Explaining Irish Wedding Drinking To An American Doctor | Jarlath Regan | Irish Standup Comedy
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- Опубликовано: 27 май 2021
- There's a different set of rules for drinking alcohol at Irish weddings Irish comedian. Getting married? Going to an Irish wedding? Why not share this video to prepare your friends for what's about to happen.
Jarlath Regan donated a kidney to his brother and wrote a hit standup show about it. This is a clip from that show - uncensored. Recorded at Vicar Street the same night of taping his new standup special Notions Eleven. Available to stream for free now here on my RUclips channel. (Unbleeped! As requested by our excellent channel subscribers) 
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The difference between a Irish funeral and a Irish wedding is one less drunk
Finnegan would disagree.
One less drink-ER, your autocorrect is acting up.
@@meattroller8853
Nope. It was right the first time.
@@NoLefTurnUnStoned. GOT HIM MATE
This is racist!
I’ve been to one Irish wedding in my life. In Killarney in 2019. I had heard all the jokes and stereotypes about Irish weddings and assumed that’s all they were. About three hours into the reception, I saw a man drinking out of a flower vase centerpiece, seemingly thinking it was a fancy cocktail. It completely lives up to the hype.
😂😂😂🥹
@@user-hu9ys2mm1b Not all gypsy's are bad , I was in a bar one night and was drinking with them till the wee hours and didn't even realize that they were travellers to the next day....only by the occupational conversation that they said....civil lads, good craic and thought have a bad stereotype...there is bad eggs in every community in conclusion
Haha. 😅
😂😂
Brilliant 👏
I saw an Irish doctor years ago in Edinburgh. He asked how often I drank, & I said "socially" (was in my twenty-something student years!). He then asked where I was from. When I enquired why he wanted to know he said "Well...I come from Ireland, & 'social drinking' there is very different from the rest of the world!!" It still makes me chuckle!
Don't go to Poland................. the Irish are lightweights compared to us Polaks.
@@lotuselise4432 Most definitely true-and I'm Irish
@@danstapleton7753 - Ha Ha ;o))))
@@lotuselise4432 Ah yes. The Poles. Renowned throughout Ireland as bad drunks. Neck a bottle of vodka, threaten a few people they don’t know and pass out in a puddle of their own piss. Twoje zdrowie indeed 🤨
@@lotuselise4432 If you can still pronounce 'spirytus rektyfikowany,' you can have another shot
I was married in Cork and all I remember from the reception is that they handed me a pint glass of Powers on my way in, and there was a band and there was dancing. I think my wife was there too
😆
“‘Cause you don’t know how long that ceremony’s gonna take.”
Everyone who’s ever been to (or been part of) a Catholic wedding felt those words in the bottom of their heart…and liver.”
I was thinking the same thing about Catholic weddings (with no disrespect intended). I was in one for a very good friend and had attended one several years before that. They're really beautiful, just long. lol
@@ChrisSunHwa I was raised Catholic and spent six years as an altar boy, so I’ve attended quite a few Catholic weddings throughout my childhood. In essence, it’s a full-length mass PLUS a wedding ceremony, so hour-and-a-half or more easy, depending on the priest.
Lol, im High Church of England, the service is two words max different from a Catholic Mass (i know i went to a RC school and all the services therein) we had two bishops involved etc as my wife is RC so no problem everyone was happy until (a) the ceremony and mass went on super long (lol) i was an altar boy so they pulled out all the stops. And (b) i Got married on cup final day. So a lot of the guys had radios with earpieces, while the wives got very huffy when looking at their SO's.
The Drinking went well though - loadsa victims including my Brother in law who got smashed before his speech. Lol great day 26 years ago. 😁😂😂
I argue that you know exactly how long they’re going to take and the answer is too long can I please have dinner now
@@cjb97245 no because we didn't ask, the only people who felt huffy were non church goers. Though as neither of us are football fans we did not know the situation was re the football religion. A young couple also mentioned that they were cold - because although it was May and bright and sunny - the church is made of stone and some brick, so that and the size meant it took forever to heat up.
My parents are from Ireland and when people asked him, if they had 4th of July in Ireland, he replied "why yes we do, we also have the 5th,6th, all 31 days infact". Or if a co-worker asked him if he liked their new suit, he replied "it's beautiful, too bad they didn't have it in your size". 😂 I think the accent let him get away with it, I miss my parents.
Us irish like to take the piss out of each other as in joke. So if your father was ripping into them people that just means he likes them. Me and my mates will literally greet each other with alright Shithead lol
Im irish and I have to say, the July joke is kind of true, I drink alot when I have the time to
Once he said about the deep internal desire to "take the piss" at genuine questions I realized that that is indeed genetic and that you don't have to have actually lived in Ireland for that trait to spring up. I'm adopted, Irish, my family is Belgian and German and I infuriate my relatives with each interaction AND I LOVE IT! Only my German dad gets me and will riff with me.
@@rosequartz4102 Yes, I'm Irish on both sides but born in NY the sarcasm has come naturally to me since birth. I once made an Irish Priest and Nun howl with laughter, with a smart ass remark I gave them in chapel, when I was in the second grade. Good times.
With a thick Irish accent it's likely they don't understand a word you just said ;)
Had an elderly man as a patient and he would tell us that he was from Cork and when he was born they took the cork out and haven't stopped drinking since...he was about 90 years old and funny as can be.
Haha brilliant
The Irish must be the wittiest people on earth.
They have such fantastic delivery of jokes, stories and phrases that comes so naturally to them
Friend of mine in Cork used to say about drink "one isn't enough, two is too many, but three isn't half enough at all, at all". :o)
For those that don't know, when you get a kidney transplant they do not remove the defective kidneys. They just make room for a good one. Which is why his brother has three.
Oh! Thanks for this. Was confused by that line. TIL.
why that greedy bastard!
I thought that was a joke lol
til
Lolllll
Thank you.
My brother had to do a medical for a job. The Dr asked asked how many drinks he had a day, 4 he answered, I'll put 2 says the Dr, next time just lie.
I did says my brother.
I was told that doctors assume we'll lie about any sorts of diet, exercise, smoking, etc, questions, so they automatically make it twice as bad as whatever we say. 😂
Lol, was just at the docs the other day. I actually told the truth.
As an RN I was told by doctors early in my career that you always doubled the amount they claimed they drank!
