Ah, the Math Professor critically acclaimed to be a Cockologist the likes of which history has never seen before. Cockulations of such tremendous proportions are only capable of being solved by someone of his caliber
Every single Cockulation is a magnum opus of careful and precise numerical values to create an effortless result, one of which that is unrivaled by all mathematicians and cockologists alike throughout the world, one could even argue quite literally the cosmos itself.
haven’t really watched any of his videos in a while... what changed? I know about the old stuff from the Chanel and obviously know about my boi Eugene and his crayon eating a$$ lol... Just not the new stuff so idk what changed
@@jameskocks4734 Meat Miles = M x C squared Where m is for meat measured in meters C is the constant for the speed of strokes per earth seconds under the special relativity theorem
516,000 ft / 1,063 ft (height of Eiffel Tower) = 485.42 Eiffel Towers. To put it into more perspective it’s more than the distance between New York City and Philadelphia.
Giannis Antentokounmpo Meat Size Calculation 6 foot 11” 25% Greek (avg 6.18 inches) 75% Nigerian (avg 7.23 inches) Median of Greek 1/4(6.18) and Nigerian 3/4(7.23) = 6.97 inches Black (x1.05 multiplier) = 7.32 inches NBA Player (x1.5 multiplier) = 10.98 inches (round up to 11) 1 inch margin of error both sides 10
as a math professor at the University of Florida College of Cockoligy, i hereby confirm that the calculations in this video are 100% correct and accurate to the best of the field
There is no traction on those tires. They are permanently smooth, and you can't find her walls, no matter if you have a bunker buster or a baby carrot. You would LITERALLY get more pleasure screwing a hole in a wall. Don't @ me.
@@user-rl6wr2ny7f Absolutely not. We were too naive, worrying about the 1,000 diq stare. This chick pioneered levels of debauchery we dismissed as ghost stories. The sad thing is, there's a woman out there right now plotting to beat her record.
Amount of entries are quite high at 1.5. That means for every two sessions, one will come back for another try. I believe in order to verify this validity of this return customer amount, we need to see what she looked like at the beginning of her career and rate her out of a 1-10 or 1-100 (more accurate) every year of her 20 year career to provide a more accurate repeat session rate. Also, we need for find out her average cost per session and if she ever lowered her prices (as she should) as she got older. Along with other variables. I conclude that this study needs further analysis to come to a more accurate conclusion. This is a great trial run though. Further research required….
@@nofriendsnofoodnowifekpopi2165 then simply dont use it lol people in the U.S dont care about the metric system or who uses it,its seems other countries are so invested in what the U.S does when the U.S does not care
Obsessed with career - "ok so less time with me and also less time for you to take care of your beauty? No thanks." Obsessed with fame/clout - "so you constantly desire the attention of others besides me? No thanks." Have money - "Don't care - women get resentful when they have to spend money on a man, regardless of how much they have. No thanks." Am funny - "Don't care - I have friends and comedians for that." Am smart - "Don't care - I don't want to debate intellectual topics when I get home. I want domestic comfort and peace. I have to be intellectual all day at work." Am strong/independent - "Then live by yourself. I want a person who is comfortable leaning on someone else when they want to. This isn't a business transaction." What we do care about? Beauty, willingness to help and care for you (maternal instinct), agreeableness, youth (because beauty), sex. End of story.
For my Europeans out there thats 157 km. The average adult walks a kilometer in about 12 minutes which mean that it would more than AN ENTIRE DAY of walking to get from base to tip
Realistically, between all of birdmans subscribers, we could conduct a large scale study to definitely prove the average amount of strokes. That way we could ensure that we are using the most accurate and up to date cockology information.
OK so as an amateur cockologist, I've done some research online. Looks like the science puts the average "rate of thumping" at 0.8 "thumps" per second. Together with a study done on the length of an "encounter", the median time sits at 5.4 minutes. All together, that's 259.2 "thumps" per encounter (259 or 260 if we round), on average. So in fact, Birdman's calculations come up 5.2 times short. All in all, looks like the final cockulation should come out at 508.196 miles.
