6 High Value Women Boundaries

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  • Опубликовано: 30 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 238

  • @haniyehnabi7011
    @haniyehnabi7011 2 года назад +55

    Lovely thank you.I like your videos.😚

  • @Lazy-bliss
    @Lazy-bliss 2 года назад +314

    -learn to say no
    - intimacy is not currency
    - any form of abuse is totally unacceptable
    - your time is precious
    - your right to secret garden

    • @beijaflor5513
      @beijaflor5513 2 года назад +10

      A good relationship means these "boundaries" work both ways. Practice what you preach should be a realistic expectation in a true relationship.

    • @bilalkhares9337
      @bilalkhares9337 2 года назад

      1, 4 and 5 will keep you single

    • @erinwhite8456
      @erinwhite8456 2 года назад +14

      @@bilalkhares9337 LOL. I’ll stay happily single then, thank you very much.

    • @DiamondsRexpensive
      @DiamondsRexpensive 2 года назад

      @@bilalkhares9337 I assume you're Muslim and expect to have a sugar mommy, take all her money, and then form a harem of women who are with you for the money and power. Lmfao.

  • @miss.moon.alyssa
    @miss.moon.alyssa 2 года назад +54

    How much money is in MY bank account is one thing I will never tell a man.

  • @reshmisharikh6663
    @reshmisharikh6663 2 года назад +201

    I'm single but I love to educate myself in different topic different things thank you so much for your hard work I really appreciate you

    • @Theblackswan55
      @Theblackswan55  2 года назад +12

      I am glad my content is helping you

    • @chaymaedaoudi5330
      @chaymaedaoudi5330 2 года назад +1

      You are doing great.you are doing the right thing. Getting yourself prepared and informed saves your energy and mental health.i wish I did it earlier cauz i wasn't very involved when I was single and now after a hard relationship I am learning everything.

    • @Xavierwrldwide
      @Xavierwrldwide 2 года назад

      a high value woman doesent exist, a woman defines her value by the man she is with

    • @feediefarouq159
      @feediefarouq159 2 года назад +2

      Am single and preparing myself as well 😸

    • @lisacranmer8005
      @lisacranmer8005 2 года назад

      @@Theblackswan55 Yes, no is now my favorite word, was people pleaser for so long that people walked over and over me, then people talking about me behind my back when they are the liers, who KEPT secrets and playing games...I say No, take me home, Money is nothing but paper... anyone who thinks that I'm giving up anything for a favor..dead wrong..put up with liers, womanizer, takers for use me..been there for so many and I get talked about from people who have abused me.. secrets and lies are just Wicked, if I was with a lier who played the field prior but wants to ask me and attack me, that's just wrong..

  • @Miss_Sippy
    @Miss_Sippy 2 года назад +11

    Absolutely, and if a man does not appreciate your stance? He is not for you.

  • @evab2132
    @evab2132 2 года назад +190

    If you tell others people secret it's betrayal. If you tell yours it's stupidity.

    • @Theblackswan55
      @Theblackswan55  2 года назад +16

      Very well said ❤️

    • @evab2132
      @evab2132 2 года назад +9

      @@Theblackswan55 My own life experiences. 🤣

    • @nehemilia5033
      @nehemilia5033 2 года назад +4

      Never ever saw it like that. But thanks for the mind renewal though

  • @sagenosnibor9173
    @sagenosnibor9173 2 года назад +19

    So proud to say that I've finally transformed into this woman 🦸🏾‍♀️💪🏾

  • @twe5507
    @twe5507 2 года назад +32

    Great video! I would add 1 small remark to that. You said as an example "I am sorry but I am not comfortable doing that", and "I am sorry, but I am not going to share this or that information yet". However, we don't have to say sorry for something that we stand for. We don't have to apologize when we are not doing anybody wrong. We can just say "No, I don't feel comfortable doing that" and "No, I am not sharing this or that information yet."

    • @Theblackswan55
      @Theblackswan55  2 года назад +8

      Thanks for your comment and suggestion. As someone else pointed out, 'I am sorry' is more so to sugarcoat my objection to do something I don't want to and not really an apology. I do believe the more subtle, and hot n cold you are, the more powerful your message is but it's just a personl opinion. You can be straight to the point and it will have a very similar effect.

  • @michelebeck4554
    @michelebeck4554 2 года назад +46

    I agree with everything except that there is no reason to say "I am sorry" preceding any of the no's. It is simply "No" without a need to apologize for your no. Be the queen you were born to be and stop apologizing for everything you do. You are perfectly authentically you.

    • @Theblackswan55
      @Theblackswan55  2 года назад +7

      I respect your opinion on that one. It's a bit bolder than I would naturally be but I agree with you in principle that you don't need to say 'I am sorry'

    • @elefoundation3703
      @elefoundation3703 2 года назад +10

      Also saying sorry is not really apologising in that context but more like sugar coating the no. A further way to do It I would love to or I wish I could but no I cant

    • @jamessharp9790
      @jamessharp9790 2 года назад +1

      @@elefoundation3703 or just politely say no.

  • @MademoiselleGisela
    @MademoiselleGisela 2 года назад +24

    I would add to the last one, this:
    Keep your family very personal problems only to yourself, there is no need for a parent to know if you brother had depression or a suicide attempt in the past (to give an example) or that your dad cheated many times to your ma
    I think this information could be used against you as well, so I would keep these very personal family things in private.

    • @Theblackswan55
      @Theblackswan55  2 года назад +6

      Agree 💯 %

    • @chaimomma9198
      @chaimomma9198 2 года назад

      Only because people won’t love like Christ and that is the crux. We play church but no one actually will BE THE Church. It’s all an act. The real church in homeless shelters, drug rehab, single moms all alone and poor families feeling ashamed by society. Even “family”

  • @sarahmclin2434
    @sarahmclin2434 2 года назад +42

    I'm married, but I absolutely love these tips. I think they'd help any woman have a better life and relationships. Thank you for sharing!

