PhD Essay Crisis | Submitting my First Dissertation Chapter on a Crunch |Dissertation Diaries Ep. 20
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- Опубликовано: 19 май 2024
- Title: PhD Essay Crisis | Submitting my First Dissertation Chapter on a Crunch | Dissertation Diaries Ep. 20
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x Kaelyn
I'm sorry you're having a difficult time, Kaelyn. I'm in the same boat as far as difficult topics go. I research intimate partner violence, abusive parent-child relationships, and generational cycles of trauma in families. For my Masters thesis, I interviewed adult children of abusive parents willing to share their stories with me. It honestly impacted me a lot more than I thought it would, and it made getting my thesis finished very difficult. It took me 1.5 years to complete, and I am happy to be done with it. While it was difficult, I think about what people will learn from what I'm writing and the stories I was able to tell, and it makes it more bearable. Now in my dissertation, I am taking that mindset with me - that I am holding up a mirror to this phenomenon for the greater good. We can get through this, and you have so many people cheering you on! Best of luck, Kaelyn, and give yourself some Grace (see what I did there?). YOU'VE GOT THIS!!!!
You definitely have a lot of research and knowledge base for writing a book and/or conducting workshops or even creating a podcast/RUclips series. I completed my English master's thesis in 2005, and I wish I had access to this understanding (channel) and my other favorite Oxford student channel, Ruby Granger. Preparation matters. It is what I teach my students today. Congratulations on your accomplishment.
Your videos never fail to inspire me. As a woman of African descent who has read some of the works that depict what you are currently struggling with just to understand myself a bit better, I would say, take a step back, breathe, and process whatever needs to be processed. It's hard (massive understatement) but I am here, you are here, we are all here, and that greatly matters. Keep doing what you do, practise self-care when necessary, and good luck!! I am rooting for you (even if you don't know me).
Thank you so much friend
Your transparency is so appreciated. As an African American, I am grateful for your dedication to this topic. These horrific laws and acts performed created generational trauma, your research is giving a voice to the silenced. 🙏🏽
I am incredibly inspired by your content.
Same here. I’m a southern African American woman who is in the middle of a second MA. And, I am 57 years old. 🤦🏾♀️ Whenever I start questioning my life choices, videos like this make me give myself a little push!
This is super relatable. I’m in still in the data analysis phase of my master’s project and I feel like all my confidence in myself has completely disappeared. I recently saw a quote that said “struggling is not failing” and I’m trying to remind myself of that more.
I truly believe that the projects that are most needed are often the most difficult to complete. I hope the value of your work keeps you inspired!
Kaelyn thanks for your honesty and real feelings and sharing this with us. It’s so refreshing seeing this in today’s world. Thank you again and hugs for your beautiful little doggy xx
Hang in there!! I've loved your videos during my PhD program. Just graduated a few weeks ago! 🎉 You got this too!!
I love your choice of soundtrack. I’m working listening to your video and the music makes me feel like I’m working towards something important. Not just sending out zoom links for a weeks worth of meetings coming up. Haha !
The montage was 🤌🏾🤌🏾 ive been listening to this soundtrack while studying lately, too 😜
Congrats on submitting the chapter!! ❤
Yes Kaelyn!! Congrats on submitting your work!! This was a really inspiring video and I loved learning more about how much you put into your dissertation! Thank you for sharing this 🎉😄
I think those videos do better bc it is something that feels easier to connect to - seeing the actual raw emotions of the difficult days of PhD. It’s nice to see that others also are facing the same challenges and creates a sense of community
I understand and relate to that ♥️ I just have a discomfort with how much it is rewarded, while joy is not (at least not to the same extent)
@@KaelynGraceApplethat’s true. I watch every video and appreciate the highs and lows! 🎉🎉😊
This was awesome! Started my DissCh2 a few months ago. This is great motivation to keep going strong. Thanks, Kaelyn! You are strong and amazing!
K, I can’t imagine reading the work and history you are doing, I am black myself and a descendant of slaves (I know there name) and I can barely stand it myself. But what you are doing is valuable! If you don’t write this and if you don’t do this and don’t contribute to the cause and research it gets lose and those who want to bury it will. Thank you for standing strong and getting this done. I hope one day to use it in my cause in as I move forward with nutrition because everything trickles down, it doesn’t stop at the end of slavery. Minorities are still operating with how they were conditioned from years ago.
