Martha Beck: The Way of Integrity & Why You Should STOP Doing What You’re “Supposed to”
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- Опубликовано: 5 авг 2024
- Martha Beck wants you to STOP doing what you’re “supposed to” - and start living your truth. Her new book “The Way of Integrity” is a loving reminder that if you want to be happy, you’d better walk your talk. She says, “Integrity is the cure for unhappiness, period.”
In this MarieTV, you’ll learn how to access your intuition, what happens to your body when you lie, the tell-tale symptoms you’re NOT living your truth, plus the four essential things every human being longs for. Watch now to learn why you must speak and live your truth- even if it ruffles some feathers - if you want to be happy.
Dr. Martha Beck is a bestselling author, life coach, and speaker who helps people achieve personal and professional success. She’s written nine nonfiction books including “Finding Your North Star” and “Expecting Adam”, and has been a monthly columnist for The Oprah Magazine for seventeen years. Beck is a mother of three and holds three degrees - a BA, MA, and Ph.D. - all from Harvard University.
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Ready to live your truth? Jump to these highlights with Martha Beck:
2:19 - The only lasting cure to unhappiness.
5:13 - What happens to your body when you lie.
7:09 - How to access your intuition.
9:15 - The FIRST self-help book ever written!
11:25 - What science knows about “awakening” and how to tell when it happens to you.
12:37 - Why you should STOP doing what you’re “supposed to.”
15:20 - 6 tell-tale signs you’re out of alignment.
17:31 - The popular sex tip that can actually make you succesful in all areas of your life.
21:00 - Why Martha ignored her doctors’ advice and “threw her life away.”
25:04 - The 4 things every human yearns for.
27:30 - How to stop self-sabotage for good.
34:03 - Why big leaps don’t work - and the power of one degree turns.
37:45 - How to live a life of integrity.
What’s next? Watch more inspiring interviews here: ruclips.net/p/PL4D5277E0F92106D2
“Stopping because things get difficult”. A sign your not aligned? Why is this a sign? If you have a passion for something, it brings you joy, you are gifted at it and it brings others joy sometimes doing that passion has difficult moments. All this “advice” feels vague. She seems well intended but not completely practical from what I heard in the interview. I get being stuck in the “people pleasing” rut but unless you choose to live in the woods and forage for your own food you have to please people to some extent to earn a living.
T7777 777yiiiiii
I loved, loved, LOVED this interview! ❤️
Thank you both for such a great discussion around the single most important aspect of our lives: that of our alignment with our deepest truth. 🙏
“Out of all Of the strategies and skills that I’ve ever learned the ones that actually work are the ones that help people see where they have abandoned their own sense of Truth and followed some other one’s set of directions.”
~Martha Beck
“It’s better to die telling your truth than to live without it.”
~ Martha Beck
For this past decade I have been literally silenced (under threat), and isolated, for being the ‘holder of information’ regarding the lies and deceptions of certain spiritual teachers.
I truly felt this was some thing I had to do…and because of that, it felt as though I was slowly dying. This is no exaggeration.
In February if 2019 I began speaking...at first with the names of the teachers protected. This was very confusing as the story was complex.
Now, as I begin to bring myself more and more into alignment with ‘me’ (the opposite of what certain patriarchal teachings would have) I am feeling much lighter and with a ‘wholeness’ that is finally beginning to come to the foreground.
A bit of my tale can be found here:
www.IntegrityInTruth.com
❤️🌷🙏🔥
I agree to an extent with not doing things you don't want to, but how would a person cultivate discipline if they didn't have practice sticking with something and "just doing it"?
What if you don’t know what your true nature is anymore? What do you do then? What if you really don’t know what makes you happy?
I am currently reading Martha’s book. I have been in therapy for four years and have read around 40 books on all subjects regarding abuse, codependency, and others searching for my truth and authenticity. “The Way of Integrity “ has given me my “Aha” moment. It just makes so much sense as a way to cut through so much confusion and focus on the most important element in living the good, honest life. At age 75, I am filled with hope and excitement for my remaining years. Thank you, Martha!
Thanks for giving me hope. My current role model of a mom is 72, apathetic, and has dementia. I need to hear more stories of people excited about life in their 70s and beyond! That's why I follow Sassy Gran on youtube. She's in her 90s and loves her life!
