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I dident must of been someone else or it just did that. I'm not on here allot and this video is ages old this was in like 2018 when I first moved. Some videos I had to delete for several reasons or made it throughout time some which I'm surprised cause some are worth keeping cause I've moved and got several different phones through the years. It started when I moved.

Thank you Augustine. I see you're son AJ around all the time. Check up on you're son. Do it now like now. That kid has a reputation in this town and I talked to Eddie about him. If you love you're son you'd do something about his problems. I'm serious here I deleted you're # cause my Lord it was bad and Coal. Do something about Coal and AJ.

AJ is out of control. Far and beyond. He stole all of Eddies clothes and put it in that trailer years ago I walked in. I thought he wasent as bad as he's been doing but nevermind. It this case you need to make Shure you talk to him. Like pay attention to that young kid he's out of control.

It's far from perfect as always. I haven't been in a tiff by my dad lately. That's lie. No we recently got in a fight cause he's mentally ill and has anxiety. I'm looking into moving out by next year I've been working into it. He's getting old and I do get groceries cause of my mom's bad eyes. I'm looking into moving out cause it's a huge must. I've been needing to sleep on my days off allot.

I constantly drive for my mom cause she can't see she pointed to some flattened dead leaves and asked if it's a dead bunny on the patio. She's paranoid about Captain fuzz. I always go on trips buying food and junk for them it's my life now. I sometimes wished I married cause we could of mended things out but he allowed his friends to move into our place and squat. I use a special ointment it's called doTERRA my mom's friend gives it to me and I get it for free it's expensive it's magic. It works. My fiance for the most part wanted to stay together he blocked my number when he said we would be friends. After that I got to know all the local drug dealers and it's like wow I thought this area was better then that.

@@emiliakara89Rhodes well, I hope things improve. My life and relationships have always been far less than ideal. I've never ever had examples to follow to have any even basic success in life, but I have figured out that it can always be worse and I still have a better life than 60% of people in poor countries. You have been in my prayers since I first "met" you on youtube. I will continue. Who knows what God has in store for either of us. Blessings Emilia/Emily/Kara 😁

@@coolnegative yeah, I'm not going to complain too much. Back then I was hospitalized like over seven times I was bit by a brown recluse and also was as haunted as Crowley's daughter on LSD. Which I wasent doing drugs. I just was drinking allot then. I on and off would go on drinking binges and I stopped drinking plus it's expensive. I would go broke then suddenly money shows up, go broke, then money shows up. Weird and bazzar things would go on all the time. I get bit by a brown recluse,go to the hospital constantly. I'd end up in car collisions I've been in three but all stone sober never got a DUI. Mainly on rainy days. I would go through so many bazzar things constantly. The moons say things. Full moons weird things go on. I met up with a guy and dated on a full moon things seemed great karoked and kissed. He ended up in a mental hospital after reading tarot Christian books. I told him to stop doing that but he did not listen. He likes it. He was all absorbed like oh, this is so cool like I don't know anything about that. He's younger he's a baby let him learn the hard way. Way I see it. Too many hard headed people in their twenties. He would of listened more if I continued dating but I changed my mind. He wanted to date real bad but I called that all off cause he was practicing occult. He slept under a dream catcher I warned him to not do that. He said no I sleep better since sleeping under the dream catcher. Only a matter of time monthes later he called me and said he was attacked in bed by a entity. I told him to to church meet a nice young girl and get married. I go to Calvary chapel nearby it's small their women around. He was like no you're a women you get guys more. I said no that's not true. He just is making excuses why cause he likes what he's doing. He's friends with a bunch of gothic young music people. I told him I got over that years ago. He's young and un experienced not a real strong male witch I just kinda kept my info to myself cause I know how his age thinks at age 22. That's the worst age I know how I was at age 22.

@@coolnegative My entire life was turned inside down by a old friend of mine. It started by a fued I met another friend through her and after I stole her according to her. She had drug problems and was really violent. She threatned to beat me up at a Kaiser Permanente parking lot but she saw my mom and dident. I then got away from her on Facebook cause Facebook was drama. It dident stop their. I started a Pinterest just for giggles to communicate with the friend I stole her from. I make the mistake posting a bunch OF mixed occult study stuff on Pinterest so it was kinda confusing. I think I was possessed when I did this most likely was cause allot of times I forgot I did things then and I'd write strange poems back then. I was possessed no doubt. I did lots of weird things then. That's how this one real strong warlock found me on their I posted a video of Dynamite Jack my ex fiance showed me it a asian guy that starts fire with hands through meditation. My ex fiance was real wordly guy working as a sound engineer with a bunch or retards and his Co worker showed him that. I could not stand those guys. They are not seriously into that I know far more about that. Tony don't believe in God really or know who God is. He is more egnostic he grew up Christian though. He never met my old friends Sept one at her baby shower years ago. That was the friend I stole. Tony is not Christian like at all he likes NOFX is a punkrocker from Oceanside. He's a typical punk guy that drinks beer likes punk rock bowling. He did however have a Dwarves record and I saw Masked Intruder and The Queers live at El Cajon blv. And the Dwarves original founder was a actual warlock. He spent all his money on beer and Ducks hockey games. He dident really care about me. Plus I needed to just get away. His friend was talking about joining the Scottish rite and look at my uncle Bob. I told him about that he didn't care he was like yeah.. get rich worship Satan. Bunch of typical corn flakes.

Yeah I'm staying home today it's a day off. I'm also having cramps which is good cause I'm always late or never. My health is hazard it's not good when it screws up you're weight and cycle for so many years now.

@@emiliakara89Rhodes yeah, I can imagine.

