90 Day Fiancé - (Kim & Usman #1) - Last Chance - Therapist Reaction

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  • Опубликовано: 18 сен 2024
  • Dr. Kirk Honda, couples therapist, reacts to 90 Day Fiancé: Before the 90 Days - Kim and Usman. Includes clips from 90 Day: Before the 90 Days, Season 5.
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Комментарии • 295

  • @EmpressEllie
    @EmpressEllie 2 года назад +419

    It breaks my heart when people say that they are a certain age and don’t have another chance at love. My grandmother was single, essentially waiting to die for at least 20 years after my grandfather died. She just gave up! And then what happened? She fell, broke her hip and had to go into an assisted living home, met a man and fell in love! She was in her mid 80’s! You’re never too old to find love!!!

    • @marce5335
      @marce5335 2 года назад +26

      that's so cute

    • @angeleyes3386
      @angeleyes3386 2 года назад +20

      ❤️ I place blame of society. One can be strong-minded and still battle against how society views age

    • @EmpressEllie
      @EmpressEllie 2 года назад +17

      @@marce5335 you should have heard how she giggled when she said his name “Frank”. Was the best thing to come out of a sad situation. I’m glad she died knowing she was loved.

    • @EmpressEllie
      @EmpressEllie 2 года назад +13

      @@angeleyes3386 very true! It’s deeply ingrained in us, quite like standard of “beauty”.

    • @once.upon.a.time.
      @once.upon.a.time. 2 года назад +24

      I worked at an assisted living retirement community, and I can DEFINITELY confirm there is plenty of possibility for love late in life 😁

  • @susanmuecke7160
    @susanmuecke7160 2 года назад +372

    Absolutely not her final chance. I met my lover when I was 63, three years of happiness

    • @LadyArdent
      @LadyArdent 2 года назад +20

      🤩 that’s wonderful. So happy for you & thank you for sharing.

    • @EmpressEllie
      @EmpressEllie 2 года назад +11

      Amazing!!! I love love!!!

    • @sarah3796
      @sarah3796 2 года назад +5

      Aaawww 😍

    • @perit7140
      @perit7140 2 года назад +3

      I wish mine didn’t give up on dating

    • @julia-rf4ql
      @julia-rf4ql 2 года назад +3

      this is great

  • @bonusvampirus
    @bonusvampirus 2 года назад +124

    I'll never forget when my dad was complaining about his love-life and said something to the effect of "What woman would want a broke, 65-year-old cancer survivor?"
    And I kind of shrugged and said, "Probably plenty of 65-year-old women."
    He laughed in my face and said "OH HELL NO!"
    I didn't mention the cancer. I didn't mention the financial situation. The one thing I suggested was that he consider dating women his own age, and he out-right dismissed the idea.
    It's incredible to me. Why would you be out-right against dating someone your own age? I'm a lesbian, and as I've gotten older (now entering my 30s), the women I date have also gotten older. But my dad feels like there's no point in dating if he can't get a woman under 40 while he's in his 70s.
    I have a lot of sympathy for Big Ed's daughter, sometimes. While I agree that relationships with age differences can be very healthy and fulfilling, I also relate to the frustration of gently suggesting to your father that his dating life might go better if he dated women closer to his own age, only to get responses that imply women expire at 45 like food in the back of the refrigerator.

    • @colineviche792
      @colineviche792 2 года назад +11

      I would love to know what he would say to you if you said « what about me? I won’t be loveable anymore in my 40s? »

    • @bonusvampirus
      @bonusvampirus 2 года назад +7

      @@colineviche792 He would probably say that *he'll* always love me, but that doesn't mean that a husband would.

    • @BeckBeckGo
      @BeckBeckGo 2 года назад +2

      No offense, but he’s still single, isn’t he?

    • @bonusvampirus
      @bonusvampirus 2 года назад +5

      @@BeckBeckGo He is and I’m not offended at all.

    • @alongfellow4147
      @alongfellow4147 Год назад +2

      It's mind boggling really

  • @francinesmith9396
    @francinesmith9396 2 года назад +101

    Kirk is 51? I knew he had to be older based on his accomplishments, but if I had to guess, I'd say 38. That's amazing! What do you eat for breakfast? :D

    • @sakurakitsune6947
      @sakurakitsune6947 2 года назад +11

      51? Damnit I wouldn't give him a day more than 35

  • @kirstinallan
    @kirstinallan 2 года назад +235

    Is she really ok with her partner being with other people? She said she divorced her husband because he slept with other women. I wonder if she is lowering her standards and choosing a man who is openly polygamous because she doesn’t want to be blindsided with infidelity again

    • @angeleyes3386
      @angeleyes3386 2 года назад +10

      🎯🎯

    • @dissidentcrusher
      @dissidentcrusher 2 года назад +35

      It hurts to see a woman being a pick-me at her age. She shouldn't have to lower her standards to this level.

