How the f did yoh find it 47 min ago??m Found it 15min ago and didnt see any other comments about it before me. Was here when video was posted 30 sec. Damn lol
What comes to mind from this story would be training a guy for months to fight someone just for the fight to start and that guy you trained for months throws a month and misses badly and knocks himself out in the process of missing badly.
I feel bad for the guy in charge. He took one look and knew in his heart of hearts that this was a fool's errand. And I feel like the captain of the Kamchatka was just not pleased to be on this mission in the first place, and acted on that frustration by trolling the Admiral.
They need to make a movie on this voyage and market it as a comedy and then when the credits roll and it says, "based on a true story" people will google it then freak out to find out its all true.
The even stranger irony of this story is that New Zealand and Australia were so worried about the Russian fleet coming down into the Pacific they commissioned a series of coastal forts guarding the main harbors. These forts consisting of 6 & 8 in Armstrong disappearing guns were not completed until after the Russian fleet had been beaten never fired a shot in anger. Two of the forts still exist to this day with one still in firing condition although it has not been fired since the 1950's due to an Albatross colony taking up residence.
This is the third time I've watched this episode. I don't think I've ever laughed as much, watching short vids. 😂😂😂 It's definitely my favorite! Thanks, MrBallen! ❤❤❤❤❤
@@huntermckee2279 its even more funny when you realize Kamchatka was 5 miles ahead of them so all of his screams weren't heard...unless you were on the same ship as him. I would've personally had them all hung😂 can't hit a damn fishing boat yet when they get the ok to fire a shot in salute to a fallen comrade they use a live round and hit one of their own ships😂😂😂
His own men psychologically broke him to the point he was just angrily screaming at Kamchatka on a nightly basis, I understand his pain on a spiritual level
😂 dido 👋 I can’t even leave the house without anxiety of Karen I faced armed men at night in Baghdad but I’m scared to go in Walmart and won’t if the parking lot has more then a qt full
"Do you see Japanese torpedo boats?" Is easily the best part of this story. Followed by him screaming at them for it everynight. This is The Office of maritime incidents
I tend to space out a lot at times thinking of random things so naturally my wife always ask what am I thinking about. "Do you see Japanese torpedo boats" will forever be my reply and we live in Phoenix AZ 🤣🤣🤣 I'm already cracking up thinking about it ☠
Order now and get a second monster for just 19.99 shipping and handling!!! It slices, it dices, it keeps the neighbor's kids in their own damn yard!!!!
NOW I UNDERSTAND WHY THEY NAMED THAT VODKA KAMCHATKA! That boat was full on ripped the whole time. Morning shift change at helm: Where is the fleet? Groan: No idea, dont worry, theyll catch up.
It doesnt matter wether you watch a video from 3 years or 3 days ago, this guys story telling is absolutely top notch.you absolutely deserve all the success you have had man, i only hope for you to get even bigger.hes got the secret sauce, guard it like krabs gaurding the krabby patty recipe haha
With friends like komchatka, you don’t need any enemies 😂😂😂. How this one single ship managed to almost get into war with 4 other countries is beyond me.
But you know how today's culture is. They were trying their hardest so they get a trophy for participation regardless........................................They really do.
@@AmbroseBurnside1824 You misread that. @A_Boogeyperson wasn't saying all sailors were hicks. @A_Boogeyperson was saying the Russian sailors involved were all hicks.
Seriously. I'm sure he's only picking and choosing the interesting bits and I shouldn't judge when I've never experienced anything like it, but how incompetent do you have to be.
I bet the hospital boat crew were so pleased with themselves for not mistaking a fishing boat for a Japanese torpedo boat, for once in their godforsaken lives. "HEYYYYYYY WE DID IT WE LEARNED TO TELL DIFFERENCE!"
The way John is telling the story and how amused he is by the issues makes this hysterical story even better. This definitely should be made into a movie
The russians are famouse for their bad aquipment. In the second world war their tanks would just explode on any impact, while the germans were way advanced.. But the russians just kept bringhing more people.. Milions to spare
this story is absolutely made up, I have no idea what clown made this up, but with all respect to my man John, he should chose sources more carefull. because this IS extrimely ridiculous and nukes trust to his other videos being fact driven
Happiness is coming across a MrBallen video that I've "supposedly" watched, but don't remember a thing about. So it's like a brand new video! I gotta start going through the old videos again.
Man...I don't know if this beats America's Willy Dee story or not. It definitely comes closer to matching the stupidity than I thought any story could.
Honestly, that is just insane. They frequently mistook other vessels as Japanese torpedo boats, then mistook the only Japanese Torpedo boat as a Russian Fishing boat. You couldn't make this stuff up.
How the fuck did they think they could over take the Japanese? I can't believe how ignorant Russia truly was. They couldn't even make it out of the harbor without having an accident.
@Rick Kivari This was before the Bolsheviks' took over. The communist took over Russia in 1917. The Czar mentioned in this story was murdered, along with his entire family, once the Bolsheviks' reign of terror began.
@@brandonrichey8420 Point was to recapture Port Arthur along with land forces, not to take over Japan. But their army was incredibly under prepared for a war on that scale as well, and things would just get marginally better a couple of decades later after their Civil War. Trotsky was a psychopath but what he managed to do with the Russian army during the Civil War (put it ALMOST to Western standards in abput 2 years) was a fricking miracle.
