ROMANS ARE OVERPOWERED!!! Rome Total War Remastered Is A Perfectly Balanced Game With No Exploits

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  • Опубликовано: 26 сен 2024

Комментарии • 2,2 тыс.

  • @jurassicturtle3666
    @jurassicturtle3666 3 года назад +4946

    "We're going to build Rome and make the Gauls pay for it!"

    • @Kelso540
      @Kelso540 3 года назад +170

      Funnier because thats basically what happened.

    • @ogaucho6235
      @ogaucho6235 3 года назад +30

      @@Kelso540 not even close to reality

    • @SarudeDanstorm
      @SarudeDanstorm 3 года назад +80

      @@ogaucho6235 I believe he was referencing the video

    • @ogaucho6235
      @ogaucho6235 3 года назад +50

      @@SarudeDanstorm Oh, in that case I retract my complain

    • @miskakopperoinen8408
      @miskakopperoinen8408 3 года назад +93

      @@ogaucho6235 Given that Rome conquered Gaul and after the pacification, it became a positive cash flow to Rome through slave trade and taxation, is it not exactly what happened? Gaul was never one of the richest provinces, but it was definitely not a net draw on later Rome's resources.

  • @Jovian999
    @Jovian999 3 года назад +2443

    "If you wish to break a strategy game, look first to the diplomacy system." -Spiff Tzu

    • @conradk.3098
      @conradk.3098 3 года назад +48

      lol... spifftzu, nice.

    • @ZephrymWOW
      @ZephrymWOW 3 года назад +73

      @@conradk.3098 From the art of tea

    • @Venian_the_wanderer
      @Venian_the_wanderer 3 года назад +5

      @@ZephrymWOW YorkShire Tea that is

    • @hiroshell7973
      @hiroshell7973 Год назад +8

      Spiff Tzu's art of Yorkshire tea. (Recap)

  • @gabrielsantiago4929
    @gabrielsantiago4929 3 года назад +2544

    "did you get the trade rights?"
    "Yes."
    "What did it cost?"
    "Everything"

  • @LegendofTotalWar
    @LegendofTotalWar 3 года назад +2370

    wHy yuO kNow PLeY nOrMel?

  • @antonioboutalini5158
    @antonioboutalini5158 3 года назад +697

    “Give me all of your land and money”
    “What do we get in return?”
    “I will forgive you for past grievances”
    “Spectacular deal”
    “Also can we form an alliance”
    “You’re too demanding”

    • @houseking9211
      @houseking9211 3 года назад +99

      "I demand you form an alliance with us, in return we will forget that you declined our offer for an alliance"
      "deal"

    • @Ghost-vi8qm
      @Ghost-vi8qm 3 года назад +1

      @@houseking9211 😂

    • @anti-spiral159
      @anti-spiral159 Год назад +7

      "You can also trade after you give everything to us"
      "Now that's some good art of the deal sire"

    • @riftvallance2087
      @riftvallance2087 Год назад +3

      We asked them nicely

  • @annatardlordofderps9181
    @annatardlordofderps9181 3 года назад +2478

    _Inflation adjusted Caeser had a net worth of about 1 trilllion dollars_
    Spiffing Brit: "Hold my tea cup."

    • @TheArklyte
      @TheArklyte 3 года назад +47

      So... what would Caesar do with 1 trillion pieces of coloured cotton paper?0_o

    • @beefyhaze6311
      @beefyhaze6311 3 года назад +24

      @@TheArklyte beds?

    • @floridaball4896
      @floridaball4896 3 года назад +17

      @@TheArklyte toilet paper

    • @lonzo51191
      @lonzo51191 3 года назад +31

      @@TheArklyte a lot of fancy sleevies to hide his armies ^.^

    • @InSanic13
      @InSanic13 3 года назад +57

      Trying to do an inflation adjustment for that far back in history is really not a great idea. The economy, relative prices of goods, cost of living, etc. were so completely different from today. Usually, historians do monetary comparison between the distant past and present by talking about how many days/months/years worth of a certain category of worker's wages an item or service would cost.

  • @igorwisniewski9412
    @igorwisniewski9412 3 года назад +2180

    Normal exploiters: "I exploit games already released"
    The Spiffing Brit: "Lol, noob, I exploit games before they are released"

    • @AxxLAfriku
      @AxxLAfriku 3 года назад +3

      GAGAGAGAGAGA! I will now count to 3 and then I am still the unprettiest RUclipsr of all time. 1...2...3. GAGAGAGAGAGA!!! Thank you for your attention, dear igor

    • @FeyTheBin
      @FeyTheBin 3 года назад +28

      Spiffing's exploit is so meta, he even exploited to play the game early.

    • @theoneandonlypirates
      @theoneandonlypirates 3 года назад +5

      @@FeyTheBin his exploiting is so meta, it is already occurring in closed beta

    • @etienne8110
      @etienne8110 3 года назад +2

      is that an exploit in itself?

    • @alexmuller6752
      @alexmuller6752 3 года назад +5

      even more inception: exploiting a game before release, 17 years after release^^

  • @malhavoc431
    @malhavoc431 3 года назад +1382

    This video is the absolute embodiment of that "Trade Offer" meme going around.
    I Receive: All your money and land.
    You Receive: Us forgiving a "grievance"

    • @ALEXGIBSONCMG
      @ALEXGIBSONCMG 3 года назад +37

      sounds familiar.................

