i have always been extremely introverted and down and i really hope i can see a therapist one day to know if i am going through depression since i dont wanna self diagnose, but i never told my parents how ive been feeling all the time and this one time i had a really bad breakdown that they witnessed, but they dismissed everything as puberty and asked me to go to sleep! i even tried to tell them that ive been suffering and i struggled with this bc i never told anyone, and i probably would never try again. i started going through this at 9 and i still am not sure what's causing it now. but i know for sure i can't say i love my family, especially since being caned as punishment since a young age. i reject affection a lot now bc of this, like even hugging them makes me uncomfy, sometimes i feel i hate them, and hate is a strong word. the omly people i can really talk to and seek advice from is my friend, who is going thru hard times too, and my online friends.
Most of the parents are doing this mistake. You should not tell your children "i have suffered more" or "its not a big deal compared to the things that i have gone through" etc.. when they say its hard for them,they are saying this to you because they have to share their emotions. They trust you. They want you to understand them. That's all they want. When you say "its not a big deal" they will stop sharing their emotions and will bottle them up. Its not good for them. Why can't you just say comfortable things to them.atleast just let them know that you appreciate them.
that's what happened to me and I once attempted suicide you i said what the teenager said and you know till this day i sufferer from anxiety and depression you are right you shouldn't say that to your child.
Seriously, a few years ago I opened up to my mom about my struggles and she talked about how she came to the US empty handed so she could raise me and my siblings here and we could have an "easier" life than one in her country. Which I UNDERSTAND but I wish she could say more than "I don't understand why you're so stressed when life is so easy here and you have so many school/work opportunities". I don't talk to her about this kind of stuff anymore lmao
It’s about nipping the issue at the roots before it becomes extreme. If a parent went through the same thing, they’d want to help their kid especially if the parent didn’t have access to mental healthcare like that back then.
honestly, i have never seen someone as selfless as the daughter. she is always prioritising her family before self, which is something we rarely see in our society. it is sad at the same time though, with her brother and all, but i think the least that her parents can do is to acknowledge her efforts or appreciate her for what she is doing? and not venting their anger on her. she is tired too, as much as them. a word of encouragement does not hurt anyone.
@@leefelixsegg2666 That must be harsh. Keep on living pls, one day you'll get the life you deserve. ♡ I know words won't do much but I really wish you the best.
That was me.....I literally cried watching this. I have a sister who is 12 years younger than me and it felt like HELL. I seriously thought of committing suicide so many times because I was so stressed out. I hated it when people called me the "작은 엄마 (little mom)." I was so disappointed in my parents because i thought that I didn't have a say in having another sibling who is that young. I knew what was ahead of me. and because my brother who is two years younger, the oldest male in my paternal side and him being the only son; also the fact that he doesn't know how to properly take care of his own self, they baby him and they don't rely on him because he is very clumsy like a 3rd grader. I knew with my dad being a traditional Korean, HE WOULD NOT HELP MY MOM OR TAKE CARE OF HIS YOUNGEST CHILD; despite the fact that my sister was his third kid (THAT'S PRETTY SAD). It's so sad to see this girl go through the same thing.. I wish that she gets the best out of life once her little sibling is a little older. Once they're 6 years old, it's not that bad.
@@윤민경-n8i I am from India. I burst into tears after watching the daughter. Such a mature, considerate, lovely, responsible kid. It must be really really hard for you with the traditional environment (house chores and looking after baby belongs to women) during those days. Wish you both very very heart warming, gifted happy life.
I actually feel like this girl is like me.... I want to tell her : hey your not alone, I'm the same as you so let's cheers eatch other Sorry for my bad english
"Her dream is to have a stable job" Same girl, same. But seriously, she's very considerate, kind and understanding at such a young age. She deserves to be helped and vent out her anger without people getting angry at heritage
Rewatching this program after 5 years I got a Dejavu about one of my close friend.She's not come from wealthy family, but she's one of top students in her section at school and got best marks for enter an university. But that's the time her youngest brother was born, when she was 20. So she had to forget about her dreams and get a job. Now she's a employee working hard to support her family to raise her brother while we, her other friends living our best life. It's been 2 years and she still regret about her life💔 we feel so sorry for her even though we have no lot of options than facing to it with her.
Mom: "don't burden yourself" Also mom when her daughter said she's having a hard time: "i'm in pain too. It'S NoT ONly yOu thAT iS suFfeRing. StOp whiNiNg and GeT baCk To wORk!"
honestly I hate it when people say that their pain was worse or they've had more and/or worse hardships. When parents do that... I hate it the most. It's like "Mom I'm having a hard time" and instead of comforting or whatever the child needs... "Oh, yOu ThInK yOuR lIfE iS tOuGh? I had to *insert something that would make others feel bad*" Doing that would either make it feel like the child can't rely on their parent or the child would want to help out with their parents' problems and pretend as if nothing is bothering them.
Couldnt agree more to what you said. I hate it when they invalidate other people's sufferings just because they think they're having a hard time more than the others.
Older generations are so dismissive of younger people's feelings. Your kids are not saying they have it worse than you did, they just want you to listen. That's all it takes most of the time to make a person feel better, to be listened to. People being forced to suppress their feelings is why we have a huge suicide problem worldwide. JUST LISTEN TO YOUR CHILDREN, PARENTS! IT'S NOT A DIFFICULT THING TO DO!
Ikr. As well as, why do we need to suffer when we didn’t even do anything wrong! Parents! Why are all of you sooo STUPID! We’re telling we’re tired and you’re saying taht your life is tougher because of us! So what!? You were the one who decided to make us!!! You see those people with family havinga hard time and then you will make us and then when we complain and say that it’s your fault because you made us .. you are going to say if I only knew that you would be like this! Da heck! For real!this is not some kind of fairy tale where your daughter or son would be different from others and when you will have a family it would be like you imagined !! Duhhhhhhh my gad wake up.. why are we the kids smarter than you idiots!
Can we talk about the fact that they really glossed over the part about her suicidal thoughts. That's not just a mild case of depression. She seems like a pretty realistic girl, so I doubt that was exaggeration which means she really needs to get some help. Her dad occasionally forcing himself to tell her he loves her isn't going to help. It's just going to make her feel even more obligated to help her parents out. The mindset of, "my parents are going out of their way now to make me feel better, I should stop whining and help more." isn't going to help her at all, because that isn't the case. Her parents are doing the bare minimum to help her emotionally, and them suddenly going up a level still isn't enough. But it'll seem like such a dramatic shift to her that she'll think she doesn't have the right to complain anymore. She clearly has no support system at home, and that doesn't look like it'll change any time soon. By making her feel obligated to help out, she's going to put off her own health in consideration of others. And when you have suicidal thoughts, and are crying yourself to sleep at night, it's just all going to go downhill. I really doubt it, but I hope her parents had a wake up call and actually try to get her some help. Unfortunately, South Korea has such a dismal view of mental illness (as shown here by their disregard of her suicidal statements, and the fact that they thought her being thanked would be enough to stop these emotions) that I doubt they'll seek professional help, and will most likely end up telling her to suck it up. Just like when the dad decided his daughter's feelings didn't matter because he had a harder childhood. That's not how emotions work, and just because you deem someone else to have suffered more, doesn't make your suffering any less. You haven't experienced their suffering, so your level of bad may not be horrible compared to them, but to you, it is the worst you have felt. And that is something that shouldn't be ignored or compared. The same way parents tell kids that a failed test, or a mental breakdown over school isn't the end of the world. Parents know that because they now have some perspective of other things in life that are worse. However, kids don't have this perspective. And what they experience today is the worst they have ever felt, because they are only part way through their lives. If a person hasn't experienced worse, then their experience now is classed as the worst until another experience occurs where they can go, "oh, this is worse than that". This a personal thing, and not something we can compare between people.
My father's reactions towards me and comments are similar but I was lucky to have a compassionate mom. My dad says things like he had to take care of his alcoholic dad growing up or he lost his mom young or his first wife died as an excuse to make me feel guilty for not being always happy. If I cry he shouts at me, if I have a panic attack he tells me that I'm not able for the world and should be locked in a tower like Rapunzel. He has insinuated that I'm a whore because he found a condom in my room and told me my boyfriend of a year at the time only wants me for sex and I was 20. He made me guilty for being human and I feel like people need to take this seriously. I know I went on a tangent but I really felt for the girl because of my experience. She needs therapy and she needs love and care. I hate when people downplay the suffering of others and don't let them feel how they are feeling. It doesn't matter if people experienced worse your feelings are always valid. I have a lot of anxiety and I was at one point depressed. The thing is when your parents treat you like that it follows you. You let friends and partners treat you that way until you realize you deserve more.
I totally wish more people have that viewpoint about hardship and pain and that it is relative to your own experiences and you can't compare what it's like for different people. I was exactly the same as her when I was young. I used to cry myself to sleep and thought about suicide almost every night and it felt like I was just in a black hole that I didn't know how to get out of. On top of that my parents didn't believe in psychologists and thought it was a waste of money. I told my dad I was depressed and he just told me that this is what real life is like and that I just had to deal with it and it's not all blue skies and sunshine. I used to wanna killed myself just out of spite so they'd find me dead and feel guilty. That was 15 years ago though but even now I still struggle a bit despite having a career and a life as an adult....just seems really easy to just lay down and never get up again some days.
As a Korean myself, I 100% agree and it really saddens me that such serious topics are glossed over. I am like the 5% (I’m guesstimating I have no idea but it’s not a large percent) of Koreans that actually talk about mental health and such with people and try to help my other Korean friends open up about their issues. I feel like the show shouldn’t have made it seem like not a big deal because it’s a problem to ignore mental health. But at the same time, I’m glad they didn’t give her any bad advice since they aren’t professionals. And it did seem like some of them did care, like Sunmi for example, who brought it up and seemed concerned (although again it was brushed off). The audience too were crying and such. The cast seemed like they wanted to cheer her up but didn’t approach it correctly because they didn’t really know HOW to...
I’ve heard that koreans tend to downplay mental disorders such as depression or anxiety, but i only started to believe it now, after i saw this video. I can’t believe that they’re not bringing up about the daughter’s suicidal thoughts and depression; instead they ask unimportant things such as having the middle brother lie beside the baby. She said that she thought of ending her life. And nobody even brought that up. Heck, some of the guests even said that it wasn’t a concern. As someone who’s not quite depressed but has low self esteem, second guesses herself, worries a lot, and think that she’s not good enough, i can say that praises aren’t going to lift my spirits up enough that i erase all negativity from my life-it’s my point of view, at least. Because deep down, even if i were to be lathered in praises and compliments, i would doubt the sincerity of the praises-the feeling of not being good enough comes from within the self, further reinforced by external impacts, such as, in this case, the parents telling her that what she’s going through wasn’t as tough as what they went through. Of course while this is true for me, the daughter might get all better just by expressions of love and gratefulness. However the panel really needs to emphasise more on the fact that she contemplated suicide-to me that’s a red flag and she needs professional help. Another thing is that pain on her knee. 16 year olds shouldn’t be feeling pain that old women would. The description of the pain is like hammering so i imagine that it’s quite severe, so if i were her i’d go to the doctor and check if anything’s wrong with her bone. Who knows if it might have been a problem with the development of the bone or maybe a problem with her nerves.
Not all of them, but there is a stigma in society because they're still conservative in general. Of course, new generations are more open minded and it will eventually change. Everything is a process.
dude i ''only'' have seasonal depressive episodes who mostly moderate, when i had a breakdown last year from literally nothing, i thought i was going crazy. i had no strength left in me and ended up being sedated, but even then i never thought of ending my life. CANNOT imagine what this child must feel. all throughout this video i thought please get this girl mental help asap, they need to realize that shes actually sick... her pain must be beyond horrendous. i hope that shell get better. they walking on thin ice and downplay tf outta it...damn...
lmao and she also does cheerleading on the side like o.O it's no wonder why her knee messed up (im afraid she might resent the baby when she's older tho. I mean she's has a really good heart and all but she's human too and she might do random outbursts of anger that she didn't mean to do or say.)
The way she bobs up and down while carrying her brother looks really hard on the knee. She puts her whole weight on one knee to bob up and down, so one knee is taking all her weight plus baby's, for hours a day.
I HATE it every time I say “I’m having a really hard time, I’m tired, can’t do this, too much stress” and my parents, mostly my mom, would be like “why? You think *you’re* stressed? I have to take care of you three blah blah blah” which is just like wth. Teens get stressed too from too much homework, studying too much, and having other things to do out of school that makes us worry about two things, school and non-school related things. Parents, and adults in general, should stop saying that us teens don’t know what stress is or “you think you’re having a hard time? I’m having an even worse time than you” like do they not get that it’ll make it harder for us who are having a hard time? I’m no expert but I think it can lead to serious depression because it’ll make some of us think that our parents don’t care how we feel.
i actually used to have depression and managed to get out of it, when i still have depression, i wouldn't tepl anybody, because i know their reactions will be like that. (Ex : you think im not tired?)
Kookie Monstar yea exactly like we are not adults so our stresses are different from theirs . they can’t expect young people to have the same things to stress about.
just another music lover it’s because they are down playing that such a young person could have something to stress about. I hate that too. Our generation is so different from our parents. They could never understand us fully of our day to day struggles living. We will never experience what our parents went through because we weren’t born in their generation and they can never experience what we are going through because they weren’t born in our generation. It’s sad but you need to talk to your parents about not assuming what life experiences should and shouldn’t be considered stressful in your life. Say that you understand to being humble and thankful but that you want them to understand that you too have struggles and until you realize to overcome them that you need their support to get through it by acknowledging that it is a struggle for you and that you can easily overcome it if you get their support and acknowledge of the struggle. If not then your relationship will get worse with them if you can’t trust them to help deal with something that they deem small. If they think it’s nothing then it’s like saying your worth is nothing. I know this was a long post but i had this struggle with my parents not acknowledging my stresses, and until I fully talked to them about how it makes me feel when they ignored it, it made my parents realize that all I need is for them to be there for me and I will eventually get over it. If they hadn’t acknowledged my stresses I know I wouldn’t have overcome them. So really talk to your parents about it and you can use my post for notes on what to say to them because now I have parents who understand!
Exactly, our young age doesn't mean we don't feel pain. Just because we're young doesn't mean we're happy. It seems like adults don't understand that. They were happy at our age, but we're sad at this age. Our generation is just so broken.