Damn, I am absolutist, never smoked or used any drugs. I eat very healthy (no dairy, sugar, grains etc.).
So are you telling me that all this does not matter when I go and see a doctor next? 😂😂😂
@@SatumainenOlento with THAT LIFESTYLE you should NEVER SEE a doctor!🍻
I lived with my Norwegian girlfriend in Oslo for many years, and it always amused me the amount of psychiatrists in Norway, pages upon pages of them in the phone book and to which she thought was perfectly normal.
I found it very funny, perfectly understandable knowing her, but yet equally astounding........ with her continually insisting Ireland cannot be any different.
Upon return to my home in Ireland, I lifted the 'yellow pages' and showed her - 7 entries. Just seven.
She asked how that was possible, to which I told her if an Irishman has some psychiatric issue, he goes into a pub, tells someone, they tell everyone else, so the problem is gone.
Hence, what do we need psychiatrists for!
That's apart from the fact we Irish already know that we are merely one cousin away from utter lunacy to start with!
"one cousin away from utter lunacy", this got me rolling 🤣🤣🤣!!!
I’m not even Irish and I am one cousin away from complete lunacy. Weelll, I guess by DNA I am mostly Irish so there’s that. 😆
I sense some tommy tiernan in this. I do do.
Freud said the Irish are impervious to psychoanalysis
You will never see a Motorcycle parked outside a Psychiatrists office.
When I went to the Oktoberfest, I went with three of my friends on a coach trip and we stayed at a hotel in the Austrian Alps. We were the four English lads, and there was a group of four Irish lads, and four Australian lads. The Aussies were absolutely full of themselves and decided that they wanted to challenge us and the Irish to a drinking competition. I wasn't interested, we weren't into the drink that much (aside from Neil) and we became known as the group that stank of weed, but the Irish took up the challenge without a shred of arrogance. We all know how this ends. The Aussies were throwing up and fucked off to bed while the Irish were swimming in a freezing lake. One of them nearly got into trouble, he had to sit in a warm shower for half an hour to fend off hypothermia. Naturally he was drinking in the shower while warming back up. The Aussie lads were a bit quieter the next day, like the arrogance had been sapped out of them.
I was in Munich for it a few years back at the festival with mates, bumped into a few lads from Newcastle who were tokers we had a smoke or two, a group of aussies challenged us to a drink off we drank them under the table and smoked the geordies off the planet next morning at breakfast there was a lot of sore and sorry looking heads not the irish lads we were drinking a beer with breakfast gotta love the geordies though they gave it a good go
@ong bonger as a part Irish kiwi, mate I laughed at this yarn
As an Australian I'm ashamed of our behaviour most of the time, but especially when we're overseas. We're like the belligerent teenagers of the world, we think we know everything and can do everything, but in reality we're just awful. So, with that as a preface here's a couple of stories.
My wife is Irish, and we have made many trips to visit her family in Ireland. On my first trip, my wife's father and brothers took me out to an Irish pub one afternoon, hoping (I think) to watch me be repulsed by Guinness and make a fool of myself. Unbeknownst to them I was no stranger to Guinness, having developed a taste for it years earlier, before I met my wife. Between 2pm and 10pm that afternoon I drank 11 pints, and kept up with them no problems. Needless to say we all walked home the long way that evening, and I was a bit average the next morning and hoping like mad that this wasn't a daily thing with them. At breakfast my father-in-law said "ah sure, we'd heard you Aussies fancied yourselves as drinkers, we were testing you yesterday, and we'll not be testing you again." I'm happy to say I passed their test, and it was back to a much more manageable 5 - 6 pints per day after that. What I didn't tell them was that the Guinness in Ireland is fucking DELICIOUS and I could drink that stuff all day, and have done on more than one occasion.
The other story is more recent, and speaks to Australian reputation overseas. We were in Ireland again for a wedding (nephew was getting married), I'd been suffering with a terrible flu for a few days and the day of the wedding I was finally starting to feel a bit better so I thought the best thing to do was to do what everyone else does at Irish weddings and down a few. Late into the evening the groom and his mates had had enough of pints and were hitting the shots, and the groom very kindly asked me if I'd like to join them. This was many years after the 11 pints story so I was well accepted by the families. The lads were all drinking tequila, which I'm not really a fan of, so I asked if my shots could be Irish Whisky instead, and away we went, glug glug glug. Many shots later some of the lads were starting to look a bit green so to spare everyone any indignity I called it a night and went to the bar for a glass of water before heading to bed (I found out later it got very messy with fellas puking everywhere so I bailed just in time it seems). I waited my turn in the queue at the bar, and when I got to the front I politely asked for water, and the barmaid asked "Are you Australian?" (my accent gives it away). I nodded, and she said "well, you're far more polite than the last bunch of Aussies we had in here". OUCH.
There are some places in the world I've been where I thought probably the best thing to do was to not say anything, because as soon as people hear the accent they instantly form an opinion which is not complimentary. I've tried to be as polite, kind, and well behaved as I can be, in some vain hope I can undo some of the damage that's been caused by my bone-headed compatriots. On behalf of all Australians, I apologise. Some of us are quietly spoken and thoughtful, and yes, some of us CAN drink.
It's a strange thing to be ashamed of your country and who you are, but there it is. I just try to not be another obnoxious Aussie. Hopefully someone somewhere remembers me well from my overseas travels.
@@woopimagpie Well, Australians (and New Zealanders as well) are now well known for traitorous, anti-Australian, anti-people politicians, government and police than anything else. I would expect more resistance than comply. It seems there is no Crocodile Dundee in Australia anymore.
@@woopimagpie I've been to Ireland and yes the Guinness is wonderful. Don't apologise for your nation, I'm quick to take the piss out of Aussies but let's not pretend the English are a well respected bunch on the international stage. We have football hooligans and topless toothless idiots who shout insults at locals, many British people are a complete embarrassment. But we have lots of lovely people here too, and plenty who can handle alcohol, know when to call it a night, and aren't rude to locals when travelling.
In my experience, Aussies are boisterous, they enjoy a drink and a laugh. When you combine those two things, often the laughs come at someone else's expense, and an Aussie loves nothing more than a joke at the expense of Pommies!
My favourite RUclipsr is an Aussie, by the way. Ozzy Man, I'm sure you know who he is but if not check him out. He single handedly repairs a lot of the reputational damage done to Australia by drunken fools! Funny guy, and nice guy.
