The best way to describe social anxiety to a "normal" person: Try to live and act normally if you were suddenly transformed to another planet living with aliens. That is quite literally what a severe social anxiety feels like. Everything you have ever known about life suddenly doesn't make any more sense, people suddenly won't act the way you have used to know, every single word you say to anyone sounds stupid or weird and will get everyone's attention, you feel how people always stare at you very intensively even if you don't directly see them, you feel how uncomfortable people get the second they see you, they don't understand why you are always so quiet, they expect you to react to things like everyone else, but you can't because the fear is so overwhelming you can't even think straight. You can't act normally in front of groups (even small ones), sometimes the anxiety gets so bad you start to have difficulties to breathe, your mind races million times faster than usual, and you freeze still trying to desperately think the easiest way out, but you're thinking a thousand different things at the same time, even the most simple task is nearly impossible. That is my personal experience with SAD.
+Samuel Saarinen I actually don't believe anyone is normal. I think everyone suffers from some form of mental condition as once we are exposed to our surroundings, we are forced to adapt to the environment and interact with them. which all vary from mental capacity.
***** What do you mean am I just being an arm chair psychologist? I was positing what I innately felt. Since we are fragile creatures, there is certainly breaking point for everyone and everything.
***** And yet its a baseless assertion saying we "aren't all fragile". Its not as simple as you put it. No one is completely normal and thats what is part of being human. My initial comment "some form of mental condition" speaks about varying degrees of it. What people may "appear" as mentally fit may not be. I knew plenty of people who appeared 'normal' but were diagnosed with SA. A person with a mild form of anxiety would most likely hide it well compared to a person with Tourettes. There are people who have never seeked medication or visit a doctor who still have the conditions due to shame, expense, etc. Almost everyone in their life have at least experience once depression, anxiety or a breakdown. Stress is also a huge contributor. Basically for you to say the 'normal' people are not fragile is pretty much saying they are immune to every possible prone instability if faced from an experience, meaning they are perfect, when we are indeed all emotionally fragile from our surroundings.
Ella Herrick Parents can be very stubborn. I know its very hard to get help. Check out a few websites about social anxiety and stuff. Some techniques they teach really help.
I hit a rock bottom and my inhibitions for seeking help were alleviated to a degree. I opened up to somebody close who encouraged me to seek help and did most of the legwork in setting up appointments. I wasn't in a position to do so myself... I feel for you, my friend. Although I don't know you, I love you and wish you the best. You CAN reclaim the land lost to this shit. It can charge you to travel far beyond what you ever thought possible. It has been the darkest part of my life, but has wrought some of the brightest light as I overcome it.
purplemonkey582 I'm definitely the other way around. I can't talk to people one on one because I feel the need to keep a conversation going but if I'm in a group I feel better because I don't always have to talk.
it's robbed me of my young life to the point of total exile, I can't even talk to family members without a high level of anxiety. it's a horrendous imperfection and I will on any fellow sufferers to seek help, people who falsy claim this disorder for being 'uncomfortable in front of large groups' etc are discrediting a serious condition
same with me....i dont even talk to my own family that much....i distant myself from them and everybody and treat them like strangers. i dont talk to anybody and when i do....it comes off weird and incomplete and retarded. i much rather be alone and when im around people...i feel like i have to try act normal and get self conscious. i just stay on my phone or watch tv or social media to distract me from the fact of no life in reality. i shut down and when people try talk to me...i dont know how to respond, cause i dont get much human contact besides my family. Because of this, i cant even form relationships, have a job or live life.
You are not alone brother. And where I live people won't even take this problem into consideration. If I mention it they say why are you making such fuss.🙄
The main point of difference is avoidance. A shy person will go to a party, over time they will end up having fun. The person with SA wont even go to the party
I'm so happy I can finally name the problem I've been struggling with since 1st grade. Right now I'm following cognitive behavioral therapy. It really helps so everyone with social anxiety, please, get help.
@@yaboidarthsith1040 it's been great, but it's not like it magically solved all my problems. It helped me put my struggles in perspective which made it easier for me to get out of my comfort zone and grow as a person.
@@shivamkumarchoudhary12 I'm glad you asked! To put it briefly, yes, my social anxiety is gone. A whole lot has happened since I posted the original comment for this to be a reality. I'd say CBT gave me the tools for dealing with my problem in a healthier way. Again, I wouldn't say that CBT solved all my problems, but I recommend it to everyone who feels like their quality of life is greatly affected by their social anxiety. Here's a tip which helped me a lot: talk openly about your insecurities with people close to you. First of all, you'll find out you're not the only one who experiences anxiety. And the most important thing of all, step out of your comfort zone!
@@Yassinius I`m happy for your recovery but i think i`ll suffer it whole life,when i ocassionally plan to social it get more worse so i stop leaving my comfort zone
5:00 I just broke down and cried when he said "They've had it since childhood, this is just me, why would I go to a doctor for it?" Exactly what I feel, thats why I keep refusing treatment for it... I can even watch the rest of the video, it's describing exactly what I'm going through.
@@Caner-fq3cx it’s the feeling like i never enjoyed my teen years and i don’t want looking back as an adult and regret everything i did in those early years of my life.
This video describes me perfectly. I literally cried because I felt like they were talking about me. I've known I had this disorder for a year now and I have been wanting to get rid of it since. I'm 15 years old (almost 16) and this is ruining my life. My grades have dropped and I find it extremely hard to make friends. I've resorted to drinking alcohol and doing other drugs. I want to tell my parents and I want them to understand I'm not just shy. My freshman year of high school was horrible for me. I hope this year can be different. I want help but I feel like I physically can't do it. Thanks for reading my story. :)
I know this is long but I hope you read it all and motivates you and also gives you hope for yourself. I've had SAD since I was very young (my mother tells me I've been this way ever since I was able to talk). It only got worse for me when my parents decided to move into the US when I was 6. Not only did I have SAD but i didn't understand a single word in English. I was humiliated, insulted, beaten, and harassed simply because i couldn't speak English. Recess, every kids favorite time of school...right? Wrong, i f**king hated it! I would beg to my teacher to let me stay inside the classroom but she couldn't understand me and would forcefully make me go outside. But amongst those dark times, there was one person who became my only real true friend, but it all ended when he moved away two years later. I wasn't Bullied as much anymore but I became very Anti-social. I became that kid who sat in the back of the classroom and never spoke a word. Middle school wasn't much different for me but I now understood English efficiently enough to get myself out of situations. I made 9 great friends during those 3 years,sure, they weren't a lot but I was happy to even have 9 friends I could talk to. My High School experience was increasingly better than MS. In freshmen year I made new friends, again not a lot but they were truly good ones. Every year I made more friends, again not a whole lot of people but only a select few who accepted me for who I was. I graduated in 2007 with a total of 15 really good friends. Sure, there were times when I felt depressed, and I mean really depressed up the point where I felt suicidal, But my friends helped me get through it because they cared about me. Up to this day I have kept in contact and still hang out with those 15 great friends of mine. I am 25 and clinically diagnosed with a severe form of SAD, but I am living a happy life. I don't have a job, but I still earn money by doing what I love doing most, Art. I have always enjoyed art since I was young and now that i'm older I use my talent to earn an above average income. I do all forms of commissioned artwork. But above all, I have one very special and extremely supportive person, my beautiful girlfriend who is always there for me. The best advice I can give you, Brendan, is to find real loyal friends who will always be there for you. You don't need to have a lot of friends or be popular to live happily, you just need really goodones who truly accept you for who you are...but don't expect people to be the ones approaching you all the time, you must also go out there and find those people. Look for people who have common interest as you do and keep an eye out for other people with SAD because those people deeply understand how you feel and will end up being one of your closest friends. Find what makes you happy in life...whether that may be drawing, music, video games, writing, dancing...etc. Ignore what the negative people say because they are most likely jealous of your talents. I got a huge amount of hate on my artwork growing up but i just kept improving my talent and have now reached a point in life in which my talent is my greatest success. One last thing, you need to give up on alcohol and drugs because you will develop an addiction and it will only make your life far more difficult. Drugs and alcohol won't make you happy in life, they will only subdue the emotional pain and bring health problems you don't want. In your next year of school, I ask you to try a fun beneficial challenge called, "love Bugging". Basically the purpose of it is to make new friends. The way it works is you need to go out on campus and look for people whom you may have notice eat lunch alone, sit alone and so on...odds are they may be facing the same issue you are. Approach them and make small talk...if they are reading a book ask them what book they're reading and perhaps mention some books you've read then conversation will just take off on its own like a roller coaster. If they have a class with you, you could also start by saying "hey i've noticed you don't really talk to anyone, are you a new student?" (if they aren't) ask if they watch any good shows, movies..etc., but (if they are) ask them where they're from. Trust me that one works all the time. I urge you to give a try and earn a good friend not just for you, but for them as well. I promise you it will work. Best of luck to you, Brendan!
Man this made me shed a tear, I missed a whole lot of opportunities bc of this disorder. I would be in my college class, and shake when I had to introduce myself. Parents and teachers should pay attention to this.
I've struggled with SAD for a long time, and SO wish that I had been able to clearly see it in myself earlier on. I just assumed that it was "who I am". I can tell you now, after years of alcohol self-medication, throwing myself into scary situations despite panic attacks, and years of therapy, what has helped me the most is meditation. It is an amazing method to retrain your mind and I sincerely encourage anyone struggling with this to look into it.
Social anxiety is a SERIOUS condition. I'm 23 and have had SA for more than half of my life. I didn't develop friendships in high school and didn't go to college even though I had top honors. My anxiety was so bad, when I was 20 I lived on the street for months, sometimes so anxious I would just lie on the sidewalk, feeling unworthy of any goodness or relationships.
I never leave my house I don't really like other ppl and I always feel like something bad is going to happen to me . I hate how I can't bring myself to go out :(
I have suffered varying degrees of social phobia throughout my life. It has caused me to avoid employment and despite having had extended periods of feeling reasonably functional (ive been antidepressants for 30 years) ive now come to the age of 54 and have hit a wall and am unable to stop ruminanting on my shortcomings and missed opportunities due to my avoidance. We are all wonderful people and would urge particularly the young to get some help to assist them to engage with life. Its not easy but youre worth it
Aurora 😢(╥╯θ╰╥)(._.)i have perfectionist tendencies i am nortorious for being social online And well speakan just a unpopular person so i rather be alone.
