It's not like learning Japanese or Finnish.
Well thats because english is made up from 80% old danish. Also the massive influenze the vikings had over english langauge. there is still places in england that has danish names to this day.
@@Lightflames85 You are right, except that 40% of English words come from France via other Vikings who settled in Normandy before conquering England.
Canada still has more sunlight in the winter being further south ( anything south of Edmonton in any case) plus you still get snow which light everything up - huge plus! :)
@@AxelQC we cant both be right because then we end up with 120%
@@AxelQC You mean via danish people who spoke danish and then later french? So most likely a mix of french and danish words? ;)
I watched the video previously and remembered the point about winter. As a Finn I found it rather hard to relate, but what was really peculiar was that she then moved to London, which is not known for sunny winters.
I remember a lot of the comments under her video were mocking her choice to move basically laterally to get a different weather lol I have a lot of difficulty sympathizing with her to be honest.
I think that part makes perfect sense, actually:
1) People react differently to the darkness and dreariness. Some born and bred Danes also struggle with winter depression here, while others are fine. And when a friend of mine moved to Greenland to work for 3 years, he said that they knew up there that a certain percentage had to give up because they just couldn't cope with the constant darkness (he was one of them and had to give up after a few months and break his contract). Knowing with your mind what the weather is like and that it is quite dark does not mean that you know how you will react to it emotionally.
2) In Finland I guess you have more snow than we do in Denmark? Snow really does an amazing job at brightening up everything in spite of little sun, and I absolutely love the few days (sometimes, if we're lucky, weeks) when we have snow covering the ground here instead of just 5 months of dreary November.
@@arctic_desertbecause you don't vibrate to the music of London and it's perfectly fine
But the weather is better and most importantly you have more light. That's the gist of the issue really
Hi Mike and Derek! Thanks so much for this reaction video! ❤️ It's always fun watching unbiased reactions to my content. I believe we agree that the challenges I faced in Denmark are challenges you continue to face, but I'm delighted to hear that it's not taking away from your enjoyment of Denmark 🇩🇰. As I've mentioned on numerous occasions, Denmark is a wonderful country with many positive aspects to it.
A point about the title of the video. Sadly knowing these things intellectually before you arrive and actually feeling their effects on you day to day is rather different. I know Danish is spoken in Denmark, but I didn't know how alienated I would feel when on numerous social occasions everyone around me continued to speak Danish. I knew it would be darker, but I couldn't have foreseen the effects prolonged darkness has on me. 😞
I completely agree that saying 'antisocial' is harsh. I believe I was going for 'asocial', but I've since learned that those two aren't the same. I suppose the majority of people I did meet are fairly introverted. Nevertheless, I'm grateful for the plethora of wonderful friends I made there. The fact we've remained friends during this pandemic and all its challenges is a testament to the strength Danish friendships can have once they are forged. I trust your friendships with Danish people will be similarly productive.
Nevertheless, I did pass Prøve i dansk 3 with flying colours. I could understand everything and speak (with mistakes). Unfortunately being able to sort of express myself and make patchwork of what I was trying to convey was no longer what I wanted to do. I wanted to be in an environment where I could express myself freely and eloquently without worrying about mispronouncing or whether it was 'en' or 'et' for a word. Sure, I could have tried for longer, but seeing as you also decided to stop learning Danish, I'm sure you'll understand the difficulty that this can pose on anyone.
A point that I have not added in that specific video (though it is in other ones), is that I was doing a PhD in Denmark (no, I didn't get SU). PhDs are widely known to be extremely stressful and difficult. This, coupled with lots of unrelated academic pressures, did not make my integration or the winter any easier. Once I was finished with the PhD, I needed to regroup and think about what was best for me.
I moved to London not for the weather specifically, rather for the ease of integration (language), the abundance of opportunity in my field (computer science and finance), and the proximity to other European countries where many of my friends live. That being said, London weather IS better than the weather in Copenhagen and Odense. There's far less rain, it's much less overcast, and as a result there are more sun hours. I definitely agree that England has different average numbers. However it seems that London itself has a microclimate that's more favourable. It's not Spain by any means, but it's definitely an improvement.
I hope to continue watching your videos and be a part of your journey. Who knows, maybe we can meet up later this year when I head to Denmark for a visit? 😊
I appreciate your ability to take critique.
But I would have appreciated if you did some more research before dissing our climate too 🙂
No hard feelings, I just get the impression that it wasn't DK you wanted to go to in the first place.