    • @prathamsrivastava1367
      @prathamsrivastava1367 2 года назад

      These tips are basic humanity for both men & women. But people listen & learn only when you say to them specifically (like to women) in a specific context (like dating).

    • @prathamsrivastava1367
      @prathamsrivastava1367 2 года назад

      @@joyc9323 you didn't got the point, neither of video, nor my statement. Read & understand again.

  • @joannelewis8038
    @joannelewis8038 2 года назад +5

    I'm valuable because I exist. My life has value

  • @love_dove_
    @love_dove_ 2 года назад +13

    Have high expectations. Never lower your standards. I'm not talking about superficial things, I mean the real things that matter to you and these will be different for everyone.

  • @fecardona
    @fecardona 2 года назад +8

    Thanks for your videos and your channel. Im sharing them with a friend who’s just broken up with a low value man, her self esteem is in the shambles, and is in need of mental help to get back on track.

  • @Miss_Vee993
    @Miss_Vee993 2 года назад +51

    This popped up , just after I stood for myself about my life decision against my dad !
    As a " obidient and peace maker kid " from childhood, This has been my big achievements and Imma keep going !
    And I am in my twenties !! But hey, ItS never tooo late !!!
    As ab empath, Its hurts but I am aware its now or never 😅
    Thank you for this video ❤

    • @janas2734
      @janas2734 Год назад

      I have the same issue with my father, but I'm older than you..

    • @Miss_Vee993
      @Miss_Vee993 Год назад

      @@janas2734 I just hit my 30. So I think you assumed I might be younger 😁 Are you in the similar age range?

    • @janas2734
      @janas2734 Год назад

      @@Miss_Vee993 I'm in my 40s.. Too bad.. and catastrophic experiences with men.. Never mind there's better life out there I believe

    • @Miss_Vee993
      @Miss_Vee993 Год назад

      @@janas2734 Hang in there, my friend. You are still way too young to give up hope. I am rooting for you! May your all dreams, come true. 🥰 Bless you!

    • @janas2734
      @janas2734 Год назад +1

      @@Miss_Vee993 ❤

  • @m.t-thoughts8919
    @m.t-thoughts8919 2 года назад +4

    This channel is a gem even for guys, if you are willing to kill your ego for growth and loves to think outside the box

  • @missfatcat
    @missfatcat 2 года назад +11

    Honestly to piggy back on that last one - if you are not yet ready or he is simply not giving it you - part of the right to your own privacy in a relationship is being able to share certain things with your girlfriends without him.
    I have dated men who are quick to keep you to themselves or try making everything yours their own (ideas, interests etc). So many men have not yet learned how to connect emotionally & are insecure. That’s part of why if they have little or no friends of their own it’s a red flag. This is such a great list, & I love all of your videos! ♥️

  • @wandadrees6384
    @wandadrees6384 2 года назад +82

    Some of your past mistakes, you are entitled to keep private
    Especially if you have grown and moved on from that behavior
    Examples: cheating, lying, getting drunk or using drugs, dressing to provocatively, attention seeking behavior or media posts

    • @Theblackswan55
      @Theblackswan55  2 года назад +46

      Exactly, if you think about it. What is the purpose of sharing these things anyway. And people use them against you when things go wrong.

    • @mushroomzulu
      @mushroomzulu 2 года назад +8

      Starting a relationship off on a lie is not a good idea and not something a high value woman would do. Your past is part of you. Hiding these things also shows that you really haven't gotten past them.

    • @elschlagador9064
      @elschlagador9064 2 года назад +9

      Let's view it simply: men are free to ask and you are free to keep it secret. But lying is not acceptable if telling the truth would have driven the man away:it's inducing someone into a relationship. People have the right to have criteria and to enforce them.

    • @mstwelvedeadlycyns
      @mstwelvedeadlycyns 2 года назад

      ​ Yes true regrets

    • @philipbre
      @philipbre 2 года назад +1

      These all are habits that go away with difficulty.

  • @laramnt8025
    @laramnt8025 2 года назад +4

    U are astonishing to be honest, you are one of the rarest you tubers that deliver the message in a very rich clear and brief way, and im telling you really have skills in giving advices about realtionships 👏 and i hope that you didn’t have many heartbreaks but you are awesome really

  • @iamgoddessoflove
    @iamgoddessoflove 2 года назад +24

    Setting boundaries is so important and healthy, as it sets the tone of our friendships and relationships.
    💙RUclipsr That Helps People Overcome Toxic Relationships

    • @Theblackswan55
      @Theblackswan55  2 года назад +2

      Thank you so much ❤️❤️

    • @hatchettharley3186
      @hatchettharley3186 Год назад

      It also keeps us happier as we don’t feel the resentment that can arise when we feel we are being taken advantage of.

  • @smores8982
    @smores8982 2 года назад +78

    Agreed! Number 4 - your time is precious - is a big one for me. I cut a man off once I started noticing that he was bread crumbing me and setting a date up with me then bailing out on me and going on another date. He did that ONCE and I let it slide, however, he attempted it again and said he was going to meet with “a friend”…on a Saturday evening/night??! I called him out on it. I’m not dumb, I knew what he was doing. Boy bye! Don’t waste my time or toy with me.

    • @prathamsrivastava1367
      @prathamsrivastava1367 2 года назад

      Have you communicated this properly to him, or just assumed negativity & left without understanding him ? Has he not given you the reason why he did what he did ?

    • @smores8982
      @smores8982 2 года назад +5

      @@prathamsrivastava1367 I did. When he asked if we could meet earlier, he didn’t give me a reason (I.e., I have to meet a friend later or whatever) until I flat out ASKED him if he had plans for later, it was THEN that he said yes, he was meeting “a friend who was in town”. I therefore cancelled on him and told him it’s not nice to make plans with someone and bail out on the person to meet with someone else. He then had nerve to speak in hypothetical terms with me by asking “what’s wrong with that? What if you had to meet with your mother before/after meeting with me?” I told him FIRST of all, I’d make it known BEFOREHAND so as to give him a heads up, secondly, I don’t tend to make a habit of making plans with multiple ppl on a given day. He was clearly playing head games with me and clearly, he wasn’t meeting his mother on a Saturday night. On what planet would a single man ditch a single woman to meet with “a friend” on a Saturday evening? That was his SECOND attempt. Fool me once, shame on you….you know the rest.