Weve heard of the eyes being windows to the soul, but she also has doors, those big double ones. The cockulation was impressive, birdman should be a professor teaching cockulus.
This was spooky for sure. Bro birdman doing the math legit reminds me of being back in the dorm with the homies, trying to do simple math, drunk as hell, at a late hour, while munching on fastfood.
i think the average guy lasts more than 50 strokes. if you’re pumping, you’re going several strokes a second which means they’re lasting less than a minute and going slow
The math is wrong, if you factor in repeat clients the number used to find the output of meat would be below 1 not above. So the output in this research is skewed by above 30%
forgot to multiply the average entry to the amount of strokes because 1.5 is average not 1. 50 x 1.5 = 75. then do 75 x 16,000 = 1,200,000 strokes. 1,200,000 x 5.16 = 6,192,000. multiply 6,192,000 by 1.5 you get 9,288,000. divide by 12 you get 774,000. divide by 5280 and you end up with 146.59 miles of meat
This woman took more strokes than shots ever attempted by the NBA's leading buket getter, Kareem.
Bro that’s a hell of a stat 💀
thats fucking crazy😭😭😭
Bro, she has as many bodies as the arenas during most NBA games.
@Joshua Payne Wilt is 7th though.
I thought Kobe took the most shots
Instead of just miles of meat we should also start calculating gallons of nut collected cause this shit is crazy
Surprisingly it's only 4 gallons
😂😂
probably enough to completely populate mars
@@Chris-nj1vv no way you just said *ONLY* 4 gallons of pure nut 🗿
It’s too much of a variable, everyone nuts different amounts
I think this is gonna feel like a classic.
Nah we need those Eugene vids
Let me catch my son saying this is gonna be a classic when he didn’t finish the video
@@Lordfakekick frrr
A Certified Hood Classic
Facts
Make her the new Arby's official mascot😂😂😂
💀💀💀😂
She's a lesbian now
5 guys or Arby’s
She’s got the meats
I work there n we’d probably make her the manager instantly
Let me catch my daughter setting the world record for miles of meat
🤣🤣
it’s gonna get wicked
I won't have a daughter anymore
U might accidentally be one of them
@@upyourasteriod4494 ayo what
Ah, the Math Professor critically acclaimed to be a Cockologist the likes of which history has never seen before. Cockulations of such tremendous proportions are only capable of being solved by someone of his caliber
Yh the cockologist put in some work today, to show us his vast and ever expanding knowledge of cockology.
Every single Cockulation is a magnum opus of careful and precise numerical values to create an effortless result, one of which that is unrivaled by all mathematicians and cockologists alike throughout the world, one could even argue quite literally the cosmos itself.
Can there have an cumulations in litres...?👓😶
Bird man a W cockologist
Masterfully articulated
These titles are brining back hope that old Birdman is coming back.
Now we just need a Eugene video, and "females living on recruit difficulty."
Please a eugene video
Fr man what happened to my guy. What the hell happened to the stapler bandit video??
real OGs remember when Simps were called eugenes.
haven’t really watched any of his videos in a while... what changed?
I know about the old stuff from the Chanel and obviously know about my boi Eugene and his crayon eating a$$ lol... Just not the new stuff so idk what changed
YT and its PC culture got to our man Birdman, he can't be as abrasive as before, it's truly a loss for us all
Girls be like: “That was just a phase, now I’m ready to settle down.”
😬
Gross...
And some poor soul will
That's some roasted Charcoal roast ham in between her legs
In the full article it says she has a wife lmao.
@@7joster only took her 16000 men to realize she has a thing for women
This is actually a certified hood classic
Hah, you beat the bot.
I swear I've been seeing that phrase all day by different users. 😏
@@Arc-Tempo21 which one? 🤔
Last dude to hit that has offically claimed the biggest L ever in human history
Like a pencil thrown down a hallway
Like a twig down the Grand Canyon
It would be an L is he wifed her up
Like A rock in a desert
@@vash_the_stampede6570 damn thats wide
Albert Einstein himself would be impressed with your meat calculations birdman
e=mc2 meat!
