It is sooooo important and appreciated that you spoke on POC and how easily POC including children that have disabilities or have diagnosed mental illness can be and have been mistreated and misunderstood based on their out behaviors, sometimes fatally so.
Yah, I’m always afraid around cops which makes me want to calm down by self soothing but I’m afraid that will draw more attention to me so I just end up getting upset over it and have to go calm down. So I just avoid them completely, same goes with people who make me uncomfortable. Sometimes people just give me bad vibes. I don’t leave my house much but if I did I’m guessing I’d probably get the cops called on me every now and then because of how I act. I don’t have autism as far as I’m aware but I have ADHD and tics as well as social anxiety and depression so I’ve really leaned into stimming to replace old bad coping mechanisms.
Ver true, when I’m at work and out at public it is sooo hard not to stim. I try not to in public because people will ask me questions and I get really uncomfortable. I carry a fidget cube everywhere I go. As soon as I get home I stim non stop with my tangles and fidget cube.
As a neurotypical person I used to feel uncomfortable and weirded out when I saw Autistic people stimming in public because that's how society taught me to act, but after watching videos from you and Fathering Autism my eyes have been opened into this whole other world and now I find myself just uncontrollably smiling from ear to ear seeing other people (neurotypical or non-neurotypical) stim because I just know that they're soothing themselves and now I have found it to be vicariously self-soothing. You are a beautiful person Paige and you inspire me :)
Please don't give Fathering Autism any credit, that channel should be avoided. They are exploiting their autistic daughter and speaking over actually autistic people. Just some things to be aware of.
@@justcallmejessz3712 never heard of Dad Challenge Podcast, so no. I'm autistic myself. The autistic community overwhelmingly disapproves of the Fathering Autism channel because yes it is exploitive and awful.
I witnessed my daughter stimming in the backseat of my car after I picked her up from day camp last week and it was the first time I knew what was happening in that moment. I silently waited for her until she seemed to be done and then we had a nice conversation about how her day went. These videos have helped me so much to understand her beautiful little mind and what she needs to flourish, because it's firsthand and I appreciate everything you're doing so much!
Hats off. I've only heard negative things when stimming. "Stop it", people getting embarrassed and so on. You're doing a very nice thing for a person who needs it.
Reading this comment made me tear up because my younger brother (now 21) is autistic and my parents really did not handle it well. I’m sure they have no idea what stimming is. I didn’t know until recently. My parents would tell him to stop making noises or playing with his hands and would sometimes yell and hit him. He would cry and say he couldn’t stop doing it, but all they wanted was for him to fit in. Thank you for continuing to educate yourself.
Is no one going to talk about how good her singing is???I literally came back to this video just to hear her singing.Also,I found out that certain comforting stims where you touch yourself(like stroking your chin when you're confused,crossing your arms when you're mad) are basically like mimicking the touch of another human being.Which is a really interesting fact(BTW,I only read 1 thing about it so I might be wrong,correct me if I am,I usually get my information from multiple sources and not just one but I wanted to share it anyway)
Man, there are certain *feels* of certain songs that are interesting and I want to repeat them. I never thought of this as stimming. I like low notes that are still in my range, and I like held-out notes, and certain sequences of sound; sometimes when I'm singing a song in a different way I'll stop and repeat a phrase that's different from the original but feels neat to my head. I'll repeat it several times in a row, even.
Yes! The low notes. Sometimes I'll just hum a low note to soothe myself. Never thought of it as stimming before. Or I'll often sing songs in much lower keys or just go an octave lower.
I have to say, as a neurotypical, when I was very young (five, six-ish years old), there was an autistic man in my neighborhood who lived with his parents. They would walk around the block. He would often yell as a stim. The noise scared me at first, as any loud vocalizing would. My parents explained, probably not entirely knowing what “stims” are, that some people just make sounds and that is totally okay. Even today, I, at 18 years old, never think twice when I see the family walk around the block.
Omg same my neighbor had a disability (not sure what it was? I think it was autism? I don’t remember because I was like 4) and they would flap their hands constantly and I was scared of them but I feel bad about it now because it’s just stimming and it’s ok
Same in my neighborhood. He would walk around the block and occasionally yell but he would also spin around every few feet. Never really make me scared because he was always smiling lol
Well yelling should not be encouraged, there are Stims that are not as good. It's bad behavior and badly affects others. Like it did you. They should find other ways to stim or self soothe. It's not like any stim is appropriate, pulling down your pants and masturbating in public wouldn't be even though alone at home it may be a good stim but we should respect and be considerate of others and yelling, masturbating and other activities are upsetting for others
My 4 year old daughter flaps her hands like crazy when she’s happy, and it’s so incredibly precious and it’s how we know she is feeling excited or happy when she can’t tell us with her words. I really enjoy your videos because a lot of your personality reminds me of my daughter.
@@ScribblyNL that’s why we call our son a wee flapper haha, to me when he stims it’s a way of communicating how he’s feeling so I would never try to stop it, except when he bangs his head and pulls his hair
I do this too and I'm 18. I get way overexcited and I start to flap my hands and my boyfriend sometimes just causes this stim to happen. Lol. I get overexcited when he and I talk and I start flapping my hands and I make tiny yipping noises.
I've "beaten" autism tests so many times I was sure I didn't have it so now when I finally got the diagnose I'm starting to understand and see all of these things I've been carrying with me and go like "HOLY SHIT, THAT WAS AN AUTISM THING!?"
I totally understand omg! The best part is when you have the self compassion towards yourself to realize that like autism isn’t something that needs to be “beaten” we are just the way we are and it’s absolutely okay!
I’ve never had tests for autism but I definitely gotten a diagnosis before that I didn’t think the issues I had were out of the normal but after having a diagnosis I thought oh wait being sensory overloaded by balloons popping and being close or far from fireworks was autistic things!!
Saaaaaaame, I talked myself out of every question on those tests because my coping mechanisms and masking were so ingrained that they didn't "fit".... but when hearing about the thought process behind it... oh shit, that wasn't normal? 🤣
As a father of an autistic kid I love these videos, my kid is nonverbal, so It's amazing to hear from somebody that faces similar challenges what they really mean. Great content and great voice! Thanks for sharing with us your point of view of stim!
@@BestFriendsWhoLiveTogether this sucks, autism has a lot of challenges by itself, parents should try their best to not be an extra and unnecessary issue. Hope that your father could accept better how you are
@@BestFriendsWhoLiveTogethermy moma too was not approving of stimming and said to put that thing away. I felt she did the right thing. Soon enough I realized that I don't want this for myself and let my body be depended on some twisting object and I made a decision to put my stimming object under a pillow and refused to touch it. Eventually it went away. I still try to regulate this if any stimming occurs. Be mindful of it. I feel more confident in my body and think more clearly when I overcome such things and pay attention and let my body be fine without that and find other soothing activities to focus on. I did the same with smoking, it's another stim and can become very addicted to it. One day decide to stop to stim and smoke and the next day no more
I know it's not the point but you have an incredible voice. Edit: Ps this is coming from a singer who is extremely judgemental of people's voices lol. But that tone is beautiful and perfectly on pitch. Also great shape to the notes.
I wouldn’t be surprised if she has people in the music industry begin reaching out to her. I too came in from the other room to watch and listen, and I almost never stop what I’m doing to actually watch what I’m listening to. Her voice legitimately calmed me.
I was a HUGE happy flapper as a kid, but I quickly became embarrassed by the looks I would receive and taught myself to immediately stop if I caught myself doing it. I still flap to a lesser degree and I’m trying to be kinder to myself about it. I can’t describe the joy that welled up in me seeing you stim so freely. Thank you Paige 💕
Same thing here!! Watching this video made me realize that I repress my stims even when I'm by myself, which is stupid. The judmental voice of society got inside of my mind, time to expel It
Oh have the same experience.. I did wierd repetitive movements with hands, mouth and feet .. but while growing up I realized it was wierd like people but more family getting pissed and wierded out.. so now i stop myself whenever I feel the urge to stim.. sometimes I still do that with my hands and mouth when noone looks never realized it could be stimms..
@@devonmunn5728 interesting i might do that when I feel like I touched something dirty I don't really pick up heavy thing I show watch to see if I do it
No lie, you are the person that made me feel comfortable with my stims. I used to hide them so much, people would ask me what I was doing and I would pretend that they didn’t see me stim. That was my life. I feel so much more confident in my own body since I stoped suppressing them
I can relate. I always get this flash of primal fear if someone walks in on me stimming and immediately just pretend I wasn't. As if I'd been doing something I wasn't supposed to.
My stimming tends to make people super f*ckin uncomfortable. I can't stand most textures, and when I'm on the phone I have to have some kind of oral stim during(relatable to smokers) and will walk in small circles hundreds of times if no one checks me on it. Sorry for the comments just writing as I listen! And you have a BEAUTIFUL singing voice
YO ANOTHER CIRCLE WALKER!!! I tend to do so as like a calming mechanism and it feels super relaxing in general doing loops and figure 8s- not just if on the phone, but I feel a little less alone now!!
Oh I wonder if the "walking while on the phone" thing is another like common neurotypical stim. Also the "bye bye bye bye bye " at the end of calls for some reason.
When I flapped my hands to stim as a kid, my grandmother would tell me "don't do that, you look autistic". I find it regretful that she would try to shame me for being myself. She judges everyone from a glance. In my experience, the only people who care about what people think of them, are those who also judge other people for irrelevant things. Edit: I don't agree with my previous sentence; I don't think everyone who cares about what others think of them also judge people. A lot of you in the comments changed my mind about this, and I'm really sorry for ever making this assumption. I can understand the anxiety that comes with strangers staring at you. I'm trans, and gender dysphoria is a constant worry when I go out. I always wonder if people can notice that something is "off" with me. It was kind of hypocritical of me to talk like I don't also care about what others think of me. Again, sorry for making any of you feel uncomfortable!
I've actually had a Karen point me out to her daughter in the park and warn her to "keep away from people like that." She certainly wouldn't have made that observation about Paige, even if Paige were stimming.
that's horrible, I'm sorry bout that :(. I have to disagree though, I don't think that people who care about what people think of them are those who judge people from irrelevant things. Or they probably do for some extent, but I think that the people that care the most about what people think about them don't judge people for irrelevant things. If you're thinking about yourself all the time you don't have much time thinking about others, except for what they think of you. Personally I struggle to be in my own house because of my neighbours, if they see me, what they think of me etc, (i've actually heard them talk ill of me which didnt make things better) The stress and fear of what people think of me stays with me all the time, and I do not judge people for irrelevant things. But not everyone works like me, perphaps everyone is as judgeful as it feels :(
I'm so happy that you've talked about how stimming is not reserved for autistic or neurodivergent persons. As a neurotypical, I stim a lot, and it has always made me uncomfortable in social situation, because I feel like people are going to judge me for doing something you wouldn't expect in such or such setting. As a child, I wouldn't really care nor realise this, but growing up, having friends being embarrassed over me doing things in public really created some kind of Pavlovian response and I started restricting myself more and more. I hope that one day, everyone can just do what they want when they want, as long as it doesn't hurt anyone else. PS: Singing is also something I love very much, I literally can't spend a day without doing so! I'm happy to see I'm not alone :)
As a person with both touretts and autism, singing is a huge stim for me. There are Moments I don’t realize I’m doing it, and my mom stops me ‘cause it’s “ embarrassing out in public.” I really appreciate someone normalizing stimming in public. 😊😊
I masked for so long in public and still find myself masking for my safety but if I’m just minding my business and feel confident I will sing, skip, hop, bounce, and fiddle with a sensory object in public and I make a point to smile at anyone that looks at me like I’m odd. Y’all are the odd ones just aimlessly walking in a store with no life added.
i dont mind at all. it really depends on how im stimming. if its vocally it doesn't normally, but some stims can trigger my tics. fx. high pitched stims trigger me. but most of the time it physical stims that trigger my tics. hope that helps 😊 never be afraid to ask questions♥ have a great day @@ariellegrace7635
I disagree. Who said she was masking in this video? Your statement is pretty loaded. Before I start explaining why, let me just tell you I’m not offended. I like finding the truth, and this seemed like a good challenge for me to do so. You say the mask comes off when she starts stimming. What does that mean? Does that mean that she is always holding back the urge to stim? Or that the only real thing about her is how she acts when stimming? I can’t go any further without you responding. But hopefully this could be the first step to finding the truth.
as an autistic POC I have to say you are darn right about it being "dangerous" to stim for people like me. It makes people feel uneasy more than "white" people stimming in public for some unknown reason. Just wondering if you have witnessed this in real life or is it from something you heard or read?