Its like you are forgetting the people you wanted to talk to, have the exact same problems with language like you do/did. English is not the native tounge in Denmark, so people work hard to communicate and do their best. They also want to relax with friends, not "working" for every sentence, so in social situations, you cant expect all the danes changing language for 1 person in the room. And all danes love when people try to learn danish, we are a small country so its a sign of love and respect, that you work on it. I worked for a company, in Denmark, where the language was english att meetings etc. But they also paid new workers to take danish lessons. 1 guy did it for 5 years, still not talking danish... 1 girl, 2 months and then she asked people to talk danish to her, its the most impressive thing ive ever seen. I think that its very different how people learn and how fast. But the most important thing is being happy, and im glad that you are happy where you live now :-)
Hi @HouseofEl used to live in London now live in Copenhagen, and I got your point about the weather, totally. London is not an easy place to live and there are so many downsides..and at the same time it' the most incredible, amazing City. It can be hard to make friends there as well, but being a native English speaker you'll have zero probs. Strategically speaking, your choice seems very sound. For some it gets tough with kids and family, but until that point, you can live a comfortable and privileged life there - obv with pros and cons, exactly like here in Copenhagen.
You two are such a great asset to Denmark ❤️🧡💙💚
Well you never know when you move to another country how you're gonna settle in. And i suppose the long dark winters is an experience. We do have something called winter depressions. A lot of people vacation in southern Europe during winters just to get some sunshine and get warmed up.
She didn't find happiness in Denmark so she did the right thing and moved on to somewhere else. Good for her, i hope she settles in better where ever it may be.
Agreed 110% - when you aren’t happy you have to make that change.
I lived and wirked 2 diffrent places in the usa, los angeles and chicago, found my life better in chicago, I loved but going back home was diffucult, my friends was likexwhat are ypu doing here
I don't think you guys give yourself enough credit for how much you adapted to "us" and wanted it, I think it goes for the most part of European countries if you want to make friends, you need to adapt, that doesn't mean you have to loose who you are. Even with friends or work, you adapt to the group you are hanging out with, but you are still you.
I think you are pretty much spot on with the analysing of the video, language, friends and the weather, I had a chuckle about moving to London instead, their shortest day is 42 minutes longer than ours, so maybe she has a point.
Danes can be hard to get to know, but usually the "error" is to try to connect in places, where we don't get involved with other people. Stopping us at the street for anything other than asking for directions won't work well. In general we aren't very interested in shallow relationships, and this can probably be seen as being closed off, if you don't expect to put a lot of work into getting a connection with others.
The winter is dark, which is why sunshine comes as pills 😉
Great advice all around Camilla. You're spot on that there needs to be a purpose behind the connection to really lead to friendship.
She moved to Denmark so of course things are in Danish, but people start with English early in school, so people change language when you speak to them in English. She came unprepared and with unrealistic expectations to begin with.
There are things that you do in the wintertime and there are other things in the summertime. If it doesn't rain, then you don't appreciate the sun as much. You appreciate that there are different things to do depending on the seasons.
In Denmark you can go to the cinema and watch a movie and watch a movie in the original language only with Danish subtitles except movies for children. In Germany they also change the spoken language to German. It means it is harder if you are not good at the language.
You don't make friends on the street in Denmark. A person you only meet once is more like a “bekendtskab” not a “ven”. Get a hobby then you have something in common to talk about and then you can make many friends.
One of the fun things about Danish is to go to another country and speak Danish to each and nobody else know what you are saying. It is like a secret language. Just don't use English words in the middle of a Danish sentence if nobody else should know what you are talking about. You can not do it in Norway and Sweden. If go to Japan and ask a random person on the street where something is then most of the time, they don’t speak English.
Stine You still might want to watch that "dane speaks to dane in a foreign country and no one understands them". in 1957 I was at a large boy scout camp in England. We were allowed to venture into London by train ourselves, and one day 5 of us 15-year old boys found ourselves in the compartment with a beautiful young girl, and we spent all the time from Guildford to Liverpool street commenting on her looks, and what we would like to do with/to her. When we got toLiverpool str. she said "Tak for turen", and left 5 embarresed scouts!
When I lived in London i found the winters worse than Denmark. Sure winter starts a bit later, but in Denmark at least when you get frost it clears the air and lowers the humidity. London is just cloudy and damp October to March.
Yeah, it can’t be that different from Denmark as far as the weather or daylight.
1. When moving to a foreign country, please don't be surprised that it is - foreign. If you want to stay and to integrate, there is no way to get around learning the language. 2. Danes are not anti-social, on the contrary, they are very social, However, they are, true enough, social in closed circles. And it may be difficult to get inside. However, there are differences from region to region. In Funen where I live, it's quite normal to talk to strangers without being considered weird, and people can have conversations in the supermarket or in the street. But it is, of course, different in bigger cities. 3. The Danish winter is absolutely horrible and even most Danes would agree on that. This is why in winter they stampede to southern Europe or even further south. Or go skiing in places where it might be cold but where the sun shines.