Social anxiety + stutter is so bad. Even if I get to meet a therapist and know him/her well and feel comfortable speaking to him/her.. the stutter is the next step.
Mike Wright social anxiety disorder is a phobia that avoids many things from the public. The psychiatrists treat well and guide us for social interaction. Google it for Amazing Anxiety Perfecta Solution. The video is good for all.
with my social anxiety, i start to twitch or freeze and cant breathe. Sometimes i shut down and want to hide or i go into fmdefense mode and fall asleep.
Does anyone else notice themselves becoming very formal (almost robotic) when they're in a social situation? when they're experiencing a moment of social phobia? I can force myself to "get out there" and interact with people, but it's like my mind defaults to this overly-formal safe zone. The more nervous I am, the more formal I become. the more people think of me as snobbish.
I have severe SA as well. I'm 15 and I finally told my mom to make an appointment with a physciatrist. My parents are the type of people who believe depression doesn't exist so you could imagine how hard that was to tell them. I'm on medication now and it helps unbelievably well. To all SAers out there, you HAVE to go and get help no matter what. It's extremely hard, I know, but if I could do it I believe any SAer could. God bless all SAers. I pray everyone finds help.
I have S.A.Disorder and volunteered to be interviewed on national TV. Yes I was nervous but it was easier than I imagined it to be. Still did not go as smoothly as it could have. I just wanted to challenge myself and I had faith in the reporter who was aware of my condition beforehand. Im actually very glad I did so. Something I never thought Id be able to.
I have this Social Anxiety Disorder from the moment i started to be aware of myself, and i managed to learn about it only when i got 22, this is my current age right now.I think i understood that i had a problem for the first time when i was 13-14 years old,but you know i kept it hidden even if i understood that it was pulling me away from certain things in my life(doesn't sound smart in my head at all didn't then either, for those who think i'm crazy).Right now i strive for a normal life, i got to the point where it's not possible for me to keep on living like this,i don't know if i will overcome this disease, but i know for a fact that i'm going to fight it, i hope you will to because if you feel like i do, then you probably feel this hunger to do certain things, but the disorder is just taking it away in small pecies, so in my case i hope that passion to travel, and communicate will actually get a chance to evolve at a certain time in my life, wish us all to get better,a friend from Lithuania.
I've always been labelled as shy ever since I was little but I knew it was more than shyness. when I got to high school it got worse my friends told me I was boring and they kinda ignore me and I couldn't talk to someone to save my life, now I moved to a new high school and I'm flipping dying I don't even have any friends. If I tell my family they'll call me an idiot. My mother told me she hates hanging out with me because I suck the energy out of her because I'm not outgoing like her. social anxiety disorder flipping sucks.
WOW, from kindergarten to age 46 these men were talking about me to the greatest extent. My entire life has been spent dealing with this disorder on so many levels and in so many varying degrees depending on the circumstance. I've done research and take medication, which helps greatly when taken appropriately at the right dose, but I don't receive therapy for my condition as I have never been able to afford it. I decided to study psychology online and received my Associate degree a few months ago. I begin my Bachelor in psychology next month in hopes of helping those who suffer as I do. My studies, research, and medication still need therapy included in the mix for that I am sure, but how to manage that expense is my predicament. Their speaking even about missed opportunities, alcoholism, and shaking hands (in my case obviously quivering lips for whatever reason) nails me hands down. I can be in a job interview doing well but my lips will be quivering as I am telling myself to make it stop and answering questions at the same time. The strange part is my ability to appear intellectual and confident while my innards are screaming in fear. The only obvious sign are those damn lips! At least until I get to my car and about have a break down. I have been fortunate to work for two mental health agencies in an administrative and direct care staff manager capacity and have been exposed to many people with my diagnosis. My networking within these agencies taught me much and helped me arrive at my decision to study psychology. If I NEVER work in the field, at least I will learn about and be able to help myself (and since I am one of those older missed opportunities people I probably won't have to pay my student loans back because I'll grow old and die before they come due......LOL!!!) I greatly appreciate this video being posted so I can add it to my ever evolving portfolio of knowledge, understanding, and management of my very "life-intrusive" condition. Thank you
My amygdala goes to 11!! seriously, this is a shitty thing to have, but I am going to get help with it or at least try. I was diagnosed with Bipolar disorder, generalized anxiety disorder when I was about 18. I am now 48 and have fought this crap my entire life with meds. I'm currently a father of two older boys, I have a high profile sales job with with a company that calls on me to perform in social settings often. Somehow, I have managed to conceal the fact that I was a mess during many of these activities and would have rather in some cases have been dead!! maybe not quite "dead" but the inner terror I was feeling during these situations was brutal and totally irrational and I knew it. All the time I knew that it was silly to think what I was thinking but my body and my brain had other plans. For me it is public speaking which I know many people don't love to do but the fact that I have done it several times, I even MC'd a friends wedding the other month and was told by many I did a great job! none of that seems to matter and I never give myself a break. It's like each time is the first time. I have never passed up opportunities even knowing that I would at one point have to look the this in the eye! I am hoping that I find some way to rationalize and deal with it for my own peace of mind. Anyway, hope anyone reading this that has the same affliction can find a way to concur it, if not concur at least make a truce!!! Good Day..
He just pretty much explained my life. I always thought that I was just shy and that's "just the way I am" but I always kinda knew in the back of mind that my thoughts were a bit extreme and that it wasn't very normal for me to be anxious all the time about silly everyday situations that everyone goes through but unlike me, they act fine and relaxed. If there's anyone going through the same thing as me right now in school, work wherever, feel free to message me, I'd love to talk to someone else
I'm a Math Major and I've gotten to the point where I just cannot see myself graduating because I have to take a Speech class. I've been putting it off for 3 years now and I literally cannot sleep, I throw up in the morning, etc. I've always had a stuttering issue and that has made me more anxious. But other things have made me think I have a social anxiety disorder too. I've dropped classes where I saw I had to do a presentation. This has happened at least three times now. Challenge has never been much of an issue for me, but this is getting so frustrating. I've also never gotten a first job yet, at age 20... I'm too nervous to even think of about getting a job because I would have to interact with others. I have to write things down on a paper in order to talk on the phone and ordering off the phone has been a huge issue. During my calculus class on Wednesdays we were given quizzes and we had to turn them in, the space between desks is not much and I've always had fears of falling down and making a fool of myself, so before class I would go there and move them to the left to leave a huge gap. This is not everything, but do you think I need help? Do you think I have this disorder? I've never told my parents about this, but they have to know some of it. Thoughts? Sorry for the wall of text.
i hope things have gotten better. before i got social anxiety i was just shy in the sense i wouldnt ask a girl out but i was not nervous around anyone including doing presentations but one day i skipped school and it turned into a habit. the summer of that year i did not go out of my house at all i legit thought i was doomed. i found about hikikkomori and though about how much i was like them how i would never leave my house and never get a job. it was crazy to think i went from being able to talk to a hot girl and not feel nervous at all to not being able to leave my house... fast forward 6 years things are much better now but i still have social anxiety.
My life is being taken over... This anxiety is my shadow. No matter what is it always with me. Only in the dark is when it disappears. The dark I feel safe. The dark is where I can escape. I want so much to be in the light and be free but every time I take a step there she is she is Right besides me. She follows me everywhere. Sometimes I feel like if I just close my eyes forever... everything will be okay. 😞😞. I feel like baggage to everyone around me. I want to be everyone else kinda normal.
The psychodynamic explanation of social anxiety disorder: A person craves attention and approval, but anticipates being humiliated and rejected. Therefore, he or she avoids social situations. Sounds a lot like your shadow and light metaphor.
I was the clown of the class until I was like 14 years old, everything slowly changed then. Now i'm 21 and I can barely go to the store sober... I just don't understand what happened to me. Sorry if my english sucks, i'm Swedish. =)
I can completely relate to this! I was so loud and also the class clown and then I went to high school and now I don't even talk unless someone talks to me first and I have to respond. It's horrible :/
Krap Nek God damn, you described me to a fucking T. I had the exact same experience, class clown until high school, then total meltdown throughout high school. I am 21 as well, and same as you, can't even go to the grocery store sober. I moved 6 months ago from the US to Germany and have totally isolated myself from everything. it's fucking awful. my family I'm living with now wants me to go to university here, and get a nice job and all kinds of other shit. What they don't know is that I was totally comfortable at hime and took this up on a whim. sorry, I'm kinda drunk now as I write this.
Krap Nek Omg, i can't believe it was just me I thought i was crazy.. My social anxiety didn't start until 17 though.. Maybe it's a developmental disorder as well.
Do you think you overcompensated or were, perhaps, celebrated for standing out? Perhaps you relied on the attention you got for some other need you had that was more important at the time. I don't claim to know - partly because I'm like you, and currently leave my house a maximum of 1-3 times each month despite being an outgoing person most of my life - this is just an idea I had, as it relates to me, and I'm not sure by any means that that's actually what's going on with me.
it's kinda comforting hearing him talking about the things I struggle. I'm really bad at expressing my feelings, like, I feel it really deep but I just can't explain. the whole video this man it's talking exactly about what I feel and go through. it's comforting, somehow.
This means alot. I never knew till i went to the doctor and thought I was having a heart attack. To find my anxiety prevented me from doing lots of things. Breaking the wall was great.
To be honest, as long as you recognize that symptoms of SAD is your nature, you won't be treated. All of your sufferings are not your faults, but the evil disorder. I've been suffering with SAD more than 10 years. This disorder always try to destroy my social life and I attempted to kill myself over and over again throgh my tough life. Remember, if you are fighting against SAD, you need to consult a doctor and take SSRI medicine constantly. Everytime I go outside and get on a bus or train and go to school, workplace, restaurant, shopping or streets, my muscles of my entire body go stiff, especially my neck, shoulders, legs, chest, arms and I cannot breathe well. I cry and cry out a lot when I come back to home. I am completely tired. I think my 20's will be end by suffering SAD. I want take back my true self and my potential. Every moment is just so tough as hell for me. My life is just too hard and sad for me. Hope every patients of SAD get well.