I'm the 4th but my little brother and I have an age difference and I had to baby sit my little brother. Since all of my siblings are old I had to babysit
I’m the youngest after my baby brother, but I still didn’t have a proper childhood, coz my mom made me do chores since I was 8 and my brother was born when I was 10 so I still have a hard time
Rebecca Tang I’m have one older sibling but it’s safe to say that I didn’t have a childhood and at this point I’ve made it my goal to get away from this household because I know that’s the one thing that’s gonna heal me. Endurance.
The fact that whenever she tells her parents that she is going through a rough time and they would reply that they are having a rougher time is what all of us have experienced and what made us decide not to tell them our problems because we think we would be a burden to them.
True .. It also got to the point of questioning ourselves like "Why did i even get born in this world?" and all negative thinking just flooded your mind when that happens .. Still you smile even when your hurting deep inside ..
It would have been nice if her parents had complimented her and apologized to her. I don't understand why parents can never apologize. The daughter is trying her to best to help out in a difficult situation she didn't create. The parents are responsible for how many children they have and how they manage the household. It sounds like they never said thank you, didn't listen to her, and ignored her concerns. I think the mom was trying to make amends but she needs to do more (both parents do). But there is no solution. The mom didn't promise to ask the middle son to help more, dad didn't agree to help more. I'm worried for the daughter--she has depression and her reality doesn't seem like it will change. She's a lovely person.
Yeah, I hope things get better, but it was left a little vague. And, I do wish the parents had practiced birth control protected sex =/ the mom had her first child after 40 and her second six years later... idk it didn't seem planned and I feel like they should have been more responsible and thought ahead =( a lot of their current burden could have been prevented, like the mom's health, financial burden, and daughter's severe depression =(
Father, did you see how your daughter reacted when you enumerated all the things you did when you were young? You saw how disappointed see is? She is suffering of depression, something she's fighting up all inside her. She needs support from inside and she needs all the support she can get.
please dont blame the father or mother ,when you become parent you would understand, harsh thhigs can be blessing.the sad part is tthat the dad was also sufering
@@nchumnhumt everyone is suffering in life, it's stupid, ignorant, and immature to say harsh things to a child over it. You survived the trauma you went through, so why wont you try to make your child have a childhood, instead of making them a parent at the age of 10-15 just because you and your partner is too incompetent to communicate. Take responsibilities or give her up, people who pushes their responsibilities onto their children are hopeless.
The dad downplays the daughter's hardships. The mom uses guilt and victimization to trap the daughter. The mom is weak and all that but why does she have to yell at the daughter about showing her emotions on her face? If the daughter cant show her emotions at home freely..where else will she be able to do it? If she cant talk to her family about hoe hard life is...who else will gice her advice on how to navigate these hardships based on their experiences? You cant say "this is easier than working 9-5" or "this is nothing compared to working in a field" when the daughter has no frame of reference....makes me angry....
my life is just like this girl's; my household is almost the same--I'm the oldest of 4 girls. my parents do the same, and it's resulted in me bottling up everything. I use art as a stress-reliever now, but it kinda sucks because I'm a junior in high school and my stress/anxiety/low self-esteem is at its peaks. I'm a passive girl as well, so it's very difficult for me to talk in general. my parents can get hypocritical too; wanting me to talk but when I do they say I'm talking back and have no respect. it's sad to say that I've just gotten used to it now
I'm an only child, and when I break down in front of my parents or I scream at them because I really felt a whirlwind of emotions and I don't know how to manage them (it's really overwhelming), they get mad and make me stop whining bc the neighbors might hear it- I really got mad when my mom mentioned that bc I think she's too ashamed of me whining like a kid but I have no choice; I have no other way to show it :(
I can relate to the daughter. It's actually the first time I'm crying while watching Hello Counselor. I'm the oldest daughter in my family as well, and I have three younger brother. It can really tough at times, but I can't share with anyone, because my parents expect me to be mature enough to not 'whine'. I just bottle it up inside that it's suffocating at times. And as the oldest, parents whining something in front of you isn't something new. My family going through financial crisis for several years now, and it's just so frustrating to see my parents didn't talk to each other or when my mom always whine to me about my father or anything he did. I'm growing up with all that, without any personal space to cry (I don't have my own bedroom, I share it with my aunt who living with my family) or anyone to talk to. If I want to talk about these things to my friend, I just thought that it wouldn't be appropriate or they would just brush it off like it's nothing.
Thank you for saying this. I'm a therapist. This beautiful girl needs someone to talk to, to validate her feelings, to not judge, to understand and empathize and help her see that SHE MATTERS and is a blessing to others, even if her mom doesn't recognize it. Thats why I wish this show would have a professional on the panel when discussing serious issues like this. Its fine to have them give advice but that's no enough.
edit : i just wanna say thank you for your kind words and advices, also if you're facing the same problem as mine, stay strong and keep your head up. i love you and we will fight this together ❤️ i have taken depression tests many times , and the results always shows that i'm depressed , even my counselor at school once called my mother to seek for professional help . but my mother never acknowledge it , instead she would say things like , i'm being weak , and she had worse when she was my age . it got me thinking that i got no one to talk to . whenever i tried to talk to my close friends , i thought that i'm a trouble for them . i tried commit suicide for 2 times now and i failed . now i can't wait to study abroad and leave my family , because i know that's what they want .
Girl I love u. If I there I would help u. I also suffer in depression not only me all the human being are suffering like this. Parents sometimes dont understand the point. I understand u bcs I know it
I relate to you so much. I have depression too and my mom say things like "I am being dramatic" "you don't know what I went through". Sometimes its just too hard for me. I have made the same plan as you, to study abroad and finally free myself from here where there's no freedom. I hope you all the best! and we may not know each other but you can always talk to me if you want:) I like being friends with everyone!
My parents: "Do this/that." Me: "I'm tired/ it's to hard. Can I do it later?" My parents: " In our old days, when we were your age we worked twice as hard but we never complained. So why are you complaining?" Me: "Nevermind, i'll do it.." But, honestly I was actually tired and do I want to start a whole argument on this topic? No. Just because I'm a girl or I'm smiling doesn't mean it's hard on me too. I have school and that is already stressful enough, but I wouldn't complain because I understood my parents also had their struggles. But, when I would get home, I had to do my chores and take care of my younger sibling. Along with that I had school work. Sometimes I would even have to stay up to finish my assignment(s). People might think school is easy but, as you're getting into other grades it becomes hard. We get more classes then usual so we work twice as hard too. It gets serious. I just wanted to point this out because parents sometimes don't get "school" is hard too and expect us to handle extra hard work. But, to anyone who is struggling on this same problem. Stay strong! Fighting!
She truly is the gem of her family. So selfless. Hope she finds what she really wanted in the future, something that can make her genuinely happy. Something for herself.
AGREE =( I don't understand how ppl can just have a child all loosey goosey. It's one of the biggest decisions you'll ever make in your life. Think it through for a minute😒
Finally someone who cut the mother some slack...everybody's mad at her & so am i , but like...atleast she cared enough to contact the show so they can sit down & figure this out.
@@laayeshzeyneb8853 Yes, the fact that the mother tried to connect to her on a more emotional level and stepped in, is praiseworthy. Its not an easy move to give in and be a good listener, let alone deciding to be on national TV and talk about your household problem. Even to admit your mistakes to your children is hard, like how many of parents really notice or admit that. Most if not all of the time parents are confident that they are always right no matter what. Its easier said than done and I've noticed that some of the people here only know how to complaint etc every single time without trying to understand everyone's involved perspective.
"The pain behind her smile" a normal title for kids concern or problem, this is a normal things for kids these days, I got a lot of friends who diagnoses with depression, ngl but even myself diagnoses with depression✌️❤️, pls help kids these days 😭💔✨
When she started describing her depression and suicidal thoughts I felt for her. I know what that feels like and to have parents that say "I've had it worse". In my case, it wasn't until I was officially diagnosed with depression, anxiety, and OCD that my parents changed. I sincerely hope that she talks to a professional and leads a long healthy life where she is happy.
the guy who said it's not a concern would probably do the same thing to his children and when he finds out they have depression he'd probably call them selfish or something like does he not realize she literally said she wanted to kill herself? That alone makes it automatically a concern
I honestly can’t believe him. Does he realize how big of an issue this is? She said that she wants to KILL herself. This is definitely a problem and she should get professional help immediately. I honestly don’t know what was going on through some of those people’s heads while they said it wasn’t a problem. Ignorance. It’s disturbing. That poor girl. I hope she gets better..
poodle noodle probably because he’s a kpop member and they’re scared that his fans will attack the show by questioning him honestly that was so small minded of him
I know this is realllyyyyy late but, depression isn’t just a genetic thing. Yes people who have a family history of depression or any other illness are more likely but you can develop it from trauma, or any specific event, your diet, things in your life, etc. It isn’t just a genetic thing, you can develop it overtime.
@@safa-pf3wj what she meant was depression can sprout from families putting you down. when your parents compares you to other kids who do better or lowering your self esteem until you crumble.
When she immediately picks up her brother, it stopped crying. The baby automatically knew her scent. In that scenario alone, anyone can tell that she really do spend more time and endearment towards him. I love her. She's one of a kind.
I also babysit my younger sister and my dad also told me “she seems to hate you, she doesnt want to be with you” and them my mom would also said “why are you acting like that?why do u look so upset??!” smth like that so when i was eleven i began to change i’ve been so cold and now that i’m 13 i’ve been having the same problem as hers i often thought of suicide but then i wondered if theyre gonna even cry.I’ve never told them abt this and i just decided to cry to sleep everynight,my dad would even open my door to see if i was sleeping at 1 am but i always sleep around 3 am just to cry and then in the morning when my eyes are so puffy my mom would say “seems like you’ve slept well too much” they could see the change towards my behaviour but they look at how they trait me.I’ve been doing well at school i even rank 1st but them my mom would boast abt it at social media that i ranked 1st, but she never told me in person that she is proud of me. It’s really hard for me.
Hey, I know you wrote this a time ago, but I wanted to tell you this. I wholeheartedly understand you, and I've lived something similar (that part where your mother talks about your good things to other people but never says anything to you really resonated with me). I know right now it seems hopeless, and I'm so sorry you are suffering this much. I just wanted to say that things will get better, I spent my childhood and teenager years feeling like you but now at 24 I'm far from those thoughts. Even if it's hard, keep trying and reach for help (if you feel you don't have anyone, talk to your teachers or look up resources online). If you really really feel like you're alone, please tell me and I'll be here for you. Good luck and be brave, you deserve love and happiness and you will reach them if you hold on a bit more.
When I'm ranked 1 in class and we get our papers my mom would say well done but then say but ih look ur friends handwriting is so pretty but urs looks some one who is drunk This simple comments can make some one life feel worth less. I work hard so that she has something in me to be proud of but its always nit good enough. Everyone else says I'm great but what about her, what do I need to do to make her proud
Working hard in school and doing too much household choirs and less sleep.. that's also the start of depression, plus your parents dont appreciate things that you do.. it's so heavy it hurts like hell.. then you feel numb eventually and you just want to end all of it.. im tired too.. too tired.
I agree christine. I think that staying indoors and not getting enough fresh air and sunlight can also cause depression. She said she also has knee problems and is in pretty severe pain. That can cause depression as well I think.
I know it's kinda late to respond since this episode has been aired two months ago but it's not a concern to me cuz I did all kind of house chores, babysitting and school works like non-stop cuz I love my ma and I know one day all these good deeds will be paid off soon enough back to me...I have survived a terrible family issues but still I managed to get a hold on something and be stronger each day...I suffered from back pain and swollen feet and I'll just tell myself that I'M A STRONG WOMAN!
My parents : *dear, can you go to the store to buy some milk?* Me after doing the chores of the household : *I'm really tired and I can't feel my legs now.* Them: *did you know how we went to work. We used to walk for 1hour and then jumped over the himalayas then swam the Atlantic ocean then walked to Sahara desert then we arrived to our work.* Me: *in which country was your was your office?Australia?* Credits to : preciousjeon
YES THE ADMIRATION IN HIS EYES WERE SO EVIDENT BUT TBH IF I WAS THERE, I would’ve looked at her the same way that he did. That girl is just so nice and kind and selfless i love her
It’s sad how almost every parent has switch the conversation to their life being more harder yet they don’t understand why there son/daughter doesn’t open up about anything :/
As soon as i saw the girls face, i saw the loneliness in her eyes though she is smiling. Poor girl! Me too, i am a lonely type of person. Sometimes i thought of giving up on my life with i don't know what my reason is. I just feel too exhausted and sad. But i find kpop and kdrama that i got to hold on to it and temporarily forget my loneliness.
I'm happy to read that! You should check out SUJU...plug from ELF. They literally add sunshine to my life. One of the members also suffers from depression, and he is pretty open in discussing his struggles. I know they are just celebrities, but I love them.
I love suju too. I admire leeteuk very much. From all the difficulties and struggles he faced in his life, he continues to smile and be his best for his fans.
same here. when i saw the girl's face, i can see my old self when i was struggle with depression. i was lightly smiling but still looking so lonely and empty. her face also looks so pale
I was really shocked when she started describing her depression. It seemed as if she was describing me. Well, i guess i found out that i have depression. Which is no surprise at all. My mum and dad fight 24/7, school stresses the shit out of me and i have no real good friends and i feel lonely and have suicidal thoughts. When i showed my brother a story i wrote he just said : omg that's so emo. Nothing else. They never see or feel how i feel. I always try to keep a straight face and not cry in front of them. When i do, i feel like im a weak person. Whenever i see good friends im kind of jealous and envious of them. But sometimes when they badmouth each other i wonder if there really can be a REAL friendship. Im just dissapointed in whole humanity, because it is costing me my sanity. -n.m
@@dietgardenkittenmiau1996 well...they are all fake. I've seen it so many times. They act nice in front of each other and when the other leaves, the other one starts saying bs.