I think making friends can be harder in Denmark. However we are also more loyal i feel like. Once we are friends, its a friendship we value a lot.
Yes, for sure - once you make Danish friends you’re in for the long haul! 😊🇩🇰 At least from our experience.
Being Latin I agree. There is the reputation of warm countries that we laugh and drink and share food (which is accurate). However, it is weird in the 'good time' countries to ask stuff like "do you believe in God?" etc. I think some benefit from the shallow warmth and some benefit from the chillier loyal relationships (and I'm not hating on either)
@@arctic_desert I agree. A good mix of the two is prefered.. But i its a culture thing as well. Very hard to change sadly.
Same here in Norway-we appreciate close frienships more than superficial ones. That does NOT mean, however, that we don`t like small talk (heard this about us Scandis)..at least I am an exception to that rule. Check out the videos of "american missionaries in norway".
Kudos to her for realising she needed to leave for her to be happy! Reading the comments on that video it seems the thing that really had Danes up in arms was the language thing. But I helped a couple of friends as well as my husband fill out forms and government documents and was ashamed and frustrated that there was no or only limited options in English. That being said, there's almost always the option to ask a Dane for help - government officials have been super patient and helpful with my husband!
For comparison I went on exchange in the French part of Switzerland. We were issued a form in French that needed to be filled in and mailed (as in by post) to the municipality - that's kind of daunting first week in a foreign country.
When I got home I signed up for the organisation that help the exchange students coming to Aarhus get settled. We had three days where local officials were on campus with their computers to help these kids get registered!
All in all: obviously England will be easier to navigate if you only speak English, but I believe most other non-english nations would've posed a much bigger challenge than Denmark (or our Scandinavian cousins)
Good points, it’s always best to make yourself happy - even if some of the things could have been predicted or avoided with more effort, happiness is the most important. She also has other videos describing all of the great things about Denmark too.
Your reply is an example of never really understanding the reason for things being the way they are.
Denmark is a mono-linguistic region. You might be able to find forms and such in Swedish or German since they're the closest linguistically different countries. Denmark also being so small and of relatively little importance means that it's a decentlæy rare occurrence to get tourists outside of Copenhagen and Aarhus. There's simply no need to do the effort.
The region in Switzerland you mentioned is duo-linguistic and as such there are often official documents in a bridging language since it's possible that people are unable to communicate in written form in the language.
@@nielsjensen4185 Try going to the vest coast then... you'll more often be approached by someone speaking German than anything else. I lived in Ribe for 3 yrs and heard about 50/50 in terms of Danish and German, at least in terms of people approaching me on the street.
So no.. you DEFINITELY need to make the effort.
@@Litvan I live in Esbjerg and even if they get TV signals from Germany it's still designated Danish region. You need to go further south to Tønder to be able to find forms that are in dual-language as the norm.
I learned language quite quickly and it was free. However I didn’t have to work as my husband was Danish.Surprised she didn’t learn Danish as I met lot of friends at language school. Her approach to making friends was weird. You usually make friends through work or sports/fitness clubs. Totally agree with the weather. Really don’t like October to April here unless sunny cold winter day which is rare. I have lived here 24 years and still really hate weather in Denmark. I am still here coz my kids are here and social welfare system is great so no money worries and good healthcare
Yeah, we talk about Danish class as a great way to make friends in a few videos - we are still close with a lot of our friends from classes in 2018 😊🇩🇰
British people are reserved and don’t talk to strangers in bigger cities either
It is very true, we Danes do socialize a lot in sports clubs. They provide an informal environment and it sheds people of their differences in social and economic statues. It's a bit weird, but socializing is often done in the locker room. It's a good place to earn new friendships, and it also shows reliability of people meeting up, which is a very highly valued trait in Danish culture.
Complaining about the weather is pretty much the Danish national pastime. So you still not liking the weather here actually makes you quite Danish 😄
@@Khenfu_Cake I eat herring, Grønlangkål medister og flæskesteg så jeg må give dig ret. Jeg er da dansk nu😱
She's moving to LONDON because of the winter weather?? Makes me wonder how honest she is being about her opinions. I'm an ex Londoner & an 🇬🇧Anglo-Dane🇩🇰. That takes the language out of my own experience (though not fluent, know enough to get by with pronounciation no problem). I haven't lived in Denmark as an adult so cannot comment on the social side.