🤣
@@jameskocks4734 Meat Miles = M x C squared
Where m is for meat measured in meters
C is the constant for the speed of strokes per earth seconds under the special relativity theorem
ppl will still say she’s just doing her and there’s nothing wrong with it
She just doing everybody wtf you talking about lol
Well it was her Job, and she has been coming out on tiktok telling people not to do what she did and how prostitution is bad.
Technically there's still nothing wrong with it lmao
We'd be fine if she was just doing her...it's the fact she has had more people inside her than a Midsized Town.
@@adityashandilya2789 …….
The Grand Canyon comparison killed me
I was hoping he’d do like a skyscraper or like a landmark like Eiffel Tower
@@looinrims 97 miles is way longer than the height of any building or mountain
@@gmeyer_7 exactly
516,000 ft / 1,063 ft (height of Eiffel Tower) = 485.42 Eiffel Towers.
To put it into more perspective it’s more than the distance between New York City and Philadelphia.
@@kmjoker6518 bru god damn😂 u deffo got a PhD in cockology
Brings a whole new meaning to “ she’s got some miles on her.” Lol
😂
that one's got over 120km on her, full on oldtimer rustbucket POS
97 miles is more than 1hour drive at 70mph
@@timeflowEqualquin look out we got a genius over here
Literally over a mile.
There's 5,280 ft in 1 mile
For reference, that length is roughly 35264 Toyota Corolla or 2069 Boeing 747 or 412 Empire State Building stacks on top of each other.
Birdman is not accounting for the fact that not every stroke is balls deep
If you ain't balls deep you ain't doing it right.
Well 50 strokes is definitely under-pitching it so it balances out
@@ftniceberg874 hahahahahahahahaaaaaahhhhh !!! !! !
Giannis Antentokounmpo Meat Size Calculation
6 foot 11”
25% Greek (avg 6.18 inches)
75% Nigerian (avg 7.23 inches)
Median of Greek 1/4(6.18) and Nigerian 3/4(7.23) = 6.97 inches
Black (x1.05 multiplier) = 7.32 inches
NBA Player (x1.5 multiplier) = 10.98 inches (round up to 11)
1 inch margin of error both sides 10
😂💀
Giamnis is full Nigerian he moved to greece from Nigeria when he was young
Isn't Giannis' heritage fully Nigerian, I don't think he has any Greek genetics in him, so he would be the full 7.23? Correct me if I'm wrong though.
this man is the meat measurer
😂
Damn she played 12 minutes every quarter for all 82 games.
💀💀💀 And they were all blowouts
@@animelytical8354 She was getting blown out that’s fs
@@animelytical8354 + the post season
and always did the 4 points play
She the REAL Iron man, AC Green ain't got nothing on her 😂😂😂
as a math professor at the University of Florida College of Cockoligy, i hereby confirm that the calculations in this video are 100% correct and accurate to the best of the field
This how teachers come up with “if John buys 16,000 watermelons” theories…this is the game
This is why we learn math at school
nah just use the cocklator
Lmfaoo
hahahaha shit cracked me up
This video is fuckin prime birdman. Literally gold
Was finishing my PhD in cockology but birdman uploaded
Is that what females refer to as, “Living my best life?”
good perspective tool, delaware is 96 miles long
she took one delaware of meat and then some
Birdman the scholar. Now I know you got a good education the way you showed your work, top marks 💯
We need to add a girth measurement into the calculations to see just how wide it is as well as long
Yes. We need to know the square miles of meat
Man this class is great. No tests, no homework, and we get lessons every once in a while, but we learn something new each time.
We need this to become an official series with a website and leaderboard and everything
It's fuckin hilarious how serious he is about this. He considers all variables in the equation
There is no traction on those tires. They are permanently smooth, and you can't find her walls, no matter if you have a bunker buster or a baby carrot.
You would LITERALLY get more pleasure screwing a hole in a wall.
Don't @ me.
@@user-rl6wr2ny7f 10,000%. I don't think her body knows how to get wet anymore, especially since I KNOW she has a year-round yeast infection.
