Im 29, father of 3 young babies. Energy levels just plummet, drive doesn't seem to be so high. We just put it on the back burner and help out our woman but I'm trying to prioritize sleep more and taking vitamins. Makes me feel old as hell but we gotta do what we gotta do. Huge respect to all new and Old mothers and fathers out there. Dad's, don't get in your head. We got this 💪🏼
Thank you all for covering this story! My nephew took his own life in September of last year, he was 23 and has 2 little babies. My family is heartbroken forever and we have been trying to raise awareness about postpartum depression in men but no one will listen to us, we feel so discouraged the fact that no one wants to cover our story. Please we would like as a family to tell Lamonte’s story to help other men who silently suffer after having kids. May someone reach out to me please? Thank you!
@ServantLeila23 send it to the ceo and vp of all your local news channel and other cities too. Give a talk at your local hospital program, give talk at library, give talk at Lemans class I'm very sorry.
As a father of triplets I am going through this situation right now. They are 1 year old. I am a stay at home father and my wife is the breadwinner. I look after them. Thanks CBS news for bringing up this article ❤. God bless
Wish you well brother. My wife is pregnant. She's due in October. I'm excited & nervous. I couldn't imagine doing what you're doing. I'm sure you're a great father. Keep your head up brother..
Maybe if people got paid maternity and paternity leave, this wouldn't be as big of a problem. Here is one of the most stressful times in your life, let's cut your financial stability.
Unfortunately a lot of people would abuse this. There has to be a qualification and limits within. Just speaking for myself but I know several women who have had more than one children for financial gain (tax returns, food stamps, subsidized housing, etc) can you imagine raising a child you have not out of love but to use as a paycheck ?
As a mom with a 2.5 month old, I sympathize with dads. There are forums for moms to say, "Im in a dark alley with this new baby," but there needs to also be a group for men to say the same things. Hugs to dads. Hang in there.
This is 100% accurate. My ex-husband went into a major depression three months after our son was born, which was also the summer of Covid. He then filed for divorce when our son was 6 months old. I couldn't ever make sense of it all, but this explains a lot.
This is very true. When I had my son, the first 9-mo, I had suicidal ideation almost daily. I had never experience depression before. We also had a complicated pregnancy that required emergency operation on my wife; she was an absolute rockstar, but seeing her in pain and all of it resulted me having panic attacks for the first time in my life. We don't talk about how hard parenting - even when everything is going according to plan! - enough. We, men, need to open up more to each other about these kinds of issues, I'm glad he mentioned that our testosterone goes down which is probably the single most important hormonal function of our bodies, because after my son was born, mines plummeted. There's several studies on this and it makes sense why, but it also supports the idea that men can get PPD.
My husband has been extra irritable for at least the last 4 months. My baby is almost 8 months. My husband's testosterone 6 months postpartum was ~120, very low. How do I help him?
@nm6857 I'm sorry about that situation, that is really rough. Working out does help with hormonal regulation, as well as a healthy diet. It would be a long list so I would Google it and see what recipes sound good to cook together, but it's amazing how healing the right food can be. I also recommend the 2-2-2 rule with dates (at least two small things to do together a week, a nice big date every 2 months, and a vacation of some sort every 2 years. Doesn't have to be expensive either, it's more about making memories and having time together). Some of my friends felt like roommates at one point after having kids because they stopped going out and doing things together for quite awhile, and were the ones that recommended that. None of us will live forever, and in the end it's the time that we put into what we love that will stay with us. As much as you love your kid and are putting in effort into being an amazing parent, it's also good to put time and show love towards yourself and each other. I am just another stranger on the internet and honestly I don't know the full situation, but I hope what I said helps in some way and genuinely wish the best for you and your family.
@@nm6857 Try to get a babysitter and have a date night if you haven’t in a while. He can talk to his doctor about testosterone therapy. Does he exercise? Do you have spiritual or mental health support? Getting support from a licensed therapist or from your spiritual community while dealing with life challenges can be helpful. Hug each other take a deep breath. That’s a natural way to release oxytocin. Let your man know he is still important to you. Sometimes men feel like the baby becomes number one and they still need quality time with their wife.