But London for better winter weather?!!
Thank you for the interesting videos!
She does not like the dark cold rainy winter in Denmark and moves to London 🤣🤣🤣
It's the funniest thing I've heard in a long time 🤣🤣🤣
She has probably only lived there for 1 month while it was high summer when she made the video 🤣🤣🤣
Haha we have to admit, that was the funniest part of the video. She does have some points where I can see that she had a tough time, but it’s work to live abroad 😊
winter is terrible.... Did you look at a map? Copenhagen is situated at 55'40 North. The equivalent in the US is Newfoundland or south-most of Alaska. It is more north than Edmonton, Canada :)
Yes 🙌🏼 people are always surprised by that, at least our friends in America are.
@@RobeTrotting Was too when I realise looking at a globe how far south the US actually is. And o this wasn't my first time looking at either a map or globe. Just never really looked at the altitude. But I can admit that I was a grown man when i finally realised. Hehe.
I am a Dane here from Jutland and yes Danish is difficult to learn and respect for you will learn it. you must know I am always ready to help you. 👍🏻😊
That’s awesome to validate from the source - we always feel like we can approach someone for help with Danish 😊🇩🇰
The winter makes us all want to move away 😂😂
It’s absolutely fair she didn’t want to live in Denmark, just because you move and get a great job doesn’t mean you going to love living in this country. I totally understands why she moved to London.
I used to live there and it took me about 3 years to finally feel at home and finding great friends. It takes a lot of efforts when you move and you should love to stay there otherwise it’s not worth anything.
Love you guys. You have such a good insight and a way with words^^
Aw, thanks Lasse 🇩🇰😊
@@RobeTrotting I thank you, you brings such good content and are real about it! I have an american friend living here in Vejle and we love to watch you content and discuss it and it has really opened my eyes to how different danes and americans are - even though we, danes, think we are the same.
You helped him alot to ask some, for him, difficult questions. That to me was a given. Thank you guys for your content again, you make a difference!
@RobeTrotting Thank you,
It was particularly interesting to see a 'react'-video from someone that aren't Danish to why someone else got to the point where they had to decide to leave.
One thing I am a bit puzzled about is the very factual comment she made that ministerial sites are only in Danish and it can be hard to find out what you are expected to do and cannot do.
The reason I am puzzled is that I almost always - when on pages from government, municipaity, various authories find a button that says "English" that will switch the entire page to English. Some pages where it is relevant (pages addressing refugees, asylum seekers, etc. also often have a link referring them to a Arabic, Farsi, Kurdish, Turkish, and others. I actually even believe it has become a legal requirement that all public and governmental sites are in at least Danish and English and where relevant in the major languages spoken by other immigrants.
But I wonder why that is not the experience? You seemed to concur. Obviously I rarely switch to the English version, but I have tried and at first glance it appeared to me to be a full version in English too. But am I mistaken? Is it only a brief or summary of the main page, that contains much less information? Can you perhaps comment - if you find the time, of course! 🙂
The darkness in Winter I understand. I personally totally embrace the darkness and love it, and I love to move together in the couches around the candles and have some hot drinks and cheese ;-) so I have no problem with the dark months, but my wife really suffers and she have winter depression, so she has to travel for 3 weeks 2-3 times during the winter season. She goes to some warm Asian country - preferably Sri Lanka - and spend some time in the sunlight out there, as this is her only chance of recharging her batteries. I go with her as often as I can, but she needs it more than I do - I just go for the pleasure of the journey. But this is just to say, that I understand how much it can affect people who are sensitive to darkness, as the woman who made the video clearly is.
There are ways to mitigate that to some extent, but as I understood she had already tried some of the remedies she felt comfortable with. My wife has a UV-lamp in her study that is on for a couple of hours each day to boost her serotonin level.
Thanks again for your interesting take on this.
And so happy to see you guys living and apparently enjoying life in Denmark. That is wonderful.
The thing about learning Danish in class is that you can learn a lot about the language (grammar etc.) but real learning happens through using it in stead.
Couldn’t agree with you more. Great point Peter 😊🇩🇰
Loved loooved this video. Thanks guys for being truthful to yourselves in your opinions and for the openness to such a different culture to the point of embracing it as gracefully as ya’ll do! Very funny the London weather thing. I’d add the very gray/rainy weather.
I respect her views and good she found a place better for her then. She might have too many expectations, and I can agree that she should have done better research, but also some things you only know by experience. I love your views and analysis of the video and comparing it to your own experience and expectations. Good idea for a video.
