Koj Yuav Kuv Vim Daim Dr Degree. 3/3/2023
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- Опубликовано: 9 сен 2024
- Koj Yuav Kuv Vim Daim Dr Degree.
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Hope for a better dream for a better Doctor tomorrow 🙏🙏🙏❤️🌹
💯❤️🌹
💯👏👏👏
I’m glad you know your worth!
I love your mind set to keep your degree cus it'll help you in your life.
Koj ua yog lawm os me vivncaus dhuav lub neej ua noj loj2 thiab tiam txiv neej cuag li ib tug nom
I am not a doctor, and I can't live the life of a typical Hmong woman. I refuse to mistreat myself. I know there are a lot of haters, but I choose to love myself first! I have no problem standing alone.
Agree! I'm the same.
txiv neej hmoob muaj ib feem ma siab lim liam tshaj plaws txawm yuav ntse kawm ntawv siab baum li twg lo txoj kev phem lim hiam caij tsuj poj niam muaj ib feem lawv yeej g tso tseg tu siab kawg li os
It doesn't matter how educated you are, you still need to be smart about life. You still have to learn how to love yourself and know your self-worth.
Her mindset on her degree is so true! We all need to teach our daughters this! Once you earn your degree you will always have it. It is what keeps you independent!
I still can't believe that you, a doctor in the U.S., ALLOWED your old-school father to decide who you should marry. You are always better off happy & alone than unhappy & married, IMO.
By the way, there are good men and bad men in every group of people out there. Whether you remarry a Hmong or non-Hmong, I hope you make sure it's someone who shares similar values/morals and interests with you, their personality matches well with yours, and the love between you two is genuine and strong, otherwise, it's not going to work out long term. And if you never find the right guy, that's okay----you are a highly paid doctor, you don't need a man to complete your life.
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Why do you have to follow an uneducated person’s directions. You know what is right and wrong so do the right things is no wrong to anyone. Whoever gets you wrong leave that person for good up to your level. You are doing the good so nothing wrong with leaving him. You waited too long to get rid of loser.
I feel the same as you sister. Hmong eat and drink to die and not to live. This is an unhealthy lifestyle, but nobody wants to change.
Totally agree even covid only changed 4 few years then back in hmong normal life style LOL
@@maimoua1371 even during covid, some hmong people will be having drinking / karaoke almost every weekend.
Yep some Hmoob people live to eat and not eat to live. I'm a woman myself but I will not allow other woman to make me drink like there is no tomorrow.
🙋🏻♀️like, kom kho cov party problems!
Cov laus ces qhia hloov tsis tau lawm, tabsis peb cov hluas hloov xwb!
Noj kom tsawg, noj ua zoo nkauj zoo nraug, noj ua kev cai xwb!
Cov laus mas pheej yuav kom noj nchuav lug, noj seem, noj tsau tsau, noj so noj so xwb ces peb thiaj txom txom nyem khwv, txom nyem sab, txom nyem poob nyiaj ntau tag npaum no lawm ntag lo!!
Peb yuav tau txhob coj coj tsheej pab menyuam mus nkim pes xij tom party lawm nawb hehe
Thiab! Txhob mus zov zov hmo tom tsev xyom cuab lawm vim tamsim no tsis muaj tus tuag rau peb zov lawm, Yuav pab zov ces mus cov hmo lawv thau los pam! Nawb lawv aw!..
for a doctor you just blindly picked a random stranger to marry? your parents played a role, but you didn't think for yourself and make your own choice. for god's sake, you're a doctor, think for yourself and say NO.
your ex screwed you over since you just picked anyone to marry. and now you blaming Hmong peeps.
Right. She shouldn't blame hmong ppl or its culture, but instead blame her parents and herself. Apparently education doesn't teach smart or life making decisions.
Agreed! She had a say in all of this but decided to go along with others because she couldn't think for herself. And with a low self esteem, she was probably happy someone wanted to married her, even though he was divorced. It is quite sad and unfortunate, but at least she's free from him and hopefully learned something from this.
Nope not me! My husband (He's Hmong) we catered all the foods for the guest so I CAN relax and enjoy the party with everyone!
