How To Escape Self Improvement Hell
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- Опубликовано: 26 сен 2024
- How To Finally Escape The Never Ending Cycle Of Self Improvement
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In this video I talk about the concept of being plateaued. Most people always have ups and downs, stagnating in the long run.
We want to change this, so that we either improve incrementally, even when we are in a rut, by changing our standards and identity.
Or we can change by completely making our goal as our baseline standard, which is the lowest we can possibly tolerate. This is much harder though.
I highly recommend working through the sheet, as working on it alone will make more connections in your brain and you will remember and think about this concept more often during your days, so that you can actually use it to improve.
I hope you have a great day.
Music:
• Animal Crossing City F...
• 6 AM - Animal Crossing...
LMK if this helped: group.tobi-education.com.
If you want 1-on-1 help, check this out: www.tobi-education.com/program
People ain’t going to escape self improvement hell by buying some RUclipsrs course and program 😭
only thing that worked for me was 'Unveiling Your Hiidden Potential' by Bruce Thornwood
"You have to have something worth working for" oooooh boy, that's the real problem for so many of us guys.
it really is
It use to be to build a family and provide for them but society has made this extremely difficult
How's it made difficult in your opinion @@Warren_Lifts
@@Warren_Lifts Exactly man, I've been thinking about these for a few weeks. At the age of 23 I should be married or in a stable relationship, that love from my partner would give the the driving force to face my struggles as a man, the sheer thought of being happily married to a woman I love and have my kids with her will be my "release" in my difficult times I know the red pill community gonna come at me saying oh no you gotta build yourself, woman ain't everything, start semen retention bla bla but its all bullshit. Love drives and motivates men like nothing else..
But getting woman let alone being married in today's world is like shopping for a luxury car, and its getting even worse. Nobody wants a prospect, everyone wants a product. Back in the 60's an average worker could have a family full of kids. Nowadays both the man and the woman can have a job and still struggle to make the ends meet. This is the sad reality.
I fell sorry for you guys from Europe and America, i always hear that your society is f***ed up etc. As a young fella from Russia and you may not believe this, we have way less problems as you guys. Stay strong, life is going on and maybe in a month, a year or a decade you will have something worth working for.
Burnout speedrun any%
Real 😭
Always set the standard upper and upper, so you never reach the point of satisfaction with your persona and be in constant despise with yourself. Good instruction, but i would prefer living a life with happiness
thanks
I read once in a book: "Improvements are only temporary until they become part of who you are". For example: the goal is not to read a book, the goal is to become a reader.
What then defines a reader?
@@bruhman5829 to consistently read
Nice
Self improvement > stress > procrastination > repeat
Exactly, help please
@@Player_is_Ino one can help you except yourself and u need to realize that
Same I try but I get so stressed and will just procrastinate on everything
This seems helpful. Maybe if you surround yourself with people who only grow and only watch people who constantly show how they are growing, especially those similar age to you, you will be more motivated to grow (maybe not idk)
Create a new identity which have the lowest standards as your current highest standards
Just gotta slowly get better each day .if you try and achieve it instantly you will crash, allow yourself to relapse sometimes
Most single young men today are working like they have a loving wife and 4 kids to support. Your mental health with go up a lot if you stop working extra for nothing. Im not saying just give up and be lazy, but just live life on cruise control or autopilot and only put in as much work and effort as you need. If the prospect of having a family is damn near impossible, why the fuck should i still put in the work like i have a family?
Thnx mate
If you want to learn more about building good habits etc i can recommend atomic habits. It has much more to offer than just babit building.
Thanks man
Listen. The best way (for me) to fix my life was to become a femboy. I started caring about my body and going to the gym, i started getting educated in many diffrent topics and i were eating healthier.
I think everyone needs to find thier true self before they start investing thier time and effort into it.
The way to self improvement is not to always take steps forward. You go three steps forward, two steps back, so on and so forth.
Brandon Carter says
“You don’t rise to your ambitions, you fall to your standards.”