    • @fingernecklace4817
      @fingernecklace4817 3 года назад +15

      *receive
      "I before E, except after C... except for some other words where that isn't true, because English is a confusing mess"

    • @malhavoc431
      @malhavoc431 3 года назад +3

      @@fingernecklace4817 I English gooded! :B

    • @jmooroof1769
      @jmooroof1769 3 года назад

      More than all their money,

    • @determinedhelicopter2948
      @determinedhelicopter2948 3 года назад

      Unless you're practicing weird science.

  • @florpyjohnson9531
    @florpyjohnson9531 3 года назад +1016

    apparently caesar didn't need to cross the rubicon or march on rome, he just needed a really convincing diplomat and an army of peasants and mercenaries

  • @nathanielflorendo5190
    @nathanielflorendo5190 3 года назад +369

    "Gauls, I hate Gauls!"
    *Proceeds to buy their entire empire.*

    • @dubuyajay9964
      @dubuyajay9964 3 года назад +30

      They can't be Gauls if they're converted into good little Romans. *Taps head while smiling.* :7

    • @mokarokas-1727
      @mokarokas-1727 2 года назад +6

      It's "Gods, I hate Gauls" though, forgive an old Rome: Total War sentimental. =' )

  • @golagiswatchingyou2966
    @golagiswatchingyou2966 3 года назад +673

    “The supreme art of war is to subdue the enemy without fighting.” - Sun Tzu

    • @ianperley233
      @ianperley233 3 года назад +54

      "Flavius Julius! What is best in life?"
      "To Negotiate grievance compensation with your enemies, to have them willingly hand over all their settlements and gold, and to hear the lamentation of their womanly armies!!"

    • @mouldyfart
      @mouldyfart 3 года назад +26

      @@ianperley233 "The supremer art of war is to exploit bugs before they are patched."
      -Sun Tzu 2.0

    • @agihammerthief8953
      @agihammerthief8953 3 года назад +1

      "If fighting is sure to result in victory then you must fight!" - Sun Tzu said that

  • @konstantinschmitz3209
    @konstantinschmitz3209 3 года назад +605

    22:31 British Diplomat during negotiations for the Treaty of Versailles, 1919 colorized

    • @idontlikerome2744
      @idontlikerome2744 3 года назад +22

      "I dont think it will be fun Britannia"

    • @leto8821
      @leto8821 3 года назад +9

      exactly my thoughts! wanted to post it too but glad i am not the only one

    • @ajstevens1652
      @ajstevens1652 3 года назад +30

      "Germany! How about some compensation?"

    • @sagoot
      @sagoot 3 года назад +6

      Accurate

  • @grahamcoombe5461
    @grahamcoombe5461 3 года назад +1017

    “I am altering the deal, pray I don’t alter it any further.” Vader would be proud.

    • @ianperley233
      @ianperley233 3 года назад +35

      "This deal is pretty darn good and I'm happy to be part of it!" - Supreme Gaul Leader Lando Calrissian

    • @daswordofgork9823
      @daswordofgork9823 3 года назад +11

      This deal keeps getting worse all the time!

    • @Exory94
      @Exory94 3 года назад +3

      Indeed.

    • @robbieaulia6462
      @robbieaulia6462 3 года назад +2

      @@Exory94 He's here

    • @FrankVader99
      @FrankVader99 3 года назад +1

      Of course ! :)

  • @ThePikachuThing
    @ThePikachuThing 3 года назад +302

    That Roman diplomat must be one smooth talker to convince people he’s just met to hand over all their money and land for nothing but his words 😂

    • @ХристоМартунковграфЛозенски
      @ХристоМартунковграфЛозенски 3 года назад +15

      Giving good ol' Cicero a run for his money...

    • @LawrenceOakheart
      @LawrenceOakheart 3 года назад +25

      Could probably talk Zeus into becoming a good, loving, and very faithful husband to Hera.

    • @raycearcher5794
      @raycearcher5794 3 года назад +2

      It's the opposite of how I play Civ, demand 100 bucks from everyone and go to war if they refuse

    • @Venian_the_wanderer
      @Venian_the_wanderer 3 года назад

      Charisma 69

    • @nsahandler
      @nsahandler 3 года назад +1

      @@raycearcher5794
      Ah! A fan of the American civilisation, I see?
      The actual one - not the one in the game.
      Oh. Well technically.
      Nevermind. That's the end of that comment

  • @caonguyentrinh4974
    @caonguyentrinh4974 2 года назад +369

    Fascinating. Expanding an entire empire without bloodshed and horrible wars.
    Rome with this strategic diplomacy is an absolute glorious victory.

  • @lucasc8972
    @lucasc8972 3 года назад +426

    "can i have your entire land?"
    "what can you give in return?"
    "nothing"
    "deal!
    "

    • @joehemmann1156
      @joehemmann1156 3 года назад +36

      No no, I can give you the privilege of giving me massive sums of money for the rest of your life. You're welcome.