I always feel terrified for my life, I just hate feeling afraid I wish I could recover from this, the feel of impending danger is overwhelming and exhausting both emotionally and physically
I have social anxiety disorder. It´s the most terrible thing! You can´t imagine how hard it is until you experienced it yourself! I always felt that i was alone with this disorder but reading all of these comments, i know that i´m not alone
Humans learn to be social as children. Learning how to share, how to play, learning how to have conversation, etc when they are toddlers, in preschool and grade school. For some who were the only child or home schooled or badly abused at home they never develop the tools to be social with others. It is far more than not feeling comfortable with public speaking or being in crowds. It causes many of these sufferers to be isolated or feel as if they are isolated from the world, lonely, depressed, and suicidal. It causes issues with family and especially authority that can cause a person to do time in jail or prison. They desperately want to fit in and understand rules and boundaries but they lack the tools to do so. They want friends but do not know how to go from a simple introduction to a friendship and often say the "wrong" things or talk incessantly afraid of the possible uneasy silence that comes with some conversations. They desire friendship and to be accepted so badly that they make unwise choices in who they are "friends" with befriending those who actually CHOOSE them in order to manipulate, use or abuse because they are easy targets. Due to this they avoid other humans and sometimes live as hermits. They often lack even one friend but if they do have one they imprison that friendship with control, jealousy, and manipulation through guilt so they will be their "forever friend". They tend to have issues making meaningful long lasting relationships with other humans even though they desire it more than anything. This is a real problem that is normally dealt with when a person is a child and in the developmental stages. Dealing with this when the person is an adult and has had many more scars of abuse, neglect, loneliness, self loathing, etc is NOT something you can "cure" in a youtube video. There is a difference between having a minor social anxiety and Social Anxiety Disorders and there is no easy fix for the latter.
you waste your money with doctors. find the root cause of yours like i did and heal from that and you will cure yourself. the power of the mind is amazing and limitless but ppl want an easy fix. do the inner work and you will be free
I have this too and it takes work. My social anxiety is not as bad as it used to be because I'm rationalizing my irrational thoughts and calming myself down before I go down the anxiety spiral. Also I find eating healthy, taking warm shows, drinking herbal teas, and deep breathing very helpful. The most useful thing you can do is to take deep breaths and laugh about your irrational thoughts because they are bizarre and absurd when looking at it from a 3rd person perspective.
I had social anxiety. It took me 2 years to overcome most of it. Now I get nervous from time to time but I never let it overtake me. Just keep working at it and realise that people make mistakes and never give up.
This interview is a great resource for anyone who wants to learn more about social anxiety. I recommend it to clinicians, students and the general population. Well done and thank you!
I have had anxiety issues for the last 14 years of my life. Some psychologists say that "self actualization" is the pinnacle of mental health. However, I feel that self actualization is the direct cause of anxiety. I relive every moment in my life and analyze what I could have or should have done differently. It is a complete insecurity. I simply believe that I am so self aware that it consumes me. I rarely feel that I am "myself". I have learned to control my anxiety attacks though.
Okay so my story: I'm not scared of really talking to people. But when I do, I just feel that they don't really are interested in the stuff that I say and that they would rather not listen to me, because theyre wasting their time. That's why I don't talk that much and exclude myself out of conversations because I think they just see me as the one boring person that is there but not really at the same time. And that's how I'm being treated, like I don't matter, like I'm just an extra. So I rather to stay out of this whole social thing completely and lose myself in my own world (homework, school work, music, books, writing, my family, films and serieses). These things make everything seems like home, like my own little world and I'm happy with that. But I sometimes feel so awkward when I'm in social situations, like I'm doing literally EVERYTHING wrong and that the other people think I'm such a weirdo. But that's the worst thing I can do and I know that. So from now on I'm going to fight my social anxiety and become a better person!!! ❤️
Ohmygoodness, I'm 62 & I have had this, my whole life, I just didn't now what it was. It started in elementary school, where I was badly bullied, then at home, when the physical & mental abuse started, from my Dad, when I was about 11 & that went on, for years! I've never ever felt like I fit in, I have never felt comfortable in my own skin, still don't, I'm always the quiet & shy one, when there's more than 2 people around because I'm afraid to speak & look stupid. I could go on & on about all the rotten things that have happened in my life. In my adult life I have suffered with depression & serious numerous suicidal thoughts, I was even admitted into the hospitals Psychiatric Ward for 3 weeks because of it. Now in my life I thought I have Agoraphobia because I rarely leave my house, so I don't have to deal with people. All of this, but yet when I was younger, I took a lot of self improvement classes, went to college & graduated at the top of my class, have bought my own home, rode a motorcycle for years, got married, ect.. I'm not stupid, but am afraid people will think I am & I have never had any confidence in myself, when I'm around people. It's been a crappy way to feel, my whole damn life!
This is such a incredibly well informed video. Everything Dr. Stein said was exactly how my experience of this disorder was. Thank you for uploading and giving me something to share to people that I know who don't understand this disorder very well.
My mom told me I was an embarrassment because my uncle invited me to a party and I didn't want to go. He grilled out and we were all gonna watch football, but heck I can't even eat lunch or break at school because I can't eat in front of people. I feel like I'm gonna do something wrong and they're gonna all judge and laugh at me. My mom made me feel so terrible that I felt like I was gonna cry :(
Thank you so much. You have really explained my problems. Whenever I'm to speak in public my heart races uncontrollably and I'll be visibly shaking. I couldnt fathom what was wrong with me because I it wasn't fear or shyness, even when I'm not scared it still happens. Now I know what is really wrong with me.
I think the problem with anxiety really comes down to confidence, and the way you boost your confidence is by knowing yourself and what you want to do in life and by having a social network. I've suffered with social anxiety almost all my life and I realize that it is easier for me to speak after I have had social interactions with co workers or acquiantances. It's not easy but I think you really need to sometimes force yourself to speak to people in a social setting.
i ve been a sufferer for 20 years, overcame if fully. thank god, what a relief. text me for questions, if required... i can tell this guy knows only half of the game
thanks for posting this informative vid. many ppl are misinformed and brush this disorder off as something you can just shake off. trust me, if i could shake it off, i wouldve long ago. i dont want this. nobody does. but anyone can overcome it with the proper support and appropriate exposure.
When your change the beliefs about yourself into a positive way than the critical voice in your head automatically calms down. You have to let the need for self-criticism go and get to learn who you are without judgements.
I did the same thing. I cut off a lot of old friends who I thought were only bringing me negative energy, and now I feel better. IDK about you, but I don't need friends, but I just wished I did have a group of friends and people to know and connect with. But time and time again I have realized that I don't do well with others..So the suffering continues.
I have been through just about everything these's guys have talked about. Being terrified to talk to people in groups, having people think im stuck up, being so scared of public speaking and human interaction that i dropped out of high school, and i am only 18 years old but thankfully i recently realized i have social phobia and im going to recieve treament.
If you try to bond with a circle of friends, but they reject you, this would traumatize you, and then you'd be reluctant to try to bond w/ another circle of friends again. Eventually you would not able to have any friendship with anyone anymore and would live totally isolated like a loner, but all because the fear (or anxiety) of getting rejected again. The anxiety(or fear) of experiencing the same trauma that happened to you first time you tried to socialize paralyzes you so much it prevents from socializing again. So fear (or anxiety) has an EXTERNAL reason, not internal. It's not your fault; it's people's fault. One does not fear something unreasonably; that something must have a relation (directly or indirectly) to some painful experience in the external world in the past, and now your internal is damaged by that external trauma. That damaged internal of yours I call the social anxiety disorder. So if you have social fear (or social anxiety) this means in the past some part of society has hurt and traumatized you and that's why society seems scary to you. But again it was NOT your fault, it was people's fault for being evil and mean to you.
U just described me. Isolating yourself is a defense mechanism for not risking getting rejected again. Im alone so much Im too used to it and live in my own world but getting older I long for friendship and good relationships.
yoyo2ma my friend, I think we all have suffered from the same trauma(getting rejected). Social anxiety is never based on phobia (phobia is a baseless fear), but no, the fear in social anxiety is not baseless; it's based on our past and real painful experiences with mean people. Loneliness is often the effect of the cause of a social anxiety. And loneliness is painful, but at the same time it's pleasurable too. And the pleasurable part of loneliness is that it keeps us in a safe zone where there is no chance of getting hurt again by those mean people in society (and not getting hurt feels the same as happiness). If suffering involved w/social life is painful, then avoiding the social life means avoiding its suffering too, which in turn no-suffering feels pleasurable. Many individuals at this point give up social life for the pleasure of loneliness, and to compensate for the sufferings involved w/lonely life they do creative works, writing, or music, etc. And these creative works are pleasurable in them too. Religion is also used by those who are religious to compensate for the suffering of a lonely life. So we see that social-life and lonely-life are both Painful AND Pleasurable. To believe that all the pleasures of life are in one side or the other is wrong. Pain and pleasure can be found in both life styles. A social life style is not all w/happiness and good things; there are a lot of sufferings involved w/social life style too. And the lonely life is not all involved w/pains and sufferings, there are a lot of joyful things involved in a lonely life too. And vise versa. We humans are complex beings. Animals aren't like us. Most animals can't live by themselves, but individual humans can live a loner life. Some cowboys are good example of loners. And all cultures have their share of loners. Also those who are rebels to the social ideals and idols who live all alone. But I believe even the most sociable person who has a lot of friends, family, and coworkers, he/she also deep inside has a inclination toward loneliness, because of the sufferings involved w/social life. But such sociable person cannot live all alone as loners can. So in this respect a loner is stronger than a sociable one, because a loner can tolerate the pains of loneliness, that a sociable one can only tolerate that for a short time; more than that would be too painful for him/her. I'm not saying one life style is better than the other; all I'm saying is that both life styles have their pros and cons, but at the end it's all up to the individual to decide for him/herself based on his/her unique personality and environment. Some individuals are loners by force, because society has hated them and socialization for them means a threat to their lives. So they feel compelled to stay away from people, because people have evil plan for them if they show up in public. These are the exceptions. But not all loners are living so isolated for the same identical reason. If you truly know you need another person in your life, you should make your mind in which life style you want to live. And if it's difficult for you to move towards a social life again, I'm just guessing maybe you'd need a help from someone you can full trust(like a sibling of parent) or a doctor.