This is a great visual representation of that.
And similarly by James Clear in atomic habits “You don’t rise to the level of your goals.You fall to the level of your systems.”
@@ismandar983I was thinking the same
Just read atomic habits and apply it in your life. Love to yall❤
nice video bro.
One thing I’ve found that really helps me to break this cycle (or at least lessen the lows of it) is to get involved with something external. This can be going to the gym with a friend, joining a martial arts group or whatever. When you have the expectations of other people, you don’t want to let them down, and it also makes many good habits more enjoyable. And if you ever find yourself falling into another rut, your friends or group will often take notice and help you out of it.
When at this stage do you get to start enjoying life and stop hating yourself? It seems like the goal is just to be permanently unhappy with where you are of your own volition
I was about to go to sleep but I get the notification gonna watch it bro's motivation is lifesaver
your sleep is important as well tho lmao. appreciate it anyways
@@tobi44221 it's already 1:27am 💀💀
Not gonna lie, your content is so unreplacable with other content creators man, you got something good going on. ( i like to see you more of your content BUT your life matters more so I do hope you can make some from time to time )
Ive been on self improvement for 2 years, but i never actually started to get stuff done 💀💀 i hope this will help me
lmk how it goes man!
@@tobi44221 Same here man
same bro
Same but I've been on it for FIVE years
Then you actually haven’t been on self improvement
Why so true
The thing about brushing teeth everyday that it is as productive as eating healthy food everyday because it is just your appearance. But the difference here is that you were told to brush your teeth everyday from when you were 2-3 years old. So it is a very well established habit in your brain. Most of the habits we keep doing at our low points are habits we did everyday in childhood and teen years
0:22 probably because most content creators want to profit and not actually help people
god bless you
Just Act, take action and show yourself some love my friend. Stay Uncommon!
W bro this helps
That’s rlly good self improvement content that we have over there
I'm always asking: WHY DO YOU NEED ANYONE TO TELL YOU TO DO SOMETHING?! Its only you that can help YOURSELF!
Self improvement is masturbation.
The second method seems like a surefire way to get a burnout lol. Interesting as a theory but when nothing's ever enough and you always dislike yourself until you reach that ideal state which you will never reach, it's never sustainable. Eventually you're gonna hit a breaking point and fell to an all time low
A string that's too slack will be dull and lifeless. A string that's too taught will snap. That's what buddha discovered during his early period of meditation
Exactly what I thought man
From experience the second way of improving causes me to crash and burn. Currently trying out the first method for the first time
i feel like constantly being productive 24/7 can be harmful too
Going to be honest, I was into self improvement for years, up to a point where I got intoxicated by it ; always felt guilty, burnt out, yet not productive. Objectively, I know I'm a better version of myself in many aspects from who I was years ago, but still... I still feel like that 18 years old loser.
How old are you ?
@@rainofilm-xw3yx I'm 30
I will forever know the truth therefore it will never be a trap.
man i always have that good 3 months where its all going very well then i end up makign the shitiest decsions and back to 0 we go for the rest of the year
✨
this is a good fucking video
2:38 Ir "ESTANDARIZANDO" habito por habito.
3:17 Gráfico de esto.
Based video
holy cow are you a chad, on-point no circlejerk actual advise, nice audio and video, even a docunent and a pause for a screenshot
kudos to you, kind sir
I feel like i'm in "Escape from Self improvement hell" hell, because that's like, 8th video on the same topic I've watched
i address this issue to myself every week but i rarely get any answer and i dont get anywhere honestly
the best self improvement channel, not brainwashing people but telling the truth about self improvement, appreciate your videos bro
W pfp 🔥
It's like this civilation cycle:
hard times create strong men,
strong men create easy times,
easy times create weak men,
weak men create hard times,
Sometimes i think, this cycle is a natural thing and we should accept it or maybe voluntarily cause hard times and eliminate easy times. I guess, cavemen never had easy times.