    • @the_rover1
      @the_rover1 3 года назад +7

      this is central bank hellacoptah munee quantity ease doctrine in a nutshell.
      (you don't have to understand what I just said, just some economic talk stuff to irritate non-economy uber biznezz people like myself).

    • @the_rover1
      @the_rover1 3 года назад +3

      @@joehemmann1156 for 21 to 25 years!

    • @a-blivvy-yus
      @a-blivvy-yus 3 года назад +2

      i think my favourite one is "Deal! But if you don't accept, we will attack you!"

    • @the_rover1
      @the_rover1 3 года назад +2

      @@a-blivvy-yus I sometimes pressed 'decline' out of curiosity, just to see what's going to happen. unfortunately, I never was attacked. not right away, at least. AI is dumb like a yard of woodtrail and inconsistent.

  • @firockfinion3326
    @firockfinion3326 3 года назад +1088

    Flavius Julius: "personwhoisgoingtogivemeeverythingtheyownsayswhat?"
    Gaul chieftain: "What?"
    Flavius Julius: "Hah, gottem!"

    • @fun-kun7137
      @fun-kun7137 3 года назад +27

      They would probably have been killed for not speaking latin then robbed but hey Gaulic money is still technically money... I hope

    • @hideouspillow5724
      @hideouspillow5724 3 года назад +3

      @@fun-kun7137 what?

    • @Cwrigz
      @Cwrigz 3 года назад +5

      @@hideouspillow5724 if you know you know

    • @hideouspillow5724
      @hideouspillow5724 3 года назад +17

      @@Cwrigz yeah that tends to be how knowing things works :/

    • @dradamov
      @dradamov 3 года назад +3

      Outstanding move.

  • @gokubeast981
    @gokubeast981 3 года назад +575

    Spiff:Hey can i buy your house?
    Sure here you go.
    2 seconds later
    Spiff:wait why are you on my land!!!
    I haven't gotten the chance to leave?
    spiff: pay me 0_0 👏🏾🤲🏾

  • @nesurame
    @nesurame 3 года назад +109

    Imagine being some captain from Carthage, and some dude from your sworn enemy shows up with 18 grand to fund your early retirement

  • @nick7072
    @nick7072 3 года назад +75

    "This has been the worst trade deal in the history of trade deals, maybe ever"
    -Next Gaul leader, probably

    • @HanaTheSloth
      @HanaTheSloth 2 года назад

      MGGA! Make Gaul Great Again!

  • @yidingliu8663
    @yidingliu8663 3 года назад +475

    "I will wrong you, then you will compensate me with every last city of your empire and a regular payment until the end of days."
    Sounds like a true Brit.

    • @oliver4693
      @oliver4693 3 года назад +15

      Just give me everything you have and you can have some Opium

    • @bensoncheung2801
      @bensoncheung2801 2 года назад +2

      Ghost reply?

    • @ego525
      @ego525 2 года назад +1

      @@bensoncheung2801 probably a deleted comment

    • @connorbarton4308
      @connorbarton4308 Год назад

      Actually fun fact that was a French tactic after the Hatian slaves freed themselves their armada aimed their cannons and demanded compensation for lost property, Haiti has the richest natural resources in the earth but are poor because the debt wasn’t paid for 2012, that being said Britain is heavily involved with satanism so fuck the govs

  • @deamongimli
    @deamongimli 3 года назад +192

    "Your enemies are weak, confused and thoroughly beaten." Truer words have never been written.

  • @tromedlovdrolmai
    @tromedlovdrolmai 3 года назад +160

    Bear in mind that the game doesn't officially become playable until April 29, and that the early access version only goes to turn 25, so actually winning in 12 turns is quite a feat for the long campaign

    • @MrBreaknet
      @MrBreaknet 3 года назад +5

      The SPQR wasn't ready for it.

  • @KraNisOG
    @KraNisOG 3 года назад +152

    "Rome is OP" - literally everyone who ever had war with them.

    • @dubuyajay9964
      @dubuyajay9964 3 года назад +4

      Until later on.

    • @crypt0sFX
      @crypt0sFX 3 года назад +12

      @@dubuyajay9964 They gave citizenship to everyone. If they hadn't had done that, they still would've conquered.

    • @petrmiros9908
      @petrmiros9908 3 года назад +10

      Meh, Partian horse archers strongly disagree

    • @ghostsdragon9222
      @ghostsdragon9222 3 года назад +1

      @@petrmiros9908 and the senate to

    • @darkhobo
      @darkhobo 3 года назад +2

      @@crypt0sFX no. Just no

  • @biggestfanof300
    @biggestfanof300 3 года назад +135

    And here I though the compensation option would be some cool historical mechanic in which you can actually touch on ancient conflicts between Rome and other countries.

    • @skyr4tMusic
      @skyr4tMusic 2 года назад

      Nope more like taking candy from a premature crack baby

  • @justapotato2932
    @justapotato2932 3 года назад +765

    I Came, I Saw, I Spend Money and Auto Resolved.
    - Gaius Julius Ceaser

    • @the_rover1
      @the_rover1 3 года назад +37

      the other way round.
      I came, I demand, I was given lands, armies and hella funds.