Thank you for sharing your struggles with us. Your honesty is so refreshing and watching you work inspires me to sit down and write. Moo just makes me smile all the time ❤ Keep up the great work. You’ve got this. Liz x
Thank you so much Liz ♥️♥️
Hi Kaelyn! I have been watching your videos for quite some time as I myself am an aspiring PhD student in History. Although your insights regarding productivity and struggles of writing are undoubtedly instructive, I rarely hear you speak about the actual research dilemmas (e.g., methodological approaches, issues in literature) you experience along the way. I would (really) like to hear more on the process of researching, including you providing analysis of material you use for the development of your (hypo)theses.
Thank you for the feedback! I am really self conscious about this process but hope to share more in future
I really like the topic you talk about around minute 12, as someone who also studied history (and who still "loves" to read about the darker topics) and who now works in the news, I think it's normal and important to have some kind of distance when handling the material. It doesn't mean we're not humans or we don't care, but we need to protect our brain and go into "professional mode" sometimes
Good hustle Kaelyn!
10/10 montage ✨️
So proud of you!
yay! So glad you enjoyed it also
Beautiful video. I can 100% relate to getting stuck on the introduction and going through the structure over and over. I also miss my confident oblivious younger student me 😂
You did it!!!!🎉🎉🎉
By the skin of my teeth lol
The intense montage was a favorite of mine in this video lol! Wishing you luck throughout this process
haha I am so glad someone other than me enjoyed it
looking forward to your trip vlogs!
Dear Kaelyn, thank you for the work and effort you've been putting into your videos - you are a pro! I really appreciate the disclaimer at the beginning of the video - I clicked on yours today because I am also struggling to submit my dissertation, and you have always been a helpful support, providing tips and overall well-being advice, so I was curious as to what you would do this time. Thank you for sharing your vulnerability and reinforcing that taking care of yourself is still a must-do - never wasted time. Last night, I was crying in fear that I would not be able to deliver the work on time, and today has been a brilliant day of work with so many achievements. Sometimes, calling a day is opening room for a much brighter one to shine.
Best wishes and good luck!
Currently on the end of my Master program and this was so encouraging, I hadn’t thought about listening to soundtracks which I do enjoy but hadn’t coupled them with my studying and while writing papers so I will be trying it. I always use lofi or Christmas instrumental which I love but this might be a good change of pace for me.
Your dissertation diaries are by now a regular companion on my undergrad thesis writing journey🫶 (ps. I loved the dramatic clips😂🙃)
That passage around 26th minute broke me... in laugh!
Glad you enjoyed it lol
I found when finishing up my finals and feeling the pressures of perfectionism, sometimes it really is better to just word vomit to have something to start with. Typically, that gives you some sort of material to go off of and sprout the "perfect" paragraph
haha yes its good advice generally but I actually don't find it that useful, especially for this type of writing. Usually talking it out loud with a friend is best in my experience :)
That Vyvanse comment is SUCH a compliment! 😆
Hahaha truly
Thank you for showing what it's like going after your phd. I'm just finishing my masters and have been thinking about getting my phd. Still have no idea what I'll do. Thank you for the videos
✨ dramatic montage ✨ I love it 😂
My biggest struggle is editing myself while I write my first draft but I am slowly improving. I almost always save the introduction for last, because the rest of the article or proposal etc will tell me what is important to actually introduce.
This vlog came at the right time. I am currently writing my PhD proposal for submission two days from now and I am still crunching the introduction part. I realized I am sooooo slow with writing now. I finished my bachelor’s thesis in three days and my masters in a week. Not sure if it’s because I am older and my body just doesn’t like sitting, writing, and thinking so much now lol
My full dissertation draft is due to my committee no later than June 24th - I am still running some analyses and still need to make significant edits to Chapters 1, 2, and 5. I feel your pain. Writing has become a burden...but we are so close. Let's push forward and get it done. Wishing you luck. :)
Thank you so much for your videos. I’m in the process of applying for a PhD program after being out of school for 8 years. Do you have any recommendations preparing for research and reading?
OMG the dramatic zoom-in at 26:00! Hahaha
At 11:30-I’ve been in the same field of study as you for the last decade and i have been very familiar with those feelings.
Hi Kaelyn! This is super relatable honestly and it makes me much less anxious when I see that I'm not alone going through these levels of stress and anxiety. I've been wondering for a while now, since you mentioned it in a couple of videos, whether this is part of why you intend to leave academia after your PhD.
I don't want to assume anything, so I guess the question is rather: what made you decide to not pursue an academic career and work in edtech instead? Honestly I've seen a lot of these videos recently ('Why I left academia') and whilst they can be quite depressing, I do feel like they're necessary. I would love to hear your take on it.