It didnt happen once either. XD If I was on that fleet, I would definitely not want to be on the boat known for messing everything up. XD that crew sounds like a mess.
😅 I know!! Until the end I was laughing because i thought they can't really be that dumb. I am surprised they lasted 7 months. This could be the most impossibly ridiculous factual story I've ever heard.
I like how Britain considering war for the fishing boat incident was essentially "No one could be that stupid for the ships to look like torpedo boats."
They attacked everything: Fishing boats, friendly navies etc. right off the bat, except the Japanese. I can't imagine what the admiral was going thought.
They talked to each other and had a conversation despite speaking two different languages? It obviously never happened like this. As bad as Russians have always been at war, this story is clearly heavily embellished.
I died so hard when you said “ the captain would climb to the top of the ship to yell obscenities at the komchatzka” this needs to be made into a comesy movie.
"ENOUGH is ENOUGH!!! I HAVE HAD IT WITH THESE MOTHERFUCKING SNAKES ON THIS MOTHERFUCKING - Wait, is that a Japanese torpedo boat?!!" "Sir, that's a seagull." "SINK IT!!!"
First it was the poisonous snakes and crocodiles, than the imported cigarettes that were laced with opium were introduced. I would've killed myself if I had to be in charge of people who were stupid enough to get fishing boats mixed up with torpedo boats. And the one time they do come across a Japanese torpedo boat they get it mixed up with a fishing boat
Frankly I'm surprised the Admiral didn't just point at Komchatka, scream "Japanese torpedo boat!" and let the rest of the fleet solve the root cause of all his problems themselves.
Well purposely blowing up the repair ship of the fleet would probably not have done them much good, although if it makes you feel any better the Crapchatka isn't one of the ships that survived the battle with the Japanese so they payed for their stupidity
Oh my God, I love this. I'm laughing so bad. Thank you for sharing these stories the way you do; you've positively impacted so many lives, including mine!
During the entire trip, Admiral Rozhestvensky must've been like "How the hell will I fight a Japanese fleet when my fleet is already defeating itself without any help from the enemy".
I just love how MrBallen couldn't keep a straight face and was actively repressing laughter throughout most of the video. I was howling at "Do you see Japanese torpedo boats?" 🤣
They mistake numerous fishing vessels for Japanese torpedo boats, then encounter a Japanese torpedo boat, “ohhhhh you, you’re not gonna fool me again, I know you’re a Russian fishing boat!!!”
I don’t know why but I’m sitting in my work truck watching RUclips videos in a WAWA parking lot at 645 pm and I guess I just don’t want to go home yet and have to start repiping my main house drain in my basement that started to leak along the whole bottom of the 55 ft run of cast iron on my concrete basement floor, not a hole in a few spots or a large crack that’s 3 ft long the whole run of exposed 80 year old extra heavy cast iron leaks everywhere along the bottom of the pipe, that’s really quite normal with all the soilds that don’t get washed away when you use a fixture that isn’t dumping enough water along with the waste it ends up sitting on the bottom of the pipe eating away at the cast iron until it’s paper thin and starts to leak , but back to this video I watched this video and found your comment and haven’t laughed that hard in five years so thank you I needed that .
@@mrbig4532 I'm so sorry for the troubles you're currently going through. I hope everything works out in the end! I learned some valuable stuff through your comment though so thank you for sharing 👍. And what a wholesome ending your comment had, that was so sweet❣God bless you!!
@@LetsGoFlyers2011 alright give me a break I’m busting my ass , I’ll get it done . If only I didn’t go out last night to 3am and didn’t get so drunk that I can remember parking my car because one of the girls who I gave a ride to threw up when I was backing into a parking spot that I swore was large enough for my car to fit but something tells me when I finally find the area where I parked my car I’m going to find some rear passenger side damage.
Just imagine the SEAL team equivalent back then swimming in the water just watching it happen sitting on the back of blue whales cause even the whales just stay put. The Subs were like old people on the road with Boomers and Millennials lol
“Admiral, we seem to have lost contact with the Kamchatka” “Oh thank God, carry on” *Baltic Fleet arrives at port* “Admiral the Kamchatka has arrived at this port, they are no longer lost” “FUCK”
I keep re-watching this video at least once a week. No matter how big of a mess your life might be in it will pale in comparison to this episode of the three stooges.
Do you also tell your husbands deepest secrets to their friends (ex-girlfriends) while visiting their area together? I mean that would be pretty funny too, but I think that ends everything and probably won't make it to a RUclips comment, so I'd just stick to the cute stuff
@@joeboccard5603 It was funny in my head at the time, not so much in text. Just going to the next extreme from a cute quote/in joke to an extreme in joke that would ruin a relationship. That's all. it's not even that funny to me any more, too much to it,
This story was too much 🤣🤣🤣. They decided to boost morale by buying pets, but the pets turned out to be Crocodiles and Poisonous Snakes. That killed me.
This is kind of relevant, Poland had a bear mascot in ww2. His name was Wotjek, he enjoyed beer and cigarettes and would carry ammo crates back and forth for the troops. That being said at least he wasnt poisonous
No big deal but.. You mean 'venomous snakes'. They can kill you by biting you. For a poisonous snake to kill you YOU would have to eat IT. It's a 'pet peeve' of mine.
![Gucci Mane & Sexyy Red - You Don't Love Me [Official Music Video]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/j7IBqyFKT4c/mqdefault.jpg)
Hello my fellow friends who love scary videos like me 😎❤️ edit: Mr bean on a ship 9:13
Well done!!!!