I went to Ireland to stay in Dungarven. There was a wedding on at the hotel where I was staying. 7am in the morning we head wearily down to breakfast as the coach was taking us back to the ferry in Dublin. I heard noises coming from the wedding reception room and thinking 'Good grief, there must be a few die hard stragglers there'. Peeped in, only to find the wedding was still going at full pelt, full on dancing, crowded hall and everyone still drinking. Now I'm from Liverpool but that is hardcore!
As a dialysis patient with a family full of people who have received kidneys, I want to thank you for giving your brother a kidney. Its not an easy thing to do. You are an Amazing Person.
Hope you are ok Samantha. Are you close to getting a donor?
@@jigserdotcom i am choosing not to right now. I do very well on nocturnal dialysis. I look forward to the future when They can 3D print kidneys that wont require all of the immunosuppressant medication.
@@PolySammo can you imagine if that day ever came about. Please take care and stay safe Samantha’s.
@Ithecastic Oh just shut up. That has nothing to do with this conversation. I pity your sad little life that you have to go around policing other people's RUclips photos for political beliefs you don't like.
@Ithecastic Who the fuck cares what you're groundbreaking research uncovered?! Who researches someone who comments about having kidney disease and feels the need to publicly dismiss and judge them because of who they are. A vindictive jerk who can't resist personally attacking someone who is physically ill, that's who. 😒
In the six months I lived in Dublin it struck me how many words the Irish used for drunk. I was at my friend's family's place and suggested we go through the alphabet to see if they could come up with a different word starting with each letter. Within a second they'd come up with arseholed, bollocksed and c*nted. A few months later I was in London and read in the newspaper that, in fact, drunk has more words and terms in the English language by far than any other phenomenon including sex. I'd never noticed though till I lived in Ireland - I'm Australian.
You can basically use any noun and apply it to yourself. "Oh ya i was lampshaded"
@@variansv Excellent!
Drunk, Elephants, Flutered, Gee eyed, hoola hooped, Inebriated, Jarred, kak eyed, lamped, Mashed... fuck it I'm going for a pint I'm irish by the way
@@pauldrennan1482 LOL. I remember elephants in the list. I thought the person who said it simply made it up to get a word starting with e ... but obviously not!
It's like that thing that the Inuits have 100+ words for different snow and ice but for alcohol abuse
“This is a people for whom psychoanalysis is of no use whatsoever.” - Sigmund Freud (about the Irish)
'the Irish are a mass of contradictions and impervious to the rational thought processes that might resolve them'
Is the Freud quote true?? If so, it's hilarious. How did you come across it?
@@DanFan2042 nah, it’s not. It’s a widely shared quote but there is no evidence he ever said it.
@@DanFan2042 I think I seen somewhere that one of his students said it in some publication and it somehow became attributed to him.
I was once working at a beer festival in Manchester, serving pints, halfs and thirds. The section was run by this tiny little woman, who spent the night either finishing a pint or refilling one. It was incredible. I've never seen anyone put away so much beer in so short a period of time. I remarked about it to a guy I was working with. He said "Oh, she's from the Isle of Man" and walked away as if that explained it all.
my Dad, as a thirteen year old in 1937, went to the isle of Man from Ireland with two older brothers, to pick potatoes one season. He told me the locals were quite rough.. especially the women. lol. At least the ones he met spud picking.. I am sure not all Manx are like that. lol. When i was 14 in 190 we lived in Gloucestershire and cousins a bit older than me.. boys.. we earning a fortune spud picking.. so i wanted to go. Dad point blank refused and said. not with those rough women. I am not having you mixing with women like that NO. he clinched the argument by telling me fields had rats in them.. put me off. lol.
This is killing me. I’m American. That said, when asked about my heritage by a friend, my answer was, Irish, Scottish, German, with a little Native American. He looked me dead in the eye and said “you were destined to be sitting on a bar stool pissed off about something “ 😂😂😂😂
Love it. 😂😂😂
Uh oh. That's my heritage as well, and I've never drunk alcohol in my life...am I in trouble?
@@StarboyXL9 😂 it’s probably better that way!
🤣🤣🤣
👌
Better than a fella I know who’s mothers a wasp and fathers Catholic Irish. Fellas the embodiment of the troubles pre good Sunday
I had a Slavic patient who came in for alcohol excess. He seemed remorseful and said he was willing to ´give up alcohol’ and agreed to seeing the Alcohol Liaison Team. It turned out on deeper conversation that he was only going to stop drinking hard drinks but don’t count beer and vodka as alcohol so yeah, he’ll keep drinking those. 😆 Just amusing how some cultures love their alcohol.
I mean it's drank with food so that doesn't count. it's a beverage like soda or coffee.
Not as amusing as an "Alcohol Liaison Team". Poor guy. I guarantee he wanted a drink (or seven) after spending 5 minutes with those people. Anybody would.
@Frry Fury
Beer is regarded as a soft drink in Central and Eastern Europe....
Vodka is pretty hard. Also beer if it's drank from morning to night.
@@annabell3385
I will repeat, for the hard of comprehension;
"Beer is regarded as a soft drink in Central and Eastern Europe...."
A) Where is vodka mentioned?
B) Vodka is a distilled spirit, which starts at 43% alcohol by volume(abv).
Beer "...in Central and Eastern Europe...." goes up to about 6% abv. The normal range is 4.3-5%.
I'm an American. My grandparents were Irish immigrants. We paid for our wedding bar by the hour, not the drink or per person (the other option). I think we won on that equation in the first of 4 hours. Our guests drank A LOT. That's the point of wedding receptions. Unless you are a kid. Then it's cake.
Thank for calling yourself what you are (American) and not pretending to be Irish just because your grandparents were (doesn’t count).
You would have to be from an amish family and be friends with only nerdy people for that to be the wrong choice, between per hour or per drink.
@@hannahcorinne5388 wait one Irish ancestor in 1752 doesnt mean Irish? Welp.
@@hannahcorinne5388 I’ve seen this misunderstanding so often. When americans of X descent say X-American they don’t mean they are from the country, have citizenship, or anything like that. They are simply honoring where their ancestors came from. And that’s usually passed down from those ancestors, so it’s often coming from those people from X.
maybe you could honor them and move back
You know it's an Irish wedding when the old men break out the spoons and accordian at 6am for a few more hours of festivities after the DJ has long gone home.