    • @EmpressEllie
      @EmpressEllie 2 года назад +21

      I think you are onto something. I once dated a poly man, even though I’m monogamous by nature. The part that drew me in was knowing that I wasn’t going to be cheated on and that external desires would be communicated and have boundaries etc. I had traumatically been cheated on in previous relationships, so it was almost refreshing to think of that as a possibilty. In the end, it didn’t work out, partially because some (not all!) people will use polyamory as an easy out to cheat anyways without communicating. It wasn’t for me… like I said, I’m monogamous. I do know several people it works well for though and really respect that!

    • @lynnhanson2169
      @lynnhanson2169 2 года назад

      Ya think, lol?

    • @lynnhanson2169
      @lynnhanson2169 2 года назад

      Lemon lemon lemon she won a crapfest. Cherry cherry cherry we get to watch.

  • @JuliaRoshambo
    @JuliaRoshambo 2 года назад +94

    take a shot every time Kirk says "Kenny and Armando are possibly the best relationship that's ever existed in reality TV."

    • @JuliaRoshambo
      @JuliaRoshambo 2 года назад +11

      i'm drunk

    • @mmmmmmm3931
      @mmmmmmm3931 2 года назад +3

      @@JuliaRoshambo ok

    • @ursaminor9780
      @ursaminor9780 2 года назад +2

      I don’t drink alcohol, but there’s quite a few empty water bottles on my counter, hehe

    • @JuliaRoshambo
      @JuliaRoshambo 2 года назад +2

      @@ursaminor9780 you'll be so hydrated! lol

  • @vspurchase
    @vspurchase 2 года назад +72

    Usman needs funds to invest in his music career, and a Nigerian woman with funds would not marry him. so, he searches the internet for gullible older women he can fool into giving him their money.

  • @thornor85
    @thornor85 2 года назад +106

    I am 36, and already absolutely feel the pressure of “if this doesn’t work out, I am out of chances.” It was something that crossed my mind a lot during a recent heartbreak, but in the end I decided I needed to be my honest and authentic self rather than molding to someone as I did in previous relationships. I still feel that gnawing feeling that my prime years are long gone. I needed my 20s and early 30s to recover from significant trauma but now i absolutely relate to that “last chance” distortion.

    • @perit7140
      @perit7140 2 года назад +3

      Have you thought of freezing your eggs? That might take the pressure off finding someone now, if you want children

    • @nyxnecrodragon4256
      @nyxnecrodragon4256 2 года назад +12

      @@perit7140 That is insanely expensive. At least 5K just for one cycle sometimes you can knock down the price a tiny bit if you join egg sharing programs but you have to have no underlying health problems. I was actually in a similar position to Sarah. My best friend and I had a pact that if by the time I was 35 and still single with no prospects we'd have a baby together. He's now my husband.

    • @lanagustafson2905
      @lanagustafson2905 2 года назад +5

      Yes it’s really hard not to let those thoughts in. I’m 35 and been single for years

    • @JLynnEchelon
      @JLynnEchelon 2 года назад +4

      Yeah, same. I've completely given up in trying to date. I'm just totally over it and learning to be cool with being alone. I'm just so worried about someone like Kim who is in a frame of mind that she's going to be willing to put up with things she shouldn't.

    • @RosaX305
      @RosaX305 2 года назад +4

      I’m 38, will be 39 in three weeks and I feel the same way. But I’m not having kids so I’m not in any rush to find the perfect husband. I had a lot of fun in my 20s and 30s so why stop the party now!?

  • @lisaess6514
    @lisaess6514 2 года назад +59

    The thing with her and multiple wives is one, her mom claims she changes her personality to please the people she’s around and two, she herself says how important loyalty is to her. These two combined are red flags to me. It’s great that she’s saying she respects his culture, which she can do but she can also say that polygamy is not for her.

  • @annieclarf5367
    @annieclarf5367 2 года назад +75

    I recently started fostering dogs and your videos and podcasts are legitimately great background calming noise for them. I even play you in my pocket while walking them sometimes 😂

  • @thriftcraft
    @thriftcraft 2 года назад +40

    50+ men on dating sites thing is funny because I'm 34 and the idea of dating someone that much older? Nahhhh

  • @lynnhanson2169
    @lynnhanson2169 2 года назад +33

    My hubs was a first time groom at age 52!!! Dove into two teen stepkids, he still knocks it out of the park, daily!