Isa very nioce
How the f did yoh find it 47 min ago??m
Found it 15min ago and didnt see any other comments about it before me.
Was here when video was posted 30 sec.
Damn lol
TY IM A HUGE FAN ❤️
Next time i wont listen to story first and then look lol
This is literally a personification of
“you had one job”
exactly
What comes to mind from this story would be training a guy for months to fight someone just for the fight to start and that guy you trained for months throws a month and misses badly and knocks himself out in the process of missing badly.
I feel bad for the guy in charge. He took one look and knew in his heart of hearts that this was a fool's errand.
And I feel like the captain of the Kamchatka was just not pleased to be on this mission in the first place, and acted on that frustration by trolling the Admiral.
or "I'm surrounded by Idiots!"
Lol
"I'm surrounded by idiots!"
-Rozhestvensky probably
"I thought u were surrounded by cotton candy gummy bears" probably one of his sunburnet
Probably haha
The captain - 'I am ruled by an inbred idiot who has zero experience at doing anything.'
Most likely
He was probably so happy to be taken prisoner. And probably asked if he could stay. "Don't send me back, whatever you do don't send me back!"
Disclaimer: No Japanese torpedo boats were harmed in the making of this story.
The irony 😅😅✋
😄😄
🤣🤣🤣🤣
🤣 you killed me. 💀
That's gold
One of my favorite parts about this story is how the perpetually-composed John Ballen is struggling to keep from laughing.
lmao
As entertaining as this story is it's absolute bs. It's from a novel.
I think he genuinely would have paused after the "dO yOu SeE jApAnEsE tOrPeDo BoAtS?"
The best part is russia has kept up the tradition of being embarrassed by their own navy and losing to other countries that don't even have one.
@@mofayer It's not lol
There are 2 things certain in life:
1) Death
2) It isn’t a Japanese torpedo boat
Good stuff
3) Until that ONE time, it actually is a Japanese torpedo boat, then mistake for a Russian fishing boat
@@whalienpippa lmaooooo
until it really was and they thought it was a fishing bout
What happened to taxes? Lol
The admiral had the patience of a saint....
Imagine being at sea for 7 months and dealing with complete idiots..
I'd have jumped overboard if I had to deal with these people for seven months, and taken my chances with the ocean even though I can't swim.
The intelligence of a Redditor lol
I thought for sure as he decided to teach them to actually hit their targets that some other wars would start from them sinking random fishermen
It's called incompetence.
Imagine have the ability and self control to not choke that captain out.
I told my boyfriend this story and he was in disbelief that an entire fleet could be the live embodiment of the Three Stooges.
They need to make a movie on this voyage and market it as a comedy and then when the credits roll and it says, "based on a true story" people will google it then freak out to find out its all true.
😂
I read this in the first few minutes and had to laugh until the end. Should never enlist young boys for war
Funny you said that... I was thinking of posting the same comment almost verbatim.
😂😂😂
This story gets better and better with each telling and hearing. They should make a movie out of it.
This would be the funniest war movie ever 🤣 😂 💀 😭
It would be a great military comedy.
Wes Anderson style or taika watiti Jojo rabbit style?
Omg yes! And I want Will Ferrell!
The Russians Are Coming, the Russians Are Coming, is a movie from early '70s, and filmed on Catalina island, CA, comes to mind.
Brings "I'd rather have an intelligent enemy, than a stupid friend." to a whole new level.
Good one haa hah. Im gonna try to remember that.
It would seem the most important training exercises should’ve been, “How to identify a Japanese torpedo ship.”
You mean a Russian fishing boat?
@@MrRyumaru No. I’m pretty sure they saw plenty of those! 🤣
@@suzanvaughn4522 nah only one at the end
Warthunder makes it even harder lol
@@suzanvaughn4522 thank you so much for your sense of humor in both responses haven't laughed so much at a comment in a while...pure gold👍
The fact that you could put all of this in a movie, use nothing but the truth, and it'll STILL be in the comedy genre is hitting me so hard LOL
😂 fucking hilarious. I could see Jack black captaining the rodifinski ( how ever the hell you spell that)
Right 😛
@@ericaz1458 so so funny, but sad too.
I find this hard to believe, sounds like something America made up for laughs
@@senseisaitama8684 Never underestimate the stupidity of peasants.
The even stranger irony of this story is that New Zealand and Australia were so worried about the Russian fleet coming down into the Pacific they commissioned a series of coastal forts guarding the main harbors. These forts consisting of 6 & 8 in Armstrong disappearing guns were not completed until after the Russian fleet had been beaten never fired a shot in anger. Two of the forts still exist to this day with one still in firing condition although it has not been fired since the 1950's due to an Albatross colony taking up residence.
The Kamchatka, the single most important asset to the Imperial Japanese navy.
LOL
Maybe they were spy’s all along dun dun dun would make a good comedy movie though :P
@@CoolGuy7159 I agree this would be a hilarious movie
Lmao, could have started a few more wars.
Friendly fire was in fact on
"We're okay"
Autocorrect: "Do you see Japanese torpedo boats?"
🤣🤣
Best part
I screamed incoherently so many times. This was one of them.
They had one job lol 😂😂
At this point in the video I started laughing so hard. My face and abs hurt now, my cheeks and beard are wet, and my wife looks concerned
I love how Mr Ballen was trying not to laugh at the sheer stupidity
😂😂😂
I know right 😂😂😂
@Kangarooster yeah!!!