That could be the after party a few days later once everyone has physically recovered for a lighter round 2, at least regarding my family
Ah the singsong in the residents bar...... last man standing
Never seen this ever and have been to a tonne of weddings here
At my wedding, my in laws didn't want any drinking until after the ceremony, (they didn't want to see alcohol in the photos.) I was getting ready to walk down the isle, (T minus 15 mins) and my best man goes "Hey I guess your wife's family is on the left?" I replied "yes why" He said "where is your family?" looking up there were a few of my friends on my side but no family. I went around the corner to where the reception area was, and everyone of my family had at least a beer or glass of wine in their hand. My dad had gone behind the bar and started serving everyone. He saw me and said "There was no bartender yet so I decided to help out."
Jesus. As a girl from Iowa who doesn't have an Irish bone in her body, the drinking questions hit my orthodox Christian raised soul. Except you have to know Midwest-speak. "Do you drink?" "No, yeah. I mean, I have the occasional drink." Translation: "Yeah. I drink. The fuck you think. I live in a small town in the middle of nowhere."
Must be so strange cause the middle of nowhere in the uk is the countryside for you yanks it’s just deserts 😂
@@mr.crowgamer6250 well the US is a pretty big country. "Nowhere" in Oklahoma is flat and dry, "nowhere" in Washington State is hilly and forested and rainy, and I imagine "nowhere" in the Midwest is farmland without any cities nearby.
Not an Irish bone in your body, eh? Well call me if you'd care for one...
Exactly 👍🏻
@@mr.crowgamer6250 You clearly have never been to the U.S. if you think it's just deserts outside the cities.
Ohhh I love the Irish!!!!!!
I have a friend who’s heritage is Scotch -Irish, and one day his grandpa, who is from Ireland says, “ Sonny you’ve got a problem you’re Scotch-Irish. That means half of you is gonna want to drink and the other half isn’t going to want to pay for it.” 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 TOO FUNNY
Hilarious!
🤣🤣🤣
Haha
People from scotland aren't called Scotch
@@garyreid8082 when it’s a hyphenate with Irish it is Scotch-Irish.
I'm part Scottish so we like to tip a few back and then follow up with a few more. I went to an Irish wedding and thought I was keeping up fairly well. I woke up some time later underneath a pool table, clutching the rack and the cue ball. My date was several feet away passed out but propped up against the wall. Someone asked me if I needed a ride home. I was sure I did. He asked where I lived and I answered feebly "Where am I now?"
Mate, you switch flawlessly from an Irish accent to an American accent. Great bit, loved it.
Thanks man.
Kind of like Rory McIlroy or gmac! Lol
It was flawless
Great observation, as someone only living for the last thirty years in the United States (native tongue: Spanish) that was hard to catch for me , thanks!
I'm Australian and this reminds me of a conversation I had with my doctor. She asked how many standard drinks do you have a month. I said 30-40. she said "oh that's not too bad, how often do you drink." I said maybe twice a month. She just responded "Jesus."
Mostly schooners and bottles with the Aussies though, you're not big on pints. Irish, but lived in Aus for 10 years.
@@musashidanmcgrath Don't get the pots of beer at all.
I wish American doctors would say 30-40 drinks a month were not too bad😂😂! Good thing I had my daddy and grandma for reassurance 😂
This is the most accurate description of Irish wedding drinking I've ever heard! 😂😂😂
Thank you 🙏
I was at an Irish wedding last year. It started with a party on the Thursday night then an all day sess on Friday. Saturday was the wedding and it started at lunchtime and we were still drinking singing and dancing till 4am. Sunday was another party with the bride and groom still there. Monday the bride and groom were gone but we raised a few glasses until the early hours singing and telling funny stories about them. It took me a month to detox and sweat the alcohol out of my system. The hotel must have made a fortune they even opened a small function room up for the kids and showed cartoons and laid on a free finger buffet and juice. Best wedding EVER I'll never forget it 🥳🍺🍾🥂🍷🍸🍻🥃🍹💃
Weddings are nothing compared to funerals :P
Amazed you COULD remember it :D
it's like springbreak, only that you have to be registered as a professional drinker to attend. Like a pro-league for drinkers
"not like i'm from a country with a history of terrorism" LOL well played.
I'm sure the native Americans would disagree
@@jackietreehorn5561 he is talking about the Irish. Go learn some history about "The Troubles". And yes, North and South American countries were founded on terrorism and genocide of Indigenous people.
@@jackietreehorn5561 Huh? The joke was about the Irish, not the Americans.
@@kenharvey8161 and that quote is open to interpretation depending which side you come from
Y'all, he's talking about terrorism IN Ireland/bombings. Conflict between protestants and catholics. Look it up.
I love this guy. Dark humor is like food. Not everyone gets it.
but everyone needs it
@@ultimatesin5 no they don't. Prove it. #Thanoswasright
@@ultimatesin5 oh you said needs not deserves...
Just got back from a Polish wedding, in Poland, naturally. Polish weddings operate on a cycle of 1) a full meal is served 2) toasts and vodka shots 3) dancing and beer. This cycle is repeated every 2-3 hours throughout the evening, until first light about 3:30 in the morning.
it was light wedding, I'm from Poland and step 3) is more like vodka and dancing on a loop until you can stand lol
@@soulfulfool Ha! I believe you - we got off easy! Sounds like good fun though - if I were 20 years younger! You Pols know how to party!
They are allowed to be out after 10pm in Poland? Wow... they must have more rights than people in new york now.
Sounds like amazing fun!!
How about the second day of the wedding though? The 'poprawiny' day. Certainly a tradition in the part of Poland where I grew up.
Omg my poor husband is trying to sleep in the next room and I am pissing myself with laughter here, trying not to wake him up. This was great, thank you! I love how you imitate not only the accent but the tremendous sincerity of the American doctors. And I love how you describe wanting to just cut loose with the sarcasm, omg that was just hilarious.
Yes, well, the first thing i always look for in a doctor is tremendous INsincerity...
That's not just an Irish trait. I'm Welsh; even on social media the temptation to let rip with the irony sometimes gets the better of me. Sometimes I can hear the whooshing sound, as it flies over the top of their head too. That makes it even more special. (edited to remove an errant semi colon)
@@nannyogg2586 I'm Irish and spent a lot of time in Wales and love the jungle juice as much as us Irish
The worst part is, being in America, speaking sarcasm as a second language, then having a foreign doctor who absolutely, positively DOES NOT understand sarcasm.