    • @IsMiseAine
      @IsMiseAine 2 года назад +5

      That's really great but you don't mention how old you are? I think the point here is that there is a different standard set for women and men when it comes to these things 😕

  • @rhiannonbeccachickensen6999
    @rhiannonbeccachickensen6999 2 года назад +39

    Completely agreed about cultural difference over age difference. In Seminole Indian culture, older women marry much younger men a lot and it’s no big deal. If anything the issue would come down to personal tensions between each other’s families since we’ve all grown up knowing each other. As long as we find partners who respect our culture and families we really don’t care

  • @haleymist09
    @haleymist09 2 года назад +31

    The skit Dr. Honda's thinking of with Tina Fey and Julia Louis-Dreyfus is "The Last F---able Day." They're having a little picnic and then Julia rows off in a row boat smoking a cigar to go do her laundry, lol.

  • @eaglesfan4life996
    @eaglesfan4life996 2 года назад +37

    It’s baby girl Kim...I do wish that she finds love but I can’t believe Usman is the one. She needs a mature guy.

  • @Yordieq
    @Yordieq 2 года назад +67

    Hi Dr Kirk. We haven't heard updates about Lisa because some time before the tell all, it was reported that she had called Usman the n word and has since been fired from TLC.

    • @pinkpugginz
      @pinkpugginz 2 года назад +21

      That was one disgusting broad

    • @eloiselogue
      @eloiselogue 2 года назад +3

      whoa!

    • @EmpressEllie
      @EmpressEllie 2 года назад +8

      Ooof I don’t follow the storyline, but good riddance! She should be fired for that! Totally unacceptable!

    • @koobie83
      @koobie83 2 года назад +5

      Wooooow! Hence why she’s disappeared. Makes sense.

    • @julissahernandez8402
      @julissahernandez8402 2 года назад +8

      I think she also scammed him I read somewhere she stole thousands of dollars from him but don’t quote me on that.

  • @krisg7259
    @krisg7259 2 года назад +106

    I like Kim. I don’t want to see her get hurt.

    • @eaglesfan4life996
      @eaglesfan4life996 2 года назад +22

      She comes across too desperate. She needs therapy to heal herself.

    • @1977jenna
      @1977jenna 2 года назад +2

      Me too... I just kept thinking through the clip: please don't hurt her! She's so nice ❣️

    • @traceyarnaud8433
      @traceyarnaud8433 2 года назад +8

      That's why her friends don't want her to do this. They know, just like the rest of us, what is going to happen. Her friends are trying to protect her from herself, they aren't purposely being non-supportive. I think Kim had something happen to her as a teenager, and so she is stuck in a mindset of a much younger and more naive person.

    • @denisecounts5381
      @denisecounts5381 2 года назад +1

      Me too

  • @raspberrykissable
    @raspberrykissable 2 года назад +41

    The thing is these women who are desperate put themselves in a position to be taken advantage of. I think this is why their friends and family are concerned. Thank you for another great analysis Dr. Honda.

  • @sarahp8937
    @sarahp8937 2 года назад +24

    Interesting the number of cast members who have said this is their 'last chance'. Darcey and Big Ed both come to mind

  • @skylamei
    @skylamei 2 года назад +10

    It’s been awhile since I’ve watched you and I forgot how much I loved “hey deserving listeners.” Makes you feel so good 😊

  • @bajabarracuda4634
    @bajabarracuda4634 2 года назад +25

    I’ve seen some comments saying that because she was upset that her ex-husband cheated, she isn’t actually ok with Usman having other wives. Which could be true but it could also be true that it was the lying and secrets that caused the divorce rather than the non monogamy. So maybe she would be ok with a poly relationship that had no secrets or lies.

  • @mariet7305
    @mariet7305 2 года назад +8

    So the unedited Tell All with Lisa and Usman leaked on RUclips for 3 hours before it was taken down. Usman revealed that Lisa often called him a racial slur used against African-Americans. I believe so many things have happened behind the scenes before they got divorced.

  • @jagmaster6595
    @jagmaster6595 2 года назад +13

    I finished my psych 101 class!!! Watching your videos has helped me a lot!!

  • @AprilT72
    @AprilT72 2 года назад +47

    We need a separate channel with Dr Honda reviewing music.

  • @TheLoneWanderersBunker
    @TheLoneWanderersBunker 2 года назад +36

    This is my hypothesis on the age gap shaming/repulsion/concern. So, people are always quick to say, "you are old enough to be their parent" (which might conjure thoughts of incest or other perversions), and they say something like this to shock or shame because they can't find the words to ask helpful questions about the relationship or share their concerns.
    When I think about huge age gaps, I get worried that the relationship may not be healthy in terms of a power dynamic, or if-like Kim, she has children around Usman's age, will she end up asserting a mothering role, rather than that of a lover?
    There is nothing wrong with the idea of falling in love or loving someone who is not in your age group, but I think you have to think seriously about what your goals are for the relationship. Do you share common interests, etc.?
    Anyway, just y two cents worth.