@Kangarooster Yes!
T
This is the third time I've watched this episode. I don't think I've ever laughed as much, watching short vids. 😂😂😂 It's definitely my favorite! Thanks, MrBallen! ❤❤❤❤❤
I thought the nicknames, "manure sack" and "vast empty space", were a little cruel at first but then I heard the rest of the story..
🤭🤭🤭
I feel your Pain 😂
And you realize what a kind hearted gentle soul'd man he was. Manure sack and vast empty space were generous nicknames.
@@OvelNick 🤣🤣 yes. Yes, he was.
OMG this story !!!!! Why havent they made a film about this ?????
If someone wrote this as a comedic fiction the critics would say it's to unrealistic.
True
How where they that bad tho
I keep seeing it as a Warner Bros cartoon with Rozhestvensky played by Yosemite Sam...
I don't know about you guys but this is comedy gold and also sad. Oh man.
This would make for an awesome comedy movie.
I lost my shit when he said “they accidentally sent the message do you see Japanese torpedo boats.”
Same. That was when I knew it was going to go hilariously wrong.
Same
Same I’m pretty surprised how dumb that fleet was they Won themselves and Darwin Award
On that ship they wore sailor hats folded from newspaper.
That put the biggest fucking smile on ky face 😂
You got me at " they bought pets"... what could possibly go wrong with THAT!???😂😂😂
Morons: *Shoots at EVERY civilian boat they see*
Also Morons: *Assist the ONE enemy boat that actually approaches them*
Watchman finally learned the lesson, "it's NEVER a Japanese Torpedo Boat, it's a FISHING VESSEL!"
Hahahahahahhhahahahhaa bro I'm laughing so hard at that part
Lol
I am your 500th like
If only they’d recognised it, they could have started blasting each other again
I’ll bet this is where the phrase “I’m surrounded by idiots.” Came from.
Fingriskies
😅😅😅😅🤣🤣🤣🤣 I'll second that.... 😅😅😅🤣🤣🤣
I was hoping someone would have said “actually that’s from the lion king”
That actually came from jesus at the lastt supper...
@@luciferchrist4682 I don’t know much about the Bible or even Christianity but that was a good joke
Start of the video. "those nick names were a little harsh"
End of the video " he was being nice"
Lmfao!!! Yesss! Omg how dumb could they be!?!?
Bro I would’ve probably thrown them overboard they’re so dumb
Imagine all the names he had in mind for the Kamchatka crew
@@TheUndeadOhioan1999 imagine being the one competent crew member on that boat.
@@huntermckee2279 its even more funny when you realize Kamchatka was 5 miles ahead of them so all of his screams weren't heard...unless you were on the same ship as him. I would've personally had them all hung😂 can't hit a damn fishing boat yet when they get the ok to fire a shot in salute to a fallen comrade they use a live round and hit one of their own ships😂😂😂
I completely understand why this part was not taught in school 🤦🏾♀️
Most of it is probably fiction/propaganda that's why
The Japanese probably: “honestly, we’re surprised you got this far. After all the news reports, we thought your ‘secret’ fleet would sink itself.”
Surprised they weren't welcomed with confetti and a celebratory banner proudly proclaiming that they made it.
they tried their best to sink each other, they were incompetent at that as well
His own men psychologically broke him to the point he was just angrily screaming at Kamchatka on a nightly basis, I understand his pain on a spiritual level
I’m laughing so hard at this.
Same bro, same.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
😂 dido 👋 I can’t even leave the house without anxiety of Karen I faced armed men at night in Baghdad but I’m scared to go in Walmart and won’t if the parking lot has more then a qt full
“We’re okay.”
“We’re okay.”
“Do you see Japanese torpedo boats?”
dead
STILL DYING
Dude I cried laughing 😂😂
The biggest fkn trolls in history lol
Never have I choked laughing so hard before
OMFG, just the way he said it had me DEAD! Hahaha!!
This is one of my favorite all time videos. @mrballen holding a huge grin back the entire time, delivery is so good.
"Do you see Japanese torpedo boats?" Is easily the best part of this story. Followed by him screaming at them for it everynight. This is The Office of maritime incidents
Do you see Japanese torpedo boats in the room with you right now, Komchatka?
Fully agreed! Hahahahahaha too good
But...
Do you know how to get to bells canyon?
I tend to space out a lot at times thinking of random things so naturally my wife always ask what am I thinking about. "Do you see Japanese torpedo boats" will forever be my reply and we live in Phoenix AZ 🤣🤣🤣 I'm already cracking up thinking about it ☠
@@dylanholmes1985 classic 👌🏽 🤣
I think the best part of this is the fact that he went out every night and Screamed obscenities at the boat
😂 I do this in my vehicle....
Every night 🤣👍
Gotta Motivate it somehow.
I can just imagine the baltic crew being like puppies that shit on the floor and are now ashamed, but don’t know any better even after yelling
@@sunnienelson2435 me too the reverse sensor drives me nuts 🤣
I probably would have done that, too.
i am literally in awe of these people. like they literally didn't make a single good decision the entire time
Humans will never cease to amaze.
HAHAHAHA
It may have been left out. It is just a 20 minute video after all. But yes, they had enough bad decisions to probably fill up 15 min out of the 20.
It's pretty impressive innit.
It is a miracle they made it to Japan to begin with.