Max Texts Great post! Yes all those mean people in my life that teased me or yelled at me have made me very cynicle about people where I assume most people r jerks and will hurt u in some way which hopefully is not true. All those painful memories have caused me to withdraw myself into my own little world. I live by myself, travel by myself, work by myself most of the day delivering mail, eat at restaurants and bars by myself for several years and I like it. The problem is Im so used to it that being around people at family get togethers, weddings etc make me very uncomfortable until I start drinking LOL. But u r right in that I can be very happy alone though at times I long for a wife and kids, maybe seeing everyone around me having them. But I can also accept that maybe being single is my destiny and I can perhaps embrace it where I have no responsibility for anyone but myself. I don't even try to talk to women because of my insecurities, feeling dumb because of my ADD, not making much money. Oh well. I can be happy on my own.
This video made me cry because i see myself while watching this. I have this disorder and i feel terrible. I am 15. My mom doesnt think its that serious! WELL. IT. IS!!! I need to get a psycologist. I cant imagine how great i would feel afterward. *cries* As you can see, i am very emotional. I can think of me in an emotional situation and then i cry because it feels real. I cried today reading touching stories about animals who save their owners' life or something. I have been doing research al
I can function at work fairly well, because its work. Everyone is there to do their job. I do my job, and I can communicate with others as long as it relates to the work. I don't exactly know why, I assume its due to the fact that its official, and who I am on a personal level is irrelevant and all that matters is that I can perform my duties, even if other people are involved. But put me in a non work environment social situation and I just need to run away, but I can't so I just leave the "circle" that is always formed and just put myself in standby until I find a way to leave. I begin having difficulty breathing, and it feels like my throat is closing up, like I'm being strangled and my heart starts beating violently and I become very tired, almost exhausted, and by the end of it I have a headache and feel completely drained and terrified.
I had social anxiety since i can remember i allways thought it is my fault missed alot of opportunities in life blamed my self allways wonder what kind of training and life situation that make people have confedence now i know it is a brain disorder what relief
There's only one YOU, and only YOU can do YOU better than anyone else. If you don't share who you are with the rest of the world, we'll miss out on something very unique and special. In other words....keep doing YOU!
I never thought I had social anxiety,I always thought that was just the way I was born. I used to think it was a personality,a part of me I can never banish,but naw.....I feel so powerful you mean I can be freed from this secluded boxes way of thinking. FINALLY!!! I'LL BE FREE!!! So....how do I overcome this thing?
one in twenty, thats incredible. thank you for the post. i have always lived this way and have just forced myself to deal with it, suck it in and avoid those really awkward moments. the video amazed me, the fact that i am not the only one. i dont now, the thoughts just seemed so personal and a part of my personality rather than an actual disorder. people also perceive me as a massive up myself snob, and i rather them think that than think im socially anxious.
I have SAD and it's a living hell, I'm currently going through important high school years and my self-doubt, worries, fears of being judged or not good enough is driving me insane and and it's making me become a whole new person, I'm so scared to just talk to a lady behind a supermarket counter without thinking she is judging me. I have palpitations nearly every night because something I may have done jogs my memory and haunts me. I don't know how to tell my parents. But I'm glad I found this.
i am 29 and never had a girlfriend because of this, never had many friends, i have gone many long periodds of my life without a single friend. sometimes i would be really hungry and want to go out and order something at a restaurant but dreaded going into the crowded place, i would pace back and forth in my room for an hour putting on my coat but then taking it off again as i changed my mind to not go. and i don't ever go to any fast food restuarant if there is a line, i just leave immediately
WOW watching this video and researching online just makes me happy when i realize exactly whats going on in my life and that something can be done over it.
I made a comment here a long time ago and would like to give an update: Like I said in my comment, I've had this disorder for over 10 years. I dropped out of school and completely ruined my life. I was living with my mom and even scared to get a job. After many different SSRIs, I was put on klonopin. It has made a HUGE difference. I get out more, I'm not scared to talk to people and I'm currently applying for jobs. If SSRIs don't work for you, try benzos. For some people they can REALLY help.
Man, I've struggled with this for years. It's still hard, but I believe ANY kind of anxiety disorder can be overcome or at least managed by behavioral therapy.
I have had this since middle school tbh remember when it happened the girl I liked had to move hurricanes came and hit Florida back to back,gave up football,basketball,parents split,dropped out of the 8th grade due to school,home and major life probs,involved in a hit n run now have seizures,scoliosis and blackouts a bit to.I still think to this day I gave it my best and held on for as long as I could yet everyone calls me a coward and they can't believe I am terrified of people..
I've been suffering from this condition for over half my life, was finally diagnosed and getting help/medication as of last year. Unfortunately I finally got more help because my condition became very severe, since then I was laid off and am now dealing with unemployment and trying to figure out what to do next.
Whenever I walk down the street, go into a supermarket or whatever I feel like people are looking at me and thinklng negative thoughts about me. I know it's irrational, but I can't seem to shake off the feeling. Even after I've posted this I'll be worrying that someone is going to be criticising what I've typed. This fear of being judged negatively affects every area of my life.
Believe me social anxiety disorder is a killer without treatment. It will kill you. Simple things like going to the doctors,work,everyday living, earning money for food etc is a (nightmare) it is reassuring to see other people who suffer this debilitating condition tho.Not in a bad way, just i ain't the only one...stay strong people..
this guy is just awesome, thank you for informaing and educaing the public about something that is really important and could change ones life dramatically.
Wow, this has affected me why whole life. I am 28, haven't worked for 5 years, and it is hard for me to even go outside. I had a friend I was talking to tell me it was anxiety. I went to Wafflehouse tonight. I heard the waitress say something to another customer about anxiety. She could have been talking about me, cause my friend hurried up and ate fast so I did too, to keep up with him. I am sitting here at home, wondering why I am not social to people, and I just connected the dots.
I've had this disorder for as long as I could remember. I'm also afraid to go outside and talk to people who I'm not familiar with, and I never speak up in class because of how self-conscious I am. Having a close nit group of friends has allowed my condition to improve a bit. I hope that you will find a way to get better as well.
your story is same with me,,i have SAD too,,today i have an interview to become a medical assistance,,i want to go but its like there are someone else that tell me i should'nt go,,and lastly i end up in the bed going no where..in college there is a pretty girl who like me and trying to get close to me,,but i just dont know how to start talking with her,i feel so nervous when talking to a girl,and today i still have no girlfriend. sometimes i feel useless being in this world..
5. Knowing that the unpleasant sensations are temporary and also that pleasant sensations are temporary. If we get attached to the fear and anxiety or the happy sensations...we are doomed as we want it again and again or hate them. Knowing their reality, that fear is impermanent can relieve one of the great pain. Easier said than done...but thats how great people have overcome suffering.Keep observing the impermanence of things.
"Missed Opportunities" sums my life up so much.
Id love to chat with you and give you my friendship.. ticoman1212@gmail.com or follow me on ig ticoman12 no more missed opportunities ok
invisiblekatie
hello, Katie, if you can, add me on facebook (josue mendonca) Brazil
invisiblekatie facebook is scary
Onion Bubs in a Social anxiety population there people who will truely understand it.
***** okay you posted this.thanks nice to know there ways to cope.
SAD (Social Anxiety Disorder) is the perfect acronym for this disorder that does cause sooooooo much sadness.
How do you know this?
@@joerosales6117 It is just an observation.
The best way to describe social anxiety to a "normal" person: Try to live and act normally if you were suddenly transformed to another planet living with aliens. That is quite literally what a severe social anxiety feels like. Everything you have ever known about life suddenly doesn't make any more sense, people suddenly won't act the way you have used to know, every single word you say to anyone sounds stupid or weird and will get everyone's attention, you feel how people always stare at you very intensively even if you don't directly see them, you feel how uncomfortable people get the second they see you, they don't understand why you are always so quiet, they expect you to react to things like everyone else, but you can't because the fear is so overwhelming you can't even think straight. You can't act normally in front of groups (even small ones), sometimes the anxiety gets so bad you start to have difficulties to breathe, your mind races million times faster than usual, and you freeze still trying to desperately think the easiest way out, but you're thinking a thousand different things at the same time, even the most simple task is nearly impossible. That is my personal experience with SAD.
+Samuel Saarinen I actually don't believe anyone is normal. I think everyone suffers from some form of mental condition as once we are exposed to our surroundings, we are forced to adapt to the environment and interact with them. which all vary from mental capacity.
that's exactly it.
***** What do you mean am I just being an arm chair psychologist? I was positing what I innately felt. Since we are fragile creatures, there is certainly breaking point for everyone and everything.
***** And yet its a baseless assertion saying we "aren't all fragile". Its not as simple as you put it. No one is completely normal and thats what is part of being human. My initial comment "some form of mental condition" speaks about varying degrees of it. What people may "appear" as mentally fit may not be. I knew plenty of people who appeared 'normal' but were diagnosed with SA. A person with a mild form of anxiety would most likely hide it well compared to a person with Tourettes. There are people who have never seeked medication or visit a doctor who still have the conditions due to shame, expense, etc. Almost everyone in their life have at least experience once depression, anxiety or a breakdown. Stress is also a huge contributor. Basically for you to say the 'normal' people are not fragile is pretty much saying they are immune to every possible prone instability if faced from an experience, meaning they are perfect, when we are indeed all emotionally fragile from our surroundings.
+Samuel Saarinen I've been researching top cure for shyness and found an awesome website at Seans Shy Program (google it if you're interested)
4:52 We don't seek care because were afraid to even pick up the phone and call.
Ella Herrick Parents can be very stubborn. I know its very hard to get help. Check out a few websites about social anxiety and stuff. Some techniques they teach really help.
I hit a rock bottom and my inhibitions for seeking help were alleviated to a degree. I opened up to somebody close who encouraged me to seek help and did most of the legwork in setting up appointments. I wasn't in a position to do so myself... I feel for you, my friend. Although I don't know you, I love you and wish you the best. You CAN reclaim the land lost to this shit. It can charge you to travel far beyond what you ever thought possible. It has been the darkest part of my life, but has wrought some of the brightest light as I overcome it.