Thanks so much Sara. This was fun to compare some other views and from an experience we didn’t have. She was very honest and respectful and I can see how London is an easier place to live as a foreigner. PLUS they have a Philadelphia themed pub that we love 😂
Having come from the UK, I can see why she would choose the UK over Denmark and you have covered that well. Yes, the winters are dark, sooo dark, but the flip side is the summers are so light. I love that as soon as it lightens up, people emerge, it suddenly becomes so vibrant. I love the colours here, it just fills me with joy. Oh, the other thing she'll notice in London is the crime, it is so much more safe and peaceful in Denmark.
Derek mentions Melodi Grand Prix, and my ears immediately perks up. 😄I'm looking forward to it SO much, I'm watching the Norwegian selection (and will be following the Swedish, and have listen to the songs released in Finland). Ah! I can't get enough of this competition. Fun, joy, and lots of music. What's not to like?
It’s so wonderful, we love to watch it every year and usually at least the Norwegian competition too because we have a lot of Norwegian friends 😊
I gather you never have worked in the Melodi Gran Prix, if you had (and I have when it was held here in Copenhagen last time) the LAST thing you wanna do is seing it "live" on TV
@@sidewind131258 Wow, way to be a negative nelly.
@@betwixttales Have you worked behind the scenes ? I did, and it was hard, boring, non thankfull and nonglamorous. I.e. a honest comment
@@sidewind131258 Yaeh, we got that. But you really feel like this is the place to deliver your honesty? People sharing how much they love the competition, and this is the time and place you decide to crap on it. For what reason other than to mention (repeatedly) that you worked on the show? I don't care how much you hated working on the show. I didn't ask to hear that.
you guys seem super chill and reflective, love to see you're videos
Thank you Mads, we try to be that way so I'm happy if it comes through :)
Thanks for watching!
I love how non-scripted this video was/felt 👍 just real honest reactions and discussion. Five stars 👏
Aw, thank you Sabine, super glad to hear that you enjoyed it 🇩🇰😀
When me and my family need a winter vacation, we sit down and think of places to go. And EVERY time, we come up with sunny, sunny London. :)
😂
But...are "The 3 things they don't tell you" that:
a) Moving to Denmark, it's good to learn to speak Danish
b) Danes are a bit reserved
c) Denmark is to the north, so Winters are dark, and summers are light.
@robe Trotting, aren't those 3 things pretty much at the top of the list of the things people mention about Danes and Denmark? How did "they" not tell her that? ;-)
I kind of assumed it was normal to do just a little research into where ever you decide to go. A quick google search would have told her all the stereotypes about Denmark and the Danes - and there's a lot of truth to it. Especially in regards to how Danes act in public space, or how social we are in certain situations. We are helpful, but don't expect small talk with strangers.
She also, for some weird reason, seems to really be negatively affected by the fact that other countries have their own languages. I, as a Dane, would not expect any information in Danish if I was to move to New York City, London, Paris, Berlin, Tokyo, or Nairobi. It doesn't work that way - even for an international language like English. A lot of things are translated into English in your everyday life in Denmark. However, there's also free Danish language classes, and a lot of people to help you through the day - and there's always your own embassy to contact. Her point about the language seems weird and misplaced.
one problem is that we have "venner" and then we have "bekendte" and it takes a bit to become a ven =) .. its all about trust.
For sure, and when you do reach “ven” it’s for the long haul! 😊🇩🇰
I am Portuguese and have absolutely no problems talking to people in random places, be it the supermarket or at a busstop, it of course depends on the situation and whether something "natural" to discuss pops up. In Portugal it´s very easy to get shallow friendships (back in the 90s, might have changed), people you might meet for various activities but otherwise aren´t strongly connected with, in Denmark friends are usually for life, at least the ones I have. I don´t find the Danes to be anti-social at all, they are just different. Casual friendships in Denmark are usually work/activity related.
Live and let live. It's not about whether she was prepared for moving abroad. She lived for more than 4 years in Denmark and had to realise that it wasnt for her. I guess anybody would feel disencouraged when they realise that some aspects of a life abroad can't be reconsiled. I understand why she is moving to the UK from a language perspektive. London is far more cosmopolitan than Copenhagen, so i guess she will have a better time socially as well. Since she chooses to stay in nothern Europe, the weather can''t be as big a problem as she makes it out to be. I hope she finds whatever she is looking for.
Your conclusion is spot on.
Listening with a critical ear, it could sound as if map reading skills, and the concept of countries vs. states has been a bit of a revelation... after all, Denmark is at around the 55th parallel, comparable to parts of Canada and Alaska. Also not known for their tropical climate. In comparison to their coastal climate, Denmark clearly has the benefit of the Gulf stream, making it a lot milder, than the North American counterparts. Which to some degree explains grey dark winters as opposed to crisp white arctic ones.