"If it isn't working, don't do it harder!" Love it!
Emilia - Thanks for sharing. Fantastic advice!! - Antoinette
This made me laugh out loud! That was me all 2018-2019 🤣
Good one 👍 ty
Don't sell your soul to buy your future..
The minute we leave our truth our body fails us.. So true
"Without exception, we are all abandoning our true nature to serve some version of culture." If there's anything this pandemic has done, it is providing the gift of introspection and a deeper level of self awareness.
I can't help but think that there may, possibly, every 100 years, be some exceptions? Gag me with a spoon !
You explained this really well! 😄
Thanks for the great points about what had the pandemic has taught us.
I'll remember this for next time!
You really nailed it. Thank you for wording it so well. I find I am letting a lot of so-called friendships go, because the way people express themselves about where they stand on masking or not, distancing or not, injections or not, is so telling.
Nope, did not work for me. I have spent my entire life being introspective. The pandemic restrictions robbed me of my freedom to move to Europe where my heart and soul belong. Was blocked by closed borders. So, the pandemic crushed my FREEDOM-one of the 4 basic needs!
To anyone who starts watching this and thinks "I no longer have anything that I yearn for"... listen to your own voice. Something has forced you to silence it. But it's still there.
Wow..wrote my thoughts precisely.. feel strongly is a concept so timely too. Wouldn't have been recognised for how powerful this truth is until now. THE GREAT Awakening is real.
“In the quiet of the night, what do you yearn for?” Excellent. That is the teaching of Conscience, which cannot be overridden.
I came from a specific background where the expectations of you were overbearing. And that's an understatement.
When I walked away from that, for about 6 months, I intensively questioned every habit I had. I asked myself
Do I really like this activity?
Do I feel fulfilled by it?
If I don't like doing it; why do I do it?
Is it an obligation? A duty?
Am I doing it because I think it's what is expected of me?
Is that expectation real or in my head?
If it's real, is it reasonable?
If it's not my duty; what would happen if I dropped the activity?
Will anybody be hurt?
If I wasn't here to fulfill their expectations, could they carry on regardless?
I asked questions like this, over and over again, day after day while paying attention to many activities in my life. I then started to drop anything that wasn't absolutely my duty and that I felt was not serving me. And then, one day.... KABOOM!
I suddenly got hit by this feeling, totally out of the blue, of " oh, this is what it feels like to be me ". I don't recall ever experiencing that feeling. It was followed by a period of daily bliss.
It felt like I had arrived home; it felt like I had met myself. I had no idea this was going to happen; I just was tired of being a people pleaser and was afraid that I would live out my life in others' expectations and subscribing to the ideals and dreams of others. This discovering of myself floored me.
That’s awesome! Thanks for sharing it
Beautiful, thx for sharing! Turning 49 & why I waited this long ... to be sure? they really not getting any more of me.
Sounds like a good story and approach which you could put in a book for the rest of us.
This is brilliant by example. Thankyou.
:) :) :)
The quote is: "Its better to be hated for what you are than loved for what you are not".
Brilliant! Where did you find this quote?
story of my life
@@cynwes9994 it’s Andre Gide
Wonderful quote👏🏻👏🏻
Another one that I love is "if you have to cripple yourself to get love, it is not love you are getting"
Never wanted children I'm 57 never had children I think it was the best decision I've ever made in my entire life I moved out of the state another best decision I never followed the norm and I'm so grateful that I didn't follow The herd
My biggest insight was that once you act in integrity with YOU you finally reach freedom!
The process works in cycles. External freedom isn't a constant but we are always on the path to choose with what we believe and witness the result of that. The message of freedom speaks more to that you can be your full self, without needed validation, even when we have the struggles and judgements coming at us from other people. That eventually the environment will also change and we will meet the right people for us by going through Dante's Purgatory.. the more we live in alignment with out intuition. Freedom, but not without some struggles.
So true. I've gotten physically sick when things are chronically not in alignment for me
"We all only yearn for the same four things: peace, freedom, joy and love" - yes!
This idea that your health deteriorates when you’re out of integrity has become my life’s work. Thank you for all the ah-has!
I love how you highlight the body telling you when something is out of integrity. I've found that our body is one of the most underutilized ally.
What really makes me unhappy is to think how unhappy I am.
