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Julie Shafer
США
Добавлен 7 апр 2016
Hi, my name is Julie and welcome to my channel! I'm a psychologist, coach, and author of Loved: Relationship Rules for Women Who Thought They Knew the Rules.
I help people break free from people-pleasing. I was caught in this cycle and so are most of my clients. In my videos I talk about how to get out of the cycle through better boundaries, better communication, emotional growth, and understanding yourself and others. If you get a lot out of this channel, you'll also learn how to navigate conflict better.
If you are ready to start healing yourself and your relationships, then hit the subscribe button so you don't miss out on valuable information that could change your life.
Hope you love the videos and that they help you create happier relationships and more success in your life!
All my best,
Julie
I help people break free from people-pleasing. I was caught in this cycle and so are most of my clients. In my videos I talk about how to get out of the cycle through better boundaries, better communication, emotional growth, and understanding yourself and others. If you get a lot out of this channel, you'll also learn how to navigate conflict better.
If you are ready to start healing yourself and your relationships, then hit the subscribe button so you don't miss out on valuable information that could change your life.
Hope you love the videos and that they help you create happier relationships and more success in your life!
All my best,
Julie
The ACA Method: Conquering Self-Criticism with A. Garcia
In this episode, I speak with A. Garcia, who shares her powerful story of surviving domestic violence and her journey toward healing. Garcia discusses her nonprofit, "Confronting Domestic Violence," and highlights the vital role emotional intelligence plays in overcoming trauma. We dive into the concept of the inner critic, exploring strategies for challenging negative self-talk and encouraging personal growth. Garcia introduces the ACA method-Acknowledge, Make a Choice, and Take Action-as a practical tool for managing self-criticism. Throughout our conversation, we emphasize the importance of self-reflection, intuition, and resilience in finding empowerment and achieving personal success...
Просмотров: 31
Видео
From Self-Doubt to Self-Love: The Power of Shadow Work with Junie Moon
Просмотров 6419 часов назад
In today’s video, I chat with my friend Junie Moon, a global love mentor and shadow work coach. We dive into shadow work and how it connects to that inner critic we all deal with. Junie shares her story of hitting rock bottom, battling fear and self-doubt, and discovering shadow work to reclaim the parts of herself she had hidden. We talk about how we all learn to suppress emotions to fit in, b...
Shut Down Your Inner Critic In 4 Easy Steps!
Просмотров 7128 дней назад
Dive into the inner critic, why it’s such a problem, and how you can start addressing it. This inner critic doesn’t help you grow; it just makes you feel worse about yourself, often leading to feelings of shame or guilt. These negative thoughts can paralyze you, making it hard to interact with others or feel good about yourself. I’ll also share some practical tips on managing and reducing this ...
Crush Your Inner Critic and Build Self Trust With These Practical Tips
Просмотров 73Месяц назад
Have you ever doubted yourself or felt unsure about your abilities? Trusting yourself is essential for achieving your goals and living authentically, but how do you actually do that? How do you develop self-confidence? I’m Dr. Julie, a psychologist and relationship coach. In today’s video, I’ll discuss what might be interfering with your self-confidence and offer practical tips to help you over...
4 Strategies for Managing Your Emotions
Просмотров 81Месяц назад
Have you ever felt overwhelmed by your emotions or found it difficult to manage your feelings in challenging situations? Do you often prioritize others' needs over your own, even when it leaves you feeling drained? Your emotion regulation skills determine how you express and act on those emotions. Developing these skills allows you to break free from the people-pleasing cycle and prioritize you...
Are you passive-aggressive?
Просмотров 129Месяц назад
Do you know someone who is passive-aggressive? Has anyone ever accused you of being passive-aggressive? Have you ever wondered what being passive-aggressive means? In this video, I'll explore passive-aggressive behavior and explain its various forms, including sarcasm, silent treatment, backhanded compliments, and procrastination. This episode aims to help you understand and manage passive-aggr...
Unlock The Secret To Balancing Being Nice and People-Pleasing: 10 Signs You've Crossed The Line!
Просмотров 1122 месяца назад
Have you wondered where being nice crosses over into people-pleasing? In today's video, I talk about how to figure out where the line is. I cover 5 issues you might have and 5 issues other people might have if you've crossed the line from being nice to people-pleasing. I’d love to hear your thoughts! What resonated with you the most? Let’s start a conversation and support each other on this jou...
