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Love to see this topic come up! This episode, specifically the portion around perfectionism in your workout routine, reminded me of a RUclips video by Caroline Winkler titled “How I Accidentally Learned to Love Exercise”. I highly recommend watching if anyone is feeling that “perfectionism” pressure. She has another great one with similar messaging around disordered eating called “The Honest Truth About How I Stopped Obsessing Over Food” (really, every single one of her videos is phenomenal). I almost never comment on videos, I just felt very compelled to share because those two videos have REALLY helped me with some of the things you’re discussing in this video!

When I was in the home stretch of grad school my wife and kids decided to return home to Utah so I could finish my thesis without interruption. I rented room in the basement of a lady in the ward. In the basement she had bookshelves of Mormon intellectual literature. Apparently her dead husband was big in the Sunstone Symposium crowd back n the 80s so they collected a treasure trove of subversive material. One book caught my attention…Nightfall at Nauvoo. That book shook me to my core just like Mr. Lee. I had already been dabbling in Mormon apologetics so I wasn’t exactly naive to my faith being challenged, however, this book was a sledgehammer to the face. Needless to say, within the year I was divorced and left the church never to look back.

I’m sad I missed the submission for these stories cause I’ve got a few 😂 for example a couple years ago I randomly remembered a guy I got to know in a college class my freshman year (probably about 6/7 years before this story), and I decided to google him (he played football). A couple days later I got a follow request on Instagram, and sure enough it was him 😮 I don’t think I had looked him up on Instagram at all, just googled his name! It freaked me out for real 😂

Speaking of angel numbers, have you noticed that you gave birth to twins on a 3/3 date? (Ignoring a zero lol) If you add up their birthdays it equals to yours, 6/6 👀 Your girls combined are your lucky charms!

Your poem made me cry!! So beautifully written ❤️‍🔥!!! Also, these stories made me re-question literally everything lmao

okay here to demistify the targeted ad thing a bit. again, my background is digital marketing. i do suspect our phones/apps are listening. i have no proof of that as companies will keep that udner wraps. HOWEVER, targeted ads really are that good at tracking you across many apps and websites and searches and can and will serve you ads that make you think theyre listening, when really it's just a coincidence and/or was always going to happen but you just weren't paying attention. for example, maybe you were recently looking up other runners things -- blogs on running advice, searching a running route, using a runners app. maybe you were interacting with like sports bras or shoes. you were probably served ads on those sites, so advertisers have essentially a profile on the "type" of customer you are (a runner, female, interested in x, y and z). maybe you were always going to be served that legging ad and the timing was coincidental! thats the most likely answer. 😊 advertisers have a lot kf access to your search behavior and can build quite accurate profiles of you based on your search history and purchasing habits. the EU has tried to regulate this a bit more (thats why you see all those allow cookies notifs on sites now), but they still have a ton of access. especially the big apps like tiktok and meta. and yes, they do know who you follow and their profiles. youre spot on!!

omg i do the SAME THING with maps!! also, btw re:chat gpt. you mentioned in an insta story recently that eating meat is more harmful for the environment than using chatgpt. idk how true that is, but regardless, chat gpt is still extremely unethical to use. one, it's contributing to job loss and corner cutting by many companies (insurance companies, famously , for starters. but many white collar jobs as well). two, it's trained on stolen data. stolen from artists, writers, journalists. it's also incredibly inaccurate. i encourage you to research how LLMs work and what "hallucinating" is as it relates to LLMs (which is what chat gpt is. i urge you to reconsider using it. especially as a search engine, as it is frequently incorrect and uses more resources than a regular search engine. i will save you my spiel about how Google search is shit now because of AI lol but yeah. i hope you read this and consider my points! love the pod ❤ also, fwiw, i worked in marketing for 10 years, specifically SEO, so i'm very familiar with LLMs and how they're being applied. at my last company there were layoffs of our writers because of it and the quality of our output was dogshit after that! but ceos only cared about saving a buck. talented people were let go and our clients got a shittier product. and all on stolen data! anyway ok now i'm forreal done lol

I can't find it at a glance, but one of my favorite science communicators has a good video on pareidolia (our tendency to find patterns where they don't necessarily exist, such as seeing faces in objects) and coincidences. That video was a big part of me opening my mind up to the idea that maybe things I attributed to God were just things that happen and I find the patterns. The channel is "Answers with Joe" if someone else wants to hunt for the video.