If I do not think, but just be and do, I feel better. I love to walk in the city or in nature and just observe. I think that it is my favourite hobby. Especially I love early mornings. I do not wake up very early every morning, but today I did. I went to the nearest grocery to buy croissants before my remote meeting. I loved to see the city wakening up! I loved the birds singing. I loved the light of the rising sun. I loved smells and noices of the morning city. I loved the warm fresh croussants that they just took from the owen when I went to the grocery! I loved to see how workers have started their day. And I wondered how many mornings I‘ve missed only because I have slept.
Hello how are you doing 😊😊😊
Love this
I remember 12 years ago when I was deeply unhappy, reading a book about happiness. I don't remember the title but it said that same thing: it's all about integrity. I was doing a job I hated, in a relationship that was long past its sell-by date and realized I had to change everything.
Listening to your story about “the defective little boy” touched me. I’m a Boston trained lawyer but I had taught school in the South Bronx. It was there that I felt the most integrity; there was no status there. I purchased ‘The Way of Integrity’ just now in Audible. Thank you.
Those kids can have a role model in you, they cannot otherwise have.
When words of encouragement from a stranger make you cry.
Martha Beck is The Bomb!! 😍💝
That small steps work! I’m 66 widowed and struggling with finding my truth.
Best of success to you.
The same! Degree after degree thinking I would be happier, a marriage thinking I would be happier... Now divorced and studying energies, astrology and human behaviour predictability in a much peaceful state! But still a work in progress...a girl has to pay the bills!
It's about the same way for me. I'm in a marriage that is probably too far gone, advancing my education and still feeling like it's not all right
"Just a one degree turn towards your truth", Love it.
Peace, freedom, joy, love = integrity ... = who we are.
33:33. It’s better to Die telling your Truth than to live without it.
I’ve been cleaning houses since 2001 but I’ve always been very passionate about astrology and I know down deep what I’m doing for a living ,I’m completely not in alignment with . My son is grown and out of the house with a place of his own now and I really know I’d be safe taking a leap of faith and becoming an professional astrologist . I seriously think I’m having a midlife crisis but it’s either now or never .
Go for it! 👍
I can relate to this so much. I have recently been experiencing a lot of anxiety and I really feel that it’s my body telling me something needs to change. I quit my job almost two weeks ago because I decided after almost 30 years in a certain career that I just don’t want to do it anymore. I wasn’t engaged in the work anymore. I have no clue what I am going to do next, but I just knew I had to stop doing what I was doing. Definitely will be buying this book.
Good for you! If you can afford some time off to explore and unwind, do so! I did the same thing a while back and knee-jerked back to safety of a similar job. It takes time to shed that identity and you deserve to find your best self! Best of luck and peace ✌🏽
Best of luck in getting there.
You needed the change and clearly there are a few of us craving happiness 🇦🇺💕
Parallel lives. I can relate. I found the book Designing Your Life by Stanford University professors helps you to make prototypes of what you want to do.
I'd love to hear how this turned out!
@@stillbren I’m in a much better job, same field, but I did take a break for a year and did a different job. It sucked and I realized that I belong in my original field. lol I am off of anxiety meds, so that’s a bonus. I’m overall much happier now.
This is hitting in all the right ways. Almost in tears watching this. I hope it’s okay to say given that it’s the internet and anything can sound creepy, but I just flipping love you, Marie. Thanks for bringing these amazing and inspiring people and for being one yourself. This and your interview with Elizabeth Gilbert are two of my favorite videos on RUclips.
Yup. That's two of us.
I love that one too. So many people with rich content.
Lennon - So glad you enjoyed the interview with Martha. Yes, she's totally amazing and we love Elizabeth Gilbert as well. -Antoinette
As a woman with HF autism, I don’t lie, especially when I’m asked questions like this: how are you? I take that question literally and give explanations people don’t wan to hear... I don’t want to change this about myself... people tended to tell me, you have to answer;”I’m great” bc you attract what you invoke... THAT sentence bother me to the core... NO I don’t want to lie. Lol
I'm much the same about honesty, if my truth makes others uncomfortable. I'm sorry but I won't sacrifice my integrity for their discomfort.
In the UK we have some flexibility now - it's acceptable not to answer "I'm fine" anymore. No-one wants a life story but when I'm tired, I say that I'm feeling tired, for example.