    • @oompaloompa817
      @oompaloompa817 3 года назад +4

      @@the_rover1 that's what basically happened

    • @shytendeakatamanoir9740
      @shytendeakatamanoir9740 3 года назад +11

      Veni, vidi, money money

    • @marioisred
      @marioisred 3 года назад

      i came

    • @maximvsdread1610
      @maximvsdread1610 3 года назад +2

      I came, I became famous, I fucked it up and threw it away.
      - Creative Assembly SEGA

  • @wadeking4054
    @wadeking4054 3 года назад +259

    Looks like Rome was built in a day.

  • @user-fq7eh3jz7u
    @user-fq7eh3jz7u 3 года назад +459

    “Art of the Deal: Rome Remastered”

    • @padmanabhanvaidyanathan7182
      @padmanabhanvaidyanathan7182 3 года назад +13

      All other factions: "This is the worst trade deal in the history of trade deals, maybe ever"

    • @HanSolo__
      @HanSolo__ 3 года назад +3

      Yeah, I know Rome and all the shit, but why Colin Farrell is wearing a T-shirt in 350-ish BC?

    • @user-fq7eh3jz7u
      @user-fq7eh3jz7u 3 года назад

      Thank you for all the likes this is my peak of the YT algorithm...for now (cue sinister laugh)

  • @failedleopard3685
    @failedleopard3685 3 года назад +91

    I grew up with this game, and I've never been so insulted to see what you have done with my boy.

    • @dolamrothknight
      @dolamrothknight 3 года назад +4

      lol. im so glad i didnt buy this AGAIN. looks so bad

    • @quarreneverett4767
      @quarreneverett4767 3 года назад +1

      @@dolamrothknight yeah there are some issues

  • @admonkey9
    @admonkey9 3 года назад +44

    I like how the roman commander was "apparently loyal"

  • @MoonsterOP
    @MoonsterOP 3 года назад +310

    Next video: buying the real life Coliseum and making gladiators fight to death

    • @БелянцевНиколай
      @БелянцевНиколай 3 года назад +4

      In Minecraft. Or maybe not.

    • @MG-wx9ib
      @MG-wx9ib 3 года назад +8

      @@БелянцевНиколай Buying the real life Coliseum in minecraft would be somewhat problematic.

    • @БелянцевНиколай
      @БелянцевНиколай 3 года назад +3

      @@MG-wx9ib , My idea is of him organising a Minecraft Coliseum to make people fight each other and suffer for his amusement. It just doesn't seem like he can start this kinda thing IRL, not yet. But yeah, I mentioned Minecraft, because when for example some brutal stuff is being talked about , like killing each other , in this case Coliseum , is mentioned and you don't wanna get something bad for it, like joke of FBI watching you, or maybe social media platform unironically deleting a comment, there could be added "in Minecraft" in the end .

    • @HanSolo__
      @HanSolo__ 3 года назад +2

      Can we pls take a moment in silence and appreciate that Spiff will make the Gladiators come back to the sanctuary of Fight, Death, and Glory?

  • @karltan700
    @karltan700 3 года назад +256

    Julius Caesar: Cant wait to be born and redo my famous battle of Ale...
    Flavius: No.

    • @mihaylomitsch9414
      @mihaylomitsch9414 3 года назад

      That‘s what I am trying to do now in my campaign

  • @Hannah_Em
    @Hannah_Em 3 года назад +169

    Devs: "Shall we pay bugfinders to make sure we ship our game bug free?"
    Devs to devs: "Nahhhhhh, let's just let Spiffing Brit have early access for an exploit video"

    • @gustavchambert7072
      @gustavchambert7072 3 года назад +26

      Thing is, it's not even a bug. A bug is when a flaw in the code means that certain actions causes the game to glitch and do unintended things. These usually cant be foreseen and need to be tested to be found and fixed.
      This is much worse, since it's just a poorly thought-through feature that was not properly implemented. They clearly did no work whatsoever to make sure that the AI could use the new feature. They just put it in the game, but clearly did not bother to put in any restrictions on what the AI will accept. This is not a bug, it's just lazy incompetence.

    • @PaulZeroSolis
      @PaulZeroSolis 3 года назад +31

      @@gustavchambert7072 It's likely actually a bug from the fix to stop the nonsense that was
      "AI Requests: Please do not attack.
      AI Demands: Accept or we will attack."
      And then upon accepting it, the very next turn they attack.

    • @killerbee.13
      @killerbee.13 3 года назад +7

      @@gustavchambert7072 Bugs can definitely be the result of incompetence.

    • @krankarvolund7771
      @krankarvolund7771 3 года назад +8

      @@gustavchambert7072 Yeah it's lazy incompetence, because they did not thought that someone would demand regions to compensate for past grievances ^^
      Oh and that's still a beta press version, so they're probably correcting that before the release, or a little after, it's not a big deal really ^^

    • @rorschach1985ify
      @rorschach1985ify 3 года назад +6

      Yeah calling an exploited feature from a pre-release game "incompetence" is ignoring how they purposely let play testers do this shit at all so they can test it out before it's official release. The main issue with Compensation is it working at all at the start of the campaign when all factions start off neutral so therefore a fix should be made to make it useless at the start until you go to war and get a faction to make a ceasefire and make it less likely to get compensation unless you are stronger than them.