They need to account for new fathers who are overwhelmed or just don’t want to be bothered. A man staying at home to take care of children full time will either love it or hate it. When free time to hang out with buddies or play video games is gone, some men will feel very depressed. Their time isn’t solely for them anymore. Also, the lack of an extended family, or community, will wear on both parents. This is especially true for women. We weren’t really meant to hide and raise our families isolated in a little corner.
I broke down in the hospital because I spent years wanting to become a father, and the second I got it, I had no idea what to do. Luckily I prayed desperately to be given strength, patience and wisdom to be able to handle it, and God absolutely helped to put me at ease.
The doctor got it exactly right at the end of the video. Human males experience a decrease in testosterone levels after having a child. This is an evolutionary adaptation to help ensure the survival of the baby. Higher testosterone levels typically mean more aggression, anger, and sometimes risky behaviors. These characteristics are not beneficial to raising a fragile newborn baby. A drop in testosterone levels helps to ensure that males are less aggressive and better suited to providing a safer environment for a child to grow. This, in turn, helps to ensure the survival of our species.
This is a true statement, I’m on my 2nd kid (a newborn ) and I went from a career job to minimum wage, during my wife’s pregnancy and I was stressing out about how I am going to provide in this economy and now the baby is going to be born so I have to work two jobs at minimum wage to provide just to provide for a family of four until I can get a decent salary to afford living expenses
We're forced to balance going on no sleep and yet can't miss much work. Not surprising. The first year in general is hard for both because of sleep and adjusting while we still have to continue work like nothing happened
It is not really the responsibility of other people regardless if they're related to you or not. That's what I don't like about people: they impose everything about how it is great to have children, but once they're here and ask for their help, they'll say that you're on your own and it was your decision. 🤡🌎
Fathers are constantly neglected because they’re often told in not so unspoken terms they’re the least important person in the family unit. It’s also a tough time when the babies need their mothers so much early in life and the fathers feel helpless and an immense weight to care for them
Least important except when it comes to money, work, protection, maintenance etc. going through this now. To me, i feel we become a tool that’s used until it breaks then it’s just thrown away. Oh well. Such is life.
The American society as well as those in other nations, is very stressful. In many less developed countries, such as some South Pacific islands, people are more relaxed. When babies are born they are welcomed by the whole clan as well as the parents, grandparents and other family members. God loves every human being; let's put our trust in God. God is Love.
These unspoken truths. The struggle is absolutely real. Being a new dad is the definition of suffering in silence. Not to mention having to deal with the logistics and financial costs in a society that is largely unsupportive.
Man i slipped into some darkness when my son was about 4 months and I did drink a lot. Jesus. I mean i guess I feel a little better about it after watching this.
Doing those surveys for the fathers is such a good idea!! Expecting our second and I want to make sure my husband is taken care of too. He carries so much on his shoulders for our family.
After my firstborn I felt my brain chemistry shift and I was more aware of my emotions; I was also more attracted to buying a motorcycle, rock climbing, and extreme mountaineering.
I can relate because when I had my first daughter I was so worried about her I didn't sleep for a whole week. Nothing was wrong with her I was just overly worried.
She was probably thinking of surrogates (who are technically the birth mother, but necessarily the genetic or social mother). A trend, which unfortunately, is becoming more and more common these days. So this type of language to accommodate that reality is also going to become more common.
Yup it happened to me and I tried to tell people and they were like “why are you making this about you? It’s all about the women?” And I was like “duh but Canada has been all over this research long before the US….so it’s about both of us?”
im 34 with 3 kids , all girls . i feel more happy , mature , man-ly , and responsible . this doesnt apply to everyone . ive always loved kids and the idea of having them .
Same father of 2 girls. I love my babies and have changed for the better. I grew up with a large family and have a great support system around me. I can definitely see this happening to men that don’t have that, or are struggling financially.
Thank you for this post!!! What a joy being a father can be. My husband is a girl dad, 4 girls and 1 baby in heaven, and he is the best dad... They bring us so much joy. Everything in life has its struggles, but the overwhelming joy, he shines it...
Suck it up men we are called to be strong to lead our wives and children. We don’t have time to fall victim to this depression! Get outside and workout, eat healthy, read, call a friend, go to church. This World Needs Strong Men!