You sound a lot like me. Sometimes I wished time would stand still so I could breathe. No one understood me. No one took my emotions seriously. Like you, I had friends but I learned early not to rely on them. I had no one but me. My parents had their own issues and stresses. They forgot I was a kid. I didn't know what being an adult was but I was forced to behave like one. My brother and sister had no idea what I was going through. Whenever they did something wrong, I got the punishment. I grew up sad, lonely and angry. After years of trying to figure out why I was so unhappy, a doctor asked me if I was depressed. I was shocked. Depression never occurred to me. Finding that out was the first step to my recovery. The second step was finding the right people to talk to. I feel so much better now and I know you can too. Please find someone to talk to. Don't give up. Find your happiness.
Sorry to hear that. People generally won't ever get to feel what depression feels like, so they're not able to even relate. Either that, or they're so consumed and occupied by their own demons to even be present. Good friends will laugh when you fall, while holding out a hand to lift you up. Good friends don't badmouth each other. Good friends support each other through thick and thin. Your friends sound toxic tbh, I wouldn't touch them with a 10ft pole.
@@janerm3940 exactly they're occupied about their own things. You only can find who a good person is when you're stressing, but they try to calm you down and just say crap it to their business and pay full attention. A "friend" of mine says : talk to me about stuff. But when i do, she doesnt even pay attention and just says : mhm, yeah, i see. And looks around.
I really hate it when others compare their own pain with someone and not minding the words they say. It doesn't really matter who suffered the most because in the end, pain is still pain. Even just a simple word like "idiot" etc. can cause pain to someone, thinking that it was just an another "common" or "clićhe" word which is usually use for today's society. But you don't know that it might have affected that person's life and choices in a way. So yeah, still hoping that Hello Counselor cast experts to the program because mental illness (psychological problems) is much deeper than they think, it's not like your typical abcd's.
"I have health problems from my second pregnancy and Im also traumatized about my husband getting sick while my little girl is more of a mother than a sister to her brother... I WILL HAVE ANOTHER BABY"
My mom would yell at me for doing a small mistake. For example I drop a bottle cap and she either yells or sighs at me. I'm 14 and this has been a problem ever since I was 10. I'm too scared to speak, because I think I will get yelled at. One time on july 4th my parents were inside while my older brother(19) was outside with me and our cousins watching fireworks. My aunt asked me if I wanted to do sparks, so I walked over to do sparks. The thing is... I thought my older brother was watching my younger brother so I did the sparks. My younger brother was in the back of the truck and he fell. My aunt rushed to him and took him inside. I went to check on him and the first thing that happened to me was that I get yelled at. I tried to speak up by saying "I thought (Older brother) was watching him." But my mom said That I was suppose to watch him.. She called me Useless. I was only 12 at the time. My eyes began to fill with tears and I ran to the guest room and cried. The word useless ran through my head and made me cry even more. That word useless made me think I AM useless. I think that I can never do things right even if i make a mistake. I remember what happened so clearly. I believe I am a useless worthless child. My dad called me worthless and I also cried. Most days I would cry in the middle of the night remembering the events that happened. I have had social anxiety ever since I was 9 and it got worse as I grew up. I don't even think I have Self Esteem and confidence. Its all rough for me a 14 year old being told Useless and worthless. Those two words stuck to me like glue. When I am happy I get scared and believe that I don't deserve happiness because I'm a worthless person. I am positive I have Sleeping problems because I always sleep at 2 to 5 in the morning. Sometimes I think that i don't deserve to live because I'm a headache to my parents. I would play in my head what I would do If i were to ever kill myself... I try telling my parents about my social anxiety but they don't care. They think its like a cold, it will go away. I wish people understood me. My parents don't understand me.
i relate to this a lot. i hope you are able to get help soon and that you wont have to feel this way anymore soon because this is definitely a big concern. i might not know you, but im here for you :)
I experience that from time to time but only when my parents are frustrated beforehand so I don't know how you feel with being called "useless and worthless" like almost everytime, but I have a friend who has anxiety. Her parents are like yours but she still builds up confidence every now and then to forget about what her parents have said to her. Things like this doesn't need to be gone through by yourself sweetie, sometimes people go through this with others who feel the same or those who understand. If you feel you don't have anyone, you can talk to me or people online (don't tell them where u live tho or any other specific details that can make them find you and DON'T SEND NUDES IF THEY ASK EVEN IF THEY'RE NICE CUZ PEDOS BE EVERYWHERE. IF THEY THREATEN YOU, U MF TELL ME AND ILL WHOOP THEIR ASS and that's on periodt pooh). 😌✌️
I think almost every child can relate to his. Especially my sister always told me that if i keep yelling at her, i would not succeed in life nor have friends and sometimes i would cry thinking about it. I yelled at her for a reason. There is one, i yelled at her because she got mad over me for treating my brother/sister cruelly when both my bro/sis actually was the first one to shout at me sometimes which is impolite in our family to shout at elders. She or my parents would take their side so i just sigh or leave it and kept telling myself its fine but its not and i kept saying i should keep my cries for late, i don't deserve the world, i don't deserve to have feelings or emotions. We all are humans and no one is perfect but they know they made mistake and just never tried to change. Right now I'm speechless, i cannot even talk properly or message people properly because of whatever I'm feeling lately. I hope you understand that so many people love you even if they don't show. Pls tell me that you're fine now
Luckily the mom want to understand her. My mom was never like that. She keep saying that she’s also having a tough time and keep comparing with mine. I know its hard for my mom since she got divorced at 49 years old. But its hard for me too. She lose a husband but my mom tend to forget that i lose a father too. Since they get divorce i never contact my father anymore since my mom doesnt really like it. My father also never try to contact me either. I have 2 younger brother and 1 younger sister to care about. Since i am the only one that can drive in the family besides my mom, i always took the responsibility to drive my younger sister and brother back to their school or hostel eventhough i have a really bad backpain. When my mom get sick, i always make sure the house clean since if i sat at home and just get rest, my mom would scold me. I’m always tired doing house chores but my mom rarely compliment me for doing that . I have no close friends either. I’m so lonely nowadays. Hmmmm
I hope you’re okay! Thank you for being so hardworking and helping out your mum! You’re doing well! Remember you’re not alone :) and as weird as it is, a stranger from across the world is thinking of you :)
Same. Except my dad has been abusive and has a girlfriend but they haven't divorced yet. We suffered for so long and I knew it was my mom that suffered more. So I kept quiet for 7 years. Suddenly, as I got older these things during my childhood got to me along with a competitive school and pressure to get good grades. And being an outcast. But when I told my mom I need help finally, she said that I have no reason to be. I love her and she loves me too. And she went through an extremely hard time for so long but she forgets that I was just a kid when I saw all of it
This is the first time I feel so related to a story. Till now at 28, when I tell my mom I'm sad n life is tough, she replied the same as the mom, "I have tougher life than you, i dont understand why you keep complaining ". And my dream was the same as the daughter, to have a stable job. This is my greatest regret. I hope I can go to this girl and tell her my experience. Own your life!
This is why I don't talk my problems to my parents because one time when I was like starting to share "I think I am having a hard time" they just laugh then my parents would tell the exact thing such as like " Do you think we are not having a hard time? Do you thing you are suffering more than we do?" Since then I always keep them to myself and make a cover for them not to see whats inside
This family should be proud that they have raised such a kind and amazing daughter. I hope they will continue to raise her well, and hopefully she continue to be as happy as she is after this.
I love how her mom understand that sometimes her daughter was feeling tired emotional and physical. How she's not forcing her to do things because she completely understand her daughter.
Imagine how hard it is to be depressed in a country like Korea. Ugh. It's 2018 already. Can't the elders acknowledge the fact that mental health is important and that people need help??????????? depression is a battlefield and it's impossible to win in just one try. it's a slow and a continuous process, and sometimes it takes years. especially if you're alone through the journey--- that's harder. it's annoying how parents keep on saying "i've had a harder time than you". Like for the nth time, this isn't a contest of who've had the greater pain/suffering!!!
This is the first time I never truly blame anyone. I admire the daughter so much. Mom and dad have faults too but I cannot blame them. I can understand her dad's side as the head of the family. He may not be good at expressing himself in words but I can see that he is a pretty calm dad and he works hard for the family. His job can be stressful too. It may be awkward at first but I hope he continues to say what he said at the end to his daughter. I can also understand her mom. It's not easy to give birth at older age and she has sickness too. Her mom is pretty considerate too. That's why she sent her concern for this show. She doesn't want to burden her husband although she ends up relying on her daughter too much. For the middle child, well, he is just a boy being boy. Hopefully soon, when he's older he can be a son the family can rely on. For the daughter, after this show, many people admire you. What a selfless and kind daughter! Love your family but focus more on yourself too.
I agree. I've heard a lot that the people who come are linked to professionals behind the scenes before and after. I don't know how true that is. And before, they only showed doctor advice for other organic issues than mental health.
Sohyun Pak but people treat it as such. none of these people are qualified enough to give others advice on something as important as child care or mental health. its just not right
@@peemaster123 they know that it's not to replace any professional help, the show also do help people off-camera that you don't see and you can research yourself.
This reminded me when I was 15. I was really depressed and subtly told my mom. Guess what she said? "Stop complaining and just *enjoy* it !" It felt like she forced me to continuendrink some toxic when I already suffering. Not to mention they got angry at me because I never smiled or laughed anymore. Come on, I wanted to die, okay? And because I couldnt explain due to their response, they turned manipulative and verbally abusive to me. Fast forward six years later, I haven't really healed. My pain and healing will come in waves. But... It got better. A little bit better each day, in case one of you reading this is having the same experience.
I never remembered being loved bc my parents wanted a boy. I felt like a disappointment and it is my fault for not being a boy and l felt guilty for it. (During my early teenage years 9-12yo, l tried to act like a boy as a way to feel a tiny bit better XD) my brother was Bron when l was 7and l got in the same situation as this girl. Each time l complain about negative feelings, my mom would tell me how her childhood was harder and l should be happy and stop being a selfish brat. I get yelled at for not smiling too and even now, l find it hard to express love toward ppl l care for. It is awkward, ldk how. My brother is 14, he only household chore he does is walk to the fridge and eat something. I want to die, l told my mom once and she handled me her pain medication and told me a bottle would be enough to kill me. She also said l am so self centered, l dont aknowledge her hardship and l dont deserve to be her daughter and to live. I guess my body is pretty strong coz l swallowed the whole bottle and survived. I tried suicide many times and quit before actually doing it coz l am a weak-willed pussy. I am just hiding all that and pretend l love my family and l love caring for my brother, clean the house and earn money for them. I am secretly starving myself hoping that will kill myself. I starve for so many reasons. It is weird but l somewhat want to live sometime and l starve so l can at least look pretty and get complimented by other ppl for superficial things as looks. I starve because l know ppl are going to treate me better if l am thin (l was humiliated by my own mother so many time because l was chubby when l was a teen). I am craving for the feeling of being liked even l know that if ppl like me for my looks, they don't really like me. I starve to be better at ballet, have more confidence when l play music, to be able to talk to ppl and be more outgoing. I also starve because my brother is severely overweight and the thinner l am, the fatter he looks beside me and it hurts my mother that he is overweight. My extended family makes jokes about him bullying me at home and eat all my food. I enjoyed that, I want him to suffer some of the stuff l endured. I starve because l hope l will die.
@@alice_in_wonderland9997 hey you, are you okay? Sorry for reading this too late and responding too late. Please, they dont deserve your life. Don't take your life, you are showing them that you are weak. Cry if you need to, dont bottle up. Its fine, its totally fine to cry. I used to be in that situation, but nowadays, I just think about what makes me happy. Keep thinking of happy things, do things that makes you happy, and if u cannot stand it anymore, than fight. If you can take a break from the relationship, then go somewhere far. Go away, run from it. Be idle for a while. No matter what you do, do it for the sake of your life. Stop thinking about others. You matter the most. If at all you are reading this, just know that there will always be a person care for you.
@@alice_in_wonderland9997 Not killing yourself isn't weak, it's brave. It shows that you are strong enough to deal with whatever shit people throw your way.
Wow parents who decide to have children later in life dont know how their older children feel. I feel like the parents need to step up their game since they want to have children again they shouldn't rely on their daughter so much. She is at that age where every little thing will set her off.
LOL I bet you 100% it was just an accident. It is actually really hard to keep from having an unwanted pregnancy when you are married and sexually active. They probably thought YAY...she is not fertile...lets get it on...and BAM...baby #3
@@dietgardenkittenmiau1996 there's something called condoms and other forms of birth control. The woman could've tied her tubes. Honestly. I hate how parents don't think of their other children before deciding to have another baby with that kind of age gap. This includes my parents. I am still very disappointed that they decided to have another kid 12 years later after I was born. I feel like Korean older generations don't like the idea of birth control bc it could mess with you and all, but gosh, just go use it. Or don't have sex at all. It's that simple. I don't like it when parents like those or even my parents don't think of the consequences later on with the other children bc obviously, the other children will feel super burdensome too. I was so angry when my dad said that my sister (who is 12 years younger than me) was born with a golden spoon, meaning that she has everything. Two parents who are happy, an older sister and older brother who got her back, a nice house, parents who could support, a older sister who is to become a doctor, everything a child could ask for a happy family. I was devastated. I really hope that parents are considerate of their other children before having unprotected sex; with a possibility of having another kid. It hurts when your life has to be adjusted just for that kid. If you plan to have another kid, don't look for help from your other kid. It's your responsibility to raise another human being and you made that decision to have sex without a condom. Don't rely on your other kids bc what happens is what that girl goes through. It's a real problem.
When she said "that is my way of dealing with my life" my heart breaks. Teenagers shouldn't have to deal with life, they should live a happy and hopeful life. Sadly a huge amount of people now a days aren't living but surviving. Parents sometimes don't realize what they are saying, and I haven't understand them yet. I mean it is so frustrating. They said pharses like "you can't hate your dad", "my life is harder than yours", "Did you said you are tired? You haven't done anything today"... I don't even know how to conclude this... This episode make me mad and emotional
@Zuala Zo i’m talking about the celebrity!! lshe raised her brothers while training in her preteens (12yr old) cause her family was poor and she didn’t have a mom either her dad was also sick and died three month before her debut
She's the best daughter/ sister/ firstborn. She's so considerate of her family more than herself. Her parents couldn't even see her sufferings. I think a lot of parents have the same mindset of "when i was at your age..." comparison and that's why they usually thought that their child and also whatever that is.. I honestly hate that..