    • @trekstarsam2494
      @trekstarsam2494 2 года назад +2

      So true, usually there is a power imbalance, the younger person being with the older one for benefits, 9/10 they are never on the same economic level.

    • @revinaque1342
      @revinaque1342 2 года назад +3

      My thoughts on huge age gaps are more along the lines of, "Do you see yourselves building a future with each other? Do you have the same goals for your life together?" Because if one person is nearing retirement and looking to settle down into a quiet retiree life, but their partner is still in the process of building their career with plans to travel the world, there's definitely a huge disconnect there.

    • @BeckBeckGo
      @BeckBeckGo 2 года назад

      @@trekstarsam2494 or the older person controlling and manipulating the younger one. That’s a much more concerning possibility.

  • @Am-dh9gq
    @Am-dh9gq 2 года назад +15

    You should do 1000 pound sisters and why Tammy thinks she's so entitled and don't want to do nothing but thinks she's not hurting no one but is

    • @oneof134
      @oneof134 2 года назад +2

      Oh god no I hope he doesn't even touch on that show..😬

    • @AlicePDaly
      @AlicePDaly 2 года назад +1

      I think Tammy is showing major control/abandonment anxiety defences. I don't think she's a awful as she acts at face value

    • @Am-dh9gq
      @Am-dh9gq 2 года назад

      @@AlicePDaly I can't figure her out she just keeps getting worse

  • @Sarah-gm9tq
    @Sarah-gm9tq 2 года назад +9

    The face that dr Kirk affirmed Kenny and Armando are relationship goals is what gives me hope

  • @koobie83
    @koobie83 2 года назад +20

    Dr Honda - do you think there’s more stigma over older women in relationships with younger men because of the stigma women have over our right to be sexual beings once we pass our fertile years and the fact that our culture tends to see mothers as being asexual beings only interested in the care for their children and not as individual women?

    • @onceuponacrime9307
      @onceuponacrime9307 2 года назад +3

      I’m 53 That’s your culture beauty comes from within & age is just a number. That’s not an issue at all in my culture. Stay strong girl x

  • @haleymist09
    @haleymist09 2 года назад +22

    Oh my goooood this show has been on so long people are now showing up again! This show is eating it's own tail lol.

  • @JasmineDev
    @JasmineDev 2 года назад +4

    I just turned 55. Been single since I was 40. I don't want an old man, and that is the only age group who look at women my age. I prefer to enjoy my life without worrying about any man's opinion. I am free!

  • @lavinder11
    @lavinder11 2 года назад +17

    And I couldn't be friends with someone who wanted unconditional support. I think she has doubts about the relationship to begin with and was upset that her friends were voicing her deep concerns.

    • @asunnywebb
      @asunnywebb 2 года назад +12

      I agree. I'm a friend, not a mindless cheerleader. I have to tell others when I'm concerned for them.

    • @hedyeherfani5729
      @hedyeherfani5729 2 года назад +7

      I'm with you on this. If someone can't handle my opinion, that's on them, not on me. If they are secure and sure of themselves, they'll view my opinion as just that, an opinion.

    • @traceyarnaud8433
      @traceyarnaud8433 2 года назад +3

      @@asunnywebb I agree! I disagree with the doc on this issue. Mindless support is not friendship.

  • @moomoocachoo9025
    @moomoocachoo9025 2 года назад +31

    Since you brought up the MJ allegations, here's a question for you Dr. Honda. When someone you admire, like a famous person, does something horrific, how do you reconcile between the horrible act they did with the joy that they brought you before you found out?

    • @jagmaster6595
      @jagmaster6595 2 года назад +6

      I’ve heard separate art from artist, and as a Kanye fan I do that often. To be fair Kanye is mentally unwell and not have committed any crimes

    • @m.r.e.5731
      @m.r.e.5731 2 года назад +1

      Good question. I loved Bill Cosby's wit and public persona. It's difficult to reconcile that fatherly, affable figure with his despicable acts.

    • @koobie83
      @koobie83 2 года назад

      @@jagmaster6595 I was such a big Kanye fan too. It makes me so sad to see him so unhappy.
      He was so happy when he was with Amber. Everything fell apart mentally after that.

    • @TrangPhamNguyen
      @TrangPhamNguyen 2 года назад +3

      Ohhh great question! I hope podwife flags this for him to comment in his commentary video!

    • @jacquelinele9170
      @jacquelinele9170 2 года назад +1

      I think he did a video called psychology of Michael Jackson, and other videos of similarly controversial celebrities, where they kind of talk about how they reconcile separating the art from the artist. Can't remember what they actually said though.. 😅

  • @beekay9607
    @beekay9607 2 года назад +9

    I felt like people don’t see the age difference with Kenny and Armando because they’re men. People are way harder on women.