The problem is these kinda dog breeds have gotten so damn pampered for centuries they become little monsters.. My ancestors treated chihuahuas like Gods for so long they kinda believed the hype. They are so cute they get away with shit but looks can be decieving.. lmao. Cant believe my own words but yeah.. really you cant trust a little lap dog with napoleon complex. I agree fully. Better get bitten by a dozen of rottweilers than bdcoming a chihuahuas bitch.

Yes and you can also see the agitations with me in his expression. He can't complain. I bought him lunch and bought him lots of his needs this day. He just needs a job.

@@emiliakara89Rhodes there's something to do with Hinduism masquing as something else. Awesome that you showed him that kindness! It was really good seeing these updates. Playfully you'll be able to posr a really good update soon! Until next time, blessings my friend!

@@coolnegative He's from Michigan and Texas he doesn't know anything about Hinduism or Kabbalah or reiki sessions. He likes Wicca and black Magicka. The classic goddess stuff he draws on his legs. He's a natural more not a notebook writer kind of guy.

@@coolnegative He wraps his blunts with Bible paper from Bible's they pass out here. He smokes with the word of God.

I'm done working for Sycuan now it's been a nightmare with Covid 19 rules now. I want a better job and my health has been up and down really bad. I've been a wreck. I was peaked up and peaked down real fast. Everyone was real rude and dident thank me for that year of hard work. It's as if they just chewed and spit out. I worked overtime lots for them and bleached walls as the servers walked out early. I felt so usless after and embarrassed. The outcome was pretty awful but I'm thankful I was able to buy a bed and get essentials time being.

@@emiliakara89Rhodes well, I'm glad you're out of there. I've worked hard and literally gave my body sweat and blood to big companies. They preach safety first and customers are your #1 priority, but then you follow those rules and get chewed out or written up for not completing your assigned daily tour. I'm now partially disabled because of going the extra mile for a company that wouldn't work with me and my orthopedic surgeon's requirements for work. They basically said do everything you did before or too bad for you, hit the pavement. I was also constantly passed over for promotion, because they wanted people willing to stab coworkers in the back and play dirty. It didn't matter how good you actually were at your job. In fact, the better you were at your job, the more they wanted to keep you there and the less likely you were to advance in the company. And the only incentive to stay in that particular position was an annual cost of living raise which was usually under .10 an hour. Wow. Sorry, didn't mean to go off on a tyraid. Let's just say I know how you feel. Good to hear from you. Your in my prayers. I hope you have a Merry Christmas despite all the bad stuff.

@@coolnegative I've never had a bed before untill now a normal full bed for two people. My life is not normal my parents were always broke. My back and sleep pattern is screwed from coming home at four am every night. My delusional dreams of marriage.They gave me write ups for dropping food and eating french fries really stupid. Employees sip Bang without a mask daily. Everyone just pushed me around and used me like a motor vacum when eventually the body just gives way. They skipped my breaks several times and I have health problems. I get stomach issues.I'm amazed I dident clunk my head passing out at least once. My desperation for essentials. I did that for a year and dishwashing. My back is crunchy and my ankles click. My life is full of wonderful things.

@@coolnegative I want someone to take care of me but no one can. My body is wrecked and I'm only thirty one. My parents are old they cant help me out someday I'll probably just be found dead in a river.

@@emiliakara89Rhodes well, I'm glad you have one now. I grew up poor and spent my whole adult life poor. I understand how frustrating it is. Especially watching everyone doing what seems like everyday things for everyone else seems so easy for them is always out of reach for me. I believe some of it is a family curse or familiar spirit, but have not been able to break it. We have a lot in common my friend.

I dident go to to SDSU my older brother and sister did though. I went to adult school for photography and did my homework for caregiving though. I never liked that school it's not for me.

@@emiliakara89Rhodes Thats great you pursued something that interests you. SDSU is overrated haha. Cheers!

@@aycarambas I cant pursue something I dont really believe in. I went to my brothers graduation like in 2017.He got a bachelor's degree for film but he doesent even use the degree now he works for a shaving packaging company and does custodial. My sister got her bachelors in like early 2000s for art but really she wanted to be a park ranger when now shes a pre school teacher. It seems to be that way always.

@@emiliakara89Rhodes That is most certainly affirmative!

I need to stop eating those though it's not good for auto immune problems.

@@emiliakara89Rhodes I just got these sweet potato chips at Costco. Did not care for them.

@@coolnegative I have insomnia and a bunch of anxiety disorder problems. Panic attacks and I can get sick for days if I'm not checking on how I take care of myself. I cant hang around drug addicts . I've done that more then once now. I've gone through some things some people would blame me about but I never used hard drugs. You have to be careful who you share you're problems with some of my family members cant relate. What does not help is that I'm in the worst gene pool you can think of with mental illness problems so when we were being formed we were already forming problems. Those things they can understand about but when it comes to lifestyle not everyone is the same. Some are as conservative as it gets and some are as bad as it gets.

@@coolnegative I used to get bullied real badly growing up why I have some psychological problems. I also used to sleep on the streets sometimes with friends that were hooked on hard drugs. I hung around the rock bottom drug addicts into meth or heroin. I've met the drug dealer with King diamond on his fridge with a growing daughter. I've met the gay men in Hillcrest that do tweek and heroin. I've slept over at friends and squatted in my younger twenties. I now can get hooked up with roommates but since I have health problems its different. It's a shaky deal I call off cause my health is shaky. If I'm going to have a man in my life he has to take care of me.

@@coolnegative I'm going through a mid life crisis right now. I need to get another job my back is really bad but at that same time this is not a good time to look for work I already have and it's really hard. I dont have any energy or a life anymore. I have a chance to get to know some other people maybe at a church and find some decent roommates. They have to be like minded not conflicting on lifestyles.

Augustine!