    • @prathamsrivastava1367
      @prathamsrivastava1367 2 года назад

      @@smores8982 you just assumed negativity

    • @smores8982
      @smores8982 2 года назад +2

      @@prathamsrivastava1367 telling someone you want to meet earlier (rather than the intended time) because you plan to leave earlier is common courtesy so as they can also plan accordingly, which he did not do (until I asked him why he wanted to change the meeting time) He also didn’t extend an invitation to me to come along and meet this so-called “friend” he’s meeting and was just going to cut out without giving me advanced notice. He simply deflected by asking me about a hypothetical situation. Now tell me again, what did I assume? Seems you’re a bit gullible

    • @prathamsrivastava1367
      @prathamsrivastava1367 2 года назад

      @@smores8982 everything you have written you have assumed. Read it yourself as if it is written by some other person eg. John. You will understand yourself.
      Next time, don't assume things, ask proper full questions, communicate properly in full sentences and take time to know what actually happened, else you will lose people like this again, and you are not getting any younger.
      I have been with some girls who assumed negativity and block communication or ran away without telling anything. God bless their mental health. Don't become such. Take it in a positive manner as a constructive criticism, and implement it make better your life. Good luck for relationships.

  • @mariummmm189
    @mariummmm189 11 месяцев назад

    I'm grateful that i found this channel. Thank you so much.

  • @zzh2939
    @zzh2939 Год назад +1

    Thanks so much for sharing these wisdom!🙏🌞❤️👍👍👍

  • @LDolar
    @LDolar Год назад +1

    Amazing I loved this so much ! I’m on the right track!!!

  • @gunfugames7430
    @gunfugames7430 2 года назад +2

    Your advice is like double edged sword. It cuts both ways.

  • @nehemilia5033
    @nehemilia5033 2 года назад +2

    When I hear you talk I see myself alone in your videos. Thank you for validating me. And allowing me to be myself

  • @prathamsrivastava1367
    @prathamsrivastava1367 2 года назад +8

    What you don't tolerate, make sure you don't make other's tolerate it too.
    e.g. You don't tolerate when someone wastes your time, So You also don't waste somebody else's time. Don't make them tolerate you wasting their time.

    • @ih4630
      @ih4630 Год назад

      So true… I was thinking the exact same thing!

  • @alaiaadam5767
    @alaiaadam5767 8 месяцев назад +1

    🍻🏆🍻🏆 CS bss
    *00:29** No is a complete sentence*
    *6:00** CS*

  • @DateSmoothie
    @DateSmoothie 2 года назад +3

    Wise advice and vital information. Thank you, thank you!

  • @getyourlife
    @getyourlife Год назад +1

    Your videos are great as I go through major reinvention

  • @macm2373
    @macm2373 2 года назад +1

    I live by #1 & #4, they go hand in hand!🙌💖

  • @marciamellow1211
    @marciamellow1211 Год назад +4

    Asking my age...I do not tolerate that. period
    Self awareness is crucial, and your self esteem. I have no problem saying no at all, in fact it is a main word for me... No.

  • @laurageil-estrada5034
    @laurageil-estrada5034 Год назад +2

    Private things can also be not giving an account of how many people you associate, hang out, or talk to with….
    You develop certain relationships with various people throughout your life journey…. Giving your partner an account of every single interchange is not necessary, and not important.

  • @AJ-kb9hf
    @AJ-kb9hf 2 года назад +5

    Mostly agree with this. The last one is a little debatable to an extent.

  • @ramparkash2318
    @ramparkash2318 2 года назад +1

    Really another informative video from you . Nice sharing. Keep it up.

  • @dragonfish888
    @dragonfish888 11 месяцев назад

    So grateful for your brief insightful videos! They get right to the point with no fluff. I’m so tired of long videos that say nothing. Keep up the great work!

  • @loveswintertrees
    @loveswintertrees 2 года назад +9

    I have no problem sharing my dating history and I need to know the history of who I’m with. It shows a value pattern

    • @laurageil-estrada5034
      @laurageil-estrada5034 Год назад +1

      This may come with time…. If you and your partner agree to share; or agree not to bother

  • @Helpful4All
    @Helpful4All Год назад

    Thanks for sharing this. Love

  • @nancyinthegarden3160
    @nancyinthegarden3160 2 года назад +4

    Great video thank you it was right on target and you presented it with less waste of time than most.

  • @maecylove4615
    @maecylove4615 2 года назад +6

    Love your vids. Very good content, not long, very informative and helpful. Thank you!

  • @ramparkash2318
    @ramparkash2318 2 года назад +1

    Really beautiful viedo of relationship. Nice sharing. Keep it up.

  • @anfelmerdaci2499
    @anfelmerdaci2499 2 года назад +6

    Love your videos 💓💓💓 keep going queen 👑💖

  • @Angell_Lee
    @Angell_Lee 2 года назад +2

    Wow, thank you!

  • @trishspinazola287
    @trishspinazola287 2 года назад +6

    You have to be selective to be productive!! There is only so much time and energy!!!

  • @anthonysherry2628
    @anthonysherry2628 2 года назад +5

    Yes, No is a complete sentence. So when i said no to something my ex girlfriend wanted, after dating just for a couple of weeks, she thereby said, " i am worth a million dollars.. i have many men waiting for me'.... do you think she is high value? I thought it was a unreasonable demand, and i do not have to indulge the reason why i said no.