  • @Redwoodbay25
    @Redwoodbay25 2 года назад +12

    I would love to see you evaluate Tammy from 1,000 lb sisters 🙏

  • @vesbarrow
    @vesbarrow 2 года назад +7

    Lisa was fired from TLC because she went on a rant on social media and said the n-word. Subsequently, she and Usman divorced.

  • @midwifek
    @midwifek 2 года назад +9

    Lisa and Usman break up/divorce played out on social media. It wasn’t covered on camera. Lisa is now remarried

  • @Jimbonusonza
    @Jimbonusonza 2 года назад +41

    I remember a video floating around in early 2021 with Lisa setting the wedding dress on fire and posting photos of her with another man (from the states).
    Also heard about her being fired by TLC for what she said as well. My wife and I don't mind Usman but this same storyline repeating makes us think he's using the show as more of a platform for his music.

    • @belindacarter6872
      @belindacarter6872 2 года назад +1

      As TLC is using Usman to get viewers as well

    • @des8336
      @des8336 2 года назад +3

      Everybody’s using everybody for something, oh well.

    • @abeautifulcountry9353
      @abeautifulcountry9353 2 года назад

      Of course he is using TLC for his platform. He is storyline is entertaining and one can even admire his dedication and drive to be successful. But sadly his love interests in the show will get hurt badly as a result and that's very uncomfortable to watch.

  • @diaryofanotdgirl89
    @diaryofanotdgirl89 2 года назад +10

    Omgggggggg been waiting for this one!!!! Here goes 💪🏽

  • @RockyDaTherapist
    @RockyDaTherapist 2 года назад +10

    It does seem like she’s not being realistic. He’s saying different hotel rooms, you’re a “potential” girlfriend. He’s not saying he’s falling for her. I’m worried for her that he’s inviting as a friend to see his video shoot and not a romantic partner.

    • @abeautifulcountry9353
      @abeautifulcountry9353 2 года назад +2

      Yes Usman is very careful and clever in what he says, as when she inevitably finds out that he was didn't have any romantic intentions and was using her, he will say but I didn't promise anything etc etc

  • @marvelencyclopedia
    @marvelencyclopedia 2 года назад +16

    What god or goddess did Dr Honda pray to for eternal youth? I always forget he's 51!

  • @theorizzinal
    @theorizzinal 2 года назад +7

    We haven’t seen updates on Baby Girl Lisa because TLC fired her for calling Usman the n-word. It was on the tell all of their season, but they edited it out.

    • @Gibbygirll
      @Gibbygirll 2 года назад

      I came here to mention this, and also Lisa is now married to an American man.

  • @NaNa-ep4kl
    @NaNa-ep4kl 2 года назад +7

    Usman is just doing it for clout hoping to become the next burna boy. If he is so not focused on looks and really want to marry older and bigger then why is everybody in his videos the opposite? There wasn’t anybody for him in Nigeria? He is so shady.

  • @oneof134
    @oneof134 2 года назад +5

    51??? FIFTY ONE?????? No way he's even over 40... what is happening🤯🤯🤯🤯

  • @colourful_dori
    @colourful_dori 2 года назад +6

    My mother met the love of her life at 70

  • @kayladouglas1751
    @kayladouglas1751 2 года назад +3

    My grandma was single for over twenty years after her divorce and meet her now husband at 59 who knows what is in life deck be open

  • @jennifers1040
    @jennifers1040 2 года назад +4

    The reason she's the only one excited about her and Usman is because everyone has seen the show and seen that Usman is using these women.

  • @lavinder11
    @lavinder11 2 года назад +18

    I think people know that it's not literally incest and the data set you mentioned about men in their 50s reaching for the stars with young women suggests that age does matter. But I think that aging out of 'hotness' goes both ways, but it seems that heterosexual men tend to be more vocal about their preference.
    As for her final chance comment, I tell people that my granny found love again at 72 years old, but that doesn't make them feel better lol

  • @neshisquirrel032
    @neshisquirrel032 2 года назад +2

    90 Day disassociated with Lisa and Usman because she was repeatedly calling him the N-word. He was asking the cast if that was normal in America. That’s why it was tight lipped. They also cut that part out of the Tell All but you can still find the deleted clips online I believe.

