Ask Wendy: Should You Ever Date a Guy with Kids?
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- Опубликовано: 14 окт 2024
- What happens when your 22 year old daughter is dating a 38 year old guy who has a 13 year old daughter and baby mama drama? You ASK WENDY for help.
Find out what advice Wendy offers a concerned mom and her young daughter.
Then, Wendy gives advice on how to deal with an emotionally needy and negative friend.
any age is too young to be taking care of and/or dealing with someone elses kids.
OMG, thank you.
True
Exactly
Right
I agree! At 22 she does NOT need to be with a man with that kind of baggage.
Yes your right Wendy single people should not date guys or women with kids. Extra unnecessary baggage.
George Chachati 🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬
Exactly
Depends on the kids too to be fair. Just because theyre kids doesn't mean you like them. Some kids are assholes
Ohh to be 22 again! So young and full of promise! I hope she has moved on and focused on building her career or something more solid than being a stepmom at such a young age!
Women and men with kids have less value. Unless it's an even playing field. No one wants to deal with baggage PERIOD
I agree.
Jojo Stanzz exactly my point with my ex sister-In- law...... she has two kids with my brother but cheated on him with a man with 6 kids with 3 different women plus he have a grandson😕 I feel like that is to much for her she has 2 kids and 1 BD, I feel like she to get with somebody who have 2 kids and 1 BM.
Yeah, it hurts but it’s objectively true :/
Thank you!
She is TOO young to be dating that old man!! I say do not date a man with a child, it brings drama such as that baby mama. Exactly like Wendy said," if you don't have kids, date a kid-less man"...MY MOTTO
b3ttyboop08 Agree especially at that age. seems like she will be making unfair sacrifices.
Ladies wendy is right. My mom married my dad at 25 and he had a child and i had to grow up w a brother that hated my mom and my dad being on child support. Its not cute. It really sucked and im one of the kids! So just imagine what we had to go through. It was so much drama. I dont have kids therefore i do not date men w kids. Most of them are broke and have drama anyway. Not all! But a lot of them do.
A childless person entering a relationship with a person with kids, it creates an off-balance dynamic. You have to build a solid relationship with multiple people, meanwhile the other person won't be fully invested in building the relationship because of the child. Plus you're talking about putting children into the picture of a relationship right off the bat, and that is way too soon
Anonymous User Well said!
Wow I'm in the same situation and 37 year old man is after me and I'm 22..he has 5 kids...and he just doesn't get that he's too damn old for me..smh..she should really leave that alone.
Age isn't even the biggest issue, 5 kids? Run.. Im 22 as well and I could NEVER see myself dating a guy with kids at this age let alone 5. He needs to focus on his kids and stop chasing young women.
Aww thanks trollop!!! I get that a lot 😂 lol
+Rashon ShonMuzik Williams WOW I hope you didn't end up dating him!!! You are too young free and fun for that
Block him
@Cherry Blossom Happiness right
im in your daughters position and we got married but DONT DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
bellamia126 why not?
bellamia126 lol
Why not? I agree but I want to know the reason !
bellamia126
bellamia126: How many people told you to break up with him?
I do agree with Wendy that a young female shouldn't date a man with kids. But I also have to say it is ridiculously hard especially nowadays to find a GOOD man without some sort of "baggage" .. I recall recently dating a man with 2 kids, 2 different mothers. He was a nice guy, it was so unfortunate I had to run into the other direction FAST after i learned of his circumstances. Pickings are really slim for us young, ambitious, and educated females out here.
Gurldmndz1: He would have made one of his baby mama's an honest women if he was a "nice" guy. You were dealing with his "nice" representative.
Estella Butler PREACH
And the pickings are very low for us educated, ambitious, and level-headed men when looking for stand-up accountable women without physical or emotional baggage, and who doesn't continuously play the "victim" card while engaging in double-standards.
pickings are slim even at 40
I like her advice.