MorningIrbis hi i learn how to be anxious
Andrew Gaines experts wow.
amen, glad someone else gets it
I can talk to people one on one but I just can't in groups unless i know each of the people very well
purplemonkey582 well said
purplemonkey582 I'm definitely the other way around. I can't talk to people one on one because I feel the need to keep a conversation going but if I'm in a group I feel better because I don't always have to talk.
Natasha Williams have you tried it out ?
Same
it's robbed me of my young life to the point of total exile, I can't even talk to family members without a high level of anxiety. it's a horrendous imperfection and I will on any fellow sufferers to seek help, people who falsy claim this disorder for being 'uncomfortable in front of large groups' etc are discrediting a serious condition
same with me....i dont even talk to my own family that much....i distant myself from them and everybody and treat them like strangers. i dont talk to anybody and when i do....it comes off weird and incomplete and retarded. i much rather be alone and when im around people...i feel like i have to try act normal and get self conscious. i just stay on my phone or watch tv or social media to distract me from the fact of no life in reality. i shut down and when people try talk to me...i dont know how to respond, cause i dont get much human contact besides my family. Because of this, i cant even form relationships, have a job or live life.
Couldn’t agree more with you and I am the same, I couldn’t talk to anyone without almost panicking from anxiety.
You are not alone brother. And where I live people won't even take this problem into consideration. If I mention it they say why are you making such fuss.🙄
@@MegzLifehow are yall now
How r u now
The main point of difference is avoidance. A shy person will go to a party, over time they will end up having fun. The person with SA wont even go to the party
I'm so happy I can finally name the problem I've been struggling with since 1st grade. Right now I'm following cognitive behavioral therapy. It really helps so everyone with social anxiety, please, get help.
how's the therapy been for you?
@@yaboidarthsith1040 it's been great, but it's not like it magically solved all my problems.
It helped me put my struggles in perspective which made it easier for me to get out of my comfort zone and grow as a person.
@@Yassinius Bro now your social anxiety is gone or it`s still present,should i go for cbt?
@@shivamkumarchoudhary12 I'm glad you asked! To put it briefly, yes, my social anxiety is gone. A whole lot has happened since I posted the original comment for this to be a reality. I'd say CBT gave me the tools for dealing with my problem in a healthier way. Again, I wouldn't say that CBT solved all my problems, but I recommend it to everyone who feels like their quality of life is greatly affected by their social anxiety.
Here's a tip which helped me a lot: talk openly about your insecurities with people close to you. First of all, you'll find out you're not the only one who experiences anxiety. And the most important thing of all, step out of your comfort zone!
@@Yassinius I`m happy for your recovery but i think i`ll suffer it whole life,when i ocassionally plan to social it get more worse so i stop leaving my comfort zone
5:00 I just broke down and cried when he said "They've had it since childhood, this is just me, why would I go to a doctor for it?"
Exactly what I feel, thats why I keep refusing treatment for it... I can even watch the rest of the video, it's describing exactly what I'm going through.
I once told my mom im scared all the time .. and .... nothing really was done to help me so i never asked for help again .
Lived with this demon all of my life, can't believe social phobia was a mental health problem since 1986
It starter for me I was about 8 years old, I'm now 53 years old, for me back in the late 1970.
I was diagnosed in 1984.
Lost opportunities with social anxiety, is a big deal with me. It has prevented me from taking career chances and pursuing higher education.
I am scared of growing old, I am a very lonely person right now. I feel like I am wasting my life... It just feels empty.
So did you overcome social anxiety?
me too I’m scared getting old. It’s like every teenagers are having fun while I’m having hard times socializing with people.
@@イマン-r1f why?
@@Caner-fq3cx it’s the feeling like i never enjoyed my teen years and i don’t want looking back as an adult and regret everything i did in those early years of my life.
@@イマン-r1f same😑😔
This video describes me perfectly. I literally cried because I felt like they were talking about me. I've known I had this disorder for a year now and I have been wanting to get rid of it since. I'm 15 years old (almost 16) and this is ruining my life. My grades have dropped and I find it extremely hard to make friends. I've resorted to drinking alcohol and doing other drugs. I want to tell my parents and I want them to understand I'm not just shy. My freshman year of high school was horrible for me. I hope this year can be different. I want help but I feel like I physically can't do it.
Thanks for reading my story. :)
I know this is long but I hope you read it all and motivates you and also gives you hope for yourself.
I've had SAD since I was very young (my mother tells me I've been this way ever since I was able to talk). It only got worse for me when my parents decided to move into the US when I was 6. Not only did I have SAD but i didn't understand a single word in English. I was humiliated, insulted, beaten, and harassed simply because i couldn't speak English. Recess, every kids favorite time of school...right? Wrong, i f**king hated it! I would beg to my teacher to let me stay inside the classroom but she couldn't understand me and would forcefully make me go outside. But amongst those dark times, there was one person who became my only real true friend, but it all ended when he moved away two years later. I wasn't Bullied as much anymore but I became very Anti-social. I became that kid who sat in the back of the classroom and never spoke a word. Middle school wasn't much different for me but I now understood English efficiently enough to get myself out of situations. I made 9 great friends during those 3 years,sure, they weren't a lot but I was happy to even have 9 friends I could talk to. My High School experience was increasingly better than MS. In freshmen year I made new friends, again not a lot but they were truly good ones. Every year I made more friends, again not a whole lot of people but only a select few who accepted me for who I was. I graduated in 2007 with a total of 15 really good friends. Sure, there were times when I felt depressed, and I mean really depressed up the point where I felt suicidal, But my friends helped me get through it because they cared about me. Up to this day I have kept in contact and still hang out with those 15 great friends of mine.
I am 25 and clinically diagnosed with a severe form of SAD, but I am living a happy life. I don't have a job, but I still earn money by doing what I love doing most, Art. I have always enjoyed art since I was young and now that i'm older I use my talent to earn an above average income. I do all forms of commissioned artwork. But above all, I have one very special and extremely supportive person, my beautiful girlfriend who is always there for me.
The best advice I can give you, Brendan, is to find real loyal friends who will always be there for you. You don't need to have a lot of friends or be popular to live happily, you just need really goodones who truly accept you for who you are...but don't expect people to be the ones approaching you all the time, you must also go out there and find those people. Look for people who have common interest as you do and keep an eye out for other people with SAD because those people deeply understand how you feel and will end up being one of your closest friends. Find what makes you happy in life...whether that may be drawing, music, video games, writing, dancing...etc. Ignore what the negative people say because they are most likely jealous of your talents. I got a huge amount of hate on my artwork growing up but i just kept improving my talent and have now reached a point in life in which my talent is my greatest success. One last thing, you need to give up on alcohol and drugs because you will develop an addiction and it will only make your life far more difficult. Drugs and alcohol won't make you happy in life, they will only subdue the emotional pain and bring health problems you don't want.
In your next year of school, I ask you to try a fun beneficial challenge called, "love Bugging". Basically the purpose of it is to make new friends. The way it works is you need to go out on campus and look for people whom you may have notice eat lunch alone, sit alone and so on...odds are they may be facing the same issue you are. Approach them and make small talk...if they are reading a book ask them what book they're reading and perhaps mention some books you've read then conversation will just take off on its own like a roller coaster. If they have a class with you, you could also start by saying "hey i've noticed you don't really talk to anyone, are you a new student?" (if they aren't) ask if they watch any good shows, movies..etc., but (if they are) ask them where they're from. Trust me that one works all the time. I urge you to give a try and earn a good friend not just for you, but for them as well. I promise you it will work. Best of luck to you, Brendan!
Also, I would suggest showing this video to your parents so they may understand that what you are going through is a real medical condition.
SIHK HELP
I feel the same man. It's so refreshing to finally hear people talk about the subject that actually know what it is and dont just think its an excuse.
Mine started at 9 years old but I'm afraid to tell my parents that I feel this way, I'm afraid they will judge me and say I want attention
Man this made me shed a tear, I missed a whole lot of opportunities bc of this disorder. I would be in my college class, and shake when I had to introduce myself. Parents and teachers should pay attention to this.
I've struggled with SAD for a long time, and SO wish that I had been able to clearly see it in myself earlier on. I just assumed that it was "who I am". I can tell you now, after years of alcohol self-medication, throwing myself into scary situations despite panic attacks, and years of therapy, what has helped me the most is meditation. It is an amazing method to retrain your mind and I sincerely encourage anyone struggling with this to look into it.
Social anxiety is a SERIOUS condition. I'm 23 and have had SA for more than half of my life. I didn't develop friendships in high school and didn't go to college even though I had top honors. My anxiety was so bad, when I was 20 I lived on the street for months, sometimes so anxious I would just lie on the sidewalk, feeling unworthy of any goodness or relationships.
how are you doing now?
I see this comment was posted 11 years ago. Did it get better? 🥺
It's like you're not worthy of being happy and enjoying life
I never leave my house I don't really like other ppl and I always feel like something bad is going to happen to me . I hate how I can't bring myself to go out :(
Same, I hate going out especially if it's a crowded place I just hate seeing people
same here
Zach Joseph
I feel EXACTLY the same & I am going through the exact same thing as you.
Maybe you hate where you currently live where would you want to live
@@chocolatewheelchair i hate where i live and people here to lol
I have suffered varying degrees of social phobia throughout my life.
It has caused me to avoid employment and despite having had extended periods of feeling reasonably functional (ive been antidepressants for 30 years) ive now come to the age of 54 and have hit a wall and am unable to stop ruminanting on my shortcomings and missed opportunities due to my avoidance.
We are all wonderful people and would urge particularly the young to get some help to assist them to engage with life.
Its not easy but youre worth it
I hate
When people
Think I am rude
I am sorry
I am just so
Scared
star toad XD potato-girl9 I can empathize quite well.
Hiding in my room i am an aspie
Aurora 😢(╥╯θ╰╥)(._.)i have perfectionist tendencies i am nortorious for being social online And well speakan just a unpopular person so i rather be alone.
Hey what up
fuck them
I was crying through out this whole video, everything these guys talked about I been through and am still going through.
Hi Chris, I hope you have overcome it
@@mohammedsalih8283 never. It's like being a tree watching everything passed by and you can't do anything, can't even move.
It's been 13 years chris,how r u mate
One of the best discussions I’ve ever heard about the disorder. Accurate, informative, unbiased and professional.