    • @explore_with_sagan9596
      @explore_with_sagan9596 2 года назад +2

      It seems you don't mean anything to her yet. No respect for your saying no

    • @Jaxmusicgal23
      @Jaxmusicgal23 9 месяцев назад

      That’s not a high value woman…. she is pressuring you to spend on her because “other men want her”
      She doesn’t want you she wants the idea of a relationship .
      If she wanted you, she wouldn’t care how much money you spent on her because it doesn’t matter … you would matter.
      She’s threatening you that she’s gonna go find another man if you can’t “provide for her” like she wants.
      There’s a ton of RUclipsr, teaching women that that’s “high value” and that’s not true …
      Being a high value woman has nothing to do with money it has to do with your attitude and how you hold yourself and being healthy enough to be desired by other men, while also being respectful of yourself.
      You can be high value and poor or high value and rich as a woman …. It also doesn’t mean you’re going to attract a rich person you’re going to attract a healthy person and know how to tell whether someone is healthy or not…
      This woman is not healthy . She wants to take while you give and that is not a good start to a relationship

  • @mf1779
    @mf1779 2 года назад

    You deserve a million subscribers

  • @hikayatsok
    @hikayatsok 7 месяцев назад

    really your videos are helpful, i love them😍

  • @lov_is_life
    @lov_is_life 2 года назад +2

    Fully agreed with you ma'am 🥰🥰🙏

    • @ramparkash2318
      @ramparkash2318 2 года назад

      RASHMI MUKHERJEE. Buut I'm not agree with your words.

  • @teenafrench7236
    @teenafrench7236 2 года назад +2

    Love this...thank you 🙏💕

  • @sreetamaguha8050
    @sreetamaguha8050 2 года назад +2

    Really love all your videos, I'm slowly trying to heal myself from the man who ghosted me and he is a big narcissistic, he has hurt me a lot and when he came back he said sorry that he won't repeat this behavior and the next day again he ghosted me ! I'm heartbroken but Im trying to recover from this situation. If this time he again comes back 'No I'm not going to forgive him' and the worst part is We study in the same classroom and I've to see his face everyday, he acts so cool as if nothing has happened that hurts a lot. Really disgusted by his behavior,can't tolerate this guy anymore! Please help me get out from this situation.

    • @ramparkash2318
      @ramparkash2318 2 года назад

      Sreetama Guha. You hurt by someone. It's not good for everyone. I would advise you pray to God. Will do better in future.

    • @starcatcher3691
      @starcatcher3691 Год назад

      Sounds like he has issues. You can still forgive him for your sake just not leave yourself vulnerable again

  • @dum.vivimus.vivamus
    @dum.vivimus.vivamus 2 года назад +1

    I love this channel!

    • @Theblackswan55
      @Theblackswan55  2 года назад

      I love the love and support of my community ad well. Thank you for being part of it ❤️❤️

  • @Neelimadar
    @Neelimadar 2 года назад +8

    I think how much money a woman makes or has should also be a secret.

    • @ramparkash2318
      @ramparkash2318 2 года назад

      Neelima Dar. Why.?

    • @zeeee_yt
      @zeeee_yt Год назад

      @@ramparkash2318 why do you want to know how much a woman makes? Are you staying with a girl for her money? I know this will be countered on me so, I'll say this applies on both.

    • @hatchettharley3186
      @hatchettharley3186 Год назад

      I agree. I don’t tell how much I make to anyone. If it’s your husband then he has to know since you are combining resources IMO.

  • @megja1812
    @megja1812 2 года назад +5

    This is so true. Buys you a coffee wants sex …..crazy as. Why would a women of any value want that, what’s in it for her…..nothing at all

    • @starrjohnson1327
      @starrjohnson1327 2 года назад +1

      I had a date tell me forget the coffee and just come to his house! He was an engineer. I was so insulted. I blocked his number.

    • @animavestra6460
      @animavestra6460 Год назад

      ​@@starrjohnson1327& i had lunch with my friend he after that asked me for inappropriate things like he owe me.

  • @amnamir6676
    @amnamir6676 2 года назад +6

    So grateful for your Channel. I’m the oldest and only daughter I. My family , so there has been no older sister educating me about these things.
    You’re my online older sis 🌼

  • @sharonmasundire366
    @sharonmasundire366 2 года назад +1

    Am thankful

  • @gill426
    @gill426 2 года назад +1

    I agree with all of them almost entirely except for the secrets stuff. From my experience, a high value person, be it in a friendship or in a romantic relationship or anything like that, is only of high value to me if they're honest. I am also honest. You certainly don't have to disclose your entire history to a person you've just met but I certainly do not accept dishonesty and keeping big secrets. Relationships should strive more to actually be safe to be honest.

    • @dragonfish888
      @dragonfish888 11 месяцев назад +1

      She literally said, except big secrets.

    • @Jaxmusicgal23
      @Jaxmusicgal23 9 месяцев назад

      That is true.
      But would you tell someone you just met all of your life, secrets and deep, dark struggles?
      No, you wouldn’t .
      And anyone that expects you to tell you those things until they know you well doesn’t respect you as a person ….
      I tend to be more open and honest with my self, but I have found when I am too open and honest it’s usually the people who are going to use that information against me that are good at getting out early before they have to make an emotional bond with you as a friend or romantic partner.
      You won’t even tell a casual friend, your dark thoughts or things that you’re embarrassed that you have done or desired to do unless you really knew that they would not use it against you .
      This is what we were talking about … you have a right to have a personal thought life and things that you don’t reveal right away to people.
      It’s an incremental garden with sections you let people into

  • @apurva797
    @apurva797 2 года назад +3

    Hey do you write the scripts before recording n how you decide the topics n ideas ?