This girl is so lovely and kind, I just got this feeling that I need to give her a huge hug all the time I see tears in her eyes. I feel so sorry for her and want her to feel better 'cause she totally deserves it!! Well, I think it's quite important to spread more loe these days so: Everyone who is reading this, fell hugged and lots of love from me ♥
I had exactly the same hurge ,i cried my eyes out and i wanted to hug her so much.I felt like i was seeing myself.And the fact that they didn't talk about her suicidal tought that much made me kinda sad.Cause I know that it's not enough for her to feel happy again .that if her parents rely on that day only for her to be happy then all that would have meant nothing.I just want her to be happy again .(sorry i'm not fluent in english 😅)
The problem is she is like a mum for the baby and not like a sister the roles switched . And the mother won t have her own role with the baby in the future . Sorry for my poor english .
i relate to her stress so much that i cried practically throughout the whole video, every time i express my pain i get " i suffer too" or "ive been at work all day too" i cry myself to sleep and wake up crying too, no one is aware of so though, they don't ask. I'm also at a point where even words don't mean anything, ive heard them so often and so repeatedly and have said the myself to other people i see struggling that i've sort of become immune to them, there's been probably two times i've snapped the first my dad understood and sympathized and my mum agreed with the issue at the time and the second my mum felt hurt by the words i said and told my sister who then spoke to me about it... which is so unfair to me. anytime anyone has troubles i listen to them wholeheartedly but when i have issues i should keep them to myself because it hurts others? i thought about giving everything up various times, but think the only reason i haven't given up is because i'm religious and i have a fear of what will happen to me if i end it since its against my religion to harm yourself in any way shape or form. al i do now is endure my pain and smile so that others aren't aware if the pain i'm in :)
@@xxamyy33 hi, can’t believe you replied to a two year comment but yeah, nothings really changed other than me getting older it, im not a super confrontational person so sometimes i just feel like i might aswell let it go seem as people won’t really ever change if that makes sense. i’ve always done that, writing down my feelings i mean, it’s kind of my own therapy session when i know no matter what i say or do won’t change anything. so i open my phone up and write everything i need to and feel while crying then put on some comfort songs or shows/dramas and try to forget everything. my mum won’t ever understand, no matter how much i express so i kind of gave up on that so i just plan on doing what i have to do securing myself and them moving out. like i said words and such don’t work on me anymore almost like going one ear and out the other but thanks for commenting that way i can see how much if anything has changed since i last wrote this.
i think this is the best concern I've ever watch...i can understand the situation they going through...but what i want to tell is i hope that her mom and dad can express their gratitude towards her more often n i know it much easy for woman or mom to express their feeling, but for man or dad,they different, they dont really express their feeling, they rather keep it inside their hearts instead of telling what they feel about, but i believe thier love towards her family never die and always growing day by day ... for me, the best medicine to cure her illness is to comfort her with nice sincerity words.
My younger siblings were born when I was 2, 4, 6, 9 and 11 year-old. I remember babysitting the fifth and youngest. I put them to sleep and that usually took I hour, did their laundry, play with them and etc. My parents took their first degrees part-time, and my mom even had the fifth and youngest in those 4 years. Once, I had to take a break from school for two weeks to take care of my baby sister when my parents sit for their exams, since they had no one to rely on taking care of the baby. Since I had many siblings at a very young age, my parents did not pay much attention to me since they had no choice but to take care of my younger siblings more. I had many thoughts of running away from home since I was tired of taking care of my younger siblings and lack of attention and care from my parents. I understand this girl's situation. I could see myself in her and all I want is hugging and listening to her.
@TheMystery30 only if they are boys, cause girls feels a lot more pressured to do things at home. And not only in Korea, this is everywhere! Moms and dads do a lot more to their boys than to their girls. They always expects the girl will help out at home since an early age. Help doing all types of chores and they end up relieving the boy from doing them. Every country has this. If not every, almost all.
@@juniaoliveira7466 and that's the reason it PISSES ME OFF. Idgaf whether my sibling is a boy or a girl. He or she MUST help out the same way to keep each other and to lean on one another. And honestly, I have (had) the same exact problem. My brother is 2 years younger and my sister is 12 years younger than me. My parents baby my brother way too much; my brother is 19 and he still doesn't know how to cook ramen in a pot. And bc he's clumsy, they think that he's going to set a fire in the house (he's very clumsy sadly) so they relied on me for everything. My dad said once he's dead, I have to take care of my brother. Like hello, go teach your son how to be an adult, that's not my job. I could help, but that's me voluntarily giving up my time so teach him. I did 90 percent of what a dad, husband should do. Being next to the mother, wife, helping raising the kid. It sickens me when they made a mistake of having a third child, and they expect me to help take care of the kid 24/7. My dad said "This is practice for you once you have your kid later." Like wtf? Lol don't assume that I'll have a kid bc no, sorry, I am not about to have kids bc of you. With a kind heart, of course I did help, but that does not mean that it is a must for me. They had sex without a condom and had a kid? That's your responsibility and not mine. I was so disappointed in my parents and I still am. I was ashamed of my parents because I felt like I didn't get a say in them having another kid because I knew they were going to rely on me and not on my brother to help raise this kid. I will one day tell them when they're much older. But man, the scar never goes away.. God bless this girl. She deserves the best in life.
@@윤민경-n8i I experienced almost the same thing, but my brother, instead, is 5 years older and have a son. Guess who makes good for the little guy? My brother doesn't even know how to cook rice! When we were younger he could do everything he wanted, but when I wanted to do the same, I was never allowed. The excuse was: he is a boy. I learned how to do everything in a house, while he was going out and having fun with friends. When he got a gf, she could sleep in my house with him, and when I got a bf, I couldn't even sleep in the same room, the excuse was, again, he is a boy and you are a girl! This sickens every girl, and sadly some of them pass this through life, for their children. We have to give the same education to our children, the gender is not an excuse.
@@juniaoliveira7466 amen sister. Man.. I'm sorry you had to go through that! It must've really made you angry and upset because the thing they used against you was that you were a girl. I just hope that after our parents generation passes, that no parents teaches their kids things based on gender or strict 1950s culture. It's just ridiculous.
@@윤민경-n8i I don't know if you believe in God, but I hope God hear you. Let's give the best education to the next generations! We girls can change the world, it starts with our closest younger ones. Hope life gets better for you, and for all of us.
i know it's too late to say this but honestly.....the parents didn't consider their daughter at all when they had a third child. parents need to make sure that their elder children are ready to have a sibling. it's preparation for EVERYONE, down to pets. i feel like it was incredibly insensitive to have a third child (with such a huge age gap) and except their children to help raise that child. people...please think super duper carefully about kids omfg
That's how I think of my parents and any other couples too. Please f-ing think before doing anything because it's so much stress for the kids too. Not only the parents, KIDS. TOO. If only they thought it through instead of rushing it inserting that into the other end. It's so sad.
This one honestly mad me she’d tears because I can relate to her, I’ve always tried to put others feelings and priorities before mine which always resulted in me suffering because I never took the time for my self and try to relieve all the Stress I have endured. She is honestly a strong young girl.
Me: Mom i have depression. Mom: cause you play phone to much! You don't go to church! You're lazy! You only say "yes" and not actually doing it! 🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃
“I’m afraid she’ll lose fans if she speaks up” This one really was hard to watch, seeing how upset and seeing he’s dad act like that, OOO I WANTED TO PUNCH HIM UNTIL HE FINALLY UNDERSTOOD.
ngl i started crying when i heard the daughter she's so sweet and considering, i could relate a bit too and it really hurt, i hope she's doing better now
The word "I love you" from your parents is the most thing that the children would love to hear, it might seems so cheesy and awkward for some parent to say that to their children, but with that one word can comfort your child. I lost my dad when I was 8y/o, and its been 11 years after that day. The most thing that I remembered he left me with is, he said "I love you my daughter"... I still remembered that clearly, as you guys know, sometimes our childhood memories might be blurr and we can't remember everything but I could remember that simple moment. "I love you" is like a magic word that people can remember it clearly🤍
This girl is amazing, I think we the same age, you so strong girl! I already watch it 2 times 2 years ago and this year but I still cried😭... girl I know how you feel, hope you doing well now!!!
This show does a whole lot more better job at counseling than my school does for their students a friend of mines said the counselors are even hard of understanding and very judgmental so when i showed her this program she loved it even though she isnt into k culture with the subtitles on these videos she watches alot of their episodes and wish if she had a chance to go on the show one day she'll gladly take it. I learn from this show too to try to be there for her because I don't have such a hard time anymore unlike her so thanks to the hello counselor team 💜 i purple you guys
![Obese girl's mom and brother call her a pig (shock therapy?). [Hello Counselor/ENG, THA/2019.02.25]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/ECLYULep700/mqdefault.jpg)
![Obese girl's mom and brother call her a pig (shock therapy?). [Hello Counselor/ENG, THA/2019.02.25]](/img/tr.png)
![No one in this family is on my side. [Hello Counselor/ENG, THA/2019.01.14]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/T7KZvo4xVLs/mqdefault.jpg)
![She's upset because of her husband, who favors their younger son[Hello Counselor ENG,THA/2018.09.17]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/VZtMYc6dbqg/mqdefault.jpg)
her smile displays "i'm fine", but shouts "save me"...
*_cries in the corner_*
yess
Yes..we only smile for you..thats not how we truly feels..
🥺
wait was this a bts reference?
@@shotabdi4868 thats exactly what i thought
Children could never complain about how hard their life is because parents will always tell them that they suffered a lot more than them :3
Example " do you know how hurt i am born you" imean who human in this world didn't has a problem
elle that’s what my parents said to me
i have always been extremely introverted and down and i really hope i can see a therapist one day to know if i am going through depression since i dont wanna self diagnose, but i never told my parents how ive been feeling all the time and this one time i had a really bad breakdown that they witnessed, but they dismissed everything as puberty and asked me to go to sleep! i even tried to tell them that ive been suffering and i struggled with this bc i never told anyone, and i probably would never try again. i started going through this at 9 and i still am not sure what's causing it now. but i know for sure i can't say i love my family, especially since being caned as punishment since a young age. i reject affection a lot now bc of this, like even hugging them makes me uncomfy, sometimes i feel i hate them, and hate is a strong word. the omly people i can really talk to and seek advice from is my friend, who is going thru hard times too, and my online friends.
yes, sometime they put on blame to kids but did ever parents asking their kids is facing now?
elle well I'm quite opposite I never complain or show negativity because I don't want them to suffer even do I get hurt inside
Most of the parents are doing this mistake. You should not tell your children "i have suffered more" or "its not a big deal compared to the things that i have gone through" etc.. when they say its hard for them,they are saying this to you because they have to share their emotions. They trust you. They want you to understand them. That's all they want. When you say "its not a big deal" they will stop sharing their emotions and will bottle them up. Its not good for them. Why can't you just say comfortable things to them.atleast just let them know that you appreciate them.
SAY IT LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK!!
kai sui this is so true. My mom always said that to me
that's what happened to me and I once attempted suicide you i said what the teenager said and you know till this day i sufferer from anxiety and depression you are right you shouldn't say that to your child.
Seriously, a few years ago I opened up to my mom about my struggles and she talked about how she came to the US empty handed so she could raise me and my siblings here and we could have an "easier" life than one in her country. Which I UNDERSTAND but I wish she could say more than "I don't understand why you're so stressed when life is so easy here and you have so many school/work opportunities". I don't talk to her about this kind of stuff anymore lmao
@@cinnarenaroll1292 i understand too
When will they realize its not a competition for who struggled more in their youth? 😭💀
ikr
Exactly
Right? This ain’t *The struggle Olympics* 🙄
This is the reason this world has become hell
It’s about nipping the issue at the roots before it becomes extreme. If a parent went through the same thing, they’d want to help their kid especially if the parent didn’t have access to mental healthcare like that back then.
"Look the audience is crying"
I'M CRYING TOO-
Awww they care so much
same 😭
honestly, i have never seen someone as selfless as the daughter. she is always prioritising her family before self, which is something we rarely see in our society. it is sad at the same time though, with her brother and all, but i think the least that her parents can do is to acknowledge her efforts or appreciate her for what she is doing? and not venting their anger on her. she is tired too, as much as them. a word of encouragement does not hurt anyone.
Hello my name is her but 4 years younger. With only 1 parent who doesn't work, smokes all day and 1 brother that almost 2 months so i dont have help.
@@leefelixsegg2666 That must be harsh. Keep on living pls, one day you'll get the life you deserve. ♡ I know words won't do much but I really wish you the best.
phoephoe thanks
Ikr.. she is so mature for he age
and the one sending concern is her mother not her
She deserves a very bright future for doing this in her teenage days
That was me.....I literally cried watching this. I have a sister who is 12 years younger than me and it felt like HELL. I seriously thought of committing suicide so many times because I was so stressed out. I hated it when people called me the "작은 엄마 (little mom)." I was so disappointed in my parents because i thought that I didn't have a say in having another sibling who is that young. I knew what was ahead of me. and because my brother who is two years younger, the oldest male in my paternal side and him being the only son; also the fact that he doesn't know how to properly take care of his own self, they baby him and they don't rely on him because he is very clumsy like a 3rd grader. I knew with my dad being a traditional Korean, HE WOULD NOT HELP MY MOM OR TAKE CARE OF HIS YOUNGEST CHILD; despite the fact that my sister was his third kid (THAT'S PRETTY SAD). It's so sad to see this girl go through the same thing.. I wish that she gets the best out of life once her little sibling is a little older. Once they're 6 years old, it's not that bad.
Hunny I did this in my CHILDREN days up to teenage days, now ADULT days.
@@j-hope47 what's your point?
@@윤민경-n8i I am from India. I burst into tears after watching the daughter. Such a mature, considerate, lovely, responsible kid. It must be really really hard for you with the traditional environment (house chores and looking after baby belongs to women) during those days. Wish you both very very heart warming, gifted happy life.
@@j-hope47 do you want a cookie?
This is the most selfless and kind girl I've ever seen like omg. PROTECT HER!!!!
I wanna be her friend and protect her so badly.. poor sweetheart 😭
I actually feel like this girl is like me.... I want to tell her : hey your not alone, I'm the same as you so let's cheers eatch other
Sorry for my bad english
I want to give her a hug and so much more I hope she is better now
@variety addict EXACTLY!!! Say it to the people in the back🙄
@@l123-o4t Actually you're English is so good😁
i think asian parents always use the phrase "when i was your age" or "you think you're stressed? think about how much i have to endure blahblahblah"
Same here. Iam also Asian but an indian family.