How To Set Healthier Boundaries With Loving Detachment | Watch Now!
Просмотров 1482 месяца назад
In this RUclips video, I explore the concept of loving detachment and its role in setting healthy boundaries. I address the challenges people pleasers face in establishing and defending their boundaries. Loving detachment allows you to set boundaries while still maintaining love and care for others. Watch the video to learn more, and remember to reflect on how loving detachment can benefit you ...
How to Be Authentic Without Making a Fool of Yourself
Просмотров 1272 месяца назад
In this video, I discuss being true to yourself in personal interactions, highlight the importance of staying true to your values and being honest, offer tips on authenticity without compromising your beliefs, and discuss challenges like lack of confidence and people-pleasing habits. Find out what mental gymnastics in a story I share about a client and some changes she was being asked to make. ...
7 Signs You're A People Pleaser
Просмотров 1822 месяца назад
In this video, I take a closer look at the signs of being a people pleaser and stress the importance of addressing this behavior. I talk about how people-pleasing can negatively impact relationships and stress the need to prioritize your own needs. I share practical advice for changing these behaviors and encourage you to challenge yourself by selecting one sign to focus on. Plus, I provide a t...
9 Tips for Setting Better Boundaries
Просмотров 2132 месяца назад
In this video, I discuss the importance of setting healthy boundaries and offer nine practical tips to help you develop and maintain them. I address common struggles, especially for people pleasers, and emphasize that clear boundaries are essential for mutual respect and love. My tips include: ⏺ defining priorities ⏺ regularly assess and adjust as life changes ⏺ communicating clearly ⏺ spending...
How to Know if You Are Selfish
Просмотров 1,2 тыс.3 месяца назад
In today's video, I explore the fine line between selfishness and self-care. I'll identify signs of selfish behavior versus healthy self-care practices and offer tips on how you can find the right balance between prioritizing your own needs and considering others' needs for maintaining healthy relationships. Plus, I have a free guide on confident communication to help you express your needs ass...
Can Self-Love Really Change Your Life?
Просмотров 353 месяца назад
In this video, I interview Abby Kelly, a love and relationship coach, who shares her transformative journey toward self-love and empowerment. Abby discusses overcoming toxic relationships and a cancer diagnosis, which prompted her to rebuild her self-esteem and set boundaries. She emphasizes the importance of daily affirmations, positive self-talk, and enjoying one's own company. Abby also high...
4 Steps to Self-Forgiveness
Просмотров 193 месяца назад
In this video, I interview Sarah Schulting-Kranz about her personal journey of overcoming trauma and finding healing and forgiveness through nature. We discuss the three stages of Sarah's journey: victim, survivor, and thriver, and the significant role nature played in her recovery. Sarah shares how the healing power of the outdoors helped her find freedom and healing after a difficult divorce....
How Can You Become Toxic-Person Proof?
Просмотров 1973 месяца назад
How Can You Become Toxic-Person Proof?
Self-Criticism and How to Overcome It
Просмотров 544 месяца назад
Self-Criticism and How to Overcome It
Release the Need for Approval and Loving Who You Are
Просмотров 44 месяца назад
Release the Need for Approval and Loving Who You Are
7 Overlooked Rules for Relationships Online Course
Просмотров 4952 года назад
7 Overlooked Rules for Relationships Online Course
Tame Your Triggers | Relationship Advice | Effective Communication
Просмотров 252 года назад
Tame Your Triggers | Relationship Advice | Effective Communication
Handling Holiday Stress with A Garcia 2021
Просмотров 732 года назад
Handling Holiday Stress with A Garcia 2021
What an amazing story! I really liked her suggestion about defining the four S’s, and using that as a guide for moving forward.
She has quite a story, doesn't she? I love her approach.
Great interview with Junie! I would love to learn more about how to use shadow work for some of my physical healing and the medical problems that are “holding me back”
I was just responding. The book the body keeps the score is great. Also the body code & the emotion code (not really sure the difference) can help clear out stored traumas, generational trauma that you may not even know about…. It’s all amazing and makes so much sense
Hi. SW is extremely helpful. There's a whole chapter in my book about my back pain that didn't budge until I did my shadow work. The unconscious mind and all the programming is running in teh background of oru mind and the body will react to all the beliefs. Uncover the old programming and change it, heal it, the body heals too.