  • @katherinelangford4524
    @katherinelangford4524 2 года назад +4

    omg i love this new season it's so entertaining

  • @nealiecruz2532
    @nealiecruz2532 2 года назад +1

    Just my opinion as a woman in my 50’s too.
    I believe that instead of chasing a thirty something year old man anywhere, that she should think about making her own happiness in her life. I believe she’s setting herself up for heart ache and she will only have herself to blame. She might consider her future and what that could look like. Maybe join a gym, get into nutrition, take a class, join clubs, and yes, date. Maybe consider dating men closer to her age. It broke my heart for her when Uzman kissed that computer she bought him instead of her. She should learn that she doesn’t have to buy a man expensive gifts to get him to love her.

  • @VG-ul5sq
    @VG-ul5sq 2 года назад +2

    I’m 27 and I feel like I’m never gonna find love

    • @VG-ul5sq
      @VG-ul5sq 2 года назад

      Or rather be loved and like accept it

  • @ashleydraper9769
    @ashleydraper9769 2 года назад +2

    My proposal to you is to have your own show for after the 90 days and do the couples therapy with them. You would be great and we would love to watch it.

  • @alongfellow4147
    @alongfellow4147 Год назад +2

    I wonder if being a predator is Kim being her true self, according to her mother... of course her feelings aren't reciprocated has she seen kim!Kim!? She has a face only a mother can love

  • @jennifers1040
    @jennifers1040 2 года назад +3

    Thanks for giving more anxiety around aging!

  • @IBDjenn88
    @IBDjenn88 2 года назад

    This is one of the few couples I know very little about, so looking forward to this reaction in particular! Also good on your dr!!

  • @KarenSmallwood
    @KarenSmallwood 2 года назад +1

    Dr. Kirk, I am with you on the background music! I wish I wasn’t so sensitive to it.

  • @AskArlene
    @AskArlene 2 года назад +3

    Those of us on Insta knew BGL and Usman were no longer together. She's with someone else. So much drama especially over money.

    • @Junitunes
      @Junitunes 2 года назад

      Yeah but wasn't it Lisa screwing over him?

    • @AskArlene
      @AskArlene 2 года назад

      @@Junitunes yes I think so

  • @victoriabanks7701
    @victoriabanks7701 2 года назад +3

    Her mother’s hair is beautiful

  • @xxxmoexxx1
    @xxxmoexxx1 2 года назад +3

    Ahhhh I want to scream at this lady! When she buys him all that stuff, like come on can you get any more desperate, it’s so sad…..

  • @morjana679
    @morjana679 2 года назад +3

    51??? I thought Dr. Honda was around 38 🤣

  • @revinaque1342
    @revinaque1342 2 года назад +1

    I find it interesting that Kim's friends are also around Usman's age, much younger than her. I wonder if she subconsciously seeks out or prefers the company of younger people.

  • @ellicia230
    @ellicia230 2 года назад

    I haven't been watching the seasons lately, so I'm not sure if this is from a new season or if it's old, but I really like how we're seeing different ways people can have a relationship with someone. I feel like society was ingrained with just one definition of what a romantic relationship should look like, and it's refreshing to see people loving in ways that they want to (as long as no one is being harmed). I feel like we're getting brand new material and concepts for you to comment on!

    • @ellicia230
      @ellicia230 2 года назад

      oooope just go to the part where you're commenting on Kim's sort of desperation to have a relationship with Usman due to the fact that she feels she won't ever be loved by anyone... and my comment may no longer apply lol! I thought this could have possibly been a "healthier" type of dynamic on this show, but alas this may turn out the same as a majority of the other relationships on this show

  • @audreymaria117
    @audreymaria117 2 года назад

    You're referring to Amy Schumer's, "Last F*ckable Day" skit, which was amazing! Love Tina Fey.

  • @dangalanga6941
    @dangalanga6941 2 года назад +4

    How could she go through all that cheating and her being loyal AF only to say she’s ok with being with someone who wants multiple wives…. Plus she has a jealous streak 🤦‍♂️ this one won’t end very well….. fingers crossed tho 🥴

    • @jennifers1040
      @jennifers1040 2 года назад

      Honestly I think because she's really desperate.

    • @emma-kw5js
      @emma-kw5js 2 года назад

      its called consent. getting a second wife w her permission is something completely different than going behind someone who is expecting ur loyaltys back and cheat.

    • @dangalanga6941
      @dangalanga6941 2 года назад

      @@emma-kw5js people with the mindset she has can never be happy with sharing a partner
      Consent has nothing to do with this situation

    • @emma-kw5js
      @emma-kw5js 2 года назад

      @@dangalanga6941 yes it does😂 u cant say that cheating and having sister wives is the same, because its not.
      what u were saying would not only apply to her but to many others too, thats why I simply tell you its abt consent.

  • @fiercely.feminine531
    @fiercely.feminine531 2 года назад +2

    Personally the reason I think I get a little skeeved out by age gap relationships is the idea that if the older person can be interested in someone of their child’s age NOW, then they could’ve easily been interested in someone their child’s age when their child was underage. Hence making any sleepovers, parties, etc that person hosted for their child before feel potentially exploitative in retrospect.