  • @eddymercan7487
    @eddymercan7487 2 года назад +182

    "Less bugs"
    "Improved features"
    Aged like milk lol

  • @InvaderMEEN
    @InvaderMEEN 3 года назад +76

    The Spiffing Brit: *I'm going to make you an offer **_you cannot refuse_*

  • @conkeithador7218
    @conkeithador7218 3 года назад +107

    All factions: 'exist'
    House of Julii: "and I took that personally"

    • @siegfried1422
      @siegfried1422 3 года назад +17

      House of Julii: "and i took that"

    • @CalgarGTX
      @CalgarGTX 3 года назад +1

      You were supposed to say 'it's free real estate'

    • @conkeithador7218
      @conkeithador7218 3 года назад

      @@CalgarGTX whoopsy 🙃

  • @medhathobo
    @medhathobo 3 года назад +316

    Ah yes. The AI has infinite gold. The AI cheats, then we exploit.

    • @gabrielho1874
      @gabrielho1874 3 года назад +16

      So the Al is illegal cheating and we're going to find exploits for cheating legally, correct?

    • @domaxltv
      @domaxltv 3 года назад +13

      I'm pretty sure that you can get an infinite amount of debt... Only thing that happens is you can't build or train units... Or was that just the case in medieval 2, I don't know

    • @sauromatae9728
      @sauromatae9728 3 года назад +27

      @@gf11511 no. diplomacy money is generated out of thin air.

    • @MrGhosta5
      @MrGhosta5 3 года назад +9

      if you play on very hard the ai gets to cheat even harder letting you exploit even more gold out of them.

    • @timon6759
      @timon6759 3 года назад +3

      @@gabrielho1874 yeah basically

  • @hassanrafiq9930
    @hassanrafiq9930 3 года назад +109

    Other nations : Have a settlement
    Spiff: Is for me? 👉👈

  • @nikolaizavisic5023
    @nikolaizavisic5023 3 года назад +16

    Egypt: "We are the mightiest, we have chariots!"
    Macedon: "Haha! We have phalanx!"
    Carthage: "Haha! We have mighty elephants!"
    Spiffing Brit: "Haha! I have diplomats!"

  • @justintr4888
    @justintr4888 3 года назад +61

    I'm just imagining the devs watching this and thinking "Oh... Oh no. Oh we gotta fix that."

    • @runrundave
      @runrundave 3 года назад +3

      @DanRage47 I see it for me to pay. No longer can request it

    • @corwyncalc4329
      @corwyncalc4329 3 года назад +5

      @DanRage47 Yea i was looking for that. Sad, only reason I downloaded the game

    • @jbussa
      @jbussa 3 года назад +5

      so instead of fixing it, they removed it. lol

  • @craigwck7626
    @craigwck7626 3 года назад +77

    "This has been the best trade deal in the history of trade deals, maybe ever"
    -Some Roman guy.

    • @irishwristwatch2487
      @irishwristwatch2487 3 года назад +11

      Sounds like Julius Trumpus

    • @CalgarGTX
      @CalgarGTX 3 года назад +5

      @@irishwristwatch2487 Smallus Handus Orangus

  • @cmitchell6849
    @cmitchell6849 3 года назад +72

    I love how the AI literally cheated to settle the compensation

    • @danielb270
      @danielb270 3 года назад +5

      Its just how the deals work in TW, One faction gains the agreed amount, the other one loses it. And the money could go into negatives (at least in the old ones)

    • @gerardjagroo
      @gerardjagroo 3 года назад

      C Mitchell I don't think they cheated. They borrowed the money to Spiff and went hopelessly and irretrievably in the red.

  • @thewingedporpoise
    @thewingedporpoise 3 года назад +38

    Spiff: "all the other youtubers are playing it how it's meant to be played"
    Jon MATN: "time to play Dacia without training any units"

    • @ThatOnePlaythrough
      @ThatOnePlaythrough 2 года назад +7

      Jon, the master of making games needlessly harder.

    • @thewingedporpoise
      @thewingedporpoise 2 года назад +7

      @@ThatOnePlaythrough and sometimes it's intentional!

  • @dingus_doofus
    @dingus_doofus 3 года назад +418

    I'm sure this is patched by now or will be soon, but what a hilarious broken diplomacy AI.

    • @sammosaurusrex
      @sammosaurusrex 2 года назад +78

      It’s especially hilarious if you’ve played the original Rome TW - there diplomacy is totally useless. Factions will practically always attack, never accept ceasefires unless they’re completely thrashed or you don’t share a land border, and will straight up violate alliances if you don’t have strong enough border garrisons - alliances that were basically useless anyways, since even if you offer them money your allies will tell you to get fucked if you ever ask for their assistance in a war effort.
      The new diplomacy was meant to be a (needed) fix, where breaking treaties has consequences for how factions view you, and you can build sturdier, trusting relationships with allies. Too bad it didn’t even really fix it (allies will still violate treaties with glee) and, apparently, overcorrected factions into accepting stupid bad deals

    • @MizterMoonshine
      @MizterMoonshine 2 года назад +25

      @@sammosaurusrex That is why I prefer Rome 2. With Rome 1 you are always in permanent war with all factions. There is no diplomacy.