@nanny I’m an American who loves dry humor and sarcasm and sometimes feel like a foreigner here because of that lol
I enjoy Brit humor more than American probably for that reason….
Thanks for the laugh.
I'm a recovered alcoholic, and when someone asks if I used to drink in the morning, it always raises more questions when I explain that the time of day was irrelevant, the fact is that my eyes were open and I'd just continue drinking 🍻.
(PS I'm over 7 years sober, so it's just normal 😀)
I straight out respect anyone who says out loud how long they've been sober. "First the man takes a drink, then the drink takes the man", etc. But I was a 20 a day smoker, and to be honest quitting was the hardest thing I've ever done. Life is about learning.
@@cmonkey63 I quit smoking a few years ago and I've increased by two belt sizes 🤔.
How do you feel after quitting smoking? (Heavier 🤣)
Life is good ✌️
@@mattsmedley.onehandedgamin9029 I had a friend who quit smoking and he quickly gained a stone, but cycled like mad till he lost it. I put on a bit of weight, but it's coming off. Common.
Respect sir...total respect...I had a friend who gave up the demon...carried 12rstep book in his car.
Ğave up the booze,sold his goldwing honda.
Next thing we know, he's got himself a good big car, a caravan and a large touring canoe with sail et al...
He passed within 2 years...
Hamba kahle jonnie.
@@howler6490 to he honest alcohol is a curse...no doubt in my mind if it was only discovered today it would be 100 percent illegal...just engrained in the human culture for 1000s of years and the most dangerous drug of them all and sold everywhere...
His American accent is not getting NEARLY enough credit for how accurate and funny it is
Even after 150 of living in America the Irish, along with the German, descendants of my little community have retained these same drinking habits. My dad grew up in a Methodist family and his mom didn't approve of alcohol, so it was quite the shock for them at my parent's wedding when they witness all my mom's relations drinking like it's the last night on earth.
Your telling me! My dad is from scotland (we live in canada) and my mom's family are jehovah's witnesses and they believe being drunk is a sin. You can imagine the shock and horror as a bunch of JWs are watching like 50 scottish giants drink like their going to war! 😂 needless to say my dad isnt very popular with my moms side of the family 😂😂😂
Laughing through the flashbacks to a 2003 wedding in Cavan that I nearly didn't survive. My NYC party girl skills did not measure up.
😂😂😂 Honestly, the comments under this clip make me so happy. Thanks Jocasta. Cavan is the Vegas of Ireland🤪 Jar x🙏
I would not say we drink a lot at danish weddings... BUT my stepdad DID have a mutual drunken fight with a groom twice, before 10 p.m. at a midday wedding. My 2 aunts both got married in their own gardens. So yes, he fought my uncles.
Det lyder interessant 😁
His brothers or hers?
I, an American Irishman and former bartender of almost 20 years, donated a kidney to my father many years ago. At that time I had a very similar conversation with not one, but 3 or 4 doctors. You see, donating can take time. From the first test to the time we actually did the transplant was roughly 3 years. When the first doctor asked me if I drink I asked "what days?"
"What do you mean what days?" the doctor inquired.
"Well, I only drink when I work."
" You drink at work? Are you saying you're an alcoholic?" She was very concerned.
" No, I'm a bartender. I only drink at work because I usually drive when me and the boys go out. I have the biggest car. But I can take a cab home from work for $8 with tip. So I only drink at work to avoid a DWI"
" OH. Well, that's actually smart. Okay then, well how much do you drink at work then? "
" Well, a couple shots. People usually buy them for me. Some beer, and about half a bottle. "
Her brow kinda furrowed as she asked "half a bottle a beer?"
"Um no,.. no...ahhh, half a bottle. Of the creature, you know."
"The creature?" She was utterly confused.
"Yes, you know, whiskey. The creature. About half a bottle."
"Hold on, you drink half a bottle of whiskey, a couple shots and a maybe a beer?"
" Ahhh, yeah. Yep. BUT, you know, that's like an 8 hour shift. So I mean really, it's not that much. it's only like 2 shots an hour."
" Sir, that IS a lot." Now she was writing on my chart, or in her book, or I don't know, but that pen was moving, boy. I could HEAR the scribbles so I decided I better make it sound better.
"Well, I mean, it might seem like a lot, but I only work 3, maybe 4 days a week. so it's not like this is an everyday thing."
I could hear the pen letting out just enough ink to scrawl Three...to...fourrrrr...nights.a. week.
"Um, okay, Sir. Well, let's just... move on a bit here. Do you do any drugs?" She lifted her face from the questionnaire page, chin fully up, squared off, and staring directly at me.
"Nooooooooo. No ma'am. no. I drink too damn much for that. You ever mixed drugs with half a bottle of whiskey? it doesn't make for a good night."
So, American. Not Irish.
@@thert.hon.thelordnicholson7261 Or an Irish guy in America.
Can I get a donation for having to read all of that?
@@thert.hon.thelordnicholson7261 I was gonna say the same thing
@@AM2K2 Ah, it was a good craic, reading that, for me. (And I'm zero Irish inherently.) You didn't think? And now you know what "the creature" is.
Few years ago i was working on an American lady's house in London and she remarked that my accent was different to the other guys working on the job. I explained that i was Irish to which she said she had Irish friends in the states and that they are very athletic to which i replied they're not the ones i know. She then remarked they also like a drink to which i replied now they're the ones i know well.
I used to be a live sound engineer, and I remember working with a lighting tech from Cork. We had an American act on the tour with us, so between myself and the LX lad, we're challenging them to drinking games, acts of sheer disregard for our livers and kidneys, and all the while drinking them under the table.
They asked us "but how do you do this?!", my answer "I'm Northern English, and brought up Catholic, my dad one of ten, there was a lot opportunities as a teen to get absolutely ruined at family events."