  • @shannonframpton8777
    @shannonframpton8777 2 года назад +1

    Is that a strokes album in the background? Has Dr.Kirk answered this in a mailbag episode?

  • @trekstarsam2494
    @trekstarsam2494 2 года назад

    Hi Dr. Honda. If I'm not mistaken, Usman and Lisa were only married in Nigeria, their marriage was not legal in the USA. Usman probably just got the marriage annulled in Nigeria. If I remember correctly, they had a big fight as Lisa I believe was supposed to send Usman money for appearing on 90 Day Fiance, and he never received, allegedly, what they agreed on. There was a huge blow up with her calling him the "N" word on camera. Once 90 Day Fiance's producers got wind of this, they completely and rightfully cut ties with her. If you watch closely, there were no flashback scenes of Lisa on any of Usman's segments, while when Darcey was on 90 day fiance with Tom there were several flashbacks of when she was with Jesse, since Jesse is still with the 90 day franchise.

  • @joywebster2678
    @joywebster2678 2 года назад +12

    My guess... not gonna go well. Poor lady. It is unfair to think at 55 you are selected on dating by 80yr olds because the 60 yr Olds are hitting up the 40 yr olds. Age doesn't matter but at a certain point you run into severe functional differences like who can walk, who can't so the differences become very apparent. Wish women didn't become invisible with menopause.

  • @nineteenfortyeight6762
    @nineteenfortyeight6762 2 года назад +1

    Kim ordered Michael Jackson from Wish.

  • @secretpal6039
    @secretpal6039 2 года назад +2

    She sounds desperate and willing to lower her standards and agree to anything to make the relationship work.

  • @ms-fh8ed
    @ms-fh8ed 2 года назад +1

    I think what her mum said is really interesting, because from what i have seen so far, i really liked kim in the first episode when she is still in america, but as soon as she got to tanzania (sorry if i spelt that wrong) she did come across really desperate for usman's attention, with all the gifts and the jealousy...🤔 like she was trying to buy usman's love

  • @silverfish8059
    @silverfish8059 2 года назад +2

    Oh, dear sweet dr Honda….. Usman wants a green card to pursue his career in the states….. it’s a grift. Poor woman.

  • @jaimekuehner7363
    @jaimekuehner7363 2 года назад

    Amazing analysis Dr. Honda!

  • @abeautifulcountry9353
    @abeautifulcountry9353 2 года назад

    I think with Kim and Usman it isn't just the age gap - everything is unequal. He is younger, but also far more attractive than her in terms of looks but also the way he dresses and presents himself. He has social currency with lots of friends and connections - in large part due to his music and career. He is also immensely driven. Kim doesn't have any of these things. She appears to be a woman with a fairly simple life, living and taking care of her mother, and has a few close friends. I can almost feel the hidden contempt from Usman towards her, as if he is disgusted at the thought of them being physically intimate. But at the same time, he seems to like her and feel sorry for her. This is doomed to fail on all levels.

  • @ellahinkle6418
    @ellahinkle6418 2 года назад +13

    I think part of why there's not much talk or obsession with Kenny and Armando's age difference because they are two men in a relationship with one another and I think maybe why people don't find it weird is because we don't commonly hear of cases of older men exploiting younger men in an relationship and being creepy with them. I think one of the big reasons a lot people are weirded out by large age gaps is because of pedophilia. Older men and women preying upon and sexualizing young girls and boys. So I think that kind of shapes how people view large age gaps and people have decided that large age gaps are disgusting and dangerous because of pedophilia or something.

    • @lavinder11
      @lavinder11 2 года назад +12

      There was a lot of talk against the age gap for Kenny and Armando, but Kenny takes great care of himself and doesn't seem to be exploiting Armando, so that talk died down.

    • @ellahinkle6418
      @ellahinkle6418 2 года назад +2

      @@lavinder11 Oh. Thank you for informing me. I missed that discussion.

    • @koobie83
      @koobie83 2 года назад +3

      The stigma against women past their fertile years exists in all society stratum - work, relationships, etc etc. Older women who have gone through menopause are always made to feel worthless.

  • @meatlocks
    @meatlocks 2 года назад +4

    My dad is in his late 70s and just met a woman his same age in his senior's home. He said there are a couple of other "budding romances" going on there. The straight men are at an advantage because of the gender ratio there, but romance can happen at any age.

  • @anna_kou
    @anna_kou 2 года назад

    I had to go find that Tina Fey skit :D

  • @nathen6017
    @nathen6017 2 года назад

    The skit is Last F*ckable Day on the Amy Schumer show, Patricia Arquette was in it as well. I love all your pop culture references, keep them coming!