Also arabs
Not only Asians btw
man..my mom always said the phrase "when i was ur age" so many time and it's annoying as fuck
Same as African parents
"Her dream is to have a stable job"
Same girl, same. But seriously, she's very considerate, kind and understanding at such a young age.
She deserves to be helped and vent out her anger without people getting angry at heritage
thats literally everyone doe? whats worse is that she didn't have any other goals beyond that
Rewatching this program after 5 years I got a Dejavu about one of my close friend.She's not come from wealthy family, but she's one of top students in her section at school and got best marks for enter an university. But that's the time her youngest brother was born, when she was 20. So she had to forget about her dreams and get a job. Now she's a employee working hard to support her family to raise her brother while we, her other friends living our best life. It's been 2 years and she still regret about her life💔 we feel so sorry for her even though we have no lot of options than facing to it with her.
Mom: "don't burden yourself"
Also mom when her daughter said she's having a hard time: "i'm in pain too. It'S NoT ONly yOu thAT iS suFfeRing. StOp whiNiNg and GeT baCk To wORk!"
true and when you have problems you often just keep it to yourself because they’ll have the respond with “that’s nothing to what I had to go through”
Banchan’s regular exactly
honestly I hate it when people say that their pain was worse or they've had more and/or worse hardships. When parents do that... I hate it the most. It's like
"Mom I'm having a hard time"
and instead of comforting or whatever the child needs...
"Oh, yOu ThInK yOuR lIfE iS tOuGh? I had to *insert something that would make others feel bad*"
Doing that would either make it feel like the child can't rely on their parent or the child would want to help out with their parents' problems and pretend as if nothing is bothering them.
Couldnt agree more to what you said. I hate it when they invalidate other people's sufferings just because they think they're having a hard time more than the others.
Right!! my dad always brings up how he lived through war like.... that sucks but we're talking about me rn
Older generations are so dismissive of younger people's feelings. Your kids are not saying they have it worse than you did, they just want you to listen. That's all it takes most of the time to make a person feel better, to be listened to.
People being forced to suppress their feelings is why we have a huge suicide problem worldwide.
JUST LISTEN TO YOUR CHILDREN, PARENTS! IT'S NOT A DIFFICULT THING TO DO!
my mom is like that too, when i say, i stress and hurt, she say she more stress and hurt in the past, made me feel more bad... 😢
Ikr. As well as, why do we need to suffer when we didn’t even do anything wrong! Parents! Why are all of you sooo STUPID! We’re telling we’re tired and you’re saying taht your life is tougher because of us! So what!? You were the one who decided to make us!!! You see those people with family havinga hard time and then you will make us and then when we complain and say that it’s your fault because you made us .. you are going to say if I only knew that you would be like this! Da heck! For real!this is not some kind of fairy tale where your daughter or son would be different from others and when you will have a family it would be like you imagined !! Duhhhhhhh my gad wake up.. why are we the kids smarter than you idiots!
They parentified their child, now they're shocked and confused cause she has depression. A mess
True that
Chanel Wilson
Lmao yes
That's actually a really great term. They really did basically turn their kid into a parent. Poor thing. :(
Yeah, everyone was shocked when I had depression and PTSD. They all tell me to forgive my abusive father and shit.
yup
*I laughed so hard when his younger brother said he is happy and continued talking*
lmaoooooo me too
Guess we all should live like his brother.
the part when he lies down HAHAHAHAH
"She wasn't born in your times, sir."
Yo that's the truth duh
Can we talk about the fact that they really glossed over the part about her suicidal thoughts. That's not just a mild case of depression. She seems like a pretty realistic girl, so I doubt that was exaggeration which means she really needs to get some help. Her dad occasionally forcing himself to tell her he loves her isn't going to help. It's just going to make her feel even more obligated to help her parents out. The mindset of, "my parents are going out of their way now to make me feel better, I should stop whining and help more." isn't going to help her at all, because that isn't the case. Her parents are doing the bare minimum to help her emotionally, and them suddenly going up a level still isn't enough. But it'll seem like such a dramatic shift to her that she'll think she doesn't have the right to complain anymore. She clearly has no support system at home, and that doesn't look like it'll change any time soon. By making her feel obligated to help out, she's going to put off her own health in consideration of others. And when you have suicidal thoughts, and are crying yourself to sleep at night, it's just all going to go downhill. I really doubt it, but I hope her parents had a wake up call and actually try to get her some help.
Unfortunately, South Korea has such a dismal view of mental illness (as shown here by their disregard of her suicidal statements, and the fact that they thought her being thanked would be enough to stop these emotions) that I doubt they'll seek professional help, and will most likely end up telling her to suck it up. Just like when the dad decided his daughter's feelings didn't matter because he had a harder childhood. That's not how emotions work, and just because you deem someone else to have suffered more, doesn't make your suffering any less. You haven't experienced their suffering, so your level of bad may not be horrible compared to them, but to you, it is the worst you have felt. And that is something that shouldn't be ignored or compared.
The same way parents tell kids that a failed test, or a mental breakdown over school isn't the end of the world. Parents know that because they now have some perspective of other things in life that are worse. However, kids don't have this perspective. And what they experience today is the worst they have ever felt, because they are only part way through their lives. If a person hasn't experienced worse, then their experience now is classed as the worst until another experience occurs where they can go, "oh, this is worse than that". This a personal thing, and not something we can compare between people.
My father's reactions towards me and comments are similar but I was lucky to have a compassionate mom.
My dad says things like he had to take care of his alcoholic dad growing up or he lost his mom young or his first wife died as an excuse to make me feel guilty for not being always happy. If I cry he shouts at me, if I have a panic attack he tells me that I'm not able for the world and should be locked in a tower like Rapunzel. He has insinuated that I'm a whore because he found a condom in my room and told me my boyfriend of a year at the time only wants me for sex and I was 20. He made me guilty for being human and I feel like people need to take this seriously. I know I went on a tangent but I really felt for the girl because of my experience. She needs therapy and she needs love and care. I hate when people downplay the suffering of others and don't let them feel how they are feeling. It doesn't matter if people experienced worse your feelings are always valid. I have a lot of anxiety and I was at one point depressed. The thing is when your parents treat you like that it follows you. You let friends and partners treat you that way until you realize you deserve more.
I totally wish more people have that viewpoint about hardship and pain and that it is relative to your own experiences and you can't compare what it's like for different people. I was exactly the same as her when I was young. I used to cry myself to sleep and thought about suicide almost every night and it felt like I was just in a black hole that I didn't know how to get out of. On top of that my parents didn't believe in psychologists and thought it was a waste of money. I told my dad I was depressed and he just told me that this is what real life is like and that I just had to deal with it and it's not all blue skies and sunshine. I used to wanna killed myself just out of spite so they'd find me dead and feel guilty. That was 15 years ago though but even now I still struggle a bit despite having a career and a life as an adult....just seems really easy to just lay down and never get up again some days.
thank you so much for making my day 😭💚
I truly hope that the chanel will read the comment section because issues like this a definitely ignore based on the videos ive seen so far
As a Korean myself, I 100% agree and it really saddens me that such serious topics are glossed over. I am like the 5% (I’m guesstimating I have no idea but it’s not a large percent) of Koreans that actually talk about mental health and such with people and try to help my other Korean friends open up about their issues. I feel like the show shouldn’t have made it seem like not a big deal because it’s a problem to ignore mental health. But at the same time, I’m glad they didn’t give her any bad advice since they aren’t professionals. And it did seem like some of them did care, like Sunmi for example, who brought it up and seemed concerned (although again it was brushed off). The audience too were crying and such. The cast seemed like they wanted to cheer her up but didn’t approach it correctly because they didn’t really know HOW to...
I’ve heard that koreans tend to downplay mental disorders such as depression or anxiety, but i only started to believe it now, after i saw this video. I can’t believe that they’re not bringing up about the daughter’s suicidal thoughts and depression; instead they ask unimportant things such as having the middle brother lie beside the baby. She said that she thought of ending her life. And nobody even brought that up. Heck, some of the guests even said that it wasn’t a concern.
As someone who’s not quite depressed but has low self esteem, second guesses herself, worries a lot, and think that she’s not good enough, i can say that praises aren’t going to lift my spirits up enough that i erase all negativity from my life-it’s my point of view, at least. Because deep down, even if i were to be lathered in praises and compliments, i would doubt the sincerity of the praises-the feeling of not being good enough comes from within the self, further reinforced by external impacts, such as, in this case, the parents telling her that what she’s going through wasn’t as tough as what they went through. Of course while this is true for me, the daughter might get all better just by expressions of love and gratefulness. However the panel really needs to emphasise more on the fact that she contemplated suicide-to me that’s a red flag and she needs professional help.
Another thing is that pain on her knee. 16 year olds shouldn’t be feeling pain that old women would. The description of the pain is like hammering so i imagine that it’s quite severe, so if i were her i’d go to the doctor and check if anything’s wrong with her bone. Who knows if it might have been a problem with the development of the bone or maybe a problem with her nerves.
Not all of them, but there is a stigma in society because they're still conservative in general. Of course, new generations are more open minded and it will eventually change. Everything is a process.
dude i ''only'' have seasonal depressive episodes who mostly moderate, when i had a breakdown last year from literally nothing, i thought i was going crazy. i had no strength left in me and ended up being sedated, but even then i never thought of ending my life. CANNOT imagine what this child must feel. all throughout this video i thought please get this girl mental help asap, they need to realize that shes actually sick... her pain must be beyond horrendous. i hope that shell get better. they walking on thin ice and downplay tf outta it...damn...
I agree. 😡
lmao and she also does cheerleading on the side like o.O it's no wonder why her knee messed up (im afraid she might resent the baby when she's older tho. I mean she's has a really good heart and all but she's human too and she might do random outbursts of anger that she didn't mean to do or say.)
The way she bobs up and down while carrying her brother looks really hard on the knee. She puts her whole weight on one knee to bob up and down, so one knee is taking all her weight plus baby's, for hours a day.
I HATE it every time I say “I’m having a really hard time, I’m tired, can’t do this, too much stress” and my parents, mostly my mom, would be like “why? You think *you’re* stressed? I have to take care of you three blah blah blah” which is just like wth.
Teens get stressed too from too much homework, studying too much, and having other things to do out of school that makes us worry about two things, school and non-school related things. Parents, and adults in general, should stop saying that us teens don’t know what stress is or “you think you’re having a hard time? I’m having an even worse time than you” like do they not get that it’ll make it harder for us who are having a hard time? I’m no expert but I think it can lead to serious depression because it’ll make some of us think that our parents don’t care how we feel.
Exactly I feel like my parents don't give a shit about how I feel and keep telling me to be thankful I hate it
i actually used to have depression and managed to get out of it, when i still have depression, i wouldn't tepl anybody, because i know their reactions will be like that. (Ex : you think im not tired?)
Kookie Monstar yea exactly like we are not adults so our stresses are different from theirs . they can’t expect young people to have the same things to stress about.
just another music lover it’s because they are down playing that such a young person could have something to stress about. I hate that too. Our generation is so different from our parents. They could never understand us fully of our day to day struggles living. We will never experience what our parents went through because we weren’t born in their generation and they can never experience what we are going through because they weren’t born in our generation. It’s sad but you need to talk to your parents about not assuming what life experiences should and shouldn’t be considered stressful in your life. Say that you understand to being humble and thankful but that you want them to understand that you too have struggles and until you realize to overcome them that you need their support to get through it by acknowledging that it is a struggle for you and that you can easily overcome it if you get their support and acknowledge of the struggle. If not then your relationship will get worse with them if you can’t trust them to help deal with something that they deem small. If they think it’s nothing then it’s like saying your worth is nothing. I know this was a long post but i had this struggle with my parents not acknowledging my stresses, and until I fully talked to them about how it makes me feel when they ignored it, it made my parents realize that all I need is for them to be there for me and I will eventually get over it. If they hadn’t acknowledged my stresses I know I wouldn’t have overcome them. So really talk to your parents about it and you can use my post for notes on what to say to them because now I have parents who understand!
Exactly, our young age doesn't mean we don't feel pain. Just because we're young doesn't mean we're happy. It seems like adults don't understand that. They were happy at our age, but we're sad at this age. Our generation is just so broken.
I saw this tweet that resonated with me a while ago. It went something along the lines of "Did you have a childhood or were you the oldest child?"
I'm the 4th but my little brother and I have an age difference and I had to baby sit my little brother. Since all of my siblings are old I had to babysit
I’m the youngest after my baby brother, but I still didn’t have a proper childhood, coz my mom made me do chores since I was 8 and my brother was born when I was 10 so I still have a hard time
Rebecca Tang I’m have one older sibling but it’s safe to say that I didn’t have a childhood and at this point I’ve made it my goal to get away from this household because I know that’s the one thing that’s gonna heal me. Endurance.
i am the oldest T_T
im the youngest of my family, but whenever my older sister does anything wrong im the one who gets yelled at lol
The fact that whenever she tells her parents that she is going through a rough time and they would reply that they are having a rougher time is what all of us have experienced and what made us decide not to tell them our problems because we think we would be a burden to them.
True .. It also got to the point of questioning ourselves like
"Why did i even get born in this world?"
and all negative thinking just flooded your mind when that happens .. Still you smile even when your hurting deep inside ..
It would have been nice if her parents had complimented her and apologized to her. I don't understand why parents can never apologize. The daughter is trying her to best to help out in a difficult situation she didn't create. The parents are responsible for how many children they have and how they manage the household. It sounds like they never said thank you, didn't listen to her, and ignored her concerns. I think the mom was trying to make amends but she needs to do more (both parents do). But there is no solution. The mom didn't promise to ask the middle son to help more, dad didn't agree to help more. I'm worried for the daughter--she has depression and her reality doesn't seem like it will change. She's a lovely person.
i agree. her parents should do more because it's their baby. not her daughter baby.
Yeah, I hope things get better, but it was left a little vague. And, I do wish the parents had practiced birth control protected sex =/ the mom had her first child after 40 and her second six years later... idk it didn't seem planned and I feel like they should have been more responsible and thought ahead =( a lot of their current burden could have been prevented, like the mom's health, financial burden, and daughter's severe depression =(
parents are too proud to apologize. they think they're always right
In the end, if the daughter is dead by now, We know who to blame.