It's the systemic racism. People have learned to consider unusual actions from POC as "suspicious" behavior and fear it. Then with the way cops treat people, yelling orders without explanation and expecting respect and immediate obedience, well, you can see how many autistic POC would get screwed
@@casebeth wtf kind of comment is that. Some cant help the way they do things its not something that can be controlled. My son is almost 3 and i cant control how he stims wether other people think its weird or distracting or not. So should he just not go to preschool because you dont want to be distracted by someone who does something differently than you because youre neurotypical and they are not? Pretty selfish dont you think.
@@casebeth why? to please people like you who are rude think that everything needs to be accommodated to them? “itS diStrActInG” Get over it. Any and everything can be distracting.
@@ambergreenwell9009 no because schools and the workplace should be as comfortable as possible for as many as possible. The majority shouldn't have to put up with constant distraction and irritating behavior
@@casebeth If schools and workplace should be as comfortable as possible for as many as possible what about the kid you’re forcing to be uncomfortable by not allowing them to stim? If you think *forcing* a child to sit still and do nothing when they can’t or when it makes them feel uneasy is a good thing, then you have a lot to learn. Amber Greenwell makes a good point, anything and everything can be a possible distraction for somebody. If a child stims a lot and can’t control it why should they be the one to stop?
My daughter is almost 3 & she has stimmed in a very particular way since she was about 8 months old. When she sees something new, feels the wind on her face, gets tired, sees something that makes her incredibly happy her entire body tensed up, her mouth opens (almost like a surprised look) & her hands open and shut next to her face. I’ve had people ask “what is she doing…?” And I simply tell them “she is feeling and seeing the world in ways that most can’t & its her way of expressing that through her body” I LOVE when my daughter stims. I encourage it. She is it OT & Speech right now. ABA was suggested and when I did my research and saw that stimming was one of those things seen as a “negative, interrupting behavior” I bawled my eyes out. There was no way in hell someone was going to change that about my girl. She is beautiful and amazing and I’d have it no other way. Thank you so much for explaining stimming from an autism standpoint. It helped me understand a lot more why my daughter stims & I appreciate it so much.
I was stopped from stimming ALL MY LIFE, sometimes with medication, sometimes with yelling. In school I was punished constantly. Now I'm learning to do it again and, frankly, watching you is really helping. Also it does feel very good, but I am still slightly scared to do it
After learning about stims, it seems like there are popular neurotypical versions: Visual stims for neurotypicals - when they check out satisfying compilations, like someone fitting a puzzle piece perfectly or making a perfect ice cream cone spiral, or hand drawing a perfectly round-looking circle, etc. Auditory stims for neurotypicals - when they check out ASMR compilations, like listening to someone type keys on a keyboard, click a pen repeatedly, crinkle plastic wrapping, etc. Anyone else agree, or am I wrong about this?
i had developed so much shame when it comes to stimming especially those stims that really made me stand out. seeing you now and seeing other autistics on the internet in general has helped me immensely. my body even remembered some of the stims i used to do in childhood!!!! best source of happiness
Some support: The crisis lines are on google. Maybe search up the instructions to. The instructions for Canada (686868), just text the word text or Text or TEXT I'm not sure which one. They are also on Quora (the phone numbers) if you search up something bad mental health related. They show up at the top.
i recently talked to my mom about possibly being autistic and when I brought up stimming she was like "no you don't stim stimming is more visible and dangerous" and it was so invalidating... I'm 20 years old and i stim in ways that aren't that visible or are more acceptable in public.. it's more visible/"weird movements" when im alone. hearing my mom completely deny me when i was trying to open up to her was super hurtful. if you're a friend or family member of someone with autism, or even someone who thinks they might have autism, don't act like you know them more than they know themselves.. there are always things you don't know about them. they could act completely different when they aren't masking..
My mom is the exact same way. Shuts down everything I say unless it can be used against me. I opened up to her about my depression and suicidal thoughts and she said “no you’re fine, you don’t seem depressed at all. Depressed people don’t shower or get out of bed” and then a week later my room was messy and she said “your messy room is why you’re depressed, you need to clean it now or I’m cancelling your flight to visit your sister” keep in mind I’m 21 years old and living at home while I go to college.
@@gracerideshorses7309 i hope u get better and get your life out of this enviroment. I had depression and once things get better i was soooooo thankful i manage to survive that. You're future self is waiting for you 😊😊
I have just been diagnosed with Autism at 24 years old. I don't stim in the more obvious sense, also only at home when Im alone or with my partner, but I've never been someone who hand flaps or anything obvious. However, I am still autistic! I also wonder sometimes if I suppressed my natural stims, because I was brought up being scolded for any odd or socially unacceptable movements (I also have chronic tic disorder so would get scolded a lot for tics as a child) My mom, although trying her best, still says the most hurtful ableist things to me without even realizing it. She doesn't realize shes being offensive. So I feel you
I work as a TA with 3-5 year olds and used to really try and hide my stimming but actually the kids really feed off the energy when I stim while talking about an exciting topic and I’ve had kids that wouldn’t usually engage with lessons be engaged when I’m teaching because they see how exciting I find it.
watching you stim makes me really wonder what I would be if I didnt mangle my mind with masking. And I am really happy and greatful for your generation. I do sing, hum, whistle, etc. but you know. it annoys people.
Yep, it annoys people... And i am annoyed by people being annoyed because of such a stupid reason :/ i am not harming anyone by singing/humming and i am not bad at singing either, so, i am just like "let me breath please"...
@@LurpakSpreadableButter Just because your Neuro typical doesn’t mean you have the right to tell neurodivergent people they can’t sim just because it annoys you it’s how they feel the best and can be the best them they can be
And such big congrats on your home! I'm glad you mentioned how police react to these behaviors. A close friend of mine at the time was deaf and had tourettes, and police threw him on the ground and put a BAG OVER HIS HEAD because he couldn't hear them say "put your hands up!" Granted he was being approached bc of his violent behavior but regardless to me it was extremely wrong to do to a person with these conditions.
Wtf?!! I swear fuck the police tbh they really just abuse their power and use it as an opportunity to literally ABUSE people and get away with it bc of that power 🥴🥴. Disgusting. I hope your friend got a decent lawyer and pressed charges on the use of putting a bag over his head!
Yeah... They said he was trying to bite them. Which I would consider self defense under these circumstances. He wanted to sue but didn't because he had other legal shit going on, luckily they dropped it so he didn't have to pay to be assaulted. Unluckily it's not like they apologize or correct their sick behavior. I totally agree basic signing should be mandatory to learn. He literally talks like he's deaf(you know what I mean, his voice isn't quite a normal tone and he mispronounces some things and his volume fluctuates) and they still acted that way. He kept saying "what? I don't have my hearing aid." And they attacked.
Lol I was helping my dad with a DIY thing and he needed a little bottle of glue shaken up because it was old so he handed it to me and I started stimming. Did the job pretty well!
I hope the way I say this comes across correctly. As someone who works in special education it makes me so hopeful to see you understanding your stimming, and being an advocate for it. I work closely with OT to provide effective stims for my students and when they find something that provides them that relief they need it is so life changing. Thank you for being an advocate and educating those around you. You’re truly amazing Paige.
I think stimming is common with any neurological disorder. My teen daughter has had stimming behaviours since she was a baby. She is not on the autistic spectrum, but she does have ADD and anxiety, and she especially stims when she is anxious or stressed. What she does is rock her upper body back and forth. When she was a baby, she did it in her crib. Now she does it when she is alone and listening to music on her headphones. I think the music relaxes her. She also uses the music as a way to disguise her stimming. If you walk in on her while she is rocking, she will claim that she is just moving to the music (but mom knows better😉).
Also, yes! That’s exactly how I feel when I have the urge to stim, like a build up, then a release of endorphins when you let it happen. When you suppress it, it makes the build up more uncomfortable. Like a mosquito bite that’s really itchy, but not allowed to touch it. The urge will eventually go away, but it isn’t pleasant.
Yes like smoking, that's what happens. But like smoking (which is just another stim) various stims can also be overcome and regulated out of respect for others or yourself
I'm neurotypical but my leg shakes, particularly when tired. A doctor told me it was Restless Leg Syndrome so it's different from a stim but has a similar releasing effect. I can stop it but it makes the urge to do it worse. My family, who I live with, grab my leg to try and stop it from shaking. It has no negative effect on them and I need to do it, but they still try and force me to stop. I hope the world becomes more accepting of stimming or 'abnormal' behaviour.
That sounds so frustrating. I hope they learn to respect your boundaries and to not just reach out and stop your body doing something natural for it. ♡
My partner has restless leg, he didn’t think he was on the spectrum until we realised he probably had ADD, we find weighted blankets help a lot with restless legs.
I’ve self diagnosed with restless legs but I’ve been looking more into potential neurodivergent conditions. My legs are always moving and I have stimulation toys I use all the time that are really helpful for me
I will say, I sometimes get anxious if I see someone shaking their leg a lot (I have GAD), so it might be bothering them? However, if they know about your condition, they definitely shouldn't be forcing you to stop.
@@jogold867 That one's tough, especially when both parties have a diagnosis (whatever the diagnosis may be). My sister sometimes bounces her leg, and while it generally isn't a problem, if I can feel it (either through the floor, the table if we're at a table, whatever we're sitting on (like a bench), or something like that), if it's in my line of vision and I can't block it out, or if it's making a sound (such as shoes squeaking or scuffing on the floor), it drives me absolutely insane because it's sensory overload that I can't escape - even though I know what is causing her to do it, that knowledge makes no difference in how my brain reacts to it. But if I can't feel, see, or hear it myself, I don't care. It comes down to a conflict of accommodations, so to speak, and that can be tricky to resolve.
I think it would be better to compare tics to sneezing, and stims to coughing, because although you can't really control a sneeze you can control a cough if you want to. So yeah I guess, just wanted to throw that out there
Sorry for being nitpicky but I get tics and I can control my sneezes a lot of the time. The best phrasing I've heard for a tic is comparing it to a computer glitch, but maybe its different for other people.
I had meds that gave me tics and there's still one that's persisting now that I'm off, but to me they feel like a shiver. it tickles you till u HAVE to move. I can suppress it, but then it's just gonna come back later as a bigger "shiver".
