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It sounds like you have a great opportunity in front of you to have an honest conversation with him. Otherwise, you’ll keep feeling the stress and pressure, and he will not see any reason to change. If he doesn’t want you to quit, he needs to know what will keep you there. You can quit and find another job, and he knows that. Express empathy for the stress he is under and try to find common ground. Share what you value about him and stay grounded in trust- trust in God that He has a plan for you, and trust in yourself, that you are a hard worker and a good employee. You will get through this- either with a better job or a better boss!

@ Thank you for the advice, that’s helpful 🙏

I hope you have been able to forgive yourself, John. We all make mistakes. It’s part of being human.

I’m sorry to hear it has been so hard for you to work under someone else. I can imagine how stressful that was for you. I’m guessing you have a history of being hurt by authority figures. The bright side is that you’re able to be an entrepreneur! How wonderful to be able to set your own schedule and goals. Entrepreneurship is a wonderful option, and I’m glad you figured that out!

Yes! Thank you!

Thanks for the feedback! I’m learning…

Hi Mohibquadri, I do think small wins help us gain confidence to keep going. For me, knowing God uses what I see as my failures to help me grow and learn and trust Him for the next hard thing gives me hope. Adversity keeps me humble and approachable, and empathetic to others. Metaphors also help me- like how a muscle can only get stronger through being torn (working out). I did find a good book on Amazon you might want to check out: Rise and Go: How to Get Back Up with Courage and Move Forward with Confidence a.co/d/a6A48Gs

​@@SpeakEaglewithDrP Thanks a Million 💚 😊

I think your best one is “writing a situation down instead of building resentment.” Reminds me of journaling. I’m guessing you had to do a bit of forgiving and letting go of it in order not to build resentment?

@@SpeakEaglewithDrP yeah, but no-one takes ownership for lying and messing with you. Unless you come in as their Daddy. Mental health professionals especially. And sometimes not even then. I can write it down, but will they ever admit, in 10,000 words or less, I’m pissed off for a reason?

@@thetruther954 I get it, and that’s really frustrating. The way I see it, we can ask for an apology but we can’t make anyone do anything. All we can control is ourselves and our responses. Sometimes I have to just go for a speed-walk to kick in some natural endorphins and then go help someone less fortunate than me. I was with someone this week in ICU in the hospital and it made my problems seem a little smaller.

@@SpeakEaglewithDrP I don’t think you do get it. That sounded like the tongue lashing I was afraid of. I’m not going to do all of that.

I didn’t mean it as a tongue lashing at all, just sharing what has helped me. I’m sorry it came across that way. You can certainly continue to try to insist that others take responsibility for their actions.

Glad you enjoyed it!

I’m smiling at this comment. 😊You’re the best!

Thanks for your question. I would want to stay in close communication with people who could help me catch mistakes before they become a crisis. The truth is, you can only do your best, and sometimes we do make mistakes because we are human. Hopefully you have a team, which can help you not feel quite so alone with this pressure. The fact that you don’t want to cause a loss for the company tells me that you already are a conscientious employee who desires to do your best. The more you worry, the more you will lock yourself up with anxiety. Instead, rest in the fact that you are not alone, and you are doing your best.

I get it! I am in the process of working on creating a masterclass in Executive Presence, so managers learn how to communicate with their team in ways that will encourage engagement, encourage innovation, and encourage awesome people like you to want to stay! I hate that you have been treated so terribly. Your best bet is to find out from the people in your network what companies in your area have healthy culture, and apply there.

Hi dcjkl8088- You are definitely NOT alone- especially when over 36K people have now watched this video. And now that you are 23, you can hopefully start to break free of the control of your parents and decide on your own that you don't have to live in fear. As you grow in confidence and autonomy, I hope you can also find empathy for your parents- because they also are living in fear, which is why they want to do everything for you. I think it's great that you ask a lot of questions at work because I'll bet one day there will be someone who will ask you a lot of questions and you will know how they feel! Remember that making mistakes is a part of being human- and it's the best way we learn. Jesus was perfect so you don't have to be. May you find your identity in His strength and His love for you.