Nice vedoo bro.❤❤🌿🌿
Hey brother i watched your video. i really liked your thumbnail and i know you must have spent precious time on making it. But would you mind if i reuse it and give you credits in description
there is nothing as self improvement, there is acceptance of self.
and there is thin line between there, delusions of grandeur, yes. you all want to be so big and cast shadows upon all.
none of us will be, none in this existence of ours.
time is the greatest of beings that would cast shadow upon us all.
you dont like yourself ? okay then you gotta do something because nobody but you own the temple.
do something with the tools you have, not the tools you dont have.
you have this on your hand right ? okay play around that, try to vision possibilities of shape you can accquire, something unique with the tools you have given.
fuck people, people are assholes, you cant satisfy their own imaginary expectations, just satisfy yourself.
i dont give a fuck how you feel like this or that or what angle you on, just be okay with whatever you are.
girl didnt like me, boy didnt like me for all people gay, lesbian, straight just say "pfft whatever keep moving" you will not die if somebody didnt liked your company with them.
dont get sad over sentimental things as only the bearer would understand not the listener cope as much as you want but this is the bitter truth.
everything is fixable, because human is limitless potential.
thank you, wish you all great lives.
"But still you brush you teeth and shower" Yeah I'm might cooked
Tobi your vidoes are really good and it's really helping me to change... As about 5 stages I think I am in currently at stage 5.. So, I hope I don't go back to stage 4 😅....
Thanks for making so simple and understanding videos on self improvement ❤❤❤
Know that your efforts were not in vain. Ever since the first time I watched one of your videos, I've truly been doing better than ever before. My cycle of self-improvement hell will end with you. I will make it so. To do otherwise would be an insult to the efforts you've made to get me this far.
All g man, you do it for yourself and your closest people!
Bro, the second method would never make you satisfy by your current situation, and you'll always be in a stress state.
you always find a way to show a different view on all topics you talk about!, thanks bro!
thanks bro i'm trying, also how have you been? haven't talked to you in a while
@@tobi44221 tbh not that good im trynna pull back up tho
Self improvement is a trap or well the version of self improvement that’s fed to us. Truth is the industry behind it basically makes up non existent fluff based on insecurities then sells you a doctrine that’s basically slapping a band aid on a gaping wound.
You’ll hear things like “masculine traits” “alpha/sigma male” “attract women” “success” the stuff that any individual wants.
If you’re a dude you do not need to worry about masculinity, you do not have to worry about confidence or being attractive or being an alpha. It’s about as factual as star signs.
Best thing you can do is ignore it and start thinking for yourself. You pretty much have all the answers and it’s not hard to make beneficial decisions in your life without having to pay frauds to tell you the answers.
Lastly don’t be afraid to follow your interests. Those interests lead to skills and eventually the more proficient you become the more you start to realise that seemingly completely different skill sets will bleed into each other.
Those two things are all you need “masculine” traits automatically develop as a cause to skill building, you will become competent/confident as a result. You will become an alpha/sigma or a better way to put it you will become an authority in your particular fields of interests. Success comes with time making good decisions.
Lastly on the topic of being attractive, there‘s no blanket science to attract everyone. You can have money, a fast car and “game” but really you’re just cheating it. As a result you’ll attract the sorts of people that value shallow things. Body counts are dumb and unfulfilling, after a while everyone wants a decent GF. The best ones that will make large impacts on your life are the ones that are on your wavelength, you’ll know because they’ll like you for you and it feels effortless, they won’t be perfect and neither are you no matter how many “mentors” you pay for.
In essence everything will come together automatically as you grow up. Hope this helps anyone confused and wasting their money and time.
I think thats the best advice for long term success i`ve ever had.. thanks for that bre!🙏
Holy shit. This is actually better then any Hamza or other self improvement video I've seen in months. Thank you for this golden video. Keep it up!
Hope that I will improve for real now, and destroy this demonic cicle .
stop hoping. it's all in your hands. you start to improve when you realize you have all the power
I've been consistent for 3 months now, even tho there are days that weren't too productive they're still much better than the older days where I did absolutely nothing.