Wait, you can control coughs? How? That’s an honest question, because I can’t stop any of my coughs; but I can stop most of my sneezes... this comment made me feel so alien now. 😳
I had no idea that singing could be a stim! I’m trying to educate myself on stiming as a neurotipical person, so this was a great video for me! Sometimes I’ll wake up and be like “aah I need to sing a certain note!” Just cause it feels nice idk, so maybe that’s a stim! Great video, I love learning more
You sing extremely well and when you were doing 'Hallelujah' I got 4 chills/stims from it. Beautiful. Perhaps this may help. I read a science fiction short story about a boy who had to 'unwind' himself to feel more 'normal'. As he grew older he learned to save his unwinding until the end of the day when he could do what turns/twists/spins he needed in private. As the story ended it was revealed that he was born in orbit and his unwinding was to realign himself with a particular planet and the unwinding was as if a cord or string were connecting him to that planet and has to be untwisted from time to time. Maybe stimming is a reaction to a build up of some unseen tension from an unknown source (or no source at all) that needs to be released in the only way you have found to do that. I find myself turning around 'the other way' when I feel a tension build up. I also have the 'Jimmy leg' as described by Kramer from Seinfeld TV show.
Before I was told by my therapist that she thinks I have autism and everything that I did started to click into place. Whenever I’m in social situations I leave and go to the bathroom or something and I flap my hands and arms (stimming) and I used to think I was weird for doing things that are deemed ‘childish’ and ‘weird’. But know that I know this about myself, I feel way more at ease with myself. And have started to let myself stim more. I still mask a lot in public but every now and then I will let my self stim for a while, kinda like what you did in this video, and I don’t feel ashamed of myself. Thank you sm for your account you’ve helped me a lot.
I'm an autistic teen (rn on my little sisters account) and I also have anxiety which causes me to fidget/stim even harder and when I'm having an anxiety attack I move my legs back and forth really fast. Most people get confused and weirded out even though I don't even stim half as much around people so I'm glad that people like you are teaching others about this:)
I used to have anxiety about school homework. I would kick my feet against a brace under our big living room table. The worse I felt, the faster and harder I kicked. I ended up breaking the brace completely off the legs of table! Mom told me tho, that I only finished what my older siblings started.
I like singing as a stim! I can sing for hours and hours! Im glad you talked about neurodivergent poc and the dangers of stimming in public! Also I am an age regressor so alot of my toys, pacis, and teethers help out when I'm feeling stimmy. I'm in the process of getting a diagnosis for autism and its been pretty stressful so I have been feeling very stimmy lately. Seeing other people stim also makes want to stim. I hope one day I'll be confident and safe enough to stim in public.
this made me feel way better about behaviours I’ve always tried to suppress because it’s not considered normal (I’m an adult woman in my early 20s and in process of getting diagnosed atm), and it’s so nice to understand and see someone else try to describe the feeling of stimming, cos it’s kind of indescribable
Thank you SO much Paige for bringing awareness to poc stimming vs Caucasian individuals & how police view them are completely different. This is so important as my daughter is 5, black & autistic. Stimming should be more normalized as a whole 💜
This is the first video of yours Ive watched and just wanted to say *thank you* for talking about the differences that a person of color may face in society. And how it is different from them. It is important. So. Thank you.
My almost 3 yr old stims by yelling when she's excited, side to side sway, chewing, smelling or caressing her face or fingers with her blankie, making certain sounds over & over. I love it all 🖤🥰
Oh my god the blankie thing. I’ve never ever heard of anyone else doing this. I’ll be 21 and I still do it with my childhood blankie. Thank you for commenting this ❤️
Now I know I’ve had lots of stims my whole life, but I didn’t initially think I did. Then I learned my nonstop singing was a vocal and auditory stim and that opened me up to learning more and accepting that this was a huge part of me. Lovely voice, it’s always so wonderful to hear from another sing-stimmer!
You said accepting a part of you. Some support (I also have another reply): The crisis lines are on google. Maybe search up the instructions to. The instructions for Canada (686868), just text the word text or Text or TEXT I'm not sure which one. They are also on Quora (the phone numbers) if you search up something bad mental health related. They show up at the top.
Same, until I joined a discord for adhd and autism I didn't realize how often I stim. I sing all the time, bite my nails, and braid pieces of my hair and didn't really consider those stims until a few people told me, also I have some more obvious stims that I do sometimes but really only in private or under extreme stress because I've always been scared of people thinking I'm weird (not that anyone I've grown up with has ever really thought I was normal, though I didn't realize all the reasons people bullied me were related to symptoms of adhd and autism until now and those things that I thought I had to change about myself because they were what was wrong with me wasn't me improving my social skills, it was just me masking my symptoms for a prolonged amount of time so people would finally leave me alone about it)
The way you compared stimming to masturbation was brilliant. You are so entertaining to watch and this was so informative. I realised recently that I like to stim and have recently referred myself to my local autism screening service as I am not diagnosed and believe I may be on the autism spectrum. Keep doing what you do and keep being you!! Thank you
Masturbating indeed can be a great stim, when alone. But some stims are not okay in public such as pulling your pants down and masturbating or yelling or other disruption behaviors
You are just so self aware and do the work that EVERYONE should do. I think your self-work on emotion regulation-and your channel in general- are such an incredible service to the world. I have two sons, ages 17 and 7. The oldest was believed to have ADHD growing up, but didn’t respond to meds, and was later diagnosed as having OCD. My youngest son was diagnosed with Tourette’s over the summer, but has not yet displayed OCD or ADHD behaviors. Your videos are such a great resource for me as I work to try to embrace my sons and meet them where they are, and hopefully be able to help them when they need me to advocate for them. I believe it is MY JOB to learn how they learn best and adapt to them, rather than expect them to succeed in a world that isn’t suited for them.
13:40 and I am crying over how much I felt through her voice. This was an amazing video, all the insight and information was on point and suddenly beautiful acapella singing to then finish it up on further information, this was a powerful video.
I love how you help people to relate to you even if they are neurotypical. I find educating my classmates about how I work and some of my friends work is done most efficiently when I help them see similarities between us and them, to eliminate that segregation of thought and understand we are all just people and function like people, so, in understanding that, we can understand each other.
Thank you for your video. It's been super enlightening! I just got diagnosed with autism and adhd on Aug 20, 2021. I had no idea that I was stimming my entire life. Repeating what others say, repeatedly opening my mouth, flicking my thumb up and down my fingertips, popping bubblewrap, rubbing my cat's super soft fluffy belly for hours at a time, rubbing my hand in fleece blankets, singing deeply so it vibrates my whole body. I'm sure there are others that I just don't realize.
I've had complicated feelings towards my brother for most of my life. He were my best friend when we were little but I also often felt annoyed, disgusted, irritated etc around him. He used to flap his hands and I used to think that was dumb. After learning about stimming, I realized he's flapping his hands when he's really excited about something. Now it's become my soft spot, I still have a lot of negative feelings towards him (which is not his fault but they are a result of my diagnoses and how I see others) but I find the hand flapping so precious and something about him that really doesn't annoy me or irritate me in any way, as I all of a sudden UNDERSTAND it! Understanding things is everything!
I wish my family could be as understanding as you are :( all of my behaviors were seen as "strange" or some other negative adjectives were applied to it. I should mention that I went undiagnosed, but it still felt terrible growing up that I wasn't allowed to do those things
I just have to say when you sang hallelujah I got tears in my eyes, you sing so beautifully. Also, thank you for all of your videos. You help so many people understand others and their selfs so much better, nd and nt alike. Also, you are just truly amazing in every way.
I chew a lot, ever since I was a kid. I have permanent scars on my fingers from chewing too much. Pens, pencils, barbie feet... When I learned about chewlery, I had to buy a ton... You can just LOOK at things and know they'll feel great on your teeth (or behind your molars. Love that.)
That craft foam that comes in sheets, ugh I love that texture... Stuff that has a good rubbery squish like barbie legs and those good pens with the rubbery grips. Yes. I used to keep strep throat when I was younger b/c I would chew on EVERYTHING. If I was holding something it was subconsciously in my mouth. I've managed to mostly contain the habit by becoming a leg shaker and a hand fidgeter.
I also chew a lot, as a child my parents gave me rubber tubing to chew on, or I would chew on my bedpost ( made of wood, of not child safe paint ) or stuffed animals.
GIRL!!! O-M-G-G!! I just got hired to work in a special needs class. We have 6 students...at least 5 have Autism, all different levels. You have helped me tremendously!! Some of our students touch themselves, but not as a sexual gratification thing. I recognized it as stimming as the students were not "completing the task", so to speak :) Your video is an absolute eye opener and I am going to share it with my co-workers
I sing, too. I, too, sing, a lot. You've a great singing voice, too. Wish we could sing together on stage while playing piano or guitar. Anyway, ... I also bought a huge, round, soft, blue pillow that is severely soft to use in stimming. Another is a fidget spinner and a toy that clicks as you bend the mechanical pieces to force the toy into a different shape.
I love that you have the confidence to be authentically you. There are so many things I'd love to do like the stimming here in your video but I just feel society wouldn't accept it. I'm white myself but I loved you acknowledge how much more difficult it is for POC as well.
AH! BANGS! CUTIE! Edit: Vocal stims are great for me, I love how certain words or songs feel. I also love to make geometric shapes drawing in the air with my hands or feet etc. Just feels right.
Folks: We've got words on racist discrimination, we've got pansexual pride, we've got words on self-pleasure, and as always, we've got terms and experiences related to autism. And an invitation to everyone to stim?! I rate this video based :D
Hi, yes, it's a compliment! I don't actually know where calling things based comes from, but it means something like, "This is very cool and good and I support it"@@darlinqtoni
@@huntermorgan4201 oh ok good! Haha I am a suspecting audhd person so I don’t understand my generations slang and words😂😂😂😂😂they just pop out of nowhere plus I don’t follow mainstream pop culture stuff anyways hahahah
No worries. I'm also neurodivergent (still figuring out which flavor/s), but I often feel like I sit just between the two ways of navigating the world. Like I can run on either set of tracks, or like I'm an interpreter for people who speak two different languages@@darlinqtoni
@@huntermorgan4201same usually those are the audhd people cuz the two sorta balance em out performance wise and all the neurotypicals are like yes your normal and then you get closer and they are like oh no you are different hahahah
Oh my, your singing voice is just so soothing. I just feel so relaxed after listening to it( I was having a peculiar morning emotionally for some reason). If you ever make a album/cd/whatever that had you singing, I would DEFINITELY buy it
The more I research about autism in girls the more I think that I might be autistic but at the same time I know that it is bad to self diagnose and I’m scared that I’m making it all up in my mind and I don’t really wanna tell my parents that I think this cuz I think they will just brush it off
Hey, if you want a diagnoses i fully understand that. That being said. If you are or are not autistic, you are you and every part of you is okey. I had wondered myself if I might be autistic, verry possebly have a form of adhd mayby possebly have tourets. But then for me atleast I came to the conclusion it might to not know beceause I am a peace with who I am and what I do that seem like symthoms of these things. I know I am comfortabel. So that is what I wisch for you. To be comfortebel with your self no matter what you diside. Good luck❤
I've got a full-body stim that's incredibly obvious to anyone around me. I learned early on not to do it, and to my parents and everyone, I grew out of it. But even at 23, I'll sometimes try to seclude myself and stim for a few seconds. At home alone, if something interesting (not necessarily good or bad) happens, I'll just start doing that stim for minutes at a time, not really able to stop myself until I've worn myself out. For most of my life, I had no idea why the heck I did that. I have *never* heard of someone doing the same thing. Only recently did I realize it's a stim and may be connected to some undiagnosed Autism.
