Видео

i might not have bpd but… im scared of my friends leaving me. im scared if i mess up or something, or one of my friends end up leaving me or whatever.. i keep feeling like everyone hates me or im always doing something wrong.. and i dont even know if thats true. i wish i could control myself and realize my friends definitely don’t hate me. some of my friends even told me themselves that i’m like.. one of their best friends, or a good friend. But i just keep having these thoughts that they dont like me. at all.

i hate it. I HATE IT. HATE BEING SO DAMN SESNTIVE I THINK EVERYBODY IS GONNA LEAVE OR ABBODND ME IF I MAKE A SINGLE MISTAKE. 'im talking too much thats why he hanst repiled...im annyoing him' JUST KEEPS COMING TOO ME. HE HASNT REPILED TO ME IN THREE DAYS IVE TEXTED HIM FIVE TIMES HAVE I FUCKED UP? I HATE LOVING PEOPLE OR MAYBE ITS BECUASE IM NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR HM. and i lost so many of my firneds becuase of myself. i get worried when they dont text me or talk to me so i gnore them thinking were done and they come back saying 'i was busy' oh. can some just hold me and whisper sweet words to me and not stop for me? i wish someoen wouldnt leave me for second. im so scared he hates me...

0:00 - 3:02 -all i want is u 3:04 - 6:58 -jigsaw 7:00 - 9:30 -washing machine heart 9:32 - 14:27 -better than me 14:30 - 17:43 -gemini Lol, I’m go to sleep…

I’m so honestly exhausted of being treated like a freak. WORST PART IS ITS UNDERSTANDABLE. I EOULDNR WANT TO BE NEAR SOMEONE LIKE MYSELF EITHER. It feels like I’ll never feel loved or good in general. I want someone to love me the way I love but i wouldn’t be able to deal with it. My own friend said pwbpd should be “killed off” bc they’re horrible (they know ab my bpd). I’m honestly so furious. I want to be understood but I feel like a monster. I AM A PERSON. PLEASE JUST BE MY FRIEND FOR FUCKS SAKE I SWEAR I DONT WANT TO HURT ANYONE (unless I’m having a self sabotaging episode where I wanna drive everyone away because I feel like I’m a bad person that doesn’t deserve friends). I made mistakes but I’ve actually made so much progress on my own but everyone still sees the bad side of me. All I ask is for a bit of empathy. I don’t want my actions to be excused, I just want people to understand how I view things and realise my actions are because I’m afraid of abandonment. If you hate being my fp TALK TO ME ABOUT IT AND WE LL DISCUSS OPTIONS THAT WORK FOR THE BOTH OF US. I CAN STILL HOLD CONVERSATIONS. IM NOT A BIG BAD WOLF THATS GONNA EAT U ALIVE IF U OPEN UR MOUTH.

sorry if this sounds inconsiderate, but what exactly is BPD? is it two personalities, or intense mood swings, or neither? i don't know much about it, and I don't want to make any bad assumptions about it. I'm sorry if i come off as insensitive, I just want to be properly informed about BPD, so i can be as respectful as possible whenever i come across this topic.

This song puts me in such a good mood for some reason, but when i started living the lyrics and actually feeling them, it changed to a different story

Tw vent Tbh I don’t know if I have bpd but all I know is that I’ve got a bad mental disorder. My friend and me had a fight because I said stupid things which I regret as it triggered them. I feel guilty but I couldn’t control it. My family feels like I hate them but I can’t control myself, at all. The hospital place I went to get an autism thing they just said to get symptoms from school but like, people mask. I don’t understand. My mum doesn’t understand me when I’m talking about how I feel as If I’m talking a different language. I never know what I did wrong. I can’t sh as I’m just too cowardly. Just why? Why can’t I punish myself. I’m a bad person. That’s all I know

listening to this while scrolling on shtwt LMFAO

I tried to deny it but when my obsession grows with people to the point i get mad and feel like i need to hurt others to keep them to myself i just knew and finally accepted it..

Love crying and drinking knowing i have BPD and ruin everything i touch that I love

It sucks i always get head aches and feel like nothing changes each day even if i do something

I never meant any of it,im not a bad person,im not a monster,i swear..

My personality and me:

This feels more like I'm 14 and this is deep

Not so fun fact -When I was in a mental hospital I was told that the doctors don’t usually diagnose people my age with bpd and instead is diagnosed with Depression and anxiety I was then Told that I do have bpd

every time I'm manic I think I'm getting better then I fall back into a depressive episode and realize I was manic, not getting better and it physically hurts in my heart when I realize that

I'm questioning my mental state rn

This hit to hard

Me in the comments searching for that one commenter that posted all the time stamps

I searched up my symptoms on why I was feeling like this the first thing I saw was bpd I was shook because when I told my dad my symptoms he said he knew what it was and he has bpd it all makes sense now.

I haven’t been diagnosed with bpd yet but my life is constantly crumbling around me and everyone acts like its fine, I want to be normal cool whatever you’d call it but the more I try the worse it gets ppl take it the wrong way it just sucks

He told me he loved me then, now I love him, but all I can hear from him is "I'll never love you again."

I might have bpd but anytime i say something about it I feel like im just seeking attention even though I've shown every sign of bpd and im to scared to get a proper diagnosis and I hate it

I am literally dysfunctional in an intimate environment. It’s never enough love. I’m so fucking sensitive. I have had suicidal thoughts since I was 14. I am swimming in my emotions all of the fucking time. Cutting is the only thing that has made it go away consistently. I have no identity beyond my fp and I really don’t want to. Maybe it’s just my ocd and ptsd and adhd… Sometimes I just want to rip myself apart because everything eventually becomes like a tangled mat of thread and the only way out is cutting it all up.