This has got to be my fav mrJB story, I watch it a couple times a year since it came out.
This story is literally just “But wait! There’s more!” in all the worst ways lmao.
More- Soyuz 1, MIR space station, Chernobyl...
It just keeps giving lmfao!
Order now and get a second monster for just 19.99 shipping and handling!!! It slices, it dices, it keeps the neighbor's kids in their own damn yard!!!!
Hey! Hold my beer!
Yes thats how feel lol
Who else has watched this multiple times because of how hysterical this story is??
Definitely one of my favorites!
i can’t remember the last time i laughed so hard!!
I've watched it like 5 times. Lmao😂
I'm working in the garage listing, had to stop and rewind it in one spot because I thought I heard it wrong... I didn't.
Dam are they sure they weren’t blanks they were firing 🤣🤣
I'm on my second listen
Before: "It can't be _that_ bad."
After: "Holy shit it's worse."
Man that's messed up being sent on a dummy mission
@@thelovepodcastnetwork4375 it was pretty much a suicide mission
It's not a mission anymore but a nightmare cruise
NOW I UNDERSTAND WHY THEY NAMED THAT VODKA KAMCHATKA!
That boat was full on ripped the whole time.
Morning shift change at helm: Where is the fleet?
Groan: No idea, dont worry, theyll catch up.
Same as I was thinking
It doesnt matter wether you watch a video from 3 years or 3 days ago, this guys story telling is absolutely top notch.you absolutely deserve all the success you have had man, i only hope for you to get even bigger.hes got the secret sauce, guard it like krabs gaurding the krabby patty recipe haha
In the course of trying to fight ONE war, Russia almost started like 5 wars
They may have been better off!lol I know I would've wanted to be anywhere else besides a Japanese prison camp 😳
@@LynnAgain83rather died than being capture by the nazi japanese
"Sorry for shooting at you hundreds and hundreds of times."
"It's ok"
"I am just glad you did not hurt yourselves."
Tpace they are the most chill fisherman ever🤣 I should be more chill when dumb stuff happens to me. Because it’s nothing compared to being shot at!!🤣
Hendrik LOL they were probably proud of themselves for not killing each other in this fake torpedo boat incident!😂
A normal day in Russia!
"Understandable, have a great day"
The dislikes are the Baltic Fleet mistaking Mr Ballen for a Japanese torpedo ship.
🤣
Lol truth
You win the comment section.
🤣🤪
LMAO
I heard you tell this story 2 years ago, and it's still a crazy story even now!
With friends like komchatka, you don’t need any enemies 😂😂😂. How this one single ship managed to almost get into war with 4 other countries is beyond me.
Sailors were all hicks from the sticks?
But you know how today's culture is. They were trying their hardest so they get a trophy for participation regardless........................................They really do.
I don't know what's funnier, that they fired upon the poor fisherman or the fact that every shot missed?
@@grmpEqweer and you’re scum from the slums.
@@AmbroseBurnside1824 You misread that. @A_Boogeyperson wasn't saying all sailors were hicks. @A_Boogeyperson was saying the Russian sailors involved were all hicks.
"No, this is your fleet"
Basically "this is how you'll be remembered forever". I bet he just went back to his ship and cried.
😂
I’d have fucking cried honestly
I would’ve had a mental breakdown lol
@@megami.x Should have just left after shooting kamchaka captain
I would have dipped 🤣
In Europe: "Japanese torpedo boats!!!"
Near Japan: "Russian fishing boat!"
Seriously. I'm sure he's only picking and choosing the interesting bits and I shouldn't judge when I've never experienced anything like it, but how incompetent do you have to be.
Imagine that
I bet the hospital boat crew were so pleased with themselves for not mistaking a fishing boat for a Japanese torpedo boat, for once in their godforsaken lives. "HEYYYYYYY WE DID IT WE LEARNED TO TELL DIFFERENCE!"
I was literally thinking the exact same thing. I face palmed my face so hard at the end!
If Japanese learn the fleet journey from beginning
Their obvious reaction
ruclips.net/video/e-Ckdg-dRpM/видео.htmlsi=3TlDl2MXvmh8JCQs
Baltic Fleet: *sees log floating in water* "JAPANESE TORPEDO BOATS OPEN FIRE!!"
*grabs life jacket, lays on the deck*
"Japanese ain't Killin me today."
@@brianvelez5153 That's good! Haha!
😹😹😹
*shoots at unarmed fishing boat*
"nice try japanese"
That was my favorite part of the story 😂
No common sense those guys. Lol
The way John is telling the story and how amused he is by the issues makes this hysterical story even better. This definitely should be made into a movie
Don’t ever call him John again. It’s Mr Ballen. Jesus Christ
@@davidbiagi2932Bit of an overreaction don’t ya think?
Dumb and dumber 3, in the Russian navy now
I cant beleive there is a historic war fleet that was so incompetent, they rivaled that of a Looney Toons episode. Incredible.
OMG, thank you so much for spelling Toons correctly! Fu@king Mandela effect.
First Mr. Ballen episode I laughed my ass off
The russians are famouse for their bad aquipment. In the second world war their tanks would just explode on any impact, while the germans were way advanced.. But the russians just kept bringhing more people.. Milions to spare
this story is absolutely made up, I have no idea what clown made this up, but with all respect to my man John, he should chose sources more carefull. because this IS extrimely ridiculous and nukes trust to his other videos being fact driven
Im really interested where did he get this catroonish shit
Happiness is coming across a MrBallen video that I've "supposedly" watched, but don't remember a thing about. So it's like a brand new video!