Like he said, "the catering money is as much as we spend to go get all the stuff and labor work. Not worth it babe."
Cov vauv Dr. Thiab nyab Dr. Yeej coj li ko mas peb hmoob naj
If u like the meskas ways so much, then jus change it your life. Why bash on your hmong? We live in America now. No one is forcing anyone to do anything. If ppl still do events the hmong way, it's bc they choose to do.
If you’re old enough and can’t make your own decisions…..pab tsis tau.
this is why I am ok if my daughter decide to marry outside of their race. Happiness is everywhere.
Hmoob tsi muaj Kev kawm thiaj noj hau loj loj es mus lawb dab xwb thiaj tsi noj loj
Txawm yog zoo li no Es thaum 3 cov ntxhais txawj ntshe coob tshaj cov tub lawm ces nriav g tau cov tub hmong high education yuav ua txiv .1 ces kawg ua nkauj laug 2 ces xaiv lwm hom neeg no hmong los ua txiv ces raug tej niam tej txiv muab xab lais kicked out of the community thiab .tu siab tshaj plaws qhov 3 yug los ua hmong cov ntxhais .
I don’t care because too waste time for helping others people
One of the main reason I don't want to marry Hmong people because it's too much work.
Never let someone dictaye your life. Even if they are your parent. Parents should be supportive of their children and their happiness. Also, your dad sounds like a controlling asshole.there. I said it. Raise your daughters to have back bones. You may be educated but you still let people walk all over you. Do better for your daughters
Cov pab tha yog cov coj noj coj ua ntag es Hmoob kev noj haus thiaj liam sim tag li qhov koj hais ko
Raug kv tshaj
I'm with you in this one sister. Your ex hubby only wanted you bc of your degree. Your doctor degree means money. Money to him means he can do what he wants. I hate these idiot hmong dudes mentality with a passion. I refuse to cater to any guy. If he wants respect, he's gotta earn it. I'm not gonna wait on a man. If he wants to go out drinking, he's a grown man. He'll find his way home. It's too late to try to change this generation of men. We women HAVE to teach our sons to do better. To BE better than their fathers. I have 2 sons and 3 daughters. I treat and love them all equally. My sons grew up seeing how hmong guys aka their father is and they don't like it so they are completely different from him. Hehehe.
The culture is not to blame. It's your husband.
I'm not sure what this lady's message is all about. Is she's here to bragged about her doctor degree or bashing on the hmoob people. Too many educated people always bashing on the hmoob people this n hmoob people that, but, yet, still crawling back to the hmoob people. If our people are that bad n you're marrying outsider to get away from the hmoob people, go be their people, don't come back into the communities.
Many times, these so called educated people seem to have blinds on their eyes. For example, this lady said American parents are so loving, not like hmoob people. Come on, why did you think all these shelters and fosters homes created from? Smh.
There are bad parenting and bad people ALL across the human race.
I'm a Hmong man in my fifties now and I don't slave my wife. I love my wife dearly and I value and respect her. We have been married for thirty some years now and I still love her the same as the day I marry her. I agreed that most or some Hmong men still follow the Hmong traditional way of life and I think the real problems are the Hmong leaders. These so call Hmong leaders are not true leaders, they are losers and loaders only especially the ones that yuav niam yau, tham hluas nkauj, thiab tham2 niam mos ab.
I can see you are book smart but not really life smart. You can't blame others if you decide to go along with their idea. Also don't say hmong because that includes all and we are not all like your husband, dad, or family.
It doesn't take a doctor degree to wake up and realize that the Hmong culture and their wats are not 100% the right way. Remember Hmong men created and made and wrote those for them. rules to catered to men not support the women. It isn't for the best interest of everyone. No matter what a daughter achieved, it'll never be enough. Your degree will not buy you love or respect from your parents or your husband or in laws.
Khaws luag qub khau rau ces khee luag qub mob zoo li no ntag nawb cov mi niam tsev aw...
I don't understand why you would want to put yourself through a Hmong lifestyle man who can't even provide for his family and he expects to be treated like a king when he had been divorced already
You are smart enough to become a doctor! But not enough and listened to your parent and agreed to an arranged marriage ?
There's no correlation between the two. One is education the other is tradition and beliefs.