There is also something called psychogenic non-epileptic seizure disorder that can happen to people with trauma or PTSD and can include their whole bodies. Might want to check that out.
I have always felt the urge to rock back and forth when I sit on the floor. It’s a been a thing since early elementary but I remember being told not to do it or else I’d be labeled as “retarded”. I definitely suppressed a harmless stim that would have made me feel better all because of ableism
This video is the one that introduced me to your channel and I am glad it was this one. As a 34 year old male with autism it is very difficult to even exist with the constant criticism or demoralizing comments. Your videos are amazing and you really are doing something amazing here on RUclips. Thank you!
Hey! I'm a neurotypical girl who has really enjoyed your channel so far. While I do not have autism, I find that I can really relate to some points that you talk about. I was very smart in school, but didn't have many friends and struggled to relate to others. I shared your interest in being right, and I didn't understand why other people wouldn't want to find the absolute truth. Every time I start to learn a new subject, I get completely overwhelmed with questions and understanding how much I don't know. I've also got some hypersensitivity to senses like being driven wild by any tiny thing touching my face, or getting headaches from the sound of a fan. I love that I'm able to find things in common with you, because it is so much easier to understand and be empathetic to a person or group of people if you can relate to them. I also love how you talk about how you solve the problems you have, such as setting up your space in a way that reduces the number of steps to get a task done, and how you talked about stimming. I often make clicking noises with my mouth when I need to focus, and shuffle a deck of cards when I'm feeling anxious. You've helped me to understand why I do those things, and that those actions are useful for me to regulate my emotions, and I'm leaning into it! This has provided great insight into how I can accommodate autistic people when I interact with them. Thank you for helping me to understand autism more, and also helping me grow! You're so articulate, well educated, and approachable, you're doing a great job of raising awareness!
@3:19 Yes! RESPECT for you bringing awareness that people of color are more likely to be arrested/judged even harsher and etc... just for having autism. 💯👍🙌🙌🙌
Thankyou for giving a timestamp of when the video actually starts. Was never a big fan of vloggerisms where the person would ramble about what's going on in their lives for a few minutes before actually starting to explain the point of their video.
I suspect that I have low support autism and I’m currently dealing with emotional suppression. I feel I’ve learned to stim in sneaky ways to be socially acceptable. Hearing you describe stimming is giving me the courage to keep going to get back in touch with myself. Thank you for sharing
I'm a neurotypical and this was so interesting. Thank you for sharing! As a neurotypical I stim with bouncing my leg but also this video made me realize I stim by singing too. Sometimes when I'm somewhere public, I really want to sing or hum and it makes me feel really uncomfortable not to do it. I also can't focus if it's silent, like if I'm trying to draw or play a game I need to have some noise that I can control going on in the background like an audiobook or a tv-show. Depending on what I'm doing. If there is no noise I get uncomfortable and can't focus.
Was literally swaying and rocking as I watched this which is definitely one of my sims 😆 You have a beautiful singing voice to, I'm glad it brings you joy.
I never thought about how POC could be so negatively perceived for displaying traits of neurodivergence or disability! Thank you for mentioning that, it's definitely opened my eyes
Ive never been diagnosed with autism or anything but I have always bounced my leg and bite my nails. I used to think it was out of boredom but it always makes me feel SO good while I do it. I also have to have something playing in the background. I even sleep with fans, music, audiobooks, and/or podcasts. I’m not sure if making loud noises count as stimming because when I’m stressed I’ll make an annoying noises and it makes me feel better. It weirds my coworkers out so I try not to at work but that’s where I feel the need to. I never knew that others do things like this!!
You said stressed. Some support: The crisis lines are on google. Maybe search up the instructions to. The instructions for Canada (686868), just text the word text or Text or TEXT I'm not sure which one. They are also on Quora (the phone numbers) if you search up something bad mental health related. They show up at the top.
As a person with sensory processing disorder, I stim non stop. I’m so thankful for people bringing acceptance to stimming and educating others on the topic!
You're just so sweet, and genuine, and adorable 🥰 Thank you for shedding so much light on this topic and just being you!! You make it easier to be myself too. Can't say thank you enough for being authentic for us all to see ❤️
Seeing you so happy when stimming so lovely to see, I really don't get why some people have such an issue with stimming and people being happy, just seeing people happy that way brightens my day
I've had to suppress my stimming as my parents absolutely hate it (my mum especially). I used to flap my arms and hands a lot but my mum largely got me to stop by yelling at me whenever I did it because it was "a bad habbit". One of the hardest things to control is leg shaking, which I do almost constantly and get yelled at for doing. Around the house, I cover myself in a fluffy blanket, something my parents aren't happy with but accept (even though they constantly make fun of me for it). If I make an odd sound, they get angry with me because "it's what people with severe mental illnesses do"; I also have headphones in most of the time, often listening to music but still listening to everything around me which is another thing I get yelled at for because "I'm not listening" because apparently, nobody can focus on more than one thing at a time.
I do a lot of stimming too and my family (mostly my mom) yells at me to stop even when I'm at home. She gets very embarrassed which is rather annoying.
Stumbled across your channel today accidentally. Thank you for these videos, they are helping me understand my sons autism far more than any health professional has. Also hearing you sing Hallelujah just broke me it was truly beautiful. 🐺❤
Thanks for enlightening me why I like singing so much I recently got diagnosed with ASD and now it makes sense that singing is a good auditory stim as well as the vocalising itself
Paige I’m allistic but I find your videos to be the most helpful I’ve seen on YT so far for understanding my autistic friends :) I thought it was really interesting hearing that everyone stims. The most intense desire to stim & intense gratification from stimming I’ve experienced has been while tripping on mushrooms. That may sound weird, but it feels the most relatable to the autistic stim experience you described. Making random vocalizations, touching certain textures for an extended period of time, rolling around on the ground, closely watching something, etc all feel borderline orgasmic with how satisfying they are 😅 it’s like an intense joy explosion. Just thought I’d share! Curious if any other neurotypical people feel similarly :)
This video was so validating for me ❤️ I have ADHD and I’ve always felt weird or like I was an attention seeker when I stimmed or had tics, but seeing Paige being entirely herself made me feel safe
I think my biggest stims are -Shaking my leg when im stressed -Literally chewing a pack of gum a day -When i’m listening to music, i have to be dancing or moving my arms. Sometimes it looks like im directing a choir but more stiff. I love the way i feel music -Playing with fidget toys especially ones i can squish I really appreciated this video, and i’m hoping to get more comfortable stimming in public
I don't go through a pack of gum a day, but I will chew the same piece of gum for literally like 8-12 hours and it really helps when I'm in a situation where I'm not able to stim in other ways, primarily school, and I also love music as an auditory stim. I didn't realize until a few months ago that other people listen to music as a stim but since I was little I've always loved to walk or bike to the park close to my house and swing and listen to music for literal hours when I'm overstimulated or understimulated.
Just discovered your channel, and I wanted to say I love how genuine you are. You're not afraid to show your true colors and that makes people like me appreciate themselves a little more perhaps. You're a beautiful person!
Will you make a video about the process of moving and how being autistic effects that process? I recently moved as well and during that time many of my friends and family members saw my ‘autistic side’ fully for the first time because I couldn’t mask anymore
It is sooooo important and appreciated that you spoke on POC and how easily POC including children that have disabilities or have diagnosed mental illness can be and have been mistreated and misunderstood based on their out behaviors, sometimes fatally so.
Yah, I’m always afraid around cops which makes me want to calm down by self soothing but I’m afraid that will draw more attention to me so I just end up getting upset over it and have to go calm down. So I just avoid them completely, same goes with people who make me uncomfortable. Sometimes people just give me bad vibes. I don’t leave my house much but if I did I’m guessing I’d probably get the cops called on me every now and then because of how I act. I don’t have autism as far as I’m aware but I have ADHD and tics as well as social anxiety and depression so I’ve really leaned into stimming to replace old bad coping mechanisms.
Ver true, when I’m at work and out at public it is sooo hard not to stim. I try not to in public because people will ask me questions and I get really uncomfortable. I carry a fidget cube everywhere I go. As soon as I get home I stim non stop with my tangles and fidget cube.
Yes!
Ty for saying this
can we stop referring to people as POC, we are all just people.
As a neurotypical person I used to feel uncomfortable and weirded out when I saw Autistic people stimming in public because that's how society taught me to act, but after watching videos from you and Fathering Autism my eyes have been opened into this whole other world and now I find myself just uncontrollably smiling from ear to ear seeing other people (neurotypical or non-neurotypical) stim because I just know that they're soothing themselves and now I have found it to be vicariously self-soothing. You are a beautiful person Paige and you inspire me :)
She is beautiful 🤩.
@@JakeGuitarMusic inside and out
Please don't give Fathering Autism any credit, that channel should be avoided. They are exploiting their autistic daughter and speaking over actually autistic people. Just some things to be aware of.
She don't inspire me
@@justcallmejessz3712 never heard of Dad Challenge Podcast, so no.
I'm autistic myself. The autistic community overwhelmingly disapproves of the Fathering Autism channel because yes it is exploitive and awful.
I witnessed my daughter stimming in the backseat of my car after I picked her up from day camp last week and it was the first time I knew what was happening in that moment. I silently waited for her until she seemed to be done and then we had a nice conversation about how her day went. These videos have helped me so much to understand her beautiful little mind and what she needs to flourish, because it's firsthand and I appreciate everything you're doing so much!
You sound like a wonderful mother :) your daughter will flourish with your attitude towards asd
You are doing a great job. Learn as much as you can so you can be the safe person and safe place for her.
Hats off. I've only heard negative things when stimming. "Stop it", people getting embarrassed and so on. You're doing a very nice thing for a person who needs it.
@@jessicacruit5770 that's a horrible thing to say about your own child lol, hope youre trolling
Reading this comment made me tear up because my younger brother (now 21) is autistic and my parents really did not handle it well. I’m sure they have no idea what stimming is. I didn’t know until recently. My parents would tell him to stop making noises or playing with his hands and would sometimes yell and hit him. He would cry and say he couldn’t stop doing it, but all they wanted was for him to fit in. Thank you for continuing to educate yourself.
Is no one going to talk about how good her singing is???I literally came back to this video just to hear her singing.Also,I found out that certain comforting stims where you touch yourself(like stroking your chin when you're confused,crossing your arms when you're mad) are basically like mimicking the touch of another human being.Which is a really interesting fact(BTW,I only read 1 thing about it so I might be wrong,correct me if I am,I usually get my information from multiple sources and not just one but I wanted to share it anyway)
Man, there are certain *feels* of certain songs that are interesting and I want to repeat them. I never thought of this as stimming. I like low notes that are still in my range, and I like held-out notes, and certain sequences of sound; sometimes when I'm singing a song in a different way I'll stop and repeat a phrase that's different from the original but feels neat to my head. I'll repeat it several times in a row, even.
Same! It helps me focus
Yes! The low notes. Sometimes I'll just hum a low note to soothe myself. Never thought of it as stimming before. Or I'll often sing songs in much lower keys or just go an octave lower.
Omg this!! I made an entire playlist of “itching my scratchies” bc some songs HIT just right!
I used to repeat everything I heard but people made fun of me for it so I stopped in always just thought that it was a memory thing
You sound just like me!