The way i've stayed consistent is by doing daily task that have to be completed in a certain time frame or else i have to punish myself to be in check, 4 months into self improvement (Basically like solo leveling with how sung jin woo is reminded to do his daily quest, it works for me also so give this a shot).
I've started slipping back to my bad habits again; this video came at just the right time 💯🙏
The self improvement idea is improving upon itself. Quite beautiful
Indeed, you must have a strong stimul to do this second way, but will the results be even worse when you start falling to the lowest point? The fall may be colossal!
bro that animal crossing music hit hard. all my childhood besties would gather in each others town late at night talking about middle school life and messing around and hitting each other with nets
fr! the good old times
This channel is the very definition of BASED.
You don't need a guru. Just strive to be 1% better every day.
Maybe that's what he said in this video?
We can't be "1% better" everyday tbh
@@Ryuko15 Find and make 1% improvements
trader well more relate to this graph
You trade Futures?
4:16 Cuando mejoramos más? -> DOLOR
Nobody talks about this stuff 😢😢 you are the one who made a really important video ❤❤
Progress comes from within. Only you can make the changes. What people dont tell you is that while you are determined in terms of your behaviour currently, free will can be cultivated as a result of a culmination of thought patterns and behaviours. This should terrify you. When it terrifies you is when you will make a choice: to receed into safety or to thrive on punishment. Only one has a future.
blud watched sam ovens. massive W
i think i found the missing piece
Accurate
So the entire purpose of this video is a bunch of people coping for the fact they can’t be consistent?
If you ACTUALLY LISTENED to videos especially from Hamza you’d realize how smart his approach is when it comes to consistency.
People in the comments claim that self improvement made them feel like they can’t fk up and due to that they feel stress ,
But if you only have watched how Hamza is constantly bashing no fap movement for being that way and how realistic his approach is for when you start new habits .
What I’m saying is, stop hating on self improvement just because it’s harder than you thought and because you ain’t doing it correctly.
I was slowly falling into my low points too often until my pc died 2 months ago, that was unironically the best thing that happened to me in years.
Keep moving forward bro! I believe in you!!!😊
Charge ur pc
This was a very well edited video and great information provided
Be yourself, I relapsed last night without feeling guilt instead I started questioning things like: "Whom am I trying to impress?" and "Did I please anyone for doing or not doing a certain thing?"
Good thought, cold showers, early sleep and exercise aren't gonna make you feel better themselves, you figure out what you want and focus on getting that, you're not impressing anyone but yourself, so work on stuff you want
If you are relapsing, here is the key to stopping: Understand that your mind wants to to do it because it thinks it’s the same as the real thing. You don’t actually want to do it, you (the real you) has no desires whatsoever. Every time you believe that you want to/must do it, your mind has tricked it. I recommend reading a book called “A new earth” by Eckhart Tolle. Hope this helps you
Your comment ruined my whole fucking day
Thanks bro very much for the advice❤
I will try to apply these things into the next up and down cycle
Also what this taught me that some bad habits aren’t that bad
Ex. Instead of playing video games every day I will only play them in Friday as a reward and it will help me feel more motivated, because many people are cutting down on all things up to the point that they realize that they miss it
For me, cutting down on these types of things one by one, little by little is the right choice, and also the best choice(at least for me)
bro i stopped showering properly and sopped bruhing teeth tfk do i do now
The video is nice
Holy shit it's like you've read my mind.
This also links in with the subconscious mind which I just recently started studying. Everything you said sounds so practical, tysm!!
I've been spiralling for about 3 years now. I just turned 18, i got my important exams soon.
This fr q wakeup call 😭😭
That thing with the teeth hurt right in my meow meow... Im 27 and ive lost half my teeth already... Brush your teeth kids
Really didnt expect much of this, but this video highly overdelivered! I mean that, when I say it, I am really going to incooperate this methode now! Thanks Tobi!
I like how easy this was to understand amazing video bro!