Ya know, now that I actually think about it, I feel like Mormonism is a great religion to go hand and hand with simulation theory. You go through everything you need to go through, and when you reach the point you get your own "planet" what if you actually just get a computer simulation to start and then the people in your simulation that think they're worshipping "God" are actually worshipping the dude that runs their simulation. Like I know it's a little out there, but it seems plausible

Your poem was chefs kiss. I was only a couple of stanzas in when I couldn’t help but stop, close my eyes and, hand to heart to allow and enjoy as each word landed. You are a gifted writer. Thank you for sharing it. I’m going to screen record it so that I can experience each morning with my morning meditation. ❤ Love you and your heart and beautiful soul. 😘

This is such a fun video! I could have listened to a hundred of the stories. My strange coincidence happened about 23 years ago. We went to Universal Studios in California with our 3 kids. About a month later, our next-door neighbor asked if we had been at Universal recently. I told her we had. She told us that her son, who was serving a mission in Taiwan, had been talking with a family. They showed him their vacation pictures to the US. In one of the pictures, our family was in the background! He described my hat and how we were all wearing red. It was next to the big globe. I was stunned! He was stunned! The world is smaller than we think it is.

I just got done listening to Shari's audiobook. She is sooo smart and so talented... but I'm very surprised that she is still LDS....

I have a genetic syndrome that makes my face look really different from most people's. Growing up in the church was so painful in so many ways. But one thing was the emphasis on girls looks. Just one example is how the young men leaders at mutual would say, "Who wants to say the prayer? Come on guys, you're wife will be hotter if you say it!" Stuff like that just adds up when you don't fit the mold of what is conventionally attractive. I now find my unique face very cool and beautiful but that's in spite of all of the messaging. And I am finally fixing my relationship with food and my disordered eating habits. Thanks for this one!

Both my wife and daughter jumped on ozempic. Why? I tried to talk them out of it and lost. I don’t get it. They are both not overweight at all. They just want to be skinny. It’s sad. The short term side effects are real and who knows about long term.

When Shannon read the Glennon Doyle excerpt at the end!!!! wow so so so so SO good!!!!! Thank you both, this was a great episode!! (I think you can tell I loved it by all the !! haha)

Love this episode. If you were able to get jennette mccurdy on here it would be suuuuuuch a good episode

This is such a good podcast. The best yet in my opinion. I struggle so much with hating my body. I think it started with genius. I asked my mom why women have to have periods and bleed. She responded with Eve. She sinned and now we are cursed. I began hating my body then. Of course I don't think my mom's intention wad that out come. I have always been overweight. I always felt like the ugly sister. I am in need to deconstruct this. What a perfect time to do this as well as the world turns into weight loss adds for all the new years resolution season. What a good podcast to remind us to love our body. Learned so much here!

Nonverbal people communicate on their own all the time. Which someone who did a whole podcast like Telepathy Tapes about it should definitely know.

Gonna be honest, a few days ago I had unsubscribed to your channel because I am just feeling more like exploring other topics is where I want to be. But now I’ve re-subscribed! Because I feel like this is where I am at too! I have been looking into spirituality pretty much ever since leaving Mormonism because I realized I need there to be more than just the physical, science proven things. I know that atheism works fine for a lot of people but I am just not one of them. But at the same time I am being really careful to not be duped. With everything I have been learning it is so nice to be able to say, well I don’t think this resonates with me, and be able to pick and choose what I’ll believe in! I love that it is my choice, not some pre subscribed dogma that I have to believe in or I’ll go to outer darkness.