The LX guy? "Unlike you yanks, I'm actually Irish and my da runs a pub. I then spent many months with Lemmy and Motorhead, so my liver is battle hardened to put you in your place"
Irish musician here... I think you sold us a bit short there 🤣. True story: In London and a few English guys said to us Irish, 'Let's go on the lash!' An hour later we were on the third pint and starting on the whiskey and they're sitting with their first HALF pint. The banter was flying. They got really quiet and one said, 'You're really rude to each other!' We nearly died laughing as they quietly went home. Naturally, we started singing. The landlord was so pleased we were locked in until 4am. The English guys couldn't believe it when we turned up for work that morning bright and cheerful as ever. By ten am we were stuffing our faces with a grilled breakfast and pots of strong coffee. One of the guys said, 'Ha ha, so you do have a hangover!' and my mate quickly said, 'Ach not at all, we're just lining our stomachs before tonight's sess. Are you not coming?' The look on the other guys face ....... 🤣☘️
'You're really rude to each other!' This is something we outsiddrs find a bit tough to understand!
@@pazza4555 Irish banter always has a thread of compassion under it. We never take it too far, unlike some... ☘️
"Are you not coming...??"😇😅🤣😇😅🤣😇😅🤣😇😅🤣
I’m of Irish descent and this is so funny because the habits remain in the diaspora multiple generations deep - I thought everyone was like this and all weddings were like ours and baptisms and funerals
Scottish weddings are similar. My brother and his wife are from opposite ends of Scotland, we started the drinking in the Scottish Borders, and ended a week and a half later in Orkney. I honestly thought I was going to die from alcohol poisoning.
😅🤣😅
Sounds mental
🤣🤣🤣
😂
Funny you should say this. Mine’s is an Irish family and growing up I remember my sister going out with a guy from one of the islands off Scotland. He and his friends brought drunkenness to a fine art. They would take pride in being drunk for more days than their friend. Neither of my parents drank so it was a bit gobsmacking to see. 😮
Irishman living in Austria. Two of my Irish friends got married there a few years back, and the groom recounted asking the guy in charge of the hotel (for the reception) if they had enough alcohol for the guests. He was assured that yes, they had plenty. Groom then casually mentions that all of the guests would be consuming at least 15 drinks. He sees the whites of the Hotel manager's eyes who says, "I had better get some more in, then". They still ran out of beer that evening.
Headed back to a hotel in town for the afters, and the very innocent bar staff decided that it would be a good idea to leave the bar at closing time with 200 Irish there, with the taps still on. Groom was presented with a bill for several hundred euros the next morning, which he managed to negotiate down 50 per cent.
For Ireland and Scotland the an alcoholic is someone who drinks more than their doctor does.
Scottish doc told me that one.
When I had glandular fever I was seeing the doctor every week so got to know him quite well. After about five weeks I popped in he said hi I’m glad it’s you. Do you mind if I have a drink. He then took out a bottle of scotch and two glasses. Do you fancy a quick one as well? It wasn’t even 9.00am 😂. After that he always had a drink when I went in. I found out he was a raging alcoholic
Currently watching this in Ireland hungover to bits after a serious drink-drinking session at a cousins wedding yesterday. I actually think I might still be drunk tbh 😅
Two (True!) Irish drinking stories:
A co-worker told me that his grandfather died early on a Thanksgiving day. Rather than spoil the day of food, drinks and revelry, the family decided not to call the coroner. A couple strong brothers took Pappy - still in his pajamas and bathrobe, and pushed he in the chair up to his usual place of honor at the table. Celebrations continued as tho he was still part of the festival. I think the Irish have a different view on death than other cultures.
My grandmother told me that as a young woman she went to an Irish wake. The fellow who died was displayed standing up in a corner with a beer in his hand. He was wrapped in festooned and everyone paid their regards as they felt he would want them. It turned out that the fellow must have been a Crazy partier!..
"Standing in a corner, holding a beer"
He died like he lived :D
I was on the other side of the equation... American in Ireland, trying to explain that " when I said I didn't drink, it means I never drink alcohol at all."
Now that’s a tough. Harder than turning down tea. Hope it worked out ok for you Goatmeal🙌🇮🇪
@@jigserdotcom thank you! All fine. "Ah. Well then. We might have a wee bit of a problem." Edit: typo
Pregnant or antibiotics?
Ive never drunk alcohol im 52. Never interested me. It melted the heads of many when i lived in UK.... but your irish was the cry..... i also have 5 sisters who could outdrink any man in their prime. They used to claim i was adopted but i look like my dad only in drag........ and i dont drink tea or coffee either......
Loved this. Don't know about Ireland, but in the USA, hospital staff come up to you if you're there for ANY reason and start asking you about how much you drink. "Broke your toe? So how many drinks do you have each week? Do you have more than 2 drinks each night?" The assumption seems to be, you're there because - somehow, some way - alcohol got you there.
They probably want a head's up if you're going to have a case of the DT's (delirium tremors). Best case scenario, you're seeing pink elephants. Worst case, you're punching out the nurse. If you're an alkie, they'll make sure you get a medicinal amount to avoid that.
@@martha3445 Great point.
It’s even worse if you admit to any drug use whatsoever.
Yup, same with smoking. The fake Hoity toity persona at an institution in the states is certainly not the reflection of the average joe/Jane. Especially in our inhumane medical industry. If you're in between jobs (ie. not insured), ya might end up being the spare parts.
I'm Irish-American and after my wedding it took my uncle three full days to realize he had fallen and separated his shoulder... because he was still drunk and partying for those three days.
😂😂
Completely normal
Standard behavior
Hey pal, we're all Irish American
Irish Americans don't count, you're just American
I don’t know you. But I love you. That was such a kind thing to do. So glad you were a medical match for him. He’s lucky to have you as a brother.
I have a much older colleague born in Greece who told me he had to fill out a questionaire for U.S. citizenship. There was a problem because he checked two boxes on one question.
The Question: "Do You DrinK?"
The two boxes he checked:
"Not Often"
"To Excess"
;-p
The closest I ever came was a Scottish wedding and it resembled your description. First and only time i have experienced Drink until Sober. So... I am scared to be invited to an Irish wedding.
What makes this guy's material so good is it is so true. Most Americans have NEVER seen or experienced anything like an Irish wedding. This guy's material is (ironically) no joke and no exaggeration.
...and some of these wedding receptions can go on for days! No joke. No exaggeration.
I appreciate that he put up subtitles to help us get through the accent.