So uplifting! I love the: "I threw my old life away - it sucked" LOL. What a way to reframe that her NEW life is 100% better - living on point with integrity. It's never too late to change your life around!!
For me today it was very inspiring to hear about the "1 degree turns". As a perfectionist, I tend to want to push myself harder, which often leads to me just giving up and not doing a thing. Slow changes will get me there, before I know it I will be leading the life I want. "Pushing through" doesn't work, you will just end up eating eggs :)
Anna - Yes! Slow changes make a huge difference in life. Stop to smell the roses is a beautiful thing! - Antoinette
@@TeamForleo see fake Marie account above
I am a certified life coach for four years now. I enjoyed the show and will take away being my true self. I am going to be my true self
Whoa. This is one for the ages. So true.. Wished I saw this 6 years ago when, despite my success, I was failing myself. "it's better to die telling your truth than to live without it" #killer
'It's better to die telling your truth than to live without it'
I love this! But I also love that you don’t place ads on any of your videos. It’s a little difference that makes it feel like you truly care about your audience.
I am 43 yo and I have started to ask myself what I enjoy doing.
I started a difficult and painful journey, but totally worth it.
Starting to listen to my body, its warnings, its shouts that I have been avoiding for do long. I felt purposeless, and I was trying harder, learning, studying what I supposed to, instead what I loved to.
Yep, same age. Right there with you.
Another one here.
I cannot express how deeply this resonated with me. I can literally feel myself shrink every time I am in a situation not in sync with my values. Much love 💕
What a great gift to have that signal! 😄
We're so glad that it resonated with you in such a powerful way, Ashita. We see you. - Heather
When I learned the power and self-growth of saying NO, everything changed for the better ;-)
I spent a beautiful time watching this video!!!
The Way of Integrity!! ❤️🙏
Anybody else totally ready to live THIS way??! 🙂
Peace, joy, freedom & love - no one yearns for anything else.
"If it isn't working, don't do it harder" wow! This is soo powerful and something I definitely needed a reminder on! Thank you beautiful ladies for the wisdom! 🙏🏻💞
I am still LMAO (quietly) about this piece of advice! I have been screwing up on the same project for a while now and got this!
That’s the 9 fruit of the spirits - peace, joy, love, kindness, patience etc
I consider myself very well versed in self help, popular psychology meta physics, all the social sciences etc but I confess, I have never heard of Martha Beck. Now I have and it was fun! Thank you for an excellent interview.
You're so welcome, Licia. Thanks for watching it- Heather
Insight: 1 degree change Action: shower every night. I think doing this will help me relax, wind down off electronics, and help me sleep. All things that have taken a hit with covid-life.
You were born to SUCCEED in EVERY area of life! 🙌🏼😃
For some reason, I didn't think I was going to like this episode; boy was I ever wrong. Martha is a complete joy.
This hit me like a brick. I instantly felt an internal lightness after watching this. Thank you.
My main takeaway is the idea of 1% shift. What a relief. Thank you, Martha and Marie. Can’t wait to read the book. I’ve read Martha’s other books and they are all gems.
I couldn't really think of any one thing that jumped out at me right when I finished watching the video - it was all very powerful. But as the evening went on, I've found myself wandering my house, doing chores, catching up on work and stopping every so often saying out loud "Peace. Joy. Freedom. Love." Not necessarily in that order. And finding all sorts of ways in which those things are present in my life and a wonderful sense of contentment stealing into my often cranky heart. Thank you!
Oh my good Lord, what an episode! I’ve watched it every day for the last 3 days in a row and now I cannot put her book down. “See ya later Sunday to do list lol”.
This is everything I’ve been putting together in my own mind and life over the last ten years all wrapped up into a beautiful, entertaining package. Thank you both ladies for all you do. Sending you SO MUCH LOVE and GRATITUDE!!! 🙏
Oh my gosh that’s hilarious, that is me right now... but “see you later Wednesday to-do list” 🤣
Oh, c'mon! THIS IS FANTASTIC. THE MOMENT YOU TRUST YOURSELF AND FOLLOW YOUR TRUTH - Yep. gonna do it NOW Thank you so so much
Small steps sounds similar to the concept of taking it one day at a time. For some reason our brains handle life better this way. This book sounds like it would be especially helpful for people trying to leave cults, narcissistic family systems, etc. I think the book and this video will help a lot of people. Great video :)
Sean - We couldn't agree more small steps and taking one day at a time is a good thing! -Antoinette
According to Panache Desai we are already enlightened ! It's just a matter of recognizing it ! I love Martha Beck's talk today ! Want to get her book ! Marie, thanks for having her on.