I gotta start going through the old videos again.
"They accidentally sent the message "Do you see Japanese Torpedo Boats?" I FUCKING LOST IT
AND THE ONE TIME THERE REALLY IS A JAPANESE TORPEDO BOAT
HOOOWWW do you ACCIDENTALLY say that many words instead of "we're okay"?
I didn’t think he was serious at first
It was probably meant as an intern joke, that wasn't meant to be actually send out and then oops! 😆
I literally fucking cried, and had to stop what I was doing lol
This story is absolutely epic. This needs to be made into a movie. Preferably a drama which would inevitably become a comedy.
Excuse me mr.ballen do you have any good stolen Valor stories. Like has anyone came up to you and said they were Rambo of any sort
Man...I don't know if this beats America's Willy Dee story or not. It definitely comes closer to matching the stupidity than I thought any story could.
It would be a great silent, short film. The kind that seems to be in fast-forward.
@Big Cat Little Lion you don't have to be such a dick lmao
@Big Cat Little Lion do you know any good stolen valor stories?
Literally the DEFINITION of “Fire at Will, NO NOT AT WILL DAMNIT-“
I like you talking about naval history as well as scary stories, you do it well
Honestly, that is just insane. They frequently mistook other vessels as Japanese torpedo boats, then mistook the only Japanese Torpedo boat as a Russian Fishing boat. You couldn't make this stuff up.
This would make for a great comedy film...or a cartoon. XD
How the fuck did they think they could over take the Japanese? I can't believe how ignorant Russia truly was. They couldn't even make it out of the harbor without having an accident.
@Rick Kivari This was before the Bolsheviks' took over. The communist took over Russia in 1917. The Czar mentioned in this story was murdered, along with his entire family, once the Bolsheviks' reign of terror began.
@Rick Kivari if you are talking communism/marxism, that came later after the bolshevik revolution
@@brandonrichey8420 Point was to recapture Port Arthur along with land forces, not to take over Japan. But their army was incredibly under prepared for a war on that scale as well, and things would just get marginally better a couple of decades later after their Civil War. Trotsky was a psychopath but what he managed to do with the Russian army during the Civil War (put it ALMOST to Western standards in abput 2 years) was a fricking miracle.
I can’t stop laughing at the idea of someone shooting hundreds of bullets at another boat, missing every shot…then being like, whoops! My bad!
It didnt happen once either. XD
If I was on that fleet, I would definitely not want to be on the boat known for messing everything up. XD that crew sounds like a mess.
😅
I know!!
Until the end I was laughing because i thought they can't really be that dumb.
I am surprised they lasted 7 months.
This could be the most impossibly ridiculous factual story I've ever heard.
Hey they hit targets. Just friendly ships
Uh oh, spaghetti-Os! xD
And then the guy was like "its all good bro"
Perfect example of how truth is often weirder than fiction. Every time I thought it couldn't get worse/crazier it did
I have listened to many of your stories. This is the one I enjoyed the most
“Do you see Japanese torpedo boats?”
I died laughing. I could honestly watch a full office-style tv series about the Kamchatka
Yes!!! This needs to be a show!
Haha The Kamchatka is definitely the Scranton branch lol
Omg YES the chaos!!!
Yes! Where's Michael?? When he's done being king of the space force, he needs to play that captain
I like how Britain considering war for the fishing boat incident was essentially "No one could be that stupid for the ships to look like torpedo boats."
The Russians were probably like... NO No Forreal! Yours are not the first fishing boats that group had fired upon
I would love to see George & Nikki's correspondence with each other about that incident! 🤷♀️🤦♀️😬😂
Poor Nikki couldn't win for loosing!
Oh yes they could !!!!
could you imagine the shame "No no.... we really were that dumb"
Except if people weren't trained for seafaring.
The part that had me dying, when they came across a Japanese torpedo ship for real, they didn't recognize it.🤣🤣🤣
They attacked everything: Fishing boats, friendly navies etc. right off the bat, except the Japanese. I can't imagine what the admiral was going thought.
as soon as i heard a Russian fishing boat(near Japan) i was like "what? why is there a Russian fishing boat fishing near Japan right now?" lol
Yep! Russians: 'Hah! We will not fall for this one again!'
I was about to comment just this 😂 after 7 MONTHS of seeing Japanese everywhere when they finally do … they don’t 🤣 tragicomic 😢
They talked to each other and had a conversation despite speaking two different languages? It obviously never happened like this. As bad as Russians have always been at war, this story is clearly heavily embellished.
9.2 million followers john! My goodness how things have grown! 🎉🎉🎉
Imagine thinking every fishing boat is a Japanese warship and then when a Japanese warship approaches you think its a fishing boat. . .
nah bro those aren't guns they are fishing rods i swear
This is the best ever. My same thought exactly.
That's explains the nick names
lol, The boy who cried wolf.
Lmaooo it actually did happen at the end 😭😭😭🤣
I died so hard when you said “ the captain would climb to the top of the ship to yell obscenities at the komchatzka” this needs to be made into a comesy movie.
Komchatzka is sailed by Mr Bean...
I can’t cope! How did they think EVERYTHING was a Japanese torpedo ship.. EXCEPT the Japanese torpedo ship.