I will make a full video on why in the future but a significant part is that the academy only rewards written scholarship and I feel like my skillset and interests are much too varied to find that career satisfactory
I find writing enjoyable (sometimes) but want to also be in a career which also rewards my love of visual mediums
@@KaelynGraceApple That makes a lot of sense, thank you for replying! I'll look forward to that video, then!
I'll read your dissertation. Promise!
as someone currently struggling to make it through my master's capstone, it makes me feel so much better that i'm not alone in how i'm feeling. the days where i can't focus on my reading or can't get any writing done stress me out so bad because i know the work needs to get done and the time is ticking but i feel a sense of camaraderie watching you experience the same emotions gives me a sense of community. To your point about your thumbnails, i feel like seeing your vulnerability is inspiring to a lot of people, but i also understand that it's a delicate balance. love the video kaelyn! as always, i'm rooting for you and your work! 🤍
🥺 thank you so much friend
the second part of the vlog is very fun lol although it's brutal to say that
Love your videos Kaelyn, and always have. I was a little uncomfortable with your reward system, though. As an autistic person, commonly reward systems like this are used and I am used to this. But - using food as a reward can be dangerous and if others adopt this method and have a history of eating disorders it could go south pretty fast. In addition, using a break as a reward may also be dangerous as we should always be able to take breaks whenever we need them. I am glad this works for you, but I guess where I got uncomfortable was endorsing this for others to use on your platform, as it could lead to unhealthy habits. Anyways, not trying to hate at all, I absolutely love your content, just some tips from someone who has had reward systems used on them before in this context.
Thank you for the feedback ♥️ I hadn’t considered it that way. This is what works for me but am not saying it would work for others
2:13👏🏻
Will there be a way we can read your dissertation one day? I’d really like to. Thank you for sharing your experience and insights.
Yes! Everyone’s dissertation is uploaded to proquest upon completion
@@KaelynGraceApple thank you! That’s great to know. I won’t ever get the chance to do what you’re doing but I wish I could and I will love to read your work. Congratulations on your continued progress :)
how often do you work with your friends + how do you initiate those kinds of working relationships with friends
Almost every day :) But I also lean on Accepted Society for daily writing sessions
@@KaelynGraceApple thanks! I've been feeling like I need that, and especially with people who may be studying the same thing. Thank you for sharing how it all gets done -- I'll need to find a daily/almost daily group!
14:11 Hey love your videos. It is horrible what humans are capable of. I completely applaud your strength to go through and live through this horrible documents. When something is ‘normal’ or ‘just the way the world is’, people end up participating in horrendous acts, instead of judging the situation themselves. We support similar acts of injustice at a larger scale to animals now and everyone is fine with it, similarly to what you are studying. It is our turn to open our eyes to the injustices of nowadays and speak up as well. I hope you do not take this the wrong way, but every-time you talk about this subject I draw parallels to what we do to animals nowadays. I know you are not vegan or anything, but just something to maybe consider? Thanks for your time
Thank you for your comment ♥️
Because the "crisis episodes" tend to get more views ... that doesn't mean you should have (or vlog) more crisis or that there is anything lacking from your non-crisis episodes.
People watch for one main reason: they're looking for inspiration and ideas in their own life. Moments of crisis is when we the viewer learn the most.
I guess ... and it's not like you were looking for advice but ... the episodes that aren't getting as many views, consider as a whole: what ideas or motivation does this vlog inspire in others?
Also ... your overall channel is amazing and the views will come. What will also happen is that the sporadic viewers find the crisis episodes, eventually they will get curious and go back through your channel and desire to see ... how these crisis began.
Thank you ♥️ logically I know this but it’s nice to have it acknowledged. Bless you, friend for your kind words. I hope my videos continue to connect with others
Moo is the absolute, undisputed cutie-patootiest. It's unfair, is what it is.
In my case, I just lied about my progress to the supervisor and finished everything at the last minute. In my defence, we had only 3 months.
oh my goodness 😅
My research is on Gender Violence and Human trafficking, so I totally understand how draining studying a topic like that can be. You can do it. but also give yourself grace and care, because it is tough.
From her conversation, it is specifically about legal discrimination on black women and black children of African dissents. Not gender
How many pages do you write per chapter?
30-60 pages
It is as if you read my mind. There is this dying of the younger more creative and confident self when one is in the program. I just started my second year, I am blessed with an incredible and supportive supervisory team but the issue is in my belief of self. I have never doubted myself like this in life. My project is literally going according to schedule but there is just this dread. You've got this Kaelyn!