  • @DJJezzebella
    @DJJezzebella 2 года назад +1

    You said to let you know what we would prefer to keep private beyond how many people we've dated in the past in the comments below? This might be a strange example but I hope it helps. I know I'm an uncommon type of personality so try to ignore the fact that when I moved to Los Angeles I actually planned out living in my vehicle strategically for about 3 years before actually making the journey down here because that's not something that usually happens with most people living in their vehicles. Most of them sorta just end up homeless by some kind of circumstance like unrealistic planning or complete lack of planning. I planned it out thoroughly for myself and took my time to make sure I did it right and covered every possibility before I even left all of my friends and a 3 bedroom home in the only area I've ever lived in my whole life. I wanted the motivation to not sleep all day because of my depression issues so stuff like that I don't like to volunteer when I'm first even getting to know someone even as just a friend because homeless people have horrible reputations first of all, the women I guess as I learned well I mean not from compromising my boundaries but from just running into the same baffling, bottom feeders piece of s*** kind of guys over again. It took me forever to realize why I was getting propositioned so much! I guess homeless females have a reputation in general for being completely easy free whores that will do anything for a place to stay?? Well, surprise surprise surprise! That is NOT my story at all.
    After a while it was really starting to bring down my general demeanor and like I say I struggle with depression as it is. This may not mean anything to anyone but it means a whole lot to me and my integrity. Despite having catastrophically strange bad luck of me deciding to make this big move literally just a few months before covid hit (which did put a serious monkey wrench in the whole plan Like having nowhere to shower for almost two months during the summertime?)

    • @DJJezzebella
      @DJJezzebella 2 года назад

      Because with the shutdown needless to say everything shut down including my gym membership at 24-hour fitness that I paid two years in advance for. I figured I was playing it smart because that way since I had nowhere to receive the bills I was living in my car I still would be paid for two years and I'd have a place to shower. Nope. No less and the first couple days the police station, all grocery stores, Even the public parks that had a porta-potty outhouse thing had police guarding them so that people wouldn't use them in order fountains. After an almost full 3 days of not being able to poop anywhere, I figured I'd end up in a hospital from holding it so long and exploding. But the security wouldn't let me use the bathrooms at any of the hospitals either. Were technically closed and would not let anyone use the bathroom even for number 2 grocery stores everything physically locked and closed. I didn't know the police station even had a roll up door that locked or any kind of door that locked because a police station is supposed to be and usually is 24/7 They don't close neither do hospitals. Who could have possibly predicted a pandemic of this proportion no less my lucky timing. Despite, I didn't even give one guy a single kiss on the cheek that I didn't want to. But it was a constant irritating uphill battle because like you said low value men have a sense of entitlement towards sex even when they've done nothing for you. I couldn't figure out why so many horrible men we're trying to act like they were some kind of knight in shining armour saving me the damsel in distress by doing me a favor I didn't want so that I would owe doing them a favor for letting them do something pathetic for me. Most of the time it would be an offer of staying with them a night or two or one night at a motel is if that's going to be a big help to somebody in a situation like that anyway no less isn't that what a guy would pay for even with a real date so they're not being put out either way but they do expect you to put out it was ridiculous and consistent too I was almost doing this like an experiment definitely keeping notes and maybe even planning to do a documentary about it afterwards. I even got one of those clickers that bouncers keep in their hand at most bars to keep a head count of who comes in when they take your ID at the front door? I clicked it every time a guy meet an inappropriate advance of any kind I reached well over a hundred in less than a year of being here and did not take anyone up on their offer of course. Looking back on this now, I think the lowest two propositions and the funniest were the laundry guy and the Taco Bell guy! Yes as bad as it sounds. One guy offered a few items at Taco Bell with a straight face for some kind of sexual repayment. 59? 79? 99? Seriously? Wow. And the other guy offered me a place to do my laundry in exchange for sex. One of my friends asked if that included washing and drying? I said I don't know I gave him your phone number to shut them up! The sad thing is both guys all those guys with their chivalrous offerings acted like they were doing me some big favor. The way they were so prepared in their speeches makes me realize I was not the first person they've used this on before and what's even worse is there must be some girls out there that have put out for something as pathetic as laundry or a $5 fast food meal lowering the bar for the rest of us! I guess this is kind of a known thing amongst some circles of life of the barely human species. So I don't like people knowing that I was I guess technically considered homeless. But there was a big difference. I wasn't sleeping outdoors in any kind of danger. I planned to stay in my vehicle because it was safe, free, and just uncomfortable enough to sleep in that I wouldn't sleep all day and it would force me to get up and take advantage of the reason I was even in this s*** hole city in the first place. And you know what? It worked. It was working exactly as planned. I didn't stay in bed for several days at a time at a depression. I was up every day at some point and even had a little daily routine of where I got my filtered water for free from Starbucks, where I microwaved my canned food at the 7-Eleven, where I charged my phones and took my shower at the gym a few blocks away from where I planned on parking legally without any meters or permit required so that I wouldn't slowly accumulate parking tickets that would eventually get my vehicle towed. All of which was in an area I planned on within less than a mile of all of the people I needed to bump elbows with at places like Starbucks and 7-Elevens. I was meeting people everyday in the industry, getting closer and closer to what I needed. Then the Covidiocracy Coronapocalypse. True not everything went according to planned. If you told me 5 years ago I was going to be in a shelter in Beverly Hills I would have thought you were running a fever crazier than Covid could provide. But it happened. That was probably the hardest period of my life and I expected it to be a huge challenge in my planning beforehand, but just not in the way that it actually went down. Still didn't compromise my virtue one bit because I'm one pain in the ass tough cookie, but, I'm still in the midst of self-esteem repair cuz it did mess with my head a little. No no Don't cry For Me Argentina this has got a good ending. One of the things I wasn't expecting that was positive is that I ended up with permanent housing down here. It wasn't part of the plan because I've given up on the idea of section 8 housing long ago when I lived in the Bay Area. The waiting list to even get on the waiting list to be considered for section 8 in Oakland California is 13 years. All of those years you have to actually still have a mailing provable address that says you live in Oakland until you're up for your chance to get in the pool that is ridiculous to me so I gave up on it completely. Now I am in an apartment, a small studio but it's mine, everything's fine, I'm putting myself back together slowly and trying to make fun of Los Angeles and all its shallowness most especially it's horrible horrible selection of low value men I think this should be actually the lowest value man of all because this has the highest amount of homeless people in the country I bet you if you did one of your area poles that would probably match up. I didn't have to compromise any of my boundaries, but I don't like telling people that even just meeting friends right away because who would believe that story? Like I said I'm a rarity, and I'd like to mention that I've been celibate in abstinence by choice not by circumstance like most guys for five chosen years going on 6th October 31st 2022 this year. and that's been solidly enforced through the that homeless period as well. So that says a lot right there about my character and integrity, but that's why I don't want people knowing at first that I ever went through what they would call homelessness because they it was different for me and I really I know I didn't compromise any of my boundary sexually because that's just the pain in the ass kind of person I am but I don't think people would believe that at first I wouldn't so that's something I would like to keep private even like I said from first meeting new friends. I might eventually tell the guy I'm dating that as I get to know him if he really truly gets me maybe a year or two into our relationship? If he's the right guy, he will see on his own that I'm a woman of integrity. However I would never volunteer that at first. Worst case scenario if I tell him about 2 years in, there's no risk because that's right before I usually break up with somebody anyways. So I could tell him that as I'm serving him divorce papers from the relationship?! That way if he tries to use it against me like you were saying or doesn't believe me he was moving out anyways? Ha!! Or maybe let's have unrealistic expectations in a Cinderella movie maybe that would be the moment he would see I was the one and that would be my glass slipper? Okay I know this is an obscure example but I hope that helps?