I have to say, as a neurotypical, when I was very young (five, six-ish years old), there was an autistic man in my neighborhood who lived with his parents. They would walk around the block. He would often yell as a stim. The noise scared me at first, as any loud vocalizing would. My parents explained, probably not entirely knowing what “stims” are, that some people just make sounds and that is totally okay. Even today, I, at 18 years old, never think twice when I see the family walk around the block.
Your parents sound wonderful
Omg same my neighbor had a disability (not sure what it was? I think it was autism? I don’t remember because I was like 4) and they would flap their hands constantly and I was scared of them but I feel bad about it now because it’s just stimming and it’s ok
Same in my neighborhood. He would walk around the block and occasionally yell but he would also spin around every few feet. Never really make me scared because he was always smiling lol
Well yelling should not be encouraged, there are Stims that are not as good. It's bad behavior and badly affects others. Like it did you. They should find other ways to stim or self soothe. It's not like any stim is appropriate, pulling down your pants and masturbating in public wouldn't be even though alone at home it may be a good stim but we should respect and be considerate of others and yelling, masturbating and other activities are upsetting for others
My 4 year old daughter flaps her hands like crazy when she’s happy, and it’s so incredibly precious and it’s how we know she is feeling excited or happy when she can’t tell us with her words. I really enjoy your videos because a lot of your personality reminds me of my daughter.
My son does the exact same thing and has done since he was a baby❤️
It is actually called "flapping" when autism related
@@ScribblyNL we call it her “happy flapping” :)
@@ScribblyNL that’s why we call our son a wee flapper haha, to me when he stims it’s a way of communicating how he’s feeling so I would never try to stop it, except when he bangs his head and pulls his hair
I do this too and I'm 18. I get way overexcited and I start to flap my hands and my boyfriend sometimes just causes this stim to happen. Lol. I get overexcited when he and I talk and I start flapping my hands and I make tiny yipping noises.
I’ve never realised that singing could be a stim. I sometime feel the urge to sing. But I just thought it was just because you know?
same!
Same, I have been utilizing this urge as both a therapy and skill building 💜 I'm thankful for this video
Randomly singing scales is one of my favorite stims!
Same! Now I think that I use it as a stim 80% of the time (besides just loving singing and practicing it)
Same and same with just listening to music. I also thought it was just because yk
I've "beaten" autism tests so many times I was sure I didn't have it so now when I finally got the diagnose I'm starting to understand and see all of these things I've been carrying with me and go like "HOLY SHIT, THAT WAS AN AUTISM THING!?"
I totally understand omg! The best part is when you have the self compassion towards yourself to realize that like autism isn’t something that needs to be “beaten” we are just the way we are and it’s absolutely okay!
DUDE SAME WITH MY ADHD, LIKE SO SO SO MUCH OF HOW I ACT/INTERACT IS BECAUSE OF ADHD
I’ve never had tests for autism but I definitely gotten a diagnosis before that I didn’t think the issues I had were out of the normal but after having a diagnosis I thought oh wait being sensory overloaded by balloons popping and being close or far from fireworks was autistic things!!
@@Onesadboi420 Same with my adhd as well haha
Saaaaaaame, I talked myself out of every question on those tests because my coping mechanisms and masking were so ingrained that they didn't "fit".... but when hearing about the thought process behind it... oh shit, that wasn't normal? 🤣
As a father of an autistic kid I love these videos, my kid is nonverbal, so It's amazing to hear from somebody that faces similar challenges what they really mean. Great content and great voice! Thanks for sharing with us your point of view of stim!
I wish my dad was as supportive as you seem to be! He forbade me from stimming in public because my autism embarrassed him
@@BestFriendsWhoLiveTogether this sucks, autism has a lot of challenges by itself, parents should try their best to not be an extra and unnecessary issue. Hope that your father could accept better how you are
@@BestFriendsWhoLiveTogethermy moma too was not approving of stimming and said to put that thing away. I felt she did the right thing. Soon enough I realized that I don't want this for myself and let my body be depended on some twisting object and I made a decision to put my stimming object under a pillow and refused to touch it. Eventually it went away. I still try to regulate this if any stimming occurs. Be mindful of it. I feel more confident in my body and think more clearly when I overcome such things and pay attention and let my body be fine without that and find other soothing activities to focus on. I did the same with smoking, it's another stim and can become very addicted to it. One day decide to stop to stim and smoke and the next day no more
Also, unrelated to main content, but:
- Nice bangs! They look pretty.
- Nice singing voice!
- Congrats on home ownership status!
I know it's not the point but you have an incredible voice.
Edit: Ps this is coming from a singer who is extremely judgemental of people's voices lol. But that tone is beautiful and perfectly on pitch. Also great shape to the notes.
took the words right out of my mouth
She gives Billie Eilish a run for her money!
right? it’s so calming
I stopped what I was doing to listen. That's pretty rare -- usually I use RUclips as background noise.
I wouldn’t be surprised if she has people in the music industry begin reaching out to her. I too came in from the other room to watch and listen, and I almost never stop what I’m doing to actually watch what I’m listening to. Her voice legitimately calmed me.
I was a HUGE happy flapper as a kid, but I quickly became embarrassed by the looks I would receive and taught myself to immediately stop if I caught myself doing it. I still flap to a lesser degree and I’m trying to be kinder to myself about it. I can’t describe the joy that welled up in me seeing you stim so freely. Thank you Paige 💕
Same thing here!! Watching this video made me realize that I repress my stims even when I'm by myself, which is stupid. The judmental voice of society got inside of my mind, time to expel It
Same for me, except I stopped, because my parents told me to stop being weird and stop acting like a baby
Oh have the same experience.. I did wierd repetitive movements with hands, mouth and feet .. but while growing up I realized it was wierd like people but more family getting pissed and wierded out.. so now i stop myself whenever I feel the urge to stim.. sometimes I still do that with my hands and mouth when noone looks never realized it could be stimms..
For me i only flap my hands when I just lifted something heavy or if I feel like I touched something dirty
@@devonmunn5728 interesting i might do that when I feel like I touched something dirty I don't really pick up heavy thing I show watch to see if I do it
I know this is a little off topic but can we talk about how ANGELIC her voice is AAAAHHH ITS SO PRETTY 💚💚💚
No lie, you are the person that made me feel comfortable with my stims. I used to hide them so much, people would ask me what I was doing and I would pretend that they didn’t see me stim. That was my life. I feel so much more confident in my own body since I stoped suppressing them
I can relate. I always get this flash of primal fear if someone walks in on me stimming and immediately just pretend I wasn't. As if I'd been doing something I wasn't supposed to.
I on the other hand feel more confident in my body by overcoming stims and not letting my body depend on such things as it should be fine without them
My stimming tends to make people super f*ckin uncomfortable. I can't stand most textures, and when I'm on the phone I have to have some kind of oral stim during(relatable to smokers) and will walk in small circles hundreds of times if no one checks me on it. Sorry for the comments just writing as I listen! And you have a BEAUTIFUL singing voice
YO ANOTHER CIRCLE WALKER!!! I tend to do so as like a calming mechanism and it feels super relaxing in general doing loops and figure 8s- not just if on the phone, but I feel a little less alone now!!
Oh I wonder if the "walking while on the phone" thing is another like common neurotypical stim. Also the "bye bye bye bye bye " at the end of calls for some reason.
@@Nitzah yessss and people always tell me it's so annoying lol youre my people
@@IIITrunks haha I did the bye bye bye one when I was younger but it could be a kid thing for me 😂
it's not normal to walk in circles every time you're on the phone ?
When I flapped my hands to stim as a kid, my grandmother would tell me "don't do that, you look autistic". I find it regretful that she would try to shame me for being myself. She judges everyone from a glance. In my experience, the only people who care about what people think of them, are those who also judge other people for irrelevant things.
Edit: I don't agree with my previous sentence; I don't think everyone who cares about what others think of them also judge people. A lot of you in the comments changed my mind about this, and I'm really sorry for ever making this assumption. I can understand the anxiety that comes with strangers staring at you.
I'm trans, and gender dysphoria is a constant worry when I go out. I always wonder if people can notice that something is "off" with me. It was kind of hypocritical of me to talk like I don't also care about what others think of me. Again, sorry for making any of you feel uncomfortable!
I've actually had a Karen point me out to her daughter in the park and warn her to "keep away from people like that." She certainly wouldn't have made that observation about Paige, even if Paige were stimming.
@@cityman2312 what the hell
When I rock back and forth my mom says that. I'm not diagnosed I just like rocking.
@@alegria1813 hopefully, someday your mother will realise how hurtful her words can be. Sorry you have to deal with this now. 😥
that's horrible, I'm sorry bout that :(. I have to disagree though, I don't think that people who care about what people think of them are those who judge people from irrelevant things. Or they probably do for some extent, but I think that the people that care the most about what people think about them don't judge people for irrelevant things. If you're thinking about yourself all the time you don't have much time thinking about others, except for what they think of you. Personally I struggle to be in my own house because of my neighbours, if they see me, what they think of me etc, (i've actually heard them talk ill of me which didnt make things better) The stress and fear of what people think of me stays with me all the time, and I do not judge people for irrelevant things. But not everyone works like me, perphaps everyone is as judgeful as it feels :(
I'm so happy that you've talked about how stimming is not reserved for autistic or neurodivergent persons. As a neurotypical, I stim a lot, and it has always made me uncomfortable in social situation, because I feel like people are going to judge me for doing something you wouldn't expect in such or such setting. As a child, I wouldn't really care nor realise this, but growing up, having friends being embarrassed over me doing things in public really created some kind of Pavlovian response and I started restricting myself more and more. I hope that one day, everyone can just do what they want when they want, as long as it doesn't hurt anyone else.
PS: Singing is also something I love very much, I literally can't spend a day without doing so! I'm happy to see I'm not alone :)
Same! I'm neurotypical and I stim a ton, often in harmful ways. People tell me to stop, but it feels like hell to stop.
I'm too shy to sing as much as I want to :(
@@sparkstudies1675 I hope you get over that someday. Singing is so therapeutic!
@@kennethwayne6857not in public places
@@dreamthedream8929 Ahh, depends.
As a person with both touretts and autism, singing is a huge stim for me. There are Moments I don’t realize I’m doing it, and my mom stops me ‘cause it’s “ embarrassing out in public.” I really appreciate someone normalizing stimming in public. 😊😊
I masked for so long in public and still find myself masking for my safety but if I’m just minding my business and feel confident I will sing, skip, hop, bounce, and fiddle with a sensory object in public and I make a point to smile at anyone that looks at me like I’m odd. Y’all are the odd ones just aimlessly walking in a store with no life added.
I have Tourettes too. Does stimming trigger your tics (if u don't mind me asking. I'm just trying to see if it's a "me thing")
i dont mind at all. it really depends on how im stimming. if its vocally it doesn't normally, but some stims can trigger my tics. fx. high pitched stims trigger me. but most of the time it physical stims that trigger my tics. hope that helps 😊 never be afraid to ask questions♥ have a great day @@ariellegrace7635
thats great to hear. The world really needs to make more space for everyone, and stop judging. have a great day @@maddyvogel1985
It's fascinating how different you look when fully immersed in your stims, the mask just comes off.
I disagree. Who said she was masking in this video? Your statement is pretty loaded. Before I start explaining why, let me just tell you I’m not offended. I like finding the truth, and this seemed like a good challenge for me to do so.
You say the mask comes off when she starts stimming. What does that mean? Does that mean that she is always holding back the urge to stim? Or that the only real thing about her is how she acts when stimming? I can’t go any further without you responding. But hopefully this could be the first step to finding the truth.