I really like your idea of setting small but achievable goals, but especially the tip about keeping a journal of my accomplishments. So that is the tip I’m going to apply. I have my notebook and a pen and I’m going to start journaling my goals and accomplishments starting today!
Yet another great video with some really helpful nuggets of wisdom! I am definitely going to try harder to do a better job of setting boundaries and saying no. Thank you so much Dr. Julie!
Thanks! I'm glad you're finding my videos helpful. 😊
I had no idea that giving someone the silent treatment was considered passive aggressive behavior. Thank you so much Dr Julie for your insights and advice. Your tip sheet is definitely worth reading, and so helpful!!
I’m glad you learned something. I hope it’s helpful 😊🩷
Wow, I had no idea there was such a thing as being too nice!
I bet that gives you something to think about!
Just what I needed to hear 🙌🏻 Your videos and insights about people pleasing are genuinely helping me to set stronger boundaries 🫶🏻
Love that!
I had never heard of loving detachment before, and you explained it so well! My biggest fear is that if I practice loving detachment with my husband, that he may continue to do unhealthy things, like eat unhealthy food, and that will possibly shorten his lifespan. So because of this, I tend to nag him to get him to eat right and to take his medications. I’m on the fence about what to do.
This is a tough one and lots of people (including me) have had to confront this dilemma. The consequences of your husband not taking care of himself hurt you, not just him, and you want him to be healthy, of course! But he's an adult and can make his own decisions. In fact, he probably dislikes being nagged, which makes him more resistant to eating healthy--he doesn't want to do "what he's told." You're best bet here is to explain how you feel and what you are going to do, *one time.* And then let him decide whether he is going to follow through or not. _For example, I want you to eat healthy so you are as healthy and happy as possible because I love you. I'm going to continue to make healthy meals and offer you healthy snacks, but I'm no longer going to insist that you eat them or nag you about not eating unhealthily. It's up to you whether you decide to eat healthy or not. And if you don't eat what I make, that's great because it leaves more for me!!_
@@drjulieshafer Thank you so much for your insight, that helps a lot!
Thank you Dr Julie! Your insight is spot on, as always!
You are so welcome!
as a people pleaser ive always been afraid to be authentic thank you for this insights very helpful
I'm glad it was helpful.
Greetings from Poland 🇵🇱😊
Thank you so much. I really needed to hear this. 💛
I'm so glad you found it helpful. 🩷
definitely the people pleasing signs I needed to know!
Your tip number 4 really resonated with me! Thank you so much, Dr. Julie!
Glad it was helpful! 🩷
I love this video! I think it would be really helpful. If you did another video with some specific examples of common situations and how a person could set boundaries.
Great suggestion!
what I needed to hear! Thank you Dr. Julie!
Glad it was helpful! 🩷
❤❤❤❤❤
Having kids in a broken world, instead of adopting, knowing climate changes, possibly harm, handicaps and other miseries that this world has to offer AND THEN judge women who chose to take care of themselves, travel, enjoy their young 20s and 30s , excel in their careers is selfish. More women should learn to be selfish with their time on Earth. Nobody ever asked us to be here, so it is up to us to chose how we want to live it. As long as it is not to harm others there is nothing wrong with saying NO I won't please others so that they are comfortable.
Yes! More women should take better care of themselves with their one, wonderful life ❤
The 'S' word. It's a tough one. I feel like we spend our whole lives undoing the indoctrination of our worthlessness. Thank you for this video, Julie. It's so needed. ❤ (And I love that shirt. 😍)
Thanks @erinlmatlock 🥰
This was a great episode!!!!
Thanks 🩷
Holy shit. I’m not selfish
Does that surprise you?
Self love ❤
Thanks 🩷🤩
Such good information.
Glad it was helpful! 🩷
This is me. Been working on this a lot. Taking time to be alone and get to know myself has been good for me.
🩷🩷
Love this.
Thanks 🩷
Thank you.
You're welcome! 🩷
great insights!
🩷🩷
Great video! Your tips on balancing self-care and considering others' needs were spot on!
I’m glad they were helpful 🩷
Wow, I had no idea that I wasn't actually being selfish! Thank you so much Dr. Julie!
Ideas to live by 😉🩷
Good luck. Try to improve the audio because the sound is very low.
Thanks for letting me know
Learn How Effective Communication Can Improve Your Relationships 👇🏻 www.drjulieshafer.com/effective-communication-guide