Haha Asian parents never apologized. Like never.
My mom would step on my foot by accident, instead of saying "sorry" she just makes a "Oo"
This concern was so heartbreaking, what a selfless daughter :(((
Depression is like drowning but you can see everyone breathing...
Yep that sums it up
Hits hard
Parent: puts on a lullaby
Baby: cries
Parent: why won’t u sleep
Baby: still cries
Sister: puts on pop music
Baby: sleeps
😂🤣😂🤣
BTS AND BT21 ARMY that’s me😂😂
Lol
I can tell the Baby is a Reveluv 😂
Me as a baby:
The fact that my brother sleeps when we sing and dance to kpop 😂
Father, did you see how your daughter reacted when you enumerated all the things you did when you were young? You saw how disappointed see is? She is suffering of depression, something she's fighting up all inside her. She needs support from inside and she needs all the support she can get.
please dont blame the father or mother ,when you become parent you would understand, harsh thhigs can be blessing.the sad part is tthat the dad was also sufering
@@nchumnhumt everyone is suffering in life, it's stupid, ignorant, and immature to say harsh things to a child over it. You survived the trauma you went through, so why wont you try to make your child have a childhood, instead of making them a parent at the age of 10-15 just because you and your partner is too incompetent to communicate.
Take responsibilities or give her up, people who pushes their responsibilities onto their children are hopeless.
The dad downplays the daughter's hardships. The mom uses guilt and victimization to trap the daughter. The mom is weak and all that but why does she have to yell at the daughter about showing her emotions on her face? If the daughter cant show her emotions at home freely..where else will she be able to do it? If she cant talk to her family about hoe hard life is...who else will gice her advice on how to navigate these hardships based on their experiences? You cant say "this is easier than working 9-5" or "this is nothing compared to working in a field" when the daughter has no frame of reference....makes me angry....
This is how it is in Asian continents
my life is just like this girl's; my household is almost the same--I'm the oldest of 4 girls. my parents do the same, and it's resulted in me bottling up everything. I use art as a stress-reliever now, but it kinda sucks because I'm a junior in high school and my stress/anxiety/low self-esteem is at its peaks. I'm a passive girl as well, so it's very difficult for me to talk in general. my parents can get hypocritical too; wanting me to talk but when I do they say I'm talking back and have no respect. it's sad to say that I've just gotten used to it now
I'm an only child, and when I break down in front of my parents or I scream at them because I really felt a whirlwind of emotions and I don't know how to manage them (it's really overwhelming), they get mad and make me stop whining bc the neighbors might hear it- I really got mad when my mom mentioned that bc I think she's too ashamed of me whining like a kid but I have no choice; I have no other way to show it :(
Can relate to this😭😭
I can relate to the daughter. It's actually the first time I'm crying while watching Hello Counselor. I'm the oldest daughter in my family as well, and I have three younger brother. It can really tough at times, but I can't share with anyone, because my parents expect me to be mature enough to not 'whine'. I just bottle it up inside that it's suffocating at times. And as the oldest, parents whining something in front of you isn't something new. My family going through financial crisis for several years now, and it's just so frustrating to see my parents didn't talk to each other or when my mom always whine to me about my father or anything he did. I'm growing up with all that, without any personal space to cry (I don't have my own bedroom, I share it with my aunt who living with my family) or anyone to talk to. If I want to talk about these things to my friend, I just thought that it wouldn't be appropriate or they would just brush it off like it's nothing.
Please seek a therapist for the daughter. She's hitting some major depression peaks there - so please help before her thoughts swallow her whole.
I totally agree.i do hope she gets professional help and all the love and recognition she deserves. Saranghe
How can ypu tell she has depression?
Thank you for saying this. I'm a therapist. This beautiful girl needs someone to talk to, to validate her feelings, to not judge, to understand and empathize and help her see that SHE MATTERS and is a blessing to others, even if her mom doesn't recognize it. Thats why I wish this show would have a professional on the panel when discussing serious issues like this. Its fine to have them give advice but that's no enough.
ratu k
It is mentioned in the video. .-.
Raeigne Vindric I never watched the whole video
When they said that *her pain was hidden behind her smile* that hit me hard
edit : i just wanna say thank you for your kind words and advices, also if you're facing the same problem as mine, stay strong and keep your head up. i love you and we will fight this together ❤️
i have taken depression tests many times , and the results always shows that i'm depressed , even my counselor at school once called my mother to seek for professional help . but my mother never acknowledge it , instead she would say things like , i'm being weak , and she had worse when she was my age . it got me thinking that i got no one to talk to . whenever i tried to talk to my close friends , i thought that i'm a trouble for them . i tried commit suicide for 2 times now and i failed . now i can't wait to study abroad and leave my family , because i know that's what they want .
Girl I love u. If I there I would help u. I also suffer in depression not only me all the human being are suffering like this. Parents sometimes dont understand the point. I understand u bcs I know it
@@muniandy5293 thank you :)
I relate to you so much. I have depression too and my mom say things like "I am being dramatic" "you don't know what I went through". Sometimes its just too hard for me. I have made the same plan as you, to study abroad and finally free myself from here where there's no freedom. I hope you all the best! and we may not know each other but you can always talk to me if you want:) I like being friends with everyone!
I hope you being better right now,if you dont have anyone to trust you can share your problem with stranger instead
@@__littledreams thank you so much :)
My parents: "Do this/that."
Me: "I'm tired/ it's to hard. Can I do it later?"
My parents: " In our old days, when we were your age we worked twice as hard but we never complained. So why are you complaining?"
Me: "Nevermind, i'll do it.."
But, honestly I was actually tired and do I want to start a whole argument on this topic? No. Just because I'm a girl or I'm smiling doesn't mean it's hard on me too. I have school and that is already stressful enough, but I wouldn't complain because I understood my parents also had their struggles. But, when I would get home, I had to do my chores and take care of my younger sibling. Along with that I had school work. Sometimes I would even have to stay up to finish my assignment(s). People might think school is easy but, as you're getting into other grades it becomes hard. We get more classes then usual so we work twice as hard too. It gets serious. I just wanted to point this out because parents sometimes don't get "school" is hard too and expect us to handle extra hard work. But, to anyone who is struggling on this same problem. Stay strong! Fighting!
that always happens to me😢😢😢
even though I'm the youngest but my parents just put pressure to me just because they have no faith in my older siblings 💔😢
the fact that I just finished high school also doesn't help either cuz they keep on bothering me and keep me from seeing my friends 😫😫😫
Your parents are exactly like mine they are like: oh our parents told to do that and those but we never complained ....
I am facing the same problem as u....... I work my ass out n then u see ur brother sitting comfortably playing games.... N mom doesn't even bother
She truly is the gem of her family. So selfless. Hope she finds what she really wanted in the future, something that can make her genuinely happy. Something for herself.
people shouldnt have kids if they cant take care of them, end of the day, its always the kids who suffer
AGREE =( I don't understand how ppl can just have a child all loosey goosey. It's one of the biggest decisions you'll ever make in your life. Think it through for a minute😒
AGREE
Springflower 133 agreee..
Tell that to my parents
@@orangetornado5937 same😭
I want to hug her so bad right now what a selfless and mature girl 😢 and its good to see her mom's trying to understand her and sent this concern.
Finally someone who cut the mother some slack...everybody's mad at her & so am i , but like...atleast she cared enough to contact the show so they can sit down & figure this out.
@@laayeshzeyneb8853 Yes, the fact that the mother tried to connect to her on a more emotional level and stepped in, is praiseworthy. Its not an easy move to give in and be a good listener, let alone deciding to be on national TV and talk about your household problem. Even to admit your mistakes to your children is hard, like how many of parents really notice or admit that. Most if not all of the time parents are confident that they are always right no matter what. Its easier said than done and I've noticed that some of the people here only know how to complaint etc every single time without trying to understand everyone's involved perspective.
"The pain behind her smile" a normal title for kids concern or problem, this is a normal things for kids these days, I got a lot of friends who diagnoses with depression, ngl but even myself diagnoses with depression✌️❤️, pls help kids these days 😭💔✨
i love the way her mom acknowledge her daughter hard work and speak truthfully in this show, i can see she's a good person
When she started describing her depression and suicidal thoughts I felt for her. I know what that feels like and to have parents that say "I've had it worse". In my case, it wasn't until I was officially diagnosed with depression, anxiety, and OCD that my parents changed. I sincerely hope that she talks to a professional and leads a long healthy life where she is happy.
i know this is every late but i hope that all good things come your way and be happy!
the guy who said it's not a concern would probably do the same thing to his children and when he finds out they have depression he'd probably call them selfish or something like does he not realize she literally said she wanted to kill herself? That alone makes it automatically a concern
I honestly can’t believe him. Does he realize how big of an issue this is? She said that she wants to KILL herself. This is definitely a problem and she should get professional help immediately. I honestly don’t know what was going on through some of those people’s heads while they said it wasn’t a problem. Ignorance. It’s disturbing. That poor girl. I hope she gets better..
I was a bit surprised when they didn't even ask him why he thought that way. Who is he?
@@354el He is member of Nuest. If i not mistaken his name is Ren.
poodle noodle probably because he’s a kpop member and they’re scared that his fans will attack the show by questioning him
honestly that was so small minded of him
@@354el I'm thinking they didn't want to make a big deal of it especially when they seemed to come to a good conclusion
Actually depression comes from family or parents ..sad but true
gul liver it doesn’t always so stfu about stuff you don’t know about
@@biankas.5038 lol why u triggered...u r the one who need to stfu i have nothing to do with you
I know this is realllyyyyy late but, depression isn’t just a genetic thing. Yes people who have a family history of depression or any other illness are more likely but you can develop it from trauma, or any specific event, your diet, things in your life, etc. It isn’t just a genetic thing, you can develop it overtime.
@@safa-pf3wj what she meant was depression can sprout from families putting you down. when your parents compares you to other kids who do better or lowering your self esteem until you crumble.
yoona stole jimin's underwear ohh I misunderstood completely lol. That’s also very true yes. I thought she meant it was only genetic, thanks for that!
When she immediately picks up her brother, it stopped crying. The baby automatically knew her scent. In that scenario alone, anyone can tell that she really do spend more time and endearment towards him. I love her. She's one of a kind.
I also babysit my younger sister and my dad also told me “she seems to hate you, she doesnt want to be with you” and them my mom would also said “why are you acting like that?why do u look so upset??!” smth like that so when i was eleven i began to change i’ve been so cold and now that i’m 13 i’ve been having the same problem as hers i often thought of suicide but then i wondered if theyre gonna even cry.I’ve never told them abt this and i just decided to cry to sleep everynight,my dad would even open my door to see if i was sleeping at 1 am but i always sleep around 3 am just to cry and then in the morning when my eyes are so puffy my mom would say “seems like you’ve slept well too much” they could see the change towards my behaviour but they look at how they trait me.I’ve been doing well at school i even rank 1st but them my mom would boast abt it at social media that i ranked 1st, but she never told me in person that she is proud of me. It’s really hard for me.
Wanna be my friend?
Hey, I know you wrote this a time ago, but I wanted to tell you this. I wholeheartedly understand you, and I've lived something similar (that part where your mother talks about your good things to other people but never says anything to you really resonated with me). I know right now it seems hopeless, and I'm so sorry you are suffering this much. I just wanted to say that things will get better, I spent my childhood and teenager years feeling like you but now at 24 I'm far from those thoughts. Even if it's hard, keep trying and reach for help (if you feel you don't have anyone, talk to your teachers or look up resources online). If you really really feel like you're alone, please tell me and I'll be here for you. Good luck and be brave, you deserve love and happiness and you will reach them if you hold on a bit more.
When I'm ranked 1 in class and we get our papers my mom would say well done but then say but ih look ur friends handwriting is so pretty but urs looks some one who is drunk
This simple comments can make some one life feel worth less. I work hard so that she has something in me to be proud of but its always nit good enough. Everyone else says I'm great but what about her, what do I need to do to make her proud
Working hard in school and doing too much household choirs and less sleep.. that's also the start of depression, plus your parents dont appreciate things that you do.. it's so heavy it hurts like hell.. then you feel numb eventually and you just want to end all of it.. im tired too.. too tired.
I agree christine. I think that staying indoors and not getting enough fresh air and sunlight can also cause depression. She said she also has knee problems and is in pretty severe pain. That can cause depression as well I think.
I know it's kinda late to respond since this episode has been aired two months ago but it's not a concern to me cuz I did all kind of house chores, babysitting and school works like non-stop cuz I love my ma and I know one day all these good deeds will be paid off soon enough back to me...I have survived a terrible family issues but still I managed to get a hold on something and be stronger each day...I suffered from back pain and swollen feet and I'll just tell myself that I'M A STRONG WOMAN!
@@nasraibrahim9792 lmao you're probably same like her parents so remember not to compare your struggles to your kid's struggles yea
I noticed i get depressing thoughts when I don't get enough sleep so yea and my mood swings are crazy too when i dont get the sleep that i need
@@nasraibrahim9792 everyone deals with things differently and you can't compare them to what you did
I'm so worried about her. She should receive professional help.
13:53 I’m so ready to use this when my parents pull the “When I was your age” card. 😂😂😂
XD
OMG IM DYING 😂😂😂
My dad says” “you know when I was your age...”
The daughter is such a selfless angel
My parents : *dear, can you go to the store to buy some milk?*
Me after doing the chores of the household : *I'm really tired and I can't feel my legs now.*
Them: *did you know how we went to work. We used to walk for 1hour and then jumped over the himalayas then swam the Atlantic ocean then walked to Sahara desert then we arrived to our work.*
Me: *in which country was your was your office?Australia?*
Credits to : preciousjeon
same
@@izkmj i edited it :'D
Hahaha
That's what my grandfather used to say 😂
@@heneedsomemilk562 thanks
I love the way host Lee Young-ja handled this sensitive case. She’s such a sweet, empathic person: a great asset to the show!!! 🤩💝👍💯
uwiblue which one is young ja?
Mee Cee, she’s the show’s hostess that holds the baby @ 18:59
And has a great sense of humour on top.