I completely agree with this advice. At first I would have thought why not? The parent deserves love, however I now know why. My partner has a child and if you are childless it is a nightmare. You are never seen as important enough, one example being when I have achieved something through my uni course, he will never congratulate me and only acknowledges what achievements he has.... His child. I wish someone had told me before how hard it would be. I feel alone, have no support in my life and everything is about them. Take Wendy's advice, you deserve a well respected equal relationship, not a one sided one.
Girl leave 😂💯 It’s never too late. Especially if the bad outweighs the good.
@@grey3083 I did thank Goodness.... 😅 Finally came to my senses last Christmas :D
What does she mean a "Woman," who has no children, should not date a Man, younger or older, who has kids? Does that apply to women, or all young people in their 20's with no children. I am in my early 20's with no kids and I would prefer not to date someone who has kids, but in this day and age you get people in their 20's and younger popping out babies like rabbits.
The fact is if the man was 23 and you were 38 he would not be dating you! So why play house with kids that are not even yours!
Tamara Laird you look like Vanessa from the Bernie Mac show
But yet when MGTOW suggest men do the same thing they're shamed and called selfish?
U'mmm... now what's wrong with this picture?
Hell yea why when mgtow says it it's all bad, but when Wendy says it it's ok double standards are real
@@ascotthumphrey the only problem I have with MGTOW is the pump and dump motto. Its nasty and just stay away from girls in general.
Shaynee are one night stands gross?
I dated a guy when I was 20 yrs old and he was 32 yrs old with 3 kids. It was a nightmare and I'm 31 yrs old now still childless
@Blue Finally Gets A Clue Old Dudes...lol Tom Cruise, Keanue Reeves in their 50's look like 20s, Men don't Age...Women Do, we're not reliving our youths...We as Men even in our 40's or 50's can get a Girl in their 20's while Old Hags can't get a Young guy to date unless that Lady is a Sugar Mama
@@MaxLoopTV tell that to your increasing forehead
MaxLoopTV you are delusional !!!!
MaxLoopTV they are celebrities and they don’t look in their 20s... you need a dose of reality
@@MaxLoopTV LOL lil guy over here thinks he has what it takes 😂
She’s been with that old dude with a teen daughter since she’s been 19!? Insane why you and the child are about the same age
@Cherry Blossom Happiness i wouldnt say thats a pedophile but its definitely a little weird.
@@iskdude9922 agree, it's weird that a grown man would go for a girl in her late teen. Too young, to easy to impress he's more emotionally mature, that's a red flag
Women without children are better off staying away from single men with kids
Agreed!
True
22 and 38 too much baggage 😑
She shouldn't be dating him because she needs to live her life
Excellent advise for the 22 yr. old with the 38 yr. old with kids. Thanks Wendy!!
I love this yellow outfit!!
Wise lady. Gives reasonable and real good advice
I appreciate the level ground we are standing on. No double standard- a good step toward equality and people are calling it how it is.
I just went on a date with a guy (unfortunately a coworker of mine, don't crap where you eat!) who seemed to like me A LOT and he seems so sweet, but he has a child with another woman who lives in a different state.
He's 38 and I'm 25, I have no children and really am not looking for that mama drama.
The age gap doesn't bother me, in fact, I like how much older he is than me. But that baby is definitely baggage. I feel bad because he set up so many date ideas with me and now I have to shut him down. :(
Cherry Blossom Happiness i agree! You have to look past a lot of things to see who these baby daddies really are. Before its too late and you’re the next woman with a child by him. So many females learn the hard way.
Maybe he was taken to the cleaners by his ex wife/gf looking for child support and he had no say in his responsibility with his child after all man rarely have any say in today's society.
Never date a guy with kids.
Idc I just feel dating a single parent as a childless person will never be worth it to me. You will always be a afterthought. You have to deal with their ex & a kid that will probably be bratty with you, you’re expected to help to some extent, but can’t discipline. Nope, I want my own family. I’m way good.
Can you imagine spending your life with someone and ALWAYS being an afterthought? I've seen that play out, and it's honestly just sad. You can see the step parent is like a lifeless husk after awhile. These single parents drain the life from you.