She was desperate due to her low self-esteem and low values from family.
Getting schooling degrees don’t fill that void
Book smart and having common sense are two different things.
Hmoob twb tuaj nyob meska lawm lo tsi kawm meska li es tsua quav beer quav cawv thiab npav noj hau loj tas li xwb thiaj tsi vam meej. Tsi rau siab mus kawm ntawv kom siab ho tsua nyiam quav beer quav cawv thiab noj loj loj xwb thiaj mus tsi txog twg li
Sim..neej.no.Leej.twg rauglubneejzoo
Your partner has to understand you, and support (& protect) you in ways that may goes against being a Hmong DIL or Hmong wife.
Moral of this story: Schooling degrees won’t fill the void of low self esteem and desire for love and value.
Her dr degree didn’t fill her void, didn’t add to herself values to not want to have face, not to want to have attention from her parents, not to want to have status of a niam tsev of someone. Therefore she married and tolerated the guy her father wanted for her because giving daddy ntsej muag, she thought was one way to earn his respect.
Tus lady koj kawm txawj xwb tsi yog kawm ntse vim yog koj tus txiv mistreated koj es koj ho los thuam koj hais hmoob as a whole, not just that koj thuam koj txiv koj nus. Why so much disrespects and anguish?
Because we r mountain hmong people.
Nashe tejzaum cov new educated generation yug tebchaw no xwb thiaj yuav pauv tau li luag haivneeg vammeej.
Don’t blame the culture. You have the choice to choose and you chose to be married to someone your dad found for you.
Yog kawg li lawm os. Txiv Hmoob ces kawg zoo li no lawm xwb.
Told to ditch these Hmong husbands and their families that still carry like this. 😂
Good luck to you sister and well done with your life. 👍👍👏👏
Dr., glad that you have let a CHEATER go and decided your worth and love yourself. You should not have married a LOSER in the first place. It was not love but a forced marriage by your OG father that still a mindset of the old days back in Laos. Not having a cheating husband and don't even listen to your father either. Live freely with your children and yourself, girl. You don't need a man or husband in your life! They are not that important. You could live without one!!
I agree. I was once married to a Hmong man, slaving throughout the week for the inlaws and weekends were spent slaving away at relatives. Now, I am with a white man and love spending my weekends doing activities and hanging out with my children and husband. To the sister that tells her story, you won't be able to change the minds of these older immigrants. I am seeing a lot of younger Hmong men adapting to the new way of life here in the US and are more respectful to their wives and our Hmong sisters are standing up for themselves. The change will come from the new generations.
Wow, wow, wow!. You called that slavery? You need to learn what slavery is then. I think you fail to understand the cultural differences between the Hmong and the White. It does not necessarily mean one group is better than the other. If you want a white guy, that's fine.l, but coming back to attack Hmong culture as a slavery is disgraceful.
@ Kiab I remember those slaving days too when I was married to my ex Hmong husband. Almost every weekend, his relatives had something going on and we always had to help out with cash where we went broke which caused a lot of arguments between us and his parents. I got tired of his family disrespecting me and my ex not defending me as his wife so I threw him in the garbage. I am now with my White American man, him and his family are so loving. No judgment, no dramas, but just full of positivities and support.
You were the scapegoat of your parents’ marital problems. That was why they blamed you for your younger siblings’ issues. Your parents failed to take responsibility as parents for their children.
Cov niag hmoob tsov tom no tos ua lino los vim hmoob lub neej tag los pluag pluag tsis muaj noj muaj haus ces niam no hmoob thiaj ua pluag tsab muaj os.
Ua cas Nej tsi sim Peb cov ntseeg Vajtswv seb Puas Txawv ma lov. Qhia rau koj paub tias cov ntseeg Vajtswv totally txawv hlo os
Koj tau tus txiv tsis nyiam txoj kev txhim kho lub neej xwb. Vim nws mus qaug quav rau kev ua si ne- tseem tshuav cov txiv neej Hmoob tsis nyiam coj li koj tus.
You asked a great question. Us cas peb cos poj niam Hmoob yuav khwv ua luav rau txiv neej Hmoob? It's all because of the time we're living in now. Let me explain. There are currently 5 generations of Hmong men in the US.