@@redcupfb yes
@@redcupfb Are you neroutypical? Or Neroudiverse? Do you even know what masking is?
Seeing other people be more open about stimming helps.
Stims are so misunderstood. Thank you for being so candid with us to represent the community.
as an autistic POC I have to say you are darn right about it being "dangerous" to stim for people like me. It makes people feel uneasy more than "white" people stimming in public for some unknown reason. Just wondering if you have witnessed this in real life or is it from something you heard or read?
I keep thinking about Arnaldo Rios Soto.
It's the systemic racism. People have learned to consider unusual actions from POC as "suspicious" behavior and fear it. Then with the way cops treat people, yelling orders without explanation and expecting respect and immediate obedience, well, you can see how many autistic POC would get screwed
@@kiarranarisse r u on the spectrum?
@@steve_x9582 Yep, along with my brother
I sometimes sing/hum gospel songs for stimming. It's less obvious.
The children I work with stim a lot and it’s so wholesome to see their peers accepting their jumps, squeals and other stimming 🥰
their peers shouldn't have to deal with such distraction.
find non distracting behaviors
@@casebeth wtf kind of comment is that. Some cant help the way they do things its not something that can be controlled. My son is almost 3 and i cant control how he stims wether other people think its weird or distracting or not. So should he just not go to preschool because you dont want to be distracted by someone who does something differently than you because youre neurotypical and they are not? Pretty selfish dont you think.
@@casebeth why? to please people like you who are rude think that everything needs to be accommodated to them? “itS diStrActInG” Get over it. Any and everything can be distracting.
@@ambergreenwell9009 no because schools and the workplace should be as comfortable as possible for as many as possible. The majority shouldn't have to put up with constant distraction and irritating behavior
@@casebeth If schools and workplace should be as comfortable as possible for as many as possible what about the kid you’re forcing to be uncomfortable by not allowing them to stim? If you think *forcing* a child to sit still and do nothing when they can’t or when it makes them feel uneasy is a good thing, then you have a lot to learn.
Amber Greenwell makes a good point, anything and everything can be a possible distraction for somebody.
If a child stims a lot and can’t control it why should they be the one to stop?
My daughter is almost 3 & she has stimmed in a very particular way since she was about 8 months old. When she sees something new, feels the wind on her face, gets tired, sees something that makes her incredibly happy her entire body tensed up, her mouth opens (almost like a surprised look) & her hands open and shut next to her face. I’ve had people ask “what is she doing…?” And I simply tell them “she is feeling and seeing the world in ways that most can’t & its her way of expressing that through her body” I LOVE when my daughter stims. I encourage it. She is it OT & Speech right now. ABA was suggested and when I did my research and saw that stimming was one of those things seen as a “negative, interrupting behavior” I bawled my eyes out. There was no way in hell someone was going to change that about my girl. She is beautiful and amazing and I’d have it no other way.
Thank you so much for explaining stimming from an autism standpoint. It helped me understand a lot more why my daughter stims & I appreciate it so much.
I was stopped from stimming ALL MY LIFE, sometimes with medication, sometimes with yelling. In school I was punished constantly.
Now I'm learning to do it again and, frankly, watching you is really helping. Also it does feel very good, but I am still slightly scared to do it
After learning about stims, it seems like there are popular neurotypical versions:
Visual stims for neurotypicals - when they check out satisfying compilations, like someone fitting a puzzle piece perfectly or making a perfect ice cream cone spiral, or hand drawing a perfectly round-looking circle, etc.
Auditory stims for neurotypicals - when they check out ASMR compilations, like listening to someone type keys on a keyboard, click a pen repeatedly, crinkle plastic wrapping, etc.
Anyone else agree, or am I wrong about this?
The most extreme neurotypicals think even stuff like that is weird.
One well-known, but totally normie stim is singing in the shower.
Yes yes yes
I’m nerotypical (I think) and I have a lot of auditory Stims (and physical) when I’m anxious. My most common one is making pop noises with my mouth
And popping bubble wrap!
i had developed so much shame when it comes to stimming especially those stims that really made me stand out. seeing you now and seeing other autistics on the internet in general has helped me immensely. my body even remembered some of the stims i used to do in childhood!!!! best source of happiness
Some support: The crisis lines are on google. Maybe search up the instructions to. The instructions for Canada (686868), just text the word text or Text or TEXT I'm not sure which one. They are also on Quora (the phone numbers) if you search up something bad mental health related. They show up at the top.
i recently talked to my mom about possibly being autistic and when I brought up stimming she was like "no you don't stim stimming is more visible and dangerous" and it was so invalidating... I'm 20 years old and i stim in ways that aren't that visible or are more acceptable in public.. it's more visible/"weird movements" when im alone. hearing my mom completely deny me when i was trying to open up to her was super hurtful. if you're a friend or family member of someone with autism, or even someone who thinks they might have autism, don't act like you know them more than they know themselves.. there are always things you don't know about them. they could act completely different when they aren't masking..
i felt this. almost the same thing happened to me but i think i have adhd
My mom is the exact same way. Shuts down everything I say unless it can be used against me. I opened up to her about my depression and suicidal thoughts and she said “no you’re fine, you don’t seem depressed at all. Depressed people don’t shower or get out of bed” and then a week later my room was messy and she said “your messy room is why you’re depressed, you need to clean it now or I’m cancelling your flight to visit your sister” keep in mind I’m 21 years old and living at home while I go to college.
@@gracerideshorses7309 i hope u get better and get your life out of this enviroment. I had depression and once things get better i was soooooo thankful i manage to survive that. You're future self is waiting for you 😊😊
@@gracerideshorses7309 that’s so messed up of her. Like make it make sense
I have just been diagnosed with Autism at 24 years old. I don't stim in the more obvious sense, also only at home when Im alone or with my partner, but I've never been someone who hand flaps or anything obvious. However, I am still autistic! I also wonder sometimes if I suppressed my natural stims, because I was brought up being scolded for any odd or socially unacceptable movements (I also have chronic tic disorder so would get scolded a lot for tics as a child) My mom, although trying her best, still says the most hurtful ableist things to me without even realizing it. She doesn't realize shes being offensive. So I feel you
I work as a TA with 3-5 year olds and used to really try and hide my stimming but actually the kids really feed off the energy when I stim while talking about an exciting topic and I’ve had kids that wouldn’t usually engage with lessons be engaged when I’m teaching because they see how exciting I find it.
watching you stim makes me really wonder what I would be if I didnt mangle my mind with masking. And I am really happy and greatful for your generation. I do sing, hum, whistle, etc. but you know. it annoys people.
I'm sorry it annoys people. And probably makes you feel uncomfortable doing it around them. I love to sing.
Yep, it annoys people... And i am annoyed by people being annoyed because of such a stupid reason :/ i am not harming anyone by singing/humming and i am not bad at singing either, so, i am just like "let me breath please"...
@@justahuman9273 When you're trying to concentrate, and someone is whistling, how is that not annoying
@@LurpakSpreadableButter
Just because your Neuro typical doesn’t mean you have the right to tell neurodivergent people they can’t sim just because it annoys you it’s how they feel the best and can be the best them they can be
And such big congrats on your home! I'm glad you mentioned how police react to these behaviors. A close friend of mine at the time was deaf and had tourettes, and police threw him on the ground and put a BAG OVER HIS HEAD because he couldn't hear them say "put your hands up!" Granted he was being approached bc of his violent behavior but regardless to me it was extremely wrong to do to a person with these conditions.
Wtf?!! I swear fuck the police tbh they really just abuse their power and use it as an opportunity to literally ABUSE people and get away with it bc of that power 🥴🥴. Disgusting. I hope your friend got a decent lawyer and pressed charges on the use of putting a bag over his head!
Honestly they should have obligatory sign language classes at least for the sign language of the country they work in
Excuse me but what the actual fuck-
Yeah... They said he was trying to bite them. Which I would consider self defense under these circumstances. He wanted to sue but didn't because he had other legal shit going on, luckily they dropped it so he didn't have to pay to be assaulted. Unluckily it's not like they apologize or correct their sick behavior. I totally agree basic signing should be mandatory to learn. He literally talks like he's deaf(you know what I mean, his voice isn't quite a normal tone and he mispronounces some things and his volume fluctuates) and they still acted that way. He kept saying "what? I don't have my hearing aid." And they attacked.
That’s horrible!! I’m sorry that happened.
Lol I was helping my dad with a DIY thing and he needed a little bottle of glue shaken up because it was old so he handed it to me and I started stimming. Did the job pretty well!
Shaking up warhammer paints is oddly satisfying.
I hope the way I say this comes across correctly. As someone who works in special education it makes me so hopeful to see you understanding your stimming, and being an advocate for it. I work closely with OT to provide effective stims for my students and when they find something that provides them that relief they need it is so life changing. Thank you for being an advocate and educating those around you. You’re truly amazing Paige.
I think stimming is common with any neurological disorder.
My teen daughter has had stimming behaviours since she was a baby. She is not on the autistic spectrum, but she does have ADD and anxiety, and she especially stims when she is anxious or stressed. What she does is rock her upper body back and forth. When she was a baby, she did it in her crib. Now she does it when she is alone and listening to music on her headphones. I think the music relaxes her. She also uses the music as a way to disguise her stimming. If you walk in on her while she is rocking, she will claim that she is just moving to the music (but mom knows better😉).
My beautiful 4yr old baby girl has just recently been diagnosed with Autism . Your videos are helping me so much navigate this journey . 💗
Also, yes! That’s exactly how I feel when I have the urge to stim, like a build up, then a release of endorphins when you let it happen. When you suppress it, it makes the build up more uncomfortable. Like a mosquito bite that’s really itchy, but not allowed to touch it. The urge will eventually go away, but it isn’t pleasant.
actully having felt both urges within the span of 2 hours i can say they are veeerrrry similar except one is more... primal then the other
Yes like smoking, that's what happens. But like smoking (which is just another stim) various stims can also be overcome and regulated out of respect for others or yourself
I'm neurotypical but my leg shakes, particularly when tired. A doctor told me it was Restless Leg Syndrome so it's different from a stim but has a similar releasing effect. I can stop it but it makes the urge to do it worse. My family, who I live with, grab my leg to try and stop it from shaking. It has no negative effect on them and I need to do it, but they still try and force me to stop. I hope the world becomes more accepting of stimming or 'abnormal' behaviour.
That sounds so frustrating. I hope they learn to respect your boundaries and to not just reach out and stop your body doing something natural for it.
♡
My partner has restless leg, he didn’t think he was on the spectrum until we realised he probably had ADD, we find weighted blankets help a lot with restless legs.
I’ve self diagnosed with restless legs but I’ve been looking more into potential neurodivergent conditions. My legs are always moving and I have stimulation toys I use all the time that are really helpful for me
I will say, I sometimes get anxious if I see someone shaking their leg a lot (I have GAD), so it might be bothering them? However, if they know about your condition, they definitely shouldn't be forcing you to stop.
@@jogold867 That one's tough, especially when both parties have a diagnosis (whatever the diagnosis may be). My sister sometimes bounces her leg, and while it generally isn't a problem, if I can feel it (either through the floor, the table if we're at a table, whatever we're sitting on (like a bench), or something like that), if it's in my line of vision and I can't block it out, or if it's making a sound (such as shoes squeaking or scuffing on the floor), it drives me absolutely insane because it's sensory overload that I can't escape - even though I know what is causing her to do it, that knowledge makes no difference in how my brain reacts to it. But if I can't feel, see, or hear it myself, I don't care. It comes down to a conflict of accommodations, so to speak, and that can be tricky to resolve.