Hi ankit34370- thank you for commenting here, and for your honesty. Anxiety can be debilitating. But mistakes are what make you human. If you never made mistakes you would be a robot! And then, even robots make mistakes. You mentioned that your anxiety about this is affecting your learning and growth. I would encourage you that probably the way we learn the most is by making mistakes. Thomas Edison, who eventually invented electricity, said, "I have not failed 10,000 times, I have successfully found 10,000 ways that will not work." I love that, because it means he kept trying, even when he made mistakes. And eventually he found the solution! So embrace your mistakes and learn from them, for they are the way we grow the most!

@@SpeakEaglewithDrP This is the best answer I have found so far.

It’s really challenging to recognize our softer emotions in the moment, especially when we are hurting so much. I’m sorry for your pain and loss, Andrew. I’m glad you are able to recognize now how your loneliness was fueling your anger. Maybe communicating from that softer place could help your relationships in the future. Thank you for sharing. God bless you.

Hi Sangee- It’s amazing how our minds work, isn’t it? Our fear trips us up and makes it more difficult to do excellent work. I think it’s time to say goodbye to fear because it isn’t serving you well. Your mind is trying to jump ahead and protect you, but it’s not helping. Letting go of your fear, trusting God that He put you in this job for a reason, and accepting imperfection may be the keys for you to be able to finally concentrate and do the good work you know you are capable of doing.

Hi Adetilda- thank you for sharing. I think our anxiety over making mistakes makes us make more mistakes! It’s when we breathe and rest in our imperfect humanness that we can let go of our fear. You are not what you do. You are so much more than that. You will make mistakes and that has to be ok. Perfection is an illusion anyway. So breathe in the grace of God. Ask for help when you need it. Admit when you make a mistake. Learn from it. And let go. Jesus was perfect so you don’t have to be ❤️

@@SpeakEaglewithDrP thank you so much, God bless you.

Faheem! You made me smile with your comment. I say this to myself all the time and it helps keep me calmer, too. Thank you so much for sharing this. You made my day.

That’s great Ms. Pansy! Thank you for sharing. You will love every minute of it!

Hi obsessions, I totally understand. The hard thing is, we can’t make anyone listen to us or let us in. All we can control is the way we communicate with the other person and pray they grow in their ability to empathize. Be sure when you are explaining why that you stick to communicating from your softer emotions (like sadness or loneliness) and whenever they do listen or let you in, affirm them like crazy!

@@SpeakEaglewithDrP thannk you!

Hi Glen- I have been there, and I agree it’s agony! My best defense against anxiety is to say, “Well, I guess there’s another example of how I’m imperfect and human.” Because we can’t be anything BUT imperfect and human! The days I hold myself to the standard of being perfect are very anxious days because I screw up every day. To be human is to make mistakes. And that’s okay. Peace and grace to you!

Empress, thank you for sharing. This is so hard to hear because your manager is expecting perfection. And unless your manager hires robots, perfection is an unreasonable expectation. Even then, sometimes robots make mistakes! I feel for you in this situation and pray you will be able to rest in your imperfections and trust God for a more grace-filled manager in the future.

Thanks, Pranay. I guess it’s heartfelt because I have beat myself up so much for making mistakes at work and I want to learn to give myself grace instead. And I want that for you, too.

You are welcome, Yasmeen. Thank you for your comment!

Hi Shalaba- thank you for your comment. I have found one of the best ways to ask a question of a senior employee is to first tell them they are the expert and that is why you are coming to them. They will appreciate the respect, and you will get your question answered!

Hi Pat- wow! I can imagine working with infant animals is both incredibly rewarding and incredibly stressful. And yet all you can do is your best each day. Do you ever work in pairs and check each other’s dosages?

@@SpeakEaglewithDrP yep and it's helpful to each other when we do:)

Hi Amber- it’s so hard to overcome the fear that keeps us being a turtle! I still find I struggle with it. If you can find one safe person who you can be honest with, practice “sticking your neck out” with them!

Hi Devlins10- that’s a tough place to live because so little in life is certain! What have you found helps you not be anxious when you are uncertain?