    • @bensoncheung2801
      @bensoncheung2801 2 года назад

      144p 👍

    • @alexmuller6752
      @alexmuller6752 2 года назад

      @@MizterMoonshine well, preferring rome 2 seems like curing your itching toe by amputating a leg

    • @MrArtless1
      @MrArtless1 2 года назад +4

      @@sammosaurusrex have you ever seen a RTW speedrun? They all abuse Diplomacy like this.

  • @morojkiller5418
    @morojkiller5418 3 года назад +72

    Not even the magic potion can save Asterix from this one.

  • @geagesgaming
    @geagesgaming 3 года назад +63

    "There's no way they'll give us the gold" .... Oh Spiff, they allllways give us the gold

  • @cabooseplaysmusic
    @cabooseplaysmusic 3 года назад +55

    You know Spiff is having fun when he’s actually genuinely laughing for once

  • @wes9451
    @wes9451 2 года назад +31

    Your ability to create a massive empire that spans the known world all while being mostly pacifist is amazing. All in 12 dam turns. I honestly didn't even think you would find that many people in 12 turns.

  • @tylerwood8710
    @tylerwood8710 3 года назад +29

    I have nothing to add; I just want to help the algorithm. Laughed from nearly the first moment. Your sense of humor is excellent.

  • @mikaelberg4304
    @mikaelberg4304 3 года назад +37

    So THIS is why Carthage refused to send Hannibal reinforcements. History makes so much more sense now! Thank you Spiff and creative assembly! I finally understand :D

  • @Chiefkid20
    @Chiefkid20 3 года назад +17

    *Slaps Carthage*
    "This baby salts itself."

  • @maxhalabi7611
    @maxhalabi7611 3 года назад +63

    You turned into Italian Mansa Musa in 3 turns lmao

    • @adrianbundy3249
      @adrianbundy3249 3 года назад +5

      To be fair, I think Caesar was stupidly wealthy enough, even compared to Musa, so he became Caesar, like the game suggest, fits quite well enough.

    • @dubuyajay9964
      @dubuyajay9964 3 года назад

      Explain please.

    • @adrianbundy3249
      @adrianbundy3249 3 года назад

      @@dubuyajay9964 Mansa Musa you mean? One of the supposed richest men in all of history, but I am one to press X to doubt, but of those in the highest bracket of pre-modern times, he was probably one of the people who could flaunt it the most. He was an African warlord who had a kingdom, and once on a pilgrimage he had lines for like a year of gold and servants, and all manner of splendor, that shocked the europeans and foreigners he came across, with fabulous tales of his wealth. Perhaps he was even one of perhaps the top 5 wealthiest people alive in his day.
      But consider the other options. Emperor's, or like Caesar here that I mention. Mansa Musa got a lot of his wealth from his near total control of his kingdom, which he could take the wealth he generated from as his, because in the large sense, it was. But what if another leader like Caesar has the same ego, and decided to build up such a procession of wealth? I have no doubt they could have managed something similar. But their drug was more in power and authority, and wealth secondary. Though, they did amass all the wealth possible, but not necessarily to all be carried around like that.
      It does remind me a bit of the pharoah's here. The wealth and power of the pharaoh's built the pyramids, and the greatest one who died and had that pyramid... That is a symbol perhaps, of how they might even eclipse both. But it isn't seen as the same wealth of Mansa Musa, because it was not an 'everlasting line of gold, servants, and splendor'. Which is a really, really inaccurate way to figure out who exactly is the most wealthy individuals in history. But he certainly was one of the ones who could perhaps show it off the best, and left a lot of people with gaping mouths. While others simply made the marvels from their wealth, so that people gaped at the marvels themselves, from their wealth. Understand the difference I am getting at?

    • @dubuyajay9964
      @dubuyajay9964 3 года назад

      @@adrianbundy3249 Oh yes, ty. I forgot who Mansa Musa was.

    • @adrianbundy3249
      @adrianbundy3249 3 года назад

      @@dubuyajay9964 Np. If I come off as crazy, it is only because I was once pressured into a debate with a couple of people who were absolutely certain he was the richest man ever alive. I happened to think some others were, and in the end, I did a bit of research, reflection, and in the end rather a too long and too passionate debate... And now I seem to have an automatic reflex to want to put things into perspective anytime I see his name brought up. It's a bit silly, perhaps childish, I know, and even more so, few will even care, even those who care about history.

  • @trygveplaustrum4634
    @trygveplaustrum4634 3 года назад +46

    *Welcome to the world of RTW speed runs*

    • @themitri8519
      @themitri8519 3 года назад

      i'm pretty sure there's a speedrun where someone finished the original game in like 5 turns or something.

  • @KingKing-cz6xh
    @KingKing-cz6xh 3 года назад +29

    I really love how these companies just give u early access and are like “alright break this shit”

    • @Firehawk376
      @Firehawk376 3 года назад +4

      Yeah, they have to know how this is going to end when they hand early access passes to Spiff or, if they're really crazy, Josh from Let's Game It Out, and yet they do it anyways.