I think it would be better to compare tics to sneezing, and stims to coughing, because although you can't really control a sneeze you can control a cough if you want to. So yeah I guess, just wanted to throw that out there
Yeah I never thought of coughing but it’s very similar! I always compared stims to scratching a particularly annoying itch
What about when when you are doing the stimming action without conscious awareness? Properly trying to find the right term for this.
Sorry for being nitpicky but I get tics and I can control my sneezes a lot of the time. The best phrasing I've heard for a tic is comparing it to a computer glitch, but maybe its different for other people.
I had meds that gave me tics and there's still one that's persisting now that I'm off, but to me they feel like a shiver. it tickles you till u HAVE to move. I can suppress it, but then it's just gonna come back later as a bigger "shiver".
Wait, you can control coughs? How? That’s an honest question, because I can’t stop any of my coughs; but I can stop most of my sneezes... this comment made me feel so alien now. 😳
I had no idea that singing could be a stim! I’m trying to educate myself on stiming as a neurotipical person, so this was a great video for me! Sometimes I’ll wake up and be like “aah I need to sing a certain note!” Just cause it feels nice idk, so maybe that’s a stim! Great video, I love learning more
You sing extremely well and when you were doing 'Hallelujah' I got 4 chills/stims from it. Beautiful. Perhaps this may help. I read a science fiction short story about a boy who had to 'unwind' himself to feel more 'normal'. As he grew older he learned to save his unwinding until the end of the day when he could do what turns/twists/spins he needed in private. As the story ended it was revealed that he was born in orbit and his unwinding was to realign himself with a particular planet and the unwinding was as if a cord or string were connecting him to that planet and has to be untwisted from time to time.
Maybe stimming is a reaction to a build up of some unseen tension from an unknown source (or no source at all) that needs to be released in the only way you have found to do that. I find myself turning around 'the other way' when I feel a tension build up. I also have the 'Jimmy leg' as described by Kramer from Seinfeld TV show.
That's such a sweet story, do you remember what it was called?
Before I was told by my therapist that she thinks I have autism and everything that I did started to click into place. Whenever I’m in social situations I leave and go to the bathroom or something and I flap my hands and arms (stimming) and I used to think I was weird for doing things that are deemed ‘childish’ and ‘weird’. But know that I know this about myself, I feel way more at ease with myself. And have started to let myself stim more. I still mask a lot in public but every now and then I will let my self stim for a while, kinda like what you did in this video, and I don’t feel ashamed of myself.
Thank you sm for your account you’ve helped me a lot.
“Everybody Stims”
Put that on a T-shirt!
exactly
Your singing voice is really soothing. I sing too especially when driving.
I'm an autistic teen (rn on my little sisters account) and I also have anxiety which causes me to fidget/stim even harder and when I'm having an anxiety attack I move my legs back and forth really fast. Most people get confused and weirded out even though I don't even stim half as much around people so I'm glad that people like you are teaching others about this:)
I used to have anxiety about school homework. I would kick my feet against a brace under our big living room table. The worse I felt, the faster and harder I kicked. I ended up breaking the brace completely off the legs of table! Mom told me tho, that I only finished what my older siblings started.
I used to kick this random pole on the underside of my chair. No idea why but now realising it might be a stim.
I like singing as a stim! I can sing for hours and hours! Im glad you talked about neurodivergent poc and the dangers of stimming in public! Also I am an age regressor so alot of my toys, pacis, and teethers help out when I'm feeling stimmy. I'm in the process of getting a diagnosis for autism and its been pretty stressful so I have been feeling very stimmy lately. Seeing other people stim also makes want to stim. I hope one day I'll be confident and safe enough to stim in public.
Oh! The joy in her face when she pops them makes me feel so happy
this made me feel way better about behaviours I’ve always tried to suppress because it’s not considered normal (I’m an adult woman in my early 20s and in process of getting diagnosed atm), and it’s so nice to understand and see someone else try to describe the feeling of stimming, cos it’s kind of indescribable
Thank you SO much Paige for bringing awareness to poc stimming vs Caucasian individuals & how police view them are completely different. This is so important as my daughter is 5, black & autistic. Stimming should be more normalized as a whole 💜
The singing with the popit made me so happy. I sing all the time as a stim so I really relate🥹
This is the first video of yours Ive watched and just wanted to say *thank you* for talking about the differences that a person of color may face in society. And how it is different from them. It is important. So. Thank you.
My almost 3 yr old stims by yelling when she's excited, side to side sway, chewing, smelling or caressing her face or fingers with her blankie, making certain sounds over & over. I love it all 🖤🥰
Oh my god the blankie thing. I’ve never ever heard of anyone else doing this. I’ll be 21 and I still do it with my childhood blankie. Thank you for commenting this ❤️
Well hope the yelling goes away as she gets older, that's one stim that's not okay especially when out in public.
Now I know I’ve had lots of stims my whole life, but I didn’t initially think I did. Then I learned my nonstop singing was a vocal and auditory stim and that opened me up to learning more and accepting that this was a huge part of me. Lovely voice, it’s always so wonderful to hear from another sing-stimmer!
You said accepting a part of you. Some support (I also have another reply): The crisis lines are on google. Maybe search up the instructions to. The instructions for Canada (686868), just text the word text or Text or TEXT I'm not sure which one. They are also on Quora (the phone numbers) if you search up something bad mental health related. They show up at the top.
Wow I just realized that too.
Same, until I joined a discord for adhd and autism I didn't realize how often I stim. I sing all the time, bite my nails, and braid pieces of my hair and didn't really consider those stims until a few people told me, also I have some more obvious stims that I do sometimes but really only in private or under extreme stress because I've always been scared of people thinking I'm weird (not that anyone I've grown up with has ever really thought I was normal, though I didn't realize all the reasons people bullied me were related to symptoms of adhd and autism until now and those things that I thought I had to change about myself because they were what was wrong with me wasn't me improving my social skills, it was just me masking my symptoms for a prolonged amount of time so people would finally leave me alone about it)
Your freckles are so cute!!! Paige has been getting SUN!
how would you know that tho?
@@artemisthefoul7597 because freckles are caused by sun exposure?
The way you compared stimming to masturbation was brilliant. You are so entertaining to watch and this was so informative. I realised recently that I like to stim and have recently referred myself to my local autism screening service as I am not diagnosed and believe I may be on the autism spectrum. Keep doing what you do and keep being you!! Thank you
Masturbating indeed can be a great stim, when alone. But some stims are not okay in public such as pulling your pants down and masturbating or yelling or other disruption behaviors
You are just so self aware and do the work that EVERYONE should do. I think your self-work on emotion regulation-and your channel in general- are such an incredible service to the world. I have two sons, ages 17 and 7. The oldest was believed to have ADHD growing up, but didn’t respond to meds, and was later diagnosed as having OCD. My youngest son was diagnosed with Tourette’s over the summer, but has not yet displayed OCD or ADHD behaviors. Your videos are such a great resource for me as I work to try to embrace my sons and meet them where they are, and hopefully be able to help them when they need me to advocate for them. I believe it is MY JOB to learn how they learn best and adapt to them, rather than expect them to succeed in a world that isn’t suited for them.
I do something my family called “happy hands” which I now found out is called flapping, my most common stim
We called our daughter's flapping "happy hands" too 😁
Lol I just did it while reading this 😂
I love how your family didn't give a negative connotation to something they might not have understood 💕
What a beautiful term! I work with kids and think ‘happy hands’ is such a lovely way to refer to flapping
It only happen when I’m really exited but I always end up fanning my face or clapping really aggressively
13:40 and I am crying over how much I felt through her voice. This was an amazing video, all the insight and information was on point and suddenly beautiful acapella singing to then finish it up on further information, this was a powerful video.
I love how you help people to relate to you even if they are neurotypical. I find educating my classmates about how I work and some of my friends work is done most efficiently when I help them see similarities between us and them, to eliminate that segregation of thought and understand we are all just people and function like people, so, in understanding that, we can understand each other.
Thank you for your video. It's been super enlightening! I just got diagnosed with autism and adhd on Aug 20, 2021. I had no idea that I was stimming my entire life. Repeating what others say, repeatedly opening my mouth, flicking my thumb up and down my fingertips, popping bubblewrap, rubbing my cat's super soft fluffy belly for hours at a time, rubbing my hand in fleece blankets, singing deeply so it vibrates my whole body. I'm sure there are others that I just don't realize.
I definitely need one of this colored stuff that pops. The sound of it makes me so happy !
I've had complicated feelings towards my brother for most of my life. He were my best friend when we were little but I also often felt annoyed, disgusted, irritated etc around him. He used to flap his hands and I used to think that was dumb. After learning about stimming, I realized he's flapping his hands when he's really excited about something. Now it's become my soft spot, I still have a lot of negative feelings towards him (which is not his fault but they are a result of my diagnoses and how I see others) but I find the hand flapping so precious and something about him that really doesn't annoy me or irritate me in any way, as I all of a sudden UNDERSTAND it! Understanding things is everything!
I wish my family could be as understanding as you are :( all of my behaviors were seen as "strange" or some other negative adjectives were applied to it. I should mention that I went undiagnosed, but it still felt terrible growing up that I wasn't allowed to do those things
I just have to say when you sang hallelujah I got tears in my eyes, you sing so beautifully. Also, thank you for all of your videos. You help so many people understand others and their selfs so much better, nd and nt alike. Also, you are just truly amazing in every way.
honestly it was absolutely beautiful oh my gosh
I chew a lot, ever since I was a kid. I have permanent scars on my fingers from chewing too much. Pens, pencils, barbie feet... When I learned about chewlery, I had to buy a ton... You can just LOOK at things and know they'll feel great on your teeth (or behind your molars. Love that.)
That craft foam that comes in sheets, ugh I love that texture... Stuff that has a good rubbery squish like barbie legs and those good pens with the rubbery grips. Yes.
I used to keep strep throat when I was younger b/c I would chew on EVERYTHING. If I was holding something it was subconsciously in my mouth. I've managed to mostly contain the habit by becoming a leg shaker and a hand fidgeter.
I also chew a lot, as a child my parents gave me rubber tubing to chew on, or I would chew on my bedpost ( made of wood, of not child safe paint ) or stuffed animals.
Man chewing on those Polly pocket and Barbie
Doll feet hit DIFFERENT 🤤
I used to have stims like that, but I stopped at some point in middle school. Not because people made fun of me, it just became less satisfying
I chew the inside of my cheeks and always have. I have a ridge of scars on both sides.
"bouncing leg up and down when your stressed"
me literally doing that at that very moment
GIRL!!! O-M-G-G!! I just got hired to work in a special needs class. We have 6 students...at least 5 have Autism, all different levels. You have helped me tremendously!! Some of our students touch themselves, but not as a sexual gratification thing. I recognized it as stimming as the students were not "completing the task", so to speak :) Your video is an absolute eye opener and I am going to share it with my co-workers
I sing, too. I, too, sing, a lot. You've a great singing voice, too. Wish we could sing together on stage while playing piano or guitar. Anyway, ... I also bought a huge, round, soft, blue pillow that is severely soft to use in stimming. Another is a fidget spinner and a toy that clicks as you bend the mechanical pieces to force the toy into a different shape.
I love that you have the confidence to be authentically you. There are so many things I'd love to do like the stimming here in your video but I just feel society wouldn't accept it. I'm white myself but I loved you acknowledge how much more difficult it is for POC as well.