Your last strategy sucks. 24/7 self hatred won’t work for anyone. I agree with making your new habits the bare minimum for each day, but that shouldn’t be because you think you’re not good enough. Permanent self hatred (as opposed to temporary self hatred) has never motivated anyone to achieve great things about themselves.
yea cuz some things don't have to be working with everyone... and u gotta figure out urself
True, i have hated myself on not doing something and it discourages me even further.
I have to somehow bekind towards myself, and make my tasks easy and manageable, slowly carefully adding tasks or increasing difficulty.
Im still learning for what works for me
Actually, think of it this way. All of us are being sold the idea of time, progressive overload, etc.
But Elon and other great entrepreneurs didn't do all that. They were in a constant situation of pain, and that's why they are where they are. They were never complacent. They had a super strong 'why'. They signed a contract with themselves that they won't be satisfied unless their purpose has been achieved. Pain and more pain, this was their constant state of being. They went this harsh and fast route.
Ask them if they're satisfied and proud. Answer is guaranteed to be 'no'.
But we peasants, we're doing this the other way around. We don't have a strong why. Our 'why' stops at money, sex, and mere material possessions. We need to find a deeper 'why' for ourselves, and I believe that's where philosophy comes in. To get a man to find his very own personal North Star.
North Star should be such that when you expand your hand out to reach it, you realise that you're nothing. The North Star is so large, massive, and you need to travel all that distance to finally touch it.
The North Star just gets you up, makes you feel that you're getting closer, you visualize and get so desperate to reach it that you get your ass out and start working. Every single day. 0 willpower required.
But diving into philosophy, studying it, picking out your own deeply personal 'why' requires time. Perhaps a lot of it.
yea i used to always have self hatred basically my entire life and it just lead to nothing but constant complaining about myself and not doing anything about it except pushing it off for later
I have nothing to say, except "we need you", wanted to start again watching Hamza's videos, but couldn't make myself watch even 25 minute video. And there it is, 6 minutes of pure knowledge, thank you
ay love to hear that it helps! gl on your journey
I stopped listening to Hamza's videos a year ago because I noticed that there is a lot of repetition.
I recommend the HealthyGamerGG channel, he is a psychiatrist who explains various problems that we experience every day. It was with him that I really started to see real results and take action.
But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.
Hamza is a dopamine inducing slop, the ideas are good. but its packaged in this incel baiting narrative, which is actually demotivating in the long run.
@@Danila_02Yes, Dr. K wants us to embrace who we are and build a resilient mindset that stands amongst all curbs of life. With Hamza it feels like he just wants us to become his specific kind of what an admirable man is. This can work for some but it increases a lot of pressure that makes you feel behind if you don't have an online presence that allows you to have lots of passive income, not the cut physique he has, the success he portrays you should easily have, don't stop having "unproductive hobbies", etc.
Great video. I was hitting a low point over the past couple of days, and I actually found out through you're video that I was subconsiously using this strategy already! Thank you for the worksheet, Im gonna need it.
The biggest problem is you are obsessing and focusing way too much on it. Just live. Just live
Wroooooong
@@mustafayldz9540 wroooong
3:24 This is the best analogy I could find about self improvement. Make your low less low each time
Honestly a really great video. I related to a lot of stuff you said but, most people will still not realize just how hard the second method really is. You really need a live-or-die type of "WHY" to pull that off.
yup, agreed
I am fcking enlighted
I definitely won't be applying this to self-improvement, but I will be yoinking your graph for general skill acquisition purposes.
Great video!
im amazed by how well put this vid was. Real high quality stuff here
Muchas gracias friend, it helped me a lot
There's one big downside of the "fast" method: there's a big possibility that you fail to raise your ceilling at all. That means that your fall will be longer and you will have to climb everything up angain. Everyone who's starting should follow the "slow" method until they're consistent enough with it.
This video is very relatable. Thanks! :D
I remember recieving your email about this and it opened my eyes about this and I'm glad I found this video because of the second part of this video and now that opened my eyes even more