@@user-rl6wr2ny7f Absolutely not. We were too naive, worrying about the 1,000 diq stare. This chick pioneered levels of debauchery we dismissed as ghost stories.
The sad thing is, there's a woman out there right now plotting to beat her record.
Even beyond that her pair bonding to ever have a relationship even her current one is totally FUBAR.
This specimen needs to be captured for full examination and further study.
Amount of entries are quite high at 1.5. That means for every two sessions, one will come back for another try. I believe in order to verify this validity of this return customer amount, we need to see what she looked like at the beginning of her career and rate her out of a 1-10 or 1-100 (more accurate) every year of her 20 year career to provide a more accurate repeat session rate. Also, we need for find out her average cost per session and if she ever lowered her prices (as she should) as she got older. Along with other variables.
I conclude that this study needs further analysis to come to a more accurate conclusion. This is a great trial run though. Further research required….
That's 171952 yards.... almost twice as many yards as Tom Brady has in his career as QB
We need some math done for miles dealt out by Genghis Khan
You need to be saving these lecture notes, Birdman. We need to refer to these calculations in the future.
miles of meat-(MoM), the newest addition to the metric system
why would it be metric lol miles is Imperial
@@jevislife5675 True, I guess OP didnt notice
@@jevislife5675 that’s why it’s the newest addition
@@jevislife5675 the imparial system is garbage
@@nofriendsnofoodnowifekpopi2165 then simply dont use it lol people in the U.S dont care about the metric system or who uses it,its seems other countries are so invested in what the U.S does when the U.S does not care
Let’s go boys! Let me add 3 inches to those miles
reily reid be like: “finally a worthy opponent our battle would be legendary”
😂😂😂😂😂 In front of a 16000 man devourer Riley Reid is a saint
Obsessed with career - "ok so less time with me and also less time for you to take care of your beauty? No thanks."
Obsessed with fame/clout - "so you constantly desire the attention of others besides me? No thanks."
Have money - "Don't care - women get resentful when they have to spend money on a man, regardless of how much they have. No thanks."
Am funny - "Don't care - I have friends and comedians for that."
Am smart - "Don't care - I don't want to debate intellectual topics when I get home. I want domestic comfort and peace. I have to be intellectual all day at work."
Am strong/independent - "Then live by yourself. I want a person who is comfortable leaning on someone else when they want to. This isn't a business transaction."
What we do care about? Beauty, willingness to help and care for you (maternal instinct), agreeableness, youth (because beauty), sex. End of story.
for another reference, with that amount of meat she could climb mount Everest about 18 times.
The US border is 100miles if you needed a comparison
Mount Everest is about 5.5 miles high, just thought I'd leave that here for another reference
Einstein been real quiet since this video dropped just sayin
For my Europeans out there thats 157 km. The average adult walks a kilometer in about 12 minutes which mean that it would more than AN ENTIRE DAY of walking to get from base to tip
Bruh
Imagine the ocean of white.
This man said “this is a one and done” and i keeled over 😂😂😂
If math was taught like this in schools, we'd have more scholars.
Realistically, between all of birdmans subscribers, we could conduct a large scale study to definitely prove the average amount of strokes. That way we could ensure that we are using the most accurate and up to date cockology information.
She's on a glizzy marathon
I’ve been waiting SO LONG for another miles of meat calculation by birdman 🤣🤣 the miles of meat calculations keep me rolling
Man's out here doing the Lord's work.
"That year i got 97.7 miles of meat. Which actually kinda pissed me off cause it was just short of 100"
- The wolf of Ball Street
You gotta multiply the end result by 2 cause the meat goes in and it goes out so it's double the strokes
OK so as an amateur cockologist, I've done some research online. Looks like the science puts the average "rate of thumping" at 0.8 "thumps" per second. Together with a study done on the length of an "encounter", the median time sits at 5.4 minutes. All together, that's 259.2 "thumps" per encounter (259 or 260 if we round), on average. So in fact, Birdman's calculations come up 5.2 times short. All in all, looks like the final cockulation should come out at 508.196 miles.
have my upvote. this is the research we need.