The comment I was looking for. America is better off blaming the parents though. I live in a state where parental leave is completely up to the employer...a complete joke
My daughter’s father was so exhausted, he wrote his name and our babies name incorrectly on the birth certificate. It took a very long time to get it corrected. It’s still not correct. The office just fixed our babies name. 😌
I was fired many times until I had a baby. I’m a millionaire now. I was determined I would never let down my baby girl and my wife. That baby changed everything. If black fathers were the same then crime and poverty in the black community would disappear
It’s all about the fact we have to pay for it all I got three jobs when I found out my wife was pregnant It’s just different I wouldn’t even share all the financial stress with the wife so she could be good and comfortable.
Unfortunately, with the economy as bad as it is, my wife and I both work fulltime to survive and can barely pay the bills still after medical insurance and hospital bills especially. Taking care of a kid with that level of work and burden isnt easy, espcially with the additional mental toll. This country doesnt care about kids at all and especially not mental health. And society doesnt care much for men's mental health specifically.
Theyre sad that other women will never look at them the same way.. They also feel way older and its hard for them to accept their young single life is done.
Just don't get on a bunch meds like these moms, become pilled out and lose yourself. Get sun, go outside, go for a walk or run, eat whole foods, take supplements and drink coffee😏 Also smoke joints not meth ☺️
There’s just no satisfaction with men. They want to be married but wish they didn’t…, they want to be husbands but very much misses the bachelor life…, they want to have children and be dads but don’t ever want to deal with the responsibility as parents…, they want to be the sole provider to his family but doesn’t like the fact his wife who’s the mother to his children is not earning a living as he does. No satisfaction whatsoever…at all.
Dang i agree, but thats because i sitting there watching a kid poop, eat, and sleep all day. For me as a man this was the boring faze. I had all the responsibilities of a human but no iteraction cuz all they want to do is sleep, poop and sleep. Boring.
Yeah I don't know how comparable it is to women's postpartum depression but I think if anyone is experiencing depression, it should be taken seriously.
Why does the female host keep bringing up the mother’s issues EVERY time she talks?! That defeats the purpose at the subject at hand… “New Dads & Postpartum Depression”
Historically when women had depressive states after childbirth they were dismissed from getting further help. Discussion about postpartum depression among women is still relatively new and is still unknown to many individuals and families and is discouraged, as a relationship and child is expected to be a woman’s life’s fulfillment and source of happiness. The problem is dismissed but still remains. Postpartum Depression is also associated with the dramatic hormonal changes within a woman’s body after childbirth. Mental health is ever-expanding with new discoveries so using existing rationale should not be interpreted as purposeful malice.
I love that the reporter shared his story about his father in the hospital room. It made the reporter appear human and relatable
This was funny to me 😂❤
Why do you want to relate to a news reporter?
Im 29, father of 3 young babies. Energy levels just plummet, drive doesn't seem to be so high. We just put it on the back burner and help out our woman but I'm trying to prioritize sleep more and taking vitamins. Makes me feel old as hell but we gotta do what we gotta do. Huge respect to all new and Old mothers and fathers out there. Dad's, don't get in your head. We got this 💪🏼
Thank you all for covering this story! My nephew took his own life in September of last year, he was 23 and has 2 little babies. My family is heartbroken forever and we have been trying to raise awareness about postpartum depression in men but no one will listen to us, we feel so discouraged the fact that no one wants to cover our story.
Please we would like as a family to tell Lamonte’s story to help other men who silently suffer after having kids.
May someone reach out to me please?
Thank you!
Write a certified letter to CEO and vice president and follow up
Call station phone
Post story on various health websites
@ I have done all those things except write a letter…
Now who am I writing it to I live in Ohio?
@ thanks for the info
@ServantLeila23 send it to the ceo and vp of all your local news channel and other cities too.
Give a talk at your local hospital program, give talk at library, give talk at Lemans class
I'm very sorry.
@ServantLeila23 you can always ask me
As a father of triplets I am going through this situation right now. They are 1 year old. I am a stay at home father and my wife is the breadwinner. I look after them. Thanks CBS news for bringing up this article ❤. God bless
Man! Triplets! Lots of prayers for you! We have twins, and two is exhausting. But three?! You are a rockstar!!