  • @mushroomzulu
    @mushroomzulu 2 года назад +8

    Starting a relationship off on a lie is not a good idea and not something a high value woman would do. Your past is part of you. Hiding these things also shows that you really haven't gotten past them.

    • @mayowaoyedokun9828
      @mayowaoyedokun9828 2 года назад +4

      Neither do I owe a duty to disclose them, you have to earn the right to them with time

    • @starcatcher3691
      @starcatcher3691 Год назад

      It's not necessary to disclose it all. Its best to be in the moment.

    • @zeeee_yt
      @zeeee_yt Год назад +1

      Not necessary. Like women, men also have their past. So would you openly tell A, B, Cs of your ex relationships without the fear of being judged by your date?

    • @Jaxmusicgal23
      @Jaxmusicgal23 9 месяцев назад

      Withholding telling someone everything about you on the first date or the second or third it’s not lying…
      If they ask directly and you say I’m sorry I don’t feel like our relationship is close enough to have this discussion yet …. That’s not lying.
      Lying is when they ask you direct question and you actually lie and say the opposite answer then what is true… then when you go try to tell the truth there will be problems.
      But if you are kindly, honest and say, I’ve just met you and I don’t feel comfortable having this conversation yet until I know whether or not things are going to be serious between the two of us ….. that is not a lie that is being honest.
      No one deserves your life story the moment they meet you … no one deserves to know the mistakes you’ve made, and what you’ve learned from them just because they might be a possible relationship.
      I’ve made this mistake before and has burned me in the rear end . I tell people way too much when I first meet them.
      This last time I met some friends, I took my time and waited until they earned my trust . Things went way better and I could figure out who is playing and who is actually genuine friend. I also learned which friends I can discuss certain things with and which ones I cannot, because they don’t understand. Not every relationship is meant to be the all in all everything. Some people can’t handle some parts of you and that takes time to learn. The last thing you want is to have a ton of information on you and they turn out to be some awful person gossiping about you behind your back and then all of your problems and all all of your secrets are open to anyone they knew.
      It’s important to know what a person is how they act when things go wrong before you divulge too much …. You should expect it of others as well.

  • @MsLotusBlooms
    @MsLotusBlooms 2 года назад +1

    I do all of them

  • @lalaacosta4818
    @lalaacosta4818 2 года назад +3

    I love this!!! I'm actually doing it right, and I didn't even know it!!! ❤️❤️❤️😊😂 the first talking point- I call the "rule of no", and it was a game changer for me. The rest have come at their own time, but that was the one that really empowered me, and made the biggest positive impact!! 💯

  • @terraiznajem105
    @terraiznajem105 Год назад

    Thank you

  • @Newgrist
    @Newgrist 2 года назад +12

    Can a high value woman endure loneliness and desperation, even to what appears to her to be her breaking point, for the sake of maintaining her high value?

    • @abeautifulcountry9353
      @abeautifulcountry9353 2 года назад +24

      Better to feel lonely with boundaries and your own self respect than lonely in a toxic relationship knowing you betrayed yourself for 'love' that turned out to be crumbs.

    • @Newgrist
      @Newgrist 2 года назад +9

      It is a strong woman who takes that first option.

    • @shadiap
      @shadiap 2 года назад +5

      @@abeautifulcountry9353 👍🏻 perfect

    • @ladolcevita5582
      @ladolcevita5582 2 года назад +3

      Being high value is good, but sometimes I’d prefer causal date as long as it’s playful and fun. Enjoy life❤

    • @BlueJeansandJellyBeans
      @BlueJeansandJellyBeans 2 года назад +5

      The right person will show up. Don't give in, you eventually will be miserable from what you "tolerated" to have that connection.

  • @sum6903
    @sum6903 2 года назад +1

    Secret garden..how much I earn, my age , savings, etc

  • @PinkyPanther11
    @PinkyPanther11 2 года назад +4

    Yup number 3… I’m
    Clearly low value. Took 16 years in marriage

    • @msanchagrin
      @msanchagrin 8 месяцев назад

      You are not low value....You are high value....maybe you just have not realized it yet.

  • @g.mitchell8915
    @g.mitchell8915 Год назад +1

    Where is boundary #6?

  • @komakino0
    @komakino0 2 года назад +8

    Ladies, how do you delay intimacy in the right &feminine way? I came to a stage in my life where I don't even want to be intimate with someone at dating stage...But let's be realistic, without intimacy things don't progress to relationships in our times, do they? Any insights, much appreciated

    • @lede1810
      @lede1810 2 года назад +1

      It all depends on your age and his. If you don’t want intimacy by dating, then what are you looking for? You can have a discussion with him early on about what he’s looking for and see if it matches your reasons. Let’s not forget that intimacy is a big motivation for men under 70, so if you’re not attracted by him and don’t want that within a couple of months, then don’t waste your time and his. Most men may expect intimacy within a month, even weeks of meeting.