Hi Brianagh- One of the best ways is to tell your bf how much it means to you when he does communicate with you. Tell him thank you, and how it helps you feel close to him when you are apart. If he does text you, tell him right then how much it meant. Sometimes finding the “bright spots” and praising the other person when they do it “right” can be more persuasive than telling them they are doing it wrong or need to do it better.

Temidayo, thank you for sharing your tears and your pain here. I see you and hear you. You are not alone - ever.

You are so welcome, Seema! What have you found that has helped you in your life to find your voice?

Shauna- thank you for your encouragement! I felt your hug through your words the day you first posted your comment and I still feel it when I re-read it tonight. Grateful to have you as my sister in Christ ❤️

@@SpeakEaglewithDrP I’m so grateful for you as well! Thankful for Gods divine connections♥️ Keep pressing! I look forward to your videos & all that God is doing in your life. All my love!!🙏🏽♥️

Thanks for that feedback! I’m learning as I go.

Thank you, Sara!

Thank you, Hanna!

Hey Dukie mon- I can see your frustration with this. And it might not work for everyone. For me, imagining making the mistake helps me remember it’s ok to be human and it wouldn’t be the end of the world if I made the mistake. It can also help me come up with a plan, like simply admitting I made the mistake and asking for help. I also think sometimes I believe lies in my head like, “I’m such an idiot” and I need to replace them with truth that making a mistake doesn’t make me an idiot, it makes me human.

Totally. So many. Which shows the maturity of the partner. Unfortunately, we can’t change others or control their responses. We can only control how we communicate and hope to lead by example.

How are you doing, Sambit? Thank you for sharing. I pray you can experience peace in your imperfections through Jesus. He was perfect so we don’t have to be. May you receive this gift of God and rest in Him.

This is happening with me too.

Am in this situation now and am so confused and it feel bad I have family to feed am so afraid to be fired

Wonderful to hear, Nicky! Thanks for sharing! ❤️

Vijesh, I'm sure that doesn't help you to enjoy your days off! It's good to focus on the solutions and to be open with your supervisor. If you can, ask them for help and treat them like they are an expert in the area in which you made a mistake. We are less likely to come down hard on someone who tells us they look up to us as an expert!

Your anger is a sign that you value yourself and your worth, and that is a good thing, Arroba. Where we get ourselves in trouble is when we start believing what they say and it affects our confidence. You must learn to combat lies with truth- especially with the truth that God created you as unique and precious in His sight. My video “How to Communicate When You’re Angry,” might help you, too. ruclips.net/video/CPeru_dPrPU/видео.html

It's so easy to revert to negative self-talk and to then jump to conclusions, isn't it? It takes serious self-discipline to speak positively to yourself, like an awesome best friend would talk to you. If you can catch yourself soon enough, you can turn your self-talk positive and say things like "You are doing the best you can, Michael. Don't give up. Mistakes are how you learn. You are covered by Grace. Rest in Grace. It's going to be okay!" That's what the Holy Spirit says to you, because He is living in you. So listen to Him.

Damn Michael this sums up how i am feeling right now😐

Feeling the same way

Thank you, Carolyn!!

Great question, Yanyan! Just like at home, it’s also not going to help your relationships at work to be a turtle, a fox, or a bulldog when you are angry. Eagles at work take the high road, and communicate from the place of what they long for. Do you long for a more unified team? Clients who respect you? Trust- based relationships with coworkers? A boss who welcomes feedback? Communicate from a place of longing, as that can help people be more receptive than coming at them with your anger. Also, ask good curious questions about how you can help them in the area where you are frustrated. If a coworker keeps missing deadlines and that make you look bad, you can ask that coworker if there’s anything that you can do to help them make the deadlines. Communicate the good that you want for them, too!

@@SpeakEaglewithDrP Thank you for your reply! It's very helpful!

I’m sorry to hear that this was your experience, catpaws. It’s interesting to note that criticizing people doesn’t help them make less mistakes, but more mistakes! Obviously, criticism is not a good strategy for encouraging good work. What would you like your manager to do instead? What would help you the most?

Feel the same way