I’m a 5th generation Australian and I have to say my family all still drink like the Irish at weddings… the genes are strong
This is funny. As an ex-Mormon I also use the term drink-drinking. Going out for a drink means soda (not coffee, tea, alcohol since those were never allowed). So I say I need a drink-drink when it means it has alcohol. People look at me weird but my exmormons know :) Also, I would love to experience an Irish wedding one day 🥹
Do you mind me asking why you're not allowed drink tea or coffee, genuinely curious. Ah irish weddings are great craic 😆
@@theirishcailin333 The original prophet Joseph Smith said god told him drinking tea and coffee was bad for them, and so ordered the followers they couldn’t. (Now I’m sure you can understand why I’m ex-Mormon 😂)
We say drink-drinking too, as Irish. "Drinking" on it's own is just regular binge drinking. Drink-drinking involves hospitalisation for alcohol poisoning, or getting arrested, or passing out naked, etc. Sometimes all of the above
The wake in Ireland is a big one too. At my great granny's wake the session went for the week. They piled all the furniture outside under a tarp to make room in the tenement. This was before my time, but my father said every pot and saucepan was being used for whiskey at one stage. This was inner city Dublin and by the end of the week nobody even noticed all the furniture had been stolen. 🤣🤣
1. Irish wake for my grandfather Joe Purcell with our Canadian Irish relatives was one of the biggest parties our subdivision has ever seen, people and length of time. 2. My wedding to another Irishman, lovely man. But the wedding festivities began on Wednesday morning for the Saturday wedding and ended Monday morning. I had an Official Bridal Beer Holder. The reception spilled over into the hotel rooms then the Coney Island restaurant for breakfast, then whiskey for some hair of the dog that bit ya, then hubby's friends harassing or teasing us and dancing with the new wifey, then back to parents to celebrate our marriage and say good bye to all the visiting relatives. 5 days. We're still here 22 years later.
As an Irish-American, I knew that the sarcasm was strong with me honestly
My brothers and cousins just waited for a funeral , to have playing cards and lots of liquor. This goes on all night. The women did the weekly prayers after the funerals and the men were quietly drinking until the bottles were empty. Weddings are another extensive three days events of lots of foods and drinks and merriment and loud music. This is in a tropical climate with lots of booze everywhere. Long weekends and baby's christening or engagement parties, special birthdays all turned out into exactly what JR said. He is hilariously wicked too !!
Tis a great and kind thing you've done for your brother! I'm a nurse in the States and I used to work in transplant surgery. Also from a large Irish-American clan, this was hilarious and accurate. Cheers, this one's for you! 🍻
One of my best mates had to leave the church in the middle of my first wedding to be sick in the churchyard, he was so drunk. The lightweight. The only occasion where more drink is drunk than an Irish wedding is an Irish funeral.
An Irish funeral is better CRAIC than an English wedding.........FACT.
@@breenwalshe7667 As an Englishman with an Irish wife I can confirm your comment.
Scottish weddings are the same
My partner's family are Australians of Irish descent, and he always says 'there's never been an Irish funeral where another man didn't die' 😂
Except an Irish funeral has one less drunk.....
Just had a friends wedding last month. All from Waterford. Met everyone the night before for a few casuals. Before I knew it I realised I had been drinking every night for a week. I was the videographer. Video turned out grand.
The psychology part of this answers one of my biggest dilemmas in life. I thought I was psychotic but now I know it's just the Irish in me. It's in my whole family. Here I thought we were all assholes.
Naaa, Just Irish! 😆
It’s midnight and I’m laughing so hard the dog has arisen and is anxiously standing next to the bed in concern for my well-being. 🤦♀️😆🤩😂
Love it😂😂
Your Minnesota accent is really good! Lots of people overdo it, but you got the shallow vowels, the "r" and the concerned undertone absolutely nailed!
From what I have experienced from the Irish community in Argentina I would say weddings... and funerals. Just brilliant routine. Thank you!
As we like to say in my family at either occasion: What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? One less drunken Irishman! and we down another for new lives beginning or for remembrance of the life we lost.
I worked as a temp waiter at an Irish wedding at a fancy hotel. The men made me drink with them. I tried to say I couldn't and be professional bit they surrounded me and pushed me to my knees in a circle (so the manager couldn't see?) and started handing me beer after beer screaming to chug it, so i did, then handed me shots, hooting and cheering at me. At one point there was a fight and a 12 top wooden table was flipped over so I managed to sneak away. (I mean if I really wasn't ok with it I'm assuming they wouldn't have actually forced me...). One of the craziest events I ever worked.
The storytelling here is on point. Top notch delivery. Such a great bit
I donated to my 25 year old daughter a few months ago. Hope you’re doing well and aren’t going to too many weddings ;) you’re brilliant 😂👏🏻
Thanks Claire and congrats to you. Well done.
@@jigserdotcom thanks so much man x
Hope you and your daughter are well!
@@thearchibaldtuttle thank you, that’s very kind. We are both doing well xx
Good for you both. What a lucky daughter she is to have you!
The night before I donated a kidney I had a drink and said “here’s to not donating a liver!”.
Brilliant bit!
My da told me he was invited to a wedding in the west of Ireland back in the 70s when he was working over there. He lost two days...🤣🤣🤣🍻🍻
Only two days?
I'm an American living in Australia & I'm quite use to seeing my Australian. Co-workers get *COMPLETELY* shattered at social engagements. But compared to my Irish co-workers they're teetotallers. I heard a *BRILLIANT* joke from one of my Irish co-workers about the reason *WHY* they drink so much. He said:
*"Well you see when God first created the world he went missing for a week & all the Heavenly Host were in a panic at to where he was. Eventually St. Michael & St Gabriel found him in a corner of Heaven. Looking down over the clouds smiling at something. They ran over to him & asked him where he'd been for a week. & he showed them the Earth & said:*
*'Lads come & look at what I just made! This place is gonna be great! It's gonna be full of contrast. For example Europe is gonna be very cold, but Africa is gonna be very hot. North America is gonna be very rich & South America is gonna be very poor.*
*But come here & look at this.' & he then proceeds to show them Ireland. 'This place is gonna be great! It'll produce poets, scholars, artists, athletes, great warriors, statesmen & saints. & they're gonna invent a famous brown beverage. That's gonna be a cross between a food & a liquid. & they'll be famous for it throughout the world!'*
*& St Michael said 'It sounds lovely Lord!' & St Gabriel said 'That it does, but Lord you said something about contrasts?' 'Aye' God said 'wait till you see the utter Bastards I'm gonna give them as neighbours!'* 🤣
Come on, the Scots aren't that bad.
Btw the 'brown drink' is actually deep red.