She's absolutely right about the culture not being very open. We don't talk to strangers unless we have a reason to, and anyone just chatting up strangers on the street will come off as weird... I personally enjoy this aspect of our culture but i can see how an extroverted foreigner would struggle.
I think they are slightly more open to that sorta thing in the more rural areas though
People have told us that the more rural areas have more openness to chatting and taking to random people. We struggled with this a little bit but now it’s the opposite. When we return to the states we’re like “why are you talking to me? I don’t know you.” 😂
There's definitely a difference between the rural areas and the cities (especially Copenhagen). Even just small things such as people casually saying "Hej/godaften" (or "Mojn" haha) when they pass each other when they're out in public, doesn't matter if they're strangers everything is just kind of more relaxed and slow paced in a way.
But even in cities there's also some sub cultures that are more open than the norm.
When the days are short in the winter, that are proportionally longer in the summer, so you get to have sunshine from 04:00 to 23:00 :)
Totally worth the cost of the winter :)
I remember seeing that video about the same time I found your channel and it was soooo refreshing/encouraging to see your channel for that reason. It is complicated being an immigrant/expat of course - more complicated than being a "guest" in another place BUT it's ridiculous to expect the wide open arms of comfort when you're not in your birth country. Because I'm here for the infrastructure, healthcare, and research, hell yes I am going to put a little Danish flag out for birthdays and study Danish every day. It's weird to say but it saved my life. Also... maybe it's a gay subcommunity thing but I haven't had trouble making friends here
Winter sucks, but the summer months compensate with spring that at times feels almost magical and days in late June where the sun hardly sets. And mentioned in the video, one can take a trip away to see the sun if really needed.
Also London - please.
London is not exactly the place to go to see the sun more and it also rains there quite a bit, in fact in 2020 it rained 170.5 days in London and in Copenhagen the average is 170 days. The average hours of Sunshine in Copenhagen is 1.780 a year and for London the number is 1.400, only the hours are distributed differently and the average hours of sun is like 50 for Copenhagen in January and it is 54 in London.
Moving to a foreign country is not easy.
Her title is weird to me, i feel it's common to be told these are challenges when moving here.
Hope she's found somewhere that suits her better!
That’s true, we didn’t think of that, but everyone knows that Danish is spoken in Denmark and everyone tells you that the winters are tough and Danes can take longer to befriend new people until they warm up. These things were all explained to us very quickly.
I have an english friend who speaks danish fluendly. She says, that the reason english speakers doesn’t learn to speak danish is because its to easy to give up since many in Denmark speaks english. Actually she says english people are too lazy to learn, her words not mine. Living in Amsterdam for 4 years I know, how hard it can be to learn a different language. You are in a conversation, thinking you are doing great and suddenly the people your are with change the subject or talk about some memory that they have in common. Or a joke. But you just have to stay strong. When I first went to Amsterdam I got a job in a dutch bookstore without speaking much dutch. I had to learn quickly. My sister did the same, when she went to Germany to live. She got a job in a german speaking company. Now she often hears from germans, that she speaks like a native german. I also have a spanish friend here in Denmark, it was hard for her to find a job in Spain, so she went to Denmark and got a job in an Elder People’s home and she went from not knowing a word in danish to be quite good in 3 months! When I was living in Amsterdam sometimes people also spoke english to me, but I keept insisting on speaking dutch. Yes I got tired too. But you just have to stay strong, start listning only to danish like music and talk and so on and it doesn’t matter if you don’t understand all or nothing. And stop listning to english or talk english at least for a period like 14 days😊. Demand people listen to you, demand people keep speaking danish to you. It takes a lot of patience in the beginning, but suddenly it goes fast. And it is also an good idea to get a job in a danish speaking Company for the long run. 😅I guess is going to be hard for you, since you both are english speakers, its like two smokers trying to quit smoking togther, but everything is possible. And right now I’m quite irritated that I didn’t wrote all this in danish.
To be fair, even if you know these things from a logical point, it is a lot more difficult living them. Especially the darkness thing. I mean, even as a dane I get moody and passive i the winter. The sky was clear today, so I prioritised going for walk in my lunch break instead of eating because I know I need it. I know a lot of people romanticise the winter and even say the prefer it. But Vitamin D deficiency and winter depressions are real things, that even native scandinavians struggle with. I can't imagine how hard it must be to handle if you are not brought up in this environment. Visiting is fine, first winter is fine, but the fourth one must be really hard.