Listrjn ths playlsir when yu drunk>>>>

i wish i never fell in love with someone who has a lover

I try not to hurt amyone. It wasnt my fault he ruined me and made me this way. My HPD and BPD dont define me. Im a creative person under this, im nice i promise

Whats BPD?

i dont even know if i have bpd to be honest, my therapist says i do and have all the signs, but im too young to be diagnosed. i dont believe i have bpd, thats just another problem to add to my mental health, im in recovery and yet she tells me i have bod out of nowhere? like i would believe that.

Why do I have fucking BPD? Why wasn't I born normal as other people? Why didn't my parents do the abortion before I was born? 😭😭😭

I dunno if this is because of my bpd but I never feel real. Like I feel numb all the time and I constantly question whether I'm actually here in this world or if its just a dream and im not actually grown up and im still the 4 year old that was abvsed. I pray everyday that im d3ad and im living in a simulation. I feel numb I h8 myself :)

was in a big crisis couldn't even identify what it was im still in the middle of it but i cant hear my thoughts over this playlist so , nice BPD ruined my life :))

I WANT TO HUNG. MY EMOTIONS ARE TOO MUCH. I AM VERY ANGRY. I SO WANT TO YELL AT SOMEONE, BUT I UNDERSTAND THAT IF I YELL AT MY FRIENDS, I CAN LOSE THEM... So I direct all the aggression towards myself.. I cut my legs with a razor 15 minutes ago, and then drank quite a bit of vodka. I feel sick and stagger. AND I HATE MYSELF SO FUCKING MUCH!!! AND NO ONE KNOWS ABOUT MY SUFFERING. I SUPPRESS EMOTIONS EVERY DAY... AND I'M FUCKING 14 YEARS OLD. I CAN'T GET HELP!

Sounds like oldschool hip hop 39:28

why cant i be in a relationship for longer than a month? why am i getting angry so easily? why do i feel like im incomplete? why cant i love myself? why do i act like a monster? i love everyone so why do i act like that?

Listening to this after I blew up on my boyfriend once again for the smallest inconvenience. I hate, hate, hate.. don’t even know what, I just feel hatred and anger and the fact I don’t wanna feel it makes me angrier. Why am I so messed up.. I want to punch myself until I throw up.

I don't know much about bpd..I did some research AND THE 1ST SONG IS LITTERELY BPD . Literally if bpd was a song then it would be the first song in the playlist.

Umm... I really wanna be better. I'm sick of everyone leaving me. I hate it when they blame me cuz ik that I'm the one to blame. I don't wanna tell my mom cuz she won't understand and in top of that she already has so much problems of her own so I have no one who can help me get better. If it is possible plz give me some advice on how to be better. I just got into a fight because with my friends and it was my fault I was the one who got my anger out on them but when I said sorry they started bashing out saying that they are tired of me and that I have always hurt them. I should think before I speak and they also told me to seek some serious help cuz they can't take it anymore. I'm sick of balling my eyes out every god damn time. I don't wanna hurt anyone.

I don’t know if I have bpd or depression or both but I had s**c*de attempts and SH and the doctors said I have depression but I don’t feel like myself fit exactly into the depression category but I do find myself relating to a lot of the bpd symptoms but I’m not 18 yet and I don’t really want to tell anyone about it and my parents are basically in denial about my whole situation even when the doctor had already said I’m depressed and I’ve stayed in a mental hospital for around 3 days but all they tell me is stop pretending and it sometimes makes me think that I’m faking all this as well because I don’t really most of my past I literally don’t remember much from last year and my childhood is just empty like someone had erased them but not very cleanly since I do remember some things here and there I don’t really have anyone to share with even though I don’t mind talking to a therapist but I don’t really want my parents to know

I just don’t want to feel everything in extreme, even happiness. I want control of myself. I want to stop falling apart over people and connections. I wanna stop my addiction to people.

I don't have BPD but this playlist is amazing

God I had a fight with my best friend of 9 years and it was… really really bad. Looking at the messages I don’t think I said anything too bad but it was also over text. She wouldn’t even explain how I messed up this time, she just said she was done with my shit. I want to message her so bad to maybe get explanations or something to get closure but I know it’s just going to end in another fight.

At this point,everyone in this comment section has got a li'l dazai osamu in them. Lol✌️

oh no every one was already in my playlist

I'm hoping to get diagnosed with BPD on July 25th. I am unable to keep friends. I have insane meltdowns that scare everyone away. I am a monster, and an extremely abusive person, and I run away. I'm hoping this is it. The end of the cycle, after a decade. I'm so fucking sick of hurting people. It's not them. It's me. It has always been me.

everyone is better then me is so real.

« I got mental issues,always fucking miss you »bpd in 2 lines

As someone who recently dealt with a split, all over your personality fragments deserve love. Mine do too. Love all parts of yourself. Yes, it’s hard, but we got this

I am afraid.. I am going to get myself screened for BPD because I researched it thoroughly and it feels like my eyes were opened. I fit the bill like a glass slipper to Cinderella's foot. It seems like all my suffering might finally be relieved, I know this has to be it. Everything that's been happening for years has been like this and I just want help because all my relationships have been so chaotic and I've always felt like I was going to get abandoned even over someone having a bad day from something totally unrelated to me.

I want to kms because i bring ppl down with my bipolar disorder i sh my self and im mentally drained and constantly yelling at ppl and end up crying i hate me life i fallied my atemp my dad is in jail and i am so ugly. I'm a fvcking disappointment my mom hates me my family is toxic I js want to end it all but I wonder if anyone would even care? I'm have been depressed since I was 10 I'm 17 now.