Because they were idiots
😂😂😂
Hahahahahahahaha
THE BEST MR BALLEN STORY YET!
This entire story is so well told but the delivery of "Do you see japanese torpedo boats" at 13:40 is just gold.
Absolutely killed me
Me too!!!! 🤣
That was brilliant werent it , I couldn’t stop laughing
Lmao! Yes and his trying not to laugh had me laughingg too hahah
ngl that cracked the hell out of me
The Kamchatka is that one group during group projects that just doesn’t know what’s going on.
Like me for an example
I started to wonder if they were just messing around for laughs by the end.
I just love the fact that in an effort to cheer up the crew the officers decided to release a load of snakes and alligators on board.
"ENOUGH is ENOUGH!!! I HAVE HAD IT WITH THESE MOTHERFUCKING SNAKES ON THIS MOTHERFUCKING - Wait, is that a Japanese torpedo boat?!!"
"Sir, that's a seagull."
"SINK IT!!!"
Crocodiles. Not alligators.
Are you Baltic?
😛
I always knew deadly predators could be an enormous moral booster.
@@chasm671 lolol
I mean you can't be sad if you're eaten by a crocodile
This is my all time favourite Mr Ballem episode.
Frankly it’s a miracle that they made it to Japan at all.
and you will know us by the trail of stubbed toes
Snakes and crocs all over a ship those crazy bastards
Completely
The work of social media in the early days
@@Couplescience The Japanese did, in fact, know that the Baltic fleet was coming. They ambushed the Russian fleet and sank virtually every ship.
Started crying with laughter when they released crocodiles and snakes onto their own ship to boost morale
🤣🤣🤣
I can see that working honestly
There is an old gag. "The beatings will continue until morale improves!"
Hysterical 😩
For me it was the salute gunfire that hit the other ship.
Who else is glad that Mr. Ballen is back from vacay.
Thank you for your service John Ballen.
My life ie complete now. Idk what i did with my week he didnt post
Keep real history flowing ❤
"Would go up on deck and scream obscenties at the Kumchaka"
I fuckin lost it, i'm dead xD
The one time they weren't trigger happy was when the fleet was actually approached by a Japanese torpedo boat.
Such ah shame
That was my exact thought😂😂
In Europe: OMG it’s the Japanese!!!
In Japan: oh, don’t worry, it’s just a Russian fishing boat...
🤣
This is the funniest story I've ever heard. Crocodiles and poisonous snakes to boost morale.
Their worst enemies were literally themselves.
It's Russian.. probably they have bear as their pet lol
It was soo good ... That part killed me
Almost as bad as
Czar Nicolas Romanov letting Rasputin give him military advice.
Such an accurate comment 😂
First it was the poisonous snakes and crocodiles, than the imported cigarettes that were laced with opium were introduced. I would've killed myself if I had to be in charge of people who were stupid enough to get fishing boats mixed up with torpedo boats. And the one time they do come across a Japanese torpedo boat they get it mixed up with a fishing boat
Of all the videos I've watched so far, this one is the most unbelievable. I cannot fathom the gross ineptitude of a military unit
I'm so surprised that Rozhestvensky didn't stop the whole fleet and board the Kamtchaka to beat the living crap out of the crew
I'm suprised he didn't just sink the ship himself
I know I would have !!!!
@@abradolflincler00 Right !!!! I know I would have !!
@@abradolflincler00 Great name! Prepare to be emancipated from your own inferior genes!
He should have lol. They were such morons lol
an irl representation of what it's like being in a group project
Freaking true
LMAO
Frankly I'm surprised the Admiral didn't just point at Komchatka, scream "Japanese torpedo boat!" and let the rest of the fleet solve the root cause of all his problems themselves.
Well purposely blowing up the repair ship of the fleet would probably not have done them much good, although if it makes you feel any better the Crapchatka isn't one of the ships that survived the battle with the Japanese so they payed for their stupidity
But they would have missed😂😂😂
@@johnhowden3547 lmaooo that’s the sad truth
I'm surprised nobody has made a movie out of this. This would make an excellent comedy film! XD
I was gonna lose it if komchatka managed to survive and escape some how lmao
Oh my God, I love this. I'm laughing so bad. Thank you for sharing these stories the way you do; you've positively impacted so many lives, including mine!
During the entire trip, Admiral Rozhestvensky must've been like "How the hell will I fight a Japanese fleet when my fleet is already defeating itself without any help from the enemy".
For real!
When your the only competent person out of a thousand men.
Lmao I laughed at this comment 😂
Laughing soo hard at this comment 😂
@@aerynhoward3974 Bot.
I just love how MrBallen couldn't keep a straight face and was actively repressing laughter throughout most of the video. I was howling at "Do you see Japanese torpedo boats?" 🤣
hahaha
Same🤣
If you ever have a bad day, where you think you messed up so bad you can never overcome it. Just give this another watch.
Where*
This is still one of my favourite episodes - only Mrballen could tell it so well 😂😂
They mistake numerous fishing vessels for Japanese torpedo boats, then encounter a Japanese torpedo boat, “ohhhhh you, you’re not gonna fool me again, I know you’re a Russian fishing boat!!!”
Yeah they are really bad at identifying others and I feel really bad for EVERY fisherman in the ocean at that time.