Watching Birdman while I'm eating a fat steak with a side of chicken. Mounds of meat, my friends.
Best Math class I've ever been a part of
The 50 stroke figure is incredibly conservative or I'm overestimating most men. With a good pace you could do 50 in about a minute.
Thanks for the mathematical session which has taught me on how to analyze critically and integrally the way human anatomy works.
Great use of Significant Figures throughout the calculations, clearly a man of culture.
Weve heard of the eyes being windows to the soul, but she also has doors, those big double ones.
The cockulation was impressive, birdman should be a professor teaching cockulus.
This is a certified hood classic
Oh
Was finishing my PhD in cockology but birdman uploaded
My ex could be a contestant
i feel u
I agree I was her 1437 meat and I was not impressed with what I saw but I had to see it through
Birdman needs to start calculating girth so we can know the amount of miles in width they take too
She’s got more one and dones then John calipari and coach K combined
Birdman really making a “Cockologist” a profession
Birdman at it again. I love how you broke out the calculator 🤣😂🤣
This was spooky for sure.
Bro birdman doing the math legit reminds me of being back in the dorm with the homies, trying to do simple math, drunk as hell, at a late hour, while munching on fastfood.
It's like he's calling out Dragonball Z power levels!!!
This one's level is above 10,000 😳🤣😂
😂😂😂
This is going to be one to look back on
Liberal arts, ❌
Law school ❌
Medicine,❌
Nuclear physics❌
Cockology ✔️✅
She has more body count than my kills in COD for my favorite gun.
And Maths was never this interesting
I love how 700 in less than a half hour knows it's good content 👍
Average stroke time is 50 strokes a minute. If her sessions last between 5 to 15 minutes. Strokes would be 250 to 750 a customer
Could have put it on a map of some well known country or location to put it into perspective
So she can go from New York to Philadelphia and have 3.4 miles left😂😂
Certified hood classic already
For more spacial reference, there are 5,280 ft in 1 mile.
She had 1 and a quarter of a mile of meat.
That is probably the most math you've ever done
i think the average guy lasts more than 50 strokes. if you’re pumping, you’re going several strokes a second which means they’re lasting less than a minute and going slow
Her walls lookin like Dresden, Germany after WW2
This woman’s back has seen more shots than any nba rim
I dropped my girl off to a Halloween party and just got back, then I got this notification🙏🙏
😬
“Ok… this is already getting kind of crazy”
💀💀💀
She definitely had the MEATS
The new Arby's spokeswoman is wilding out here
I think I was waiting on this from the time I saw Dyfo cover it. I didn't know I was, but now that I'm seeing it, it feels like I was.
Let me catch my son calculating meat
The fact that she hooks makes this perfectly believable.
Sorry but at this point your just chucking hotdogs down a corridor..
They should put this math In school for life skills purpose of course
Let me catch my daughter having more mileage than a 2001 Toyota Corolla
The math is wrong, if you factor in repeat clients the number used to find the output of meat would be below 1 not above. So the output in this research is skewed by above 30%
Damn that's crazy 🤯 what's her @ im tryna become 16,001😭
Lmk how many std’s u get bro
Thank you for doing the math and justifying it in your head out loud. That was the best part of this entire video
Einstein has been real quite since this video dropped…just saying.
forgot to multiply the average entry to the amount of strokes because 1.5 is average not 1. 50 x 1.5 = 75. then do 75 x 16,000 = 1,200,000 strokes. 1,200,000 x 5.16 = 6,192,000. multiply 6,192,000 by 1.5 you get 9,288,000. divide by 12 you get 774,000. divide by 5280 and you end up with 146.59 miles of meat
Those are athlete levels of miles done
Florida to Cuba is 90 miles for reference
Please Stay Single and Safe Fellas … 🙏🏿
You know it's mad science when you find yourself focusing on this more than studies.
Instantly stopped watching SCP Content to watch this.
Edit: What the actual fuck.
What channel?
@@victore8342 The Exploring Series
@@_Nohan_ nice. Im a fan of TheVolgun and SCP Explained