    • @komakino0
      @komakino0 2 года назад +1

      @@lede1810 thanks for sharing your insight Le De. I am 36 and he is 39. You are right, communication and being honest is the only way to go and probably the feminine way as well. I do want intimacy as well of course but I have experienced several dating situations where after intimacy was early and things did not work out well later. Maybe they were too quick and I just needed a little bit more time.

    • @lede1810
      @lede1810 2 года назад +1

      @@komakino0 I hear you. Too early can take away the emotional bonding and build up which make intimacy that much more meaningful. If he's a decent and classy guy then he'd let you know in a tasteful way that he'd eventually want intimacy, normal at 39. You can play the seductive game to let him know by your actions that you're interested (how you dress, being cute and playful, smiling, remembering what he likes, etc). If you see that he's reciprocating your affections and is deserving of them, you can approach him slowly, holding hands, hugs, etc., until you're comfortable being in close proximity together. Best of luck to you

    • @komakino0
      @komakino0 2 года назад +1

      @@lede1810 thats a sweet one, really liked your insights:) thank you ! xx

    • @mellyo7262
      @mellyo7262 2 года назад +3

      Tough! So what if they expect it… if you don’t want to - don’t! Move on. It’s your body!

  • @ApollonianShy18
    @ApollonianShy18 2 года назад +1

    high-value women dont need someone s investments to allow themselves what they want... or how that ”investing” works...

  • @ashavilas8576
    @ashavilas8576 2 года назад +1

    🙏 true

  • @LK-pb4no
    @LK-pb4no 2 года назад +1

    So what are the five things. She goes on forever on one point! I got three of them.

  • @nicolii7321
    @nicolii7321 2 года назад +2

    You know what? Sometimes abuse comes right after you're trapped with kids and it's too difficult to leave. At that stage, good luck to the woman who is capable of looking after 3 kids, one being autistic and violent, the child being sent home from school each week, with no sleep at all and maintaining a job to pay for them. On top of this, if I were to end a relationship after one warning of being insulted, I would be forever single. Every couple fights.

    • @feliciaboston6365
      @feliciaboston6365 Год назад

      Then give the kids to adoption. Some of you make your own lives harder

    • @nicolii7321
      @nicolii7321 Год назад

      @@feliciaboston6365 then the kid is abused even worse and you build yourself bad karma.

  • @philipbre
    @philipbre 2 года назад +2

    Suggestion. Use "no" as well as be honest in being interested or not (and show you are interested if you are!). But nah, instead you play games, and we must always guess.
    Don't want to see sex as currency, don't let him pay for you. Get a job. It's that simple. He also doesn't owe you ANYTHING.
    Abuse is totally unacceptable, but woman go to those men like a moth to a flame, because other men are "too nice".
    The amount of times a woman arrived on time to a date, I can count on my one hand.
    Woman have the biggest secrets. And we do want to know how many men you have dated, because there is a legitimate link between that and the chances of having a long term relationship with you.
    Here's what I, as a man see as high value in a woman:
    From a stable home (parents not divorced)
    Looks after herself (no, we don't like obesity)
    Accepts responsibility.
    Does not waste men's time for free drinks and meals. Don't like the guy? PAY FOR YOUR SELF.
    Have a job. And be able to pay your end of your bills.
    Wasn't the town bicycle.

  • @journeyoflife6168
    @journeyoflife6168 2 года назад +1

    But don't you think thats like hiding a part of you? Or lack of trust in your partner ? Surely you won't say your deepest secrets or past things to a person whom you met yesterday or just recently ,as trust takes time to build but as the relationship moves further n deeper I think past should be discussed not for any judgement but to know the person better . everyone has done mistakes, faced failures, rejections etc but that doesn't define a person as anyone who decides can change completely!! Instead talking abt these things will increase the mental n emotional intimacy ! Instead you should ask that person n see how he/she overcame it , what they learned out of it n how their character was shaped frm that event in past , have they become better from that?! Because past is nothing to be shamed for as it leads to growth of a person. Past or mistakes whtever have made you the person you are today obviously it depends upon that person whether he/she wants to change themselves , become better or bitter , learn n grow or go down a wrong path but by asking right questions this would surely help in building strong relations.

  • @rosario7491
    @rosario7491 2 года назад +1

    💎

  • @dmtdreamz7706
    @dmtdreamz7706 2 года назад +2

    Pooping mind is creating the entire fucking universe and you discover that that's you who's been doing it the whole time. It's utterly shocking and astounding. It's so astounding that you won't want to believe it because people have told you all it's egotistical to say that you're pooping. Only a narcissist would claim that he's pooping. You're imagining the entire fucking universe. What does that make you? That makes you pooping. Reality is pure imagination. Tada.

  • @dr.franciscanishatotalheal
    @dr.franciscanishatotalheal 2 года назад +1

    And what if your partner comes to know about your previous affairs from others?Is it not better to tell about them ourselves?

    • @ramparkash2318
      @ramparkash2318 2 года назад +1

      Dr Francisca nish Ali. Ur question is so smart.

    • @dr.franciscanishatotalheal
      @dr.franciscanishatotalheal 2 года назад

      I feel this is brain drain from poor countries to the richer ones. There should be one world one currency!!!

    • @ramparkash2318
      @ramparkash2318 2 года назад +1

      @@dr.franciscanishatotalheal . Another beautiful words from you.

    • @ramparkash2318
      @ramparkash2318 2 года назад +1

      @@dr.franciscanishatotalheal I'm agree with your words.One world one currency.

    • @ramparkash2318
      @ramparkash2318 2 года назад +1

      @@dr.franciscanishatotalheal . Good morning. Have a great day.