edit: you want lot of specifically female science educators? physics, neuroscience, biology, astrophysics, psychology, psychiatrists, secular theologists, biologists, marine biologists. etc etc. science communicators has been my main source of content for decades. there is a very long list of people that can be relatable to anybody and help you figure out what objective truth is. old male exmormon here. this is relatable to me too. people leave mormanism and now their personal brands become exmormonism. I quickly got tired of watching 4hr mormon stories podcasts. and I slowly got tired of talking about mormonism. even in exmo support coffee groups I'd rather talk about anything but our mormon stories. then part of my frustration with mormonism,. the hypocrisy, got refocused onto exmos and atheists. exmos... still hypocrites. atheists... still hypocrites. me... yeah I'm human, we're all kinda hypocrites. beyond it all I still value personal growth. learning how to be better. but my values are only MY values. some will agree and some won't. 13:24 and then we get into the VERY common exmo desire to believe in some woowoo shit. I spend arguably way way too much time watching science communicator content. over decades I have repeatedly learned that humanity is superstitious and confuses "scientific fact" with both science and fact. side note: there is a website all about fallacies and biases. www.schoolofthought.org/projects I think humanity needs spiritualism. it is a critical coping mechanism. but spiritualism shouldn't be confused with fact. its more like a personal realization that is relevant only to ourselves and our own mental health. for actual fact I advise people to start with the YT channel CrashCourse Science History. It is a long playlist but, personally, I don't think any education is complete without this. then just make science and neuroscience a common part of your science news. we are just wired to believe in our own personal experience of reality and that isn't the OBJECTIVE reality.

I love the idea of the path for your show. I am a person who left Mormonism over a decade ago and has made major changes in my life since. Therapy for me has been a wonderful way to process the past and not to dwell on it. Now I’m in the stage where I am further constructing my own beliefs. I am an atheist but a sense of spirituality or an underlying meaning I think can be so healthy. I look forward to seeing new formative ideas. Personally I don’t think a belief system has to be about God etc. but maybe just ways to connect with and relate to my environment that becomes a healthy way of moving forward. It will be very interesting to see where your channel goes!

i'm happy that you dug deeper into the telepathy tapes and were open to being wrong. honestly, this is so key to any reconstruction efforts. i'm a never-mo but was raised catholic and now i'm agnostic. there's probably something out there but i think it's mostly beyond our comprehension and i don't derive comfort, personally, from trying to force an answer or find a definitive answer. quite frankly, i think we can't know and i've learned over time to be comfortable with not knowing. it doesn't change the fact that life is going to have very difficult moments and very beautiful moments and the best i can do is bring good into the world rather than bad.

I always appreciate your insight and fun! Thank you Hayley! The stories of past cringy stories you've read from your audience has always been one of my favorite parts of show, but I don't ever blame you for wanting to try something new or move on to other things. Best of luck!

The podcast was not an end result. It's a means to an end and solid experiments. What you're talking about, regarding materialism, is Scientism. The blind belief in science. Seeing sceptics not being even bothered to listen to all episodes before they come to a conclusion. Considering there's decades of investigations into NDE and the similarities between cases and the contradiction in how the brain should react to reduced oxygen during NDE compared to what people experience is staggering.

This is going to be epic and I’m so dang excited. I want to hear it all! You’re amazing and this podcast is just going to keep getting better. 🖤

I would lovvve if you do a deep dive on evolution. As a former christian it’s just always something I dismissed. Your podcast has helped me deconstruct and with that I really started learning about humans and how we actually got here. One night my husband was telling me about how we are made from the same things as stars, we are all stardust. I started crying.

Thank you for this. I watched this twice. Second time so I could take notes. I’m on my journey of breaking from Mormon Utah patriarchy mindset. I’m finding it really difficult, and my mindset is hurting my relationship. It’s hard breaking my mindset. But this video is so great thank you.

I started the process to leave about a year and a half ago. Almost a year ago my records got removed. I'd been doing good emotionally, then over the weekend I found the letter I got informing me my records had been removed and while I was so happy when I got it, it was a sucker punch to me when I reread it and I've been all up in my feelings about it recently. I feel like while I'm so happy I've left, there will always be a part of me that grieves the friendships and relationships I lost when I left. I went from having a huge group of solid friends I did so much with, to how I don't really have a ton. A prime example is for my 22nd birthday I had me and about 15 friends together for dinner. This year for my 25th, it was me and three of my friends, and we're all in similar progressions and share a lot of the same stories. I'm also learning that sometimes quality over quantity too.