The baby boomers (the ones borned in Laos but escaped during the war) - their time is ending.
Gen X- I believe we are currently in the Gen X era. As many stories told from this channel are from this generation. These are the Hmong men currently claiming themselves as the pathans in many Hmong communities. They are the bridge between the baby boomers and the younger generations. No offense, but I'd like to call them the "confused" generation. They can't decide if they should continue the old ways of thinking or adapt to the new ways.
Millennial, Gen Z and Gen Alpha- majority of these Hmong men are born in the US. This is the group that cos laus cem cem tias ruam los yog tsis paub Hmoob kev cai dab qhuas. 😆 🤣 they are more Americanized. The old ways of thinking will die with these generations.
Blame your father for forcing you into this life. We are in America arranged marriage should not happen, there is no love.
Kj yg ib tug poj niam qia dub heev xwb os
I'm glad I'm not one of them Hmong slave woman, I'm enjoying my peace, lol
Me niam hmoob Dr aw ua ca koj yuav hais tias koj ua hauj lwm tau nyiaj ntau dua ces faib khoom vaj tsev rau koj ntau dua, niag ruam tsi muaj degree ces tau nyaij tsawg ces faib rau nws tsawg no maj!!
Well that’s why majority of hmong women now married to different nationalities!
Tus niam tsev aw....niag txiv zoo li ko tsis yuav li os....koj tsis need mloog koj txiv hais li os, mloog koj tus kheej hais xwb vim koj yog tus them koj cob nuj nqi xwb.
Plse keep your opinions to yourself 🫵🏼
We are happy to be Hmong
Xob tu siab mog me Nkauj Hmoob, Tus neeg zoo, Tus neeg ncajncees tseem muaj os mog.
Your Sister So Blessed To Have You Help Her When She’s Divorce & So Sad Your Dad Found A Man For You & You Wasn’t Ready! So Happy You Got A Degree! Wish I Could, Schools Not For Me! 😢😢😢😢😢😢
I can't believe you married that man who has no appreciation for you and your worth 💔
couldn't think for herself and she's a doctor. daddy say marry this guy. daughter - yes, daddy.
You are educated, you should made your own decision. You should let him go the first time you find out about his cheating. The best thing is not to marry him in the beginning because you didn't know each other.
Stop listening to everyone and listen to yourself.
Sister, I don't blame you. You have a selfish unloving and uneducated husband who lacks self confidence. He just wants to control you even though you stoop down to him and his life. It's time you love yourself by picking you and your degree. You sacrifice so much for it so keep it.
Trauma can sometimes make us turn to stereotypes and believe in things that may not always be true so I understand why you stay away from hmong men. If I was in your shoes I may do the same. I hope you find a really good hmong women therapist to work through this and heal. As much as I hate some of the things a lot of hmong men do I can't give up on them because then I would be giving up on my son's who I want to raise better and I do not want them to carry on or have to live with those stereotypes or that toxic legacy. I want there to be strong healthy hmong men for them to have a role models or mentors. The more we talk about these issues, the more people confront them, argue, and bicker about it the more this movement improves the constant use of alcohol and discrimination against our women. I agree that there are a lot of women out there too who suck at empowering other women which sets us back.
Mloog koj tham xwb ces koj ua tsis tau nyab hmoob....tab sis peb yog dub hau...peb plaub hau tsis daj caj tsis siab...tawv nqaij tsis dawb ne ham tsis ua nyab hmoob xwb tiag...lwm haiv neeg tu niag yuav peb ces yog tu niag neeg tsis muaj caj ces niag neeg liam es lam yuav hmoob thiab xwb....tu neeg zoo nyob muaj caj ces lawv xaiv xaiv ib yam li hmoob thiab os
It was a bad decision in choosing a man more than the Hmong culture in your situation. How could you marry a man in 4 months of talking to him? One that was not of your own choosing? You dont even know enough to see if his lifestyle matches yours? I don't like it when ppl blame bad decisions on culture. It seems to me like you need to set clear boundaries rather than completely abandon the Hmong culture/men. Good luck!!