Social anxiety + stutter is so bad. Even if I get to meet a therapist and know him/her well and feel comfortable speaking to him/her.. the stutter is the next step.
Mike Wright social anxiety disorder is a phobia that avoids many things from the public. The psychiatrists treat well and guide us for social interaction. Google it for Amazing Anxiety Perfecta Solution. The video is good for all.
lol
with my social anxiety, i start to twitch or freeze and cant breathe. Sometimes i shut down and want to hide or i go into fmdefense mode and fall asleep.
Does anyone else notice themselves becoming very formal (almost robotic) when they're in a social situation? when they're experiencing a moment of social phobia?
I can force myself to "get out there" and interact with people, but it's like my mind defaults to this overly-formal safe zone. The more nervous I am, the more formal I become. the more people think of me as snobbish.
How you doing nowadays?
I have severe SA as well. I'm 15 and I finally told my mom to make an appointment with a physciatrist. My parents are the type of people who believe depression doesn't exist so you could imagine how hard that was to tell them. I'm on medication now and it helps unbelievably well. To all SAers out there, you HAVE to go and get help no matter what. It's extremely hard, I know, but if I could do it I believe any SAer could. God bless all SAers. I pray everyone finds help.
I have S.A.Disorder and volunteered to be interviewed on national TV. Yes I was nervous but it was easier than I imagined it to be. Still did not go as smoothly as it could have. I just wanted to challenge myself and I had faith in the reporter who was aware of my condition beforehand. Im actually very glad I did so. Something I never thought Id be able to.
I don't even feel confident to talk to even my best friend as it the holidays I don't even see anyone I just stay in my room
Chloe Reviews
That's exactly what I do.
You live with family?
Me too! This is so crazy!!! Keep all of my jokes to myself or if I do tell one it falls flat or I bail on it if people look confused.
A fantastic discussion on the utterly life-crippling disorder known as Social Anxiety.
Thank you.
I have this Social Anxiety Disorder from the moment i started to be aware of myself, and i managed to learn about it only when i got 22, this is my current age right now.I think i understood that i had a problem for the first time when i was 13-14 years old,but you know i kept it hidden even if i understood that it was pulling me away from certain things in my life(doesn't sound smart in my head at all didn't then either, for those who think i'm crazy).Right now i strive for a normal life, i got to the point where it's not possible for me to keep on living like this,i don't know if i will overcome this disease, but i know for a fact that i'm going to fight it, i hope you will to because if you feel like i do, then you probably feel this hunger to do certain things, but the disorder is just taking it away in small pecies, so in my case i hope that passion to travel, and communicate will actually get a chance to evolve at a certain time in my life, wish us all to get better,a friend from Lithuania.
Thank you for those beautiful and powerful words. Thank you.
I've always been labelled as shy ever since I was little but I knew it was more than shyness. when I got to high school it got worse my friends told me I was boring and they kinda ignore me and I couldn't talk to someone to save my life, now I moved to a new high school and I'm flipping dying I don't even have any friends. If I tell my family they'll call me an idiot. My mother told me she hates hanging out with me because I suck the energy out of her because I'm not outgoing like her. social anxiety disorder flipping sucks.
This hits home really hard :(
Sarahxx505 this how i communicated mostly
I feel your pain.
how are you feeling now?
@@suzan7867 It's been difficult, had a total mental breakdown 3 years ago but I've been getting better since that :)
Wow, this video is eye opening. Also makes me a bit teary for some reason.
Same, i started crying while listening
Same, I’m crying.
WOW, from kindergarten to age 46 these men were talking about me to the greatest extent. My entire life has been spent dealing with this disorder on so many levels and in so many varying degrees depending on the circumstance. I've done research and take medication, which helps greatly when taken appropriately at the right dose, but I don't receive therapy for my condition as I have never been able to afford it. I decided to study psychology online and received my Associate degree a few months ago. I begin my Bachelor in psychology next month in hopes of helping those who suffer as I do. My studies, research, and medication still need therapy included in the mix for that I am sure, but how to manage that expense is my predicament. Their speaking even about missed opportunities, alcoholism, and shaking hands (in my case obviously quivering lips for whatever reason) nails me hands down. I can be in a job interview doing well but my lips will be quivering as I am telling myself to make it stop and answering questions at the same time. The strange part is my ability to appear intellectual and confident while my innards are screaming in fear. The only obvious sign are those damn lips! At least until I get to my car and about have a break down. I have been fortunate to work for two mental health agencies in an administrative and direct care staff manager capacity and have been exposed to many people with my diagnosis. My networking within these agencies taught me much and helped me arrive at my decision to study psychology. If I NEVER work in the field, at least I will learn about and be able to help myself (and since I am one of those older missed opportunities people I probably won't have to pay my student loans back because I'll grow old and die before they come due......LOL!!!) I greatly appreciate this video being posted so I can add it to my ever evolving portfolio of knowledge, understanding, and management of my very "life-intrusive" condition. Thank you
My amygdala goes to 11!! seriously, this is a shitty thing to have, but I am going to get help with it or at least try. I was diagnosed with Bipolar disorder, generalized anxiety disorder when I was about 18. I am now 48 and have fought this crap my entire life with meds. I'm currently a father of two older boys, I have a high profile sales job with with a company that calls on me to perform in social settings often. Somehow, I have managed to conceal the fact that I was a mess during many of these activities and would have rather in some cases have been dead!! maybe not quite "dead" but the inner terror I was feeling during these situations was brutal and totally irrational and I knew it. All the time I knew that it was silly to think what I was thinking but my body and my brain had other plans. For me it is public speaking which I know many people don't love to do but the fact that I have done it several times, I even MC'd a friends wedding the other month and was told by many I did a great job! none of that seems to matter and I never give myself a break. It's like each time is the first time. I have never passed up opportunities even knowing that I would at one point have to look the this in the eye! I am hoping that I find some way to rationalize and deal with it for my own peace of mind. Anyway, hope anyone reading this that has the same affliction can find a way to concur it, if not concur at least make a truce!!!
Good Day..
Maybe you can message me and give me some advice. These guys just explained my life
dudefrombarrie i taking rispordone why?
He just pretty much explained my life. I always thought that I was just shy and that's "just the way I am" but I always kinda knew in the back of mind that my thoughts were a bit extreme and that it wasn't very normal for me to be anxious all the time about silly everyday situations that everyone goes through but unlike me, they act fine and relaxed. If there's anyone going through the same thing as me right now in school, work wherever, feel free to message me, I'd love to talk to someone else
"social anxiety? You mean shyness? Im shy too" -said every person without SA ever
I’m fighting against social anxiety every day.
I'm a Math Major and I've gotten to the point where I just cannot see myself graduating because I have to take a Speech class. I've been putting it off for 3 years now and I literally cannot sleep, I throw up in the morning, etc. I've always had a stuttering issue and that has made me more anxious. But other things have made me think I have a social anxiety disorder too. I've dropped classes where I saw I had to do a presentation. This has happened at least three times now. Challenge has never been much of an issue for me, but this is getting so frustrating. I've also never gotten a first job yet, at age 20... I'm too nervous to even think of about getting a job because I would have to interact with others. I have to write things down on a paper in order to talk on the phone and ordering off the phone has been a huge issue. During my calculus class on Wednesdays we were given quizzes and we had to turn them in, the space between desks is not much and I've always had fears of falling down and making a fool of myself, so before class I would go there and move them to the left to leave a huge gap. This is not everything, but do you think I need help? Do you think I have this disorder? I've never told my parents about this, but they have to know some of it. Thoughts? Sorry for the wall of text.
It sounds like you should ask for help. I know that bringing it up will probably be scary but it'll hopefully be worth it! good luck man
Yes,those are the so called symptoms of it.Try not to give a fuck about what other people thinks about you.Stay strong bro.
i hope things have gotten better. before i got social anxiety i was just shy in the sense i wouldnt ask a girl out but i was not nervous around anyone including doing presentations but one day i skipped school and it turned into a habit. the summer of that year i did not go out of my house at all i legit thought i was doomed. i found about hikikkomori and though about how much i was like them how i would never leave my house and never get a job. it was crazy to think i went from being able to talk to a hot girl and not feel nervous at all to not being able to leave my house... fast forward 6 years things are much better now but i still have social anxiety.
I know exactly what this is ...my whole family has this ...
My father
My mother
My brother
My sister
I'm adopted ...I'm a social butterfly !!!!!!!
My life is being taken over...
This anxiety is my shadow. No matter what is it always with me. Only in the dark is when it disappears. The dark I feel safe. The dark is where I can escape. I want so much to be in the light and be free but every time I take a step there she is she is Right besides me. She follows me everywhere. Sometimes I feel like if I just close my eyes forever... everything will be okay. 😞😞. I feel like baggage to everyone around me.
I want to be everyone else kinda normal.
The psychodynamic explanation of social anxiety disorder: A person craves attention and approval, but anticipates being humiliated and rejected. Therefore, he or she avoids social situations. Sounds a lot like your shadow and light metaphor.
I feel the same way.
I was the clown of the class until I was like 14 years old, everything slowly changed then. Now i'm 21 and I can barely go to the store sober... I just don't understand what happened to me. Sorry if my english sucks, i'm Swedish. =)
I can completely relate to this! I was so loud and also the class clown and then I went to high school and now I don't even talk unless someone talks to me first and I have to respond. It's horrible :/
Larapic me too
Krap Nek God damn, you described me to a fucking T. I had the exact same experience, class clown until high school, then total meltdown throughout high school. I am 21 as well, and same as you, can't even go to the grocery store sober. I moved 6 months ago from the US to Germany and have totally isolated myself from everything. it's fucking awful. my family I'm living with now wants me to go to university here, and get a nice job and all kinds of other shit. What they don't know is that I was totally comfortable at hime and took this up on a whim. sorry, I'm kinda drunk now as I write this.
Krap Nek
Omg, i can't believe it was just me I thought i was crazy.. My social anxiety didn't start until 17 though.. Maybe it's a developmental disorder as well.