  • @Ariarosesmommy
    @Ariarosesmommy 2 года назад +2

    I would love to see the Good Doctor react to Sister Wives

  • @rlentnot
    @rlentnot 2 года назад

    Men with age preference: sexism.
    Women with height preference: preference.

  • @CC12398
    @CC12398 Год назад

    Sometimes I feel like therapists are big enablers LOL

  • @lorip9600
    @lorip9600 2 года назад +2

    It is my firm belief that women past a certain age have a much harder time finding true love because men in their 50's 60's etc want a much younger woman in many cases. These older men are nearly always hitting on younger babes. Let's get real here. Younger women are attracted to older men because they believe that these older men have their fiances in order and/or are rich (although not in all cases, of course). The older men's egos are stroked because they have a sweet young thing. They are not interested in older women, plain and simple. I have witnessed this scenario over and over. I also believe that, as men age, they get better looking. Not the case with women. Finally, it seems to me that younger men hook up with older women for ulterior motives. There are plenty of gorgeous women in Nigeria but Usman wants to use American women to get to the U.S. so that he can further his music career. I may be wrong but it seems very likely to me.

  • @katsuramatsumoto5320
    @katsuramatsumoto5320 2 года назад +1

    It's is exhausting faking it 24-7. Sooner or later, the real you will slip out, so you might as well be real from the beginning.

  • @EMC1986Hobi
    @EMC1986Hobi 2 года назад +1

    This is embarrassing. She fell in love with someone over tv. They are not together.

  • @Herbsaiyan
    @Herbsaiyan 2 года назад

    The only thing I question is when she described her past relationship she was hurt by her ex husband having other relationships but she doesn’t mind Usman having more than one wife? Hmmm

  • @amadeus3339
    @amadeus3339 2 года назад +1

    Wtf, Dr. Honda is 51...I thought he was like late 30's or early 40's hahaha.

  • @krisg7259
    @krisg7259 2 года назад +6

    I really like Kim. Can’t stand Usman.

  • @Boobalopbop
    @Boobalopbop 2 года назад

    That skit is actually from Amy Schumer’s show and it’s brilliant. It’s about actresses everyone once considered hot, and they turn 50 and they’re being sent off to die or something because they’ve reached their hot peak and now they have to disappear. Was great social commentary.

  • @teamcougars
    @teamcougars 2 года назад +1

    My issue with so many couples on this show is the desperation, generation and cultural differences generation differences are the huge issue with many of the couples who have big age differences or so it seems 🤷🏼‍♀️

  • @pn4640
    @pn4640 2 года назад

    Kim is Usman super fan. I think she is imagining herself with MJ (God rest his soul in peace)

  • @morganwilson8717
    @morganwilson8717 2 года назад +1

    I'm 50+ but get mistaken for a girl 😆 🤣 😂 I've been with my guy for 22 years. We have a 18 years age difference. What bother me earlier in our relationship was not just the age but that he's white from an established family and I didn't want to be judged,.I don't think it's just about age but how you cared for yourself....

  • @lulu7074
    @lulu7074 2 года назад +8

    This lady should find a man near her town.

    • @pinkpugginz
      @pinkpugginz 2 года назад +1

      . She deserves a man around her own age in her own town

  • @adlinfigueroa6679
    @adlinfigueroa6679 2 года назад +1

    I don't like her she is too desperate. I'm in my 40s and I sometimes think I have no chance of love again but I will never try to force a man to love me no matter how late in life I'm for the love game.

  • @beekay9607
    @beekay9607 2 года назад +1

    Dr. Honda is 51?! I thought he was in his late 30’s to early 40’s.

    • @lalixlili
      @lalixlili 2 года назад +1

      Asian genetics and a healthy lifestyle.

  • @Peanut_taco_muffin
    @Peanut_taco_muffin 2 года назад

    I totally disagree that women over 50 are thought of as “disgusting” and that it’s very difficult to find dates at that age. I have family members and coworkers over 50 that are constantly getting hit on and getting dates. Plenty of men like dating women their own age,

  • @bettedavismydears1521
    @bettedavismydears1521 2 года назад +4

    Get ready to watch a car crash

  • @ninatellier9995
    @ninatellier9995 2 года назад

    does anyone know why on the show they never mention Lisa and how Usman has been on the show before?

  • @biznessgoose
    @biznessgoose 2 года назад

    I see that strokes record, doc. 🤘

  • @sarahsierra730
    @sarahsierra730 2 года назад

    Love your videos 👏👏

  • @annie3040
    @annie3040 2 года назад

    Saying some men find older women "disgusting" was the only trigger word Dr....