When My husband and I married (1984) we moved to Vienna, he is Viennese. (Vienna is the capitol of Austria). He was enrolled in a music course and wanted to have his degree. Perfect understandable. So we moved there. In school here in Denmark I have learned German since 6th grade , so I knew some German, but I didn't know dialect/the other type of German they speak in Austria. Like I went shopping, and paying I reallized I needed a bag for getting my groceries home, so I asked: "Darf iche eine Tüte haben?" Her mouth formed a very pointed,very small O. And she answered: "Nein sie dürfen eine SACK haben". So that very first shopping spree on my own I learned the difference in shopping bags in German and Austrian. And I still laugh about it. With time my friends started laughing at me because they expected me to speak more German than Austrian and now living in Denmark and we meet Germans they believe I'm Austrian. So funny.
It kinda sounded like she expected, that moving to Denmark would be like moving to another state.
I do get her points, but just felt like she hadn't done any research before moving, or were willing to change her ways of doing things.
Yes our winters are long and dark, but you can't beat our summer.
Long days filled with sun and light. Sitting outside at 22.00, and its still light out. Can't beat that.
For sure, those are the best nights and the summers that are good are just fantastic 🇩🇰🌞
What!!! anti-social!! that hurt, a lot!
We are a careful people, well most Scandis are,
More like the winter months..we prefer the hygge - pulled in, covered up and watchful, but when summer comes....friendships bloom! and the beer flows!
I moved to Portugal for work 38yrs ago, didn't speak Portugese & they didn't speak much English; in those days
You learn, adapt, adjust and mesh into the culture, little by little
Now it's like a second home even though I've been back in DK, for a long while
And swapping DK for England, that's just hilarious..weather was never the problem..it was the language!
great to see you guys!
hello from windy, freezing Hundested 🌸❄🥶
Yeah agreed here, antisocial is far from the case. And you’re spot on about the nice part of the winter months.
Had no idea you were in Portugal - what a great experience. Derek’s mom was thinking of splitting time there at some point.
Windy and cold here too, but perfect for some cozy nights inside 😊🇩🇰🥶
@@RobeTrotting Portugal is an amazing country, full of the lovliest people...food, weather & culture are to die for! It's a country of opposites from snow to beach, rich to poor, strong cultural roots to extreme international flavor!! 💚🤎❤ Well worth a long stay!
I'm Italian and I can tell you that making friends here is difficult too: we normally connect to strangers quite easily... but is that a friend? It taķes time to become friends here too and our best friends are the ones we met in our youth, too. Let's not confuse shallow contacts and friendship, two completely different kinds of human connection.
Sure, but many people aren’t open to new friendships and all friendships start off with shallow contact. It’s still difficult.
Loved the video. I don’t think her attitude were as bad as some has commented. She did at least give it 4 years and if you still don’t feel happy and at home in a country, then you owe it to yourself to make a change. I did burst out laughing though when she said: so I’ve now moved to London! I’ve just returned to Denmark after living in London for 10 years. London has the exact same weather as in Denmark and the winter is just as long. The only difference is that public transportation shuts down every time there’s the tiniest amount of snow lol. If it wasn’t so frustrating when trying to get to work, it would be funny. We are literally talking about half a centimetre of snow delaying trains and busses for hours 😂. Moreover, people are only VERY slightly chattier than Danes. They don’t just start chatting to strangers on the tube, so I hope she doesn’t get too disappointed. They are more polite and considerate in the public space though, so maybe that will help making her feel more welcome over there 👍🏻
My wife moved to Århus for 2 months for study/work reasons, she doesn't talk danish or swedish (knowing swedish would not have helped much). What was really awkward rude behaviour from her Danish hosts and in the workplace was that no one didn't talk english to her, they talked danish and that's all. She felt really confused and not welcomed. She slowly started to understand danish but overall experience from that time wasn't nice at all.
That’s very strange, I’ve only ever heard the opposite - that we speak too much English to foreigners and this not giving them a chance to practice and learn English.
Denmark is such a small country, that even if friends move away (unless they leave the country), they are 4 hours away at the most...so holding onto childhood friends is easier
True, and it’s hard to compete with someone’s childhood friends.
@@RobeTrotting It blody well depends on who your childhood's friends have become 😨 Mine went drunks, druggies, prostitutes and one or two is doing time for, let's call it, make sure the victim didn't survive. Other than that, as Freddy Mercury and Queen sang, Friends will be firends
That is how it is living in a city, unless you know people, or approach them. I'm a Swede, living in Sweden - obviously it is easier without the language barrier. I slowly approached the girls working at my local café. I don't know how, but now I have deep conversations with some of them - or at least talking about current events. To me it seems like she really has preconceived notions from a select couple of people.