The premise of the telepathy tapes seems like… ableist… in a way? Like saying autistic people who are nonverbal are like superheroes? “Extraordinary and inspiring” are words used often to describe autistic people as if we are inspiration porn because our lives are “so hard.” Hope that makes sense. I was very skeptical when you posted that and I’m so glad you addressed this part of it!!

I will be the first to admit, I HATED thinking you would make this switch. I knew it was coming and I DREADED it 😅. However, I have recently begun reconstructing without really realizing it. After listening to this episode, I am now all aboard this train and can’t wait for everything to come. You knew what I needed before I knew. I’m forever thankful for how you helped me deconstruct, but I’m even more thankful at your willingness to help me grow! Huge hugs! 💜

Hayley! I’m so excited about this! I left the church two years ago and have been trying to reconstruct. This is going to be so fun!

I absolutely love this transition. So excited to carry on listening. I’ve deconstructed fully now, and I’m living a happy life with my Mormon husband. (He is legit the best - I know how lucky I am). I pleased that this transition is happening ❤️❤️❤️

Hi Hayley! I've been here since early 2023 when I was in the THICK of my own post Mormon journey. I have truly treasured every step of the journey and your podcast has gotten me through so much. Faith transition isolation & loneliness, grief, divorce, a cross country move out of Utah, loss, and so much more. I'm so grateful for the community you've built on Girl's Camp and the presence you've been in my life. This shift towards reconstruction feels incredibly timely in my own life as well, as I have recently really felt drawn down that path myself, finally feeling a pull towards spiritual reconnection and just a general discovery of purpose after years of Mormon recovery. I feel so aligned with this new shift and can't wait to see where it takes you! Just wanted to send some support and love from a long-time listener <3

I'm in a new stage of life, very different from yours because I'm much older, but I think a life well-lived should include nearly constant reconstruction. You grow up, set goals, perhaps get an education to meet those goals, start a career...and then perhaps within a few years discover that the fulfillment you were going for might not be there. Or maybe it was there for a while, but then it wasn't anymore. What next? You may raise children and have goals related to that, then they grow up. What next? I feel like being self-aware includes being willing to change gears, consider what else may be important, re-consider how time and money is spent to find something else. I think it's wonderful to reframe your work in terms of reconstruction. I'm looking forward to listening more.

I was hoping you’d sing “aaaaaahhaaahaaaah.” From wicked haha-the title. Idk if that was intentional. Love this!! This is the content I’ve been dying for.

We are excited for what will come next ❤

I am so excited for this shift!! I have been with you since the beginning and it’s been so incredible to learn and grow along side with you and the girlscamp community you have created. You are incredible and I can’t wait to see what you talk about next🫶🏼🤍

Came so fast when I saw you uploaded this!

Omg I love this so much! ❤ I’ve enjoyed watching you the past year as I’ve navigated my own faith journey and feel excited to find meaning with you 😊

your glasses are so cute!!

All religions are BS

I’m catching up and just watching this but yes to the twins episode! I can also talk about this forever lol. I have twin 4 1/2 year old boys! I also just had a singleton girl a year ago. Motherhood man 😅 love watching your podcast! 🥰

The Wild Robot was so good - highly recommended!

Wow we do not have the same taste in media at all 😂 but I liked hearing about your favorites

Omg, Barbara Kingsolver is my favorite author of all time. The first of her books I read was The Poisonwood Bible. I gotta get back into reading, too.

So glad you enjoyed The Wild Robot! It was my favorite of the year, even though I don’t have kids.

Ask those same questions in a university class full of Muslims.

❤

I’m not sure if you know the song by the Byrds, which is that same verse from the Bible I’m in a difficult season but hoping I’ll grow from it. Right now it hurts so bad.

Thank you for the Kacey Musgraves rec, I really like the Architect song. I’ve heard her name off and on but hadn’t fully listened to her music. Happy New Year to you and your family. ❤