Koj niag txiv tos tau ua yawg nrauj zaum ob los yeej coj tsis zoo
U married to the wrong Hmong husband. Not all Hmong men treat their wife likebthat
Yeah, no way a professional woman can waste her weekends wearing aprons to serve the clan. A husband who wants only a servile wife doesn't need a Dr. He just needs a kitchen maid. This guy married way out of his league, and she married way, way beneath hers. Go find someone comparable to you, Doc. Don't look back. No need to waste your brain and hand skills on kitchen utensils. You were made for greater things.
Just because you have a doctorate degree doesn't mean you are smart. When you can't think for yourself others will do it for you. Love and respect yourself and never settle for the sake of having a husband.
Yus tau Dr degree na tus txiv dev lis ntawm xwb ces au lub bye bye rau xwb los más .
Ua neej nyob tsis mauj kev hlub lawm ces tos dab tsis naws .
Txiv neej hmoob ces 100% ces zoo lis ntawm kob xwb más ua neej muaj kiag ces txiv dev tuaj kiag lawm tíag saib mus más.
Best thing for you sister is to take your doctor degree and make a life for yourself and love those who truly live you. Your children. You do not need a man to complete your life. Learn from your mistakes and make the best for yourself and your children. Your parents are your brothers concern and problems not yours. You do what you can and if you can to help. Remember the pain and mistreatment they've put you thru. Love yourself
Nothings wrong with having a man, you just have to find a good one. A married man and a women greatly benefit each other vs single persons.
She has a doctorate degree, and she's not smart at all.
Tus txiv dev g muaj qhov respect no cas yuav ua dab tsi nawb, ncaws tawm tsev xwb mas, txiv neej Hmoob lub neej dej cawv kawg plam txhua yam mob aws, mob strokes nrog
Mloog zaj neej neeg no mas meem txom ib ce. You have a Dr. Degree still do what old fashion people telling you to do. Tus no tsis tshuas ntse vob, lol
Tus viv ncaus aw kav tsij muab koj niag txiv laig cuag laig dab mus os, koj twb yog ib tug doctor es koj tsis tas need ib niag txiv dev zoo li koj tus txiv no.
Nope, nope, and nope. What dad in their right mind forces their MD daughter to marry a nobody? And what “educated” person agrees to this? Even if I’m not all that, I did not work that hard for my career to be catering to eating events on the weekends. I have lives at stake on my hands and if the in laws or community doesn’t see this and respect me as a person cuz I don’t want to go do all that work for nothing then we all don’t need each other. Every culture has good and bad in it, my thing is I’m gonna just take the good things from that culture, not everything. Hmong culture, yeah, they overindulge in the eating and drinking thing, u don’t need to invite the whole world
Zoo siab uas koj txiav txim siab tso tseg ua ntej lub neej nchuav tag nrho 100 tsav yam. Ntxov tso ces ntxov kajsiab xwb.
Hmoob lub neej ces ruam li no thiab ntshe yeej yuav cov li no kom txog hnub tsis muaj cov thawj coj nyob hauv lub ntiaj teb no mas ntshe thiaj li yuav tsis muaj tej teeb meem no lawm xwb. Vim Hmoob cov thawj coj yog cov muab dej cawv saib hlob thiab Hmoob cov niaj coj noj coj ua no los yeej yeem, yeem ua tej dej num no ces pab tsis tau. Ib co niam tsev es lawv cov txiv tau ua tus coj los yog tau ua Paj tha es cov niam Paj tha mas tseem cas saib tsis taus cov niam tsev tsis muaj meej mom thiab no mas yeej tsis yog tim cov txiv neej tas, tas li nawb! Hmoob ces yim vam meej ces yim muaj plus xwb os.
Tus viv aw!! Yus hlub yus tus kheej yuav zoo dua qhov koj mob siab rau nws zoo tsis muaj nqi dab tsis es ua li ua koj ua yog lawm os mog.
Kev noj ntawm mhoob yeej tsis txawj coj tiag2. Koj hais yog lawm me niam laug.