There are things you should and shouldn’t say when someone is going through depression.
Did you see how JR look at the daughter at the stage while singing for the baby? He had love in his eyes 😊
Unique Chan yes :”)
who is JR?
@@heshanidelange8186 Nu'est leader Jr
Heshani he is called for being national leader in produce101
YES THE ADMIRATION IN HIS EYES WERE SO EVIDENT BUT TBH IF I WAS THERE, I would’ve looked at her the same way that he did. That girl is just so nice and kind and selfless i love her
They took her for granted.....that's the problem
It’s sad how almost every parent has switch the conversation to their life being more harder yet they don’t understand why there son/daughter doesn’t open up about anything :/
As soon as i saw the girls face, i saw the loneliness in her eyes though she is smiling. Poor girl! Me too, i am a lonely type of person. Sometimes i thought of giving up on my life with i don't know what my reason is. I just feel too exhausted and sad. But i find kpop and kdrama that i got to hold on to it and temporarily forget my loneliness.
I'm happy to read that! You should check out SUJU...plug from ELF. They literally add sunshine to my life. One of the members also suffers from depression, and he is pretty open in discussing his struggles. I know they are just celebrities, but I love them.
I love suju too. I admire leeteuk very much. From all the difficulties and struggles he faced in his life, he continues to smile and be his best for his fans.
I'm feeling like that too. Its feels like want to end the life faster cuz i can't handle the difficult situation.
Yes me too. Kpop is my place to find hapiness ;__; i
same here. when i saw the girl's face, i can see my old self when i was struggle with depression. i was lightly smiling but still looking so lonely and empty. her face also looks so pale
If she's been diagnosed I really hope this wonderful girl is getting the support she needs.
I was really shocked when she started describing her depression. It seemed as if she was describing me. Well, i guess i found out that i have depression.
Which is no surprise at all. My mum and dad fight 24/7, school stresses the shit out of me and i have no real good friends and i feel lonely and have suicidal thoughts. When i showed my brother a story i wrote he just said : omg that's so emo.
Nothing else.
They never see or feel how i feel. I always try to keep a straight face and not cry in front of them. When i do, i feel like im a weak person.
Whenever i see good friends im kind of jealous and envious of them. But sometimes when they badmouth each other i wonder if there really can be a REAL friendship.
Im just dissapointed in whole humanity, because it is costing me my sanity. -n.m
Nicole I'm sorry to read that. Is there anyone you can make friends with at school? Can you join a club?
@@dietgardenkittenmiau1996 well...they are all fake. I've seen it so many times. They act nice in front of each other and when the other leaves, the other one starts saying bs.
You sound a lot like me. Sometimes I wished time would stand still so I could breathe. No one understood me. No one took my emotions seriously. Like you, I had friends but I learned early not to rely on them. I had no one but me. My parents had their own issues and stresses. They forgot I was a kid. I didn't know what being an adult was but I was forced to behave like one. My brother and sister had no idea what I was going through. Whenever they did something wrong, I got the punishment. I grew up sad, lonely and angry. After years of trying to figure out why I was so unhappy, a doctor asked me if I was depressed. I was shocked. Depression never occurred to me. Finding that out was the first step to my recovery. The second step was finding the right people to talk to. I feel so much better now and I know you can too. Please find someone to talk to. Don't give up. Find your happiness.
Sorry to hear that. People generally won't ever get to feel what depression feels like, so they're not able to even relate. Either that, or they're so consumed and occupied by their own demons to even be present.
Good friends will laugh when you fall, while holding out a hand to lift you up. Good friends don't badmouth each other. Good friends support each other through thick and thin. Your friends sound toxic tbh, I wouldn't touch them with a 10ft pole.
@@janerm3940 exactly they're occupied about their own things. You only can find who a good person is when you're stressing, but they try to calm you down and just say crap it to their business and pay full attention.
A "friend" of mine says : talk to me about stuff. But when i do, she doesnt even pay attention and just says : mhm, yeah, i see. And looks around.
I really hate it when others compare their own pain with someone and not minding the words they say. It doesn't really matter who suffered the most because in the end, pain is still pain. Even just a simple word like "idiot" etc. can cause pain to someone, thinking that it was just an another "common" or "clićhe" word which is usually use for today's society. But you don't know that it might have affected that person's life and choices in a way. So yeah, still hoping that Hello Counselor cast experts to the program because mental illness (psychological problems) is much deeper than they think, it's not like your typical abcd's.
"I have health problems from my second pregnancy and Im also traumatized about my husband getting sick while my little girl is more of a mother than a sister to her brother... I WILL HAVE ANOTHER BABY"
I can see her lonely eyes but bright smiles.💔
My mom would yell at me for doing a small mistake. For example I drop a bottle cap and she either yells or sighs at me. I'm 14 and this has been a problem ever since I was 10. I'm too scared to speak, because I think I will get yelled at. One time on july 4th my parents were inside while my older brother(19) was outside with me and our cousins watching fireworks. My aunt asked me if I wanted to do sparks, so I walked over to do sparks. The thing is... I thought my older brother was watching my younger brother so I did the sparks. My younger brother was in the back of the truck and he fell. My aunt rushed to him and took him inside. I went to check on him and the first thing that happened to me was that I get yelled at. I tried to speak up by saying "I thought (Older brother) was watching him." But my mom said That I was suppose to watch him.. She called me Useless. I was only 12 at the time. My eyes began to fill with tears and I ran to the guest room and cried. The word useless ran through my head and made me cry even more. That word useless made me think I AM useless. I think that I can never do things right even if i make a mistake. I remember what happened so clearly. I believe I am a useless worthless child. My dad called me worthless and I also cried. Most days I would cry in the middle of the night remembering the events that happened. I have had social anxiety ever since I was 9 and it got worse as I grew up. I don't even think I have Self Esteem and confidence. Its all rough for me a 14 year old being told Useless and worthless. Those two words stuck to me like glue. When I am happy I get scared and believe that I don't deserve happiness because I'm a worthless person. I am positive I have Sleeping problems because I always sleep at 2 to 5 in the morning. Sometimes I think that i don't deserve to live because I'm a headache to my parents. I would play in my head what I would do If i were to ever kill myself... I try telling my parents about my social anxiety but they don't care. They think its like a cold, it will go away. I wish people understood me. My parents don't understand me.
i relate to this a lot. i hope you are able to get help soon and that you wont have to feel this way anymore soon because this is definitely a big concern. i might not know you, but
im here for you :)
I hope u r doing well now.dont let other people bring u down even if it is your parents learn to love yourself more.❣️
I experience that from time to time but only when my parents are frustrated beforehand so I don't know how you feel with being called "useless and worthless" like almost everytime, but I have a friend who has anxiety. Her parents are like yours but she still builds up confidence every now and then to forget about what her parents have said to her. Things like this doesn't need to be gone through by yourself sweetie, sometimes people go through this with others who feel the same or those who understand. If you feel you don't have anyone, you can talk to me or people online (don't tell them where u live tho or any other specific details that can make them find you and DON'T SEND NUDES IF THEY ASK EVEN IF THEY'RE NICE CUZ PEDOS BE EVERYWHERE. IF THEY THREATEN YOU, U MF TELL ME AND ILL WHOOP THEIR ASS and that's on periodt pooh). 😌✌️
It ok. Your not alone if you need someone to talk to we can talk if you like!
I think almost every child can relate to his. Especially my sister always told me that if i keep yelling at her, i would not succeed in life nor have friends and sometimes i would cry thinking about it. I yelled at her for a reason. There is one, i yelled at her because she got mad over me for treating my brother/sister cruelly when both my bro/sis actually was the first one to shout at me sometimes which is impolite in our family to shout at elders. She or my parents would take their side so i just sigh or leave it and kept telling myself its fine but its not and i kept saying i should keep my cries for late, i don't deserve the world, i don't deserve to have feelings or emotions. We all are humans and no one is perfect but they know they made mistake and just never tried to change. Right now I'm speechless, i cannot even talk properly or message people properly because of whatever I'm feeling lately. I hope you understand that so many people love you even if they don't show. Pls tell me that you're fine now
Luckily the mom want to understand her. My mom was never like that. She keep saying that she’s also having a tough time and keep comparing with mine. I know its hard for my mom since she got divorced at 49 years old. But its hard for me too. She lose a husband but my mom tend to forget that i lose a father too. Since they get divorce i never contact my father anymore since my mom doesnt really like it. My father also never try to contact me either. I have 2 younger brother and 1 younger sister to care about. Since i am the only one that can drive in the family besides my mom, i always took the responsibility to drive my younger sister and brother back to their school or hostel eventhough i have a really bad backpain. When my mom get sick, i always make sure the house clean since if i sat at home and just get rest, my mom would scold me. I’m always tired doing house chores but my mom rarely compliment me for doing that . I have no close friends either. I’m so lonely nowadays. Hmmmm
May god bless you :) Be happy.
Aww dont say that U am akways besude you
I hope you’re okay! Thank you for being so hardworking and helping out your mum! You’re doing well! Remember you’re not alone :) and as weird as it is, a stranger from across the world is thinking of you :)
Lets be friends ❤
Same. Except my dad has been abusive and has a girlfriend but they haven't divorced yet. We suffered for so long and I knew it was my mom that suffered more. So I kept quiet for 7 years. Suddenly, as I got older these things during my childhood got to me along with a competitive school and pressure to get good grades. And being an outcast. But when I told my mom I need help finally, she said that I have no reason to be. I love her and she loves me too. And she went through an extremely hard time for so long but she forgets that I was just a kid when I saw all of it
it might be just me but the daughter's eyes were watery/teary during the whole episode.
This episode brought me to tears like the entire audience. Its so sad to hear that she was so burdened and kept so much inside herself.
If the parents would’ve complimented her instead of comparing, I think she would be fine. If cheerleading is what makes her happy, support her :)
This is the first time I feel so related to a story. Till now at 28, when I tell my mom I'm sad n life is tough, she replied the same as the mom, "I have tougher life than you, i dont understand why you keep complaining ". And my dream was the same as the daughter, to have a stable job. This is my greatest regret. I hope I can go to this girl and tell her my experience. Own your life!
This is why I don't talk my problems to my parents because one time when I was like starting to share "I think I am having a hard time" they just laugh then my parents would tell the exact thing such as like " Do you think we are not having a hard time? Do you thing you are suffering more than we do?" Since then I always keep them to myself and make a cover for them not to see whats inside
This family should be proud that they have raised such a kind and amazing daughter. I hope they will continue to raise her well, and hopefully she continue to be as happy as she is after this.
I love how her mom understand that sometimes her daughter was feeling tired emotional and physical. How she's not forcing her to do things because she completely understand her daughter.
Imagine how hard it is to be depressed in a country like Korea. Ugh. It's 2018 already. Can't the elders acknowledge the fact that mental health is important and that people need help??????????? depression is a battlefield and it's impossible to win in just one try. it's a slow and a continuous process, and sometimes it takes years. especially if you're alone through the journey--- that's harder.
it's annoying how parents keep on saying "i've had a harder time than you". Like for the nth time, this isn't a contest of who've had the greater pain/suffering!!!
Imagine being South East asia and having to go thru life like this
@mayomagyo Haha, i relate.
Thats why i moved to Australia
@@mayomagyo6229 yeah I can relate to that sht man
No actually even arabs do that like frequently
This is the first time I never truly blame anyone. I admire the daughter so much. Mom and dad have faults too but I cannot blame them. I can understand her dad's side as the head of the family. He may not be good at expressing himself in words but I can see that he is a pretty calm dad and he works hard for the family. His job can be stressful too. It may be awkward at first but I hope he continues to say what he said at the end to his daughter. I can also understand her mom. It's not easy to give birth at older age and she has sickness too. Her mom is pretty considerate too. That's why she sent her concern for this show. She doesn't want to burden her husband although she ends up relying on her daughter too much. For the middle child, well, he is just a boy being boy. Hopefully soon, when he's older he can be a son the family can rely on. For the daughter, after this show, many people admire you. What a selfless and kind daughter! Love your family but focus more on yourself too.
I started crying when the daughter started crying becuase it must be so hard for her to be with people who dont really understand her :((
This show is in desperate need of a psychiatrist
exactly. its very weird how people see no problem with comedians dealing with other people’s mental health lol.
I agree. I've heard a lot that the people who come are linked to professionals behind the scenes before and after. I don't know how true that is. And before, they only showed doctor advice for other organic issues than mental health.
this show was never made to replace a real psychiatrist or psychologist and it was just a show for fun so of they aint gon have one
Sohyun Pak but people treat it as such. none of these people are qualified enough to give others advice on something as important as child care or mental health. its just not right
@@peemaster123 they know that it's not to replace any professional help, the show also do help people off-camera that you don't see and you can research yourself.
Being the first daughter in asian family is really that hard. Cheer up beautiful🤍 let’s be great together, i pray for you✨
This reminded me when I was 15. I was really depressed and subtly told my mom. Guess what she said? "Stop complaining and just *enjoy* it !"
It felt like she forced me to continuendrink some toxic when I already suffering.
Not to mention they got angry at me because I never smiled or laughed anymore. Come on, I wanted to die, okay? And because I couldnt explain due to their response, they turned manipulative and verbally abusive to me.
Fast forward six years later, I haven't really healed. My pain and healing will come in waves. But... It got better. A little bit better each day, in case one of you reading this is having the same experience.
attacced by jinhwan same
saha ieu l
I never remembered being loved bc my parents wanted a boy. I felt like a disappointment and it is my fault for not being a boy and l felt guilty for it. (During my early teenage years 9-12yo, l tried to act like a boy as a way to feel a tiny bit better XD) my brother was Bron when l was 7and l got in the same situation as this girl. Each time l complain about negative feelings, my mom would tell me how her childhood was harder and l should be happy and stop being a selfish brat. I get yelled at for not smiling too and even now, l find it hard to express love toward ppl l care for. It is awkward, ldk how. My brother is 14, he only household chore he does is walk to the fridge and eat something. I want to die, l told my mom once and she handled me her pain medication and told me a bottle would be enough to kill me. She also said l am so self centered, l dont aknowledge her hardship and l dont deserve to be her daughter and to live. I guess my body is pretty strong coz l swallowed the whole bottle and survived. I tried suicide many times and quit before actually doing it coz l am a weak-willed pussy. I am just hiding all that and pretend l love my family and l love caring for my brother, clean the house and earn money for them. I am secretly starving myself hoping that will kill myself. I starve for so many reasons. It is weird but l somewhat want to live sometime and l starve so l can at least look pretty and get complimented by other ppl for superficial things as looks. I starve because l know ppl are going to treate me better if l am thin (l was humiliated by my own mother so many time because l was chubby when l was a teen). I am craving for the feeling of being liked even l know that if ppl like me for my looks, they don't really like me. I starve to be better at ballet, have more confidence when l play music, to be able to talk to ppl and be more outgoing. I also starve because my brother is severely overweight and the thinner l am, the fatter he looks beside me and it hurts my mother that he is overweight. My extended family makes jokes about him bullying me at home and eat all my food. I enjoyed that, I want him to suffer some of the stuff l endured. I starve because l hope l will die.