Martha Beck, Thank you for explaining how Dante is relevant to living with integrity! Insightful!
Martha's 'Finding your North Star' inspired me to turn my life 180 degrees. Today I am inspired by two ideas that emerged in your conversation and I have written them down for follow-up. one, Marie you said, How do you make it real in our lives? The other, what Martha said: In the quiet of the night what do you yearn for? My immediate response was peace and love, I and then realized, joy and freedom. Fabulous conversation. Look forward to getting Martha's book. Blessings to all who watch this interview.
p.s. This discussion resonated with my reflections on ACIM Lesson2 128 and 129
I’m going to trust myself I’m going to follow my truth so I AM NOW
YES! That's how it's done. - Heather
This sesh is Rockin’ on so many levels. Thanks, y’all magic.Thanks also for the love for Meghan. It’s so important to stand up for her and support her.
We're so glad you enjoyed it Lizzie!
I LOVE this woman...similarly to when I first heard Byron Katie & Brené Brown first speak...I now have to go out and buy the books!! Common sense, deep wisdom, humour and grace - thank goodness we have these women to light the way. 💥🙏♥️
Wonderfull!!! "You will Know the truth... and the truth will set you free" Jesus said... 😃👏👏👏
Wow that metaphor of the plane turning one SMALL degree at a time! That's the story of the last 30 years of my life! These small baby steps are my speed of transformation and I can ALMOST say I am proud of it!
This is excellent! Yes this is me with cravings and why it's hard to stop indulging them in spite of the swelling and other uncomfortable effects. For me sometimes it's from working too much or too hard, or feeling lonely and then the craving monster comes up to help supposedly "feel good" by distracting me from the truth. My truth: relax and pace yourself! You don't have to do it all or right now!!!! Reach out to your friends! Thank you ladies for sharing this message of integrity today.
OMG!!! She's saying exactly what I've been saying for years!!
Love the "catwalk back" 🎀💐🌈🍀👍to where my Intuition led me.
A lot these points are brought up in the animated film “Soul” that won an Oscar this year. A great film!
take away: The trim tab concept. So helpful in moving my business forward and coming out of hiding. Thank you so much!
Yes this and so much else needs to be taught in school! Also: parenting skills (even if you aren’t a “parent”, you will likely have kids in your life that you will impact) - communication skills - setting boundaries - consequences - human rights & social justice - decision-making - goal setting - coping skills - critical thinking skills - ethics - identifying values - relationships ...
The truth (integrity) will set you free. 🙏 Do the Work. Byron Katie 👌
Peace, freedom, love and joy is the definition of Shalom. Also blessedness and happiness.
One takeaway: How powerful small steps are. I am encouraged. Thank you!
You’re awesome and so Is Martha. I do feel like you spent a lot of time gushing over her and I would have rather just heard more of her your ideas
I am just flabbergasted how wonderful this interview is. I am almost speechless...but I needed to write something to appraise this.
Freedom is enlightenment. Love Martha Beck.
This ine literally made me cry today.
If my heart literally shared today in my yoga class to share about wholeness and the 4 words that came to my mind were in my lovingkindnes meditation for my class? May you have love, may you have freedom, may you have joy, may you have peae. Im am sooo grateful for this today, as ive needing to move forward in my dreams a s a yoga teacher, however i could not decide whare, how, or what. Im buying the book, and also have everything is figureoutable Marie. LOVE your insights, and inspiration, your such bright lights!!!🌟🌠🦋💫
"Your circumstances in society have nothing to do with happiness. The only thing that has to do with happiness is how closely are you adhering to what you know at the deepest level is true and right for you." ..Beautiful and brilliant! Thank you, Martha and Marie!💕🙌🏼✨
Loved every minute of this, but my favorite part is when Martha says "Big changes come from tiny steps. Sometimes that step is off a cliff," and you Marie bust out laughing in full hearted joy.
Listen and feel the body reactions when I am not living my inner truth, wow this makes so much sense indeed!