@@KaitainCPS i thought he meant the Welsh😂😂
@@stevelee9924 he definitely meant the English, because we Welsh tell the same joke (without the Guinness).
lmao ...too funny
Hmm. When I visited Cork as a young man, locals in pubs would point at me and say, "Look at the drunken American." After hearing this wonderful documentary on wedding drinking, I feel better about my sobriety now. Cheers!
New Zealand has picked up some of these irish wedding traditions. The drinking starts the day of and then doesn't stop for a few days. 21st birthdays and reunions also can go for days, my aunty had 21 kegs and 21 bottles of top shelf, that one lasted 4 days no one left till all the alcohol was gone.
Holy flip. That’s crazy stuff😂😂💪🇮🇪🇳🇿
Why didn't you call me?
@@curbmassa we did? Didn't you hear the 10 guitars karaoke being played on the hour every hour? It was a musical invitation, so if you could hear it, and drunk enough to sing along, you were invited.
The reason Aunty Marilyn got a 21 keg salute at her 21st, was because she made it to 21 without having a baby. Literally the only one to do so.
Blimey, I knew my family weren't big drinkers, but hearing about this and comparing it to every wedding I've been to (fellow Kiwi btw) and the ones to which I've been had fuck all booze lol
The 'old man jumping over the bar' reminds me of my friend's late Dad. He was the kind who'd have done exactly that. :) Dave taught me every drinking song I know, LOL! So, David, wherever you are now...Slainte!
I loved when he said that his brother was pleased to have a younger brother especially for the spare parts 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣👏👏👏👍
"How many drinks do you have?"
"Um...ALL of them?"
Seriously...I'm Scottish and the bartender was HORRIFIED when we arrived at the last wedding reception carrying our own mugs (open bar so none of this 'counting cups' shit).
That was beautifully delivered, why have I never heard of this gem.
Ireland is the only place I found myself having a board meeting - or part of one - in a pub. The meeting had either started in Navan and was moving to Dublin, or the other way round. I can't remember. half way along the road we suddenly drew up at a pub. Either someone wanted to use the facilities, or knew someone there, or had arranged to meet someone there: I can't remember. What I do remember is that we sat round this table and it seemed we were never going to leave. One person bought a round. That meant everyone had to. Someone would drink a little faster than the others and disappear to order a 'wedge' - an extra drink for himself that didn't count towards the rounds. Every now and then a new person would wander up, greet some friend, and then there would be another round.
Everyone seemed to know the etiquette.
Nobody stopped making sense. I can't remember how many cars, but someone must have driven the rest of the journey.
It took me a few days to recover.
Very standard stuff😂😂😂🙌❤️🇮🇪
How many drinks.. at a WEDDING ...with irish people... i was so glad to find i have irish family... explained a lot ....xxxxx love to all of yous xxx
Me and a drinking buddy went to a wedding reception. Was there over two hours when we realised we where at the wrong one .we just stayed great night 🥳
Friends of my dad did that. They even got up to sing realising only then the bride wasnt me
This is so damn good that I'm watching it on repeat and it gets better with time. Also I'm Polish and I believe you'd fit right in at our weddings. We are asking similar questions.
Hoping to do a few tour dates in Poland soon. Thanks Mr Green🇮🇪🇵🇱
@@jigserdotcom Now that's exciting. I hope I get to see you live then. Will definitely try to make one of the dates work with my schedule.
So similar
Enjoyed this a lot more than expected! Good job man
I once told a joke at an Irish wedding; There were two ducks flying over Belfast.
One says “Quack!”
The other says: “I’m going as Quack as I can!”
The line at the end was fookin' brilliance!
Subscribed. Sometimes the youtube algorithm works and recommends something unexpectedly great. This was one of those times. I wish your brother well and hope to see more of your comedy in the future. Pete
Thanks Peter. That is really kind of you. Brother is doing really well I’m happy to say.
I too have just watched this video for the first time and was laughing so hard as being half Irish and being the only girl who had to match drink for drink
😂🤣😂
Absolutely agree
This dude is hilarious! Glad I found him!
Almost everyone in any Irish pub on any given night
They put a pipe in your chest and get you on dialysis straight away. So there isn’t the urgency that people think. Awesome that you gave him a kidney. I had to wait for the magic phone call. But it came and life is goooooood. Hope you both have happy lives !
I mean, the absolute ideal time for a kidney transplant is just before you require dialysis.
I am sorry that your brother was sick enough to need a kidney. I hope he lives long and healthy. You are a trooper and I wish you good health. You are funny. From the 72 year old lady in the deep south in the USA.
Aw that's kind! I bet you guys have a great drinking culture and some amazing food down there in the south.
Never had there been a better description of a wedding. 🤣🤣🤣🤣
I come from an Irish family and all of this hits too close to home. I'm realizing I'm okay.... it's just my culture 🤣
It is definitely ok to stop consuming ethanol. I know.
This has turned a very bleak day into one where my laughter reminded me of who I am. Best Iv heard in years!! G-d bless you and the comments and your wee bro.🥰👍😀
Thank you for this. 🙌
Just brilliant!!!
God bless my recommendations for this treasure
My best friends wedding had 180 guests. He told me he bought alcohol for 24000 pounds(!), just to make sure it was enough. No bar, only bottles. Two weeks before the wedding I get a call from my friend and he says that he is going to get piss drunk in his wedding and asked me, kindly must I say, that he hoped I would help out. I am not kidding, but he rented a fucking lorry to pick up all the alcohol and it was loaded in and out with a forklift. It arrived about 15 mins before dinner, and the wedding couple arrived early after taking pictures, so my friend was there when it arrived. We and a couple of our friends stood together in the pouring rain watching the unloading, when the groom says with no sarcasm; "This is it guys, let`s go to work. If any of you remembers anything from after dinner until we wake up, you will have to pay for half of it." My wife stood right behind me, hearing and seeing everything. She took a step forward and said; " I`m going home, I`ll notice your work. Call me when you wake up." This was on saturday, I made the call to my wife on Tuesday... We rented the wedding band for 4 days straight... Can`t remember much, but had the time of my life!
You are hilarious, absolutely love your dark humor. What a shame your humor went over their heads. I have tears rolling down my face, I would have been on the freaking floor. Grew up w/an Irish family and brings me back right to them🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂
Utterly perfect
That three kidneys bit is great because most don’t know they don’t take out the dud kidney, usually they leave it in
I love when people that know get in touch about that line. 🤜🤛🇮🇪