That's a ton of hard work. Be kind and patient with yourself, too. I tip my hat to you. You got this.
Do you get help. This is overwhelming and possibly dangerous. Do you even sleep?
Hang in there king! It's a beautiful time and a difficult one. It does get easier with time as they get older.
Wish you well brother. My wife is pregnant. She's due in October. I'm excited & nervous. I couldn't imagine doing what you're doing. I'm sure you're a great father. Keep your head up brother..
Maybe if people got paid maternity and paternity leave, this wouldn't be as big of a problem. Here is one of the most stressful times in your life, let's cut your financial stability.
Unfortunately a lot of people would abuse this. There has to be a qualification and limits within. Just speaking for myself but I know several women who have had more than one children for financial gain (tax returns, food stamps, subsidized housing, etc) can you imagine raising a child you have not out of love but to use as a paycheck ?
As a mom with a 2.5 month old, I sympathize with dads. There are forums for moms to say, "Im in a dark alley with this new baby," but there needs to also be a group for men to say the same things. Hugs to dads. Hang in there.
This is 100% accurate. My ex-husband went into a major depression three months after our son was born, which was also the summer of Covid. He then filed for divorce when our son was 6 months old. I couldn't ever make sense of it all, but this explains a lot.
Pray for all new families!
I have two little ones and love them so much but we definitely both experienced this!!
🙏🏾
@@762Queen 🙏🏽
Having children is a big thing- people talk and not realizing that when the baby is here the mind and emotions go off the charts
This is very true. When I had my son, the first 9-mo, I had suicidal ideation almost daily. I had never experience depression before. We also had a complicated pregnancy that required emergency operation on my wife; she was an absolute rockstar, but seeing her in pain and all of it resulted me having panic attacks for the first time in my life.
We don't talk about how hard parenting - even when everything is going according to plan! - enough. We, men, need to open up more to each other about these kinds of issues,
I'm glad he mentioned that our testosterone goes down which is probably the single most important hormonal function of our bodies, because after my son was born, mines plummeted. There's several studies on this and it makes sense why, but it also supports the idea that men can get PPD.
My husband has been extra irritable for at least the last 4 months. My baby is almost 8 months. My husband's testosterone 6 months postpartum was ~120, very low. How do I help him?
@nm6857 I'm sorry about that situation, that is really rough. Working out does help with hormonal regulation, as well as a healthy diet. It would be a long list so I would Google it and see what recipes sound good to cook together, but it's amazing how healing the right food can be. I also recommend the 2-2-2 rule with dates (at least two small things to do together a week, a nice big date every 2 months, and a vacation of some sort every 2 years. Doesn't have to be expensive either, it's more about making memories and having time together). Some of my friends felt like roommates at one point after having kids because they stopped going out and doing things together for quite awhile, and were the ones that recommended that. None of us will live forever, and in the end it's the time that we put into what we love that will stay with us. As much as you love your kid and are putting in effort into being an amazing parent, it's also good to put time and show love towards yourself and each other. I am just another stranger on the internet and honestly I don't know the full situation, but I hope what I said helps in some way and genuinely wish the best for you and your family.
@@nm6857 Try to get a babysitter and have a date night if you haven’t in a while. He can talk to his doctor about testosterone therapy. Does he exercise? Do you have spiritual or mental health support? Getting support from a licensed therapist or from your spiritual community while dealing with life challenges can be helpful. Hug each other take a deep breath. That’s a natural way to release oxytocin. Let your man know he is still important to you. Sometimes men feel like the baby becomes number one and they still need quality time with their wife.
@nm6857 I would look into TRT could help boost his mood significantly
They need to account for new fathers who are overwhelmed or just don’t want to be bothered. A man staying at home to take care of children full time will either love it or hate it. When free time to hang out with buddies or play video games is gone, some men will feel very depressed. Their time isn’t solely for them anymore. Also, the lack of an extended family, or community, will wear on both parents. This is especially true for women. We weren’t really meant to hide and raise our families isolated in a little corner.
I broke down in the hospital because I spent years wanting to become a father, and the second I got it, I had no idea what to do. Luckily I prayed desperately to be given strength, patience and wisdom to be able to handle it, and God absolutely helped to put me at ease.