Go-in and Trust yourself, learn again to listen to what you FEEL and know there is something that moves you wen u remove the doubts of others.
The Peace, Freedom, Joy, Love = Integrity touched my soul. I feel like the book should have been called fulfillment. Thank you both.
Martha has such a nack to nail complex things into such easy to comprehend and practical terms. Loved this interview! Thank you xx
Freedom,joy, peace and love, that is what we ultimately desire. Amen to that👍🏻🌹🦋🙏💖
From a movie called the rookie: it's o.k. to think about what you want to do until it's time to do what you were meant to do.
I don't accept that people tell me sinchronicity does not exist for me! Just this morning I was reading in Instagram a phrase of Tolstoi saying that to improve your soul you need to be ready to sacrifice it. My response to that was: "Go through hell if you need to do so and either loose it in the darkness or emerge at the other side, at the bottom of heaven". Which for me is Dante's Inferno of needing to go through hell and appear un paradise!!!
When i listened Martha my main insight was that we live in much more tolerant times, when we can speak up! We have freedom and can express it! Im greatful for that and thank you for opening my eyes :)))
Peace, freedom, love, joy.
Loved this message: If whatever you’re doing isn’t working, don’t do it harder. I'm learning not to push, and push, and push but to follow my joy and instincts. To listen to my body when I get headaches or pains usually stemming off of doing the wrong work or being off track in life. Thank you for this incredible conversation between 2 joyful souls shining bright and sharing their truths so beautifully and generously. Hugs.
37:46
This takes faith or maybe it becomes so dark there's very few options left to choose or the struggle falls somewhere in between.
Listening to myself guide me is self healing and was a difficult choice to step towards.
Thank you for sharing this conversation, your kind support is greatly needed in the society we're groomed in to! Your voices help by easing the transition back to nature.
Love that, and so true - your external circumstances have nothing to do happiness.
Also love - feeling bad is an emotional signal that we are off course 😊
I didn’t want this interview to end. Sooo good!!
When the question of 'yearning' was asked I said to myself 'freedom', I was pleasantly suprised that this is one of 4 that we all need as human beings - loved the interview and ordered the audio version of Martha B's new book. Thanks for sharing.
Wow! I'm going to trust myself, I'm going to follow my truth! Thank you for the exact message I needed to hear right now, today!! I never heard Martha until today. I was raised in SLC & survived sexual abuse. Became an alcoholic & now have 19 yrs sober. In sobriety I have followed the culture & on the outside very successful, inside desperately unhappy. Now I'm beginning to follow my north star. This reaffirmed my yearning for something more. I'm not crazy. I'm going to trust myself, I'm going to follow my truth!
I really dig the the mention of integrity playing such a key role in achieving true freedom...also making small course corrections ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Yesss a totally like the lieing concept. When i was young, i was told never ever to lie, lieing is the worest thing you can do. And when am not happy i can feel its because am lieing to people please and i start to go sick and stuff
Such a fantastic interview- Marie and Martha are both funny and real👊
I love Martha Beck so much. I've been following her work for years and she's always been a North star for me. Thank you, Martha. Just purchased your latest work of art. Can't wait to listen to it while I work today 💕
Visceral YES to this whole interview. As usual Marie, your videos always show up in my feed *exactly* when I need them. Can’t wait to check out Martha’s book.
Having a dark night of the soul. Thank you both for bringing in the light. Tremendous interview.🙏🏻
I love martha beck. and this conversation. what struck me was authenticity and strength in vulnerable truth. integral work on self using all senses the body the intuition feeling and thinking together. Yay. Freedom is my highest value then the rest: Peace love joy 💖
I loughed and cried, loughed and cried, loughed and cried. Thank u both SO Much. Love u. Hugs from Poland
This is incredibly TIMELY. I can barely wrap my mind around how much this addresses my current dilemma. The Universe definitely responded to my prayers through your this channel! I'm also reading Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert who Martha mentioned. Thank you!
LOVE "Big Magic"! It's such a wonderful complement to all of Martha Beck's work. Liz Gilbert also did a podcast called "Magic Lessons" that you should check out.
These are some of the most important conversations. The more we explore, the more we discover. Thanks Marie! 🙌
Marie you're the best. Martha Beck is absolutely magical. I so enjoyed this interview. ♥️