    • @bfufhryrrhtjhxbdgkjgutitjh7877
      @bfufhryrrhtjhxbdgkjgutitjh7877 3 года назад +1

      They do it to bug test it

  • @rochenmanta838
    @rochenmanta838 2 года назад +31

    26:00
    egypt be like:
    we don't want to settle past grievances and give you our stuff
    We just want to give you our stuff and keep the grievances

  • @tzardnickolasthelitromanov
    @tzardnickolasthelitromanov 3 года назад +29

    "Goddamit, Spiff, now they'll patch it"

    • @kcried1081
      @kcried1081 3 года назад +2

      Hahahahaha, my thoughts exactly lol 😂

    • @dubuyajay9964
      @dubuyajay9964 3 года назад

      But how long will it take though? Attila still has unfixed code in it!

    • @tadferd4340
      @tadferd4340 3 года назад

      @@dubuyajay9964 They fixed High Elf Mage economy exploit and Skaven Warlord economy.

  • @garrylove8955
    @garrylove8955 3 года назад +36

    "Today we're going to be taking their land and making them pay us for it"
    Plantation era Irish people: yeah, sounds like British behaviour

    • @dubuyajay9964
      @dubuyajay9964 3 года назад

      Indian From The British Raj: They took us over-FOR CURRY AND TEA LEAVES!

    • @garrylove8955
      @garrylove8955 3 года назад

      @@dubuyajay9964 I've such respect for india. Y'all got fucked with the same stick they used on us. Everything that bitch queen victoria did to us Winston Churchill did to ye

    • @dubuyajay9964
      @dubuyajay9964 3 года назад

      @@garrylove8955 I'm not Indian, but yeah.

  • @yobgodababua1862
    @yobgodababua1862 3 года назад +65

    Oh my, when the AI offered their new city without you even asking... Perfectly Balanced.

    • @Wistbacka
      @Wistbacka 3 года назад +9

      I got a demand from one faction saying I have to pay tribute: 100 denari to per turn for 3 turns. Their offer: accept it we will attack along with paying me 380 denari.
      I was like.... Yes please!

    • @Unelith
      @Unelith 3 года назад +2

      @@Wistbacka After all, they didn't have formulas to calculate interest back in those times

  • @GreatZarquon
    @GreatZarquon 2 года назад +28

    I've never seen a Total War Any% speedrun before, laughing so hard!

  • @Kemot300
    @Kemot300 3 года назад +21

    I see sir Spiif is playing like a real ancient roman.

  • @Kenichitr
    @Kenichitr 3 года назад +21

    "How broken is this game?"
    "Yes"

  • @SUPERNOCH
    @SUPERNOCH 3 года назад +49

    "Easy peezy lemon squeezy, we now own the entirety of Spain"

    • @the_rover1
      @the_rover1 3 года назад +6

      hippity hoppity,
      the entire known world of antique
      is now my property
      🤭

  • @danz3835
    @danz3835 2 года назад +39

    Remembers me of Total War Troy where I was trading one wheat for basically the entire stock of resources the AI had(including 12K wheat). What are they doing when designing these games

    • @Kalron9
      @Kalron9 2 года назад +2

      They're probably playing the game as intended, maybe pushing the boundaries with army composition but idk. I'm not a game dev... idk what they do.
      But... I play games as intended. I find a lot of joy watching this guy break every single game he touches though lol

    • @mertarican5456
      @mertarican5456 2 года назад

      İt is like testing a car with climbing on top of the roof and jumping then asking the why it was undrivable.

  • @nick3xtremegaming212
    @nick3xtremegaming212 3 года назад +33

    god this exploit is going to get patched out real quick lmao, its so game shattering

  • @floridaball4896
    @floridaball4896 3 года назад +6

    Spiff: makes Gaul give rome non-existent money
    Spiff: profit

  • @sup3rshockwav317
    @sup3rshockwav317 3 года назад +8

    I receive: Your empire
    You receive: All past grievances forgotten

  • @poisonblood696
    @poisonblood696 3 года назад +27

    So profound that a game called Rome Total war, would allow the Romans to be over powered.

  • @WS-bl6ll
    @WS-bl6ll 3 года назад +29

    "Flavius Julius the smoothest man who ever lived"
    🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
    ok im subbing 😅💪🤣

  • @hypersouls1316
    @hypersouls1316 3 года назад +27

    Ai faction:
    "So we're just supposed to hand you all of our land and golf"
    Spif:
    "Yeah"
    Ai faction:
    "Yeah seems fair to me"

  • @lindleya
    @lindleya 3 года назад +10

    "Hi, nice to meet you, you've annoyed me, so give me your cities. Now you're annoyed cos I have your cities, so have some money. I don't like your armies hanging around these cities, give me money."

  • @Shiroyasha2397
    @Shiroyasha2397 3 года назад +17

    This is what the history books won't tell you...

  • @benmohatun
    @benmohatun 3 года назад +6

    I seriously burst out laughing. I've NEVER seen a more hilarious exploit.

  • @coyotefire69420
    @coyotefire69420 3 года назад +6

    Sweet Jesus you just did a speedrun of Rome. Well done Spiff, well done.

  • @avisachdeva8716
    @avisachdeva8716 Год назад +7

    i love how he plays it normally one time after 17 minutes

  • @mustlovedragons8047
    @mustlovedragons8047 3 года назад +3

    Spiff: "...The completely utterly stupidly overpowered horse archer run."
    Genghis Khan: *copies notes furiously*

  • @ecos889
    @ecos889 3 года назад +16

    Rome total war Karen edition. She want compensation for merely existing and when you do that she wants compensation for the fact that you compensated them.