The doctor got it exactly right at the end of the video. Human males experience a decrease in testosterone levels after having a child. This is an evolutionary adaptation to help ensure the survival of the baby. Higher testosterone levels typically mean more aggression, anger, and sometimes risky behaviors. These characteristics are not beneficial to raising a fragile newborn baby. A drop in testosterone levels helps to ensure that males are less aggressive and better suited to providing a safer environment for a child to grow. This, in turn, helps to ensure the survival of our species.
Beautiful!
Makes total sense and it seems like an important adaptation
Paternal health is not something that is widely talked about so I’m very happy that this doctor is trying to normalize this discussion
This is a true statement, I’m on my 2nd kid (a newborn ) and I went from a career job to minimum wage, during my wife’s pregnancy and I was stressing out about how I am going to provide in this economy and now the baby is going to be born so I have to work two jobs at minimum wage to provide just to provide for a family of four until I can get a decent salary to afford living expenses
We're forced to balance going on no sleep and yet can't miss much work. Not surprising. The first year in general is hard for both because of sleep and adjusting while we still have to continue work like nothing happened
I think raising children wo support from grandparents and community aunties etc means more stress for new parents!
It is not really the responsibility of other people regardless if they're related to you or not. That's what I don't like about people: they impose everything about how it is great to have children, but once they're here and ask for their help, they'll say that you're on your own and it was your decision. 🤡🌎
This is a good topic! We do not get enough paid maternity and paternity leave here in the US.
Becoming a parent, itself can be difficult. But, I believe all these problems are there before and becoming a parent just makes it overwhelming.
Exactly...
Fathers are constantly neglected because they’re often told in not so unspoken terms they’re the least important person in the family unit. It’s also a tough time when the babies need their mothers so much early in life and the fathers feel helpless and an immense weight to care for them
Least important except when it comes to money, work, protection, maintenance etc. going through this now. To me, i feel we become a tool that’s used until it breaks then it’s just thrown away. Oh well. Such is life.
Yea the guy anchor is cool. He’s a pro and relatable. Keep em around
The American society as well as those in other nations, is very stressful. In many less developed countries, such as some South Pacific islands, people are more relaxed. When babies are born they are welcomed by the whole clan as well as the parents, grandparents and other family members. God loves every human being; let's put our trust in God. God is Love.
These unspoken truths. The struggle is absolutely real. Being a new dad is the definition of suffering in silence. Not to mention having to deal with the logistics and financial costs in a society that is largely unsupportive.
Man i slipped into some darkness when my son was about 4 months and I did drink a lot.
Jesus.
I mean i guess I feel a little better about it after watching this.
I had a psychosis 2 weeks after my son was born its real with men
Doing those surveys for the fathers is such a good idea!! Expecting our second and I want to make sure my husband is taken care of too. He carries so much on his shoulders for our family.
Thank you for this video 🎉
As a twin dad, this reality is extremely clear to me. 😢
I Believe That...
After my firstborn I felt my brain chemistry shift and I was more aware of my emotions; I was also more attracted to buying a motorcycle, rock climbing, and extreme mountaineering.
I can relate because when I had my first daughter I was so worried about her I didn't sleep for a whole week. Nothing was wrong with her I was just overly worried.
Man up buttercups! Pray, provide, protect.
Couldn’t agree more
"the mother or the person that had the child..." umm who else can "have" the child? I assume she's meaning give birth
She just had to get the woke points in. 😒
She was probably thinking of surrogates (who are technically the birth mother, but necessarily the genetic or social mother). A trend, which unfortunately, is becoming more and more common these days. So this type of language to accommodate that reality is also going to become more common.
Pretty sure that's for ALL parents in their right minds
Yup it happened to me and I tried to tell people and they were like “why are you making this about you? It’s all about the women?” And I was like “duh but Canada has been all over this research long before the US….so it’s about both of us?”
im 34 with 3 kids , all girls . i feel more happy , mature , man-ly , and responsible . this doesnt apply to everyone . ive always loved kids and the idea of having them .
Same father of 2 girls. I love my babies and have changed for the better. I grew up with a large family and have a great support system around me. I can definitely see this happening to men that don’t have that, or are struggling financially.
@marcoz2470 agreed. god bless you and your family !