@@austind4301 sadly my friend is playing house with her boyfriends kid, she takes off work to watch his kid, she’s dealing with baby momma drama already got into a fight with her and her family members. The ex girlfriend/ baby mom is trying to take the kid away from the dad and my friend is putting money up for him to get rights 🤦🏽♀️
@@shutit4024 it’s sad, isn’t it? They suck women right up into their messy lives, chew them up, then spit them out. Your friend is seeing everything with rose tinted glasses, but once everything crashes down around her, she’ll sadly see all the stuff that should have made her run for the hills 😕
But its hard to find a man without kids now a days they all have baby moms
Its hard to find women without kids these days they all have baby daddies
alluringblackB Well I'm 23 and I don't have kids.
Raul Gutierrez I’m 46 and no kids. Divorced for 15 years.
I don't know why a young man would want to date some older woman with kids? Why would he want to ruin his life like that? So I totally agree with Wendy. Single moms are pretty much un-datable IMO.
I wonder what she'd say if the roles were reversed. If a guy was dating a single mom?
I was wondering about that
sidharth chand I would give him the same advice! That's a mess !
Matthew Lebreton Totally... so much double the standard, yes?
sidharth chand hopefully the same thing. Dating a single mom is actually worse.
I could imagine she would say something like "your already apart of that child's life you can't abandon it after being in it life for the last 3 years so step up and be a man".
I completely agree with Wendy's advice to the girl about her friend. A true friend may be out of sorts at times, but if they're constantly acting/responding a certain way, they are aware of their actions. If her friend is talking about her monetary troubles and has nothing positive to say about the situation of others,she may be jealous and that will lead to nothing good.Specifically mentioning bills on a regular basis may be her hinting around that she wants help with them,also not a good sign.
I think most friends are liabilities...just snip the fat and hold onto the ones that are true, loyal and real with you.
That’s Wright men with kids is baggage if it didn’t workout with the babymother it’s not with the girlfriend
Just like men are not obligated to date women with kids
then the same should be said about women with kids. I don't want to hear anything about men being selfish whom feels that way
I'm a woman and I 100% agree. I think we are all responsible for the outcomes of our lives, and if you don't envision your life with children then don't date people who have kids. Simple as that.
@@laceyenglish6702 Great! Then tell your double-standards practicing peers that because women don't seem to get the memo.
She never said the mother wasn't in the childrens lives. And if the man cares enough about you he would take 100% custody and you can then adopt those children and be their MOTHER. Little girls out here need to stop playing house with another mans kids. He is going to leave you in a few years. Enjoy your youth and date men that are wealthy without children.
Sounds like Golddigging to me.
Yea but I want to hear you say the same thing for a man dating a woman with kids
Idk if that young girl loves him or not , but she absolutely has to leave him . I am sure that he will ruin her life and will make her responsible for anything happens to his child
not taking care of somebody else's brat
Wendy sounds like she just meant well and went thru enough in life to know what's best. I'd give her that.
thts disgusting ...he is old enough to be your dad ewww
I've been watching these Ask Wendy videos for a couple of days now. Gosh, it's addictive.
the ask Wendy segments are too short
wendy looks like she could be in Coming to America movie lol
Let's stop calling children baggage. They didn't ask to be here. I decided not to have them but its uncomfortable hearing people refer to children as such.
It is what it is, someone else’s children isn’t really a prize either. It doesn’t have to make you comfortable.
I'm a child of a single parent who used to think like you when I was younger. What I have learned is what Zyra just said. Most people only care about themselves men or women. My mom was definitely selfish but so was my dad and so were the people they dated. I am ultimately the same and I know that I could never care for another persons kids the way I could care for my own biological kids. I suspect it is the same with other people. People are ultimately out for themselves first and foremost. Expecting people to be better then they are is delusional in this day and age especially not to mention dangerous. Trust no one except yourself and maybe God because at the end of the day you really don't have anything else besides that.
its true your young free with out kids why date someone with children and older than you your only going to get hassle from his baby mother and the men they go back and sleep with the mother
as my brother from a mans point of view said to me once''why does every girl think she's so special''
Wendy is on point!