  • @anhhoanginh4763
    @anhhoanginh4763 3 года назад +9

    "Diplomacy is improved" they said

  • @johnirby8847
    @johnirby8847 3 года назад +42

    This is an actual "broken" part of the game. Your video on Scythia was just how Scythia was supposed to be played except you went arcade mode.

  • @kchong4269
    @kchong4269 3 года назад +11

    I really like the way you say "sit back, relax and have a warm cup of tea" :DDD

  • @normiedeathsquad40
    @normiedeathsquad40 Год назад +2

    22:00 my man re-enacted the treaty of Versailles.

  • @Gazcan
    @Gazcan Год назад +6

    Who would have guess that after all the struggle the Romans had to endure, that they only needed to ask nicely.

  • @maxb.7829
    @maxb.7829 3 года назад +9

    This is literally just the !TRADE OFFER! meme as a game.

  • @terpy663
    @terpy663 2 года назад +5

    Here i thought Caeser broke the roman system, but he couldn't even dream of breaking this many systems at once.

  • @MrResidenteviladdict
    @MrResidenteviladdict 2 года назад +11

    This plays out like a skit.
    Romans: “hey you insulted us, give us all your cities except your capital and 877 gold!”
    Gauls: “That’s outrageous! We’ve done nothing THAT bad. How about instead, give you 877 gold AND all of our cities except our capital?”
    Romans: “You shrewd bastard; you’ve got a deal!”

  • @avail2114
    @avail2114 Год назад +2

    This pleases total war speedrunners world wide. From the 40 second Britannia victory to paying thousands of dollars to walk the Egyptian out of numidia. This pleases us greatly

  • @christophercappiello9788
    @christophercappiello9788 3 года назад +1

    Horse archer only was my favorite back in the day. Or Numidian cavalry only. You didn't even have to win sieges cause you could just sit outside the city with an army half the size of the garrison, they would come out to fight you and you'd just destroy them...

  • @rjhogan07
    @rjhogan07 3 года назад +7

    Ah yes the classic “you pay me to take your stuff” exploit

  • @gggiiillllllyyy
    @gggiiillllllyyy 3 года назад +20

    Did the spiffing brit just hit the speed run strats for this game?

  • @whiterosecicero4802
    @whiterosecicero4802 3 года назад +9

    Using gold to get power: Happy marcus licinius crassus noises.

  • @bubyCZ
    @bubyCZ 3 года назад +1

    This is the RTW RM version of:
    Accept or we Attack
    Please, do not attack ...

  • @nomooon
    @nomooon 3 года назад +1

    You didn't send a diplomat; you sent a mafia mobster! "I will make them an offer they cannot refuse...."

  • @MrGatonegroish
    @MrGatonegroish 3 года назад +3

    4:49
    "C-compensation?" *nervously sweats in Weimar Republic*

  • @markmuilenburg1673
    @markmuilenburg1673 3 года назад +8

    Darnit. These coffee drinkers have patched this one.
    Well, onto horse archers...

  • @MrAsmoLp
    @MrAsmoLp 3 года назад +6

    devs be like "WAIT A SEC! Whats that"

  • @VetyBurr
    @VetyBurr 3 года назад +1

    Pro tip: if you want to demand a city in diplomacy, check where the city locations are... I made a mistake when fighting against the Gauls and they asked for a ceasefire, i demanded a city in return, what i wanted was the city closest to me so i can immediately reinforce it, but i accidentally chose the one on the literal edge of the map, and it got besieged immediately after i ended the turn

  • @Suiberis
    @Suiberis 3 года назад +1

    You should see if the diplomacy bug I used to exploit works. Basically, if you find any settlement with too high of a population count, you can have a diplomat give it to an enemy faction.
    The settlement will then have your garisson evacuate it but the settlement will be empty, allowing you to reoccuoy ans exterminate the populace, thereby gaining gold, public order and a buffer time for you to build more upgrades.
    You can also set taxes to very high for maximum income per turn. This strategy snowballs in the mid to late game since you can do this to all your settlements in a single turn, thereby gaining up to hundreds of thousands of denarii per turn and eliminating squalor and discontent while you're at it.
    TLDR: Routinely surrender cities over to your enemies, exterminate your former citizens and you will remain rich, powerful and the people will love you for using their dead family's fortunes to upgrade the infrastructure while allowing you to tax them at the highest bracket.
    Who knew routine genocide would be so profitable?

  • @HighAdmiral
    @HighAdmiral 3 года назад +4

    Wow! You must have Rick from Pawn Stars negotiating for you!
    Gauls: "I'd like to sell this 100000 dollar painting"
    Rick the Roman: "I'm taking a huge risk, I have to frame it, I'll offer you a bucket of water and a pencil"

  • @Sich97
    @Sich97 3 года назад +9

    23:03 And that's how WW2 started kids

  • @justjoshingya504
    @justjoshingya504 Год назад +3

    Guess rome was built in a day

  • @connoradamson2846
    @connoradamson2846 8 месяцев назад +1

    They say Rome wasn’t built in a day, but you came awfully close.