I blame your parents! They should have supported you all the way from the very beginning both emotionally and physically. They should have been your backbone and love you no matter what. You are their child but yet they verbally abused you. I am so sorry to hear all the hardships that you had to endured. You deserved so much more. From now on, live life to how you want it. Pursuit your own happiness. Thank you so much for sharing your life story. It takes a lot of confident to give your story away like this. You got it sis. Do it for yourself. If anything you need to love yourself more.
Txiv hmoob yuav tau niam yau tiam 21 no poj niam yuav tau txiv yau lawm thiab
You are 💯 right... have you tried it yet?
😅😅 no but I believe the 21st century most womens are independent and educated and make more money than mens. I am sure some women are stay out of men and be single.
Gotta stop with the blaming "hmong".. its the man or its the family. Oh and its you
she's playing the victim role since she couldn't think for herself. she got no brain for a doctor.
Agreed!
Sister not all Hmoob men are like you husband and father sorry you got a bad apple I know our tree have lots of bad one but we do have lots of good one too
Other people have bad one too so be careful when you choose your next man black white or brown
Zoo kawg
You have the right decision,
Hmoob ruam, tsiaj hav zoov !
I feel sorry to all hmoob women- slaves for life😢! I agreed with you on we women slaves and over cooked and wasted so much food. Some husbands still go cheat on the wives.
Glad you let go of your hubby. No one can help you until you help yourself first.
Doctor degree woohoo proud of you sister💖!
😂
U hate to be born hmong
Speak for yourself, I'm a proud and educated Hmong woman married to a traditional Hmong man who works just as hard as I do for our household and at any event. He doesn't ask of me more than what he himself cannot do and does more than I do half the time. I'm not saying this to brag, but I'm so tire of everyone lumping Hmong or even for this matter Traditional Hmong as a whole because their life is crappy.
Niam lau a thov kj pab hai ib txoj rau kv thiab puq tau o
You are 100% right about Hmong women and gatherings. T_T
Its true 😩 last summer all my summer was spent every weekend at the distant inlaw side doing parties. As much as three parties in one day. My mil and husband says we have to do it so they will support us back but when our hu plig for our wedding, ua neeb for me, and hu plig for our baby no one even showed up. It was so sad.
Educated person and an uneducated person never have the same mindset. It’s hard to compromise. Your father’s mind is also a 1975 mindset…follow your heart not your parents. Our Christian Hmong family moves away from the Hmong traditional family in a big way. We only celebrate important holidays and events. Men, women, and children have the same rights to eat at the same time and share the same table. I’m so glad that I’m a Christian man. I’ll never put my wife through the Hmong traditional way. Wish u luck…!
I know some Christians Hmong families that are like this or way worse. It depends. 😆
@@KingOfThePirates101 yes…it depends on the domination.
@@KingOfThePirates101 good thing we don’t worship man but Jesus.
People can change. It’s not the education but their foundation/view on life.
@@kaoxiong6148 Are you dominate or submissive in bed?
You married the wrong person. You should be married to the same level person as you are.
Agreed!
ถูกต้องที่สุด ชอบมากค่ะ ขอบคุณเจ้าของเรื่องที่นำมาเผยแพร่ค่ะ
You're an educated woman but not that smart. Didn't you guys talk about what you want in your marriage b4 you got married. What you expect from him and vice versa 🤦♀️ I really don't think it's hmong men..lol. I think it's just your husband. I'm married to a hmong man and he definitely does not treat me that way. He is not the type to go eating and drinking all weekend long. He doesn't expect me to go help out unless I want to or have the time. He comes home, cooks clean and takes care of the kids when i am unable too. Yes, I'm educated and my husband is not.
Many Hmong men have moved away from the traditional lifestyle, but it's unfortunate that some still practice in United States.
I'm so glad my husband doesn't care about eating out at relatives during gatherings. Or big on cooking alot for gatherings/celebration. I'm so sick and tired of it. My weekends are suppose to be about me resting and time for myself to enjoy. Not slaving for self called relatives that I don't even know.
Well, from a Dr., it's disappointing. But, keep in mind the relationship discipline is itself just as in-depth as a medical's. Fall short below margin, and you're in trouble.
Many people don't see this, but this is what power abuse can do. It can choke the living life out of normalcy. Don't use power other than to serve morals of humanity(or Hmong morals if integrateable up).