Agree with Wendy.
YOU LOOKED FABULOUS WENDY!
more style like this!
It's easier for a gal to date a man with kids because they hardly are present like the mothers are. I'm glad I don't have that baggage problem
What if a girl was 25yrs old an the guy was 35? Too me age is just a number, it really depends on how much you care for him an his children, everyone deserves a chance in life, kids or no kids. We are all human!there is enough negativity going around the world nowadays,let’s just have hope that it is possible and if it doesn’t turn out right?then it’s not meant to be..p.s take it as a lesson learnt.
Great advice....don't do it to yourself.
that yellow dress looks so good on Wendy
as for dating a person who has children, my fiance is a father. I myself have 2from prior involvements. it happens .my man and I are in our mid thirties. now it's hard to find anyone who doesn't have children.my man at least doesn't have a lot of baby mama's. nor do I have tons of baby daddies.if you click with the person, are both of legal age, and are in no way trying to replace the absentee parents, go for it.
She meant childless people should be with childless people. You have kids and so does he - fair
I’ve been dating a guy for about 4 months I’m 22 he’s 33 with 2 kids by 2 different women… in the beginning I let it be known I wasn’t sure bc of that but we spent more and more time together and got really close. After one of his bm have now called me out my name for no reason, I’ve gotten disrespected multiple times, have to teach him things about raising his OWN kids, he sits and plays the game all day, he drinks lean ect…. I realize I deserve WAY better! I’m 22, about to be a flight attendant, in school AND an upcoming r&b artist with NO children. It’s not that I think I’m better but I just don’t picture myself being a 3rd bm… it’s so hard to leave cause he’s a good person but I gotta go…
before breaking up with a friend like that you should at least warn them/let them know how much their attitude is affecting you or else it just looks like you're dropping them out of now where and they never learn. I know from experience unfortunately!
For me, i think its not wrong/bad dating a man with a child, as long as the guy is divorce and he is raising her child in the best way he can for the child to grow respectful and beautiful in every way. Being with someone older than you is not always about money.. love has no age, so long you are with the right man who wont cheat on you or do anything bad. No one has the right to judge.
It just makes me wonder. So does a man with a kid have less value?
Such a great question.
+LegendarySuperstar that is bullshit, shes 22 not freakin 12 and hes 38 not 58, this agist stuff is boring and people who nazify themselves into giving nasty advice like Wendy-house does, shouldn't have a tv show... people have been marrying with much larger age gaps since time immemorial.... what a joke you people are.
Yes
Well a woman with kids has less value so maybe a man does too
Yes both have less value unless there on equal playing field. No one wants or needs baggage.
I bet that Wendy doesn't know how to deal with her own problems?
Yemeni Proud she doesn't. Smh
Wendy was born a man.
That is actually some great advice, and its kind of crazy how that 22 year old is with that older man and sshe does'nt even love him, its like she just embarrased herself, cause shes been with him for three years,,,its crazy people are #crazy
Good advice Wendy !
you better preach on it Wendy!
Wendy gives the best advice. That helped me out too. Thanks Wendy!!
Wendys spoken about woman dating way older men when the woman is in the early 20s shes TOTALLY against it. her response to their question didnt surprise me
I pray Wendy that you read the comments if possible but I just want to say that even tho I'm down to 3 REAL FRIENDS + Associates(party invites) lol I am so happy with a PEACE OF MIND and that's FREE!!! I will be getting your book this weekend.
Ok so she telling women do not be a wife to men with kids, since that is the case men, dont marry women with children as well🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔
Aww Wendy I wish you were here for me to give me advice!
I love that dress Wendy!!!!
Wendys look at 0:58 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
that's some solid advice from wendy
Loving you hair Wendy!
That Yellow is EVERYTHING on you Mz. Wendy......
oh but guys can date girls with kids?? double standard right there
Yep! Because a woman can do no wrong in this country.