She strikes me as a really positive and fun person to be around. I'm baffled she didn't make more friends (acquaintances) with such a radiant aura.
I really enjoyed the video, but what i loved is that both of you said "hej hej" instead of goodbye, it's a small detail but it makes me feel like you really are enjoying your time here in denmark and are maybe without thinking picking up on the customs and language. kind regards!
Aw, that's so sweet to hear Ida, we do feel really self conscious about our Danish, but that's a simple way to insert a bit of it in the video as well as some other "Easter eggs" that don't stand out unless you're Danish and get the joke right away.
Girl was mad. You guys had given multiple examples on how to socialize little by little. I think maybe another reason she couldn't encounter anyone was due to her energy, she is now in London and still upset, I hope this woman finds her happy place one day!
Good work guys, I have been living in Danish for circa 20 years, it is not perfect of course but personally I love it, and I am tired of people judging this nice country harder than it deserves and by the way, Danish grammar is much easier than the grammar of other languages, think if she was in Germany or French, grammar is harder and fewer people speaks good English ;)
Most danes take d-vitamin, which is classed as an 'anti-dression' med during winter. which is makes a lot of people think we are only happy because we are 'drugged'.
I think this misunderstanding is sad.
Curling up under a blanket with someone you love, have candles going and enjoy the stars with a cup of tea - was better then that?
Oh yeah, we did hear that. We should have put that in our video on things Americans always get wrong about Denmark 🤦🏻
the funny thing is, that you only need to be out in the sun about 10 minutes 2-3 times a week (getting sun on arms, legs and face) to get enough vit. D And it is "saved up" in the body fat, so you have vit. D in the winter period. But eating some salmon or taking a low D. vit. Will have you covered in the dark winter. I also think that when you are born and raised in a 4 season country, you dont think about it that much :-) I love the "dark" season, with blankets, pillows, candles, movies etc.. its like the world is more quiet :-)
@@annestovgaard681 Me too, it's low-key my favorite time of the year^^
I'm a Dane and have lived in Denmark all my life. I definitely feel the darkness of winter emotionally, but I agree with your statement. You make more of an effort, thus creating hygge and surviving another winter and enjoy the summer sun! Also I think you should be unrealistically unlucky, to go a few months, without a ray of sun! We have really cold and sunny days in winter aswell.
Yeah for sure. I think she is from Macedonia, so probably milder and sunnier winters (but im not really sure). Definitely longer days.
i'm pretty sure there's a deeper reason why she moved out of denmark. there's also a possibility that denmark wasn't what she imagined it to be, and it's the disappointment that really made her move out.
That's a good point, Denmark has a lot of buzz from news stories and social media posts about things like the green kayak program in Copenhagen and such - but that's not daily life.
So true. All she said as reasons and so are just psychological projections. ;)
Always looking forward to watching your videos. As good as you guys are you deserve alot more followers. She had alot of good points for leaving but was stunned when she said London. I'm Cuban living in Vegas, I have lived in many places , Spain, Venezuela, Puerto rico, new York and Seattle for 27 years. I can understand how she felt isolated living in Denmark, yes a safe country , amazing social system but having lived in seattle it was the same feeling. Very educated people, polite but it was very superficial and the weather didn't help . I have traveled to eastern Europe and the people are definitely not going to chat a stranger , in a new York subway you could be dead and someone will talk to you. One of my favorite countries is Switzerland, I have been there a few times. It's a great country if you live there but the people are super strict, very introverted. As one resident of Switzerland said we are very private but once we know you after 25 years we will be your best friend.
Speak your best "bad" Danish to the Danes... They will love you for trying and help you get better 🙂
That’s my experience.
My cousin and his family with two small children moved to Copenhagen from the US for a few years and absolutely loved it. Except for the prices of everything and few sunny days, everything cost so much more than in the US - but there are museums and playgrounds and lots of free things to do. There are no clothes dryers and other things that waste electricity are not used. Their children were in a lovely pre-school and learned Danish easily. Even young kids spoke both English and Danish and some even three languages. They really enjoyed living there but they had no car and no elevator and they were on the 5th floor. But they were healthy from walking and biking. Everyone seemed to know how to knit and taught my cousins wife to make beautiful items. It's true about restaurants- not a lot and not affordable. There are pubs and they will serve you one pickle and one sausage with no bread. (And PS They had few local friends but that didnt bother them as they were so busy with their own kids. They had a few close friends from school mom group and from his work so that was fine with them. And the strudels and pastries were wonderful.)