AH! BANGS! CUTIE!
Edit: Vocal stims are great for me, I love how certain words or songs feel. I also love to make geometric shapes drawing in the air with my hands or feet etc. Just feels right.
I used to love to draw 3D Geometric shapes in grade school. I just thought it looked like the coolest thing ever
Folks: We've got words on racist discrimination, we've got pansexual pride, we've got words on self-pleasure, and as always, we've got terms and experiences related to autism. And an invitation to everyone to stim?! I rate this video based :D
Huh? Based???? Is this a supposed dis or compliment ….
Hi, yes, it's a compliment! I don't actually know where calling things based comes from, but it means something like, "This is very cool and good and I support it"@@darlinqtoni
@@huntermorgan4201 oh ok good! Haha I am a suspecting audhd person so I don’t understand my generations slang and words😂😂😂😂😂they just pop out of nowhere plus I don’t follow mainstream pop culture stuff anyways hahahah
No worries. I'm also neurodivergent (still figuring out which flavor/s), but I often feel like I sit just between the two ways of navigating the world. Like I can run on either set of tracks, or like I'm an interpreter for people who speak two different languages@@darlinqtoni
@@huntermorgan4201same usually those are the audhd people cuz the two sorta balance em out performance wise and all the neurotypicals are like yes your normal and then you get closer and they are like oh no you are different hahahah
Oh my, your singing voice is just so soothing. I just feel so relaxed after listening to it( I was having a peculiar morning emotionally for some reason). If you ever make a album/cd/whatever that had you singing, I would DEFINITELY buy it
The more I research about autism in girls the more I think that I might be autistic but at the same time I know that it is bad to self diagnose and I’m scared that I’m making it all up in my mind and I don’t really wanna tell my parents that I think this cuz I think they will just brush it off
I’m in the same boat 💕 check out Paige’s video on self diagnosis
I have another reply, but phone numbers you can call are on google. Just make sure that you find the right country.
im in the exact same place, it's just a war in my brain lmao
same but with adhd, i feel you
Hey, if you want a diagnoses i fully understand that. That being said. If you are or are not autistic, you are you and every part of you is okey. I had wondered myself if I might be autistic, verry possebly have a form of adhd mayby possebly have tourets. But then for me atleast I came to the conclusion it might to not know beceause I am a peace with who I am and what I do that seem like symthoms of these things. I know I am comfortabel. So that is what I wisch for you. To be comfortebel with your self no matter what you diside. Good luck❤
I've got a full-body stim that's incredibly obvious to anyone around me. I learned early on not to do it, and to my parents and everyone, I grew out of it. But even at 23, I'll sometimes try to seclude myself and stim for a few seconds. At home alone, if something interesting (not necessarily good or bad) happens, I'll just start doing that stim for minutes at a time, not really able to stop myself until I've worn myself out.
For most of my life, I had no idea why the heck I did that. I have *never* heard of someone doing the same thing. Only recently did I realize it's a stim and may be connected to some undiagnosed Autism.
Same for me
There is also something called psychogenic non-epileptic seizure disorder that can happen to people with trauma or PTSD and can include their whole bodies. Might want to check that out.
I have always felt the urge to rock back and forth when I sit on the floor. It’s a been a thing since early elementary but I remember being told not to do it or else I’d be labeled as “retarded”. I definitely suppressed a harmless stim that would have made me feel better all because of ableism
This video is the one that introduced me to your channel and I am glad it was this one. As a 34 year old male with autism it is very difficult to even exist with the constant criticism or demoralizing comments. Your videos are amazing and you really are doing something amazing here on RUclips. Thank you!
Hey! I'm a neurotypical girl who has really enjoyed your channel so far. While I do not have autism, I find that I can really relate to some points that you talk about. I was very smart in school, but didn't have many friends and struggled to relate to others. I shared your interest in being right, and I didn't understand why other people wouldn't want to find the absolute truth. Every time I start to learn a new subject, I get completely overwhelmed with questions and understanding how much I don't know. I've also got some hypersensitivity to senses like being driven wild by any tiny thing touching my face, or getting headaches from the sound of a fan. I love that I'm able to find things in common with you, because it is so much easier to understand and be empathetic to a person or group of people if you can relate to them. I also love how you talk about how you solve the problems you have, such as setting up your space in a way that reduces the number of steps to get a task done, and how you talked about stimming. I often make clicking noises with my mouth when I need to focus, and shuffle a deck of cards when I'm feeling anxious. You've helped me to understand why I do those things, and that those actions are useful for me to regulate my emotions, and I'm leaning into it! This has provided great insight into how I can accommodate autistic people when I interact with them. Thank you for helping me to understand autism more, and also helping me grow! You're so articulate, well educated, and approachable, you're doing a great job of raising awareness!
@3:19 Yes! RESPECT for you bringing awareness that people of color are more likely to be arrested/judged even harsher and etc... just for having autism. 💯👍🙌🙌🙌
i cannot believe i never thought of that happening
Thankyou for giving a timestamp of when the video actually starts. Was never a big fan of vloggerisms where the person would ramble about what's going on in their lives for a few minutes before actually starting to explain the point of their video.
You with the popper is so adorable. You’re so happy 🥰🥰
Wtf she did the most perfect run at the end when she sang geez
I suspect that I have low support autism and I’m currently dealing with emotional suppression. I feel I’ve learned to stim in sneaky ways to be socially acceptable. Hearing you describe stimming is giving me the courage to keep going to get back in touch with myself. Thank you for sharing
Omg the joy on your face at the little popping sounds makes me grin so, so hard!
I looked this up and I think I would get the blue more clicky keys. It seems like the red ones are more muted, right?
I'm a neurotypical and this was so interesting. Thank you for sharing! As a neurotypical I stim with bouncing my leg but also this video made me realize I stim by singing too. Sometimes when I'm somewhere public, I really want to sing or hum and it makes me feel really uncomfortable not to do it. I also can't focus if it's silent, like if I'm trying to draw or play a game I need to have some noise that I can control going on in the background like an audiobook or a tv-show. Depending on what I'm doing. If there is no noise I get uncomfortable and can't focus.
"Sit with that uncomfortability for a minute." YAAAS, girl!! THAT'S how you change the world!
Wow, your singing voice is amazing!
Was literally swaying and rocking as I watched this which is definitely one of my sims 😆
You have a beautiful singing voice to, I'm glad it brings you joy.
I never thought about how POC could be so negatively perceived for displaying traits of neurodivergence or disability! Thank you for mentioning that, it's definitely opened my eyes
Ive never been diagnosed with autism or anything but I have always bounced my leg and bite my nails. I used to think it was out of boredom but it always makes me feel SO good while I do it. I also have to have something playing in the background. I even sleep with fans, music, audiobooks, and/or podcasts.
I’m not sure if making loud noises count as stimming because when I’m stressed I’ll make an annoying noises and it makes me feel better. It weirds my coworkers out so I try not to at work but that’s where I feel the need to.
I never knew that others do things like this!!
You said stressed. Some support: The crisis lines are on google. Maybe search up the instructions to. The instructions for Canada (686868), just text the word text or Text or TEXT I'm not sure which one. They are also on Quora (the phone numbers) if you search up something bad mental health related. They show up at the top.
this reply (my reply right now, here) will make sense if you read my other reply here. Phone numbers are on google. Find the one for your country.
As a person with sensory processing disorder, I stim non stop. I’m so thankful for people bringing acceptance to stimming and educating others on the topic!
I’d LOVE to hear you sing more!! You should start recording covers and posting them on RUclips! I’d watch every single one! ❤️
You're just so sweet, and genuine, and adorable 🥰 Thank you for shedding so much light on this topic and just being you!! You make it easier to be myself too. Can't say thank you enough for being authentic for us all to see ❤️
Seeing you so happy when stimming so lovely to see, I really don't get why some people have such an issue with stimming and people being happy, just seeing people happy that way brightens my day
I've had to suppress my stimming as my parents absolutely hate it (my mum especially). I used to flap my arms and hands a lot but my mum largely got me to stop by yelling at me whenever I did it because it was "a bad habbit". One of the hardest things to control is leg shaking, which I do almost constantly and get yelled at for doing. Around the house, I cover myself in a fluffy blanket, something my parents aren't happy with but accept (even though they constantly make fun of me for it). If I make an odd sound, they get angry with me because "it's what people with severe mental illnesses do"; I also have headphones in most of the time, often listening to music but still listening to everything around me which is another thing I get yelled at for because "I'm not listening" because apparently, nobody can focus on more than one thing at a time.
Are you in school? Maybe you could talk to one of your teachers about this 😊 You're a very strong person and you're great just the way you are 💕
I do a lot of stimming too and my family (mostly my mom) yells at me to stop even when I'm at home. She gets very embarrassed which is rather annoying.
Stumbled across your channel today accidentally. Thank you for these videos, they are helping me understand my sons autism far more than any health professional has.
Also hearing you sing Hallelujah just broke me it was truly beautiful. 🐺❤
Thanks for enlightening me why I like singing so much I recently got diagnosed with ASD and now it makes sense that singing is a good auditory stim as well as the vocalising itself
Seeing your pure joy when stimming is so infectious and encouraging. I'm so glad you can feel free to do it!
Paige I’m allistic but I find your videos to be the most helpful I’ve seen on YT so far for understanding my autistic friends :)
I thought it was really interesting hearing that everyone stims. The most intense desire to stim & intense gratification from stimming I’ve experienced has been while tripping on mushrooms. That may sound weird, but it feels the most relatable to the autistic stim experience you described. Making random vocalizations, touching certain textures for an extended period of time, rolling around on the ground, closely watching something, etc all feel borderline orgasmic with how satisfying they are 😅 it’s like an intense joy explosion. Just thought I’d share! Curious if any other neurotypical people feel similarly :)
This video was so validating for me ❤️ I have ADHD and I’ve always felt weird or like I was an attention seeker when I stimmed or had tics, but seeing Paige being entirely herself made me feel safe
YOUR VOICE IS BEAUTIFUL!!! 🤩
I think my biggest stims are
-Shaking my leg when im stressed
-Literally chewing a pack of gum a day
-When i’m listening to music, i have to be dancing or moving my arms. Sometimes it looks like im directing a choir but more stiff. I love the way i feel music
-Playing with fidget toys especially ones i can squish
I really appreciated this video, and i’m hoping to get more comfortable stimming in public
I don't go through a pack of gum a day, but I will chew the same piece of gum for literally like 8-12 hours and it really helps when I'm in a situation where I'm not able to stim in other ways, primarily school, and I also love music as an auditory stim. I didn't realize until a few months ago that other people listen to music as a stim but since I was little I've always loved to walk or bike to the park close to my house and swing and listen to music for literal hours when I'm overstimulated or understimulated.
Just discovered your channel, and I wanted to say I love how genuine you are. You're not afraid to show your true colors and that makes people like me appreciate themselves a little more perhaps. You're a beautiful person!
Will you make a video about the process of moving and how being autistic effects that process? I recently moved as well and during that time many of my friends and family members saw my ‘autistic side’ fully for the first time because I couldn’t mask anymore
same! moved on halloween 2020, so much going on i curled up on the floor and had a meltdown. not looking forward to having to move ever again 😭
Oh. So, THAT'S why I got so stressed about moving. (I've moved 3 times.)
I moved 6 years ago and still have not gotten around to fully unpacking stuff. It's kinda overwhelming.
@@Volundur9567 same.