RUN!!!
I love what Wendy say omg yes
Wow Wendy gives actually really good advices
OMG! How can you just drop a friend like that?! I understand what Wendy is saying but that is like breaking up with a boyfriend/girlfriend who is going through hard times because they are getting on your nerves. They need support! Friends should not only be there through the good times, but also the bad times also.
depends on friend. if they are a good friend otherwise then give them a chance to change if not then just move on. no need for drama
GREAT Advice on both / all three scenarios!
Im 20 he is 33.. no kids..good looking...just started his own company...he is a manager in a loan company...currently studying (MBA). He wants to marry me..too good to be true right?!
@Blue Finally Gets A Clue Who hurt you maybe fix yourself first look in the mirror and better yourself so you can find someone who would want to be with you.
Ms Wendy is SNATCHED!!!! :)
Wendy looks really, really nice . the hair, that dress.. U go Girl !
Cute dress Wendy!! :D
Great advice, I know some guys looking for a young s##@t, and save on a babysitter. Not fair for the girl. Just saying :)
😥...looking for someone to babysit their kids..Ok now you gonna make me leave my man who is single dad...
Wendy looks bomb in that yellow dress😍😍😍😍
I guess everyones different... I dated a guy who was 32 and I was 19 we got a long great and his little boy (4) was precious and it was a great relationship while it lasted and now we're great friends it only ended because I got to busy to commit to a relationship. Age differences and children in the picture doesn't mean the relationship can't be awesome.
You're entitled to your opinion. I don't see why having a better connection to older people makes me stupid or have low self-esteem.
Okay whatever you say.
well said ... i think dating a much older guy is the most loving thing
I think it's 100% fine, people can be really judgmental and stupid about stuff like this. As long as you're happy w him.
+juliano farmer yea if you have daddy issues and want a daddy
But if a guy drops a girl with kids that wrong? Wth im confused. Encourage a man to date a female with kids but for a female to datr a man with kids is wrong? Wtf
Then...
If a older woman has a boy toy its cool but if a man dates a younger girl its wrong? WTF
My boy toy is 30 and I am 44..He is a single dad and I am uncomfortable with that. He wants us to move together but it's just too much..I can't do it..He has two children..
@Cherry Blossom Happiness But if a man rejects a woman because she has kids, then he is chastised.
@Cherry Blossom Happiness If the man does not take care of his children is not the topic, but that of course is yet another notion of hypocrisy with feminism. Women benefit from adaption, abortion, safe haven law and no one can ever force a woman into parenthood. Yet, men get forced into parenthood perpetually. Oddly, when a man cant or has no desire to care/pay for his kids, then he is labeled deadbeat, pig, dog... the list goes on. Janet Bloomfield discusses this topic in this short video ruclips.net/video/SEt9aQANO-E/видео.html
And, no, what I write is accurate, I cannot count how many times I have been or seen a man get ridiculed for having no desire to date single moms. Men get called: Shallow, not man enough, selfish, etc. Stay in your own lane.
So you rather to have a child without a mother that is caring for them than a person caring for a child
Wendy you look AMAZING in that dress!!! Love love love!!!
Wendy, You are wearing that dress and your hair is gorgeous!
Happy Easter.
BANGING BODY!
SHEESH, Wendy!
When you goin' let us regular folks get a squeeze?
Which of her books is Wendy talking about here?
Wendy looks nice
yea just probably didn't wanna mess up so she was careful in speaking
Wendy, looks great! Love her advice.
No don’t do it if you’re young!
Idk if Wendy's advice is on point or these stories are just pathetic. This is my favorite part of the show.
wendy is letting us have it in that yellow dress. Im headed to the gym now lol love it.
I’m struggling with the problem of the first girl
Wendy you look fabulous!!!
Good advice, Wendy looks amazing
What good advice from miss Wen DAY ! and yes that dress is serving
I miss this Wendy🙁
yellow dress is the best dress wendy wears ever! and i want it if any one know where can i order