Do you think you overcompensated or were, perhaps, celebrated for standing out? Perhaps you relied on the attention you got for some other need you had that was more important at the time. I don't claim to know - partly because I'm like you, and currently leave my house a maximum of 1-3 times each month despite being an outgoing person most of my life - this is just an idea I had, as it relates to me, and I'm not sure by any means that that's actually what's going on with me.
it's kinda comforting hearing him talking about the things I struggle. I'm really bad at expressing my feelings, like, I feel it really deep but I just can't explain. the whole video this man it's talking exactly about what I feel and go through. it's comforting, somehow.
This means alot. I never knew till i went to the doctor and thought I was having a heart attack. To find my anxiety prevented me from doing lots of things. Breaking the wall was great.
i have social anxiety disorder. Panic attacks are a daily occurrence for me. I was on paxil but I stop taking them. I just wish this life will end.
you and me both brother and people just don't get it. And all of us who do have it and do understand will never meet each other.
Try breathing techniques against anxiety, Google them.
Sage tea is also very effective.
Thanks
Tony Stewart
Garlic contains adenosine which acts as a natural sedative.
To be honest, as long as you recognize that symptoms of SAD is your nature, you won't be treated. All of your sufferings are not your faults, but the evil disorder. I've been suffering with SAD more than 10 years. This disorder always try to destroy my social life and I attempted to kill myself over and over again throgh my tough life. Remember, if you are fighting against SAD, you need to consult a doctor and take SSRI medicine constantly. Everytime I go outside and get on a bus or train and go to school, workplace, restaurant, shopping or streets, my muscles of my entire body go stiff, especially my neck, shoulders, legs, chest, arms and I cannot breathe well. I cry and cry out a lot when I come back to home. I am completely tired. I think my 20's will be end by suffering SAD. I want take back my true self and my potential. Every moment is just so tough as hell for me. My life is just too hard and sad for me. Hope every patients of SAD get well.
I always feel terrified for my life, I just hate feeling afraid I wish I could recover from this, the feel of impending danger is overwhelming and exhausting both emotionally and physically
Metoo
I love these two guys! A very intelligent and compassionate discussion. Great information and very helpful ❤️
I have social anxiety disorder. It´s the most terrible thing! You can´t imagine how hard it is until you experienced it yourself! I always felt that i was alone with this disorder but reading all of these comments, i know that i´m not alone
Humans learn to be social as children. Learning how to share, how to play, learning how to have conversation, etc when they are toddlers, in preschool and grade school. For some who were the only child or home schooled or badly abused at home they never develop the tools to be social with others. It is far more than not feeling comfortable with public speaking or being in crowds. It causes many of these sufferers to be isolated or feel as if they are isolated from the world, lonely, depressed, and suicidal. It causes issues with family and especially authority that can cause a person to do time in jail or prison. They desperately want to fit in and understand rules and boundaries but they lack the tools to do so. They want friends but do not know how to go from a simple introduction to a friendship and often say the "wrong" things or talk incessantly afraid of the possible uneasy silence that
comes with some conversations. They desire friendship and to be accepted so badly that they make unwise choices in who they are "friends" with befriending those who actually CHOOSE them in order to manipulate, use or abuse because they are easy targets. Due to this they avoid other humans and sometimes live as hermits. They often lack even one friend but if they do have one they imprison that friendship with control, jealousy, and manipulation through guilt so they will be their "forever friend". They tend to have issues making meaningful long lasting relationships with other humans even though they desire it more than anything. This is a real problem that is normally dealt with when a person is a child and in the developmental stages. Dealing with this when the person is an adult and has had many more scars of abuse, neglect, loneliness, self loathing, etc is NOT something you can "cure" in a youtube video. There is a difference between having a minor social anxiety and Social Anxiety Disorders and there is no easy fix for the latter.
you waste your money with doctors. find the root cause of yours like i did and heal from that and you will cure yourself. the power of the mind is amazing and limitless but ppl want an easy fix. do the inner work and you will be free
I am the type of guy when someone says that I am shy, I get 200% shy.
I have this too and it takes work. My social anxiety is not as bad as it used to be because I'm rationalizing my irrational thoughts and calming myself down before I go down the anxiety spiral. Also I find eating healthy, taking warm shows, drinking herbal teas, and deep breathing very helpful. The most useful thing you can do is to take deep breaths and laugh about your irrational thoughts because they are bizarre and absurd when looking at it from a 3rd person perspective.
I had social anxiety. It took me 2 years to overcome most of it. Now I get nervous from time to time but I never let it overtake me. Just keep working at it and realise that people make mistakes and never give up.
This interview is a great resource for anyone who wants to learn more about social anxiety. I recommend it to clinicians, students and the general population.
Well done and thank you!
I have had anxiety issues for the last 14 years of my life. Some psychologists say that "self actualization" is the pinnacle of mental health. However, I feel that self actualization is the direct cause of anxiety. I relive every moment in my life and analyze what I could have or should have done differently. It is a complete insecurity. I simply believe that I am so self aware that it consumes me. I rarely feel that I am "myself". I have learned to control my anxiety attacks though.
Okay so my story:
I'm not scared of really talking to people. But when I do, I just feel that they don't really are interested in the stuff that I say and that they would rather not listen to me, because theyre wasting their time. That's why I don't talk that much and exclude myself out of conversations because I think they just see me as the one boring person that is there but not really at the same time. And that's how I'm being treated, like I don't matter, like I'm just an extra. So I rather to stay out of this whole social thing completely and lose myself in my own world (homework, school work, music, books, writing, my family, films and serieses). These things make everything seems like home, like my own little world and I'm happy with that. But I sometimes feel so awkward when I'm in social situations, like I'm doing literally EVERYTHING wrong and that the other people think I'm such a weirdo. But that's the worst thing I can do and I know that. So from now on I'm going to fight my social anxiety and become a better person!!! ❤️
Ohmygoodness,
I'm 62 & I have had this, my whole life, I just didn't now what it was.
It started in elementary school, where I was badly bullied, then at home, when the physical & mental abuse started, from my Dad, when I was about 11 & that went on, for years! I've never ever felt like I fit in, I have never felt comfortable in my own skin, still don't, I'm always the quiet & shy one, when there's more than 2 people around because I'm afraid to speak & look stupid. I could go on & on about all the rotten things that have happened in my life. In my adult life I have suffered with depression & serious numerous suicidal thoughts, I was even admitted into the hospitals Psychiatric Ward for 3 weeks because of it.
Now in my life I thought I have Agoraphobia because I rarely leave my house, so I don't have to deal with people.
All of this, but yet when I was younger, I took a lot of self improvement classes, went to college & graduated at the top of my class, have bought my own home, rode a motorcycle for years, got married, ect.. I'm not stupid, but am afraid people will think I am & I have never had any confidence in myself, when I'm around people.
It's been a crappy way to feel, my whole damn life!
God bless all social phobics.
I'm still recovering to this day,even though I'm not fully over it.
This is such a incredibly well informed video. Everything Dr. Stein said was exactly how my experience of this disorder was. Thank you for uploading and giving me something to share to people that I know who don't understand this disorder very well.
My mom told me I was an embarrassment because my uncle invited me to a party and I didn't want to go. He grilled out and we were all gonna watch football, but heck I can't even eat lunch or break at school because I can't eat in front of people. I feel like I'm gonna do something wrong and they're gonna all judge and laugh at me. My mom made me feel so terrible that I felt like I was gonna cry :(
brought me to tears. never believed in therapy or anything. i'm going next monday. thank you.
People don't realize how serious this problem is
It's been eight years that I've been suffering from this, and I didn't even know it was a thing.
Thank you so much. You have really explained my problems. Whenever I'm to speak in public my heart races uncontrollably and I'll be visibly shaking. I couldnt fathom what was wrong with me because I it wasn't fear or shyness, even when I'm not scared it still happens. Now I know what is really wrong with me.
I think the problem with anxiety really comes down to confidence, and the way you boost your confidence is by knowing yourself and what you want to do in life and by having a social network. I've suffered with social anxiety almost all my life and I realize that it is easier for me to speak after I have had social interactions with co workers or acquiantances. It's not easy but I think you really need to sometimes force yourself to speak to people in a social setting.
Thank you. It's good to hear people discussing social anxiety.
As someone who has Social Anxiety, this doc knows EXACTLY what hes talking about
Exactly. I've been like this since I was atleast seven. They never even thought of getting me help. I'm 16 now.
i ve been a sufferer for 20 years, overcame if fully. thank god, what a relief.
text me for questions, if required... i can tell this guy knows only half of the game
thanks for posting this informative vid. many ppl are misinformed and brush this disorder off as something you can just shake off. trust me, if i could shake it off, i wouldve long ago. i dont want this. nobody does. but anyone can overcome it with the proper support and appropriate exposure.
When your change the beliefs about yourself into a positive way than the critical voice in your head automatically calms down. You have to let the need for self-criticism go and get to learn who you are without judgements.
This video is amazing and it goes right into how I feel in every day life. Thank you so much, I am ready to change my life.
I did the same thing. I cut off a lot of old friends who I thought were only bringing me negative energy, and now I feel better. IDK about you, but I don't need friends, but I just wished I did have a group of friends and people to know and connect with. But time and time again I have realized that I don't do well with others..So the suffering continues.
This upload is great, i'm trying to deal with going outside and facing people at this moment
I have been through just about everything these's guys have talked about. Being terrified to talk to people in groups, having people think im stuck up, being so scared of public speaking and human interaction that i dropped out of high school, and i am only 18 years old but thankfully i recently realized i have social phobia and im going to recieve treament.
If you try to bond with a circle of friends, but they reject you, this would traumatize you, and then you'd be reluctant to try to bond w/ another circle of friends again. Eventually you would not able to have any friendship with anyone anymore and would live totally isolated like a loner, but all because the fear (or anxiety) of getting rejected again.
The anxiety(or fear) of experiencing the same trauma that happened to you first time you tried to socialize paralyzes you so much it prevents from socializing again.
So fear (or anxiety) has an EXTERNAL reason, not internal. It's not your fault; it's people's fault. One does not fear something unreasonably; that something must have a relation (directly or indirectly) to some painful experience in the external world in the past, and now your internal is damaged by that external trauma. That damaged internal of yours I call the social anxiety disorder.
So if you have social fear (or social anxiety) this means in the past some part of society has hurt and traumatized you and that's why society seems scary to you. But again it was NOT your fault, it was people's fault for being evil and mean to you.