@@alice_in_wonderland9997 hey you, are you okay? Sorry for reading this too late and responding too late. Please, they dont deserve your life. Don't take your life, you are showing them that you are weak. Cry if you need to, dont bottle up. Its fine, its totally fine to cry. I used to be in that situation, but nowadays, I just think about what makes me happy. Keep thinking of happy things, do things that makes you happy, and if u cannot stand it anymore, than fight. If you can take a break from the relationship, then go somewhere far. Go away, run from it. Be idle for a while. No matter what you do, do it for the sake of your life. Stop thinking about others. You matter the most. If at all you are reading this, just know that there will always be a person care for you.
@@alice_in_wonderland9997 Not killing yourself isn't weak, it's brave. It shows that you are strong enough to deal with whatever shit people throw your way.
“People are crying in the audience” While I’m crying in my room
I hope she gets better, she’s so lovely
Wow parents who decide to have children later in life dont know how their older children feel. I feel like the parents need to step up their game since they want to have children again they shouldn't rely on their daughter so much. She is at that age where every little thing will set her off.
LOL I bet you 100% it was just an accident. It is actually really hard to keep from having an unwanted pregnancy when you are married and sexually active. They probably thought YAY...she is not fertile...lets get it on...and BAM...baby #3
@@dietgardenkittenmiau1996 ???
@@dietgardenkittenmiau1996 there's something called condoms and other forms of birth control. The woman could've tied her tubes. Honestly. I hate how parents don't think of their other children before deciding to have another baby with that kind of age gap. This includes my parents. I am still very disappointed that they decided to have another kid 12 years later after I was born. I feel like Korean older generations don't like the idea of birth control bc it could mess with you and all, but gosh, just go use it. Or don't have sex at all. It's that simple. I don't like it when parents like those or even my parents don't think of the consequences later on with the other children bc obviously, the other children will feel super burdensome too. I was so angry when my dad said that my sister (who is 12 years younger than me) was born with a golden spoon, meaning that she has everything. Two parents who are happy, an older sister and older brother who got her back, a nice house, parents who could support, a older sister who is to become a doctor, everything a child could ask for a happy family. I was devastated. I really hope that parents are considerate of their other children before having unprotected sex; with a possibility of having another kid. It hurts when your life has to be adjusted just for that kid. If you plan to have another kid, don't look for help from your other kid. It's your responsibility to raise another human being and you made that decision to have sex without a condom. Don't rely on your other kids bc what happens is what that girl goes through. It's a real problem.
When she said "that is my way of dealing with my life" my heart breaks. Teenagers shouldn't have to deal with life, they should live a happy and hopeful life. Sadly a huge amount of people now a days aren't living but surviving. Parents sometimes don't realize what they are saying, and I haven't understand them yet. I mean it is so frustrating. They said pharses like "you can't hate your dad", "my life is harder than yours", "Did you said you are tired? You haven't done anything today"...
I don't even know how to conclude this... This episode make me mad and emotional
sunmi has had one of the hardest childhoods shes so amazing
@Zuala Zo i’m talking about the celebrity!! lshe raised her brothers while training in her preteens (12yr old) cause her family was poor and she didn’t have a mom either her dad was also sick and died three month before her debut
20:18 wow she really IS the "young" mother 😲😲😲😲😲
see how she and her mom react at the SAME time? omg ☹
She's the best daughter/ sister/ firstborn. She's so considerate of her family more than herself. Her parents couldn't even see her sufferings. I think a lot of parents have the same mindset of "when i was at your age..." comparison and that's why they usually thought that their child and also whatever that is.. I honestly hate that..
This girl is so lovely and kind, I just got this feeling that I need to give her a huge hug all the time I see tears in her eyes.
I feel so sorry for her and want her to feel better 'cause she totally deserves it!!
Well, I think it's quite important to spread more loe these days so:
Everyone who is reading this, fell hugged and lots of love from me ♥
I had exactly the same hurge ,i cried my eyes out and i wanted to hug her so much.I felt like i was seeing myself.And the fact that they didn't talk about her suicidal tought that much made me kinda sad.Cause I know that it's not enough for her to feel happy again .that if her parents rely on that day only for her to be happy then all that would have meant nothing.I just want her to be happy again .(sorry i'm not fluent in english 😅)
She is an angel who was sent as a blessing to their parents!! Cherish her❤️
The problem is she is like a mum for the baby and not like a sister the roles switched . And the mother won t have her own role with the baby in the future . Sorry for my poor english .
such a good mom for worrying snd caring.. i know how much of a stigma there is around mental illness in korea..
I understand how she feels. I'm 15 and I was diagnosed with depression two years ago, I truly hope she gets professional help and gets better. ♥️♥️♥️
i relate to her stress so much that i cried practically throughout the whole video, every time i express my pain i get " i suffer too" or "ive been at work all day too" i cry myself to sleep and wake up crying too, no one is aware of so though, they don't ask. I'm also at a point where even words don't mean anything, ive heard them so often and so repeatedly and have said the myself to other people i see struggling that i've sort of become immune to them, there's been probably two times i've snapped the first my dad understood and sympathized and my mum agreed with the issue at the time and the second my mum felt hurt by the words i said and told my sister who then spoke to me about it... which is so unfair to me. anytime anyone has troubles i listen to them wholeheartedly but when i have issues i should keep them to myself because it hurts others? i thought about giving everything up various times, but think the only reason i haven't given up is because i'm religious and i have a fear of what will happen to me if i end it since its against my religion to harm yourself in any way shape or form. al i do now is endure my pain and smile so that others aren't aware if the pain i'm in :)
@@xxamyy33 hi, can’t believe you replied to a two year comment but yeah, nothings really changed other than me getting older it, im not a super confrontational person so sometimes i just feel like i might aswell let it go seem as people won’t really ever change if that makes sense.
i’ve always done that, writing down my feelings i mean, it’s kind of my own therapy session when i know no matter what i say or do won’t change anything. so i open my phone up and write everything i need to and feel while crying then put on some comfort songs or shows/dramas and try to forget everything.
my mum won’t ever understand, no matter how much i express so i kind of gave up on that so i just plan on doing what i have to do securing myself and them moving out.
like i said words and such don’t work on me anymore almost like going one ear and out the other but thanks for commenting that way i can see how much if anything has changed since i last wrote this.
@@suz-2050hi, are you 18 yet? Did you get to move out and be happy?
진짜 너무 착하면 가족들에게도 호구잡힐 때가 있구나.. 지금은 고3이 된 거 같은데 내년이면 빨리 모든 걸 내려놓고 자기의 행복을 위해 독립하기를
i cant even the middle brother's responses are so fking funny 😂😂😂
As a depression patient I both bursted in tears and felt sad for her
I felt the same as another depression patient I wanted to cry.
i think this is the best concern I've ever watch...i can understand the situation they going through...but what i want to tell is i hope that her mom and dad can express their gratitude towards her more often n i know it much easy for woman or mom to express their feeling, but for man or dad,they different, they dont really express their feeling, they rather keep it inside their hearts instead of telling what they feel about, but i believe thier love towards her family never die and always growing day by day ...
for me, the best medicine to cure her illness is to comfort her with nice sincerity words.
18:56, 24:28 aww the way he looks at her❤️
My younger siblings were born when I was 2, 4, 6, 9 and 11 year-old. I remember babysitting the fifth and youngest. I put them to sleep and that usually took I hour, did their laundry, play with them and etc. My parents took their first degrees part-time, and my mom even had the fifth and youngest in those 4 years. Once, I had to take a break from school for two weeks to take care of my baby sister when my parents sit for their exams, since they had no one to rely on taking care of the baby.
Since I had many siblings at a very young age, my parents did not pay much attention to me since they had no choice but to take care of my younger siblings more. I had many thoughts of running away from home since I was tired of taking care of my younger siblings and lack of attention and care from my parents.
I understand this girl's situation. I could see myself in her and all I want is hugging and listening to her.
Isn’t the brother 10 years old? He’s definitely old enough to help out more.
@TheMystery30 only if they are boys, cause girls feels a lot more pressured to do things at home. And not only in Korea, this is everywhere! Moms and dads do a lot more to their boys than to their girls. They always expects the girl will help out at home since an early age. Help doing all types of chores and they end up relieving the boy from doing them. Every country has this. If not every, almost all.
@@juniaoliveira7466 and that's the reason it PISSES ME OFF. Idgaf whether my sibling is a boy or a girl. He or she MUST help out the same way to keep each other and to lean on one another. And honestly, I have (had) the same exact problem. My brother is 2 years younger and my sister is 12 years younger than me. My parents baby my brother way too much; my brother is 19 and he still doesn't know how to cook ramen in a pot. And bc he's clumsy, they think that he's going to set a fire in the house (he's very clumsy sadly) so they relied on me for everything. My dad said once he's dead, I have to take care of my brother. Like hello, go teach your son how to be an adult, that's not my job. I could help, but that's me voluntarily giving up my time so teach him. I did 90 percent of what a dad, husband should do. Being next to the mother, wife, helping raising the kid. It sickens me when they made a mistake of having a third child, and they expect me to help take care of the kid 24/7. My dad said "This is practice for you once you have your kid later." Like wtf? Lol don't assume that I'll have a kid bc no, sorry, I am not about to have kids bc of you. With a kind heart, of course I did help, but that does not mean that it is a must for me. They had sex without a condom and had a kid? That's your responsibility and not mine. I was so disappointed in my parents and I still am. I was ashamed of my parents because I felt like I didn't get a say in them having another kid because I knew they were going to rely on me and not on my brother to help raise this kid. I will one day tell them when they're much older. But man, the scar never goes away.. God bless this girl. She deserves the best in life.
@@윤민경-n8i I experienced almost the same thing, but my brother, instead, is 5 years older and have a son. Guess who makes good for the little guy? My brother doesn't even know how to cook rice! When we were younger he could do everything he wanted, but when I wanted to do the same, I was never allowed. The excuse was: he is a boy. I learned how to do everything in a house, while he was going out and having fun with friends. When he got a gf, she could sleep in my house with him, and when I got a bf, I couldn't even sleep in the same room, the excuse was, again, he is a boy and you are a girl!
This sickens every girl, and sadly some of them pass this through life, for their children. We have to give the same education to our children, the gender is not an excuse.
@@juniaoliveira7466 amen sister. Man.. I'm sorry you had to go through that! It must've really made you angry and upset because the thing they used against you was that you were a girl. I just hope that after our parents generation passes, that no parents teaches their kids things based on gender or strict 1950s culture. It's just ridiculous.
@@윤민경-n8i I don't know if you believe in God, but I hope God hear you. Let's give the best education to the next generations! We girls can change the world, it starts with our closest younger ones. Hope life gets better for you, and for all of us.
i know it's too late to say this but honestly.....the parents didn't consider their daughter at all when they had a third child. parents need to make sure that their elder children are ready to have a sibling. it's preparation for EVERYONE, down to pets. i feel like it was incredibly insensitive to have a third child (with such a huge age gap) and except their children to help raise that child. people...please think super duper carefully about kids omfg
That's how I think of my parents and any other couples too. Please f-ing think before doing anything because it's so much stress for the kids too. Not only the parents, KIDS. TOO. If only they thought it through instead of rushing it inserting that into the other end. It's so sad.
The youngest one was an accident, they say that on the video
@@tomasiamarques4424 abortion is. A solution
I really think she's beautiful.I love her smile and her eye smileees
This one honestly mad me she’d tears because I can relate to her, I’ve always tried to put others feelings and priorities before mine which always resulted in me suffering because I never took the time for my self and try to relieve all the Stress I have endured. She is honestly a strong young girl.
Me: Mom i have depression.
Mom: cause you play phone to much! You don't go to church! You're lazy! You only say "yes" and not actually doing it!
🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃
“I’m afraid she’ll lose fans if she speaks up”
This one really was hard to watch, seeing how upset and seeing he’s dad act like that, OOO I WANTED TO PUNCH HIM UNTIL HE FINALLY UNDERSTOOD.
Why people always said that they cant express their love? Just try it. It will make you more happy
I love you
^^Love you guys
Lol. I love you too 😆😆
LOVE YOU ALL
Because they find it too cringy? Orr maybe because they feel ewtremely ridiculous when they do?
ngl i started crying when i heard the daughter she's so sweet and considering, i could relate a bit too and it really hurt, i hope she's doing better now
She is precious. She is so concerned about her mom and dad and thinking already to support them😭😭
The word "I love you" from your parents is the most thing that the children would love to hear, it might seems so cheesy and awkward for some parent to say that to their children, but with that one word can comfort your child. I lost my dad when I was 8y/o, and its been 11 years after that day. The most thing that I remembered he left me with is, he said "I love you my daughter"... I still remembered that clearly, as you guys know, sometimes our childhood memories might be blurr and we can't remember everything but I could remember that simple moment. "I love you" is like a magic word that people can remember it clearly🤍
This girl is amazing, I think we the same age, you so strong girl! I already watch it 2 times 2 years ago and this year but I still cried😭... girl I know how you feel, hope you doing well now!!!
This show does a whole lot more better job at counseling than my school does for their students a friend of mines said the counselors are even hard of understanding and very judgmental so when i showed her this program she loved it even though she isnt into k culture with the subtitles on these videos she watches alot of their episodes and wish if she had a chance to go on the show one day she'll gladly take it. I learn from this show too to try to be there for her because I don't have such a hard time anymore unlike her so thanks to the hello counselor team 💜 i purple you guys