I don’t know why but I’m sitting in my work truck watching RUclips videos in a WAWA parking lot at 645 pm and I guess I just don’t want to go home yet and have to start repiping my main house drain in my basement that started to leak along the whole bottom of the 55 ft run of cast iron on my concrete basement floor, not a hole in a few spots or a large crack that’s 3 ft long the whole run of exposed 80 year old extra heavy cast iron leaks everywhere along the bottom of the pipe, that’s really quite normal with all the soilds that don’t get washed away when you use a fixture that isn’t dumping enough water along with the waste it ends up sitting on the bottom of the pipe eating away at the cast iron until it’s paper thin and starts to leak , but back to this video I watched this video and found your comment and haven’t laughed that hard in five years so thank you I needed that .
@@mrbig4532 I'm so sorry for the troubles you're currently going through. I hope everything works out in the end! I learned some valuable stuff through your comment though so thank you for sharing 👍. And what a wholesome ending your comment had, that was so sweet❣God bless you!!
@@mrbig4532 shut up and get to work
@@LetsGoFlyers2011 alright give me a break I’m busting my ass , I’ll get it done . If only I didn’t go out last night to 3am and didn’t get so drunk that I can remember parking my car because one of the girls who I gave a ride to threw up when I was backing into a parking spot that I swore was large enough for my car to fit but something tells me when I finally find the area where I parked my car I’m going to find some rear passenger side damage.
Kamchatka: *spots literally anything*
Kamchatka: "Is this a Japanese torpedo boat?"
Except for an actual Japanese torpedo boat.
@@destituteanddecadent9106 omg ikr 😭😭🔫
The Kamchatka reminds me of Patrick asking if Mayonnaise was also an instrument
💀💀💀
The chad fisherman saying “it’s okay btw you’re promoted” after getting shot at more than 100 times is the best thing I’ve heard
Don't worry, they are seemingly practicing on a target 20 miles from our position.
I would’ve been more embarrassed for the general than upset
This has got to be the happiest I’ve ever seen MrBallen ever tell a story😂😂😂
This story needs to be made into a tragic comedy of some sort. It’s devastating but so unbelievably crazy.
This should be Chapter 1 of Warfare For Dummies😂
Just imagine the SEAL team equivalent back then swimming in the water just watching it happen sitting on the back of blue whales cause even the whales just stay put. The Subs were like old people on the road with Boomers and Millennials lol
Kinda like the death of Stalin:) freakin love that movie
Agreed🥴
That’s exactly what I was thinking, this is just too wild
“Admiral, we seem to have lost contact with the Kamchatka”
“Oh thank God, carry on”
*Baltic Fleet arrives at port*
“Admiral the Kamchatka has arrived at this port, they are no longer lost”
“FUCK”
"They report engaging three Japanese torpedo boats"
"Oh no, not again!"
@@winstonknowitall4181 what country did those boats come from
Hahaha
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
omg! exactly!
Who missed him all week 😔???
Everyone..... Except the like button
I was having Mr. Ballen withdrawals, lol.
Sooooo true!!! I felt empty and sad, then I turned it into anger and went hunting for Like buttons.
Me
It's been a rough week 😆😆😆
Omg, I laughed my a$$ off listening to this, even more when I noticed Mr Ballen was struggling to talk through it without almost laughing too😅
This leader deserved every medal available to him, he really must have struggled with what he was surrounded with 🤣
I bet by the end he even said "Thank you!" to the Japanese for taking him out of that mad house.
I keep re-watching this video at least once a week. No matter how big of a mess your life might be in it will pale in comparison to this episode of the three stooges.
Me and my husband loved this video so much, sometimes one of us will just randomly ask the other "Do you see Japanese torpedo boats?"
Do you also tell your husbands deepest secrets to their friends (ex-girlfriends) while visiting their area together? I mean that would be pretty funny too, but I think that ends everything and probably won't make it to a RUclips comment, so I'd just stick to the cute stuff
@@Scoat wtf ru talking about???!!!???!!!???????????¿????
@@joeboccard5603 It was funny in my head at the time, not so much in text. Just going to the next extreme from a cute quote/in joke to an extreme in joke that would ruin a relationship. That's all. it's not even that funny to me any more, too much to it,
@@Scoat nt…
@@NanashiHuy NT? Sorry, no idea what that means.
I never, like ever, laugh during your stories, but this had me in stitches
This story was too much 🤣🤣🤣. They decided to boost morale by buying pets, but the pets turned out to be Crocodiles and Poisonous Snakes. That killed me.
This is kind of relevant, Poland had a bear mascot in ww2. His name was Wotjek, he enjoyed beer and cigarettes and would carry ammo crates back and forth for the troops.
That being said at least he wasnt poisonous
It probably killed some people on those ships, too.
That seems like it would be a good time to lure some Japanese torpedo ship sailors onto the boat and then abandon ship...
@@joseph-fernando-pianoidk if they know what a Japanese torpedo boat looks like lolll
No big deal but.. You mean 'venomous snakes'. They can kill you by biting you. For a poisonous snake to kill you YOU would have to eat IT. It's a 'pet peeve' of mine.
Imagine being on those fishermen's boats.
"Either they're showing off by not hitting us or this navy is in serious trouble..."
When he said the crews were illeterate and lacking experience I didn't think he meant they were actually dumb as door knobs....
Horrific insult to door knobs
bro i was imagining the entire crew as those 2 guys from dumb and dumber
Honestly offensive to doorknobs
@@itried2hard633 Now I have a dozen Captain Jack Sparrows trying to fly a plane in my head lol
Illiterate *