U just described me. Isolating yourself is a defense mechanism for not risking getting rejected again. Im alone so much Im too used to it and live in my own world but getting older I long for friendship and good relationships.
yoyo2ma my friend, I think we all have suffered from the same trauma(getting rejected). Social anxiety is never based on phobia (phobia is a baseless fear), but no, the fear in social anxiety is not baseless; it's based on our past and real painful experiences with mean people.
Loneliness is often the effect of the cause of a social anxiety. And loneliness is painful, but at the same time it's pleasurable too. And the pleasurable part of loneliness is that it keeps us in a safe zone where there is no chance of getting hurt again by those mean people in society (and not getting hurt feels the same as happiness). If suffering involved w/social life is painful, then avoiding the social life means avoiding its suffering too, which in turn no-suffering feels pleasurable.
Many individuals at this point give up social life for the pleasure of loneliness, and to compensate for the sufferings involved w/lonely life they do creative works, writing, or music, etc. And these creative works are pleasurable in them too. Religion is also used by those who are religious to compensate for the suffering of a lonely life.
So we see that social-life and lonely-life are both Painful AND Pleasurable. To believe that all the pleasures of life are in one side or the other is wrong. Pain and pleasure can be found in both life styles. A social life style is not all w/happiness and good things; there are a lot of sufferings involved w/social life style too. And the lonely life is not all involved w/pains and sufferings, there are a lot of joyful things involved in a lonely life too. And vise versa.
We humans are complex beings. Animals aren't like us. Most animals can't live by themselves, but individual humans can live a loner life. Some cowboys are good example of loners. And all cultures have their share of loners. Also those who are rebels to the social ideals and idols who live all alone.
But I believe even the most sociable person who has a lot of friends, family, and coworkers, he/she also deep inside has a inclination toward loneliness, because of the sufferings involved w/social life. But such sociable person cannot live all alone as loners can. So in this respect a loner is stronger than a sociable one, because a loner can tolerate the pains of loneliness, that a sociable one can only tolerate that for a short time; more than that would be too painful for him/her.
I'm not saying one life style is better than the other; all I'm saying is that both life styles have their pros and cons, but at the end it's all up to the individual to decide for him/herself based on his/her unique personality and environment.
Some individuals are loners by force, because society has hated them and socialization for them means a threat to their lives. So they feel compelled to stay away from people, because people have evil plan for them if they show up in public. These are the exceptions. But not all loners are living so isolated for the same identical reason.
If you truly know you need another person in your life, you should make your mind in which life style you want to live. And if it's difficult for you to move towards a social life again, I'm just guessing maybe you'd need a help from someone you can full trust(like a sibling of parent) or a doctor.
Max Texts Great post! Yes all those mean people in my life that teased me or yelled at me have made me very cynicle about people where I assume most people r jerks and will hurt u in some way which hopefully is not true. All those painful memories have caused me to withdraw myself into my own little world. I live by myself, travel by myself, work by myself most of the day delivering mail, eat at restaurants and bars by myself for several years and I like it. The problem is Im so used to it that being around people at family get togethers, weddings etc make me very uncomfortable until I start drinking LOL. But u r right in that I can be very happy alone though at times I long for a wife and kids, maybe seeing everyone around me having them. But I can also accept that maybe being single is my destiny and I can perhaps embrace it where I have no responsibility for anyone but myself. I don't even try to talk to women because of my insecurities, feeling dumb because of my ADD, not making much money. Oh well. I can be happy on my own.
+Max Texts That shit was thought provoking, awesome!
Thank you for this. ❤️🥺I thought I was being over dramatic for awhile
This video made me cry because i see myself while watching this. I have this disorder and i feel terrible. I am 15. My mom doesnt think its that serious! WELL. IT. IS!!! I need to get a psycologist. I cant imagine how great i would feel afterward. *cries* As you can see, i am very emotional. I can think of me in an emotional situation and then i cry because it feels real. I cried today reading touching stories about animals who save their owners' life or something. I have been doing research al
I can function at work fairly well, because its work. Everyone is there to do their job. I do my job, and I can communicate with others as long as it relates to the work. I don't exactly know why, I assume its due to the fact that its official, and who I am on a personal level is irrelevant and all that matters is that I can perform my duties, even if other people are involved. But put me in a non work environment social situation and I just need to run away, but I can't so I just leave the "circle" that is always formed and just put myself in standby until I find a way to leave. I begin having difficulty breathing, and it feels like my throat is closing up, like I'm being strangled and my heart starts beating violently and I become very tired, almost exhausted, and by the end of it I have a headache and feel completely drained and terrified.
Pietro Aretino i very well agree
So relatable ive always thought this about myself
I had social anxiety since i can remember i allways thought it is my fault missed alot of opportunities in life blamed my self allways wonder what kind of training and life situation that make people have confedence now i know it is a brain disorder what relief
How are you now
i feel like i would be able to do anything without SA. it really sucks having it, it just cripples everything u do in life
There's only one YOU, and only YOU can do YOU better than anyone else. If you don't share who you are with the rest of the world, we'll miss out on something very unique and special. In other words....keep doing YOU!
I never thought I had social anxiety,I always thought that was just the way I was born. I used to think it was a personality,a part of me I can never banish,but naw.....I feel so powerful you mean I can be freed from this secluded boxes way of thinking. FINALLY!!! I'LL BE FREE!!! So....how do I overcome this thing?
Once I fight SAD, I will help other people to know "There is name for what you are suffering"
Hey how you doing now? 🤪 did u overcome it?
one in twenty, thats incredible. thank you for the post. i have always lived this way and have just forced myself to deal with it, suck it in and avoid those really awkward moments. the video amazed me, the fact that i am not the only one. i dont now, the thoughts just seemed so personal and a part of my personality rather than an actual disorder. people also perceive me as a massive up myself snob, and i rather them think that than think im socially anxious.
I suffer from anxiety since childhood, now i work at a bank in customer service days come where I don’t even eat
I have SAD and it's a living hell, I'm currently going through important high school years and my self-doubt, worries, fears of being judged or not good enough is driving me insane and and it's making me become a whole new person, I'm so scared to just talk to a lady behind a supermarket counter without thinking she is judging me. I have palpitations nearly every night because something I may have done jogs my memory and haunts me.
I don't know how to tell my parents. But I'm glad I found this.
i am 29 and never had a girlfriend because of this, never had many friends, i have gone many long periodds of my life without a single friend. sometimes i would be really hungry and want to go out and order something at a restaurant but dreaded going into the crowded place, i would pace back and forth in my room for an hour putting on my coat but then taking it off again as i changed my mind to not go. and i don't ever go to any fast food restuarant if there is a line, i just leave immediately
WOW watching this video and researching online just makes me happy when i realize exactly whats going on in my life and that something can be done over it.
I made a comment here a long time ago and would like to give an update:
Like I said in my comment, I've had this disorder for over 10 years. I dropped out of school and completely ruined my life. I was living with my mom and even scared to get a job.
After many different SSRIs, I was put on klonopin. It has made a HUGE difference. I get out more, I'm not scared to talk to people and I'm currently applying for jobs.
If SSRIs don't work for you, try benzos. For some people they can REALLY help.
💯real and it still needs more awareness. It’s a feeling that cannot be felt unless you truly experience it.
you know for the longest time i thought this problem was just me. I never knew it was a disorder, and that several others have it as well...
Man, I've struggled with this for years. It's still hard, but I believe ANY kind of anxiety disorder can be overcome or at least managed by behavioral therapy.
I cured my SAD when I moved to another continent.
Wierd.
But I'm much happier :)
I have had this since middle school tbh remember when it happened the girl I liked had to move hurricanes came and hit Florida back to back,gave up football,basketball,parents split,dropped out of the 8th grade due to school,home and major life probs,involved in a hit n run now have seizures,scoliosis and blackouts a bit to.I still think to this day I gave it my best and held on for as long as I could yet everyone calls me a coward and they can't believe I am terrified of people..
I've been suffering from this condition for over half my life, was finally diagnosed and getting help/medication as of last year. Unfortunately I finally got more help because my condition became very severe, since then I was laid off and am now dealing with unemployment and trying to figure out what to do next.
This video hit my problem right on the spot. It was as if Dr. Murray read my thoughts and problems.
I keep thinking how easy it is to just end it all, I don't know what to do anymore
Whenever I walk down the street, go into a supermarket or whatever I feel like people are looking at me and thinklng negative thoughts about me. I know it's irrational, but I can't seem to shake off the feeling. Even after I've posted this I'll be worrying that someone is going to be criticising what I've typed. This fear of being judged negatively affects every area of my life.
Believe me social anxiety disorder is a killer without treatment. It will kill you. Simple things like going to the doctors,work,everyday living, earning money for food etc is a (nightmare) it is reassuring to see other people who suffer this debilitating condition tho.Not in a bad way, just i ain't the only one...stay strong people..
this guy is just awesome, thank you for informaing and educaing the public about something that is really important and could change ones life dramatically.
Wow, this has affected me why whole life. I am 28, haven't worked for 5 years, and it is hard for me to even go outside.
I had a friend I was talking to tell me it was anxiety.
I went to Wafflehouse tonight. I heard the waitress say something to another customer about anxiety. She could have been talking about me, cause my friend hurried up and ate fast so I did too, to keep up with him.
I am sitting here at home, wondering why I am not social to people, and I just connected the dots.
I've had this disorder for as long as I could remember. I'm also afraid to go outside and talk to people who I'm not familiar with, and I never speak up in class because of how self-conscious I am. Having a close nit group of friends has allowed my condition to improve a bit. I hope that you will find a way to get better as well.
your story is same with me,,i have SAD too,,today i have an interview to become a medical assistance,,i want to go but its like there are someone else that tell me i should'nt go,,and lastly i end up in the bed going no where..in college there is a pretty girl who like me and trying to get close to me,,but i just dont know how to start talking with her,i feel so nervous when talking to a girl,and today i still have no girlfriend. sometimes i feel useless being in this world..
5. Knowing that the unpleasant sensations are temporary and also that pleasant sensations are temporary. If we get attached to the fear and anxiety or the happy sensations...we are doomed as we want it again and again or hate them. Knowing their reality, that fear is impermanent can relieve one of the great pain. Easier said than done...but thats how great people have overcome suffering.Keep observing the impermanence of things.