Thank you for this post!!! What a joy being a father can be. My husband is a girl dad, 4 girls and 1 baby in heaven, and he is the best dad... They bring us so much joy. Everything in life has its struggles, but the overwhelming joy, he shines it...
Suck it up men we are called to be strong to lead our wives and children. We don’t have time to fall victim to this depression! Get outside and workout, eat healthy, read, call a friend, go to church. This World Needs Strong Men!
Yes!!⬆️⬆️
How does this compare with countries with better parental leave policies?
The comment I was looking for. America is better off blaming the parents though. I live in a state where parental leave is completely up to the employer...a complete joke
Wow, what doctor allows anyone to smoke in a delivery room? Holy crap, that was interesting!
News guy just got a chance to talk about his Trauma from his dad.
My daughter’s father was so exhausted, he wrote his name and our babies name incorrectly on the birth certificate.
It took a very long time to get it corrected. It’s still not correct. The office just fixed our babies name. 😌
Will they finally start believing those women who say this? Or just blame her for not being “motherly”. wtf that means.
This article is not about women, ma’am. Thanks!
I was fired many times until I had a baby. I’m a millionaire now. I was determined I would never let down my baby girl and my wife. That baby changed everything. If black fathers were the same then crime and poverty in the black community would disappear
It’s all about the fact we have to pay for it all
I got three jobs when I found out my wife was pregnant
It’s just different
I wouldn’t even share all the financial stress with the wife so she could be good and comfortable.
did he just say "NOW they're encouraging" skin-to-skin contact? what is wrong with people? (lots of degrees floating around but no common sense)
Unfortunately, with the economy as bad as it is, my wife and I both work fulltime to survive and can barely pay the bills still after medical insurance and hospital bills especially. Taking care of a kid with that level of work and burden isnt easy, espcially with the additional mental toll. This country doesnt care about kids at all and especially not mental health. And society doesnt care much for men's mental health specifically.
Seriously these fathers need to keep themselves busy with other things and go outdoor more, no more depression guaranteed!
Now that men have it maybe they will believe women who have it.
Theyre sad that other women will never look at them the same way.. They also feel way older and its hard for them to accept their young single life is done.
Pretty blanket and generalized statement. How do you know how other women will look at a man who is a father?
It’s because they are big babies themselves and no longer get all the attention 🙄
Just don't get on a bunch meds like these moms, become pilled out and lose yourself.
Get sun, go outside, go for a walk or run, eat whole foods, take supplements and drink coffee😏
Also smoke joints not meth ☺️
There’s just no satisfaction with men. They want to be married but wish they didn’t…, they want to be husbands but very much misses the bachelor life…, they want to have children and be dads but don’t ever want to deal with the responsibility as parents…, they want to be the sole provider to his family but doesn’t like the fact his wife who’s the mother to his children is not earning a living as he does. No satisfaction whatsoever…at all.
Dang i agree, but thats because i sitting there watching a kid poop, eat, and sleep all day. For me as a man this was the boring faze. I had all the responsibilities of a human but no iteraction cuz all they want to do is sleep, poop and sleep. Boring.
Oh please. Let’s not compare this to women’s postpartum depression.
Yeah I don't know how comparable it is to women's postpartum depression but I think if anyone is experiencing depression, it should be taken seriously.
Wtf is this push to consider mens "pregnancy symptoms"?? In the news lately. Theyre not the ones being pregnant. Everyday im glad to be childfree.
Thank you
Absurd. Im glad im childfree.
When you get a divorce, you might feel a bit small.
I had no idea men were people
Why does the female host keep bringing up the mother’s issues EVERY time she talks?! That defeats the purpose at the subject at hand… “New Dads & Postpartum Depression”
Historically when women had depressive states after childbirth they were dismissed from getting further help.
Discussion about postpartum depression among women is still relatively new and is still unknown to many individuals and families and is discouraged, as a relationship and child is expected to be a woman’s life’s fulfillment and source of happiness. The problem is dismissed but still remains.
Postpartum Depression is also associated with the dramatic hormonal changes within a woman’s body after childbirth.
Mental health is ever-expanding with new discoveries so using existing rationale should not be interpreted as purposeful malice.
Man up.
This is silly
Don’t like seeing this news anchor anymore- bye!