  • @pixiefairygodsangel9165
    @pixiefairygodsangel9165 2 года назад +1

    Wrong! If you cannot Sense that the person is cheating you, then you're low vibration. This ain't have to do with being force to have sex if you already knew that you won't want to do it with latter, you will never make yourself appear in front of him alone or give him any chances to get near you.

  • @curtistinemiller4646
    @curtistinemiller4646 2 года назад +1

    Let your yes be yes and your No be No anything other than that comes from the evil one........Matthew 5;;37.

  • @xikmatyusuf2603
    @xikmatyusuf2603 2 года назад

    He most ask if Iam jealous lady or not.

  • @welshlady212000
    @welshlady212000 Год назад

    Girl … your too funny.

  • @chandnipradhan9932
    @chandnipradhan9932 2 года назад +1

  • @rose-of-theoasis
    @rose-of-theoasis 2 года назад

    What is “critical age”?! What do you mean?

  • @alexandernikitin3331
    @alexandernikitin3331 Год назад

    So marriage would be considered a big secret, but number of sexual partners in the past is a small thing? Men is in control of marriage, as he is the one to propose, women is in control of sex, as she is the one who has final word. Men see women promiscuity as commitment to every partner she had, the same way women see mens proposal. What if I say that I had 10 partners in the past I was engaged to? No woman would ever feel so special anymore…

  • @divineempress7188
    @divineempress7188 Год назад

    💯💯💯💯💯

  • @Goddess.7
    @Goddess.7 2 года назад +2

    👏👏💚

  • @Imawhiteboard
    @Imawhiteboard Год назад

    Scenario she's looking for future stability and commitment he wants to take it one day at a time. Is this a red flag,?

    • @Theblackswan55
      @Theblackswan55  Год назад +1

      If his 'one day at a time' last more than a month or two max

  • @starrjohnson1327
    @starrjohnson1327 Год назад

    If a man asks how many partners I've had he's done. That has nothing to do with the date. Some will ask that to see how quick they can sleep with you. No no. Bye bye👋

  • @marlajacques6947
    @marlajacques6947 2 года назад +10

    Also: keep up on current affairs, you’ll sound like a knob if you don’t know what’s happening in the world.
    Have a sense of humour, some of you ladies are so uptight. Crack a few one liners, tease him a bit, have a laugh.
    Act like a lady, dress like a lady. Our grandmothers did and knew what was up.
    Be busy and don’t put him first right away, he has to earn his way up.

  • @epuffglobal7719
    @epuffglobal7719 2 года назад

    A "high value man" is a man with look, money, game and status. A "high value women" is a women with ...boundaries? Try "intimacy is not currency" with a high value man (or any man) and you will stay single.

  • @CA_CFAaspirant
    @CA_CFAaspirant 9 месяцев назад

    Walking away from verbal abuse implies also during sex in bed?

  • @tanyakashyap6944
    @tanyakashyap6944 2 года назад +1

    💜💜💜

  • @bilalkhares9337
    @bilalkhares9337 2 года назад +1

    1. Saying no without justification is childish and off putting
    2. When dating I agree in marriage absolutely not
    3. I agree but don't rush to call everything abusive as is the trend nowadays
    4. Good mindset to keep yourself single
    5. Good mindset to keep yourself single

  • @anitahendricks
    @anitahendricks 2 года назад +1

  • @christhesingledad8799
    @christhesingledad8799 2 года назад

    What’s financial abuse you make them pay for their share of the bill? And body count is super important it reveals the type of woman your involved with. It shows past behaviour, and proves a woman’s value. High body count low value she will always seek a new lover.

  • @ThelmaThais1
    @ThelmaThais1 2 года назад +2

    So 99% of women remain single or turn lesbian, great! i walked away, did exactly what is said here and lost EVERYTHING included my wealth, dignity, pets, lands, houses, great!

  • @born2-4jesusbianca8
    @born2-4jesusbianca8 9 месяцев назад

    I just unsubscribed if many videos are members only. Disappointed

  • @anthonypierre3350
    @anthonypierre3350 2 года назад +1

    Define a so called high value women ....... I bet you them women can not even cook ....... Stchuiiiiiiiiiiipppppppp !!!

  • @valeriaVPV
    @valeriaVPV 2 года назад +1

    Either you are high value or you are not, i do not belive that is a skill you could be tought off.

    • @Theblackswan55
      @Theblackswan55  2 года назад +15

      I have to disagree...I am confident that I can help any woman become high value if she is willing to put in the work.

    • @postagirl26
      @postagirl26 2 года назад +10

      If you consider yourself “high value” , I’m pretty sure you were taught or groomed to be. Sounds like you don’t want others to be privy to mannerisms that have a positive effect on a woman’s self esteem.

    • @abeautifulcountry9353
      @abeautifulcountry9353 2 года назад +5

      Of course it's a skill you can learn. It is educating yourself in how you should behave for self-respect.

    • @tstar5944
      @tstar5944 2 года назад +6

      Everything is a skill. Comes with a mindset. Or u must be modeled this as a child.
      Nobody is born high value. These are learned through upbringing.

    • @AwakenedSoul101
      @AwakenedSoul101 2 года назад

      Anything can be taught and learned. Don’t limit yourself

  • @adnb268
    @adnb268 2 года назад

    Absolute and utter nonsense. Men should avoid these kind of women like the plague.

    • @user-dn4fu8uy2q
      @user-dn4fu8uy2q 2 года назад +2

      If you can't appreciate a woman like this, it's your loss

    • @adnb268
      @adnb268 2 года назад

      @@user-dn4fu8uy2q There's nothing to appreciate about such a woman. Men want women who are attractive, agreeable, submissive and loyal. Women need to understand that.

    • @user-dn4fu8uy2q
      @user-dn4fu8uy2q 2 года назад

      Troll

    • @adnb268
      @adnb268 2 года назад

      @@user-dn4fu8uy2q is that your best intelligent answer?

    • @MsLotusBlooms
      @MsLotusBlooms 2 года назад +3

      @@adnb268 Women can still be those things and set boundaries!

  • @water206
    @water206 2 года назад

    @metamorphosis